DIAPER DESIRES: PART 21
-----------------------
While we waited for Lisa to get back, Suzy and I played another game
against each other while Cindy sat out and watched us. Just as Suzy finished the
game for me and won, Lisa came back into the room. This time she was carrying
the bag that contained my diapers and the other supplies.
"Okay, Chris, hop up on the bed!" ,she said.
"What for?" I asked, pretending that I didn't know what was going on.
"What do you mean 'what for?' You know why! Now get up there so I can
change your diapers!"
Immediately I looked at Suzy, who was now laughing.
"She already knows about it, Chris," said Lisa. "We told her first thing
when we got here! You think we're gonna keep it from her? She's gotta know about
it sometime!"
"Yeah, Chris! They told me all about it!" said Suzy. "They told me that
you kept pooping in your underwear so your mom made you wear diapers! And they
told me you have to stay in your diapers all day and you can't use the toilet
anymore and you have to wear your diapers to school! They told me that you can't
even wear pants at all unless you leave the house! They told me..."
Suzy continued to relay everything that she had been told about me by Lisa
and Cindy. I was too embarrassed to feel mad at Lisa and Cindy for telling her.
Actually, I couldn't get mad because I expected them to tell her sooner or later
and, realistically, there was no way that this could possibly remain a secret.
"I don't know what you were trying to hide, Chris," Suzy said as she
finished telling me everything she found out. "I saw that big bulge in your
pants right away! Just watching you try to hide it was funny! Oh, Chris, I wish
I had you for my brother! It'd be so funny to see you walking around the house
in your diapers all day long! You must look cute wearing them!"
I was really beginning to resent being thought of as looking "cute" in my
diapers! By this time Lisa had the diapers and everything ready to go as she set
them on the guest bed in the spare bedroom. "Chris, come on, now take your pants
off and hop up on the bed!" Lisa commanded.
"Can I ask Suzy to leave the room?" I requested politely.
"No!" Suzy said. "I wanna see what your diapers look like!"
"I'm not taking them off until Suzy leaves!" I demanded.
"You're taking them off right now, Chris!"
"I am going to stand here and do nothing until Suzy leaves!" I asserted.
"Okay, time to use force," said Lisa. "Cindy, help me hold him down! Suzy,
unfasten his pants!"
I tried to run out of the room, but Lisa and Cindy wouldn't let me go. In
the meantime, Suzy worked on undoing the pants and pulling them off, revealing
the thick diapers underneath. This episode was too humiliating, so I began
crying as I protested.
"He even cries like a baby!" Suzy commented.
"He's gonna cry some more if he doesn't get his butt on the bed! Now get
up there, Chris!"
I gave up the fight and climbed onto the bed, wearing only the diapers and
my shirt. "Look at his butt!" said Suzy as I climbed onto the bed. "His diapers
are so big!"
"He needs them," said Lisa. "This kid can really make a mess, as you shall
see in a moment."
Lying there helpless, Lisa pulled off my plastic pants and then my
diapers. I felt so embarrassed to have my diapers changed right in front of my
cousin Suzy. She watched as Lisa wiped up the big mess and applied the powder
and the lotion.
"Ooh, he does make big messes!" commented Suzy. "I can remember when we
were at your place, and Chris was still in diapers, he must have been four! I
guess he never learned, huh?"
"At one time, Chris actually used the toilet, but that's all history now,"
Lisa said. "He'll probably never use a toilet again because he'll never be out
of diapers!"
Lisa finished diapering me and said "okay, you're done!" I hopped down
from the bed and started to reach for my pants when she went ahead of me and
grabbed them.
"No, Chris, you can't have them!"
"Lisa, I have to have them!" I argued. "We're at grandma and grandpa's!
Everybody's here!"
"So?"
"I don't want them to find out! It's bad enough that Suzy already knows!"
"I'll just tell my mom and dad, anyway, Chris," said Suzy.
"No, Suzy, don't tell them, please!"
"Chris, I HAFTA tell them! It's too funny! You, an eight- year-old in
DIAPERS! It figures that you would be wearing them since you were so late in
your toilet training!"
"Come on! Gimme my pants!"
"No!" said Lisa. "Since you were such a bad boy and tried to get away when
I wanted to change you, I don't think you deserve to have them back!"
"Give 'em back!" I demanded. I grabbed one of the legs of the pants and
pulled on it as I tried to get my pants away from Lisa. Cindy joined Lisa in
pulling the pants away from me. Suzy sat there and watched my sisters and I play
an impromptu game of tug-o-war with my pants.
"Why do you want your pants? You certainly don't mind not wearing them at
home!"
"But I'm not at home! I can't be seen in diapers like this! Not in front
of grandma and grandpa and everyone else!"
"Yes you can! You're being a bad boy, Chris, and you are NOT getting your
pants back!"
"I'll call mom in here!" I warned. I continued to tug on the pants, trying
to get them away from Lisa. "MOM!" I shouted.
We continued pulling the pants in opposite directions when... RRIIIP! The
seam came apart right down the middle of the seat, splitting it into two! The
pants were poorly tailored anyway, so it was no surprise that they came apart
the way they did. The problem now was obvious-- I had no pants to wear!"
"Look what you did to your pants, Chris!" said Lisa.
"Look what *I* did? You wouldn't give them back!" I argued.
"You shouldn't have pulled on them! You knew they were cheap pants! And
now they're ruined and you have no pants to wear! Whose fault is THAT, Chris?!"
Mom came into the bedroom at about that time. Lisa and I were standing
across from each other with my torn pants lying on the floor between us.
"What was going on in here?!" mom asked, demanding an explanation.
"Chris ripped his pants!" Lisa started.
"Lisa wouldn't let me have them! I tried to get them from her and...!"
"Chris wouldn't let us change him, so I wouldn't let him...!"
"They were gonna let Suzy watch me get changed...!"
Lisa and I argued back and forth until mom said "Hold it! Hold it! HOLD
IT!"
As the argument stopped, mom asked, "okay, what is the problem, Lisa?"
"I changed Chris' diapers and I wouldn't let him have his pants back
because he wouldn't let us change him!"
"Why wouldn't you let her change you, Chris?"
"Because Suzy was in the room!"
"So? I'm sure she's seen a messy butt before."
"A baby's butt, maybe," I said, "but I'm eight years old!"
"Your messy butt is just bigger, Chris, that's all. Now how did the pants
get ripped, Lisa?"
"Chris tried pulling them away from me and they ripped."
"Now, Lisa, I don't think that it was necessary for you to keep his pants
away from him," mom said, as if to be taking my side of the issue for once.
"But, there's not a lot we can do now, so I guess Chris will have to do without
his pants today."
"What? What about Uncle Allen and Aunt Sharon? And grandma and grandpa?"
"They'll just have to see you in your diapers, Chris. I told you, they're
going to have to find out about it sooner or later, so now would be a good time
for them to find out."
"I'll just stay in here until we leave," I said, moping.
"You'll miss dessert then," mom said.
"I don't want dessert," I pouted.
"Oh, you do too, Chris!" mom countered.
"Okay, but bring it to me in here!" I demanded.
"You can't! Grandma won't let you guys eat in here, remember? Now come on,
Chris, don't be such a party-pooper!"
"He already is a party-pooper, if you know what I mean!" Lisa quipped. The
other two girls laughed.
Mom then grabbed my hand and pulled me out of the room, taking me down the
hall and out to the front room.
"No! No! Don't drag me out there like this!" I cried as I resisted.
"Look, Chris, you are only causing me and yourself more trouble and
embarrassment! Now you're coming out to the front room whether you like it or
not!"
"No, mom!"
"Alright, Cindy, Lisa, Suzy, I'll need you to all leave; Chris and I need
a moment alone!"
After the girls left the room, mom slammed the door shut. She immediately
pulled off the plastic pants and the diapers. Then, with my bare butt exposed,
she bent me over her knee and spanked me. She delivered three swift, stinging
swats to my behind. I started crying. "Now, enough of this! You've embarrassed
me and I'm ashamed of you!" Mom them refastened the diapers and pulled the
plastic pants back up. "Don't make me take these diapers off again unless you
need changed! Now, let's go!" I tried to stop crying as mom continued to drag me
out to the front room. As mom led me to the front room I was told to go sit down
next to my sisters. My dad and Uncle Allen were also in the room watching the
football game. Mom was headed outside to the car with my torn pants. "What
happened to his pants?" dad asked mom. "Chris tore them, right down the center!"
mom said as she showed dad the large tear in them. "How did he do that?" "I'll
explain later," mom answered as she opened the door and went out to the car. "My
goodness, Robert!" Uncle Allen said with surprise. "Your son is wearing
diapers!"
"He has been for about three weeks," my dad explained to him. "He had some
behavioral problems we had to deal with and we decided that this was the best
way to punish him. By the way, Chris, what did you do to your pants?"
"They got ripped," I answered in a low voice. "Lisa wouldn't give them to
me and I tried to grab them from her and she ripped them!"
"No, Chris, YOU ripped them! Mom even said YOU ripped them!"
"YOU ripped them, Lisa!" I argued.
"No, YOU did, Chris!"
"It was YOU, Lisa!"
"No it wasn't!"
"Yes it was!"
"No it wasn't!"
"Was too!"
"Was not!"
"Kids! Stop it!" dad shouted. "I mean it! Is that what you guys were
hollering about in there earlier?!"
"Yes, dad, we're sorry," I apologized.
"If you guys keep arguing, we'll just go home! I'm sure your grandparents
would be very disappointed if we did that since they planned this special day
for us to enjoy."
