Part 2 (added 11/18/07)

	I finally have a whole day home alone again. It’s Saturday so no 
school and mom has to work!
	I'm writing this a little at a time while I'm 'playing'. So 
anyway I woke up this morning about 10:00 and like always my diaper was 
wet. I used to always wear attends youth, but now I wear Select 
small/med so that’s what I had on when I woke up. They're all white, 
and I like that because you can always see when they are wet and 
usually see that they are yellow with pee, too. I usually just sleep in 
a diaper and tee-shirt so when I get up the first thing I do is look at 
myself in the mirrored doors on my closet and see myself in my diaper. 
That always gets me hard and usually I take care of it in the shower 
after I get my diaper off, or on weekends I do it right in my wet night 
diaper and then take it off.
	Today though, I have the house to myself so no way am I going to 
get off so soon! I wore just my night diaper around while I got a 
Mountain Dew and stuff and then I had to pee so I went in my diaper. I 
guess it was too wet though already and it leaked down my legs and on 
the kitchen floor so I had to take it off. I almost put on another 
diaper then but I decided to get dressed for a while instead and read 
stories on the internet or something for a while. I put on white boxer 
briefs and jeans just with socks and my tee-shirt and spend a couple of 
hours surfing the web in my room. I had a couple more Mt Dews and then 
when I got up to get another one about half an hour ago I was in the 
kitchen and realized that I had to pee. I was standing there thinking 
about all the things I could do, but I really had to pee and I was 
holding it and then I just decided that I'd do it right there.
	It was kind of exciting to just let it go without any planning or 
anything, just like having a real accident and I had to go so bad that 
as soon as I stopped trying to hold it I had an urge and then I was 
wetting my pants. At first I was peeing hard in my underwear and jeans 
but then I made myself stop so that my bladder wouldn’t be empty. I 
still wet so much that the crotch of my pants was completely soaked and 
I was wet past the knee down both legs. Sometimes I love staging an 
accident and wetting my pants and I like to pretend that I did it 
somewhere that I can’t change right away and have to wear my wet cloths 
around. So I got a Mt Dew and went back to my room still wearing my wet 
jeans and started looking here and then started writing, so right now 
I'm sitting here in my wet jeans and underwear and I've been hard 
almost the whole time! I can smell the pee in my pants whenever I move 
and my underwear are all stuck to me and since I've been sitting down 
the back of my jeans are wet now too just like I peed my pants 
somewhere and then had to sit in them in the car to ride home.
	I'm starting to have to pee again, and I'm thinking about just 
doing it in my pants again like I couldn’t wait till I got home and had 
to wet myself again in the car, but since my pants are already wet 
that’s not as much fun. I think I'll put on a diaper instead and then 
pretend that I was made to because I wet my pants and that I have to 
use it and wear it as punishment. I'll be back...
	I took off my wet pants and underwear together and left them on 
the floor right here where I can see them and remember that I had an 
'accident' in my pants. I can see part of the front of my white 
underwear and its all yellow with my pee almost up to the waist band. I 
got a diaper and laid down on the edge of my bed to put it on. (That’s 
how I almost always put my diaper on, laying on the edge of my bed with 
my legs over the edge.) I can watch myself doing it in the mirrors on 
my closet, and sometimes I pretend that I'm watching someone else 
putting their diaper on, or that someone is diapering me. I decided I 
didn’t like the idea of being punished for my accident... I don’t 
really want to be punished, just to be embarrassed I guess. Anyway I 
changed my mind and decided that I was getting a diaper on because I 
was going on a long car trip and had to wear it since I'd wet my pants 
the last time I went on a long trip like that because I couldn’t hold 
it long enough. I put on some track pants over my diaper cause they 
would be easy to get off to change in a car (which I have done) and 
left my tee-shirt on. So now I'm writing this pretending that I'm in 
the car in a diaper and I don’t know if I'll have to use it or not or 
whatever.
	When I was younger sometimes I really did wear diapers in the car 
like that. I know everyone says stuff like that in the stories and 
whatever, but I really did a bunch of times until I was about 11 or 12. 
Not like every time we went somewhere, and my mom never diapered me 
herself after I was about 8 years old, and I never rode in the car with 
just a diaper on or anything like that but I was told to put one on 
sometimes and I did and lots of those times I ended up going in my 
diaper because I had to go and there wasn’t a good place to stop. I 
used to have to go pretty often, and sometimes just all of a sudden I 
had to go a lot worse, not like the normal build up to having to go 
bad. I don’t really do that anymore, and even when I do I can hold it a 
long time even though it’s uncomfortable and I worry that I really will 
pee my pants but it doesn’t happen.
	The last time I was told to wear a diaper other than to bed I was 
11 and we were going to visit my cousins about 4 hours away and a lot 
of it is over country roads where there aren’t many places to stop and 
go to the bathroom unless you do it on the side of the road. Mom 
reminded me that it was like that and said I might want to wear a 
diaper and bring one for the trip home. I didn’t really want to because 
I was afraid my cousins would find out but I also don’t like having to 
go and having to hold it and being afraid that I'll wet my pants so I 
put one on under my cloths before we left, and mom put an extra in her 
purse for me to put on to wear back.
	We stopped once on the way and I peed in the bathroom there and I 
was dry when we got to my cousins house. I took my diaper off in the 
bathroom first thing and left it on the sink with my mom right outside 
the bathroom door like she needed to go next. When I came out she went 
right in and put my diaper in her purse so no one would see it.
