HOW I MET CHIP "CHIPPER" (MY BEST FRIEND) INTRO
By Cody Matthew James III

The story you are about to read is based on a true story about myself. 
As I grew up I had a few accidents in the first few years of my life 
that changed my life forever. At 3 years old I split my scalp open 
while playing with my older brother. When I was five, I knocked out my 
upper and lower front teeth while playing on a jungle gym. At six I 
fell into my bedroom window while I was playing with our dog and nearly 
cut my arm off below the shoulder. That accident left me my right arm 
with very little feeling and limited movement of my lower arm and right 
hand, and I was born right-handed. The doctors had told my mom I would 
need extensive physical therapy and more surgery after I was older. My 
mom knew she could never afford the cost of the surgeries and physical 
therapy I would need for the next few years, so she relinquished me to 
the custody of the child welfare department.

By this time my mom was divorced the second time and was supporting my 
brother, sister and me. My mom was looking for a job and a new husband 
after I turned seven. I remember the day I left home to go live in my 
first foster home after I had just turned seven, and how I was taken 
from my home screaming and fighting all the way. From age seven to 
fifteen years old, I spent those years of my life in three foster 
homes, one children's home, and a boy's home. The boy's home, and a 
friend I'll call Chip had the greatest influence on my life. Without 
the help and understanding from the counselors at the boys' home, and 
Chipper, I would not be writing this story today. I most likely would 
have ended up dead from a beating, or from a shoot out with the cops. I 
went from being one of the most despised boys in the boys home to being 
voted most improved and likable by all the boys and staff there towards 
the end of my stay.

The last of my big accidents happened while I was living at the 
children's home. It was there I was run over by a flatbed truck, over 
my stomach and groin when I was ten years old. It was then that I lost 
control over my bladder and was temporally paralyzed from my waist down 
for a few weeks. The doctors said it was a kind of spinal cord shock 
and they hoped I would recover which I did� with one exception. I 
didn't know from which point I was going to start telling my story 
until I remembered the first time I saw Chip.

It was the first day of class in the sixth grade for me, and I remember 
that day very well. In this story I will often reminisce about the 
previous years in my life, and how they influenced me. Growing up in 
foster homes, and other homes is hard on a kid, and being shipped 
around to new homes especially when you are going through puberty will 
mess up a kid quicker then anything else, I moved to the boys' home the 
day after I got out of the fifth grade, and it was the start of a long 
hot summer for me. I had one mean temper and thanks to Chip, the boys 
home, and a counselor I will name Tommy, I learned to control it, but 
it took time.

(All the names of the people in this story have been changed to protect 
their identities. The dates and names of the places were also changed.)

CMJ III

P.S. I am A.D.H.D. and typed these stories with mainly my left hand. 
(Like Tommy told me, nothing is impossible.) (THANKS ALEX FOR 
EVERYTHING)

HOW I MET CHIP "CHIPPER" Chapter 1 (MY BEST FRIEND) By Cody Matthew 
James III

This would be the 7th school I attended since I started going to school 
in kindergarten. I was hoping I would be able to finish the 6th grade 
with no more interruptions. The bus came to a stop in front of a group 
of teachers in front of the office. As we got off the bus, a teacher 
was telling the students, "Those with last names starting with A thru N 
I want you over here, and those with last names starting with O thru Z 
I want those students over there." As the students started separating 
into two lines, I found myself nearly at the end of a very long line. 
First day of school I thought to myself. I wonder if I will get a 
female teacher or a male teacher this year. I liked the male teachers 
the best. They seemed to be less strict then the female teachers I have 
had in the past. I looked down the long row of students in front of me 
and counted about 70 students. It's going to be awhile before I get my 
room assignment I thought.

The sun was now beating down hard on me on that hot September morning 
and I was starting to get thirsty. NOT NOW, I said to myself, you don't 
need any water yet. The school day has not even started I said to 
myself. I was trying to limit my water intake so I could make it at 
least until lunch before I needed to have my diaper changed. I looked 
at the mountains to my left and noticed how clear they seemed to be. I 
could even see the fire road I hiked up with some of the other boys 
from Mark Allen boy's home two weeks ago. The air was so clear I could 
see the area where we had eaten our lunch that day. How I wished I was 
still up there, smelling that beautiful pine scent. It was a good hike 
that day, and our counselor (Tommy) at Mark Allen boys home said he 
might start a hiking club this year if enough boys were interested. I 
told Tommy I would be the first to sign up if he had the paper to start 
a list. Hiking was one of the only things I could do really well. I 
played a little football at the boy's home, but being small and skinny, 
but fast, the only position I liked to play was receiver. I caught 
about half the throws to me, but when I caught them, it was only with 
my left hand. It had been almost seven years since I had my accident 
with my right arm. 'GOD' how I wished I hadn't fallen into that plate 
glass window I thought. I could be playing football with two good arms 
instead of one. Maybe I might have even liked playing baseball too, if 
I had two good hands. I looked at my right arm, it was there but it had 
very little function left in it. It just took up space between my 
shoulder and my fingers. I had very little movement and sensation left 
in my right arm and fingers now, and being born right-handed had made 
it that much harder for me to write left handed now.

I had just turned six when I was playing with our one-year-old German 
Shepard puppy named Pepper, when I climbed onto his doghouse in the 
back yard of our house. I lost my balance and fell into the glass 
window of my bedroom and slid down the outside of the house while the 
razor sharp glass cut through my skin, muscles, nerves and tendons. I 
lost so much blood, that my heart had stopped beating in the ambulance 
on the way to the hospital. Only the fast thinking by the paramedics 
kept me alive. So much damage was done to my right arm that it took two 
more surgeries to get my arm to the point where I can lift it almost 
above my head now, and the doctor said I would need physical therapy 
for a while and maybe more surgery. I looked toward the line and 
realized the line had moved about five feet since I had been 
daydreaming. I moved up quickly so I would not be embarrassed by 
holding up the line. As I strained to hear, I could hear the teachers 
at the table in the front of the line saying, "Last name first, First 
name last". There were about thirty students ahead of me now when I 
felt my pants getting warmer in the front and crotch. I was hoping I 
could make it at least until lunch before I totally soaked my diaper. I 
didn't have that much to drink at breakfast in the dining hall at the 
boy's home this morning, or so I thought. Well this means I will be 
seeing Miss Barns the school nurse earlier then I thought.

The line was moving more quickly now, and as I grew closer to the table 
I was practicing to myself James......Cody....��.. James.....Cody When 
I got to the table, the teacher looked into my eyes and said, "Last 
name, and first name" I said in a whisper, "James Cody." "I WANT YOUR 
LAST NAME FIRST....FIRST NAME LAST" she seemed to be screaming at me, 
"James is my last name, and Cody is my first name" I told the teacher 
as she looked at me.

"Oh then let's see........................... James , Cody �����.Room 
12A" she said, then wrote the room number down on a card with my name 
JAMES - CODY RM. 12A TEACHER- MR. MARKSON.

"When your class starts, you will need to give this card to your 
teacher," she said. As I looked at the card I thought to myself, good I 
got a male teacher this year. I followed some of the other students 
hoping they were going in the right direction, they looked like they 
were 6th graders like me, but they were much taller then me. Being 13 
years old and only in the 6th grade was a little embarrassing for me, 
but being only four foot 1 inch tall, some of my former class mates had 
thought I had skipped a couple of grades, until they found out how old 
I really was. That was not going to happen this time at this school, as 
far as I was concerned, I was only eleven years old like every one 
else, and short for my age. If anyone asked me, I was going to tell 
them I was born in 1979 and totally forget about 1977. Right now as far 
as I was concern, I was a small 11-year-old 6th grader. As I turned the 
corner of the first set of rooms, I noticed the sign: "Main Office and 
Nurse's Office'

As I looked at the sign, I felt my crotch getting warmer, and I figured 
I better make my way to the nurse's office now so I can change my 
diaper before it started leaking. As I walked down the hallway, I 
looked up at the numbers over the top of the doors and noticed they 
were getting smaller. Well I guess my room is in the other direction. 
As I got to the end of the hallway, I saw the door to the nurse's 
office. I reached down for the doorknob when all of a sudden the door 
opened and a female teacher started to come out. She stopped and stared 
at me and asked me were I thought I was going. I told her I needed to 
see the nurse.

"Why do you need to see her now, do you have an upset stomach on the 
first day of school?" she asked me sarcastically.

"I... I...I. just need to see the nurse" I told her.

"Well I don't think you need to see her now, SO get to your class NOW" 
I turned and headed back the way I had just come from. I could feel my 
diaper sagging lower now and wondered if it would last at least until 
the first recess break.

It seemed liked I had walked a mile before I saw a number 12 above any 
of the doors. Let's see ....12D........12C.......12B......12A, Good, I 
was finally here. I looked at the large note tacked on the door, "CHECK 
THE BOARD AT THE FRONT OF THE ROOM FOR YOUR DESK ASSIGNMENT! Signed Mr. 
Markson As I looked in, I could see all the desks were arranged into 
rows of about six, and there were five desks in each row. Let's see 6 
times 5 equals 30. 30 students must be assigned to this classroom I 
thought to myself. As I peeked inside I looked toward the rear of the 
classroom, I notice about eight girls talking amongst themselves about 
something or another. I started to enter the classroom when a student 
flew by me and headed toward the seating chart posted on the board, I 
watched him skim over the seating arrangements from the bottom towards 
the top of the list, He stopped on the first row left and said under 
his breath.

"Not the front row again" He turned and saw me still standing near the 
door, and without saying a word, rushed past me and out of the 
classroom. I looked around the room again, and feeling the coast was 
clear, I headed to the chart to see where I was going to sit. As I 
checked out the chart, I didn't have far to go. I was the first desk in 
the 2nd row. I was glad that I was assigned to a front desk like they 
promised, I felt more secure, and it was less likely any one was going 
to bother me or harass me in the front row like they did in the 5th 
grade when I was sitting near the back of the classroom.

I made my way over to what I thought was my desk and sat down. I was 
ready for the start of 6th grade I hoped. I had my notebook, pens and 
pencils ready. Maybe this year would be a lot better then last year, 
The school bell rang and I looked up at the clock. It was only 10 
minutes before eight. I was told that class started at eight sharp, so 
I guess I was a little early. Students were now coming into the 
classroom, and most were going straight for the seating chart on the 
board. I watched them as they checked the chart and went to their 
seats. It was almost two minutes of eight when the kid who rushed past 
me came in and took the seat to the left of me. I casually glanced in 
his direction to see what he looked like. As he sat there, he looked 
like he was over five feet tall. His hair was pure brown, straight, and 
cut across the front so he had bangs over his eyes. He had perfectly 
straight hair. How I wished my hair was straight like his and not 
curly. I always hated my hair. I took a second glance and noticed he 
was staring at me and checking me out from head to toe. I quickly 
pretended I was looking out the door so he would not think I was 
staring at him.

My timing was right as our teacher Mr. Markson was entering the room. 
He looked like he was about fifty years old and he was kind of short at 
about five foot five inch tall. He walked to a large desk at the rear 
of the classroom carrying a brief case that was worn and well beaten 
up. By the clothes he was wearing you would think he could afford a 
better briefcase. He was wearing a button-down yellow short sleeve 
shirt, and brown slacks that looked like they have never been worn 
before. I got a kick when I saw the shoes he was wearing; they were 
white and blue tennis shoes with red shoelaces. I think I'm going to 
like my new teacher I thought to myself.

"Okay new and returning students, I want you to pass the cards with 
your names on them to the front of each row, the cards the teacher gave 
you in front of the office building this morning. I will come by and 
pick them up in a minute, after you have done that, I want you to take 
out three pieces of paper for your first assignment of the new school 
year. When the students heard that all you could hear was Ahhh. Mr. 
Markson walked to the front of the class and started gathering the 
cards at the front of each row as he made his way from left to right. 
He put the cards in his shirt pocket and then picked up the board 
marker and wrote on the board: "SUMMER VACATION".

"Students I want you to write three pages on one of the following 
subjects: #1 WHAT I DID ON MY SUMMER VACATION-------#2 WHAT I WANTED TO 
DO ON MY SUMMER VACATION---------#3 WHAT I THOUGHT I DID ON MY SUMMER 
VACATION or #4 WHAT I DID ON MY SUMMER VACATION AND GOT AWAY WITH!" Mr. 
Markson said as he finished writing on the board, and eyed most of the 
students. When I saw the topics, I knew I was going to like having Mr. 
Markson for a teacher. I choose the third one because I knew I could 
easily write a thousand pages on the subject.

"You have about one hour forty five minutes to finish before your first 
break this morning. I will be calling each of you one at a time to my 
desk to talk to you. Now on the top of your papers, I want you to print 
your first name first and your last name last. Under that I want you to 
print your birthday, month, day, and year. Under that I want you to 
print your sex i.e. Male, Female, or Undetermined at this point of 
time, and I don't want to see any yes or no or I hope to some day 
answers," Mr., Markson said to us with a little smile on his face.

"Now for the first student I want to talk to���" I noticed the kid on 
my right start to sink lower in his seat.

"That's right, Chip Thompson, Come on downnnnn!!!" Well I now knew this 
kids name, and I guess Mr. Markson knew him pretty well too by the way 
he called his name out. As Chip got up, I felt my diaper start to warm 
up in the front again. I hope I can make it to recess before I need to 
have my Pamper changed. I started writing and when I got to the second 
line I wondered if Markson would be checking my birthday against any 
records he might have on me. I wrote 7-16-79 and continued with the 
rest of the assignment. I was temped to write, under sex, Not Now I 
have a headache, but I chickened out and just wrote male. I was about 
half way thru on my first page when Chip came back to his desk. I 
glanced at Chip and in a little whisper asked him what did Markson want 
to talk to us about?

"Oh a bunch of nothing" Chip said then he started working on the 
assignment. When I was just about finished with the second page, I was 
getting nervous because I was the next one to be called according to 
the way Markson was calling names. When I saw the girl in the last desk 
in Chip's row return to her desk, I knew I was up next!

"Cody James�.or is it� James Cody, you're up! I got up and walked to 
the back of the room trying to be as inconspicuous as possible. I sat 
down in the chair next to his desk.

"Let's see your name is Cody Matthew James, right?' Markson asked me

"Yes" I said in a whisper.

"You were born on 7-16-77" and�..and you don't like peas at dinner 
time, and I see you hate the color pink" Markson said to me. After 
Markson made these statements to me, I could not help but to look him 
in the eye bashfully and say

"I hate peas anytime, and I don't mind pink as long as there are blue 
polka dots on it" Markson gave a little chuckle and continued

"You've had quite a few accidents in your life I see. You lost your 
hearing for awhile when you were two, you knocked out some teeth when 
you were five�.and you fell through a window about six���.crack on your 
head at eight��. Where did Markson get this information on me I thought 
to myself? ��. and you were run over by a truck when you were about 
ten��. That's why you need��.so you haven't been wearing them too long? 
Markson said very quietly. When Markson made that statement to me I 
bowed my head a little and could feel my face turning red

"Yes" I said to him.

"You are thirteen years old, and held back about two years because of 
surgeries and physical therapy?

"Yes' I whispered, staring at the floor.

"When the recess bell rings, would you please stay here in the 
classroom so we can talk?" Mr. Markson asked me quietly.

"Well I need to�� well I�.. I need to see the nurse first and then I 
can come back" I more or less asked Mr. Markson.

"I see. Then I will see you after that. You can return to your desk now 
Cody" I got up and was walking back to my desk when I heard "Kenny 
Walters, you're the next student I would like to meet" As I sat down at 
my desk, Chip looked at me for a second and asked what Markson talked 
to me about.

"Nothing much" I said When I said that to Chip, he looked me in the 
eye, and I guess that I knew at that point we were going to be best 
friends for the school year. As I sat there, I noticed Chip's nose was 
twitching every now and then. I was hoping it was not because of the 
smell of my wet diaper, but maybe because of the pollen in the air on 
this hot September morning. I had finished my paper and was going over 
it when the bell rang. The students were getting up and making for the 
door when I heard Mr. Markson say:" Hold on you animals, I want your 
papers on the top of your desk and put everything else under your 
seat���.then you made proceed outside and partake in some outdoor 
activities if you so wish."

It seemed to me that Mr. Markson had so many faces, that you never 
could tell what he was going to say or do next. I finished putting my 
notebook, and backpack under my seat and grabbed the blue sweater off 
the back of my chair and wrapped it around my waist just in case. I 
hurried out the door on my way to the nurse's office. When I cleared 
the doorway; I looked over my left shoulder and could see Chip leaning 
against a metal support pole that was holding up the roof over the 
walkway. He was casually eating an apple and his eyes followed me as I 
quickly walked down the hallway. As I turned the corner, I did a quick 
glance at him again and his eyes seemed to be following me until the 
next row of classrooms blocked his view. It felt like forever before I 
got to the nurse's office. I opened the door and walked in and saw the 
long counter in front of me. As I approached the counter, I heard a 
voice call out

"How may I help you?" I walked up to the counter and saw the nurse 
sitting behind her desk to the right of the examination table. When I 
saw her looking at me, the only thing I could think of saying:

" My�.My Name Is�. Cody James, and I need something"

"And what do you need Cody James?" the nurse asked me.

"I was told to come here when I�.I.. need to be�..changed"

"OH, you are Cody from Mark Allen boys home, aren't you?" she said as 
she got up from her desk and walked over to the counter.

"Yessss" I said

" Why don't you walk around the counter over there and I can help you 
get changed Cody." Miss Barns said with a large smile on her face. I 
turned and started walking along the counter while I took my sweater 
off from around my waist, and sat it on the counter. When I rounded the 
counter Miss Barns took my hand and led me over to the exanimation 
table. She turned me so my back was towards the examination table and 
reached under my armpits and lifted me up onto the table like I was a 
three year old. I was so embarrassed; I could feel my face was turning 
red. She reached up and ran her fingers through my hair. I felt a chill 
run down my back then she said: "I wish I had beautiful curly blond 
hair like yours, Cody."

My eyes slowly wondered up to see what she looked liked up close as I 
really didn't pay that much attention to her appearance until now. Her 
soft auburn shoulder length hair and hazel eyes reminded me so much of 
Sandy, the girl I fell madly in love with last year at Emerson 
elementary school. I guess it was a little too late for Sandy and me to 
get to know each other really good. Sandy and I started talking to each 
other about mid May and by the time school was out for the summer, we 
were kissing and holding hands. When the teachers saw us holding hands 
in the schoolyard, they would make us go to separate areas of the 
playground and try to keep us apart. She was the first girl that I 
thought wasn't yucky, and now it looked like Miss. Barns could have 
been Sandy's mother. Since I was taken out of the third foster home, I 
really missed Sandy. Now I was over thirty miles away from her now, and 
I missed her. Some people say you never forget your first true love and 
I will never forget Sandy.

"You stay right here Cody, and I'll be right back." I followed her 
every step as she walked around the table and headed to the walk-in 
closet at the rear of the room. When she got there, she turned on the 
light, lighting up the large closet. I watched as she disappeared for a 
moment and then appeared holding a white Pampers diaper and cloth 
canvas bag in her hand. I was hoping that when I was moved to the boys' 
home, I could at least wear a plain disposable diaper and not the 
Pampers diapers with the babyish prints on the front. Tommy, my cottage 
counselor told me, before school started this year, that if I wanted to 
wear disposable diapers at school, that I would have to wear Pampers 
because they still fit me and were about half the price of the other 
plain disposable diapers and the boys home could afford that. Otherwise 
I would have to wear a cloth diaper instead. I didn't want to wear a 
cloth diaper to school because I would have to take it back to the 
boy's home with me in a plastic bag on the school bus. That was the 
last thing I wanted to take home with me on a school bus was a, wet, 
smelly cloth diaper, so I opted for the Pampers diapers instead.

"Here you go Cody, now you can change yourself." Miss. Barns said as 
she handed me the diaper and my accessories bag. I took the diaper from 
her and set it down, and as I was about to take the bag, I looked up 
and said; I�.I. can't ..do it all...by. . myself because of my�my arm.

"Oh, I totally forgot about your right arm Cody, I'm sorry. Here let me 
give you a hand" Miss Barns walked around to the right side of the 
table I was sitting on and placed the canvas bag down beside me on the 
table. She took my feet and lifted them over and placed them on the 
table.

"You'll will have to forgive me Cody, but this is the first time I have 
changed a boy your age, I mean, I changed my nephews' diapers over this 
past summer while I babysat him but he was only eighteen months old. I 
unbuckled my belt and unsnapped my pants, and then nervously lay down 
on my back and with my left hand, pushed my pants down as far as I 
could reach. Miss. Barns stood there while I struggled and then she 
reached over and took hold of my pants and slowly pulled them down to 
my ankles.

"I see you're wearing a bodysuit Cody, were you cold this morning?" she 
asked me as she unsnapped my shirt between my legs.

"No" I answered sheepishly

"I just wanted to make sure none of the other students found out what I 
was wearing at school" As she finished with the last snap, she pulled 
my body shirt up over onto my stomach and then pulled my blue plastic 
pants down my legs to my ankles. She unfastened the tapes holding my 
diaper on. I lifted my legs and rear up so she could take the diaper 
out from under me. As I held my rear up, Miss. Barns opened the canvas 
bag and took out one of my disposable changing pads and placed it under 
my rear. As I let my rear down on the pad Miss. Barns took out the tub 
of Pampers baby wipes and peeled of the protective plastic wrap 
covering the tub.

"These were the same type I used to clean my nephew with when I changed 
his diapers over the summer." Miss. Barns told me. I felt my face 
getting redder now as I imagined myself being eighteen months old again 
and laying on a dressing table with a baby bottle in my mouth and 
having my diaper changed.

"I read your medical report in your personal file a few days ago Cody 
and understand you were actually run over by the rear wheels of a 
truck? I'm surprised you weren't killed" My attention snapped back to 
where I was as I felt her lift my legs and rear up into the air and 
start cleaning my rear with the baby wipes.

"Well I kind of jumped off the back bed of the truck as it was going 
forward slowly and another bigger boy jumped off about a second earlier 
then me and I bounced off of him and landed on my back under the truck. 
Before I could get out of the way, the truck ran over my stomach and my 
hips. The doctor said I was really lucky that it was a stake bed truck 
with two tires on each side of the rear. He also said it was a good 
thing I was as skinny as I was or I might have been killed. The doctor 
said my liver, spinal cord and bladder were damaged and he didn't know 
if I would be able to walk normally again. I was in bed for over two 
weeks before I could barely stand on my feet. I had over three months 
of physical therapy before I could walk well again. I had to repeat 4th 
grade again and that's one of the reasons why I'm thirteen years old 
now.

"You're done Cody" I looked down and saw my body shirt was snapped 
closed now. I was talking so much that I did not realize Miss Barns had 
cleaned me up, put a new diaper on me, and pulled my plastic pants back 
up over my diaper. I sat up and swung my legs over the edge of the 
table and hopped down to the floor with Miss. Barns help. I quickly 
pulled my pants up then Miss barns pulled my zipper up and fastened my 
pants. She buckled my belt and then pulled my shirt out of my pants so 
it would just hang out. I liked to let my shirt just hang there, 
looking unkempt; it made me feel better. As I walked around the counter 
to the door, I grabbed my sweater as I said,

"Thank you Miss Barns" I saw a glint in her eyes before the door closed 
behind me. I looked at my watch on my left arm and then started walking 
faster back to my classroom. There were only six minutes left in recess 
and I knew Mr. Markson still wanted to talk to me. As I turned the 
corner, I looked up and Chip was still leaning against the same steel 
pole. As I walked down the hallway, Chip caught sight of me and watched 
me as I walked by him and into the classroom. I saw Mr. Markson 
reading, I guess, the papers we had done before recess. He was at his 
desk, leaning back in his chair with his feet on top of the desk. I saw 
the smile on his face as he placed one paper down and started reading 
the next one.

"Mr. Markson," I said in a quiet voice as I approached him.

"I'm here"

"Oh, Cody, come on over here and have a seat. I need to talk to you for 
a few minutes. ��I saw in your file your living at Mark Allen boy's 
home?"

"Yes" I said.

"What cottage are you in?" Mr. Markson asked me as he looked me in the 
eye. I looked down towards the floor and nervously pushed my feet back 
and forth as I answered him, "Cottage A"

"I worked at Mark Allen as a boy's counselor a few years back. Isn't 
cottage A for the youngest boys there?" Mr. Markson asked me 
inquisitively.

"Yes" I mumbled.

"Why are you in cottage A, and not B or C like other boys your age?" he 
asked.

"I was put in cottage A because I was small and also because some of 
the boys in cottage A still wet their beds at night and they felt it 
would be easier on me." I said as I tried not to look Markson in the 
eye.

"What are the other boys ages in your cottage now Cody?" Markson asked 
me as he took his feet off his desk and sat up in his chair.

"Five, six, and seven years old I guess."

"How do you feel about it?"

"My mom said she thought it would be better for me not to be in a 
cottage where the other boys would tease me about having to wear 
diapers all the time, and since I was small it would be easier for me 
to defend myself in cottage A since the boys were about the same size 
as me."

"You do seem a little bit small for your age, Cody, have you seen a 
doctor about it?"

"The doctor said my growing slowed down a lot right after my arm 
accident, but after my arm heals up more I should start growing again."

"How tall are you now, Cody?"

"About four foot, one inch I guess" I said as I was getting nervous 
again. The recess bell rang and Mr. Markson said I could go to my desk. 
I got up from the chair and turned to go to my seat and I stopped right 
there when I saw Chip standing at the opened door leaning against the 
door frame with his arms folded across his chest. I hoped he didn't 
hear the discussion I had with Mr. Markson I said silently to myself, 
He had that same smile on his face. I walked over and then up the isle 
to my desk while I watched Chip take his seat about the same time as 
me. I heard my diaper rustle a little as I sat down. I quickly looked 
at Chip to see if he heard anything. Chip was writing something down on 
a piece of paper when he looked at me, and then started writing again. 
Mr. Markson got up off his chair and headed out the door to get the 
other students that were lined up out on the playground.

"Cody, I noticed your right arm is smaller then your left arm. What 
happened to it?" Chip asked.

"It's a long story�I fell into a window when I was six years old and 
almost cut my arm off" The students were coming back into the classroom 
now followed by Mr. Markson. He walked to the board at the front of the 
room and picked up the marker.

"Students, every morning I want you to bring the following items to 
class with you: Two number two pencils, sharpened, two pens, blue ink 
only, medium and or fine point. One ruler with inch and millimeter 
markings on it. Note book with plenty of paper. Eraser, and the 
following books I am going to hand out shortly. Also it would be a good 
idea if you brought a softbound dictionary from home too, for those of 
you who are not so adequate in their spelling of words. Yes Chip 
Thompson, I'm talking about someone else, not you." I looked over at 
Chip to see his reaction to Mr. Markson's remark and caught Chip 
mouthing the same statement Mr. Markson had just made. I was starting 
to wonder if Markson had something against Chip. Mr. Markson continued 
on telling us all the new things we were going to be doing and learning 
that year, and as he continued I sat back in my chair and thought; My 
last year in elementary school has officially started.

END OF CHAPTER ONE

Chapter Two As the morning went by slowly

As the morning wore on I was getting restless. All the books that we 
were going to use in Mr. Markson's class had been handed out. We all 
had six books total from Markson plus a notebook and maybe a dictionary 
if the home could afford it for me. It must have been a total of about 
twenty pounds of books I would have to carry back and forth to school 
everyday. Since this classroom was going to be used for adult education 
at night, Markson told us not to leave anything behind. If I had to 
carry a few more pounds of books, I would be carrying half of my 
weight.

I looked up at the clock and it was about lunchtime. I was starving and 
didn't care what they were going to serve us in the cafeteria for lunch 
today. I would eat anything!

Markson had handed us back the cards that he collected earlier that 
morning so we could write down the numbers stamped on our books onto on 
the cards. I was almost done marking down the numbers when the lunch 
bell rang. As I hurried to put my books under my seat, I accidentally 
knocked my history book on the floor between Chip and me. When the book 
hit the floor it made such a loud noise that the classroom quieted down 
immediately.

As I was going to reach down to pick it up, Mr. Markson said to me "Mr. 
James, if that is all it takes to quiet a class down, I think I might 
try that myself next time."

I felt my face getting red and I turned to reach down again for the 
book and it was gone. I looked up the see Chip holding the book out to 
me, with that quaint smile.

"Here you go Cody" Chip said as he handed the book back to me. I said 
"Thanks" as I took the book and stuffed it under my seat.

"What you doing for lunch, Cody" Chip asked.

Chip had just said more than three words in a row to me for the second 
time and I didn't quite know what to say to him.

"Well, I have a lunch ticket from �..home�so I have to eat in the 
cafeteria I guess"

"Mind if I join you?" he asked as he grabbed his lunch bag from under 
his seat.

"I don't think they'll let you into the cafeteria to eat lunch with me 
or that's the way it was at my other school."

"They have an area outside where tickets and baggers can eat together 
Cody."

" Well�I guess so."

I got up from my chair, I grabbed my sweater and tied it around my 
waist. Chip waited for me at the door and as some of the other students 
passed by him, I noticed that he was a little smaller then most of 
them. Not much, but a little.

As I walked to the door, I reached into my pocket to make sure I had my 
lunch ticket, and as I pulled my hand out, I knew my diaper was wet 
again.

When I got outside I asked Chip "What does Markson have against you?"