"Yes, dad," Lisa and I said in unison.
"Now just sit tight, grandma will have pie and ice cream for you guys
shortly."
"Anyway," my dad continued to explain to Uncle Allen, "Chris kept messing
in his underwear; sometimes they were accidents, sometimes they weren't. It got
to the point where it didn't matter, we just couldn't trust him anymore so we
decided that diapers were the only way to handle the problem."
The girls were all snickering as they listened to dad talk to Uncle Allen.
All I could do is sit there and feel even more embarrassed. Mom had since then
come back into the house, catching the last of what dad was telling Uncle Allen.
"...so he has to wear disposables to school and have the nurse change
him.," dad continued.
"I guess you have to do what you have to do, Robert," Uncle Allen
commented to my dad. "But I don't think he should have to wear diapers as
punishment. I think there are other ways to reinforce better behavior than
that."
"We tried other ways!" dad said loudly . Mom stood there and nodded
profoundly in agreement. "We grounded him, we took away his privileges, we even
made him sit in the bathroom all day! Several times! Nothing we could do worked!
We were desperate to get him to stop! Brenda and I finally agreed that diapers
was the only thing we could do! We were so fed up with him after we thought he
finally was toilet trained and we just couldn't take having to fight against it
any longer!"
"Now Chris can mess his diapers all he wants now!" mom added. "Now
everybody can have peace of mind!"
"But that means you have to deal with his dirty diapers all the time!"
Uncle Allen didn't seem to totally agree with my diaper punishment. "What makes
that any different than dirty underwear?"
"We couldn't see Chris ever improving his behavior, so we decided that if
he's going to poop into whatever he's wearing, make it diapers since that's what
they're made for."
"I guess we're lucky," Uncle Allen continued. "Suzy was easy to toilet
train, she took right to it! I can understand your frustrations over this, but
have you thought of how this affects Chris?"
"He's being punished, Allen. We're not doing it for his pleasure, you
know."
"Well, you may not know it, Robert, but maybe you *are* doing it for his
pleasure."
"How so?" dad questioned. Uncle Allen was always one to strike up a
debate, albeit a friendly one. Still, he liked to state his opinion and defend
it. His political views and dad's differed greatly and the topic always invited
the two to contest their views, but that's a different story. Also, as this
discussion involved behavior, Uncle Allen had an advantage in this discussion
since he took a few psychology courses when he went to college.
As Uncle Allen continued to validate his point, he went on saying "maybe
Chris likes to wear diapers and perhaps wanted to wear them and demonstrated
that want, so now he's wearing them. What does Chris think of wearing diapers?"
"I think he realizes what it's like to wear diapers when nobody else his
age wears them!" dad answered. "Well, except his best friend; he wears them,
too!"
"For the same reason?" Uncle Allen asked my dad.
"I don't know. Maybe you're right, Allen. Perhaps these kids have an inner
need to feel babied, maybe a fear of growing up."
"Well, from what I see, I don't think Chris minds having to wear them."
Dad was a peacekeeper, and if he sensed that anyone was wanting to debate
their side of an issue to the point that a real argument might erupt, dad would
just end it there. He did this by nodding in agreement and returning his
attention the football game.
So far Suzy, and now Uncle Allen, had been made aware of the fact that I
wore diapers and both of them knew why. However, grandma, grandpa, and Aunt
Sharon had yet to find out.
DIAPER DESIRES: PART 22
-----------------------
Grandma and Aunt Sharon came into the room, each carrying two plates of
apple pie and vanilla ice cream. As she came up to me I tried to close my legs,
trying to conceal the bulging diapers. The thickness of the diapers made this
impossible to do, so I bent forward instead, but this didn't conceal the sides
of the diapers. Grandma handed me my plate and asked "where are your britches?"
"They got ripped." Although it was unintentional, my use of the passive
voice prevented another argument between Lisa and I from ensuing. Lisa still got
in a shot and whispered "YOU ripped them!"
"Those are some skivvies you got on there" grandma observed of what she
could see of my diapers she handed Lisa her plate of the dessert. The lighting
was dim where we were sitting, so she probably assumed that the white of my
diapers was my underwear. Aunt Sharon was standing behind grandma handing Cindy
and Suzy their plates.
"They're diapers, grandma," Lisa told her. I was still sitting there,
hunched forward with my plate on my bare leg. Sharon looked over at me,
surprised, of course, to see me wearing diapers.
"Diapers?" Aunt Sharon said.
"Brenda, I didn't think you'd actually do it!" grandma said in surprise.
"I know you mentioned it a few times, but I thought you were kidding!"
This sounded to me that grandma had already been told what mom planned to
do if I kept having accidents the way I did. Grandma couldn't believe it at
first, but it was for real-- I was in diapers.
"No, mother, this time I was serious," mom said. "You heard Robert
explaining it to Allen. At first I was kidding when I thought of the idea, but
as the problem never seemed to improve, diapers were starting to look like a
more realistic option. We finally decided that since Chris was never going to
straighten up his act that he was going to wear diapers! You would, too, if you
had to put up with your kids' soiled underpants for four years!"
"You and Sharon were both early trainers," grandma said to mom, "so I
don't think I would have ever made either of you wear diapers. Your father hated
changing diapers and he would have done anything to avoid it."
Then Uncle Allen got in on the discussion. "You know, they say girls train
before boys. Suzy was out of diapers when she was only two! I don't know of
*anybody* who's gotten their boys out of diapers before turning three!" He was
hoping to open up another debate, but there was little to disagree on. Suzy and
my sisters both trained early. I was the only boy here, and, as everyone was
well aware, I was very difficult to train.
"Well, Chris is eight, going on nine!" dad said as he jumped into the
conversation.
"It wasn't just accidents," mom continued. "Chris started pooping his
underpants on purpose! That was the last straw! I discovered that he had been
hiding some of his soiled underpants in his room! That's when we..."
My attention had then been diverted to Lisa, who was telling cousin Suzy
what happened on that day not so long ago.
"Mom made Chris take off his pants and his underwear right on front of me
and Cindy and then she showed us how to diaper him!"
Everybody continued to talk about my wearing diapers. I felt embarrassed,
but powerless. I could do nothing but to listen to everyone carry on with how I
was so hard to potty train and how all the girls in the family potty trained
before the boys. Everyone agreed on Uncle Allen's statement as my boy cousins
were brought into the discussion and how they were all harder to toilet train.
I didn't want to feel embarrassed because I really did like to wear
diapers and felt "privileged" to have to wear them. Even with as much enjoyment
as I got out of being forced to wear diapers, I felt embarrassed. Who wouldn't
be? Most kids would be embarrassed to have their toilet training discussed so
openly as mine, especially the difficulties involved in it. Frequent accidents,
poopy underpants, wearing only diapers, having my sisters change me, having to
wear them to school, it was all embarrassing indeed. But, why did I like it? Do
most kids wish they could wear diapers? This is a question I continued to
struggle with for quite some time after I started wearing diapers again. I just
sat there, acting as passively as I could until the conversation shifted to
another topic.
In the meantime, grandpa was getting his slide projector ready and set up
for us. It was a Thanksgiving tradition (as well as other family holidays) to
view grandpa's slides. While Lisa and Cindy didn't care to sit through the whole
thing, I enjoyed them. The screen was up, lights were dimmed, the drapes were
shut and grandpa was ready for his presentation. He began showing his most
recent collection, followed by a look at some of the older ones that he had
proudly shown to us before.
Most of the older pictures consisted of pictures that grandpa had taken of
our birthdays and at other family gatherings. Then, as if by coincidence,
grandpa showed some pictures that I always felt to be embarrassing. He got
several pictures of me pouting as I was being forced to sit on my potty chair.
Lisa was holding me down as I struggled to get up.
Of course everyone else was getting a laugh out of all of this. Grandpa
explained that he had selected the slides that he wanted to show before everyone
came over, so it was a coincidence that he included the pictures he got of me
during my toilet training.
In addition, there were several pictures of me waddling around in only a
diaper when I was four years old. Mom usually kept me in just a diaper so that
she could check me more easily, so it was only natural that grandpa would get
several shots of me dressed the way I was now, except for that I had a
disposable diaper on in the pictures.
After the slide show, grandpa decided to get a few pictures of the family
for this year's Thanksgiving. Every year he had us get into a group and he'd get
a picture of all of us. Of course, I realized that this year I would be in only
my diapers if I were in the group picture, which I was expected to be.
"Okay, everybody, stand by the fireplace," grandpa said as he prepared his
camera for the shot. Before I got into the shot, I went up to mom and asked her
if I had to be in the picture.
"Of course you do, Chris. Grandpa wants to remember who was all here this
Thanksgiving!"
"But, I'm only in my diapers, mom!"
"Well, Chris, it's hardly a secret anymore. Everyone's seen you wearing
them anyway, and they probably will again, so there's no point hiding it
anymore."
"Yes, but now I'm gonna look like this in one of grandpa's pictures!"
"So? Only the family will see it, and like I said, we've all seen you in
your diapers anyway. Now get up and get in the picture!"
I stood before the camera nervously, placing my hands over my diapers to
cover what I could of them. Grandpa set the timer and then ran back to join us.
Then went the flash! I was now forever photographed in my diapers with the rest
of the family! Of course grandpa always liked to get at least two shots in case
one didn't turn out. After the shot, Lisa said "Chris. you're gonna look cute
standing there in your DIAPERS! I can't wait to see it!"
