BABY RICKY'S LIFE STORY 
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	Here's a little about me... I first realized I was a baby when I 
was very young. Actually, I think it was right after I was born. As I 
got older I wasn't allowed to be my true self anymore! I was told that 
I was getting too old for my baby things (diapers , bottles and other 
baby stuff) I was made to give it all up, against my will!! I was told 
to 'ACT' my age. 'GROW UP!!' You're too big for that. You're too old 
for cartoons! At 12 I was told that I would 'NOT' be getting toys 
anymore at Christmas because I was too old for them! I always felt that 
I was rushed to do something that I wasn't ready for: GROWING UP!! The 
funny thing was... I still knew that I was really a BABY! I just 
couldn't show it!! When I saw a baby-I envied them! I wished I could be 
in diapers again and be loved as the baby I was (and AM STILL!!)
	I wanted the comfort of a ba-ba, too. In school in 1st grade I 
heard about the kids in another class. If they were bad, they were made 
to wear a baby bottle tied around their necks all day. I wished I had 
that teacher because I would have been bad a lot!! I wanted to fill 
that ba-ba and nurse myself in heavenly bliss!! Can you understand?
	All through my school years I dreamed of being a diapered little 
baby again. I remember when I was about in 5th grade; A TV was brought 
into the classroom for some reason. An ad came on for Playtex plastic 
snap on baby panties (they were blue gingom checked.) OH GOSH HOW I 
WANTED THEM!!!
	I saved my lunch money and would go to the dime store and buy the 
biggest baby pants I could buy. I could barely fit into them, and they 
would tear sometimes. Usually though, I didn't have much money. So as 
an older kid, I would steal diapers and baby pants off clotheslines (on 
my bike) I would wear them, and hide them, sometimes wet them! Then 
sometimes I'd get so scared that I would get discovered and I would 
throw them out!! Then I missed them and I had to get more! I didn't 
often wet the bed then, but sometimes I did. That's what the rubber 
sheets were for! I knew I was different than other kids. I hardly EVER 
had friends! They knew I was different too! But they didn't know why! I 
didn't go through the teenage stage. I am not into being my age. I'm 
just me--A BABY! Not an ADULT BABY, because I haven't made it to 
'ADULT' yet (INSIDE) and I don't want to.
	I've got my baby things back but still no one understands me! 
Don't misunderstand- MY mom loved all her kids, and she showed it in 
many ways! She was a wonderful mom and I love her! My dad had anger 
problems. But I think he loved me. I was afraid of him! Now I am all 
alone, a mess! I've been in an institution. I've seen too many shrinks! 
I am done with that.
	I can't even keep jobs. I can't live as an adult! I love diapers 
and others baby things, but at night, I really need them, because I 
have diabetes and heart bypasses. I had nephritis, and now I have 
wetting problems (mostly at night, because of the need to pee a lot and 
a weak bladder) If I keep a bucket near the bed I can sometimes get up 
in time to use it. It's much easier to wear diapers and just not worry. 
For car trips or to take a long walk, diapers make me feel safe. I 
don't know how I could get by without them. I thought I was the only 
one that had these NEEDS until I got a computer. I am A little boy 
FOREVER! And I will always be a baby! Diapers are NOT a sexual thing 
for me at all. I want no part of adult feelings! I just wish I could 
take care of myself, that's all. I wish I had friends that understood 
me! I guess when you are a freak no one wants you!!

Well, That's my story!