"Oh, nothing, we just like playing practical jokes on each other every 
now and then. You

see, I had Markson for one week last year when Mrs. Rosen got real sick 
at the start of the school year and they split up our class. I was one 
of five boys that got sent to Markson's class until they found a new 
teacher for our class. One day, I went to his classroom during 
lunchtime and he was writing on the board in the front of the room and 
I saw he was not wearing his rug. I saw his rug on his desk, so, I 
borrowed it!"

"You mean Markson wears a fake hair ?" I asked Chip.

"Yeah" Chip answered. "What about your arm? What happened to it?"

I told Chip the entire story about how I injured my arm and what a pain 
in the ass it was not being able to do a lot of things all the other 
kids do. Chip was asking questions about why I was so small and what 
other schools I went to and before I knew it lunch was over. We 
continued talking all the way back to class. As the afternoon wore on, 
I was thinking to myself 'Maybe this might be a normal school year for 
me'

As the first week of school ended, I found out a lot about Chip, but he 
was always asking things about me that I tried not to answer, like 
where I lived.

It wasn't until the second week that I knew that we were going to 
friends for sure for a long time to come, or at least for the next six 
years, unless I got sent to another foster home or something like that.

I was walking down the hallway to get a drink from the drinking 
fountain when a 6th grade boy stuck his foot out and tripped me. After 
I got up, he pushed me back to the wall and told me that kindergartners 
weren't allowed in this yard, He punched me once in my stomach and as I 
was bent over, Chip came up and gave the kid a hard push almost 
knocking him off his feet.

" What the HELL are you doing Jered, leave him alone!" Chip yelled at 
the kid.

As I was holding my stomach I looked up at Chip. I had never seen an 
expression on his face like that before. Chip looked like he was a 
cornered bobcat, ready to fight or kill. Chip and Jered exchanged a few 
four-letter words and when I thought there was going to be a fight, 
Jered flipped Chip off and walked away. I found out later that Chip and 
Jered lived near each other in a new housing tract that was built about 
five years ago. Jered had a friend that used to live in the house that 
Chip lives in now. I guess Jered blamed Chip and his parents for his 
friend leaving.

As I stood up and got my breath back, Chip noticed a few tears under my 
eyes. All Chip said was "Let's get out of here" and never said anything 
about me nearly crying. After I calmed down a bit I knew that I NEEDED 
to see the nurse. I had crapped in my diaper due to the blow in my 
stomach and I didn't want Chip to find out.

I'm sure some of the students must have known that I was wearing a 
diaper at school, but none of them ever came up to me and accused me of 
wearing one. Chip, I figured knew but never asked me if I was.

Chip always had a way of getting an answer from you with out you 
knowing it, like instead of asking someone how old they were, he would 
ask them what year, month, and day they were born. I always watched 
what I said around him to make sure he didn't find out anything about 
me that I didn't want him to know.

I had poison oak one week and Chip knew about it. The next week I told 
him that my poison oak was finally gone. The day after that Chip asked 
me how my rash was and I told him it was getting better. When I thought 
about it for a moment I think Chip had just got me with his question. I 
had a little diaper rash on my left rear that was being treated with 
medication that had a slight smell to it. ( I found out later that 
Chip's baby brother Bradley had diaper rash too and Chip's mom was 
using the same medicine on him.) Chip didn't mention anything else 
about it.

It wasn't until four weeks later, near the end of October, that Chip 
found out I was living at Mark Allen boy's home. He was always asking 
me if I could come over to his house, or if he could come over to my 
house. I had always told him that I had to be home at a certain time or 
I would get into trouble. I didn't want him to know I resided at Mark 
Allen.

On Oct. 19 I had gotten permission to go to Chips house for the first 
time and I was excited about it. At Mark Allen, you had to get 
permission from your house parent first and then it had to be okayed by 
the cottage counselor (Tommy) and then the superintendent of Mark 
Allen. (Mr. Gee)

Since I had been at Mark Allen, I had been sent to timeout five 
different times for doing something stupid like talking back to Karen 
our house mother in cottage A or for flipping off a recreation leader, 
or for not doing my Saturday chores, so I was surprised when they let 
me go to Chip's house that Saturday.

It was right after I got my chores done that Tommy pulled up in front 
of my cottage in the van. I was on my way out the door when Tommy 
stopped me and asked me if I was dry. I told him I was and let's get 
going, He told me to go back into my room because he wanted to talk to 
me first. I thought something had happened and I wasn't going over to 
Chip's house after all. Tommy sat down on the bed with me and started 
telling me the rules about going off campus to someone's house 
unsupervised. I was not to leave that address under any circumstance 
unless I called Mr. Gee and got his permission. I was not to get into 
any trouble, and that meant no fights. Tommy wanted to make sure I 
understood all the rules or I would not be able to go. When I told him 
I understood the rules, Tommy made me drop my pants to make sure I was 
not wet then Tommy grabbed a empty book bag I had in my closet and went 
over to my dresser and took out two Pampers diapers and a pair of 
plastic pants and put them inside. He put in a shirt on top of the 
diapers and then a pair of pants on top of that. Tommy told me I was to 
change my diaper immediately when it became wet, or soiled. (Tommy was 
also the R.N. at Mark Allen who treated my diaper rash about a week 
earlier and he didn't want me to get a diaper rash again.)

As I got into the van, I notice in black letters on the side of the van 
'MARK ALLEN'.

I knew when Chip saw the van, he would know where I lived. I was pretty 
sure he had an idea by now since he stopped asking me if I lived in a 
house or an apartment awhile back.

The van had a really smooth ride and as Tommy got to the security shed, 
he took out my pass that said I was allowed to leave Mark Allen Boy's 
Home that day after 10 A.M. and be back no later then 4:30 P.M. that 
day. After he showed it to the security guard at the gate, he folded it 
up and had me put it in my pocket.

Whenever Mark Allen had a trip anywhere, or you wanted to go into town 
to buy something, you would have to sign up on a trip sheet. A 
counselor would check the list against another list of boy's names who 
could not go due to bad behavior or if the he still had hours he had to 
work off. I was used to getting about five hours a week to work off 
because of the four letter words I used when I was mad, but somehow I 
had been pretty good the last week and a half

I don't know if I was nervous about meeting Chip's mom or anxious about 
getting away from Mark Allen, but it felt like I had butterflies in my 
stomach.

Chip lived about four blocks from Mark Allen, but the street Mark Allen 
was on was on the backside of the housing tract that Chip lived in. All 
you could see from our street was a cement block wall that was nearly 
one half of a mile long.

I still had butterflies in my stomach as we made a right turn, and 
another quick right turn onto Chip's street. Chip told me his house was 
the forth house from the corner and as I looked at the numbers on the 
houses Tommy stopped at the forth house. I told him it was the right 
one, and as I got out of the van Tommy told me he would be back at 4:15 
P.M. sharp to pick me up.

I looked at Chip's house and it was huge. It was a ranch style like all 
the others along both sides of the street. I walked up the driveway to 
the front door and then turned around and motioned Tommy to leave but 
he sat there in the van waiting for me to go inside. I rang the 
doorbell, and from inside the house I could hear a little boy's voice 
saying "He's Here, He's Here". I knew that voice could only belong to 
Bradley, Chip's three and half year old brother.

Chip opened the door and invited me in. As I went inside, Tommy hit the 
horn on the van twice to let me know he was taking off. As Chip closed 
the door behind me I saw something hanging onto his leg. That something 
was Bradley. He peeked out from behind Chip and said "Hi Cody" in a 
bashful little voice. As I said "Hi" to Bradley I saw he had straight 
hair, cut just like Chip's but his hair was black not brown like 
Chip's. Bradley giggled and ran off to the living room to watch 
cartoons. Chip and I followed and when we got to the living room, I 
could not believe how big it was. It was so specious you could play a 
small game of football in there and watch T.V. at the same.

I tossed my book bag onto the couch as I followed Chip out the sliding 
glass door onto the backyard patio where his mother was working, 
cleaning off the barbeque.

"Mom, This is Cody, he sits in the desk next to me in Markson's class."

"Nice to meet you Cody, Chip has told me so much about you" she said 
"Oh, by the way, I hope you boys want hamburgers for lunch"

Chip and I said "YES" in unison.

I looked beyond the patio and saw a swimming pool with both a diving 
board and slide. I couldn't see how big it was because it had a large 
blue tarp over the top of it. To the right of the pool was a small log 
fort with a swing and a tire swing hanging from it.

"Can we play on the fort later?" I asked.

"Sure, maybe after lunch." Chip said.

"Mom, can Cody and me go swimming later if there's enough time?" Chip 
added.

"Will see"

"Come on Cody, you can see the rest of the house."

Chip took me back into the house and down the hallway. As we went by 
the first opened door Chip told me this was his mother's bedroom. We 
walked to the next door and Chip pushed the door opened and said "and 
this is Bradley's nursery." I looked inside and could tell it was 
Bradley's room from all the toys scattered on the floor. In there was a 
crib in the far left corner of the room, and next to that was a large 
dresser with a changing pad on top. In the far right corner under an 
opened window was a twin size bed with a Winnie the Pooh quilt on top. 
On the right wall was a thirty-two inch screen T.V. Next to that was a 
door that Chip said was Bradley's bathroom. I could smell the scent of 
baby powder in the air in Bradley's room. As we walked further down the 
hall, we walked past a closed door Chip told me that it was another 
bedroom that was being used as a computer room where he did his 
homework and his mother uses for the Internet shopping. We finally came 
to Chip's room, and when we went inside, I couldn't believe how big it 
was. It must have been four times larger than my bedroom at Mark Allen.

There was a large dresser, just like Bradley's, and Chip had a bunk bed 
against the left wall with the same Winnie the Pooh quilts on both the 
top and bottom bunks.

There was another thirty-two inch T.V. with a gaming system hooked up 
to it. Chip had a large bathroom off to the right with both a shower 
and a separate tub with water jets built into it and two sinks side by 
side under a opened window. As we flopped down on his bunk bed I told 
him his house was the biggest one I had ever been in.

Chip asked me what I wanted to do first and I looked down at the game 
system on the floor. We didn't have anything like this at Mark Allen 
because it was not allowed. I always heard the other guys at school 
talking about their high scores on the different games and I had never 
even played it. Chip turned on the T.V. and put a game in as I sat down 
on the carpet in front of the T.V. Chip showed me all the controls and 
explained what they did. Then he showed me what I was to do. The first 
round, Chip wipe me out. I was still trying to get used to the controls 
and trying to remember which button did what. When it was my turn for 
the second round, Chip laid down on the carpet and rested his head on 
his left palm and asked me "What was it like living at Mark Allen Boy's 
Home?"

I stopped playing the game and didn't know what to say to Chip.

"When did you know I was living at Mark Allen" I asked him.

"About the third day of school Cody. I heard you and Miss. Barns 
talking about the cottage you are in. I was in the front office picking 
up Markson's mail for him"

I could feel my face turning red as I thought about what else he may 
have heard that day, and the possibility of Chip hearing any other part 
of that conversation.

" I've been at Mark Allen since the middle of June" I told him.

"Do you like it there?"

"It's okay, I guess, and see not all of the boys living there are as 
bad as you thought we were" I told Chip.

Chip had made a statement to me at the beginning of the school year, 
that all the boys at Mark Allen must have done something bad in order 
to have been sent there.

"Why are you there, Cody?"

"After I hurt my arm, the doctors said I was going to need lots of 
therapy and more surgery. My mom couldn't afford it so she turned me 
over to the child welfare department. She wanted the doctors to do 
everything they could do for me so my arm would get better."

I turned and looked at the T.V. and saw my score was better, but not 
nearly as good as Chip's. As we started the third round, Bradley came 
into the room and watched from behind us. As Chip was playing the game, 
I could smell a foul smell that was coming from Bradley. Bradley walked 
up behind Chip and put his little hand on Chip's shoulder and said 
"Chip, I need to be changed."

"I'm busy, Go ask mom to change you," Chip said.

"Mommy told me to go to you," Bradley said

"In a minute," Chip said as Bradley walked to Chip and sat down in his 
lap.

Chip was having his longest run this time and didn't want to stop for 
anything. Finally about two minutes later, Chip crashed and burned.

"Okay Bradley, lets go and change your diaper. Cody, want to come?"

I didn't answer as I stood up, and then watched as Chip picked Bradley 
up in his arms and walk out of his bedroom with me following them. As 
we entered Bradley's nursery, Chip let Bradley down on his feet, then 
Bradley went to the dresser and climbed up the steps to the top of the 
dresser and lay on his back on the changing pad.

"Little Bradley's in a hurry today," Chip said in a babyish voice as he 
walked over to the dresser. Bradley responded "Cartoons". Chip and I 
knew exactly what Bradley meant.

Chip pulled open the top left dresser drawer and took out one of 
Bradley's diapers and placed it down on the dresser. Chip reached over 
and pulled Bradley's pants down and off him and folded them then put 
them on the dresser. My face turned red when I saw that Bradley was 
wearing the same type of Pampers diapers that I wear. Chip put a 
disposable rubber glove on this hand then pulled the tapes back off the 
diaper and lifted Bradley's legs up and removed the soiled diaper from 
under Bradley. He wrapped the diaper up and disposed of it in the 
diaper pail. Chip pulled out a baby wipe and gently wiped Bradley's 
bottom off until it was clean. He opened up the new diaper, lifted 
Bradley's legs up and slipped the diaper under Bradley's butt.

Every now and then, Chip would make a face at Bradley and Bradley would 
start giggling. As I stood there, I was wondering who was having more 
fun, Chip or Bradley.

I had seen older and younger brothers together before, but most of the 
time they were fighting and could never get along with each other. But 
with Chip and Bradley it was another story. I think Chip liked having 
Bradley around, and I think Bradley liked being around Chip.

Chip took off the glove and threw it in the diaper pail an then pulled 
Bradley's diaper up between his legs an fastened the tapes to the front 
of the diaper. As Bradley sat up, Chip picked him up off the dresser 
and put him down on the floor. Bradley was off like a flash, I guess to 
watch his cartoons.

"You and Bradley get along so good together Chip, most of the brothers 
I know are always fighting or teasing each other," I told him.

"Bradley reminds me so much of my dad," Chip said "Bradley's hair and 
eyes were the same color as my dads."

"By the way Cody, do you need to change yet?"

I stood there stunned when Chip asked me that.

"What do you mean?" I asked him.

"You know, your briefs," Chip said to me as he stared into my eyes.

I didn't know how Chip found out, but I was mad, and upset that my 
best-kept secret, even from Chip wasn't even a secret that I could keep 
from him.

"I..I don't know what you're talking about Chip" hoping my bluff would 
work. "Let's go play Gameboy before it's lunchtime," I told him.

"I knew the first day of school Cody, that you were wearing diapers" 
Chip said "I could smell the plastic pants you had on, the same smell 
as Bradley when he wears plastic pants over his diapers.

I didn't say a thing, I just stood there.

"Cody,"

I looked at Chip again.

"Cody, You don't have to be embarrassed by it. A lot of guys still need 
to wear diapers. When I went to camp last summer, there was a kid there 
that still wore diapers that I knew of, and he really wasn't 
embarrassed by it."

"Well it might not be embarrassing to him, but it sure as hell is for 
me." I told Chip.

"Do you know what its like, to have to wear diapers all of the time, I 
mean, well, you know what I mean, No you wouldn't know" I said.

Chip looked at me again then he reached down to the top dresser drawer 
on the right and pulled it opened. I looked down and saw a stack of 
green disposable diapers in the drawer. I didn't know WHAT to say now, 
I just stared down at the dresser drawer.

"I didn't know, Chip, do you wear diapers too?" I asked him.

"Only if I want to, or when I think I might wet the bed, then I'll put 
one on." Chip said.

"You wet the bed?" I asked.

"Yea, once in a while"

"How come?"

"When my dad was really sick I was having bad nightmares and wetting 
the bed. My mom said I would be screaming in my sleep. She would come 
in and wake me up and hold me until I calmed down and went back to 
sleep. Sometimes she would sleep in a chair next to my bed just in 
case. About two days before my dad died, I asked my mom to take me to 
the hospital so I could see him. My mom wouldn't take me because my dad 
was real bad. He was in a coma and hooked up to machines. Mom didn't 
want me to get upset seeing my dad like that. The night that she didn't 
take me to see him I cried until I fell asleep. When I woke up, my bed 
was wet again. My mom said it was an accident, Two days after my dad 
died, I had another accident and mom took me to see a doctor. The doc 
said it was probably due to the stress I was feeling about losing my 
dad. The doctor thought it would be a good idea for me to wear a diaper 
at night until I got over it. When I wore a diaper at night, I would 
wake up in a dry bed in the morning. If I didn't wear a diaper one 
night, my bed would be wet the next morning. My mom then took me to a 
psychologist and he told my mom to let me wear them anytime I thought I 
needed them.

"So you wear them to bed every night now?" I asked Chip.

"No, I only wear them when I feel I might need them" Chip answered.

"Do you ever wear them to school Chip?"

"Once in a while. You remember the day that Jared socked you in the 
stomach, I was wearing a diaper that day."

"Why?" I asked Chip.

"The day before, mom, Bradley and I went to visit my dads grave. When 
we got home, I came in here and lay down on the bed and started crying. 
Mom came in and tried to comfort me, but I just kept on crying. I miss 
my dad so much. Mom lead me to the dresser and helped me up and then 
she took my pants and underwear off and put a diaper on me, like she 
does Bradley. She put me into the bed and sat there until I went to 
sleep. When I woke up the next morning, I was still feeling bad so mom 
had me go to the bathroom and when I was done she diapered me again. 
She thought I might feel better at school wearing 'My comfort pants' as 
my mom calls them now. I did feel a lot better until Jared tripped you 
that day."

"That's why I saw the expression on your face."

"What expression?" Chip asked.

"You looked like you were going to kill Jared. When you guys started 
cussing at each other, I looked up at you and you were mad, and the 
expression on your face, I can't even describe it"

"You remember when we walked away from Jared that day, I hate to tell 
you now, but, I had wet myself."

I looked at Chip and we both started laughing.

"Guess what Chip. When Jared socked me in the stomach, he knocked the 
crap right out of me" I said "My diaper was full, both sides."

When Chip heard that, we couldn't stop laughing and when we tried, all 
we had to do was look at each other and we were laughing even harder. 
We both ended up on our backs on the twin bed, holding our sides. I 
thought my sides were going to split, and I was never going to stop 
laughing. As we laid there trying to control our laughter, Chip asked 
me that question that I hoped I would never hear him ask, "Why did I 
have to wear diapers."

I told him about the accident I had at Oak Grove Children's Home. How I 
was run over by the flat bed truck, and that the doctor said he thought 
it was probably spinal cord shock at first and then he thought a nerve 
might have been crushed or cut and that they hoped it may heal by 
itself. When I told Chip that it happened three years ago, right before 
school started, he realized that his dad had just died about one month 
after my accident. We laid there in silence for a couple of minutes, I 
guess Chip was thinking about his father, but I

was thinking about how my life was changed drastically for the second 
time in my short life, so far.

I was getting hungry and I knew that after that laughing episode that 
my diaper was probably soaked, but I didn't know what to say, or how to 
say it to Chip.

"Chip, you remember what you asked me after Bradley left the room?"

"Huh?" Chip answered.

"Do you remember what you asked me after Bradley left the room to watch 
his cartoons?" I asked Chip again.

"Oh, you need to change?"

"I think all that laughing did me in. Where can I change." I asked.

"Chip sat up on the bed and said "I know the perfect place, HERE!."

"Do you think your mom would mind?"

"No."

"When Mark Allen called to make sure it was okay for you to come over 
today, they told my mom about your special needs and she understood. 
Besides, she has changed a lot of diapers over the last few years and 
she is used to it" Chip said.

"I don't need to be cleaned, all I need to do is dump one and put on 
another one" I told him.

"Let me tell my mom" Chip said.

"I'm going to get my book bag off the couch, I'll be right back" I told 
Chip.

As I left Bradley's nursery, Chip stuck his head out the door into the 
hallway and yelled:

"Mom, Cody needs,�.you know what"

"Chip I'm kind of busy, can you help him?"

"Okay mom"

"You two had better hurry up, the hamburgers are almost ready."

"Okay mom"

"If you two aren't here pretty soon, I'm going to feed them to the 
dog!"

"Mom"

"Yes Chip"

"We don't have a dog"

"Remind me to put it on the shopping list for tomorrow."

"Doggie, we gonna get doggie?" Bradley said as he went running out 
through the opened sliding glass door to his mother.

I grabbed my book bag off the couch and headed back to Bradley's room. 
I then realized this would be the first time that someone other than an 
adult has ever helped me change or changed my diaper.

The first time I wore a diaper came back to my mind so clearly, so 
clearly like it was just yesterday. I remember waking up the day after 
I was run over by the truck, and I was cold, really, really cold. The 
nurse had pulled my gown up and was taking the catheter out of my penis 
and it hurt really badly. I remember her telling me she was trying not 
to hurt me. "It will be over in a minute babe, and then we'll get you 
dressed and you can go back to sleep" I watched as she took a diaper 
off the cart and put it on me. I wanted to tell her I wasn't a baby and 
did not want to wear a diaper, but I was so tired, I just went back to 
sleep. Seems like it was just yesterday.

As I walked back into Bradley's room, I saw Chip standing by the 
dresser, his back was towards me. He had one of Bradley's diapers in 
his hands and it looked like he was studying it for some reason.

"Chip" I said quietly

Chip turned around quickly and saw me standing there, the diaper still 
in his hand.

"You know Cody�. Bradley was only three months old when my dad died. I 
think I've changed Bradley about a thousand times since then"

I could tell by the expression on Chip's face that he was missing his 
dad right now.

"Yea,�. I can still remember my real dad� I remember him taking me to 
the park when I was about three, I guess� That's about all I can 
remember bout him." I told Chip.

"Yea" Chip said as he put the diaper on the dresser.

"How did your father die" I asked Chip as I walked over to the dresser.

"Don't know�The doctors said it was a lung infection of some kind"

"Boys, are you finished yet?" Chip's mom yelled at us from the back 
patio door.

"Be right there mom" Chip yelled back.

"How do we do this?" I asked Chip as I felt my face start turning red 
again.

"Same way I do Bradley" Chip shot back.

"Are you going to make faces at me too?"

"Only if you want me to."

I turned my back to the dresser and did a little jump and sit as I 
landed on the dresser.

I placed my book bag on the dresser and opened it up. As I fumbled 
around inside I told Chip: "You know the diapers Bradley wears,�.well I 
kind of� wear the same ones I guess."

Chip looked surprised at me for a second and then said: "I thought your 
waist and Bradley's were about the same size."

"Yea�.but I'm about nine inches taller than him" I told Chip.

"But your about nine inches shorter than me"

I found one of the Pamper diapers and took it out. When Chip saw it he 
looked at the other diaper on the dresser like he was comparing them 
together. I braced myself with my left hand as I brought my legs up, 
and turned myself so my feet were up on the table. I laid back on the 
dresser and adjusted my position so my body was in the middle of the 
changing pad. I fumbled with my belt as I unfastened it and then pushed 
my pants down almost to my knees. Chip reached over and took hold of my 
plastic pants at the waist and tried to pull them down my legs.

"You're going to have to lift you skinny ass so I can get these down." 
Chip said.

"You know something Chip, you're going to make a great mother when you 
grow up!"

I pulled the tape off on each side of the diaper and lifted my rear up 
as I pulled the diaper out from under me. Chip opened the new diaper, 
and as I lifted my butt up he put it under my rear. I reached down and 
pulled the front of the diaper up between my legs and as I held it in 
place, Chip peeled the tape back and fastened it to the front of the 
diaper one side then the other side. I sat up and swung my legs out 
over the side of the dresser and hopped down to the floor. I managed to 
pull my plastic pants back up over the diaper followed by my pants. 
Chip helped me by fastening my belt together. I took my wet diaper, 
rolled it up and folded it before I tossed it into the diaper pail. I 
turned back to the dresser and started zipping my book bag closed when 
Chip tapped me on the shoulder and as I turned, I saw a diaper in his 
hand.

"Cody, you better put this back inside your bag since you didn't use 
it"

I looked at him for a moment as I wondered what he was talking about.

"My mom buys the size six Pampers for Bradley too, and since you wear 
the same size as him I thought you wouldn't mind"

It just hit me. Chip had slipped one of Bradley's diapers under me 
instead of one that I brought with me.

"Your gonna get it, Chip" I said

Chip had that 'What did I do' face on him.

Chip was the first to leave Bradley's room with me hot on his heels.

Chips mom was a real good cook. I told her, her hamburgers were a lot 
better than McDonalds. I had downed three hamburgers and a helping of 
her potato salad. Bradley ate about half of a hamburger and some potato 
salad. Chip kept pace with me until my third burger.

After we had eaten, we played out in the back yard on the fort until it 
was almost time for me to go back to Mark Allen.

Chip and I snuck back into his room and tried to get some more gaming 
in before I left. As I sat there watching Chip take his turn, his 
mother came in and asked me if I needed to be changed before I left. I 
rocked side to side testing my diaper before answering her that I was 
fine. About ten after four, I heard Tommy honk the horn on the van 
twice. I looked at Chip and I think he saw the tears start welling up 
in my eyes as we got up off the floor. I grabbed my book bag off of 
Chip's bunk bed and made my way to the front door with Chip following 
close behind. Chip's mom was holding Bradley when I got to the front 
door. I turned and looked at Chip.

"See you in school Monday" I said as I punched him lightly in the arm.

Chip returned my punch.

I turned to Chip's mom and Bradley and thanked her for the Great lunch 
and told her I had a Great time here. I also reminded her to pick up 
you know what tomorrow for you know who.

Bradley gave me a kiss on my cheek. As I left, I could feel myself 
start to cry.

I hadn't had such a good time in a long time. As I climbed into the 
van, Tommy hit the horn twice as we took off.

"Have a good time Cody?" Tommy asked me.

I didn't answer him because I thought I was going to start bawling like 
a little kid. It was quiet the rest of the ride back to Mark Allen Boys 
Home.

END OF CHAPTER TWO

CHAPTER THREE
My Stay At The Infirmary

FOR MORE INFO ON THIS STORY PLEASE
READ INTRO TOP OF CHAPTER ONE

As Tommy dropped me off in front of cottage-A, he knew I was hurting 
deep down inside.

"Cody, going to be a good meal tonight in the mess hall. They are 
having fried chicken, and I know you love fried chicken."

All I could say to Tommy and still keep from crying was: "Thanks for 
the lift"

I opened the front door of my cottage and walked inside. As I passed 
the T.V. room I saw most of the guys were in there watching T.V. I made 
my way to my room, and closed the door behind me. Karen, our 
housemother didn't like it when we closed our doors to our rooms but 
the way I was feeling, I didn't care. The doors couldn't be locked, but 
I guess she thought we were up to something when we had the door 
closed. I went and lay down on my bed and started thinking about Chip 
and how I wished I had a brother like him. Bradley was still too young 
to understand what a good relationship that he and Chip had together. 
And his mom, she had a good a sense of humor, and in my eyes, is a 
Great cook. My eyes slowly closed as I went to sleep thinking about 
Chip.

I was awoken by the sound of the dinner bell. I had been here at the 
boys home over four months now and I could not get used to that damn 
bell. It was the same type that they use at school, but this one was 
mounted in the hallway of our cottage. It rang every morning at six 
A.M. to get us up from bed. Then again at six-twenty-five to tell us we 
should be heading to the dinning hall for breakfast. It rang again at 
eleven-fifty-five A.M. to tell us it was time for lunch. The last time 
of the day it rang was at five-twenty-five P.M.., dinner time. Most of 
the times it rang, I was always ready to eat, but not this time. I was 
still full from the hamburgers I had at Chip's house for lunch.

I got up off the bed and walked out of my bedroom. At the back door of 
cottage-A the other guys were lining up getting ready to go over to the 
dinning hall for dinner. I joined them and when we all were in line, we 
left the cottage and walked down the path single file to the dinning 
hall. Karen, our house mom, would always bring up the rear so she could 
keep an eye on us.

As I looked at the other boys in front of me, I saw the two who were 
taller than me. Both of them were eight years old, and one was only one 
half inch taller then me. The other one was one and a half inches 
taller. His name was Mohammed.

Mohammed liked to play sports, especially soccer. When summer was 
almost over, we had a swim meet, and Mohammed won the third grade and 
under classification. He is a good swimmer.

Me, on the other hand, I could just barely keep my head above water. 
With my right arm screwed up I felt more like an anchor. Toss me into a 
pool and I could tell you were the bottom of the pool was in a matter 
of seconds. Tommy was teaching me how to use other parts of my body to 
help me swim and I liked Tommy for that. He was kind of like a big 
brother or sometimes even like a father to me.

When we entered the dining hall, we went to the seats that were 
assigned to us. There were four boys to a table and four tables to a 
group, or cottage. I sat at table one with Randy, Mark, and Carl. Randy 
and Mark are six years old, and Carl is seven.

Karen thought since I was thirteen years old now they would look up to 
me, and learn some good table manners, but I think she was wrong. It 
seemed like I was the one who needed to be taught some table manners.

We sat there about two minutes before Roy the head cook came out and 
motioned for us to come an get our food. Being in cottage-A meant we 
were first in line of everyone to get our food.