By this time, I realized that this was no longer a really big secret and I
was feeling more at ease being in front of the family. Just as I had gotten used
to being in front of my own family in diapers, I was accepting the fact that the
others in the family were well aware of it. The only one who ever questioned it
was Uncle Allen, and his point was right, that I did want to wear diapers and
that my parents were actually encouraging such behavior rather than preventing
it.
It was starting to get dark outside and more snow started falling. It
looked like we were in for a long drive home. Before we left, mom reminded Cindy
to check my diapers and change them if necessary. She had me lie down on the
guest bed as she removed the plastic pants and the diapers. I was wet but not
poopy. Lisa was helping mom gather up the dishes that we brought for the
Thanksgiving dinner and Suzy was helping her mom, so only Cindy was there in the
room changing me. After I was changed, mom grabbed everyone's coats as we headed
out the door. I said goodbye to everyone and walked out to the car, again
enduring the cold wind against my bare legs. Dad had started the car and got it
warmed up, thank goodness.
It was a long drive home. The snow kept coming down, blowing against us.
Dad could drive no faster than thirty miles an hour. As grandma and grandpa
lived over thirty miles away from us, it would be at least an hour's drive
before we got home. While dad was careful enough to get us home safely, several
cars had slid off the road. The storm picked up in intensity as we got closer to
home. Finally, what was, as I could judge, over an hour later, we were home. I
played a couple games of Nintendo and started working on my Christmas wish list
before I went to bed that night. Lisa also changed my diaper once more before I
went to bed, which was earlier than normal as I was tired.
FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 24, 1989
I got up at around 9:00 the next morning and took a look outside. The yard
was once again covered with snow. It had to have been at least a foot deep! I
know that school would have been cancelled if we didn't have the day off
already. Cindy started off my day by checking my diapers and, as I made a big
mess in them, changed them as well. After the diaper change, she and Lisa were
outside tracking up the new-fallen snow. As I sat by the front window and
watched them, they saw me sitting there and threw snowballs at the window.
Mom was getting ready to take advantage of the big sales around town. Of
course Cindy went along with her as she always liked to do. I gave mom my list
of things I wanted for Christmas before she took off. She took a quick glance at
it before folding it up and putting it in her purse. Her eyes bulged as she
looked at the long list of Nintendo games I wanted to get. "You'll need to
narrow this list down a little," said mom as she left.
Later that day Tony stopped by. I greeted him as I let him in the house.
"Brr! It is COLD out there!" said Tony.
"How was your Thanksgiving?" I asked him.
"Oh, it was great!" he exclaimed joyfully. "I saw my cousins from back
east for the first time! How was yours?"
"Oh, it was okay," I said. "Just about everyone in the family knows I wear
diapers now."
"What did they all say? Did they laugh?"
"My cousin Suzy did. My grandma and grandpa and my aunt and my uncle were
just kinda surprised. Everyone got to talking about it, asking why I was wearing
them, you know, stuff like that."
"Really?" Tony replied.
"Yeah, it made me feel embarrassed since they all talked about my toilet
training."
From that point, the topic shifted to other things such as what we had for
dinner, what we wanted for Christmas. I showed Tony the catalog I was looking at
and all the Nintendo game titles that I circled.
"I've got this one!" Tony pointed out. "Don't get it; it sucks! This one's
cool! Get it!"
"If my mom gets it, I will."
Tony wanted to go outside and have a snowball fight with me, but he knew
that I was unable to go outside since all I could wear was diapers. He really
wanted to go outside to play and he asked me if I knew where my pants were.
"I have no idea!" I said. "Even if I did know where they were I couldn't
wear them. Lisa ripped them yesterday and I had to spend the rest of the day at
my grandma an' grandpa's in my diapers, just like I do here at home."
"Really!" he said. "How did they get ripped?"
"Lisa and I got in a fight because after she changed me she wouldn't give
me my pants back so I tried to get them back from her and they ripped!"
As the topic returned once again to diapers, I asked him if anyone in his
family found out about his diapers.
"One of my cousins did, my cousin Robby. I told him I was a bedwetter and
I had to wear them. I didn't want to tell him that I just like to wear them."
About an hour later, Tony asked me if he could use one of my disposables
since he had wet and messed his diaper.
"Yeah, but remember, I have to have these for when I go to school, so you
can't use them all the time," I told him.
"I know! I'm just really a mess right now and I need to get a clean diaper
on."
"Okay, my disposables are in the top drawer on the left," I directed him.
He pulled out one of the diapers and looked it over for a second. He then
immediately proceeded to take off his pants and then his diaper, which, as he
reported to me, was very much soiled. The room started to stink after he had the
diaper off. For some reason, his poop seemed to smell worse than mine. I was
used to the smell of my own dirty diapers, but his seemed to have a different,
and more foul odor.
Tony asked me to hand him my supply of wipes and my powder. He stood right
where he was, on my changing pad, on which some of the excess poop from his butt
had dropped onto it. He performed his own changing along with cleaning himself
up and applying the powder to his own body. Then he put the diaper on. "Hey!" he
exclaimed. "I wish my mom would get me some of these! They're thicker!"
Lastly, he put his pants back on. They went on him more tightly because he
had on one of my thicker disposables instead of the diapers he wore, the
thinner, "regular" kind. "Yeah, these are even better than mine!" Now I could
tell that he had a diaper on as there was a bulge underneath his pants that
wasn't as visible when he wore his own diapers.
"Now I can tell you're wearing a diaper-- I can see it under your pants--
so you might want to think about wearing thicker diapers to school," I advised
him.
"They probably think I wear them anyway," Tony reasoned, "since they know
you wear them and that they know you and I are best friends and..."
"It's up to you, but I can *definitely* tell you're wearing a diaper,
Tony."
He didn't seem to mind, even though I knew he didn't want anyone at school
to find out. He took his old diaper and went out to the back of the house where
we kept the garbage cans so that he could dispose of it. As Lisa was in her
bedroom, it was easy for him to sneak by her. If Lisa knew that Tony changed his
own diaper, she would have told him that he wasn't allowed to change his own
diaper while he was in our house because he had to go by "our" rules.
Furthermore, I didn't want Lisa to know that Tony used one of my diapers. She
would have snitched and then I'd have to start wearing the really thick cotton
diapers with plastic pants to school again.
Another hour or so passed before my mom and Cindy got back from the mall
or wherever they went to do the Christmas shopping. They both came in carrying
several large packages. One of the bags was from Kidz Klothez, the store where I
discovered mom was buying my diapers, looked like it was stuffed full. I had a
feeling that I would probably get more diapers for Christmas this year. I was
pretty certain that was what mom had bought since mom wouldn't have bought
anything for Cindy while she was there with mom, and Lisa was too old to wear
the clothes they carried there.
It was late in the afternoon when Tony decided that he should get going.
Just as he was about to head out the door he said "maybe you can stay over
tonight!"
"Well, let me ask my mom. She probably won't let me, but I'll ask her."
"I'll just wait right here," Tony said as he came back into the house
again.
Mom was in her bedroom wrapping Christmas gifts. I knocked on the door.
"Can I come in?"
"Yes, Tony, come on in."
Mom was in the middle of wrapping what I assumed was either a gift for dad
or for grandpa. I knew it wasn't one of my presents. I asked mom if I could stay
over at Tony's house.
"Well, I don't know, Chris. You don't have any pants to wear, for one
thing."
I knew that I had my other pants for wearing to school with my
disposables. I suggested to mom that I could wear a disposable and wear the
other pants with those.
"No, I don't want any of those disposables diapers being used except for
school! You'll have to wear what you've got on now, I'm afraid."
I stood there and thought for a moment. I figured that Tony's mom and his
sister Kara had also seen me in my diapers, so there was really no reason for me
to have any pants on while I was there. "Well,," I uttered as I hesitated on
this thought for a moment. "I can go over there like this, I guess."
"Who's going to change you?"
"I can, can't I?"
"Now, Chris, part of your punishment is not being allowed to change your
own diapers! You know that!"
"So, I can't stay, huh?"
"Let me think about it."
I went up to Tony, who was now sitting on the couch.
"What'd she say? Can you stay?" he asked.
"I don't know," I answered. " My mom's thinking about it."
"Thinking about what? She didn't just say yes or no?"
"No," I replied as I started to ramble on to Tony about what was going on.
"It's because of all these rules that they've got. I can't wear disposables
except for in school, so I have to wear these diapers, and since my pants are
ripped I'd have to go over there like this, so I told mom that I would since
your mom and your sister have seen me in these diapers anyway, and then my mom
said that I can't change my own diapers and..."
"Why do they have all these rules? Why don't they just let you wear what
you want?"
"Because it's for punishment! If they *let* me do anything, then it's not
punishment."
Mom then came out and said "okay, you can stay at Tony's."
"Alright!" I exclaimed.
"But," mom added. "you will have to go over there in just your diapers
since I haven't bought any new ones for you yet."
"Okay," I replied, since I knew that this was the case.
"And," mom continued, "I will be bringing one of the girls by to change
you".
"Aww, mom! Can't I just change them myself? Just this once?"
"No, Chris, we already discussed that. You're lucky I'm letting you stay
at all!"
"Okay," I sighed, "when can I go over there?" I asked Tony.
"Whenever you can," he replied.
"I'll take you over after your dad gets home and we have dinner," mom
said. "Get your stuff ready."
"Can I have dinner at Tony's?"
"Well, you can, but I'm making a turkey casserole from the leftovers. I
know you'd hate to miss it, Chris."