	Before we left to go home mom went to the bathroom and left my 
2nd diaper on the sink and I went in right behind her and put it on. On 
the way home about half way there mom said that she didn’t need to stop 
but that she would if I needed too. I had to go but not bad or anything 
and it was late and I was tired and I told mom I didn’t really have to. 
She said that I probably should, but since I had a diaper on just in 
case it was fine if I wanted to wait till we got home. After a while I 
couldn’t hold it and told mom that I really had to go, she said that 
she'd find someplace for me to go, or I could do it in my diaper if I 
wanted (or had to) since we were going to be home soon anyway. I said 
I'd just try to wait but I ended up using my diaper.
	Since then I haven’t worn a diaper outside the house except to 
bed when we've stayed all night somewhere, but I have had 1 accident in 
the car when I was 12. We were pulling in the driveway when I couldn’t 
hold it anymore and wet my pants. If we'd been farther from home I'd 
have peed in a bottle or something but we were so close I tried to wait 
instead. Mom wasn’t mad or anything and since it was just us it wasn’t 
that big of a deal. I'd still like to be able to wear diapers for trips 
and stuff just because it would sometimes be easier and I wouldn’t have 
to be afraid of having an accident but now I'd just be embarrassed to 
tell mom I wanted to wear one and I'm not sure what she would say if I 
wore one and she found out. I don’t think she'd be mad, but she might 
get worried or take me to the doctor or something if I told her that I 
was having trouble holding it or something.
	My cousin who is a year younger than me told me one time that 
when he was 12 he had to go real bad in his parents van and he was 
holding himself to keep from having an accident till they could stop. 
He said that he got hard from doing it and was rubbing himself to help 
him hold it but that he finally actually came in his pants then 
immediately lost control and peed in them too. He was real embarrassed 
just telling me, but we were sort of talking about jacking off anyway, 
and he knows that I still wet the bed so I wouldn’t make fun or tell 
anyone or anything. He doesn’t wet the bed and as far as I know he 
doesn’t like to 'play' like I do. I've been trying to recreate his 
accident ever since he told me but I've never been able to get the 
timing right so that when I came I lost control and peed at the same 
time, I'm always still able to hold it, though every time I try it I 
still let go and pee as soon as I can.
	The last couple of months I've been waking up dry more and more 
often. Until last year I was wet every single night. Then I started 
having a dry night just every once in a while. Now though I'm dry 
probably 1 night a week or more so I guess I'm finally outgrowing 
wetting my bed. In a big way I don’t want to wet the bed on accident 
all the time, but I know that if/when I get completely dry at night I 
wont be able to get diapers anymore so I always pee in my diaper in the 
morning when I wake up dry before I even get out of bed and I haven’t 
ever told my mom that I've had a dry night. If I have to I'll fake it 
every night until I move out on my own and can get diapers for myself 
and wear them whenever I want. I would so hate to not have diapers it’s 
worth not sleeping over or whatever just to have them. Recently I've 
been putting a diaper on when I get home from school and wearing it 
till mom gets home from work. A couple of times I've worn it almost all 
evening and wet in it a couple of times without her even knowing I had 
it on. It’s scary but exciting that I might get caught and I feel 
really naughty for doing it, which is also cool. The only problem is 
that I'm using too many diapers and I'm afraid that mom will eventually 
ask why, since I should only need one a day. Luckily she buys them like 
120 at a time and doesn’t keep track of when she bought them last. When 
I get down to like 20 left I just tell her and she orders more and they 
get delivered. 120 should last 4 months, but allowing for a few to get 
torn or whatever it’s really like 3 months and 3 weeks. I kept track 
and the last case lasted only about 3 months but mom didn’t even 
mention it so I guess I'm cool. I don’t think she really counts or even 
pays attention to it at all.
	Anyway now I'm starting to have to pee again. I'm pretending that 
I'm in the car and I'm looking around and it’s a pretty deserted 
stretch of highway with no likely looking places to stop. I embarrassed 
to say that I have to go and don’t want to have to get and try to go 
beside the road with a diaper on so I'm just trying to hold it, but 
it’s getting worse. I'm squeezing my legs together to help me hold it 
and starting to fight in my seat because it’s harder to hold it if I 
sit still. I'm looking and there still isn’t anyplace at all to stop. 
Now I'm having to grab myself once in a while to keep from having an 
accident, I'm getting scared that I won’t be able to make it. I've 
really gotta pee bad now! Now I almost can’t turn loose of my self, I'm 
pinching it through my pants and diaper and cant hold still even for a 
second. I know I'm going to have and accident now but I'm still trying 
to hold it because I'm ashamed. I can’t wait anymore I'm peeing in my 
diaper now and I can’t stop I'm peeing so hard but I'm trying my best 
to stop it before I leak or something. Oh god I really had an accident, 
it's a good thing I was wearing a diaper or my pants would be wet and 
everyone would know I peed myself. My diaper is really wet and hot (and 
I'm really hot too). I'm so hard I feel like I'm going to poke through 
my diaper! I'm imagining sitting here in a wet diaper in the back of 
the car going down the road with my shame all to myself, and knowing 
that I'll have to sit in my pee till we get home and I can get this 
diaper off. Now I can’t stop touching myself because it feels too good. 
I really wanted to play longer but I can’t stop and I'm going to get my 
self off in my diaper right here at my desk! Oh wow I just cam so hard!
I'm soaked and super sticky and gotta go get cleaned up. I'll write 
again soon!