We go in one door and pick up a plate and walk down the line. When we 
want something we hold our plate out and they would put the food on our 
plates, then we continue down the line. As we exit the other door, we 
pick up our silverware and a cup for milk. All the boys in cottage-A 
have to use a little plastic cup, and weren't allowed to use the larger 
glasses. The larger glasses are only to be used by the adults and the 
boys in cottage B and higher. When all the boys were back at my table, 
I would help pour their milk for them since I was thirteen years old. 
Karen would pour the milk for the other two tables before she could eat 
her meal. Sometimes one of the other cottage parents will eat with 
Karen, but she never leaves her table to eat with someone else. I guess 
she does not trust a bunch of six, seven, and eight year olds and now a 
thirteen year old.

I didn't really feel like eating tonight, so I settled for a piece of 
chicken and some fries.

When Roy saw me about to leave the kitchen line with what I had on my 
plate, he stopped me to find out if I was wasn't feeling okay. I told 
him about the lunch I had at Chip's house and he understood.

I liked Roy, he was short like me, but not as short, and he was husky. 
I guess he was about five foot four inches tall.

I met Roy the first week I was at Mark Allen when I had been given 
three hours to work off because of bad behavior. I worked them off in 
the kitchen washing dishes and wiping down the tables. I had worked the 
last of some other hours I still had for talking back to Karen 
yesterday in the kitchen after school so I could go over to Chip's 
house today. I guess Roy knew that I wanted to go to Chip's house, so 
he found some work for me to do.

I tried to eat some chicken, but I think I played more with it instead.

It was about ten of six when Randy was finished eating. No one in our 
cottage was allowed to leave their table until everyone was done 
eating, and the last one was usually Randy.

Randy was only five years old when he came to Mark Allen. He was more 
like me, but in a smaller form. He'd prefer to watch the other guys 
playing then participate, and he was skinny like me, and he doesn't 
talk very much. I think something happened to him while he was growing 
up.

Randy won't bathe unless Karen is there with him. She tried to get him 
to use the shower but he wouldn't do it, so Karen gave up and now gives 
him a bath every morning before breakfast. He's usually in line ahead 
of me at night when we are getting diapered for bed. Most of the boys 
leave him alone and I think Randy likes it that way. I kind of felt 
sorry for him.

When we left the dinning hall Karen asked me if I needed to be changed. 
I was wet but I figured I could wait until shower time, which was in 
about one hour.

All the boys in cottage-A had to be inside the cottage no later then 
six-forty-five P.M. The only exception was if you were sick and in the 
infirmary.

I always tried to take my shower at about six-forty-five so the other 
boys weren't around to see me naked. I felt embarrassed every time one 
of them did see me. They would start asking me questions about my body 
that I didn't know how to answer. When my social worker and Mr. Gee 
thought it would be a good idea for me to be living with boys more my 
own physical size, they probably didn't realize that I was more 
different then a six, seven, or eight year old. My voice had not 
changed yet, and I didn't have hair in my arm pits or around my penis 
yet. My penis was about the same size as theirs but I had a very small 
sack under it.

I was nine when I was taken to see the doctor to find out why I was 
growing more slowly than other boys my own age. The doctor said it was 
due to the accident with my arm, and my body sensed the injury and 
started attempting to make repairs on my arm. Most of my growth had 
slowed down or even stopped. He said with luck, I would possibly end up 
being, maybe five foot to hopefully five foot five inch tall by the 
time I stopped growing altogether. I guess I was not going to be a 
basketball star, but I didn't really like to play basketball any way.

I opened the back door of my cottage and walked in. As I walked down 
the hall to my room, I could hear some of the other boys rough housing 
in the T.V. room. I knew if they were caught by Karen they would be in 
trouble. I got to my room and sat on my bed, drawing my legs up so I 
could rest my chin on my knees. I stared at the empty bed across from 
me and wondered if the bed was ever going to be used. It was the last 
bed at Mark Allen that wasn't being used yet. Tomorrow was Sunday and 
that meant we had to go to church. All of us boys in cottage-A had to 
go to church. The other boys in the other cottages got to decide for 
themselves whether or not to go.

I looked over at the window in my room and watched the other boys 
playing on the swings and jungle gym set outside. I was wondering who 
was going to get into a fight as I sat there. As I was watching them 
Tommy walked past.

Tommy was almost six foot tall and he has medium brown hair parted down 
the middle. Tommy was only working at Mark Allen until he graduated 
from collage. He said it was good experience for him as he was studying 
to be a child psychologist. He was also into electronics. He liked to 
design circuits on his computer and then build them out of electronic 
parts to see if they worked. I kind of like messing around with old 
radios that didn't work anymore like he did.

I heard two rapid knocks on my opened door. I turned to see where they 
came from. Tommy was standing there with a smile on his face.

"Eh, Cody, Want to come back to my room, I have a new circuit I want to 
show you."

"I don't think so�.. I was going to get ready to take a shower before 
the other guys." I said.

"You sure,? The circuit I found can make all kinds of sounds, even a 
train whistle!"

"Naw, not now"

"What's the matter, Cody?"

"Ah. Nothing, I guess I'm just tired."

Tommy came into the room and sat down beside me on the bed.

"You can tell me Cody"

"I've just thinking about ��.

I started softly crying as Tommy reached for me and pulled my head to 
his chest and softly starting rubbing my back.

"Why�why do I have to be � here?" I asked Tommy.

"I don't know, Cody, I just don't know."

Tommy was running his fingers thru my curly hair trying to comfort me.

" Why�couldn't I have been...just�just normal,..like�like everyone 
else?" I asked him between my sobs.

"No one is really normal, Cody, we are all different in some ways."

I continued crying softly as Tommy sat there holding me close like a 
father would hold his own son.

"Feeling better Cody?" Tommy asked me after a few minutes.

"A little" I said as I sat there wiping the tears from my eyes.

"I don't work tomorrow or Monday Cody, maybe you can stop by my room 
after church tomorrow and check out the new circuit with me then?"

"I guess so" I said to Tommy.

Tommy got up and walked to the door, "Cheer up a little Cody, Halloween 
is less then two weeks away!" he said then he left my room.

I reached down and pulled the Velcro straps loose on my shoes and 
lightly kicked the shoes off my feet. I pulled my socks off and dropped 
them on my shoes and then pushed the shoes under my bed with my feet. 
As I stood up I looked out the window and it was starting to get dark 
outside now. As I looked out the window I took my shirt off with my 
left hand and tossed it on the empty bed across from me, and then 
walked to the foot of my bed and stood on the plastic bed pad on the 
floor. I unfastened my belt, then my pants and let them fall down to my 
ankles. I kicked my pants off the pad so they wouldn't get wet when I 
took my diaper off. I reached down and pushed my plastic pants all the 
down then stepped out of them. I stood there for a minute looking at 
the Pampers diaper I still had on remembering the trick Chip had played 
on me that morning. As I looked down at the white cover and the babyish 
print on the waistband I realized that my waist was only about an inch 
more than Bradley's, according to where the tapes were attached on my 
diaper, but then I remembered that Bradley still had baby fat on him. I 
pulled the left tape loose and let the diaper fall. I picked it up and 
rolled it up against my bare leg before I tossed it in the trashcan at 
the foot of the unused bed. I walked over to the door and peeked out 
into the hall to make sure the hallway was clear of the other boys. 
When I was sure I could make it to the bathroom without being seen by 
the other boys I walked the twenty feet or so to the bathroom.

I didn't like Karen's rule of no clothes at all in the shower and bath 
area. She said she made the rule because she didn't like picking up wet 
clothes and having to wring the water out of them. And all of the clean 
dry towels were to be picked up in the shower bath area and used in 
that area only, and when you were done using them you put them in the 
metal hamper there. No towels were to leave the area under any 
circumstance. She didn't want to have to hunt them down later in our 
bedrooms. There were always three stacks of towels on the end of 
counter, more then enough if you needed more than one after you were 
done with your bath or shower. As I passed by I grabbed a towel and 
walked by the two bathtubs that were on my left. I passed the first 
shower stall and went for the second one. This one was more out of view 
than the first shower stall was. I reached up and turned on the hot 
water first and then turned on the cold water to adjust the 
temperature. I let the water run down my back for a long time before I 
picked up the bottle of baby wash and squeezed some on my shoulders 
until it was running down my stomach. I quickly rubbed it all over 
myself paying more attention on washing my diaper area, both front and 
back. It had a baby smell to it but that never bothered me. I placed 
the bottle back on the shelf and then let the water slowly rinse me 
off. I was feeling a lot better now, I guess because I was clean now.

I heard two boys coming into the bathroom and listened to see if they 
were coming to take a bath or shower or use the toilet. Just as I heard 
the shower go on next to me, one boy walked over and asked me if I was 
done yet? I reached up and turned the water off and took the towel off 
the towel bar and wrapped it around my waist.

"You can use it now Justin, I'm done" I told him as I walked past him.

I guess I was getting used to being seen naked now by the other boys. 
If Justin would have done that to me two weeks ago I think I would have 
freaked. I took the towel off and finished drying myself near the towel 
hamper. I dropped the towel in and walked back to my room.

After my shower, I put on a pair of plastic and terry training pants 
along with a long tee shirt and went to watch T.V. until Karen was 
ready to dress us for bed. That was usually right after seven P.M. She 
always used cloth diapers on us because they could be washed, and were 
a lot cheaper to use then the disposable diapers.

I had been at Mark Allen about two weeks when one boy from our cottage 
got to go home for good. The next day Andre moved in and took his place 
in room number two. Karen had read his file and knew he wet the bed. 
When Karen took him thru the cottage explaining the rules, she showed 
him the laundry room that also doubled as the dressing, diapering room. 
When Andre heard her say diaper, he said no one was going to put a 
diaper on him! Karen told him that a lot of boys in our cottage needed 
some protection at night for bedwetting. Andre said again no one was 
going to make him wear a diaper, ever! That night at seven, Karen said 
"It's time for some you guys to get dressed for bed" All six of us went 
our rooms and took off everything but our shirts then we walked back to 
the laundry room and lined up wearing only our shirts. Andre watched us 
from the T.V. room. After Karen put a diaper on us, we walked back into 
the T.V. room wearing only a tee shirt, diapers and plastic pants!

We sat down and watched T.V. The next morning, Andre's bed was wet, and 
Karen helped him change his sheets. That night, Karen had us do the 
same thing, and Andre watched again as we were diapered and then went 
in to watch T.V. The morning after that, Andre's bed was wet again. 
That night we did the same thing, except this time Andre was the last 
one in the line, wearing only a tee shirt like us. I guess Karen's 
child psychology worked on Andre.

When it was time for us to get diapered, Karen would always say 
'dressed for bed'. She never said to us that it was time to get our 
diapers on. That was one thing I liked about her.

At night now there are seven boys who wore a diaper to bed, me 
included.

About seven-thirty we had a small snack, and at eight we were in bed.

Bedtime was at eight sharp. Monday through Sunday. No exceptions. Even 
during summer, bedtime in cottage-A was eight P.M.!

When I first moved into cottage-A at Mark Allen, some of the boys would 
tease me about having to wear diapers all the time. I was the same size 
as most of them, but I was a hell of a lot smarter than they were. The 
teasing had just about stopped about a week later. (Use your 
imagination to figure it out)

It was now eight o clock, and as we walked by the little kitchen in the 
cottage, we put our ice cream bowls and spoons in the sink on our way 
to our bedrooms.

I pulled the sheet and blanket down on my bed and crawled in. I hit the 
snooze button on my clock radio that was sitting on my chair near the 
head of my bed. As I adjusted my pillow, Karen came in and told me good 
night. She turned the bedroom light off and went down the hall to the 
next bedroom. Our bedroom doors were always left opened in case one of 
us needed to use the bathroom or if someone was having a nightmare. 
Karen could hear them and come to our room to wake us up. After the 
last goodnight, she would turn off half the hallway lights.

I lay there thinking what Tommy had said to me about his new electronic 
circuit. I think I will stop by his room after church tomorrow and 
check it out I thought as I went to sleep

The bell was ringing again. I looked at my clock radio, and it was six 
A.M. I stretched my arms and then rubbed my eyes trying to wake up. 
Karen walked in and turned the light on in my room.

"Time to get up Cody" Karen said as she left my room.

I turned onto my back and stared at the ceiling for a few moments. I 
knew I needed to take a shower so I wouldn't smell like pee during 
church. I climbed out of bed and as my feet hit the floor, I could tell 
it was going to be winter soon. It had been really hot most of 
September, and most of October it was still warm, but this morning, I 
was cold! I got up and walked to the plastic bed pad and pulled my 
plastic pants down. I undid the diaper pin holding my diaper on me and 
let the wet diaper plopped to the floor. I did one more long stretch 
with my arm as I walked out my door and was on my way to the shower. I 
knew that I only had about five minutes in the shower before Karen 
expected me on the changing table. I washed only my diaper area this 
time. As I turned off the shower I could feel the cold hitting me. 
After I dried myself off, I put the towel in the hamper and then walked 
down the hall to the dressing room. I turned on the light in the room 
and as I entered I called out to Karen that I was ready.

I got up on the dressing table and laid on my back, like I've done so 
many times before. Karen finally walked in about two minutes later. I 
raised my rear so she could slip the two cloth diapers under me. She 
sprinkled baby powder on her hand and rubbed it on my rear. I let my 
rear down as Karen sprinkled more baby powder on my penis and rubbed 
that in. As she pulled the cloth diapers up between my legs and pin 
them together, she said "Cody, are you coming down with something?" I 
yawned as I shook my head 'No' Karen took out a pair of plastic pants 
from the drawer under the table and put them on over my feet and 
started slipping them up my legs. "Cody, you feel like you have a 
temperature"

"I'm okay" I said as I lifted my rear one last time so she could get 
the plastic pants up over my diapers.

"You stay here Cody, I'll be right back"

I lay back down on the table and waited for Karen to return.

She returned a few moments later with the digital thermometer in her 
hand. She pulled the protective cover off the tip and placed the tip in 
my mouth. "It should take about a minute Cody"

I continued laying there, looking at the way I was laying.

Bradley looked just like this yesterday right after Chip changed his 
diaper I thought. My legs were spread apart due to the diapers, but 
this time my heels were pulled up closer to my rear end this time. I 
must look like a extra large Bradley I thought to myself, just then I 
felt a chill down my back.

The thermometer beeped and Karen took it out of my mouth and read the 
temperature.

"Cody, your temperature is one hundred three. You're going to the 
infirmary right now. I want you to go put on your shirt and pants, and 
don't forget socks and shoes."

I climbed off the table and went to my room.

I reached down into the bottom drawer of the dresser and took out my 
cargo pants. I liked these pants the best because there was no snaps 
for me to mess with. They had an elastic waist, so all I had to do was 
step into them and pull them on. Tommy found these pants at Sears for 
me.

The first week I was at Mark Allen, I had two pair of pants, some 
shorts and a couple of shirts to my name. Tommy called Sears and 
explained the situation I was in and talked them into making a donation 
to Mark Allen boys home. Sears called back two days later and the 
manager of the store wanted Tommy to bring me to see him. Tommy picked 
me up at my cottage the next morning in his car, and we drove up to 
Sears. It felt weird going into a store that wasn't open yet for the 
day. It was eight o clock in the morning and Sears didn't open up till 
ten A.M. When we went in the store the manager, Mr. Barbour was there 
to meet us. He shook my hand and asked me some questions. When Mr. 
Barbour and I were thru talking, Mr. Barbour told Tommy to pick out 
five pair of pants, six shirts, some socks, a pair of shoes, and some 
underwear for this fine young lad. (His exact words) Tommy had to 
explained the situation about the underwear and Mr. Barbour let Tommy 
pick out another pair of pants for me instead. I never had so many new 
clothes all at one time like that in my life. When we were about to 
leave, Mr. Barbour gave Tommy a check as a donation to Mark Allen boys 
home too. The last pair of pants Tommy picked were the cargo pants I'm 
wearing now. When Tommy was looking for my pants, he kept looking for 
size eight-husky. When I told Tommy I wasn't husky, he said the husky 
size would hide my diapers better at school and I would look in fashion 
at school. More bad and rad, as Tommy put it.

"Ready Cody?"

I looked up to see Mohammed standing at my door.

"In a minute" I told him.

One of the rules here at Mark Allen was: If you were sick, and you had 
to go to the infirmary, someone had to walk with you to make sure you 
got there okay. I thought it was a dumb rule, especially here at 
cottage-A. If you open a window in cottage-A and spit, it would hit the 
infirmary. Cottage-A was that close. Karen told us later the reason for 
the rule was because a boy from one of the other cottages was on his 
way to the infirmary when he passed out. Another boy found him and 
managed to get him over to the infirmary.

I pulled yesterday's shirt on and stepped into my shoes. I didn't even 
strap the Velcro closures. As I got up, I felt a little lightheaded.

I followed Mohammed down the hallway to the back door of the cottage. 
Mohammed hit the cross bar hard, that opened the door. The door swung 
opened as far as it could go. I followed Mohammad out the door. As we 
walked the path to the infirmary Mohammed said: "Looks like you're 
getting out of church today Cody"

"Yea"

As we got to the front door of the infirmary , the breakfast bell rang. 
Mohammed opened the door wide trying to avoid me and the germs I might 
be carrying. I walked to the partially open door to the office and 
lightly knocked twice.

"See you later Cody, I'm going to breakfast" Mohammed said as he closed 
the infirmary door behind him.

"Come in" Sherry said.

I pushed the door open a little further as I went into the office.

"I�I was sent here" I said.

"And what seems to be the problem?"

"Karen said I have a temperature"

'What is your name?"

"Cody"

"Cody ?"

"Cody James"

"And what cottage are you from?"

"Cottage-A"

"Okay Cody, Why don't you go into the examination room and climb up on 
the table and I'll be right with you"

"Okay"

I first saw Sherry the second week I was at Mark Allen. I had a small 
cold, so Karen sent me to the infirmary.

It was the first time I had been in the infirmary and didn't know what 
to expect. I was surprised when I saw Tommy working here. Tommy found 
out I didn't have a file at the infirmary yet so I ended up answering a 
lot of questions: What's your full name?, What cottage are you in?, how 
old are you?

When I said twelve, Tommy stopped writing and looked at me and then 
repeated the question again, "How old�are you?"

"Twelve"

Tommy looked at me as he asked, "Are you really twelve Cody?"

"Yes" Then I went into explaining to him, Why I was in cottage-A. When 
I was about finished telling Tommy the story, Sherry walked in. Sherry 
had a sweet, soft voice. She told Tommy she needed to get some papers 
from the filing cabinet in the front office. Tommy and Sherry went into 
the other office and I could hear them kissing. Sherry had to leave, 
and when Tommy came back into the room, I asked him: "Is she good?"

"What"

"Is she a good kisser?"

Tommy turned bright red.

"Are you allergic to anything?"

"Nope"

"Do you wet the bed?"

"Only when I want too."

That's how Tommy found out I wore diapers twenty-four hours a day.

When I got to the table, I looked around the room for a step stool or 
something I could use to climb up on the table.

"Oh. Cody, let me help you"

Sherry reached down, picked me up and sat me on the table.

"Here Cody, let's take your temperature"

I opened my mouth.

"No Cody, I just need you to turn your head."

I turned my head and Sherry put the tip of what looked like the thing 
the doctors use when they check your ears.

"Cody, you do have a temperature, one hundred two. Looks like your 
going to be staying here for a couple of days."

I just sat there wondering if I would be going back to school soon. I 
never wanted to go to school before, until I met Chip. I thought the 
other guys who couldn't wait for school to start were sick. Real sick. 
Me on the other hand couldn't wait for school to end. I'd be out. I'd 
be free, or almost free to do what 'I' wanted to do. But now it seemed 
strange, I would miss going to school tomorrow for some reason.

"Cody, I don't mean to embarrass you, but I need to get you undressed 
so I can check you for any rashes or tick bites�..Is that okay with 
you?"

I nodded my head yes.

I raised my arms up, my right arm as high as I could as Sherry took my 
shirt off. As she reached for my shoes, I tilted my feet and my shoes 
slipped off and dropped to the floor.

"Okay Cody, lets get those feet up and you lay back so I can get those 
pants off."

As she pulled my pants down my legs I was waiting to see the expression 
on her face when she saw that I was wearing a diaper,

"Are you still dry Cody?"

I slowly shook my head yes.

"You just lay there while I check your legs for any bites or rashes, 
Okay"

I shook my head yes again.

Sherry lifted my right leg first, checking underneath and then both 
sides as she held it up in the air. Sherry placed my leg back down and 
lifted my other leg checking it underneath and then the sides.

"Your legs are okay Cody, now, I need you to sit up and let your legs 
over the side so I can check your sides and back."

I turned and let my legs dangle over the side of the table. As I sat 
there, Sherry checked my sides and back with both, her eyes and hand.

"Can't see any rashes or bites, so it looks like you might have a touch 
of the flu."

I didn't want to be sick right now, I wanted��.

"Let me get a quick listen to your lungs Cody" Sherry said as she 
placed the stethoscope on my back.

"Did you bring any pajamas with you Cody?"

"No"

"I think we can find some for you to wear. You stay right here, Cody, 
I'll be right back."

I sat there on the table swinging my legs back and forth and watched as 
my plastic pant puff up and down as my legs moved.

"Cody, I found two pair of pajamas in your size. Do you want to wear 
the two piece ski pajamas or the blanket sleeper?"

I stopped swinging my legs when she said 'Blanket Sleeper'

The last time I wore a blanket sleeper was when I was at Oak Grove 
children's home. I liked that blanket sleeper because it kept me warm, 
real warm. I was so skinny and was always cold.

"Who's here?" I asked Sherry

"You're the only one in the infirmary right now Cody."

"Can I wear the sleeper?"

"Sure Cody"

Sherry placed the ski pajamas on the table beside me, then unfolded the 
blanket sleeper, pulled the zipper down and help me get my feet into 
it. She pulled it up my legs until my feet were in the feet of the 
sleeper. She placed her hands on my waist and I put my hand on her 
shoulder as she helped me down to the floor. Sherry pulled the sleeper 
up and helped me get my arms in the sleeves, then zipped it up to my 
neck and snapped the tab closed over the zipper. I felt like a little 
kid as I stood there looking down at this red blanket sleeper. I'm sure 
Sherry saw my red face, but I really didn't mind, I was warm now. 
Sherry held my hand and led me down the hallway to the first room on 
the right. As we entered, she turned the light on and I could see there 
were four hospital beds in the room. Sherry took me to the first bed 
and lowered the safety rail on the side of the bed and helped me climb 
in and under the sheet and blanket. Sherry walked over to the 
television and took the remote control off the top of the T.V. and 
handed it to me.

"Cody, I'll be leaving to go eat breakfast in a few minutes, and if you 
need me for an emergency while I'm gone, just press the red button here 
on the side of the bed. Remember, for an emergency only! Do you 
understand?"

"Yes" I said, then Sherry said "Hope you feel better soon Cody" as she 
walked out of the room.

Here I was, in bed, with my own T.V.. Now I didn't have anyone around 
me telling me they wanted to watch something else. I was tired of 
watching all those crappy programs that Karen would select for us to 
watch. No more BARNEY! I channel surfed for awhile before I settled on 
Tom and Jerry. As I lay there my back and my legs were starting to 
ache. I turned over on my stomach and slowly went to sleep.

"Cody��.Cody��."

I turned over to see who was calling my name.

"Cody�.Do you think you could eat something?"

I shook my head weakly no.

"Would you like to drink some water or maybe orange juice?"

I shook my head yes slowly.

Sherry placed a straw in the orange juice and brought the glass down 
for me to sip.

"Tommy stopped by after lunch to see how you were doing Cody."

"Where's he now?" I asked Sherry softly.

"He had to leave to go to Y.M.C.A.. His class was tonight."

"What time is it?"

"Nine P.M. You slept all day.

I looked towards the window and saw it was dark outside.

"Will you try to eat something?"

I sat up slowly in bed and saw Sherry had some chicken soup on the 
table in front of me. She dipped the spoon into it and brought it to my 
mouth. As I swallowed the soup my throat was hurting. Sherry noticed 
the expression on my face.

"I'll get you some medicine for your throat in a few minutes Cody, but 
right now lets get some more soup into you"

I continued eating the soup Sherry was feeding me until it was about 
half gone.

"Would you like some more juice?"

I shook my head slowly no.

Sherry placed the spoon in the bowl then moved the bed-table off to the 
side.

"Cody, I need to check to see if you need to be changed."

I sat up slowly as Sherry pulled my zipper down to my ankle. She helped 
me pull my arms out of the sleeves and pulled the sleeper down my back 
and under my rear to my ankles. Sherry reached down and felt the front 
and crotch of my diaper.

"You're a little wet Cody, so we'd better get you changed for the 
night."

I looked down at my diaper, and through the plastic pants I could see 
about a fist size wet spot on the front of my diaper. Sherry reached 
over to the items that were on my nightstand by the bed and took a 
towel off and slipped it under my rear. She pulled my plastic pant down 
to my ankles and then unfastened my diaper and pulled it out from under 
me. She picked up a washcloth and washed my front, crotch and rear as I 
lay there. I was having a hard time keeping my eyes opened as Sherry 
worked on me. In cottage-A, we'd all be sound asleep right now, and I 
guess that's why I was having a hard time staying awake now. Sherry put 
the washcloth back on the table and then took two cloth diapers off the 
nightstand.

She opened up the first diaper and spread it on the bed down near my 
feet. She unfolded the other diaper and placed them in the middle of 
the diaper, then tri-folded the diapers.

"I need you to lift you rear for me, Cody."

I managed to lift my rear off the bed as she slipped the diaper under 
it. She managed to fastened the diaper together with the safety pins., 
then she pulled my plastic pants up over my diaper as I lifted my rear 
for a second.

"Let's get your sleeper back on you guy."

My rear went up for hopefully the last time as she pulled the sleeper 
up from the rear. She helped me slip my arms back into the sleeves and 
then pulled the zipper back up to my neck and fastened the tab closed 
over it.

"Cody, I have some aspirin for you,"

I opened my mouth and she put it in and then she gave me a drink of 
water.

"I need to take your temp. again, then you can go back to sleep."

I turned my head as she placed the probe in my ear.

"Humm, One hundred three. Your temperature has gone up a little. If 
your temperature gets much higher Cody, we might have to take you to 
the hospital."

Hospital I thought. I never wanted to go to the hospital again for the 
rest of my life!

I had been in and out of hospitals since I was three years old. I 
turned over on my stomach and went back to sleep thinking about what 
Sherry had just said.

I heard the bell ringing off in the distance. I opened my eyes and as I 
lay there I could see it was still dark outside. It wasn't the dinner 
bell I heard, it must be the wake up bell or maybe the breakfast bell. 
I lay there for about five minutes before deciding to push the button 
on the side of my bed for Sherry. My mouth was dry and I was thirsty. 
The hallway lights came on and I could hear Sherry walking towards my 
room. The lights in the room went on and blinded me for a moment until 
my eyes adjusted to the light.

"How do you feel Cody?" Sherry asked as she walked around my bed 
towards my head.

"Can I have some water?"

"Sure sweetie"

Sherry picked up my glass and put the straw in my mouth. I started 
sucking on the straw and nearly emptied the glass of water.

"You were thirsty, weren't you?"

I nodded my head slowly yes. My throat was still sore from the coughing 
I had done all night long.

Sherry poured more water into my glass from the pitcher on my 
nightstand and then pulled out a small packet from her smock.

"You need to take this medication Cody, it will help you feel better."

I opened my mouth and she put the pill in my mouth and gave me another 
sip of water to wash it down.

"Sherry?' I said softly

"Yes?"

"Do you like Tommy?" I asked her.

She hesitated before answering "Yes"

"Are� you an Tommy going to get, married?"

She started to blush a little.

"Why do you ask?"

"If Tommy didn't marry you, I would"

I saw the smile on her face widen and saw the twinkle in her eyes.

"You just rest Cody."

I started to reach for the remote control to the television that was on 
the nightstand and Sherry picked it up and placed it in my hand. She 
ran her fingers thru my hair for a moment while she looked into my 
eyes.

"I'll see if I can get something good for you to eat for breakfast." 
she said then she headed for the door.

I was not as tired as I had been, and now I WANTED to watch T.V.. Mark 
Allen still did not have cable yet, but if I knew Tommy, we would have 
cable before next summer. I channel surfed up and down and all I could 
find on was news, religion, an opera on one P.B.S. channel, and 
'BARNEY" on the other P.B.S. channel. I watched Barney as he taught the 
kids about Good Sportsmanship. It was GOOD to loose gracefully and not 
pout, Barney was pointing out to the little kids As I watched Barney 
the breakfast bell rang. Must be six-twenty-five I thought, time for 
everyone to head to the dinning hall. A few minutes later, Sherry stuck 
her head in the room and said, " I'm going to eat now, be back in a 
little while with your breakfast Cody�.and YOU stay in bed!"

I said, "Yes" as she left.

The Magic School Bus came on next and I enjoyed watching this program. 
This time Ms. Frizzle shrunk the class down to the size of a bugs. It 
was interesting, listening about all the things that bugs do. About 
halfway thru, I heard the front door of the infirmary open and then 
slowly close. As Sherry entered my room, I saw the tray in her hands 
and now I was hungry. She placed the tray down on the rolling bed table 
and said: I'll be back in a minute with your juice Cody, as soon as I 
take my jacket off and wash up."

As soon as she left the room, I peeked under the towel that covered the 
tray. When I saw the large bowel there, I knew I was not having bacon 
and eggs for breakfast. I was hoping it was cold cereal like Foot Loops 
or Apple Jacks, but when I caught the scent, I knew it was cream of 
wheat. I didn't like cream of wheat, but, I was hungry. Sherry came in 
about two minutes later with a glass of orange juice for me.