"Okay, I'll stay for dinner first.," I agreed.
Tony headed out the door. "See you later tonight," he said as he left. I
went to my room and got my things together. All I needed was a clean shirt, my
toothbrush and some of my Nintendo games.
DIAPER DESIRES: PART 23
-----------------------
It was a little after 6:00 before dad got home from work. He was running
late. "Damn traffic!" dad grumbled as he came in from the garage.
While mom was getting dinner ready, she reminded Lisa to change me before
we ate and I left for Tony's. I lay down on the changing pad and noticed that
Tony didn't clean up after himself after he changed. There was still poop on the
changing pad from when he took off his own diaper. Lisa noticed it as I lay
down.
"What's this?" she asked as she pointed to the small mess.
"Uh, it looks like poop...but it's not mine."
"I know it's poop, Chris! How did it get there?"
"I said it's not mine!" I defended.
"Yeah, and who *else* wears diapers around here, huh?"
"Tony! He changed his diaper when he was here earlier!"
"I see," Lisa replied. "You know that he's not allowed to change his own
diapers while he's here!"
"He seemed to do just fine today."
"Yeah, and he left a mess, too! Since he can't clean up his own messes,
that means you probably can't either!"
"Yeah I can!" I argued. "I can too change myself!"
"Maybe, but why should we let you? At least when I change you, you get all
nice and clean and there's no mess and your diaper is always on nice and tight
like it should be! Now just be a good boy and let your sis' keep changing you
for awhile!"
After I was changed I sat down at the dinner table. A couple minutes later
mom turned to dad and said "Chris is going over to Tony's after we eat dinner."
"Oh? I thought we agreed that Chris was not allowed to go anywhere."
I thought that dad was going to change mom's mind and I wouldn't be
allowed to stay at Tony's house. Mom persuaded him to be more lenient.
"I think he's entitled to spend the night still. Tony's house is probably
the only place he'll want to stay anyway."
"Okay, but he *is* going to be wearing his diapers, right?"
"Of course! He has nothing else to wear!"
"Who's changing him?"
"I've got that all figured out, dear," mom assured dad. "I'll take one of
the girls over later this evening and then again in the morning."
"Why can't I just change my own diapers?" I interrupted. "Tony can change
his."
"You're not Tony, you're Chris," mom rebutted. "And Chris *doesn't* change
his own diapers, and that's our rule, so you'd better follow it. You just got
one of your privileges back tonight, so I wouldn't blow it now."
"Okay. When will you be by tonight?" I asked mom.
"We'll check on you at about 9:30 or so."
After we finished dinner mom got the car warmed up. I got my stuff ready
and in a few minutes we headed over to Tony's. I put on my coat, my shoes, and
socks. My legs, of course, were bare, which, upon arriving at Tony's house, made
for a cold walk between the car and the front door of Tony's house.
Tony's mom came to the door and invited us in. "Hi, Chris, hello Brenda,"
she greeted us. Although Tony's mom noticed that I had no pants on-- judging by
the way she looked at me-- she otherwise did not seem to be too moved. She just
said "Go ahead into Tony's room; he's in there playing."
I walked straight into his bedroom and saw Tony kneeling down in front of
his race track getting it set up.
"Hi Tony," I said.
"Oh, hi Chris!" he greeted me.
"Wanna race against me?" he offered. "I'm almost done setting this track
up."
"Sure!"
"What car you wanna be? Red or blue?"
"Uh, red!" Red was my favorite color, so it was only natural that I choose
the red one. I helped him finish setting up the track first.
"Okay, ready? Set? Go!"
We had a couple of quick races, winning one each, and then we went for a
tie-breaker. Just as we started the last race I heard mom shout 'Chris, I'm
taking off!'"
Usually this meant that mom wanted to tell me a couple of things before
she left. She also liked to give me a goodbye kiss before leaving me with
someone else. Even though mom was always strict with discipline and punishment--
which was now making me wear diapers-- she always let us kids know that she
loved us. I went out to the front room to see mom off. "Remember to be ready for
a change at around 9:30. I'll pick you up at around noon tomorrow, okay?"
"Noon? Can I stay longer?" I pleaded.
"Well, there's no sense bringing the girls by to change you in the
morning, only to come back again a couple hours later to pick you up."
"I can change him tomorrow," Tony's mom offered.
"You sure, Sandy?" my mom asked Tony's mom. "You'll change him?"
"Of course!" Tony's mom pledged. "It hasn't been *that* long since I've
had to change diapers myself."
"Okay, I'll bring some extra diapers for Chris later tonight. Gimme me a
kiss, Chris," mom asked of me as she bent down. I was embarrassed to kiss mom in
front of Tony, but it was a nice gesture that I knew that some mothers did not
extend to their children, so I was glad to have such a mom that did. "I'll pick
up you up at two instead, be ready!"
Mom was then gone. Tony and I ran back to his room and continued running
his cars around the track, using different cars with each race. We lost track of
who was ahead, but it didn't matter since we were just having fun.
There was one thing that stuck in my mind. I wasn't so sure if I could
allow yet another person to change my diapers. Already there was my own mom, who
only changed me occasionally, plus Lisa and Cindy, who each got most of the
diaper-changing duties. Then there was the school nurse, who I regarded as
someone completely neutral and didn't mind having her change me. But now Tony's
mom? I tried to think of her as a neutral person, too, but I knew Tony's mom, I
knew her by her personality, not someone whose job was to change diapers and
perform other medical duties. Tony's mom was like a second mom, or perhaps more
like an aunt. She was an adult whom I respected, but, just because she wasn't my
own mother, it was hard for me to accept having her change me. Maybe it was
because I didn't expect her to change me more than just this one time, so if I
could avoid having her change me at all, I'd probably feel better. The best
thing would have been just to allow me to change myself for once!
Tony's mom called us out to the kitchen for some ice cream. I sat myself
down at the table, sitting across from Tony and next to his sister Kara. Tony's
mom handed us each a dish of ice cream and a glass of soda. As Tony's mom stood
at the sink washing dishes, the four of sat at the table and enjoyed our ice
cream.
"Kara turned to me and asked me "how long have you weared diapers, Chris?"
"You mean '*worn* diapers', Kara," her mom corrected. "We say 'worn', not
'weared.'"
What an example for Kara to learn proper grammar! Putting her lesson to
use, she turned to me again and asked "Okay, then I say how long have you *worn*
diapers?"
"Uh, for about a month," I replied.
"Which month? I know *all* my months! January, Feh-bruary, uh, Ma-arch,
April..."
As Kara continued to recite the twelve months of the year, Tony's mom said
"You'll have to excuse her, Chris, she's been learning all these new things in
kindergarten!"
After she finished she asked me "where are your pants?"
"Uh, I don't have any now," I replied hesitantly.
"Is that why you're always in just your diapers. Chris?" Tony's mom asked
me.
"Uh, well, Mrs. Simmons, I..."
"Chris, you can just call me Sandy." Tony's mom always told me that I
could call her by her first name, but I always felt that it was more proper to
address her as "Mrs. Simmons" out of respect. His mom was easy to talk to as she
was always open and frank, although I had never discussed my wearing diapers
with her. From what Tony had told me, she was much easier on him when it came to
having him wear diapers.
"Do you have any pants at all?" she asked me plainly.
"I only get to wear pants to school," I explained, "and also when we see
relatives. My sister ripped my pants while we were over at my grandma and
grandpa's yesterday, so...that's why I came over here in my diapers."
"Does your mom make you wear just your diapers, or is just because you
wear such thick diapers that you never have any pants on?"
"It's both," I explained. "I wear disposable diapers to school, and my
pants fit over them, but I have to wear these diapers the rest of the time, and
I used to have some pants that fit over these, but they got ripped."
"So you don't have any to wear now?"
"Not until my mom gets me some more."
"You know, Chris, I think maybe your mom is being a little too strict,"
Tony's mom started. "I mean, Tony wears diapers because he said that he wanted
to. When I picked him up from your house and saw him wearing them, I didn't know
what to think. I know he came down with diarrhea, which is what he told me, but
I kind of knew that he wanted to wear them anyway. Later I asked Tony about it
again, and he told me that he wanted to wear them, and I said 'okay, I'll get
you some diapers, but you have to use them from now on, as long as you want to
wear them at least, and you have to change them yourself and make sure that you
keep yourself clean'. Tony agreed with that, so there was no punishment
involved, he just has to consider the consequences and the responsibility."
As Tony's mom was being quite straightforward and objective in this
discussion, I felt more at ease and now I didn't think that having her change me
would be so bad. But yet if she gave Tony the freedom to change his own diapers-
- not to mention giving him the privilege of wearing them in the first place--
why was she going to change me tomorrow, or was she?
"So are you still changing me tomorrow?" I asked her, no hesitation, it
just rolled out smoothly.
"Actually, Chris, I think you can change your own diapers just fine. I
don't think your sisters should have to change you, or anyone else. I wouldn't
have Kara change Tony, even if Kara were older than he is. I have Tony wear
diapers as a privilege on his part, not a punishment."
"So, you're not changing me?, I asked her.
"Not unless you want me to, but I think you can do it yourself just fine,"
she smiled.
After we finished eating our ice cream we went to the TV and popped in one
of the games I brought over.
"Your mom's really cool about letting you wear diapers!" I told Tony.
"Yeah, she was going to ground me and not let me wear them at first, but
then she asked me why I was wearing them. I told her the truth, I wanted to wear
them. I couldn't really lie about it, although I did tell her at first I had
diarrhea, which I did. That wasn't really a lie, but I felt that if I told her
the real reason, she may let me have my way. It pays to tell the truth, you
know."