"I have a surprise for you Cody"

Sherry put the orange juice down on the table then pulled out some 
sugar packets and a small container of cinnamon from her smock.

Sherry took the towel off the tray, put it on my chest and tucked it 
into my blanket sleeper around my neck. She sprinkled the sugar and 
cinnamon on top of the cream of wheat, stirred it a little with the 
spoon and took out a spoonful, then placed it in my mouth. I swallowed 
the first mouthful. As Sherry was getting the second spoonful ready, I 
tucked my arms under the sheet and blankets to keep them warm. About 
ten minutes later I told Sherry I was getting full. When I looked in 
the bowl, it was nearly empty. Sherry held the orange juice and I took 
the straw in my mouth and almost finished drinking all of it. Sherry 
put the orange juice glass back on the table, took the towel out from 
under my chin and gently wipe the food that didn't hit the target, off 
my face. As Sherry pulled the table away from my bed, I knew what was 
next on the list.

"Time to get you changed, Cody."

'BINGO' I thought.

Same way as before I thought:

* Pull tab at neck.
* Pull zipper down to ankle.
* Sit Cody up.
* Pull blanket sleeper down back under rear end-to ankles.
* Place changing pad under Cody.
* Pull plastic pant from waist down legs to ankles.
* Unfasten left diaper pin.
* Place diaper pin in safe place.
* Unfasten right diaper pin.
* Place diaper pin in safe place.
* Take diaper out from under Cody.
* Place in diaper pail.
* Gently wash Cody, front, rear.
* Towel dry Cody, front, rear.
* Place first diaper flat.
* Tri fold diaper together.
* Place in center first diaper.
* Slide diaper under Cody.
* Put baby powder on hand, Spread powder on rear.
* Put baby power on hand.
* Spread powder on front.
* Pull front diaper up between legs.
* Fasten right front, rear, together using same diaper pin previously 
put in safe place.
* Fasten left front, rear, together using same diaper pin previously 
put in safe place.
* Pull plastic pant up legs over diapers (CHECK AND MAKE SURE THE CLOTH 
DIAPER IS NICE AND NEATLY TUCKED INSIDE OF THE PLASTIC PANTS AROUND 
WAIST AND LEGS AS THIS WILL HELP PREVENT LEAKS) Pull blanket sleeper up 
from ankles, under rear and continue up Cody's back.
* Place right arm in sleeve.
* Place left arm in sleeve.
* Pull zipper up from ankle to heck (Make sure Cody breathing after 
this step!!!!) Snap tab closed over zipper.

CONGRATULATIONS! You have just successfully changed Cody's diaper.

It was almost eight A.M. by the time I was changed. Sherry had wrapped 
my wet diaper in a plastic bag and put it on the bed-table with my 
breakfast tray. She gathered up the extra diapers and put them back on 
the shelf in my night stand with the baby powder. I was dry again, and 
that made me fell a lot better. Sherry took my temp again and it was 
one-hundred-two.

"Get better soon Cody" Sherry said, then she pushed the bed-table out 
of the room and down the hall.

I tried to watch T.V. but I couldn't decide what channel I wanted. I 
wanted to sleep, but that was hard. My muscles still ached and my 
throat was sore. I kept tossing and turning until I found the right 
position and finally went back to sleep.

"Cody����Cody���"

"Time to wake up sweetie"

I opened my eyes slowly. The sun was shinning into the room. Sherry was 
standing over me with a smile on

"How you doing sweetie?"

"Okay" I said still half a sleep.

"Thought you would like something to eat"

"No" I said.

"How about something for your sore throat?"

I moistened my lips with my tongue "Yes"

Sherry took the cap off the bottle and poured the green liquid into a 
small cup.

"Cody��.Cody�.."

"I need you to stay awake for me�just for a minute"

"I need to take a throat culture Cody, open your mouth."

I opened my mouth and Sherry placed a cotton swab in my mouth and 
brushed against the back of my throat.

Sherry took the swab out of my mouth before I sneezed.

"Sorry about that, sweetie"

I watched as she placed the swab in a long clear glass vial. She pulled 
the cotton swab out from another vial.

"Just one more Cody�. Then I'll give you something for your throat"

I opened my mouth again and after she brushed the back of my throat I 
sneezed twice.

"Here you are Cody�..this will help your cough and sore throat"

I took the small cup from her and drank the liquid inside. She saw me 
scrunch up my face.

"What?�..don't you like licorice'

I scrunched my face again.

Cody�I need to feel your neck for a minute"

I relaxed as she felt my neck down to my shoulder.

"Okay Cody�. I need to take your temp again,�then I'll let you go back 
to sleep"

I turned my head and she put the probe in. I waited to hear that 
familiar beep that told me she was done.

"Still a-hundred-two"��.Cody�..Tommy will on duty in a few hours�..you 
can sleep now babe."

I turned my head to the right and went back to sleep.

'Hey guy, Just because your sick doesn't mean you get out of suffering 
like the rest of us."

"Tommy?"

"Yeah guy"

I turned my head and looked to make sure it was Tommy.

"Hi, Tommy!" I said with all the strength I had.

"Sherry said you've been a really sick little pup."

"Yeah"

"How about some food poisoning?"

"I'm not hungry" I answered.

"C'mon guy, just a little bit?"

"What is it?"

"Your favorite�.soup!"

I turned onto my back and slowly sat up.

"Got any beer and pretzels with that?" I asked joking.

"You know you're too young for pretzels, and I'm fresh outa beer"

"DARN"

"Think you could eat a little soup�.for me?"

"Yeah�I'll try"

"What time is it?"

"Bout nine" Tommy answered.

I looked at the window to make sure Tommy wasn't pulling my leg. It was 
dark outside, and I guess the guys playing on the jungle gym outside my 
window that afternoon didn't wake me up like usual with their yelling 
and screaming.

"Tommy?"

"What guy?"

"When am I gonna get better?'

"Soon�.I missed you Sunday when you didn't show up at my room after 
church"

"Sorry"

"I found out later you were over here making passes at Sherry!"

I could feel myself blushing now like Sherry did yesterday.

"She tell you?"

"Yeah�.an I'm gonna give you a run for your money Cody"

Tommy put a spoonful of soup in my mouth before I could say anything.

"Guess she's got a crush on you too Cody." Tommy finished saying.

I knew I had a red face by now.

"Few more spoonfuls and you'll be done guy"

I sat there while Tommy finished feeding the soup to me.

"Hey,�some kid came by the administration building this afternoon 
looking for ya. Said his name was �Chuck?�.Chimp? Chewy?�.or something 
like that."

"You mean Chip?"

"Yeah�.. guess that was his name"

"What did he want?"

"Was wondering why you skipped class today. Told him you and Sherry 
went and eloped, and you're on your honeymoon."

I laughed a little before I felt my sore throat hurt.

"Cody�time to get you changed, for the night"

I didn't mind Tommy changing my diapers, he'd changed them so many time 
before that I had gotten used to him doing it. Tommy pulled the bed-
table away from my bed and reached down under my nightstand, took out 
the diapers and baby powder.

"Tommy?'

"Yea?"

"Think I'll ever be able to..to control myself?"

"Maybe some day."

"Now quite disturbing me Cody, I was supposed to be do something else 
Humm, can't remember what it was"

I looked at Tommy and saw that fake confused look on his face, as he 
stood there thinking.

"Tommy?�.you're supposed to change me."

"Huh�. Change you into what?"

I laughed lightly remembering my sore throat.

I was feeling a lot better now with Tommy around.

Tommy reached over and pulled my sheet and blanket down just as I 
remembered that I was still wearing a blanket sleeper. I saw the 
surprised expression on him, but just for a second as he continued 
getting me ready to be changed. I didn't say anything at first about 
the sleeper I was wearing, but then I had to say something.

"Bet I look stupid wearing a blanket sleeper like a little kid?"

"Stupid? Stupid? You look nice and warm to me, Cody."

Tommy had said the right thing at the right time and in the right place 
to me. I just lay there, relaxed and let Tommy do his thing.

Tommy had my diaper changed in nothing flat. I think he knew I was 
tired and wanted to go back to sleep.

As Tommy was putting the things back into the night stand, he asked me: 
"How bout a bath tomorrow guy?�.If you feel up to it"

"Yes" I answered.

"Go to sleep, kid." Tommy said, then turned off the light and left my 
room.

I woke up that Wednesday morning to the sound of a boy coughing in the 
hallway. I could hear Tommy in the front office informing the boy that 
he was going to be staying at the infirmary for a few days until he was 
better. As the coughing grew louder, I waited for Tommy and the boy to 
enter my room.

I didn't want someone else in here with me, especially when Tommy was 
changing my diaper. I knew we end up fighting over the T.V. and what we 
were going to watch.

I watched the hall thru my opened door as Tommy and the boy passed by 
as they continued to walk down the hall to the second room. Tommy was 
telling him to strip down to his boxers and he'd be right back with 
some pajamas for the boy to wear while he was here. As Tommy walked 
back towards the office, he stopped at my room.

"Hey�..breakfast is ready Cody�Hungry?"

I told him "Yes"

Tommy headed off to towards the office and as I listen, I heard him 
pick up his keys and open the closet door next to the office. As I 
listen to the closet door close behind him I was wondering why Tommy 
put the boy in the second room and not my room. Tommy opened the closet 
door and I listened as he walked back towards the second room whistling 
as he carried a set of white pajamas past my door. When Tommy got to 
the second room, I heard him telling the boy in the other room what he 
was supposed to be doing while he was in the infirmary. I turned my 
head and looked out the window in my room. I was trying to figure out 
about what time it was by how light it was outside, I was guessing it 
was about eight A.M. or there about. I was thinking that maybe some 
clouds may be throwing my estimates off by maybe an hour at the most.

"Want your stomach pumped before, or after breakfast Cody?"

I turned and there was Tommy, in the doorway, with the breakfast tray 
held up high on the palm of his right hand, and a towel draped neatly 
over his left arm like he was a waiter in a restaurant.

"Remember Cody, We have a bath engagement after breakfast."

"I know" I said.

"Tommy?"

"Yes"

"Do you think I can use the pot before I take a bath?"

"Cody!, Don't use the word 'pot' around here! I don't want them to find 
my stash." Tommy said joking as he put my breakfast tray down on my 
bed-table.

"Sure you can Cody, now what would you like for breakfast?"

"FOOD" I replied.

"I think we got just what you ordered."

Tommy took the towel off the top of the tray and I saw the two 
individual servings of syrup at the side of the covered plate. I knew 
it was either pancakes, waffles, or French toast. Tommy took the large 
cover off the plate and there were three waffles stacked on top of one 
another, hash brown potatoes, and three strips of bacon. I was HUNGRY 
now! I poured the syrup on the waffles then Tommy cut them up into 
smaller pieces I could handle. I grabbed the fork and speared my first 
piece of solid food I'd had in three days. As I was about to stuff it 
in my mouth, Tommy took the towel and tucked it in around my neck of my 
blanket sleeper. Tommy sat there on the side of my bed for a few 
minutes watching me eat.

"Cody?"

"What?" I said with a mouth full of food.

"Do you know a doctor Osaka?"

I stopped eating as I answered Tommy's question: "Yeah, he's the doctor 
that has been taking care of my right arm since I was put in my last 
foster home. Why?"

"You have an appointment to see him on Friday November ninth at three-
thirty P.M."

"What for?"

"He wants to reevaluate your right arm."

I didn't ask Tommy any more questions.

I had gotten used to going to see the doctors a long time ago. They 
always wanted to see how my bladder was, or wanted to know if I had any 
pains in my lower back or how high I could raise my right arm, of if I 
could feel this, as they lightly stuck a pin in different places on my 
right arm. The last doctor I saw was Dr. Miller. He was the doctor I 
had seen after the truck accident, almost three years ago, and I'd seen 
him many times since.

"Looks like your ready for a bath Cody"

I finished chewing the last mouthful of food and swallowed it before 
answering "Okay"

Tommy took the towel out from under my chin and wiped the syrup I knew 
was on my face.

Tommy pulled my sheet and blanket down off me then slipped his right 
arm under my legs and slipped his left arm under my right arm pit 
behind my back, picked me off the bed and carried me to the bathroom. 
He put my feet down on the floor and steadied me for a moment until I 
got used to standing again for the first time in three days. He 
unsnapped the tab at my neck and then pulled the zipper down from my 
neck to my left ankle. He slid the blanket sleeper off my shoulders 
down my back down to my ankles. I held onto Tommy's shoulder with my 
left arm for balance as I stepped out of the sleeper. Tommy reached 
over to my plastic pants, spread them and pulled them down off my 
diaper to my ankles and I stepped out of them.

"Same pants you came in here with Sunday morning Cody?"

I said "Yes" knowing Tommy was talking about the plastic pants he'd 
just taken off of me.

"We're going to have to change these every day from now on so you don't 
get D.R. (diaper rash) again."

Tommy unfastened the safety pin on my left side and slid the wet diaper 
down my right leg to the floor and I stepped out of it.

"Need to use the pot now?"

"Yeah" I said as I went over and sat down on the toilet.

Tommy reached over and turned on the faucets to the tub and adjusted 
the temperature of the water. then closed the drain.

Cody, when there is enough water in the tub, turn it off."

I said "Okay" from the toilet.

Tommy gathered my clothes off the floor and as he was leaving said: 
"Need to strip your bed and put some clean sheets on Cody. Also need to 
get some more supplies for you too. You sit and relax in the tub for 
about ten minutes and I'll be back."

"Okay" I said.

When I was finished on the toilet, I flushed it.

I went over to the tub and tested the water temp with my finger, and if 
it felt that good on my finger it was going to feel great when I got 
in. I stepped into the water with caution and sat down slowly. It felt 
so good to be in a warm bath. I lay back until the water came up to my 
neck and I relaxed. I turned the faucets off and laid back and I was 
felling good. My muscles didn't hurt as much, my stomach was full and I 
was some what clean, and warm.

I could hear Tommy making my bed as I sat in the tub enjoying change of 
pace from the last three days of confinement in my bed.

"Ready for a good scrubbing kid?" Tommy asked as he entered the 
bathroom.

"Feels so good to be outta bed" I responded as I sat up in the tub.

I saw the washcloth and bar of soap in Tommy's hands an knew he was 
ready for action. Tommy dropped a towel down to the floor and knelt on 
it. He dipped the cloth and bar of soap into the water then lathered 
the washcloth up.

"Not gonna wash your hair Cody, don't want a wet head in the bed.'

Tommy lifted my right arm up and started scrubbing it. If it had been 
anyone else but Tommy, they would have never gotten away with it. I 
never let ANYONE touch my right arm unless I had to, like the doctors. 
It might not work to well, but it was still a part of me.

Tommy finished scrubbing it and started on my back. Being thirteen 
years old and being given a bath by an adult would have embarrassed 
most other guys, but I had gotten used to it. In the hospital, before 
and after surgery I'd received my share of sponge baths, mostly by 
female nurses and sometimes interns.

'Tommy?"

"Yes Cody"

"Do you think I can go back to school on Friday?"

"We'll have to see. Your temp has to be normal twenty-four hours before 
I can release you from the infirmary. Your still running a hundred-two, 
so I wouldn't plan on Friday�maybe by Monday�we'll see.

Tommy had finished scrubbing my neck and stomach when I looked at him. 
He had that serious look on his face, that I only had seen a few times.

"Okay guy, stand up for me now.'

I gathered my feet under me and rose up out of the water, bracing 
myself on Tommy's shoulder. As I stood there, Tommy washed my left arm 
and finished washing my front down my legs to the level of the water.

"Turn"

I did as Tommy told me holding onto the small towel rack mounted on the 
wall over the tub. Tommy washed the rest of my back and rear as I stood 
there.

"I'm going to use the shower head to rinse you off Cody, and I don't 
want you to get your head wet."

Tommy reached down and flipped the drain open again, then turned on the 
faucets adjusting the water temp. He pushed the button in and the water 
started coming out of the shower head two feet above my head on the 
wall. The water hit me below my neck and it felt good.

"Turn."

I did as I was told until I made a full circle. I turned back and faced 
Tommy as he turned the water off.

"Kay guy, lets get you dried off and back in a warm bed before you 
catch a cold."

I smiled when Tommy made that crack.

I reached up and held onto the bathtub curtain as Tommy turned the 
water off. Tommy got up off his knees, took the large towel of the 
towel bar and then started drying me off from my neck down.

"Tommy?"

"What kid?"

"What are those bumps down there around my penis?"

"That's were your going to be getting hair soon."

"Why?"

"As you get older, your body starts to change. It's called puberty. 
It's the change all boys go through when your not quite a little boy 
anymore and not a man yet, now step out of the tub so I can dry those 
feet off.

Tommy finished drying me off and then I walked back into my room and 
climbed back into bed. I pulled the covers up over myself to my neck to 
get warm as I was now shivering.

Tommy wiped the water up off the floor before he turned the light off 
in the bathroom.

As Tommy came back into the room, he asked me : "Cody, on the pot, drop 
a little or a lot?"

"Little" I said.

"Hard or liquid"

"Hard"

"Sounds like your getting better, I'll be right back to get you 
dressed"

I lay there shivering under the covers hoping Tommy wasn't going to be 
too long.

After a few minutes Tommy returned with his arms loaded with cloth 
diapers and a plastic pant.

"Let's get you dressed so I don't hafta make your bed again!"

When it came to making a bed, Tommy hated it. His idea of a 'made bed' 
was a sheet on the bottom, blanket on top, and him in the middle. That 
was a made bed to Tommy. Why make your bed when all you were going to 
do was unmake it when you got back into it that night, besides, the 
only one who ever saw it was John who occupied the same room.

In cottage-A, Karen had you make your bed every morning before you 
lined up for breakfast. No made bed, no breakfast until.

"We need to wait until Carl is finished making his bed before we can go 
to breakfast boys" our house mom would say, then the aww.. that came 
from all of us as Carl went back to his room and made his bed. But 
Karen was sympatric on a lot of occasions, as she would straighten up 
the bed a little for some of us while we were waiting in line for 
breakfast. Being young, or stupid, I guess we just never noticed it.

When Tommy had to make a bed for someone else, it was always perfect. 
The top sheet was tucked under the mattress nice and snug, and the 
blanket or quilt on top was always straight with the edge of the 
mattress. He made a bed like he was expecting the Queen of England to 
be stopping by for the night. Give Tommy a sheet, blanket, and pillow 
and Tommy was asleep in no time.

I watched as Tommy spread the first diaper out flat on the blanket over 
my feet. He took the second and a third diaper, tri-folded them 
together and placed them in the center of the first diaper, then he 
folded up the sides of the first diaper over the second and third 
diaper. Tommy knew I liked it this way. Tommy folded the whole thing in 
half and I knew it was now my turn to participate. I pulled my legs out 
from under my covers and held my rear up as Tommy slipped the diaper 
under me and unfolded it and as I let my rear down. He pulled it up 
snug between my legs and spread the sides out on top of my stomach. 
Front and rear together, one safety pin, Done. Next front and rear 
together, pull snug, next safety pin, Done.

Tommy picked up the light blue plastic pants and as I held my feet up 
slipped them on over my feet, up my legs and I bounced my rear up, he 
pulled the pants over my diaper before my rear came back down to rest 
on the bed.

Tommy reached down behind the dozen stacked diapers at the foot of my 
bed an said, "I wished you guys in cottage-A would grow up!"

I knew by the expression on his face he was baiting me, but I had to 
say it "Why?"

"So I'd have some pajamas over here that fit you guys!"

Tommy pulled some ski pajamas out from behind the diapers.

They were the same pajamas that Sherry had showed to me the Sunday 
morning I was admitted to the infirmary. They were white with blue 
cuffs and had cowboys and horses all over them.

"Lets get these on you so I can get you out of my hair Cody."

I knew Tommy wasn't serious, if Tommy didn't have his classes at school 
or some other paperwork he had to do, he'd be right beside me giggling 
and laughing while we watched cartoons on T.V.

Tommy started putting the pajama bottoms over my feet as I raised them 
then up my legs. I put my feet down and raised my rear and he pulled 
the pajamas over my diapers.

"Okay kid, sit up."

I did as I was told and Tommy helped me get my right arm in the sleeve 
then I finished up with my left arm then head.

"Tommy?" I said as I lay back on my pillow

"What guy?"

"Who's the boy in the next room?"

"Ryan�..he's from cottage-B"

"What's he in for?"

"I think the same as you"

"Why didn't you put him in my room?"

"I thought you would like to have some privacy Cody"

I knew what Tommy meant.

"Cody, remember talking about doctor Osaka"

"Yeah"

"Well, I had a long talk with him yesterday on the phone, and, he 
wanted to know how you were doing."

"What did you tell him?"

"Well, I told him that you were fine. Cody,..Doctor Osaka wanted to 
know if you still had the brace he had had made for your right arm and 
hand?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Where is it now?"

"On the top shelf in my closet in my room. Why?"

"Doctor Osaka�would like you to start wearing it again."

"NO!� He'd said I don't need to wear it anymore!"

"Well�.Cody�.He said he wants you to start wearing it again,�.all the 
time your awake."

"NO! I'm not gonna wear that DAMN BRACE !" I said at almost the top of 
my voice.

I stared straight at Tommy's eyes, but he wasn't looking into mine, he 
was looking down at my right arm. Tommy slowly sat down on the edge of 
the bed and slipped his big right hand under the palm of my right hand 
and slowly rubbed the back of my hand with his thumb. I could not feel 
it, but I watched.

"TOMMY�.I don't �..I�I�don't want to wear it!"

I pulled my right hand from Tommy's and I turned on my side away from 
him with tears streaming down my face. I lay there crying and thinking 
how Osaka had lied to me! I hated that damn brace! I hated Osaka! Now I 
hated Tommy for telling that I had to wear that damn arm brace again! I 
hated everything!

Tommy was running his fingers slowly thru my hair. "I'll be back to see 
you in awhile, guy" he said.

As I lay there crying, I thought to myself: The teasing. The names they 
called me. The guys that picked on me all the time! Because of wearing 
that stupid dumb fucking brace. No one at Mark Allen knew about it, and 
sure as hell, no one at Baldwin Elementary was ever going to see it on 
me. No way! I'd rather die!

It didn't hurt me that much when they called me shortie, or runt 
because I'm really small for my age, that did not hurt half as much as 
when they called me cripple. I hated that name! I hated that stupid 
word. They would chase me around the playground yelling cripple at me, 
and wouldn't leave me alone! I wished that glass had cut my damned arm 
off instead then I wouldn't have that useless thing hanging from my 
shoulder!

I buried my face in the pillow as I cried even harder now, remembering 
how the last few years had been.

"Cody������.���.You awake yet?"

I stirred a little.

"Care to talk?"

I didn't move or say anything.

"You've been asleep for awhile."

I looked at the window and the sun was starting to go down.

"Been asleep almost eight hours." Tommy said as he walked softly into 
the room and sat on the side of my bed.

"Talked to Sharron while you were asleep Cody."

Sharron was the social worker at Mark Allen for the boys in cottage-A 
and B. She knew everything about the guys in my cottage. She knew what 
they liked, disliked, hobbies, the sports they liked, the subjects they 
were good in at school, and the subjects they were not so good in. Ask 
Sharon a question about any guy in our cottage, she would have an 
answer for you in a second. I met her the first day at Mark Allen boys 
home, and when I called her Miss. Collins, she said "No Cody, just call 
me Sharron, please." I liked her at that moment.

"She filled me in about the arm brace Cody." Tommy said.

"I�"

"Want to talk now?"

I turned on my back and stared at Tommy's knee. I couldn't look him in 
the eye.

"I..I don't want to wear it�.I can't." I said as the tears filled my 
eyes again.

Tommy started lightly rubbing my right leg with his hand back and forth 
softly

"Sharon told me all about Oak Grove children's home and Emerson 
school."

I glanced at his eyes and I knew Sharon had told him about all the 
teasing that went on at Oak Grove.

"Hungry yet?"

I barely shook my head no.

"Well I'll be leaving soon for dinner,�.so if you need anything, just 
push the button�.Okay?"

I half nodded once.

Tommy got up off the bed and walked slowly out the door.

I knew that by not talking to Tommy, I was hurting him, but he had hurt 
me so bad that morning, wanting me to wear THAT brace. I turned back 
looking towards the window. I watched as the shadows started reaching 
up the outside walls of the cottage I was supposed to be in. I listened 
as two boys were arguing over a toy truck in the sand box.

I found it first, I heard one boy say. No you didn't the other said. I 
heard Karen come out a few minutes later telling the boys to go in and 
get washed up for dinner. If Karen was on time calling the boys in, it 
should be four-fifty-five P.M. I continued watching the shadows on the 
wall until I went to sleep.

Cody���..Need you to wake up and take some medicine."

I opened my eyes and adjusted them to the lights in the room. Tommy was 
standing in front of me.

"Need you to turn over and sit up." Tommy said to me in a soft voice.

I turned and sat up as Tommy handed me the little cup of liquid. I 
opened my mouth and poured the medicine in. It had a different taste 
this time. It was cherry flavored this time. I placed the cup down on 
the bed-table as Tommy said: "How bout some orange juice? You haven't 
had anything all day." I took the glass from Tommy's hand and sucked on 
the straw until the juice was almost gone. Tommy took the glass from me 
and placed it on the bed-table.

"Cody, I need to change you, then take your temp and then I'll let you 
sleep"

I turned my head as Tommy inserted the temp probe into my ear. After 
the beep, Tommy removed the probe and read the display: "One-hundred 
one-point-five, Temps coming down Cody!"

I just lay there.

"Now, Let's get those Fruit of the Looms off ya and some dry ones on.

Tommy pulled the blanket and sheet down until I was exposed to the 
night air of the room. Tommy then proceeded to change my diaper as I 
lay there. I don't think I had said more then three words to him since 
that morning. I was starting to feel remorse for the way I was treating 
Tommy now. It wasn't his fault that Osaka had changed his mind. I knew 
that when I didn't talk to Tommy, that I was really hurting him.

As Tommy pulled my pajamas back up over my diaper he said: "Well, 
that's a job I won't have to do for the next twenty years I hope. Hey 
kid, mind holding it that long?"

A small smile came to my face: "Can you guarantee me that you'll change 
me then. My Fruit of the looms may be full by then."

I looked up at Tommy's face and saw the small smile.

"Hungry kid?"

"No"

"Need anything, you know where the button is."

"Tommy?"

"What kid?"

"I haven't heard that kid uh�..Ryan coughing"

"Took him to the hospital before lunch this morning."

"Why?"

"His temperature was one-hundred-four. Didn't want to take any 
chances."

"You get a good night's sleep guy" Tommy said as he covered me back up.

Tommy gathered up my wet diapers and headed out of the room. As he was 
about to turn off the light I said "Tommy?"

"Yes"

"Good night"

"Good night kid"

I saw Tommy's eyes were glistening as he turned the light off.

I was now sorry that I treated Tommy the way I did that day. He was the 
only one I really could talk to, and he would listen to every word. 
Never made fun of anything I said or any questions I had asked. Never 
made me feel bad when he changed my diapers. Diapers to Tommy were 
called Briefs, Fruit of the Looms, Super absorption under things,. He 
never called them diapers, at least not in front of me. I looked up at 
the tiled ceiling. How many holes were in each of those tiles? Wonder 
if anyone ever counted them.

"Hey Cody, care for any slop this morning?"

I turned over and Tommy was standing in the doorway waiting, I guess 
for my eyes to tell him it was all right to come in.

"This stuff guaranteed to give you indigestion." Tommy said as he 
walked to my bed an placed the tray down on my bed-table. I looked down 
at the towel covered tray, like I'd done for the last few mornings, 
hoping that there was something good to eat underneath. Tommy reached 
down and took a corner of the towel in each of his hands and as he 
pulled the towel off the tray in one quick pull said "TA-DAAAA

I looked at the tray and saw the empty bowl in the middle of the tray, 
and on each side of the bowl was a box of individual servings of 
cereal. Fruit Loops on the right, and Apple Jacks on the left.

"Thought you could use some good food inside you" Tommy added.

Two boxes of cereal, at one sitting. I was in seventh heaven. Roy never 
let anyone get TWO boxes of cereal at one time. You took ONE box, ate 
it, and if you wanted more, you went back to the line and got ONE more 
box.

"Guess what Cody?"

I looked up from the tray at Tommy as he said: "TA-DAAAA"

Tommy pulled his hands from behind his back, and in each hand was 
another box of cereal. FRUIT LOOPS in one hand, and APPLE JACKS in the 
other!

"How did you do it Tommy?"

Tommy winked at me, "Got my ways"

Tommy placed the two new boxes of cereal down on my tray and said :"Be 
back in a sec. with some milk"

As Tommy left the room I reached down to the little box of Fruit Loops 
on the tray and started splitting the perforations down the middle of 
the box with my left thumb. I tore the box open wider and poured the 
contents in the bowl. Tommy came back into the room holding a half 
filled plastic container of milk. He was studying the milk in the 
container, "Don't know if this milks good or bad. Been in the fridge 
since I stated working here about a year ago. Well you let me know if 
its good or not, will you Cody?" Tommy pretended like he was going to 
pour the milk on my cereal when I said "Wait. Smell the milk and see if 
its sour" I told Tommy. Tommy smelled the milk and said "Smells good to 
me" then continued saying " OOP's, dropped a bugger in the milk. Oh 
well."

I started laughing as Tommy poured the milk on my cereal. That was the 
first time I had Fruit Loops for breakfast in a long time, or at least 
since I went to Chip's house last Saturday morning.

"Tommy?"

"What kid?"

"I'm sorry bout yesterday"

"I know"

"Sorry about using that word yesterday too."

I know you are, Cody"

Tommy left my room whistling.

I started in on the Fruit Loops and in no time they were gone. Now the 
APPLE JACKS! As I poured the milk on them I watched as they bobbed up 
and down in the milk. Soon my taste buds were happy and I was staring 
at an empty bowl again. Now which one? I did the einny meany mini moe 
for my next selection and soon I was shoveling the Fruit Loops into my 
mouth and they were taking up space in my stomach. Think I'll save the 
Apple Jacks for later. Make a good snack between lunch and dinner I 
thought.

Must be after nine A.M. , mostly game shows on T.V. now, I thought. I 
was pushing the bed-table away from me when I heard the phone in the 
office ring. Funny, I'd been in here about five days now and that was 
the first time I noticed the phone ringing. As I laid back against the 
propped up pillows, I noticed my rear was warmer then usual. I turned 
to my side slightly and slipped my hand under my pajamas in the rear 
and felt my diaper thru the plastic pants and the diaper was soaked. As 
I turned back up, "Did I poop in my diaper and didn't realize it. I 
knew what it felt like to poop. Maybe I pooped last night when I was 
asleep and didn't notice it until now. My body was starting to shake 
now. Did I lose control over my bowls now? I was getting scared. I 
lifted the sheet and blanket up a little and sniffed the air 
underneath. No poop smell. I thought for a moment then I dropped the 
sheet and blanket back down on me and sunk back, deep into the pillows 
behind my back with relief. I slept on my back last night and the pee 
ran down my front to my rear when I wet myself through the night and 
morning. I didn't lose control over my bowls after all. I just slept 
wrong. I was almost in tears before I figured out what happened and 
how. I breathed a sigh of relief. I thought I was going to have to tell 
Tommy that I was pooping in my diapers now, like a little BABY! I was 
still shaking a little.

As I was calming down, I reached for the button to get Tommy. I was 
about to push it when I heard Tommy's whistling coming towards my room.

"Hey, Tommy" I almost yelled at him as he came into my room,

"What?"

"Got good news and bad news for ya."

Tommy acted surprised as he took a step backward.

"What's the good news kid?"

"My diaper is sopping wet!"

"And the bad news?"

"You gotta change it!"

"Well, I got more good news from the hospital a second ago, Ryan the 
kid that was in the next room?"

"Yeah"

"Nurse at the hospital said his temp is going down. the nurse said his 
temp hit one-o-six when he was admitted, and now its down to one-
hundred-three. Looks like he'll be back in a few days I hope."

"Now, what's this bout some damp briefs?"

"I said Wet briefs"

"Well, lets get those Wet briefs off you then."

Tommy pulled the sheet and blanket off me and proceeded to change me 
like usual always remembering to clean me front and rear even when I 
told him it was not necessary.

After he finished this time, he sat on the bed and I knew he wanted to 
talk. The subject was arm brace. Tommy asked me what the combination 
was for the combination lock on my closet in cottage-A. I knew he was 
going to go and get my old arm and hand brace. I knew and Tommy knew 
that he could get into my closet anytime he wanted to, with or without 
my permission because all the locks on all the closets of all the boys 
at Mark Allen could be opened anytime with a key Mr. Gee had in his 
office. Tommy wanted me to give him the numbers to the lock of my own 
free will, and when I told him, I saw the relief in his face. It was 
now Friday and I knew my life was going to be a lot different from now 
on here at Mark Allen Boy's Home.

Tommy went and got the brace from my closet that morning. When he got 
back to the office he placed it down on the desk and studied it. It has 
five little slings hanging down from a large metal tee bar that curves 
down the back to a half cast that sits on the top of my right arm 
between my elbow and wrist. Three Velcro straps wrap down under my arm 
to attach it securely to my arm. Each of the slings is brought down and 
slipped over each of my fingers like you would slip a ring on a finger. 
The rubber bands between the slings and tee bar provide tension on my 
fingers by pulling them up.

Tommy cleaned up the brace with Windex and replaced all five of the 
rubber bands with new ones.

Friday's lunch was reruns of Thursday's dinner, spaghetti, French 
bread, corn, and green beans. Tommy got me two pieces of chocolate cake 
as dessert. I was drinking a lot more fluids now, and when Tommy took 
my temp. after my diaper change, I was at one-hundred even.

I was laying on my back watching T.V. when Tommy came into my room. I 
looked straight ahead but in the corner of my eye I could see the arm 
and hand brace in Tommy's hands. I could feel the tears in my eyes 
building. I looked at Tommy as he walked towards my bed, holding the 
brace like it was an offering from him to me. Tommy's face was 
straight, and the pupils in his eyes were big and dark. Tommy stopped 
at the left side of my bed holding the brace. My eyes went to the brace 
he held. My left arm reached over and retrieved it from Tommy and I 
placed on top of my right arm. The three Velcro straps were wrapped 
under my arm and fastened tightly to the top of the brace., The sling 
for each finger was slipped under the tips of each of my fingers. It 
was now on my arm. I looked up at Tommy as I laid my right arm down on 
the blanket with my left hand. Tommy sat down beside and held me 
tightly as I cried.

Tommy laid me back against my pillows, and wiped the few tears left, 
from my eyes,

then Tommy lightly smiled. I closed my eyes and went to sleep.

"Wake up kid, I heard Tommy telling me.

I looked at the window and it was dark out side.

"Care for some dinner, Cody?"

I turned onto my back as I said "Yes, What is it?"

"Friday night surprise"

"What?"

"Friday night surprise. If you eat it for dinner on Friday, and you 
don't throw up on Saturday, SURPRISE"

I managed a little smile.

Your favorite Cody, greasy fried chicken, and I made sure Roy cooked it 
this time!"

I managed a bigger smile.

"You know, If you don't sit up and eat this chicken, Roys gonna want it 
back."

"What for?"

"Something about biological warfare, or something like that."

I couldn't help but laugh.

I picked up my fork and pushed the food around the plate before trying 
some of the chicken. It tasted better then it did last Saturday night

"You go ahead and eat Cody, and when you're done you just hit me."

I put the fork down on the plate fast and took my fist and punched 
Tommy lightly in the stomach.

"No Cody, I mean hit the button on the side of the bed for me."

"My mistake" I said to him.

Tommy walked out of the room holding his stomach like he'd just gone 
ten rounds with a pro fighter

I pushed the food around the plate again before I settled down and ate. 
When most of it was gone, then I laid back and looked at that THING on 
my right arm for awhile.

I pushed the button to let Tommy know I wanted him. A couple of minutes 
later, I heard Tommy walking back towards my room.

"Whatcha need?" Tommy said as he entered my room with the temp probe 
and the little cup I knew held my medicine.

"I'm done with dinner."

"Want to get the worst over with?"

"Yeah"

I turned my head and Tommy took my temp.

When I heard the beep, Tommy reach down and picked up my medicine and 
handed to me. I looked at it and it was the same red color as the last 
time. I knew it was cherry flavored. I poured it in my mouth quickly as 
I still hated taking medicine of any type.

"Ready" Tommy asked as he pushed the bed-table out of the way.

"Yeah"

Tommy pulled the sheet and blanket down like he'd done so many times 
before. Same thing as last time, I thought, take the diaper out, spread 
it, place two in the center��..

"Tommy?"

"Yeah?"

"You think I'll ever use my right hand?"

Tommy didn't answer, he just continued changing me.

"Tommy?"

"I hope so Cody"

Tommy was finishing pulling up my pajama pants when he said: "Time to 
take the brace off your arm for the night Cody.

Tommy reached over and lifted my arm and unfastened the straps, removed 
the brace and placed it on the nightstand."

"Dr. Osaka said you only wear this when you're awake Cody."

I already knew, but I didn't say anything.

Tommy was busy putting my things away and gathering up my wet diaper 
and dinner tray.

"Tommy? Do you think I can go to school on Monday?"

"Maybe Cody, if your temp is normal twenty-fours before. It's still 
one-hundred-one."

"Think I'll be better before Halloween?"

"I think so."

"I don't know what I should be for Halloween?"

I looked past Tommy towards the window. It was pitch black outside, but 
every now and then I could see a rain drop reflect the light from the 
security lights on top of my cottage.

"Tommy, Looks like its raining outside."

"Yeah, they said it might"

Tommy was heading towards the door, "See you in the morning kid" he 
said as he turned the light off.

I turned over on my stomach not taking my eyes off the falling rain 
outside of the window.

"Cody, time to wake up!"

I opened my eyes slowly.

"Need to take your temp before breakfast."

I remained laying on my stomach as Tommy put the probe in my left ear.

What time is it?"

"Almost breakfast"

I knew when he said that, that it was six-something in the morning.

"Why so early?"

"Sherry is coming in and work my day for me."

"Why?"

"Need to get some things done today."

"What?"

"Need to pick up the President at the airport and entertain him for a 
few hours today."

I knew Tommy was in a good mood and his joking was better then last 
night

"Dry?"

"Mostly" I told him.

"Sherry is going to be here after breakfast. By the way, got some socks 
for you to wear."

Tommy pushed my covers off of my legs a little, pulled my feet out from 
under the covers and put the socks on my feet.

"This will keep you a little warmer Cody, still raining outside a 
little."

"When will I see you?"

"I'll be bringing your slop back from the kitchen in a little while."

"Okay"

Tommy slipped my feet back under the covers and then pulled the covers 
on my chest up over my face, jokingly

"See you in a bit." Tommy said as he left.

I turned on the T.V. and channel surfed. News, news , commercials, 
news, aerobic exercise, commercials, black and white Lucy, commercials, 
Aw, just what I was looking for, Big Bird. I wonder how much meat you 
could get off him after you plucked his feathers off? Deep fried or 
oven baked?�.New York news, another commercial��.

I stopped surfing when I realized that Tommy had forgotten about my 
hand brace.

I looked at the night stand, there it was. I stared at it lying there 
for a few moments.

I glanced back at the T.V. My thumb was frozen off the remote. I wanted 
to channel surf more, but I just looked at the remote laying in my hand 
helplessly. My mind was on the brace. I let the remote slid out of my 
hand and reached over to the nightstand and took the brace off of it 
and placed it down beside my right arm. After a few moments, I reached 
over and picked IT up and placed it on my right arm. As I fastened the 
straps one at a time, I felt the tears building again. I slipped each 
finger into its own little sling one at a time. When all was done, I 
softly cried.

"Ready for some good food this morning Cody?"

"Huh?"

"Roy's out sick today, so he didn't make breakfast!"

I saw the brief surprise on Tommy's face as he saw the brace on my arm.

"Got another surprise for you kid."

"What?"

"Digging through the trash out back of the kitchen and found this."

Tommy tossed a book down on my chest and when I looked down it was a 
coloring book.

"Found these too!"

A new package of crayons were now resting on my chest.

"For me?"

"Yeah, thought you could use some exercise."

Doing anything other then watching T.V., sleeping, or staring off into 
space, was a hell of a lot better I thought! I looked back down at the 
coloring book and it was Shaggy and Scooby Doo on the front.

"Where did you really get them?"

"Drug store up the street was dumping them and thought you guys in 
cottage-A could use them."

Most of the things at Mark Allen for us boys to use or keep were 
donated by some groups or organizations. Stores would drop off 
overstock and take a tax deduction for the things.

"Well gotta hit the road guy, see you later!" Tommy said as he headed 
for the door.

"When?"

"Monday night, or sooner if your unlucky"

I said a soft 'Bye' as Tommy left.

I didn't want Tommy to leave me.

I looked at the coloring book still resting on my chest. I was going to 
have some fun today I thought.

Scooby was my favorite dog in the whole world. I often compared him and 
me together and realized that we were one and the same. Brave when we 
had to be, like when I got a shot in my rear at the hospital. Scared 
most of the time, like going to a new school on the first day or having 
to stand up in front of the class, but boy, we both could run like HELL 
when we had to!

I opened the coloring book up and on the first page, Tommy had it 
colored already, and underneath the picture was GET WELL NOW! THAT'S AN 
ORDER!!!!

I looked back at the colored picture, and it was Shagg with his left 
arm resting around Scooby's neck. I put the book down and got on to 
more important business, My Breakfast. I pulled the towel off the tray, 
and underneath were two syrup packages. Must be pancakes or French 
toast. As I was removing the cover off the plate, I was hoping it was 
French toast.

Nope, pancakes, scrambled eggs and sausages.

As I was eating, I heard Sherry come into the infirmary and was talking 
to Tommy out in the hallway. I couldn't make out most of what they were 
talking about, but a few words I did understand. As they continued 
talking I heard the word BATH.

I was thinking I hope Sherry's not going to give me a bath. Tommy 
giving me a bath wasn't to bad, besides, we are guys, an I knew Tommy 
real well.

Karen, my house mom, gave me a few baths when I first got to Mark 
Allen, and the one bath she gave me I'll never forget:

Cody, please go get undressed and take a shower.

"NO" I yelled at her.

"Cody, Please go take a shower now."

"NO, I'm going to take a shower and you can't make me!" I almost 
screamed back at her.

'Okay Cody, you don't have to take a shower.'

I thought I won that battle with her until she said: "OKAY CODY, YOU'LL 
BE GIVIN A BATH INSTEAD!"

She grabbed my left hand and almost dragged me from my bedroom, down 
the hallway to the bathroom. All the boys we passed in the hallway just 
stopped and watched her taking me to the bathroom, like I was a two 
year old. She took a towel off the counter and put it over her 
shoulder. She grabbed another towel and tossed it on the floor next to 
the tub.

"Raise your arms Young Man."

I raised my left arm up as high as I could, and she took my shirt off 
and then pulled my right arm out of its sleeve. She reached down and 
straightened the towel on the floor next to the tub.

"Cody lie down here now!"

I quickly lay down on the towel. She pulled my shoes off my feet 
without undoing the Velcro straps, then took my socks off. I looked 
over at the door to the hallway and some of the boys were watching her 
and me. She unfastened my pants and pulled them off of me and tossed 
them onto my shirt on the floor.

"Lift young man!"

I raised my rear and she pulled my plastic pants off of me. She 
unfastened my diaper pins as I lay there, then she picked me up under 
my arms and sat me in the tub. She turned the faucets to the bathtub on 
and went and got a washcloth and a bar of soap. After she turned the 
water off she starting washing me from my hair down. I was crying a 
little bit when I looked at the doorway and I think all the boys in the 
cottage were watching me now, being given a bath. When she was done 
scrubbing me, she made me stand up and she rinsed me off with the hand 
shower.

"Step out here young man!" mom said.

I did as I was told. As she dried me off, I could hear the boys 
snickering and laughing while they watched.

"Now, Let's get you dressed young man!" she said as she led me by my 
left hand out of the bathroom, past the other boys in the hall to the 
changing room.

"Up on the table NOW young man!"

She diapered me while most of the boys were watching me from the 
doorway. After she put my plastic pants on me , she sat me up on the 
table and said: "Tomorrow, you don't have to take a shower Cody, BUT I 
will be giving you a bath tomorrow night whether you like it or not!!" 
You can go watch T.V. with the other boys now Cody."

I hopped down off the table and ran to my bedroom and threw myself down 
on my bed and cried. I was so humiliated in front of the other boys, 
some only half my age. I could hear the other boys laughing and 
snickering at me while I lay on my bed crying.

I took a shower the next morning to wash the pee off of me, but that 
night,

"Cody, please come here."

I got off my chair in my bedroom and slowly walked to the bathroom. 
Karen was standing by the bathtub.

"Time for your bath Cody"

As I walked over to her I could hear some of the boys talking about 
watching me getting another bath.

"Okay Cody please raise your arms."

As I did, she took my shirt off of me, but gentler this time.

"Cody please sit down here" she said as she gently tapped the edge of 
the tub where she wanted me to sit. I sat down then she lifted my left 
foot and loosened the Velcro and took my shoe and sock off. I saw the 
other boys at the door watching me as she took my other shoe and sock 
off my foot.

"Cody will you please stand?"

I could hear the boys that were watching me start giggling as I stood 
there while she took my pants, plastic pants, and diaper off of me. She 
helped me step into the tub, and then I sat down. The tears were 
running down my face as I sat there, but I wasn't crying. She turned 
the bathtub faucets on and went and got the washcloth and soap. She 
looked at the boys at the doorway watching us and said: "Boys��WHO 
WANTS TO BE NEXT!!!"

I watched from the bathtub as the other boys took off running in 
different directions. Karen came back to the bathtub, and I looked up 
at her and started laughing softly, thinking about the sight of all 
those other boys trying to get away from there. Karen laughed a little 
too. She washed me like last night, but a lot softer and gentler this 
time, I stood up and she rinsed me off, then helped me out of the 
bathtub and dried me off. She took my left hand and led me out of the 
bathroom, down the hall to the changing room. We didn't see a single 
boy in the hallway on the way to the changing room. She helped me climb 
up onto the table and she diapered me.

"Cody, Will you please sit up?"

I sat up and let my legs hang off the table. I was staring down at the 
floor when she reached down to my chin and took it in her hand, and 
made me look up into her eyes, "Cody, tomorrow do you want to take a 
shower or get a bath?" "Shower" I said softly. "What Cody?" "Shower" I 
said a little louder. "Okay Cody, you may go and watch T.V. with the 
other boys now." I hopped down off the table and walked to my bedroom 
and put on a tee shirt before I went back to the T.V. room. When I 
walked in the T.V. room, some of the other boys started teasing me, 
calling me baby and saying wah�wah like a baby crying. Mohammad was 
sitting in the big lounge chair calling me baby. I looked at him and 
told him: "Mom told me to tell her which one of you guys wants her to 
give them a bath tomorrow night!" Mohammad stared at me petrified as he 
sat in the chair. The teasing stopped almost immediately. (Mom never 
told me that, but the other boys didn't know that.) I was using my 
thirteen year old brain in my eight year old size body, but acted like 
a four year old last night and got treated like a two year old baby by 
mom (Karen) for acting that way.

Mom was the Boss in cottage-A, not me. Me�I was just a stupid thirteen 
year old who needed a good lesson and got one,��..the hard way.

The last time mom (Karen) gave me a bath, I wanted and needed it��.

I woke up before the wake up bell on that Sunday morning. I lay there 
in my bed thinking about being able to leave Mark Allen and have lunch 
with my real mom. It would be the first time I'd seen her since I came 
to Mark Allen in June, almost two months ago. I was excited and 
couldn't sleep any longer. I looked at the clock on my chair wondering 
which clock was right, the clock the wake up bell was set to, or my 
digital clock on my chair. I watched as my clock turned five-fifty-nine 
A.M. and I started counting. When I got to eleven the wake up bell 
rang. I sat up in bed for a moment before I got up and went to the foot 
of my bed to take my plastic pants and diaper off. I went over and 
turned on the lights in my bedroom so I had more light in my room, then 
just the lights shining in from the hall. I looked out into the hallway 
and no one was there. I walked down the hall to the bathroom and took a 
shower to wash the pee off of me. I dried myself off and walked to the 
changing room kind of yelling towards mom's room (Karen's) that I was 
ready. I turned the light on and went over to the table and climbed up 
on it and laid back waiting for mom to show up. Mom walked in about 
thirty seconds later.

"You're a little early this morning Cody."

"My mom is coming to take me out shopping and to lunch today." I told 
her.

I raised my rear as mom placed the pre folded diaper under me and then 
pined the corners together. Mom slipped the plastic pants over my feet, 
up my legs and over my diaper, the she checked my leg and waist 
openings to make sure that the cloth diaper was tucked in. I sat up and 
put my feet over the side of the table and hopped down onto the floor 
and started to run back to my room.

"Hold it Cody, your showing in the rear."

I stopped and backed up and mom tucked the diaper in the rear into my 
plastic pants, then I was off again. Mom had always told us "No running 
in the hall" but she knew I was excited about seeing my real mom for 
the first time in a long time, that she didn't say a word. I quickly 
open the middle drawer of my dresser and took out a pair of pants. I 
sat on my bed and pulled the pants up as far as I could, then stood up 
and kicked my feet until me feet were out of the pant legs at the 
bottom. I pulled them the up rest of the way, over my diaper to my 
waist and fastened them closed with the Velcro closure.

Mom (Karen) had sewn some Velcro on some of my pants to make it easier 
for me to get dressed by myself. I had problems with getting the metal 
button thru the slot in the front of my pants most of the time, and mom 
wanted to make it easier for me to dress myself.

I took my blue tee shirt out of my dresser and pulled it up my right 
arm and then slipped my left arm into its sleeve and pulled my shirt up 
over my head and on. I sat back down on my bed and pulled my shoes out 
from under my bed and put yesterdays socks back on, then my shoes. I 
got up off my bed and made my bed as fast as I could.

I picked up the toys on the floor and tossed them into my closet so I 
didn't have to do it after breakfast. I grabbed my toothpaste and brush 
and went back to the bathroom to brush my teeth. David and Shawn were 
still in the shower messing around when mom came in an told them she 
was going to give them a bath if they couldn't behave in the shower. 
Shawn came out of the shower first, grabbed a towel off the counter and 
dried himself off. He tossed the towel in the hamper and as he was 
leaving the bathroom I saw he had diaper rash on his left rear. Shawn 
and David were bedwetters and they usually lined up in front of me at 
night to get a diaper put on for bed. It felt good to know that someone 
else got diaper rash and not just me. David dried himself off and as he 
left, I looked at his rear as he passed by, but he didn't have any 
signs of diaper rash. I rinsed my mouth out and grabbed my toothpaste 
and brush and walked back to my room and put them away. I turned off 
the light as I left my bed room to go line up at the back door for 
breakfast. I was the first one in line and as Justin lined up behind me 
as the breakfast bell rang. The other boys started lining up behind us 
and Justin. When I saw mom leading Shawn out of his bedroom by his hand 
to the end of the line I knew mom had seen the diaper rash on Shawn's 
rear by the expression on Shawn's face. Shawn liked to tease me every 
now and then by asking if I had a diaper rash on me yet. Shawn knew I 
wore a diaper all the time, but now I was smiling thinking about him. 
Mom said "Let's go" and we headed out the backdoor to the dining hall. 
I ate my breakfast in half the time I usually do because I wanted to 
get out of there, but I knew I had to wait for the rest of the guys 
from my cottage to finish first before we could leave the dining hall. 
Roger was the last one to finish eating and when he looked at mom, she 
said we could get up and leave now. I went out the dinning hall door 
and waited for Shawn to come out. When he did, I told him to take a 
good book to look at. Shawn looked at me and started crying. When mom 
came out of the dinning hall and saw Shawn crying, she asked him what 
was wrong. Shawn told her what I said to him and then mom gave me a 
dirty look. I knew I shouldn't have teased Shawn like that, but he had 
it coming. I got to thinking that I WAS thirteen years old, almost 
twice as old as Shawn and I shouldn't have said what I said to him.

When you got diaper rash in cottage-A mom made you strip, from the 
waist down and lay on the changing table. She put medicine cream on 
your front and rear and made you lay there on the changing table on 
your stomach one hour with a heat lamp aimed at your diaper rash.() The 
diaper rash I had the last time was bad. I had to lay there for one 
hour each morning for three mornings in a row before my rash was gone. 
Shawn came in one morning while I was laying there and said "What, baby 
got a little diaper rash on his butt!" I was mad then, and now I was 
getting even. Then I thought he's just a little kid and I'm not. I was 
sorry I had teased him now. When I got back to the cottage, mom grabbed 
my arm and told me I shouldn't have teased him because I was a big boy 
and he's just a little child. I went an got my coloring book and 
crayons and took them into him so he'd have something to do while he 
was laying there on his stomach, and I told him I was sorry.

I went to the T.V. room, and mom came in and put Lady and the Tramp on 
so we could watch it. It was almost nine-thirty when I looked at the 
clock. I started to leave the T.V. room when mom told me to come over 
to her. She told me that when my mom got there, I was to bring my mom 
back to cottage-A to meet her, and get my pass so I could leave Mark 
Allen. I walked down to the front gate to wait for my mom to get here, 
and Marcus the security guard was in the guard shed.

I met Marcus the first Sunday I was at Mark Allen. I got bored watching 
T.V. in the cottage, so I thought I'd go outside and look around. I 
ended up down near the front gate when Marcus came out of the guard 
shed and said to me: "Where do you think your going young man?"

"Just looking." I told him.

"You need a pass to go beyond this point!"

"What's a pass?"

Marcus bent down a little and with his finger motioned me to come to 
him. As I walked over, Marcus sat down on the chair in the guard shed. 
When I walked into the shed, Marcus turned me, picked me up and sat me 
on his lap.

"This my boy is a pass, see."

I looked down and Marcus had a little blue card in his hand.

"You see, the boys full name goes here, and the full name of the person 
who is going to take them off the Mark Allen grounds goes here, see. 
The day they can leave goes here, the time they can leave goes here, 
and the time they have to be back at Mark Allen goes over here. Every 
boy who leaves Mark Allen must have a pass like this one to leave or 
come back onto Mark Allen grounds."

"Can I have a pass?"

"Nope, only an adult can ask and get a pass for a boy, by the way, whom 
am I speaking with?"

"Cody."

"Cody?"

"Cody James."

"And what cottage are you in Cody James?"

"Cottage-A

"Nice to meet you Cody James, My name is Marcus. Doing anything for a 
while?"

"Nope."

"Care to give me a hand checking passes this morning Cody?"

"SURE!"

Marcus was checking the list of names on a clipboard and the time they 
could leave and had to be back by Marcus was checking to make sure 
there were no mistakes on the list when the first car drove in the gate 
and stopped at the shed. Marcus asked the lady who she was, then asked 
her who she was picking up. When her answers matched the list on the 
clipboard, Marcus gave her the blue card and a red plastic card that 
was numbered and told her that she was to put the red card on the 
dashboard of her car to let everyone know the car was allowed on Mark 
Allen grounds. I helped Marcus until it was almost lunchtime that day.

I stepped up on the cement pier that the guard shed was sitting on and 
walked into the shed.

"Hi Marcus, need a hand today?"

"Oh Hi Cody, not doing anything today?"

"Not till ten, then my mom is supposed to be here."

Marcus looked at me with a surprised look on him.

"How did you get a pass Cody?"

"Stole it." I said to Marcus joking.

"Lets see if your names on the list."

Marcus started looking down the list, and the further down he went, the 
more scared I got thinking my name wasn't on it.

"Oh�here it is, Sir Cody James."

"Huh?"

"Sir Cody James, see."

I was looking at the list from about two feet away and couldn't read 
the name Marcus had his finger pointing to, so I moved closer to get a 
better look and then Marcus grabbed me and started tickling me and said 
"Gottcha Cody" He tickled me until I got away.

"Gonna get you for that Marcus"

"Give it your best shot Cody!"

"Mind if I wait here till my mom comes?"

"Sure, be good to have someone to talk too."

I went back in the shed and sat on Marcus's lap until the first car 
showed up. I thought the first car was going to be my mom's for sure, 
but then the cars and trucks started pouring in. I waited, hoping to 
see her soon, driving into Mark Allen in the old, beat up car she 
drives. When it was twenty minutes after ten, I got to thinking, twenty 
minutes of my four hour vacation from Mark Allen was gone, I needed to 
go over to the administration building and see if John had gotten any 
calls.

"Be back in a minute Marcus, gonna check with John and see if anyone's 
called."

Marcus gave a quick wave as I hopped down off the cement pier and 
walked across the road and went into the administration building. John 
was sitting at Miss. Oseeda's desk reading a magazine.

"John, anyone called?'

"No Cody, not today since I've been here."

"Be over at the shed incase" I said.

I walked back to the shed, went in and sat down on the chair. There 
were a few cars in line and Marcus was outside checking them thru. I 
kept looking and hoping that my mom would be the very next car. I 
looked at the little clock in the shed and it was ten-forty-five A.M. 
My pass was good from ten A.M. to two P.M. that day, and almost an hour 
was gone. I didn't have to be back at Mark Allen today until naptime in 
our cottage was almost over with, if my mom would show up.

In cottage-A we had to take a nap for two hours after lunch every day 
during summertime, and on Saturdays and Sundays during the rest of the 
year. No exceptions, even if you were too old to take a nap like me. 
The exceptions were: you were on an off grounds trip, like to the beach 
or zoo, or you had a day or weekend pass. The two-hour naptime didn't 
start until all the boys in Cottage-A were on their beds with no shoes 
on their feet, then mom would start watching the clock.

I was going to miss naptime today if my mom would just show up, I kept 
thinking. Marcus came back into the shed and sat down and pulled me up 
into his lap. One car came down the street and saw it was not a thru 
street and he turned around and went back the way he came. Marcus let 
me go out to the street and look down it a dozen times just in case. I 
sat on Marcus's lap with my head against his chest wondering if my mom 
had lied to me and she wasn't coming�never ever coming to get me. What 
if she's dead and they wont tell me. All I knew was I wanted my mommy 
now!

The lunch bell rang, and I got off of Marcus's lap and started walking 
back to the cottage.

"Good lunch today Cody, Sloppy Joe's"

I didn't say a word, I just kept walking back to the cottage slowly. 
The boys from cottage-A were coming down the path on their way to the 
dinning hall and Karen was following them when see saw me.

"Cody, c'mon, lets go eat lunch and maybe she'll be here by the time 
you finish"

I didn't listen to her, I just walked past her back to my cottage, in 
thru the back door, down the hall to my bedroom. I laid down on my bed 
and cried.