In between game plays, we talked more about wearing diapers.
"I think my mom knew about it before," Tony added. "She'd come into my
bedroom to get my laundry and she'd see my underwear all poopy because sometimes
I'd put on about eight to ten pairs of it and then it would be like a diaper and
I just poop in it. I got excited doing it, I don't know why, I just did. She got
upset at me, but she didn't do much of anything to stop me."
"I used to do that," I added. "But that's how I got caught. My parents
didn't make it so that they were *letting* me wear diapers, like your mom does.
My mom and dad made it a punishment and they *make* me wear diapers. The only
thing I don't like is having to wear them to school, and that my sisters make
such a big deal out of it."
As I sat there playing games, I thought back to that day when I was caught
almost a month ago. I envisioned coming home and being confronted by my mom. I
wished that I could have just said "I want to wear diapers" and then mom would
have said "okay, Chris, I'll get you some diapers, but since you want to wear
them, I expect you to use them, this includes school." At least that wouldn't
have been as tough as getting scolded the way I did. I felt a sense of envy
toward Tony since his mom was so much easier on him.
I hoped that the next time my parents brought up any sort of issue
concerning my diapers that I could try to sway their mode of thinking from
putting me through this for punishment to letting me do this as a privilege. I
realized that Tony and I had such remarkable similarities in that we both
enjoyed wearing diapers, and that our experiences leading up to diaper-wearing
were quite the same. The difference was in the way his mom handled it versus how
my parents handled it. Tony only had his mom; his parents were divorced. Maybe
if only my mom were involved it wouldn't have turned out the way it did on my
side.
These thoughts continue to turn over in my mind. I didn't develop any
outright resentment towards my parents, I just wish they saw it the same way
that Tony's mom did. The more I thought about the way it turned out for Tony,
the more I wished my mom would have handled the situation in the same way.
It was about 9:30, just as I had expected, when mom returned with Lisa.
They both came into the house. Mom was carrying the pail, powder, and lotion.
Lisa had several diapers and a pair of plastic pants. "Where should I do this?"
Lisa asked Tony's mom.
"Tony's room would probably be okay," she replied.
"Okay, Tony, show me the way," Lisa said to him.
She went in there and told me to lie down on the floor.
"How are we going to do this with this race track in the way?" she said.
"Guess we'll have to do it on Tony's bed."
I got up on Tony's bed as Lisa stripped off my messy diapers and cleaned
me up. It wasn't any different than getting changed in my own bedroom. As I lay
there I kept thinking how much longer would I have to be changed by my sisters.
There was really no reason for them to do it. But then, there was no point
trying to argue against my parents who just didn't want me to change my own
diapers, whether or not I was capable of changing myself.
Lisa finished re-diapering me as she looked at Tony and asked him if he
needed a change.
"Yes, but I can do it myself, and I'm in MY house now, so you can't change
me here!"
"If you need changed, then why are you still in your *dirty* diaper?" Lisa
asked him.
"I just haven't changed it yet, but I'll do it right now before you try to
change me!"
"I think I can do a better job than you can!"
"Lisa! Stop!" I demanded. "Tony can change his own diapers! He's not your
brother, so you can't change him!"
"Okay, Chris, I'll let him change his own diaper if that's how he wants to
be!"
"He can change his own diaper at our house, too!" I added.
Lisa just left it as that as she got up and left the room. "Here's your
diapers for tomorrow," she said as she set them down on the floor with a clean
pair of plastic pants. She also left a supply of wipes and a container of
powder. "Bye, Chris," she said as she left.
Tony then went ahead and did his own diaper change. He pulled off his
pants and tossed them aside. He was still wearing the same diaper he put on over
at my house earlier in the afternoon. It was mostly wet, although he did poop in
it, too. He wiped himself clean and applied the powder. He then grabbed the
diaper that he had ready and put it on. He pulled it up onto himself tightly and
securely. He left his pants off as he was going to be going to bed soon.
We wanted to play a few more games on Tony's Nintendo set, but since the
news was going to be on, we had to let Tony's mom watch it. Tony and I went
through his collection of older MAD magazines while we waited to get the TV
back, which was after Johnny Carson delivered his monologue. We only got to play
for another half hour before Tony's mom decided that we should go to bed. Kara
kept wanting to show us her new Little Mermaid pajamas. Kara was really proud to
show them off, plus that she kept talking about the movie itself, how much she
liked it and everything that happened in the movie. I never saw the movie
myself, but I got an idea of what happened after hearing everything that Kara
had to say about it.
Tony and I then went to bed. I had to sleep with a couple of blankets on
me while lying on top of three couch cushions that Tony let me borrow from the
living room. It still wasn't as comfortable as a bed would have been, but it
beat sleeping on the floor itself.
We stayed up for about an hour and talked about different things.
"So, what do you want for Christmas?" I asked Tony.
"I'd like some Nintendo games, some more Hot Wheels and Matchbox cars,
some MAD books, a few games. What about you, Chris?"
"The same. I asked for a lot of Nintendo games, but I don't think I'll get
many. I'll probably get clothes, mostly shirts. I think I'm getting more diapers
for Christmas."
"Did you ask for diapers, Chris?"
"No, but I saw a bag from the Kidz Klothez store from when my mom and
Cindy went shopping. I know my mom got me diapers."
"Really? If I asked for diapers, I wonder of I would get them."
"Do you want more diapers, Tony? For Christmas?"
"I'd like some thicker ones. Like yours, with plastic pants. These just
don't last as long before I feel that they're full."
"Just ask then, your mom already knows that you wear them because you like
to."
"Yeah, but, for *Christmas?* What do you think my mom would think?"
"She'd probably get them, Tony."
"Then I wouldn't get as many toys."
"That's true, but would you give up some new toys for some better
diapers?"
Tony paused for a moment as he thought it over. "I dunno, I might, unless
it was a really cool toy that I really, really wanted."
Shortly afterwards I trailed off and fell asleep. As uncomfortable as it
was for me to lay on three couch cushions, I still managed to get to sleep. I
did wake up in the middle of the night when the dog next door to Tony started
barking. After that I had a hard time getting back to sleep again. While I was
lying awake I had to wet my diapers. I knew that I was allowed to change my own
diapers, according to Tony's mom, but I couldn't do that very easily at what
seemed like 3:00 in the morning. I decided to leave them on and change in the
morning since I was used to lying in bed in wet diapers anyway.
DIAPER DESIRES: PART 24
-----------------------
SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 25, 1989
As I woke up in Tony's room that morning I was well aware that I had wet
diapers on. I lay there as I waited for Tony to show some signs of life. I
always felt awkward to be at Tony's house and to get up and be doing things
before he did. I wanted to know what time it was, but Tony's alarm clock was too
hard to read from where I was lying down. As it was overcast outside I wasn't
able to tell from where the sun was in the sky. I got up and hunched over Tony,
who was still sleeping, to look at his alarm clock. It read 8:12, which was
about when I liked to get up.
There was one more thing I noticed while I looked at Tony lying there
sleeping. He was sucking on his thumb! Just as a baby would, he was in a diaper
and sucking on his thumb! I wondered if he was aware of his doing this in his
sleep. I stood there and looked at him, lying there sound asleep, or at least I
presumed he was. He started to shift his sleeping position as I lay back down on
my own makeshift "bed".
I wasn't able to get back to sleep, but yet I didn't just want to get up
and go about my business as if were at home. I lay there and looked at various
things around his room. He had model cars lined up along the top of his
bookshelf. He had several posters of sports cars tacked up all around his room.
Cars were his thing, and I had a feeling he'd probably become a mechanic when he
got older. Maybe a race car driver. I didn't know what I would be. These and
other thoughts passed through my mind as I lay there.
Then, as I was lying on my side I was staring through the space underneath
Tony's bed. Across the carpet on the opposite side of the bed was a small
object. I couldn't quite tell what it was until I tried to get a closer look. It
looked like a pacifier! Was Tony more of a baby than I thought? He wore diapers-
- but then so did I--but he also sucked on his thumb, and now, a pacifier!
I wasn't so sure if I should tell Tony that I saw what I assumed was his
pacifier lying on the floor. I was his best friend, so I would hope he would
trust me enough to know about it. But why tell him, I reasoned. I might mention
his thumbsucking, but I decided to let him keep his pacifier a secret.
Tony then woke up.
"Chris?" he whispered. "You awake?"
"Yeah. What time is it?"
"Uh, 8:51."
"You wanna go watch cartoons?" I asked.
"Okay. You like Bugs Bunny? He'll be on at 9:00."
"Yeah, let's go!"
Tony and I then went out to the living room and turned the TV on. Tony's
mom was sitting at the kitchen table reading the newspaper. "Good morning,
boys," she greeted.
"Morning," said Tony.
"Would like some pancakes?"
"Yeah, sure!" Tony said.
"What about you, Chris?" Tony's mom asked me.
"Yeah, I'll have some," I accepted.
While Tony's mom started making the pancakes, we went to the TV and tuned
into the Bugs Bunny and Tweety show. Since Kara was still asleep we had to keep
the volume down. I had a hard time laughing quietly since I found Looney Tunes
cartoons to be quite amusing every time I watched them.
Tony's mom came into the room and handed us each a plate of pancakes with
butter and syrup, along with a glass of milk. Kara had gotten up at about that
time. She sat with us and watched for the remainder of the show. She was also
given some pancakes for her breakfast.