She lied to me. She doesn't love me. She doesn't even like me! She 
hates me! She hates me! She hates me!!!

As I lay there on my stomach crying so hard, I had to go number two. 
The HELL with it and I pushed so hard that my diaper was filled in 
seconds with poop. I kept thinking: Mommy doesn't even want me, a big 
bad baby! I HATE EVERYONE!!!

I cried so hard, I went to sleep hoping that I would die!

"Cody?"

"Cody?����feel better?"

I opened my eyes and Karen was knelling there looking me in the eyes 
and running her fingers through my hair, I turned my head away from her 
towards the wall and put my left thumb in my mouth and started sucking 
on it for comfort.

Cody.�they are trying to get a hold of your mother. John's trying to 
get her on the phone"

"Cody.�.We'll find out why she didn't come." Karen added.

I thought to my self: She doesn't want me anymore! That's why she 
didn't come! Mommy doesn't want a baby that wets all the time! She 
wants someone with two good arms, not just one! Mommy just doesn't want 
me anymore.

Karen sat on my bed and kept running her fingers thru my hair slowly 
and talking to me softly.

Slowly, Karen turned me on my back and said "Cody, I know what will 
make you feel better"

She sat me up in bed and then pulled my limp legs over the edge and 
stood me up. She took my left hand and walked me down the hallway to 
the bathroom slowly while I was still sucking my thumb. She led me over 
to the tub, reached down and started the water flowing into it. Karen 
pulled my blue tee shirt off of me then I put my thumb back in my 
mouth. Some of the boys were staring at us thru the bathroom doorway 
and when she saw them there see said "You boys better had find 
something to do, or else." Karen then took my shoes off while I stood 
there. She pulled the Velcro loose and took my pants down an off of me, 
then she pulled my plastic pants down and off, then undid my diaper 
pins and took my soiled diaper off, rolled it up and wiped my rear as 
clean as she could with it. After she put it down on the pile of 
clothes Karen helped me into the water and sat me down. She went over 
to the shower and grabbed the baby wash I use in the shower every 
morning and night, poured some on a washcloth and came back to the tub, 
knelt down and started washing me, softly, and gently. While I sat 
there, she talked to me very quietly. Karen stood me up and rinsed me 
off very slowly then dried me off. She led me with my thumb in my mouth 
from the bathroom, down the hallway past the T.V. room into the 
changing room. The boys in the T.V. room were staring at me as I walked 
past but I didn't give a damn. Karen diapered me then she led me back 
to my bedroom and put me in bed.

"Cody do you think you might feel like eating dinner later?"

I didn't answer. I didn't move. I didn't blink my eyes. I just lay 
there staring up at the ceiling sucking on my thumb, the only friend I 
had left in the whole world.

Karen walked over to the door, turned the light off, then closed the 
door behind her. Karen never permitted any bedroom door ever to be 
closed, never ever under any circumstance, but she closed my bedroom 
door for me.

Awhile later I heard the dinner bell ring. I just stared up at the 
ceiling watching the shadows on the ceiling, sucking my thumb when I 
heard the door slowly open. I didn't look at the person come in I just 
stared up. Shawn had brought my coloring book and crayons back and he 
put the on my bed next to me, then he walked out of my room closing the 
door behind him. I heard the backdoor of the cottage close as the last 
boy left to go eat dinner. I closed my eyes slowly and went to sleep.

Cody������Cody����.

I opened my eyes, staring at the ceiling, My thumb is still comforting 
me in my mouth.

"Your mom's just called Cody."

I moved a little to let Karen know I was listening.

"Your Mom's car broke down on the freeway this morning, that's why see 
didn't make it to pick you up."

I turn my head to make sure someone was really there and that I was not 
having a dream. I took my thumb out of my mouth, "Why didn't she call?"

"She said the C.H.P. didn't see her until about one and by the time she 
was towed to the service station it was going on two."

"But why didn't she call?"

"She said she tried but couldn't get thru, guess John was on the phone 
trying to get a hold of her."

I was listening more intently now.

"The service station she was towed to didn't have the right parts to 
repair her car, so they towed her car to another station, but it had 
closed early because it was Sunday.

I continued listening and looking her straight in the eyes hoping that 
I could see in them if she was telling me the truth.

"When she got to the other service station, she tried and tried calling 
but couldn't get thru Cody. The telephone lines here at Mark Allen were 
knocked out due to an accident up on the highway, and John didn't know 
it. The phones weren't working from six pm until a little while ago. 
She said she loves you Cody and misses you dearly. She's gong to take 
tomorrow off from work and take you out and no ones going to stop her, 
not even Mr. Gee." Karen said as she ran her fingers thru my hair.

I lay there not knowing what to believe anymore.

"Your mom said she's going to call Mr. Gee early and tell him she's was 
coming to pick you up at ten sharp!"

I turned my head towards the wall because I didn't want Karen to see me 
crying. Karen sat down on the bed beside me and rubbed my back until I 
went back to sleep.

The wake up bell was ringing as I turned slowly onto my back. Monday, I 
wonder if she's really coming today? Trip to the beach today, and 
almost half of cottage-A is going. Means those boys who go don't have 
to take a nap today. Lucky guys I thought.

I sat up in bed with a lot less enthusiasm then I did yesterday 
morning, after all, it was just another morning to me. I got up out of 
bed and went down to the bed pad like I've done a million times before. 
I took my plastic pants and diaper off and left them on the bed pad.

I looked down at my penis as I stood there on the bed pad. Wish I could 
make it stop leaking pee all the time. Wish I could wear regular 
underwear like the rest of the boys in my cottage. Yeah, right, regular 
underwear like Michael's Spider man underwear. I wonder what it feels 
like to wear boxers? Will I ever be able to control my penis? Ever? 
Well I better go and wash the pee off me, in case my mom does comes by. 
As I got to the bathroom, Shawn and David rushed past me on the way to 
the shower. I entered the bathroom, then heard the two showers come on 
full blast. Damn, now I have to wait for them to finish. I moved the 
towels on the counter back against the wall and hopped up and sat on 
the counter. I started swinging my feet back and forth as I looked down 
and started wondering how much space was between the bottom of my feet 
and the floor of the bathroom. Must be about fourteen inches, no, maybe 
sixteen inches.

"C'mon guys, hurry up so I can take a shower." I yelled at them.

Better not sit on the counter I thought to myself. Mom said it's a 
shelf not a seat.

If it were a seat, it would have a backrest I remember her saying. Last 
thing I need is to do is get mom mad at me and ground me. I hopped back 
down onto the floor and was pacing the floor waiting for Shawn or David 
to finish I heard one shower turn off and Shawn walks past me and takes 
a towel off the counter and starts drying his hair. I walk around him 
until I can see his rear.

"Any more heat lamp?" I ask.

"No."

"Shawn, next time your underwear get wet while your playing in the 
sand, come in and take your wet underwear off and put on some dry 
underwear, then you won't get diaper rash again."

"Okay Cody." Shawn said.

I walked to the shower thinking about the last time I had diaper rash. 
I got up on morning and my rear was itching. I took my diaper off and 
went it to take a shower, but I didn't. I only pretended so mom would 
think I did. When I got to the changing room, I turned the light switch 
on but no light came on. Mom came in an found out the light bulb was 
burned out, so she changed me in the dark room and couldn't see the 
diaper rash. After breakfast, David, Shawn, Carl and me were playing in 
the sand when we decided to wrestle on the wet grass. When lunch time 
came, our clothes were soaked and dirty. We went in and changed our 
clothes for lunch. When it was naptime after lunch, mom came by and 
asked me if I needed a change. I told her "No", but I lied because I 
didn't want the naptime clock to be reset to two hours because mom had 
to change me. When mom saw my diaper rash that night, she was mad. 
"Next time you think you have diaper rash Cody Matthew James, I want 
you to tell me, immediately, understand?"

"Yes" I answered her.

"Diaper rash is something you can not mess around with. It can become 
very serious, understand young man?"

"Yes" I said.

I walked past the shower David was in and stepped into the last one. I 
turned the water on and it felt good. As I was thinking about what I 
had told Shawn I realized that a seven year old would have never said 
that to another seven year old. Only a thirteen year old would have. I 
felt good. I then closed my eyes, tilted my head back and let the water 
hit me in the face and run down my front and back.

"Cody, you're running late!" mom said.

I turned the shower off and walked to the counter, took a towel off the 
pile and dried myself off. Mom was leaning against the door frame of 
the bathroom door watching me and waiting for me.

"Might have to let you eat breakfast in your briefs."

I looked up at her as I got to the door. She was smiling a little and 
then I knew she was kidding.

I didn't care if someone saw me wearing only a diaper and plastic 
pants. I didn't care if everyone at Mark Allen saw me wearing only 
diapers and plastic pants, as long as I was only two years old, I 
thought.

After we got to the changing room, mom checked me quickly for diaper 
rash powered my diaper area, diapered me and handed me my plastic 
pants. I hopped off the table and put the plastic pants on and then 
headed for the door.

"Hold it young man."

I knew that tone, what did I do this time I thought

I turned and walked back to her slowly, Was she going to spank me for 
something I did? I don't remember doing anything bad, lately. I stopped 
when I got to her my eyes staring at the floor. She took my chin in her 
hand and made me look her in the eyes.

"Cody, I want you back here at the cottage no later then nine-thirty, 
understand?"

"Yes mom, why?"

"I thought you might feel more comfortable wearing a disposable diaper 
today while you are out with your mom."

Mom had told me one time that cloth diapers were cheep. Disposable 
diapers were expensive. Disposable diapers were to be used for school 
only Disposable diapers were to be used for emergencies only, and 
disposable diapers were to be used only on special occasions�����

When I got to the last line of the rules on wearing diapers, I looked 
in her eyes, and her eyes said yes back to me, I hugged her as hard as 
I could and then WALKED back to my room to get dressed. School didn't 
start until September and this was not an emergency, it�..it was a 
special occasion, and then I knew for real, that my mommy was really 
coming today to take me to lunch!

Most of the boys were lined up when the breakfast bell rang. Mom wasn't 
even at the back of the line yet, so that meant I had about five 
minutes to get dressed. Mom likes to start at the back of the line of 
boys, combing hair, checking zippers, buttoning shirts and checking 
faces for dirt as she made her way to to front of the line, then she 
would turn and check on the way to the back of the line to make sure 
she didn't miss anything on any of the boys.

As she turned to face the front of the line, I slipped into line right 
in front of her. She looked down on me and I smiled my biggest smile at 
her.

When Roy told us to line up to be served our food, Roy saw I was 
excited and patted me on my back as I passed by him. I was too excited 
to eat so I grabbed a cereal bowl and small plate and headed for the 
end of the serving counter. There was a rack with individual servings 
of cereal. I took one of my favorites, Fruit Loops. I waited for all 
the boys and mom to get back to their tables before we can start 
eating. I ate my food fast and had to wait for the others to finish 
eating their breakfast. Kyle is the last one to finish this time. When 
mom says we can leave, I walk to the door, and when I'm out, I run the 
hundred feet to my cottage. When I get to my bedroom I look around. 
Gotta close those dresser drawers so my mom won't think I'm a slob. 
Lets see, better pick up the bed pad and put last nights diaper in the 
pail. Maybe Karen will let me keep my diaper pail in the changing room 
so my bedroom don't smell so much like pee. I'd better check under my 
bed and make sure all my things are picked up. Need to straighten my 
bed better. Must straighten up my desk. My bedroom still smells like 
pee, if I open the windows maybe the smell will go away. Better put my 
toothpaste and brush in the drawer, no, better brush my teeth again 
before my mom comes. I'll wait. Lets see, bed made, desk straightened , 
oops, diaper pail. I forgot, its Monday, laundry day.

I run the diaper pail down the hall to the changing room and put it 
beside the laundry cart. Mom always puts my wet diapers in a large 
plastic bag with the other diapers some of the other boys wore at night 
because they still wet the bed.

I'll leave my pail right here and pick it up later after my mom's left. 
Remember Cody, be on time for mom to get you changed, I tell myself. 
Better get back and make sure my room is clean.

I stand in the doorway of my bedroom looking to make sure I didn't miss 
anything.

What if my real mom wants to look in my closet? Better clean it out. I 
open the doors and it's a mess inside. Lets see, seven o'clock, I've 
got a few minutes to straighten my closet up.

I sit down on the floor in front of my closet and rake everything out 
of the closet onto the floor in front of me.

Lets see, put these coloring books up on my desk in a neat pile. Put my 
cars and trucks nice and neatly on the floor of the closet over here. 
(That's were my slipper socks were! I thought someone stole them.) 
Better put these in my dresser in the top drawer. Lets see, here's that 
old clock I got when I was in my last foster home. Better keep that, 
lots of good screws and other hardware left on it. Plastic pants, must 
have forgotten those a long time ago. Remember to drop off at the 
changing room. If mom (Karen) saw these, she'd get mad because I forgot 
to put them in the laundry a long time ago. Beach towel, better fold 
that and hang it up on the clothes rod up there. All this dirt, how 
does all this dirt get in here? Better get the broom and sweep it 
up���� in a minute��.There!��..Finally done, nice and neat.

Almost seven-thirty, two more hours before my diaper change. Wonder if 
mom's changed a lot? Naw. Mom never changes. She always looks the same. 
I wonder if Cindy might come. Naw,�She hates my guts. I wish I was 
older then my sister. Think I'll go watch T.V. for awhile, then I'll be 
right here when Karen says its time to get changed.

I walk to my door and look over my shoulder to make sure everything's 
nice and neat when I show my mom my room when she gets here. I walk 
down the hall to the T.V. room. Barney's on, but I sit down anyway. 
When barney goes off, mom brings in a tape for us to watch as long as 
we are quiet. It's cartoon cavalcade number six. These are better then 
just the Tom and Jerry and Bugs Bunny tapes. All the cartoons are all 
different like the Road Runner, Casper, and Spider man.

"Cody!"

"Time already?" I look at the clock and its nine-thirty already.

Good, means thirty minutes till I see her since a long, long time ago.

I get off the sofa and walk across the hall to the changing room. Moms 
waiting for me so I hop up on the table an mom pulls my pants down.

I like wearing the disposable diapers better then cloth because they 
don't make my pants stick out as far, but the baby designs on them make 
me feel like a real little kid. They should have racing cars or space 
ships instead of teddy bears. Disposables are softer and more 
comfortable to wear then cloth, and easier to put on and take off too.

"Done Cody"

I look down not believing her. All I need to do is hop down off the 
table, pull my pants back up and fasten them. Wished mom had come 
yesterday so she could have seen the cargo's Tommy got me up at Sears.

"Can I go down to the administration building and wait for my mom now, 
please?"

"Sure Cody, but remember I have your pass here so you and your mom need 
to come back here to get it, Okay?"

"Okay."

I take off out of the changing room, out the front door of my cottage 
and down towards the admin building. Be there in two or three seconds 
the way I run�maybe a little longer. When I get there, I check the 
parking lot to see if my mom's car is parked in it and don't see it 
yet. Maybe I'll go in and say Hi to Miss Oseeda the receptionist here 
at Mark Allen. I talk to her for a few minutes when I hear a car pull 
in the parking lot. It's black, a Toyota, big dent in the rear, it's my 
mommy. I rush out and down the steps across the parking lot to her car 
and as she opens her door and then I go flying into her open arms. My 
knees land in her lap and I look into her eyes and hug and kiss and 
kiss her over and over again. I rest my head on her chest and shoulder 
crying softly. I'm hugging her so tight, and she's hugging me too, that 
no one in the entire world would have enough strength to ever pull us 
apart. I hold her a long, long time, and she holds me too.

She does want me. She still needs me, and now I know for sure that she 
really, really loves me, and I love her too!

We finally get out of the car and walk over to the administration 
building to get a red card for her car. I show my mom where to put the 
red card on the dash like Marcus showed me. Finally we head for my 
cottage to get MY pass. When we get to the cottage, mom is there to 
meet us. I introduce mom to mom, I mean mom to my mom I mean my real 
mom to my cottage mom. They shake hands briefly and start talking about 
me. Every time I hear 'Cody' they both look at me, and I start blushing 
a little.

"Cody, you better go get your blue book bag on your bed before you go 
on your pass."

I look up at Karen.

"Just in case Cody."

"Oh, just in case?" I said back to Karen.

Karen blinks at me.

I go and get the blue book bag with the two disposable diapers inside 
and walk back to them.

"Here's your pass Cody, and I want you to read it and make sure its all 
in order" Karen says to me

I took the pass and looked at it to make sure. My names right, Cody 
Matthew James, Mom's name is right, Kelly James, Date is right and 
Monday, that's right too.

Time I can leave at is ten A.M. that's right, time to be back at Mark 
Allen���three P.M��..

I look up at Karen, and she winked at me. I run over and hug Karen 
tight.

"Thought you could use an extra hour with your mom today Cody."

I give Karen another thank you hug and walk out the cottage with my 
real mommy.

"Cody, What would you like to do first?" my real mom asks me.

"FOOD!" I answered.

"McDonalds?"

I hugged her again, and she knew the answer.

We go thru the drive thru so we can eat in the car alone, together.

I order the Big Mac and large fries and large coke, and mom orders fish 
sandwich and fries and coffee.

My mom took me to the mall and as we entered we passed by Kay Bee toys 
and walked around the mall looking at the stores and checking to see 
what they have. Mom sees the J.C. Penny, and we go inside.

"Need to get you a pair of pants you can play in Cody."

We go by the boys department to the little boys department. Mom knows 
I'm about a size eight pant and tells me to get a pair that I really 
like. I don't like shopping in the little boys department, but they 
start size ten in the big boys department so I look until I 
see��cargo's. I like cargo's because of all the pockets on them. I find 
a pair as mom walks up behind me. I turn and show her the pair I want 
and she takes them from me and looks them over before she puts them 
back on the rack. I look at her, then she reaches over to another rack 
and takes a pair of cargo's off the rack and hands them to me. I look 
them over, and mom is right. I love these cargo's the best! The legs 
zip off. Now I have a pair of pants and shorts, all in one. I hug my 
mom again thinking, Mom does know best. My mom makes me try them on 
before she buys them for me. As we leave J.C. Penny mom asks me if I 
know where there might be a toy store at around there, because she 
wants to buy a toy for her to play with. I know she's teasing me, and I 
almost drag her back to Kay Bee. She holds up one finger and I know 
that means one toy! I look up and down the isles looking for a long 
time before I find what I want. A little remote control car with 
batteries, and its cheap and on sale. My mom still doesn't make that 
much money yet in her new job, and I know from her letters she sends me 
that money is tight. I show her the car and I see her eyes say Yes. She 
pays for the car and as we are leaving Kay Bee, I look up at the clock 
over the front door and my heart sinks. Two-thirty P.M. Our fun, fun 
day almost over. She sees the clock now and looks down to me, and I can 
see the tears in her eyes, and I know she sees mine.

"One more place to go, Cody, then we need to go back to Mark Allen."

I walk slowly back to the car with her.

We stop by the donut shop and go inside. The guy behind the counter 
asks her how many donuts is she going to purchase, and all my mom says 
is LOTS.

When we get back to Mark Allen boys home we just sit in the car for 
awhile.

Cody, Do you need a change before I leave?"

I feel my front an crotch and its almost dry.

"Yes" I answer.

She gets out of the car and I follow her. She opens the back door of 
the car and I climb in and lay down on the back seat. She takes a 
diaper out of my book bag and changes my diaper in the back seat.

"Almost three Cody."

I sit up on the back car seat and hug my mommy as hard as I can, not 
wanting to let go ever, but I do.

Miss. Oseeda walks up as I climb out of the back of the car with my 
book bag and the things my mom bought me today. Mom takes out a large 
brown bag and gives it to Miss. Oseeda and then gives her the donuts we 
bought. Mom whispers something to Miss. Oseeda, then my mom knelt down 
in front of me and starts catching the tears falling off my cheeks.

"I'm taking these home with me today, so you will be there with me 
Cody."

I knew what she meant.

My mom kissed me on both cheeks and hugged me one last time before she 
closed the back door of the car and climbed in the front seat and 
closed the car door

" I love you and miss you Cody" she said.

Miss. Oseeda put her hand on my shoulder as mom left.

My mom stopped at the gate and put the red plastic card in the box, 
then turned right and was gone.

Miss. Oseeda then helped me walk back to the cottage.

As we entered, Karen was there to meet us. Miss. Oseeda told her the 
donuts were for all the boys in cottage-A for snack time tonight before 
bed. Karen asked how my day was and I couldn't answer.

"I need to take a nap" was the only words I could choke out of my mouth 
as I went to my room.

I sat down on my bed and took the pants out and looked at them. I 
neatly folded them and placed them on the pillow on my bed. I got up 
and put my car on the desk then Miss Oseeda came into my room.

"Cody. Your mom said these are for you just in case." Miss. Oseeda said 
as she handed me the big brown bag then Miss. Oseeda left. I looked 
down in the bag, then I put the bag on the floor and pulled out the 
plastic package that was inside.

YOUTH SIZE (Small) twelve Briefs I read on the package. I looked at the 
picture and it was disposable diapers, not baby diapers, but youth 
size, and there was no teddy bears on them. Tears were falling harder 
now. I put them in my middle dresser drawer, closed it and went and 
laid down on my bed, my head on my new pants my mommy just bought me.

I thought I got to tell Karen that those diapers were not to be used 
for school or emergencies, they were to be used on special occasions 
only, and the only special occasion I could think of, was only with my 
mommy.

END OF CHAPTER THREE

CHAPTER FOUR
Still In The Infirmary

Sherry entered my room with a large smile on her.

"How's breakfast this morning Cody?"

"Good" I

"Looks like your almost done. Need a change yet?"

"In a minute, as soon as I finish my juice."

I put the straw in my mouth and finished the orange juice that was left 
in my cup.

"Sherry?"

"What Cody?"

"Why did Tommy take off today?"

"His mom needed to go to the hospital for minor surgery."

"For what?"

"Cataracts in her eyes."

"When will Tommy be back?"

"Monday night"

"Sherry?"

"Yes."

"Are you going to give me a bath?"

"Only if you want one, Tommy said it was up to you."

Tommy had left it up to me! I thought. He's letting me decide.

"Cody, need to take your temp. again. Tommy didn't write it down on 
your chart before he left."

I turned my head and Sherry took my temp. again.

"Ninety-nine even, temps coming down Cody." Sherry continued "Are you 
thirsty yet Cody?"

I looked at her and knew she saw me finish off my orange juice just a 
minute ago.

"No, not really." I told her.

"Too bad, but you still need to take your medicine."

Sherry handed me the little cup from my bed-table and I swallowed it in 
one and a half gulps.

"Let me clean this breakfast mess up first, and then I'll give you a 
quick change Cody."

"Okay."

"Tommy's mom going to be alright?"

"Yeah, just minor surgery so she see can see better�. Be right back 
Cody."

Cataracts I thought. I heard adults talking about them but I never 
quite knew what they were. I hope she's alright after her surgery.

The remote for the T.V. jumped into my hand saying 'use me'.

Saturday morning, cartoon time I thought. Only the best of the best 
were on.

I soon found out that there were more then I could watch. When a 
commercial came on, next channel 'Please', until that cartoon was 
interrupted by another commercial, then on to the next cartoon.

Sherry interrupted my viewing by walking in with a new stack of 
prefolds.

"Ready?"

"Yeah."

As Sherry changed me I saw here looking at the brace on my arm. I 
wonder what she's thinking?�.. Should I tell her what it's for?

"Sherry?"

"Yes Cody.'

"It's my arm brace" I told her and continued:

"Doctor Osaka had it made for me when I was seven years old. It's to 
keep my fingers from curling up and the muscles in my hand and fingers 
stretched out."

"Oh"

"Yeah, gotta wear it until Osaka figures out what to do with my hand."

"I need to take your PJ bottoms off of you so I get some new plastic 
pants on you."

"Okay"

Sherry pulled my PJ pants off and took the plastic pants off too, and 
then she put my PJ bottoms back on my feet.

"Forget something?" I asked her.

"No. got some new plastic pants for you Cody."

I watched as she reached into the pocket of her smock and pull out the 
little package. I cold tell that they were plastic pants by the picture 
on the package and by the name Gerber.

"Thought I'd pick up some new ones at the store for you and found these 
type.

Sherry opened the package and displayed one of the white plastic pants.

"Think they will work?" I asked Sherry.

"Why shouldn't they?"

"I sleep on my stomach most of the time, and, well, you know."

"Let's give them a try, and if they don't work out, you can use them 
for school."

I raised my rear and Sherry slipped the opened plastic pants under me. 
She pulled the front of the pant up between my legs to my stomach and 
fastened the snaps at the waist. She fastened the snaps at my legs then 
the snaps in the middle of the pant.

"Was Tommy mad?" I asked Sherry.

"Yeah, a little."

"Tommy doesn't want me to wear the same plastic pants more then two 
days in a row. He was mad at me the most because he had told me before 
not to do it." I told her.

"Yeah, Tommy's a good guy and I should have asked him about them before 
he left last Saturday."

I looked down at the new plastic pants and thought I'd have some fun 
with Sherry.

"What, No yellow ducks, no planes trains or cars printed on my wittle 
plastic pants?"

"Cody Matthew James, I had the printed plastic pants in my hand at the 
store and asked myself, What would Cody prefer, The plain white ones, 
or the printed ones, so if you want the printed ones, I'll pick them up 
tonight after Tommy gets back���."

The way Sherry carried on I knew she was pulling my leg about the 
printed plastic pants, but when she said, tonight, Tommy gets back, I 
knew something was up.

"Tommy's going to be back tonight?"

Sherry stood there, and with the expression on her face, I could see 
she didn't quite know how to answer my question.

"Ah�.Well�..If you tell Tommy anything,�..I know where you live 
Cody,��so don't mention anything I'm about to tell you to Tommy, 
understand?"

I nodded yes.

Tommy's dad was a Major in the U.S.Marines before Tommy was born. 
Tommy's mother was a seamstress and owned her own shop."

"What's a seamstress?" I interrupted.

"A seamstress is someone who designs and makes clothing for other 
people��anyway, When Tommy's dad retired from the marines, he found out 
how boring retirement really was and talked his wife, Tommy's mother, 
into retiring from her bridal shop. They traveled together until 
Tommy's dad passed away about�two years ago, I think. Well anyway, she 
got board, Tommy coming by less and less, and spending more time here 
at Mark Allen. One day a boy arrived at Mark Allen and the only clothes 
he had to wear were the clothes he had on. Tommy scrounged up more 
clothes for him to wear but most were too big for him. He was thin and 
small, so Tommy talked his mother into making altercations to the 
clothes so he would look good when he went to school. Tommy's mother 
had so much fun doing it, that she talked other wives at the V.F.W. 
into making clothing and even stuffed toys for underprivileged 
children. Now they make clothing for orphanages, children's homes and 
even for foster children now. When Tommy stopped by here last Sunday, 
he saw you sleeping there, warm and comfortable in the red blanket 
sleeper. He watched you Cody for over ten minutes. He left and went 
over to your cottage and asked Karen how many boys there had winter 
pajamas to wear. Karen figured only about half of the boys did. Karen 
said she wished all of you did, because she walks up and down the hall 
at night, sometimes twelve times a night tucking and arm back under the 
blanket, or a foot and even pulling the blanket up over their shoulders 
to keep the boys warm. Karen said to Tommy, 'I wish I could keep the 
blankets on them at night'. Tommy talked his mom into making pajamas 
for all the boys in cottage-A and some extras for the infirmary J.I.C.

"J.I.C.?" I repeated to Sherry.

"Just in case." Sherry answered.

Tommy and his mother was doing all of this for me and the other guys in 
cottage-A.

I didn't know if I'd cry when Tommy tried to surprise me tonight.

"What time is Tommy supposed to be here?"

"Knowing Tommy, Ten minutes ago to after dinner tonight." Sherry 
answered.

As Sherry left I didn't know what to do now. channel surf or color. I 
ended up doing some of both.

As I was about to finish my forth picture in my coloring book, the 
lunch bell rang. If I strain my neck, maybe I can see who is going to 
lunch today from my cottage I thought. All I could see was the top of 
the monkey bars over the bottom edge of the window. I got out of bed 
and pushed the chair next to the window and climbed up on it. Now I 
could see everything. The jungle gym, swings, and the neat sand I have 
missed so much in the past few days. The boys were coming out from 
behind the cottage now and Shawn was leading them down the path to the 
dining hall. It felt so good to see something new other the four walls 
of the room and the items the walls held within. I counted the guys as 
they passed out of view behind the edge on the wall that was part of 
the infirmary. Eleven boys and one house mom.

"Cody Matthew James"

I knew that tone, the tone of: I told you not to get out of bed tone.

"Cody, I told you not to get out of bed."

"I just��I just had to see the guys." I told her.

As she walked over to me, I could see on her face that she understood.

"Sherry, see the first, second, third, fourth, fifth, sixth window over 
there, that's my room. The first window over there is where Tommy and 
John sleep. And see the last window way, way down there, that's mom, I 
mean Karen's room."

"Time to get back in bed Cody, need a lift?"

"Sure" I said as I put my left arm around Sherry's neck then she swept 
my feet out from under me.

"Think you can carry me all the way back to my bed?" I asked her.

"No sweat Cody, I practiced with my three younger brothers."

"You have three brothers?"

"Yes, Ricky, Jason, and Stevie."

" How old are they?"

"Stevie is almost nineteen, Jason is sixteen, and Ricky is twelve."

"So your older then them?"

"By a few years."

"Do you like them?"

"Nope�.I love them" Sherry says as she tosses me back on my bed then 
adds "Like I love you. Now you stay put while I'm gone to lunch, you 
hear?"

I giggle a "yes" as Sherry tickles me while she pulls the blanket back 
up over me.

"Fish sticks for lunch today, want any Cody?"

"With ketchup?"

"With ketchup."

As Sherry leaves, I wish I had a sister like her.

Twelve noon, I wonder what cartoons are on now. I start channel surfing 
again, Lucy- black and white, college basketball, college basketball, 
movie.

"Hi guy."

I jump being startled so suddenly.

"Tommy?"

"Give that kid on the bed a lollypop for the right answer!" Tommy says 
as he sticks his head around the corner of the doorframe.

"Tommy, you're not supposed to be back until Monday night."

"I know guy, but entertaining the pres. got boring so I thought I'd 
stop by and show you something."

As Tommy entered my room, I saw the white plastic bag he was carrying.

"More coloring books I hope?"

"Better guy."

I watched as Tommy started to pull it from the bag.

Dark blue collar, blue material under the collar, and it looks�like a 
zipper there, Scooby print��.all over, it was. A blanket sleeper with 
Scooby print all over!

"FOR ME!?"

"Yeah guy, and one each for the other guys in your cottage."

I got up and walked on the bed to Tommy and hugged him.

"Who donated them?"

"My mom got bored and wanted something to do so I told her you needed 
something to wear at night, Told her you like Scooby Doo, and she said 
to me 'Just like my little Tommy did' and she threw these together in 
nothing flat for you.

"Thank her for me, will you Tommy?"

"Sure, but I got to show you the best thing about them."

Tommy laid them down on my bed and showed me that the legs could be 
opened without having to take the sleeper off out me.

"Now we only have to freeze your butt every time your changed now an 
not all of you Cody."

"Next time you see her, give her this for me."

I hugged Tommy as hard as I could and I kissed him lightly on his 
cheek.

"I'll deliver that A.S.A.P., personally Cody."

"Thanks Tommy."

"Want to try them on for size now?"

No. better take a bath first, but I will, A.S.A.P"

"Let me show you some other things about these, the sleeves are extra 
long, and the right sleeve was made extra wide for your brace and see 
here, you cant even see the snaps on the legs unless you really look 
for them�..

"Tommy?"

"Yeah kid."

"Better get back to your mom, she probably needs you."

"Sherry told you?"

"Yeah, but don't tell her I told you to go back to the hospital, Okay?'

"Okay guy, see you later."

"Bye Tommy, Hope your mom gets better soon."

Tommy walked out of my bedroom. as I admired the new pajamas his mother 
had mad for, just me, and the guys in my cottage.

Should color a picture for Tommy' mom and get Tommy to take it to her I 
thought.

Let's see�. Aw, Here it is, Scooby, Shag, Velma, Freddie, and Daphne. 
Yeah, This picture will do.

I continued coloring very carefully so this would be my best one. 
Always remembering to hold the book down tight on my bed-table with the 
bottom part of my left palm, while I let the fingers that were attached 
to it do their magic on this picture.

The infirmary opened and then closed. Sherry's back with my lunch, 
better put this away so I don't mess it up with my lunch.

"Got some good grub for you Cody, fish sticks, green beans, peas, corn, 
cauliflower, carrots, lima beans, Brussels sprouts, asparagus, beets, 
and squash!"

"Ketchup?"

"Plenty of ketchup."

"Tommy stopped by while you were at lunch, and guess what he brought 
me?"

"Hum�." Sherry said

"Pajamas, Sleeper Pajamas, and look how his mom made them for me, extra 
wide sleeve for my brace, and extra lone sleeves so I can pull my hand 
inside of them when its cold and it has Scooby on them."

"Sherry?"

"Yes Cody."

"Can I take a bath after I eat lunch, Please?"

"I'll see if I can squeeze you in my schedule Cody."

"I wont bother you until dinner if you do."

"Deal!"

I grabbed the first fish stick and before I knew it, it was history. 
The vegetable medley Sherry described was green beans and corn. Three 
pieces of bread rounded out my meal with a follow up of banana pudding. 
With what remained on my plate, you could shale the plate off and it 
would have been good for my dinner.

I laid back against my pillows thinking how good it was going to feel 
wearing my pajamas after I took my bath. The material was so soft to my 
touch, and the right sleeve, so wide just to go over my brace, and 
Tommy's mom made it just for me.

I looked at the brace on my arm and realized that the brace had been 
made just for me too. I stared at it. Was it made with love and heart 
like my new sleeper was? I wonder how long it took to make the brace. I 
remember being measured, thirty long minutes. It took two weeks before 
it was delivered to me. No sharp edges on it anywhere. The holes thru 
the metal bar holding the slings are evenly spaced and none are off 
center. The three rivets securing the cross bar are evenly spaced too. 
Could have gotten by with two rivets, or even one, but yet there were 
three rivets holding it together.

I closed my eyes and laid my head back to rest on my pillows. I had to 
think.

"Cody, wake up���I thought you said you wanted to take a bath after 
lunch?"

What time is it?'

"Almost three, Ready for your bath?"

"Yeah, I guess so."

I take the blankets off of me and slip my legs over the edge of the 
bed. With a little push off with my left hand I slide off the bed and 
my feet hit the floor. Sherry takes my hand and leads me to the 
bathroom like it's the first time I've ever been there before. Sherry 
takes my pj top off of me and lays it aside on the edge of the tub. I 
lift up my foot holding securely on sherry's shoulder as she removes my 
sock. The next leg goes up and soon both feet are resting on the hard 
cold floor. Sherry now works on my pj bottoms and as they re pulled 
down my legs I take one foot out of them at a time. The pants join my 
top now in the pile on the tub. Sherry pulls my plastic pants down and 
I step out of them and they join my pjs. The diaper pins are released 
and Sherry catches my damp diaper before it can touch the floor.

"Sherry?'

"

"Yes Cody." I need to��.

"Okay Cody, Let me know when you're through, I 'll get these thing out 
of here for you."

As sherry leaves the bathroom, I back up to the toilet and plant my 
rear on it holding securely on the seat with my left hand so no 
accidents occur.

I sit there for a few moments before I know I am thru. After I flush 
the toilet, I start the water flowing into the bathtub. Sherry joins me 
again as I watch the water flow. I reach up my hand and she takes it, 
helping me into the tub, and down to my sitting position. As I cross my 
legs in front of me I asked sherry "Did you ever give your brothers a 
bath before?"

"Many times while they were growing up, in fact I gave Ricky a bath a 
few weeks ago, Why?"

"Just wondering."

I felt better now, other boys are still being bathed even though they 
were almost the same age as me. Sherry took the orange sponge and put 
it in the water letting it soak up as much as it could hold before 
squeezing the water out of it over my head. She poured the shampoo in 
her hand and started scrubbing my hair. My eyes were closed as she 
washed my hair. The label said 'No More Tears' on it but I knew that it 
sill hurt a little when it had gotten in my eyes. Sherry dipped the 
sponge in the water over and over again , always squeezing it out over 
my hair, rinsing the shampoo out of my hair. She rubbed the bar of soap 
into the sponge before applying it to my right arm and lathering my arm 
from my wrist up to my shoulder. My back was next and seeing the 
pleasure on my face as she wash it, took her time. I turned facing her 
as I knew that my left arm was next to be washed by the soft sponge. I 
sat facing her with my legs crossed in front of me as she finished my 
arm. My stomach and chest were last to be scrubbed clean before I would 
have to stand up and let her finish her job. As she knelt there, she 
took my hand raising it instructing me with the motion that it was now 
time to stand. I didn't feel embarrassed standing there naked right in 
front of her, She'd seen me many time in bed naked while she had 
changed me and besides she had just given her bother a bath not to long 
ago so I knew she knew how I looked already. She washed my penis and it 
moved a little on its own before it relaxed and retreated back the 
quarter inch and returned to the way it was most of the time. Sherry 
started on the side of my leg always washing it to the front and 
finishing the washing on the opposite side then on to the next and last 
leg. When that was done I knew it was time to turn and let her continue 
with my rear and the backs of my legs. She put the sponge down and 
opened the drain stop to allow the water to flow from the tub to 
wherever it had to go! I faced the showerhead on the wall knowing that 
in a few minutes would be rinsed of and clean. As the water fell, I let 
it hit my head letting it finish the job that sherry had started only a 
few minutes ago. I lifted my hand as sherry turned the water off 
knowing she would take it and help me out of the tub and back onto the 
cold hard floor. Sherry grabbed the towel and wrapped tightly around me 
to keep the cold away from me. When she saw my shivering slow down she 
knew it was time to dry me off and get me dressed and back under my 
covers as soon as possible. Sherry started drying my hair first as she 
chased the water down me with the thirsty towel. When she got down to 
my penis, she dried it off softly and casually as thought see had done 
it my times before. I turned so my back could be dried and as she 
finished a quick hand to my rear told me to head for my bed. I climbed 
up into the nice warm bed, then pulled the blanket over my head hoping 
I would get warmer faster. Sherry grabbed my toes thru the blanket to 
let me know she was ready to get me diapered and dressed for the rest 
of the afternoon. I looked down at the front snap plastic pants I was 
wearing and they were doing their job so far, but I knew that a night 
sleep would let me know if they worked.

"Sherry?"

"What Cody?"

"Tommy's mom made that sleeper special for me."

"I know."

"Before you put it it me , I'll let you in on a little secret."

"What?"

"Look at the legs" I told her.

"I don't see anything."

"That's right, but if you look closer you will."

Sherry studied the legs for a moment before she saw the snaps that were 
so well hidden.

"Neat, Who thought of this?"

"I think it was both Tommy and his mom." I said as I sat there on the 
bed.

Sherry opened up the snaps and put the blanket sleeper over my head 
like a tee shirt. I laid back then I lifted my rear and Sherry pulled 
the sleeper down and under me.

"Makes it quicker and easier to change you now Cody. It will save me a 
few hours changing you each day. Sherry said as I slipped my feet into 
the feet of the blanket sleeper.

Sherry snapped the sleeper up the legs and when she finished, I sat up 
and looked down at the legs and couldn't see any of the snaps.

"You may have the rest of the afternoon off for doing such a fine job 
young lady." I said to her in my best English accent.

"Thank you so very much your lordship." Sherry replied In her best 
English accent.

"Cody?"

"I will!"

Sherry left the room carrying my old pajamas and damp diaper. I sat 
there feeling the soft material that now wrapped my body in warmth. I 
knew the air in my room was cool now but I couldn't feel it at all near 
my legs. I felt the soft material that surrounded my feet and knew my 
feet were going to be warm tonight. The plastic bottoms of my feet 
wrapped up over my toes and ended. I tried the zipper and the pull was 
smooth and the length of the zipper was only to my crotch, not down to 
my left ankle like the red blanket sleeper I had worn earlier that 
week. I could tell the sleeper had growing room by the material that 
bunched up at my ankles. This was not baby pajamas, or little boys 
pajamas, but boys pajamas and I knew I would not have any problems 
wearing them every night at my cottage.

"Cody?"

"I will, I will!"

I reached down and pulled up my right sleeve past the elbow, then 
placed the brace back on my arm. The straps were fastened, then the 
little slings were placed on each finger. I pulled the sleeve back down 
over the brace hiding most of it except the metal bar that stuck out 
and supported the crosspiece and slings. I looked at the partially 
covered brace for a few moments before reaching down and pulling up the 
sleeve to reveal the entire brace. Love must have goon into making my 
brace so I shouldn't hide it.

Better finish this picture for Tommy's mom, knowing Tommy by now, he's 
waiting outside my room right now, waiting for just for the right 
moment to jump in and scare the �.. Out of me.

I sat back against my pillows looking at the picture I'd just finished. 
Not finished yet I thought.

I pushed the button on the side of my bed that let Sherry know I needed 
something.

"Yes your lordship."

Sherry was still playing.

"I needest thou hand for a second my lady."

"What do you need it for?"

"Would you please hold the picture down for me while I finish it. Just 
take a second."

Sherry held the picture down while I added a note: Thank you very much 
Tommy's mom. I will sleep warmer now every night. Love you very much. 
Cody Matthew James

P.S. Get well soon! That's an order!

After I finished, Sherry picked it up and looked it over and read the 
note I added.

"Think she'll like it Sherry?"

"I know she will Cody."

"If Tommy comes by while I'm asleep, make sure he takes the picture and 
gives it to his mom for me, Okay Sherry?"

"Sure I will Cody."

"My lady, will thou go and fetch my din din now, please?" I said to 
Sherry.

"The din din bell no go ding dong yet, but what do you want for 
dinner?"

Before I could stop my mouth, out came that four letter word:

"FOOD"

"Okay Cody, FOOD it is. By the way, I need to take your temp. before 
you eat din din tonight. Do you want me to take your temp. the old way, 
or the new way?"

I sat there for a second thinking before I said: "The new way you'd 
have to undress me and take my temp, then get me dressed again, The old 
way is good enough for me."

Sherry laughed when she saw my left hand go under the covers to protect 
myself from 'the new way'.

I started channel surfing again but everything was ending so I knew 
that it was almost four-thirty or five P.M. Finally a program I could 
watch. A kids sports program telling about some kids and the sports 
they were interested in. An eleven year old boy and how much he liked 
boxing. They told how he started boxing when he was only three years 
old, and now he's ranked almost the best in his class. Other small 
segments came on. A girl who loved riding horses, etc. As the credits 
were rolling for the program, the dinner bell rang. Good, dinner was 
closer then I thought I said to myself. I was really hungry that night, 
must be getting better.

"See you in a little while Cody." Sherry said as she passed by my room.

"Okay." I replied

The remote control in my hand was itching to be used. Don't know what's 
on T.V. now, never watched it at five-thirty. Always been in the 
dinning hall eating dinner at this time.

I surfed before settling on Lucy, black and white of course.

As the program ended with Lucy hugging and kissing Ricky, I heard the 
front door of the infirmary open then slowly close. I knew I would be 
eating soon, maybe? It had to be either Sherry, Tommy, or a kid who 
might have come in looking for Sherry.

"Ready for din sin Cody?" Sherry said as she walked in my room.

I was starving, I didn't care what was under that towel this time. All 
I Knew it was going to all be gone when I was through.

"What's for din din?"

"Chicken fried steak."

I loved Chicken fried steak, but never as much as fried chicken.

I watched as Sherry cut the steak up into more manageable pieces for 
me. If I could cut it with a fork, then I would do it. But when a knife 
and fork were called for I usually let Karen cut it up for me.

"Oop's, almost forgot. Temp. time Cody."

I turned my head as Sherry put the thermometer in my ear. My eyes were 
still glued to the plate that my dinner was laying on.

"Still ninety- nine degrees Cody."

"Can I, Maybe go to school Monday?"

"You know your temp. has to be normal twenty-four hours before I can 
release you from here. If it's normal tomorrow morning, that would be 
cutting it close Cody."

I knew my temp. wasn't going to be normal tomorrow morning, I could 
feel it.

As I ate my dinner I channel surfed. News, dumb program, educational 
T.V., collage football, commercial. I stopped right on that commercial.

'This Halloween, make sure you have plenty of Hershey's candy bars on 
hand'

My mouth froze. Halloween was only three, no, four days away. What was 
I going to wear to the Halloween party at Baldwin elementary school 
Wednesday? Would I even be allowed to go? I had clothes, but none of 
them weird enough to wear as a costume. Maybe I could but a costume, 
No, I don't have any money, or at least enough money. Maybe Tommy could 
loan me some money? Maybe I'll dress up like a Baby? Big baby? No. The 
last thing I want to do is dress like a diaper wearing thumb-sucking 
bottle using baby. Tommy? Tommy would know. Tommy is good at last 
minute ideas! But Tommy not supposed to be back until Monday night! 
Sherry? Maybe she might have an idea!

I reached over and pushed the button for Sherry. It felt like a long 
long time before I heard Sherry's footsteps coming down the hall.

"Sherry!" I almost yelled at her "I don't have a costume to wear to the 
Halloween party at Baldwin elementary school on Wednesday!'

"Calm down Cody, and finish your dinner first, Okay?"

" Is Tommy around?"

"No��.now calm down and finish eating, then we can put our heads 
together and think of something, Okay?"

"Okay" I sighed as she left my room.

My heart wasn't in eating anymore, all I could think of was what to 
wear on Wednesday. I ate the rest of my dinner, but the taste wasn't 
there anymore.

After I finished eating, I laid back and thought. 'Wish Tommy was 
working tonight.'

"Finished yet Cody?" Sherry said as she came into my room.

"Yeah, I guess, but I'm still thinking about my costume."

"Got something here for you Cody" Sherry said as she handed me a little 
white envelope.

"What is it?"

"Open it up and find out."

I opened the envelope and pulled out the card.: Get Well Soon

The picture on the front of the card was a boy in his bed, sick, with a 
thermometer in his mouth. I opened the card and read it to myself. Hope 
you get well soon Cody. Signed Chip, Bradley, What's her name. P.S. 
Done with my homework yet?

As I closed the card I laughed.

"What's so funny Cody?"

I handed Sherry the card and she read it.

"What's her name."

I told Sherry the story:

I had crashed and burned and it was Chip's turn at Gameboy last 
Saturday over at Chip's' house. While he was playing, Chip told me to 
go and ask his mom if it was okay to get some cokes to drink while we 
played the game. I knew she was out on the back patio still cleaning 
the barbeque. When I opened the sliding glass door, she looked over at 
me as I asked" Miss., I mean Mrs.����������."

I couldn't remember her name. I was thinking out loud, as Chip walked 
up behind me and listened. I didn't know Chip was there listening as I 
talked softly to my self 'What's Her Name?"

"I call her mom Cody, but you can call her Mrs. Thompson." Chip said to 
me.

I turned to see Chip standing there with his arms folded across his 
chest, and that little smile on his face. I knew he saw my red face.

I turned back toward her and said "Can me and Chip have a Coke while we 
play Gameboy?"

Mrs. Thompson replied to me: "Chip and I" trying to correct my bad 
English.

I answered her with: "Can we have one too?"

"Sure Cody" Mrs. Thompson said as she laughed.

Sherry laughed at the story too.

"Maybe Chip has something I can wear at the costume party?" I said to 
Sherry.

"I'm still thinking Cody, meanwhile you cover up and stay warm, Okay?"

"Okay" I answered.

I laid back and slowly channel surfed, then����..

"Cody�..Time to wake up."

I covered my eyes trying to shield them from the bright room lights.

"What time is it Sherry?"

"Almost six-twenty A.M."

"Why so early?"

"Want to get you back to school tomorrow I hope."

I now knew what she was there for. I turned my head and she put the 
temp. probe in my ear. I listened for the beep and then I hoped.

"Sorry Cody, ninety- nine. No school for you tomorrow.

"Sherry?"

"What Cody?"

"When you bring my breakfast back, can you take my temp. with another 
thermometer, maybe that ones reading bad."

"Sure Cody, I will. Want the light on or off?"

"On please."

I continued looking out the window from my bed as I laid there. Wonder 
if anything's changed over at my cottage? I wonder what Tommy's doing 
right now? SLEEPING I said to myself. Its only about six-twenty-five in 
the morning.

The breakfast bell rang. I waited to hear the guys from cottage-A as 
they walked to the dinning hall. I could make out Mohammed's voice as 
he was talking about the trip Mark Allen had scheduled that day.

I wonder where they're taking them on the trip today?

I turned on the T.V. and channel surfed. News, News, News, talking 
about president Bush, What a name for a president? Bush? Jefferson, 
Washington, and even Regan, those were presidents names. But Bush? I 
can see it now. Bush was in the oval office today, surrounded by the 
other little Bushes when a gardener broke in with his hedge trimmer 
running and cut Bush down to size. I started laughing seeing all the 
leaves flying all around the oval office.

Well onward. Aw�..Just what I was looking for, Big Bird.

I watched Big Bird as he talked about the different types of dance 
there were.

Mexican fiesta dance, those kids were good I thought. Clog dancing, 
that I could not stand. All the kids were in step but I don't like it. 
Maybe it's the sound, but I still didn't like it. Boys ballet was nest. 
I watched closer as the boys moved so smoothly across the stage. I 
could do that easy I thought. All I need is some tights, a leotard, and 
a hell of a lot of room to stop. I always made the same moves when I 
walked up to the dinning hall every morning, half awake. Nice and 
smooth, until I walk in thru the door, trip on the edge of the 
threshold, stumble about five feet and go down on the floor rolling 
into the chair and table. Maybe they would let me stop my dancing 
offstage so no one saw it, ending up in a pile., then I'd be good. Naw. 
Too much practice. Not for me.

Western dancing, they were really good there.

I was watching the program ending when I saw that my brace was not up 
on the bed-table like it usually is. I looked quickly at my right arm, 
and there it was. Still strapped on tightly from the night before.

I slept all night with it on and didn't even notice it. Maybe I'm 
getting used to it again I thought to myself.

"Got your two favorites for breakfast Cody."

"Sherry�..I didn't hear the door close when you came in."

"Came in the back door. Needed to stop at my car on the way back with 
your breakfast."

"What's my two favorites?"

"Fruit Loops and?"

"Apple Jacks" I answered her.

"Nope Cody."

I looked at Sherry confused.

"Cinnamon and sugar" she hinted to me.

"Cream of wheat?"

"Only one guess and he gets it right!"

"Sherry?"

"Yes Cody."

"Tell you the truth, I didn't like cream of wheat���.until you made it 
your special way for me."

"You mean" Sherry said as she took the cinnamon and sugar packets out 
of her pocket.

"Yeah, That's why you stopped by your car?"

"No, had to pick up something else." Sherry said as she prepared my 
breakfast.

Sherry sat down as she mixed the cream of wheat, cinnamon and sugar 
together. She dipped the spoon in and said, "Open your mouth Cody."

"Every time I have cream of wheat now, your going to feed it to me?" I 
asked her.

"If you want me to."

"What will Tommy say about you feeding me Sherry?"

"I'll tell Tommy he has to wait his turn like a good little boy."

Sherry continued feeding me, but I really wasn't embarrassed by it 
because I think we had a special bond between us, and she made me feel 
so much better even though I have been in the infirmary for seven days 
now. We talked between spoonfuls about everything, like what movies I 
saw and liked. Programs on T.V. that I rarely saw now since I'm living 
with boys almost half of them half my age. I found out that she liked 
to hike too, and told her about Tommy's idea about starting a hiking 
club here at Mark Allen. After the last spoonful was delivered I asked 
Sherry: "Did you forget my temp.?"

"No Cody, just need to get rid of your breakfast tray, and get some 
more supplies for you. Be right back in a second."

Sherry left my room carrying the tray.

I moved the bed-table out of the way and unsnapped the legs of my new 
warm blanket sleeper so I would be ready for Sherry to change my wet 
diaper.

"Temp. time Cody." Sherry said as she entered my room with a new stack 
of diapers in her arms.

"See your waiting for me Too Cody." She added.

I turned my head and she took my temp. When she was done, I could tell 
by her face that my temp. hadn't gone down.

"Sorry Cody, but it reads ninety-nine point four."

My temp. had gone up instead of down.

"I know what Cody, How about you and me playing a board game later?"

"Okay" I told her half heartedly.

Sherry put the towel under me and unsnapped my plastic pants as I lay 
there. She unfastened my diaper and slipped the diaper and plastic 
pants out from under me. She spread out a new diaper and put a 
trifolded diaper in the middle of it and slipped it under me. As she 
was fastening the diaper together she said: "Cody, remember telling me 
you wanted some printed plastic pants, well I got them for you."

I looked up at her horrified "I was just joking Sherry��..you really 
didn't buy them did you?"

"Sure I did Cody, and I know you will like them."

Sherry reached in between the cloth diapers and took out the three snap 
front plastic pants. When I saw the printed plastic pants, I smiled at 
her.

"Do you mined wearing them now Cody?"

"No, I like them."

As Sherry slipped them under me and pulled the front of them up between 
my legs and snapped them closed I asked Sherry "Who told you?"

"Tommy."

I looked down at my new plastic pants. Nascar plastic pants with Dale 
Jerrode's car on the front and smaller Nascar racing cars on the sides 
and rear of the plastic pants.

"When did Tommy tell you I wanted to be a race car driver some day?"

"Last Monday before I left."

" Where did you find them?"

"At a hospital supply store over where I live."

X+

I remember the first time I wore printed plastic pants when I was ten 
years old.

I woke up in the hospital in a room with another kid who was really 
sick. I had machines hooked up to me and a I.V. going in my leg. The 
nurse came in and I asked her what happened and where was I. She told 
me that a truck had run me over and I was in the pediatric intensive 
care unit. My stomach felt like a big bowl of Jell-o every time I 
moved. My back was hurting real bad and the nurse gave me a shot for 
the pain. My legs felt weird and I asked why. She told me that I was 
wearing a diaper and I had to wear it for a little while, while I was 
there.

I was laying in a hospital crib bed like the one I was put in after the 
second operation on my right arm when I was eight years old. That time 
the nurses had told me to stay in bed and not to get out. But I was 
always getting out of my bed and running up and down the hallways. They 
put me in the hospital crib bed so I couldn't climb out of my bed 
anymore.

When I asked why I was in the hospital crib this time, it was the same 
answer, They wanted me to stay in bed until I got better and they 
didn't want me to move around too much. The nurse changed my diaper 
twice that day, always putting on a clean pair of plastic pants snap 
front style on me when she changed my diapers. The next day they moved 
me to a ward with other boys and girls in it. I thought I was going to 
be the only one in there in a crib and wearing a diaper. When I got to 
the room, all the other kids were wearing a diaper like me and there 
were three other crib beds in the room. There was a boy in the room 
with me named Robby, and he was fourteen years old. He was wearing a 
diaper and printed plastic pants like me. I asked him why he was there 
and he told me he had a bad bladder infection, and that's why he had to 
wear a diaper. He couldn't control his bladder anymore and had to wear 
a diaper all the time now.

When I got out of the hospital the doctor told me I might get better 
soon, but I didn't think he was telling me the truth. I told him I 
didn't want to wear a diaper anymore, so he put a catheter in my penis 
to catch my pee and drain it into a bag. The catheter hurt really bad 
when it was put in and taken out for cleaning. I had two infections 
using it and I hated it. The doctor tried a penis sleeve on me but 
every time I played hard or jumped my penis came out and my pants would 
become wet. Besides, I hated wearing the collection bag taped to my 
leg. I told my mom and the doctor that I wanted to wear a diaper now 
instead of the penis sleeve. The diaper was softer and felt better on 
me It doesn't hurt when it is put on me unless I got stuck with the 
diaper pin. The last time I saw Doctor Williams, I was twelve years 
old. I asked him if I would ever stop wetting myself and he told me 
that he didn't think so. I started crying as I sat in Mrs. Martinez's 
lap. (Mr. And Mrs. Martinez were my third and last foster parents 
before I moved to Mark Allen Boy's Home.)

When we got back home that day, Mrs. Martinez changed my diaper. While 
she was rubbing baby lotion on my penis, it started getting bigger and 
harder. I was embarrassed, but Mrs. Martinez didn't say anything. When 
I had my diaper and plastic pants on she told me to go and play in the 
back yard and not to get dirty. I used to play in the backyard all the 
time wearing only a diaper and tee shirt. No one could see me in the 
back yard, so I didn't care what I was wearing and Mrs. Martinez didn't 
have to wash an extra pair of pants because I got them dirty. When Mrs. 
Martinez told me to come in and take a bath, she stopped me at the back 
door and took my diaper, and tee shirt off of me, and told me to go get 
in the tub and she would be in a minute to give me a bath. I told her I 
could give myself a bath this time and she said, "Okay"

I ran to the bathroom and turned the water on. When it was the right 
temp. I climbed in the tub and turned on the hand shower. I played with 
the different spray setting as I sat there. I reached over and shut the 
drain off and grabbed the hand shower again and aimed it down on my 
head and shoulders. The fine spray felt the best as I moved the spray 
back and fourth across my chest, it tingled and felt good hitting me. I 
looked at my penis and thought, it would be great to step in the tub, 
rinse the pee off of me, soap up and rinse the soap off of me. Then I 
would only have to dry myself off from the waist down. Easy I thought. 
I aimed the spray down on my penis and watched my penis grow, off, my 
penis went back to its normal size. I tried the experiment a few more 
times and always went back to its original size. I would wake up in the 
morning every now and then and my penis was big and hard. After I was 
awake for a few minutes, my penis would go back to its original size. 
When I was being changed every now and then, my penis would grow a 
little, but I always managed to stop it one way or another. Having baby 
oil, nursery jelly or baby lotion rubbed on my front and penis was 
causing my penis to grow a little but I always caught it in time before 
I could be embarrassed to much by it. I aimed the spray from the hand 
shower at my penis again and watched it grow. I wonder how big it would 
get? The hand shower fell from my grip. My penis was moving up and down 
with quick jerks that felt�felt so good. I reach my hand down to stop 
my penis from jerking, but when my hand got down to it, it didn't stop 
it, it was helping my penis go up and down in its grip. I bent forward 
as that fabulous sensation continued. I wanted it to stop. My hand and 
the penis in its grip were one, the same motion at the exact time. No, 
I didn't want it ever to stop. Am I hurt? Will I have to go to the 
hospital? Was I injured? Injuries hurt! This feels so, so, so, good. 
I'm breathing hard. My penis is slowing down. I tingle all over. What 
happened? Am I hurt and don't know it? My hand slows down and each 
moment up and down is slowing down. My eyes are closed. I don't want to 
look in case there's blood, and I was injured. My penis has almost 
stopped. With no more movement from my penis, I open my eyes and look. 
No blood, but I'm scared. Nothing like this has ever happened to me. 
What was it?