I still hadn't yet changed my diaper, and I was in need of using it again.
I needed to poop this time. I tried to be as inconspicuous about it as I could,
with Kara sitting next to me, but I couldn't help but to make it noticeable that
I was having a bowel movement. It was a big bowel movement, filling up my
diapers quickly. It also smelled strong. Kara knew what I had just done.
"You go poopoo in your diaper, Chris? You stink!" she laughed.
I waited until the show was over and went back into Tony's room to do my
first diaper change on my own. Tony went in there with me at the same time to
change his.
I pulled the plastic pants off easily enough. Next were my wet, poopy
diapers. I undid the fasteners and let the diapers drop off of me to the floor.
The smell quickly became much stronger.
I was a real mess! The entire diaper was full of my big, stinky mess. My
entire backside was smeared all over with sticky, stinky poop. It felt awkward
to try cleaning myself up thoroughly and I wanted to ask Tony to help me, but
didn't think he'd want to wipe up his best friend's butt. When I thought about
it, I would have felt really awkward having him stand behind me and wipe me up.
I know that I could never do it for Tony. I did, however, ask Tony how he
managed to clean himself up.
"You do it enough times and you get good at it," he replied. "It took me a
few tries to get it right and not leave any poop on my butt." It didn't help
matters that Tony's room did not have a mirror. I didn't want to ask Tony to
inspect me, either, so I just had to hope I would get it all myself. After I
felt like I had done a good enough wiping job on myself, I got my diapers ready.
I unfolded one of the clean diaper and wrapped it around me, securing the
fasteners. As I was always to be double-diapered, I put another one on and
fastened it up. Last were the plastic pants, which went on quite easily.
Knowing that I was perfectly capable of performing my own diaper change, I
began to wonder if I would ever be allowed to do my own changes. Just to be
sure, I wanted things to look like that Tony's mom had done the diaper change.
"How do I look?" I asked Tony. "Does it look right?"
"It looks good enough to me," he said.
"Does it look like I did it? I just don't want Lisa or Cindy changing me
and thinking I changed my own diapers."
"I'd never know it," he said. "You might want to pull the plastic pants up
higher, though," he recommended.
I wasn't sure what to do with my dirty diapers. For the time being I left
them in the pail. I didn't know whether to have Tony's mom wash them or just
take the pail home with me, dirty, smelly diapers and all. Tony's mom asked me
if I had changed and I said "yes".
"Go ahead and give me your dirty diapers, I'll wash them."
I went back in the room and gave Tony's mom the diapers. She went into the
washroom and rinsed out the excess matter, then immediately threw them into the
wash.
The rest of the day at Tony's seemed to pass quickly as we diverted
ourselves in several activities. Before I knew it, it was two o'clock, just when
mom said she would pick me up. I quickly gathered up my stuff from Tony's room.
Even my diapers were washed and dried and ready to go. I put on my shoes and
socks and my coat. "Bye, Tony, see you Monday," I said as I left. "Thanks, Mrs.
Sim-, uh...Sandy," I said to Tony's mom, trying to break myself of the habit of
addressing her by last name. She smiled as I followed mom out the door. Soon I
was back home and everything was back to normal.
Later that evening Lisa changed me. I had only wet the diapers excessively
but I hadn't yet messed them again. Because of this, Lisa could tell that I
missed some spots on myself when I wiped up my mess from earlier.
"Somebody missed a spot on you, Chris. It doesn't look like Tony's mom did
such a great job. Or, did she even change you?"
"Yeah, she did."
"I have a feeling you changed yourself, Chris."
"No I didn't!" I lied. "Tony's mom changed me!"
"Well, maybe she outta start changing Tony's diapers so she can get some
practice! There's a poopy stain on the inside of your diaper, Chris, but I can
tell you only wet in it. Hmm, I'm starting to wonder just who really changed
you."
I couldn't push this any further, I had to tell the truth. "Okay, Lisa,
you're right, I changed my diaper while I was at Tony's."
"I had a feeling you would," she said. "But that's okay, because now we
know that you can't do a good enough job cleaning yourself up."
"Yeah, but if I do it a few more times then I could do it by myself okay.
That's what Tony told me."
"But we're not going to let you do it yourself, so you'll never get good
at it and you'll always need Cindy or me to change you! I can't wait until
you're twelve and I'm sixteen and I'll still be changing you! Ha! ha!"
As I lay there in thick, freshly changed diapers, I imagined Lisa and I
being four years older. I would be twelve, closer to thirteen and Lisa would be
sixteen; Cindy would be fourteen. It didn't seem realistic to think that either
of them would still be changing me at that age. Certainly by then I would be
allowed to change myself, I hoped. Never did the thought cross my mind that I
may not even be wearing diapers by then. I had it set in my mind that my diaper-
wearing was to remain for a very long and indefinite time.
Lisa then left the room after she finished with her diapering me up again.
I went through the rest of the afternoon and the evening worrying over if she
would tell mom or dad that I did my own diaper change. I prepared myself for the
resulting confrontation in the event that she would tattle on me for it. I
expected her to do it because she was always trying to find ways to get me in
trouble.
It wasn't until three hours later that I had to at least find out. I
didn't want to ask Lisa directly if she told mom or dad. This would only
suggestively prompt her to tell them, so if I could avoid trouble and keep my
mouth shut, I would.
Mom was in the living room reading a magazine. Lisa and Cindy were both in
their bedroom and dad was out back chopping firewood. I nervously prepared to
ask mom the question that had been eating away at me all day.
"Mom?" I started.
"I was wondering, if, uh, if I'll ever change my own diapers."
"Why? Why do you ask?" From mom's reaction, it was very dubious as to
whether or not Lisa told her.
"Because Lisa said that she would still be changing me when I was twelve."
"It's hard to say, Chris. That's only four years from now, so she might
still be doing it then."
*Only* four years from now? Now I knew for sure that this would not end
anytime soon, until mom continued on and said "Unless you've learned by then
that you want to be a big boy and not wear diapers anymore."
It seemed more certain that Lisa hadn't yet told her, but I was still too
unsure.
"But will I at least get to change them myself? Even if I'm fourteen?"
"Fourteen, Chris? Fourteen? It sounds like you expect to still be wearing
diapers by then so I don't think you'll ever want to be a big boy. If Lisa and
Cindy ever decide you can do it on your own, then it's up to them, but for now,
I think they'll still be changing you for awhile."
I still didn't know for sure whether mom or dad had been told, but if they
were told, at least I wasn't getting punished for it. The rest of the evening
went on as usual. As we sat at the dinner table I kept waiting for Lisa, or
maybe Cindy, to blurt out the big secret, that I changed my own diapers. I tried
to stop worrying about the matter. I just hoped that Lisa wasn't waiting for the
right moment to spring it on mom and dad, now that they were seated at the
kitchen table with the rest of the family. Every few seconds I looked nervously
at Lisa, expecting her to tell mom and dad. It was enough to elicit her
immediate attention.
"What, Chris?" she said.
"Nothing, Lisa."
"Why do you keep looking at me? Did my face turn all purple and green or
something?"
"No. Your face looks fine."
"Then eat your dinner; you're making *me* feel nervous."
I finally arrived at a reasonably safe conclusion that nothing was ever
said and decided to quit worrying about it. Why did it matter so much if mom and
dad did know, anyway? First, I'd probably get spanked hard for starters, then
some extra measures would have been taken to ensure that I would never change my
own diapers when visiting Tony's. Perhaps I would have never been allowed to go
to Tony's again, so there were some potentially grave consequences that would
have resulted if mom and dad ever knew that I changed my own diaper.
I spent the rest of the evening playing around on the Nintendo game and
doing other various activities. Shortly before going to bed I sat by the front
window and watched the snow fall as another winter storm was passing through.
Watching each flake dance its way past the street light on its descent to the
ground helped me to relax and take my mind off of what would happen if I were
punished for changing my own diaper. I had my diaper changed once more, this
time by Cindy, before going to bed. Apparently Lisa had told Cindy about how I
changed my own diaper when she said "so you got to change yourself at Tony's."
"Yeah, I did. Lisa must have told you."
"She did. She said you didn't wipe your butt clean enough and that's how
she knew."
My concerns over having mom and dad find out resurfaced. Without
hesitation I asked Cindy "do mom and dad know?"
"Not unless Lisa told them."
"I don't think she did. Please don't tell them, okay?"
"Okay, not that I was going to, anyway, Chris. I figured you'd try it
yourself one of these times when you got the chance. Just remember that you're
not supposed to change yourself."
"Yeah, I know, that's why I don't want mom and dad finding out."
Cindy finished diapering me. I kissed mom and dad goodnight and then went
straight to bed. Not surprisingly, I had a dream that night in which Lisa and
Cindy were told not to change me anymore. Mom was going off saying that I was
able to do it myself. Perhaps someday this dream would come true.
DIAPER DESIRES: PART 25
-----------------------
SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 26, 1989
As usual I was the first one to be up. The first thing I liked to do upon
getting out of bed on Sunday morning was to read the comics, but I had to wait
until someone else was up to retrieve the paper. After last night's snow it was
much too cold for me to run out to grab the paper in just my diapers. Instead I
waited for my parents or one of the girls to get up. While waiting I turned on
the TV. Even with cable there was nothing worth watching on Sunday morning.
Instead I put in a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles video and watched it.
About thirty minutes later Cindy was up.
"Good morning, Chris," she greeted me groggily, rubbing her eyes and
yawning.
"Good morning, Cindy."