"Time to get out of the tub Cody." Mrs. Martinez yells at me, "Dinners 
almost on the table."

I quickly get out of the tub checking to make sure I'm not bleeding 
anywhere. I never felt anything like this except when I fell into the 
window and cut a artery under my right arm. The feeling of blood 
rushing from my arm felt weird, but not this type of weird. I turned 
the water off, then dried myself off as quickly as I could, dropped the 
towel to the floor and ran as fast as I could to my bedroom. Got to get 
to the kitchen as fast as I can I thought. I opened my dresser drawer 
looking for something, anything to wear to the table. I'll put my racer 
swimsuit on so I can get to the kitchen. With my racer on, I start for 
the open bedroom door, then remembering my wetting problem I go back to 
the dresser and take out a diaper from the top drawer and stuff it in 
the front of my racer over my penis knowing this will catch the pee I 
might leak while I sit eating dinner. When the diaper in place, my 
penis starts getting bigger again. I stand there for a few moments 
hoping that it stops growing. My penis stops and starts returning back 
to its normal size again. As I walk to the kitchen, I feel the cloth 
diaper tickling my penis, but it stays the normal size. I am scared.

Monday rolls around, and I go to school like normal. Almost three weeks 
left in the school year at Emerson Elementary. I still like talking to 
Sandy and we wonder what teacher we will have next year in the sixth 
grade. Thursday, I'm sitting on one of the lunch tables watching a 
kickball game. Two sixth grade boys come out from the hallway arguing 
with each other. One boy says to the other boy 'Go play with yourself' 
then takes his hand and puts it down to the front of his jeans over his 
penis and makes the same back and forth motion I did to my penis in the 
tub last Friday. I hear the word masturbation and look it up in the 
dictionary in the library. Masturbation: Males To stimulate ones sex 
organ (penis) until sperm is ejected.

That's what happened to me last Friday. I'm not going to die. It's 
natural when you start puberty. I was no longer scared, but why don't 
they teach this in the forth grade. If I had a father, would he explain 
to me what had happened to me last Friday night? All I did was 
accidentally play with myself!

X-

Sherry was snapping the legs of my blanket sleeper closed when I said 
jokingly to her: "If you burp me and give me my bottle, I'll wove you!"

When she was finished changing me see gave me that look as she left my 
room.

"Sherry?"

"Sherry�..I was just joking!"

"Sherry�..did you hear me?�.. I was only joking!"

My temp. was still ninety-nine point four. That means I wont be going 
to school until Tuesday, maybe. Well at least I got out of church 
today. N.F.L. football will be on soon. Wonder who's playing on the 
local channels? I started coloring, and kept hoping Tommy would show up 
any minute. I wish I was out of here.

"Cody, here's your Bottle."

I looked at the door as Sherry tossed the bottle on my bed. I looked at 
it expecting the worst when I saw the label: Snapple Grape.

"Thanks Sherry"

"I'll play a game with you in about hour and a half, okay Cody?"

"Okay" I replied as I took the cap off the bottle.

Finally, something to drink other then orange juice and water.

I tried watching a game of football, but my mind was on Halloween, 
Tommy, and Chip. Wonder want Chip is doing today? Probably swimming 
with Bradley, or if Bradley had talked his mom into a pup, they are 
probably playing with it.

I kept my eye on my room door expecting Tommy to walk in any second 
with a great Halloween costume in his hand. I knew Sherry was still 
thinking about my costume, she never forgot anything. I looked at the 
coloring book and thumbed thru it. Almost fourteen pictures done. Looks 
like I have about twice that number left to do. I went back to the 
picture I had colored for Tommy's mom and looked it over to make sure 
it was totally finished. Better fold it and tear it out of the book in 
case Tommy's in a hurry I can hand it to him. I folded the picture a 
few times against the spine of the book to make sure it tore in a 
straight line. When it was loose from the coloring book, I did one last 
look to be sure everything was done before I tri folded it like a 
letter. I took out the brown crayon and wrote: To Tommy's Mom.

I wonder where Momammod was going today? When the schedule came out for 
the two weeks activities I would always check it and see if there were 
any good trips listed. But that Saturday morning I was thinking about 
going over to chip's house so I didn't check it. Mom (Karen) would 
always cross off the trips that she knew we could not go on since they 
would not have enough supervision or they got back to late for us guys 
in cottage-A Friday nights were always crossed off. All movie trips 
that left at six P.M. and got back to Mark Allen after nine. But what 
trip was planed for today after church? Trip to the park? No. Zoo. Naw, 
went there a few weeks ago. Hiking? No, Tommy's not around, unless. No. 
Swim At the Y.M.C.A. No, Maybe. I knew Mohammod loved to swim, but, how 
do you make a day of it? Maybe there's a caravel around somewhere I 
didn't hear about. I'll ask Sherry when she comes back in.

Hey, I got it. I know what I can wear as a costume on Wednesday. I can 
borrow Tommy's White shirt he sometimes wears here at the infirmary, a 
stethoscope, rubber clove, and a thermometer in my pocket. I go as a 
mad Doctor. A little ketchup as blood. I can borrow a rusty saw from 
George the groundskeeper as a scalpel. Not as good as I want, but 
better then nothing.

I looked thru the coloring book looking for any goofs on any pictures 
that might have been made while they were printing it. Couldn't find 
any.

"Cody, ready?" Sherry said as she walked into my room.

"Yeah, What Game are we playing?"

"Parcheesi"

"Good, Easy game to play and cheat on."

"You'd never cheat on me would you Cody?"

"Naw, then you wouldn't want to play anymore."

"Sherry, Do you think Tommy would loan me one of his shirts that he 
wears around here when he's on duty?"

"What do you want it for Cody?"

"Might make a costume with it."

"Those shirts are expensive Cody."

"It's the only thing I can think of for a costume."

"Well, You can talk to him tomorrow night when he starts his shift 
Cody."

Sherry and I played Parcheesi until the lunch bell rang. I was almost 
winning, but Sherry had three games under her belt, and I had one game, 
and almost this one last game too.

"I'm taking off for lunch. See you in a little bit."

"Sherry. What was the trip today, I mean where were they going today?"

"Griffith park observatory"

"Aw�..Man."

"Wanted to go huh, Cody?"

"Yeah."

"Be back in a while."

I heard the infirmary door slowly close behind Sherry as she went to 
the dining hall for lunch.

I wish there was some car racing on T.V. now. Bradley should be getting 
ready for his nap pretty soon. I wish they had a V.C.R. here in the 
infirmary. Wonder if Tommy will let me borrow one of his shirts for my 
costume. Mohammad must be having a good time at the observatory.

I couldn't keep my mind on anything right now. I was so bored laying on 
this bed starting my eight day here at the infirmary.

I went for the remote control for the T.V.

Football, Boring. Cooking, Boring. Boxing, Boring. Basketball, Boring. 
Old Movie, Boring. Jetsons, Okay.

I watched the last half of the Jetsons, and then The Flintstones came 
on next. I was watching the Flintstones when she walked into my life.

"Lunch is served Cody."

"What is it?"

Macaroni beef and cheese, corn, bread and butter, and salad and if your 
really good, I have a surprise for you."

"My baby bottle to help me wash it all down?"

Sherry was pointing her finger over towards the door as I finished 
speaking. When I looked over there, I could see a shadow near the door.

"Tommy, is that you?"

"No Cody, it ain't."

That squeaky voice, I knew it anywhere. "Chip?"

Chip walked into the room, "Yeah"

"What the�.heck are you doing here?"

"I'll see you in a while Cody." Sherry said as she left the room.

"Got my homework done yet Cody?" Chip asked.

"Let me look thru my coloring book and see what you can hand in for art 
class."

I had so many questions I wanted to ask Chip but I didn't know where to 
start, but I knew I was going to have to answer his question first as I 
saw his eyes glance at my hand and arm brace.

"I was thinking I would use this as part of my Halloween costume this 
Wednesday." I told Chip as I lifted my right arm up.

"What is it?" Chip asked me.

I told Chip the story about the brace and why I now had to wear it all 
the time I'm awake.

"How's Bradley and your mom?"

"There fine, and no, Bradley didn't get his puppy. Mom thought he was 
to young to have a dog right now, but Bradley did settle for a big 
Teddy bear though. What's this here?" Chip asked as he felt the sleeve 
covering my brace.

My face turned red when I realized he was referring to my blanket 
sleeper I was wearing.

"Chip, you know when I wear my sweater at school, usually around my 
waist. Well its because I get so cold of a sudden, I can take it off my 
waist and put it on when I need it."

"So you don't wear it in case you start�"

"Leaking" I finished Chip's question. "Sometimes, but I just need it 
near me in case I get cold."

"What's this about your baby bottle?" Chip asked.

I started laughing. I explained to Chip how Tommy got me to eat the 
first couple of times because I was really sick. Tommy knew I would 
just look at the food and go to sleep. Then how Tommy carried me to the 
bathtub because I wasn't walking to good, and how Tommy gave me a bath 
because I reeked. I told Chip all that was left was to burp me and give 
me my bottle and I would be One Happy Baby.

Chip was laughing when Sherry walked in.

Chip was looking her over when I said: "And Sherry promised to marry me 
as soon as I GREW UP"

Sherry looked at me and said: "And don't you forget that, Cody!"

Chip and me started laughing at the expression on Sherry's face.

"Time for your medicine and temp." Sherry reminded me.

I took the little cup and with two quick gulps the medicine was gone. 
After Sherry took my temp. she told me it was down to ninety-nine point 
two. Sherry then told me to eat my lunch as she left the room.

Chip walked over to the window to get the chair to sit on and I knew he 
was wearing a diaper.

"Chip, Are you wearing a diaper?" I asked him quietly

Chip looked down at his zipper then looked at me and asked me: "How did 
you know?"

"I could hear it when you walked over to get the chair" I told him.

"Why are you wearing a diaper now Chip?"

Chip told me that when he goes anywhere now that he doesn't know that 
well he sometimes gets scared and may have a little accident. Every 
store or restaurant he goes into , he always makes sure where the 
bathrooms are first before he goes shopping or eats his meal.

The last three years he's lived in the neighborhood he's only been down 
the street Mark Allen was on, once. When he got to the gate that day 
and saw what was here, he ran all the way home, scared. By the time he 
got in his house, his pants were soaking wet.

When I asked him how he got onto Mark Allen grounds, he said that 
Sherry invited him to come over and visit me in the infirmary on Sunday 
at noon.

Chip had called Mark Allen Boys Home last Friday and asked Miss. 
Oseeda, how I was doing, and if I was going to be coming back to 
Baldwin elementary school anymore. Miss. Oseeda told him she could not 
release any information on any of the boys here at Mark Allen.

Chip had an idea on Saturday, and when he called again, John answered 
the phone. Chip told John that he had the homework assignment due on 
Monday from Mr. Markson's class and he needed to give it to me. John 
switched the call to the infirmary and Sherry answered it. When Chip 
told her who he was, she invited him down for a visit on Sunday when 
Marcus was at the gate. She knew Marcus would let Chip on the grounds 
to see me.

"Chip, how did you like the slop they feed us here at mark Allen?"

"It was okay but I wouldn't want to eat it every day."

"By the way, Which door did you go in to the dining hall?"

"What do you mean Cody?"

"Did you go in the door nearest the street, or the door off the little 
patio, you know, the door facing this place?"

"Oh, the door on this side of the dining hall, Why?"

"Did you see the tables to the left of the door as you entered the 
dinning hall?"

"Yeah ,Why?"

"How many boys did you see at the four tables sitting there?"

"Two tables were empty but�I saw about seven boys and one lady sitting 
at the two tables next to the empty tables."

"Do you know who that lady was Chip?"

"No."

"That lady was Karen, my house mother."

"You mean you sleep with those little boys?"

"No, Wouldn't be enough room in the twin size bed, but, I live in the 
same cottage as they do"

"Why didn't they put you in with boys your own age?"

"Guess they wanted me around a little bit longer. If they put me in 
with boys my own age, I would have probably been killed by one of the 
guys in a week."

"Chip, Did you see the next four tables behind the tables that Karen 
was sitting at?"

"You mean the last four tables next to all those sliding glass doors?"

"Yeah" Chip answered.

"That's were cottage-B sits for their meals, That's the cottage that's 
next to mine over there" I said to Chip as I pointed out of the window 
of my room.

"Some of those guys were tall" Chip remarked to me.

That's the next cottage up from cottage-A. The boys in that cottage-B 
are nine and ten years old, and I think there are two boys in there who 
are eleven years old."

"Cody, If they put you in that cottage�B, you would have been dead in a 
day!"

"That's why my social worker and Mr. Gee put me in cottage-A, I guess, 
so I would have less fights, and get along easier with the guys in 
cottage-A."

"How old are the guys in your cottage Cody?"

"Six, seven, and there are three eight year olds too."

"Don't you hate it, you know, being in a cottage with boys a lot 
younger then you?"

"Yeah, Especially when you have to go to bed at eight P.M. every night 
even on weekends and during summer too."

"That sucks.' Chip remarked.

"It's not too bad, I think the only one who can beat me up is probably 
Mohammad, and we get along pretty good together."

"Who changes you in cottage-A when you need it Cody?"

"Karen, and I'm not the only one who wears a diaper at night, five 
other boys wear them at night because they still wet the bed."

"Don't they tease you about having to wear a diaper all the time?"

"Use to, but not any more. I guess they know I'll hit them if they do."

"Hold on Chip while I ring for Sherry."

I pressed the button to tell Sherry that I needed her.

"Do you think they will let you come over to my house for a sleepover 
one of these weekends Cody?"

""I don't think so, I can't even go home for an overnighter yet while 
I'm still in cottage-A."

"That sucks��.. Why won't they let you Cody?" Chip asked me.

"I guess they think I won't come back to Mark Allen when I'm supposed 
to. Maybe they think I might run away like I did in the second foster 
home I was in."

"You can still ask them."

"I'll think about it." I told Chip.

"You need something, my lord?" Sherry asked as she came into my room.

"You know that Snapple you gave me this morning?"

"Yes Cody."

"Well I think I'm through with it now."

Sherry and Chip had a puzzled look on their faces.

I pointed down to my crotch and Sherry understood I needed a change.

Sherry looked at me then at Chip quickly then back at me.

"Sherry, Chip knows, In fact he helped me get changed when I was over 
at his house last Saturday when his mom was busy in the back yard. He's 
the one who switched one of Bradley's diapers for mine, and didn't tell 
me about it for a while. Chip knows how to change a�diaper because 
he�."

I looked at Chip and his eyes were warning me not to tell Sherry about 
him wearing a diaper too.

I continued "changes his little brother's diaper all the time."

I looked back at Chip, and he had that little smile on his face.

I pushed the blanket and sheet off of me as I pulled my feet out from 
under the covers. Chip now saw the blanket sleeper I was wearing and 
did not say anything until Sherry started unsnapping my crotch and 
legs.

"Why not just take the sleeper off and get changed Cody?"

"We tried that and it takes a little longer, and besides, I start 
getting cold real fast while I'm being changed." I told Chip.

"Where did you get the Scooby blanket sleeper Cody?"

"Tommy's mom made it for me when Tommy told her I needed some warm 
pajamas to wear this winter. I wish Tommy was here right now. I now you 
would like him Chip."

I pulled my feet out of the blanket sleeper, then Sherry tossed the 
legs of the sleeper up beside me.

I saw the expression on Chip's face when he saw the Nascar snap front 
plastic pants I was wearing, and I had totally forgotten I was wearing 
them.

"You like Nascar too, Cody?"

"Yeah" I said feeling totally embarrassed about the printed plastic 
pants.

Chip then continued:

"My dad drove a Nascar for three races before he had an bad accident 
and had to quit driving. He was a fill in driver in Georgia where he 
met my mom at the racetrack. She was still in college working on her 
degree, and needed the money for collage. She was working the 
concession stand when he proposed to her. When she accepted, they 
kissed a long time while the people waiting in line to be served 
applauded and then cheered when she accepted.

I thought I knew everything about Chip until he told me that. I knew 
that he liked most of the sports like baseball, and basketball. Chip 
use to go deep-sea fishing with his father, and go hiking too. Chip's 
dad had also taught him how to swim by the time Chip was six years old. 
The more Chip talked about his father, the more it sounded just like he 
was talking about Tommy.

As Sherry spread out one diaper and placed another tri folded diaper in 
the middle Chip said: "That's double diapering. I tell Bradley that 
when he gets two diapers put on him at one time. We dress him that way 
when my mom is taking him out shopping or on a trip somewhere.

Sherry placed my plastic pants under me, pulled the front up between my 
legs then snapped them closed. I put my feet back into the sleeper, 
then Sherry snapped the legs of the blanket sleeper closed. I sat up 
and pulled the covers back over my legs as Sherry put the wipes and 
baby powder away.

"Cody, I want you to eat your lunch soon or I'm going to feed it to you 
for dinner." said Sherry.

Sherry picked up my wet diaper and started to leave my room saying: 
"Almost time for your visit to end Chip.

"Sherry?"

"Yes Cody."

"Think Mr. Gee would let me spend the night over at Chip's house one of 
these weekends?"

"You would have to talk to him about that Cody." Sherry said as she 
left the room.

"Chip, need a change yet?"

"No still dry."

"Chip, Do you like wearing diapers?"

"Sometimes. They're a lot softer then my underwear and more comfortable 
too."

"What does it feel like to wear underwear Chip?"

Chip stood there trying to figure out a way to describe how they felt 
when he wore them.

"Have you ever worn a Speedo when you went swimming Cody?"

"You mean Racer?"

"Yeah, same thing."

"Yes, but I didn't wear it swimming, I was late for dinner one time at 
my last foster home. I was taking a bath an Mrs. Martinez told me to 
get dressed for dinner. The only thing I could find quickly and put on 
by myself was my racer swimsuit. I stuffed a diaper in front of it just 
in case I wet a little at the dinner table."

"That's how underwear feel to me I guess." Then Chip added:

"Cody, I thought you only wore disposable diapers all the time, not 
cloth diapers."

"I only wear the disposables to school, and when I'm changed at school, 
otherwise I wear cloth diapers the rest of the time. Cloth diapers are 
cheep, disposable diapers are expensive, that's what mom, I mean Karen 
is all ways telling me.' I told Chip.

"Chip?'

"What?"

"Sorry I was mad at you last Saturday when you asked me if I needed a 
change after you changed Bradley's diaper." I was scared when I knew 
that you knew I was wearing a diaper. I thought you were just going to 
start teasing me like they did at my last school, and start calling me 
a baby.

"You should have seen your face Cody when I asked you. I have seen that 
look on Bradley's face once when he knew he was going to get a spanking 
by my mom."

"I didn't know your mom spanked Bradley or you." I said to Chip.

"It's not really a spanking Cody, it's more or less called a pop, pop. 
Mom takes her hand and taps Bradley's rear while she says POP, POP, and 
the way Bradley screams and cries, you would think my mom is killing 
him. That's the way you looked last Saturday in Bradley's nursery 
room."

"I was scared, mad, and upset all at once I guess." I said to Chip.

"Well, see if you can spend the night one of these weekends Cody. I'm 
sure my mom won't mind"

"My mom would have been here today, but since I have the flu they 
wouldn't let her come." I told him.

"so, your mom can come and see you here."

"Yeah, the last Sunday of every month as long as I don't have any hours 
to work off."

Chip walked over to the window facing my cottage then said: "That's 
where you sleep right over there?"

"Yeah."

"And those guys playing near the jungle gym are the guys in your 
cottage?"

"Yeah, See the kid near the left side, playing in the sand?"

"Yes."

"That's David. That's the only place he likes to play. Only that one 
little corner."

I knew if there was a kid there that it had to be David, even though I 
could not see him, I knew it was him.

"Is he smoothing out the sand with his hand?"

"Yeah< why?"

"He likes to make his roads nice and smooth."

Chip stood there watching David playing in the sand.

"Going to school tomorrow Cody?"

"No, Don't think so. Sherry says my temp. has to be normal twenty-four 
hours before they will let me go back to my cottage.



"Pools still warm, and my mom says as long as it doesn't get down to 
freezing, she'll keep it heated thru the winter, so next time you come 
over we can go swimming."

Chip, I really don't know how to swim."

Chip turned and looked at me in disbelief. I looked down at the brace 
on my arm, and then Chip understood the reason.

"Well, we have to teach you then Cody."

"I'm great at drowning thought, toss me in the water and I sink faster 
then a rock."

Chip was laughing

"Cody, just bring your 'racer' the next time and you can use some of 
Bradley's water wings."

When Chip said racer, my penis started to get bigger. I could feel it 
pushing on my clean dry diaper.

"What are water wings?" I asked Chip.

"They are little plastic arm bands you slip up on your arm, and they 
are filled with air so they .Keep you above the water. If that doesn't 
work, then maybe one of Bradley's float suits might be large enough for 
you to wear.

Chip saw the puzzled look on my face.

"The float suit is a swimsuit you wear, Kind of like a girls one piece 
swim suit but it has Styrofoam in the chest and back that keeps you 
floating.

Bradley likes to wear his all the time now when he's in the pool."

"Kind of like a life preserver?"

"Yeah, but you step into it and then zip up the back, and no matter how 
hard you try to swim down to the bottom of the pool it will bring you 
right back up."

"Chip, Time for you to leave. Two o'clock." Sherry said as she walked 
into the room.

"Guess I'll see you on Tuesday Cody."

"With luck>"

"See you later Cody." Chip said as he left my room with Sherry.

"I hope on Tuesday." I yelled at him.

I lay back against the pillows. I was glad Chip had come by, but now I 
was missing him and the little break in the boredom he brought.

I saw the card Chip had sent me on my bed-table parochially hidden by 
my lunch tray. I pulled the towel off the tray, then the cover off the 
plate. The food was cold now but I ate it any way. As I ate my lunch, I 
would look at the T.V. occasionally to see it anything interesting was 
on. When my lunch was finished, I slid down under the covers to think. 
I was tired again, being up since six-thirty and the boredom of being 
in bed all the time was making me sleepy.

I woke when I heard the door to the infirmary close. When I looked over 
at the window, it was getting dark outside.

"Anyone place an order to go?"

"Tommy?"

"How did you know Cody?"

"I know your voice anywhere." I told him.

"I have to disguise my voice next time I guess." Tommy said in a high 
girlish voice.

"What are you doing here, Your not supposed to be here until tomorrow 
night I thought."

"I wanted to stop by and make sure Sherry hadn't gotten rid of your 
body yet."

"What's that in your hands?"

"I dunno, Roy wanted me to bring it over here and see if I could get 
some kid to eat it. Want to try it Cody?" Tommy said with a sinister 
look on his face.

"After you Tommy., by the way, what is it?"

"Chow mein."

"Tommy, I will eat it and sacrifice my life so others may eat it."

"That's such noble thing you'll be doing Cody." Tommy said as he placed 
the tray down on my bed-table.

"What are you really doing here Tommy?"

"Sherry needed some time off to study for a big test at her collage on 
Tuesday. She let me take my mother to the hospital yesterday, so I 
thought I would cover the rest of her shift today and tomorrow.

"Oh, Tommy, Would you give this to your mom the next time you see her?"

"What is it Cody?"

"Just a thank you note."

"Mined if I proof read it Cody?"

"I didn't know you could read Tommy. Do you know your numbers too?"

Tommy hit me on my head lightly with my thank you note.

"Think she'll like it Tommy?"

"I know she will Cody, and I'll make sure she gets it A.S.A.P." Tommy 
said after he finished reading it.

"Hay Tommy, think I can borrow one of the shirts you wear around here, 
and use it for a Halloween costume?"

"Don't you have a costume yet Cody?"

"No, Sherry and me have been trying to think of a Halloween costume I 
can wear on Wednesday for the costume party at Baldwin elementary."

"I'll have to think about that Cody, better eat your dinner before it 
crawls off the plate and into bed with you."

"By the way Cody, How do you like you pajamas?"

"I like them Tommy, now my feet and arms stay warm with the rest of me. 
Think I could talk you mom into making me a few more of them in case I 
out grow these?"

"Maybe Cody, if you keep sending thank you notes like this to my mom."

"Tommy, I need to use the toilet tonight when I get changed."

"Okay Cody, now EAT!"

The chow mein tasted so good, I ate all of it even though I wasn't that 
hungry after my late lunch.

I was thinking about Chip and how he told Sherry and me about his 
father. I knew if he met Tommy, he'd like Tommy too, but not as much as 
I did. Maybe the next time I go to Chip's house, maybe Tommy can come 
in with me and meet Chip. To bad Tommy wasn't here at lunch time then 
he could have met Chip, then again if Tommy was here, he might not have 
let Chip visit me at lunch time.

I needed to use the bathroom now, so I pushed the button for Tommy.

Tommy came by the room five minutes later.

"Done with dinner Guy?"

"Yeah, need to use the bathroom A.S.A.P."

"Okay guy."

I got to thinking, Tommy can undo the snaps on the legs of my blanket 
sleeper, take my diaper off of me and when I went to sit on the toilet, 
I would have to hold my sleeper out of the way while I went, but I also 
needed my left arm to hold on the seat so I wouldn't fall in the 
toilet.

"Tommy, better take my sleeper off of me so I don't get it dirty."

I swung my legs over the side of the bed and slid down the side of the 
bed while I held onto the safety bed rail for balance. It felt weird 
standing on my feet after being in bed for more then twenty-four hours. 
I took my brace off my am and laid it on the bed while Tommy pulled the 
zipper down on my sleeper. Tommy took the sleeper off my shoulders and 
pulled it down to the floor. I held onto Tommy's shoulder as I took my 
feet out of the sleeper.

"I see Sherry bought the Nascar plastic pants for you Cody."

"Yeah, and Chip came by during lunch to visit me for a while too."

Tommy looked at me as he knelt in front of me.

"It was okay for Chip to come over here today, wasn't it?" I asked 
Tommy.

"Sure Cody, You needed a break today."

When I mentioned Chip, I thought I had gotten Sherry in a lot of 
trouble.

"Tommy, Chip told us his father drove a Nascar in three races before he 
had a bad accident and decided that he wasn't going to race anymore. 
Chip also said his mom and dad met that day at a race track in Georgia 
and they got married." I told Tommy as we walked to the bathroom

"Tommy, Do you think Mr. Gee would let me go to Chip's house for a 
sleepover one of these weekends?"

"You would have to talk that over with Karen." Tommy said as he 
unsnapped my Nascar plastic pants.

"You know what she says about having rules that apply to all the boys 
equality no matter how old they are. If you want to sleepover at Chip's 
house, then the other boys in your cottage would want to do the same 
thing."

"What if the guys thought I was going home for an overnighter?" I asked 
Tommy.

"You know Cody, None of the boys in cottage-A are allowed to do that. 
You guys are only allowed day visitors on the last Sunday of every 
mouth."

I backed up and sat on the toilet. Tommy picked up the wet diapers and 
put them in a plastic bag as I sat there thinking.

"I know Tommy. What if I told the guys I had to sleep over at Chip's 
house so we could do a homework project for school. The other guys 
wouldn't want to do it. The only thing they like about school is recess 
and lunchtime, in fact, Carl, Shawn, and Andre came home from school 
the day before I went to Chip's, complaining that they had to do extra 
homework because some of the other kids were goofing off in class when 
they shouldn't have been."

Tommy stood there thinking for a moment before saying: "I'll talk to 
Karen and see what she has to say about it. You know Cody, No matter 
what she says about it, You can't get angry. You have to accept her 
decision and abide by it Cody."

I wasn't happy about what Tommy had said, but I guess I hoped that this 
would be the exception to the rule.

I hoped that when Tommy talked to her that maybe I might be given a 
privilege that I should have at my age.

I needed to talk to boys my own age about things we had in common, like 
talking about the teachers we liked and didn't like. The rock groups we 
like to listen to on the radio. Movies that were coming out soon, just 
common things.

When I talked to any of the guys in cottage-A, it was Barney they 
liked, or what new toys their parents just brought them, or the best 
cartoons on T.V. on Saturday morning after work crew. I needed someone 
my age to talk to.

"I'm done Tommy. I told him from the bathroom.

"Hard or liquid?" Tommy asked me from the other room.

"Hard." I replied

"Hard-hard or hard-soft?"

"Hard soft."

"Black or brown?"

"Dark brown."

"Sounds like your doing a lot better Cody. Ready to get dressed?"

Yeah, Be there in a second Tommy."

I flushed the toilet and walked back into my room.

"Hop up on the bed and turn on your stomach Cody." Tommy said as I 
climbed up on the bed.

"Why on my stomach Tommy?" I asked as I lay back down on my stomach on 
my bed.

"Need to take your temp. Cody."

I thought about that for a second, looked over my shoulder and saw 
Tommy was holding a recital thermometer.

"What are you going to do with that Tommy?"

"Take your temperature Cody."

"Your not going to take it in my ear like usual?"

"No, we tried all three of the thermo ear probes, so I thought I would 
do it this way in case your temp. has gone down. Besides, this is the 
way we usually take the temp. of the boys in cottage-A."

When I heard Tommy say that to me, I didn't know what to say. I wanted 
to turn over and remind Tommy that I was thirteen years old and not a 
six year old.