Cindy sat next to me on the couch, watching the video with me. About ten
minutes later she asked, "did you get the comics yet?"
"No, it's too cold to go out there, at least for me. Can you go get it?"
"You want me to get it?"
"If you could. At least you have pajamas on."
"I don't want anyone to see me in my pajamas," she said.
"Look at me, Cindy! I'm in diapers and a shirt! No pajamas at all! I've
gone out there in my underwear! I've even gone out there in my diapers! What
would you do if you had to wear diapers?"
"I wouldn't," Cindy replied.
"You wouldn't what?"
"Wear diapers! I don't poop my pants like you do!"
"Never mind," I said. "Wait until mm and dad are up."
By 10:00 everyone was awake and dad had since then retrieved the paper.
While Lisa was reading the comics, Lisa was reading the news itself, and I was
going through the ads and looking for more toys I wanted for Christmas, making a
list as I went along. Just as I was about to read the comics Cindy told me to
get in my room for my diaper change.
I usually didn't say anything at all during a diaper change, let alone
start a dialog, but as I was lying there getting cleaned up from the wet diaper
I had on, I asked Cindy a question about Gina, her best friend, who hadn't been
over in about a month. I know that since I started wearing diapers she hadn't
been here to see me wearing them. It wasn't such a big deal anymore for someone
to come over and see me wearing diapers, although I didn't want the whole
neighborhood to stop by to see me. I figured that Gina would eventually be back
over again and sure enough, she'd see me wearing diapers.
"Is Gina still around?" I asked Cindy.
"Yeah, I see her at school, but her mother grounded her for bad grades, so
she hasn't been able to come over. I was thinking of calling to see if maybe her
mom will let her leave."
While I didn't think of my sisters' friends as my friends, Gina was nicer
to me than Lisa's friend Betty was. I knew Gina enough that she probably
wouldn't make such a big deal out of me wearing diapers like Betty did. But
then, how many boys my age wore diapers? Just as everyone else was surprised
when they first saw me in diapers, I expected Gina to do the same.
Later in the day Cindy told me that Gina wouldn't be over today, but she
would be over Saturday afternoon and help Cindy with putting up the Christmas
tree. At least I knew that she was coming over ahead of time, and besides, it
really didn't matter so much to me anymore if any of my sisters' friends stopped
by and saw me in diapers. Betty and Gina were the only ones who ever visited
regularly.
Dad always liked to put up the Christmas lights over the weekend following
Thanksgiving, and as always, he recruited me to assist him. He asked Cindy if I
had just been changed so that I wouldn't have to come back in the house for at
least a couple hours while we strung up the lights. He had her get my pants so
that I could go outside and help dad.
Mom had bought me a new pair of pants to replace the ones that were torn
over at my grandparents' place. They looked like they were stronger, if not at
least more fashionable. They didn't do well in the cold, however as my legs were
freezing from the blustery cold wind that was blowing as I unraveled several
strands of Christmas lights and strung them through the shrubbery around the
yard.
I had only been outside for an hour, hour and a half when I needed to pee.
I drank two steaming cups of hot cocoa before I went out to help with the lights
and they had quickly caught up with me. I just stood there and let it dribble
out. Then, as if nothing happened, I continued with putting up lights through
the trees and along the short fence that divided our property from the
neighbors.
It wasn't long before the wetness in the diaper had become very cold and
uncomfortable. My own body heat wasn't enough to retain warmth, even under two
thick diapers. I went in the house and asked for a change. Dad also decided to
take a break at that time.
After a diaper change and a hot bowl of soup for lunch, I was back outside
helping dad finish off the last of the lights. It was starting to turn dark by
the time we finished, and a light snow flurry began to fall. We got the lights
turned on, glowing brightly as the first house on the street to have Christmas
lights up, as we usually were. I had a hot bath that evening before going to
bed. The four days I had away from school were now over.
MONDAY, NOVEMBER 27, 1989
Back to school. Everyone seemed to be excited about the Christmas holiday
coming up, but other than that it was a normal week. Every morning mom rushed us
to get us off to school on time. Cindy was now changing my diapers faster now
that she had been doing it regularly for almost a month now, but she still had a
tendency to dawdle in the morning, so she wasn't getting out the door any
faster.
By this time everyone and everything had adjusted to the fact that I was
wearing diapers. The morning routine was always the same. The whole school knew
that I wore diapers, and of course some of the kids had to get in their licks to
tell me about it. Megan and Tracy were still on Tony and I, making remarks and
wisecracks, asking us if we needed a change, things like that. They even asked
me if I used up more diapers after I ate on Thanksgiving. I tried to ignore them
as they kept saying things like "I betcha he really pooped his diapers after
eating all that turkey!" They were right on that one, but then, I always "really
pooped" my diapers.
TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 28, 1989
Tuesday was not much of an eventful day. Tracy was absent, but Megan was
still there. She didn't say a word to me that day. Even at recess she minded her
own business. She was completely different without having her friend Tracy
around her. It was as if the only reason she made fun of me was because she was
with Tracy and it was no fun to tease me unless the two were together. Even at
the risk of getting Megan's unwanted attention, I looked at her in the
classroom. She just looked at me and then returned her attention to Mrs. Buxley.
I even went so far as to say "hi" to her as class was dismissed for the
day. She just said "hi, Chris." Odd, it seemed that she didn't jump at an
opportunity to tease me. Then I asked "where's Tracy?"
"She's sick today."
That was all she said before she slipped her coat on and walked out the
door towards the buses. I went through the day, feeling confused over her
changed character in the absence of Tracy. I talked to Tony about it on the bus.
"Did you notice Megan didn't talk to us today?" I asked Tony.
"No I didn't, but, you're right, she hasn't."
"Tracy was sick. I even talked to Megan. I think they just say those
things to us because they're best friends and when they aren't together it isn't
as much fun."
"You're probably right, Chris," Tony replied. Then he asked me, "why, do
you like Megan or something?" He was chuckling.
I gave Tony a friendly jab in the arm. "Nooo! Are you crazy, Tony?"
Actually-- and I didn't want to tell Tony this-- I did think Megan was
kind of cute, even if she did like to make fun of me for wearing diapers. She
had red, straight, shoulder-length hair. Her face had freckles and she was a
little chubby. Her butt always stuck out, but then, so did mine, but for a
different reason.
WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 29, 1989
There must have been a flu bug going around this week. I got on the bus,
expecting to see Tony, but he wasn't there in the seat he usually occupied. I
sat down in the seat by myself and looked around. No Tony. Either he missed the
bus this morning or he was sick. I took a peek into his classroom before I went
to my own class to see if he was there. No sign of him. I figured that he was
probably sick.
I got into my class and discovered that not only was Tracy absent again,
but so was Megan. In fact, five students were marked absent in Mrs. Buxley's
class. When we left class for recess I looked for Tony and he wasn't where we
usually met. I now knew for sure that he wasn't in school today. It made for a
long, boring recess. I stood against the building the whole time, shielding
myself from the cold wind.
After my lunchtime diaper change I headed to the lunchroom and sat in
solitude as I opened up my lunch bag and pulled out my sandwich. As I started
eating I looked over at the next table and saw Mark Stillwood sitting by
himself. I knew that he didn't have many friends-- perhaps none at all. I also
knew that he was a diaper wearer himself, so I knew that he wouldn't make fun of
me if I sat down and talked to him.
I picked up my sandwich with one bite out of it and slipped it back into
it's bag. I repacked my lunch and took my seat across from Mark.
"Hi," I said.
He looked up shyly and said "hi, who are you?"
"I'm Chris. I'm in Mrs. Buxley's class."
"What do you want?" he asked. Not only was the boy reserved in his ways,
he also didn't trust anyone who approached him which was why he had few friends.
"I just want to sit down with you, talk to you. You seem like a neat kid."
"Okay, you can sit here," he said. "I'm Mark, Mark Stillwood."
"I see you around the playground sometimes, by yourself. Do any of your
friends walk around with you?"
"Nooo," he said in a hushed voice. "I don't have any friends."
"What about me? I think you're a friend," I said to him.
"Do you like me?" he asked me.
"Of course, I think you're nice. There's a lot of kids I don't like
because they're all mean."
"They're all mean to me, so I don't talk to them. You're nice," he added,
"you're not mean."
"So does that mean we're friends?" I asked.
"Uh, huh," he said. I extended my hand and he extended his; we shook on
the friendship.
After the ice was broken we got to talking about things like hobbies,
things we did in our classes, our families. I asked him about Thanksgiving.
"We had turkey and mashed potatoes," he started, "just me and my mom."
He didn't really have much of a family to talk about. He only mentioned
his mom and never mentioned any brothers or sisters or grandparents. No wonder
the poor kid was so lonely! He hardly had a family, let alone friends! I was
really feeling some sympathy towards him. I began to wonder how his having to
wear diapers made him feel. I wanted to know what his circumstances were for
wearing diapers, but I didn't think it was appropriate to ask him about them. I
was probably the first kid he ever talked to, and I knew that if I mentioned
anything about diapers, he probably would have shied away from me and never talk
to anyone again. I felt like I was the only one he trusted, and I wasn't going
to blow what could be his first friendship with anybody.
I walked around the playground with him on lunch, much in the same way I
did with Tony. I knew that he was shy and I didn't expect him to say much, but I
made an effort to keep a dialog of some sort going.
"Do you like video games?" I asked him.
"Uh, huh," he mumbled.
"What are your favorite games?"
"I like Pac-Man, and Asteroids, and Frogger, and Centipede, , and Missile
Command...those are my favorite ones."
We used to have some of these games when we had an Atari game system.
"What kind of game system do you have?" I asked.
"An Atari, it's really old."
"We have a Nintendo". I wasn't trying to go one-up on Mark , I was just
keep the conversation alive. Actually, I wish that mom had kept the Atari since
I missed playing some of the older games that went with it.
"My mom can't get a Nintendo because she says they cost a lot of money,"
Mark added.
I could tell that the kid was poor, at least not as well off as my family,
which is not to say that we lived in the lap of luxury ourselves. At the same
time, I felt glad to live in a comfortable home with married parents. I presumed
that Mark's dad was either divorced or had possibly passed away. This was a
sensitive issue as well and in light of that, I refrained from bringing it up.
Mark really didn't have much to say, so I started saying things like "what
do you think of all the snow?". It was harder for me to talk to him than it was
to Tony. I knew Tony and I knew what he and I could talk about.
Just as the bell rang, I asked him to meet me for afternoon recess. He
said "okay" and then shyly walked away towards his class. Meanwhile, as Mrs.
Buxley droned on talking about subjects and verbs and stuff like that, I thought
more and more about various things that typically dominate an eight-year-old's
mind, mainly video games, MAD magazines, TV shows and cartoons, and, for this
time of year, what toys I wanted to get for Christmas.
I also thought about getting to know Mark well enough that I could talk
about diaper-wearing with him. I figured that his mom changed him at home since
she was the only one that he lived with, at least from what he had told me, but
I wanted to know more. I understood that it was a very private matter and I
would probably be just as reticent in discussing the matter with somebody I
didn't know well, but knowing that he and I had this one thing in common--
diaper wearing-- I knew that if the topic ever came up, that I could feel at
ease telling him about why I wear diapers and what I go through each day.
Hopefully he would open up and tell me how he feels about wearing diapers, but I
never would try to coerce him into discussing it if he didn't feel comfortable
about it.
When the afternoon recess came around, I went right to where I usually
caught up with Tony, where I arranged to meet Mark. He wasn't there, so I stood
there and waited. I began to wonder where he was. I was thinking that maybe he
forgot, or he was too shy to approach somebody who was waiting for him. Perhaps
he still didn't trust me and didn't think I was really being friendly. About
halfway into recess I saw him walking out from the building.
"Hey Mark!" I shouted. He stood still as I walked towards him.
"I had to go see the nurse," he told me. I didn't even ask him where he
was; he volunteered the information. It was really a big surprise that he said
that since I had a good idea what his visit to the nurse involved. I was hoping
that he would say something to the effect of "I needed my diaper changed," but
he told me nothing more beyond having to see the nurse.
We spent the remaining five minutes of recess talking about the old Atari
games. He had really gotten me interested in the subject since he mentioned
having one. I enjoyed playing our Nintendo, too, but I was starting to wish more
and more that we could also have our old Atari back. The bell rang and it was
back to class. "See you tomorrow," I said as we parted ways and returned to our
classes.
I had a big bowel movement on the bus coming home that day. I was sitting
in my seat alone, and there weren't as many kids on the bus as usual, another
sign that a lot of kids were sick. Cindy rode the bus home with her friend Gina
and was planning to spend the afternoon with her. As I was afforded a relatively
higher degree of isolation, I decided to just let it rip and flow freely into my
diaper. I knew that it would get changed fairly soon anyway.
As Lisa pulled off my soiled diaper she said "boy, you really loaded this
one! Wheeeyew!" Quickly she got me cleaned up and re-diapered. "I got lots of
homework tonight," she continued, "so if you need a change, get Cindy to change
you! Betty's coming over and we don't want to be disturbed?"
Homework? Since when did these two girls ever do *homework* together? And
actually get anything done? Ha!
I felt like being a brat, so I said "you mean, you two have *boys* to talk
about!"
"I outta spank your butt for that remark, Chris! I would if it weren't for
those *BIG, THICK, **DIAPERS** THAT ARE CONSTANTLY ON YOUR BUTT!"
Lisa wasn't done with me. Just as I started to get up she said "we're not
done, Chris!"
She told me to lie back down. She pulled off the plastic pants. I started
to get up when I thought she was going to remove the diapers and try to spank
me. Instead she got out another diaper and held it in front of me.
"Just for that little remark, I'm triple-diapering you! Now lift your butt
up before I decide to spank it anyway!" I could tell that she was feeling
resentful towards me for my brattiness, but at the same time I could tell she
was getting some gratification from putting me in three diapers.
"Now you won't need to be changed for a long time! Betty and I can do our
*homework* without being interrupted by my poopy-butt brother when he needs his
DIAPERS changed!"
She was struggling to get the third diaper fastened. The bulk of the first
two diapers was too much to allow the third one to fit. "Oh well, the plastic
pants will hold it in place!" Lisa said as she conceded from her efforts to
fasten the third diaper. The plastic pants were also a tight fit, but with some
effort she still got them to fit over the enormously thick set of diapers.
"Just wait until Betty sees how you look in THREE diapers!" Lisa said as
she left the room. I just lay there on the pad with my legs spread wide open,
thinking about what I would do this afternoon. A couple minutes later I got up
and waddled out to the kitchen to grab an afternoon snack.
DIAPER DESIRES: PART 26
-----------------------
As I entered the kitchen mom was standing there preparing this evening's
dinner. I didn't know what mom would say when she saw me wearing three diapers.
I expected mom to yell at Lisa and tell her to take the extra diaper off.
Instead, mom just asked me why I was wearing my diapers thicker.
"Lisa didn't want to change me while she was doing her homework with
Betty, so she put three diapers on me."
I stood there for moment, expecting mom to either tell Lisa to come out
and take the extra diaper off of me, or for mom to take it off. If I was lucky,
maybe I'd get to actually handle my own diapers and do it myself. That would be
a switch. Actually, I didn't want the third diaper off as I enjoyed it's
extremely bulky feeling, just that it made walking to be very difficult.
Mom looked at me and asked "are you okay in three diapers, or do you need
to have it taken off?" Note the passive voice, which implied that I wouldn't
have been allowed to do it if I wanted to.
"Uh, I'm okay," I said.
"You're going to have a hard time walking around in those, Chris, but if
it doesn't bother you, then we'll just leave you that way."
That sounded like it was a last call for me to tell her if I didn't want
to wear three diapers. Saying nothing, I ended up spending the rest of the
evening in three diapers. I probably could have asked to have the last one taken
off at any time, but I was handling it okay. I just limited the amount of
walking around I did.
While I was seated at the kitchen table having an afternoon snack Betty
showed up at the door. Mom let her in.
"Hi Brenda, hi Chris," she greeted us. "Where's Lisa?" she asked.
"She's in her room, go on back," mom replied.
Of course they didn't jump right into the homework that they had arranged
to do. They went to the kitchen and grabbed snacks of their own and sat at the
table. Just then I was done eating and proceeded to get up.
"Why are you getting up, Chris?" asked Betty. "Don't you like us?"
"I'm done eating," I said.
"You're welcome to stay and sit with us," Lisa said.
"Yeah, we don't bite," Betty added.
They were just trying to get me, so I just got up.
"Look at him waddle, Betty!" Lisa snickered. "I put three diapers on him!"
"I see that! Poor kid can barely walk!"
"I just didn't want to bother with changing him for awhile. We got that
big assignment to do and I didn't want to be interrupted."
"I'll change him if he needs it," Betty offered. "I haven't gotten to
change him in awhile!"
"Well, if he *really, really* needs to get changed, then you can," Lisa
said, "but I think he'll be okay for awhile!"
I walked back out to the living room. Feeling a bit chilled I sat down in
front of the heat to warm myself up. Ten minutes later the girls walked back to
their bedroom. "See ya' diaper-butt!" Betty giggled. "I haven't called him that
in awhile!"
Gina's mom dropped off Cindy at about 6:00. Gina also came in for a
moment, most likely to see what I looked like wearing diapers. I was sure that
Cindy had told her all about it and she just had to see me in diapers.
"Hi there, Chris," she said, looking at me as I sat there on the couch,
unable to close my legs to conceal the diapers bulging from my crotch. She
looked at Cindy and giggled.
"I'm sorry, Chris," she apologized as she put her arm around me. "I just
don't see very many boys your age still in diapers, but it's okay, there's
nothing wrong with wearing diapers. You look cute in them!"
There was that damn word "cute" again! There aren't too many synonyms for
"cute," so it was about the only word that ever got used. I had to admit that it
was better than being insulted for wearing them.
Gina stayed for a couple minutes and then had to get going when her mother
started honking the horn. "I'll see you at school tomorrow," she said upon
leaving. Mom had dinner ready shortly afterwards. Betty was still there and
joined us at the table.
I was still wearing the same three thick diapers that Lisa put on me
earlier and yes, they were wet. It wasn't until bed- time before they were
changed by Cindy. She had a hard time getting the plastic pants to come off
since they were so tight over the three diapers.
"Why did Lisa put you in three diapers?" she asked. "Your plastic pants
are harder to take off."
"She did it so she wouldn't have to change me while she and Betty were
doing their homework! They goofed off all afternoon and probably spent an hour
at the most on homework!"
"I see," Cindy said. She took off the three diapers and got me cleaned up
and powdered. She only put the usual two diapers on me. While I wouldn't have
minded wearing three again, it was nice to at least walk more easily, not that
walking with two diapers on was much easier, I just didn't waddle as much.
THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 30, 1989
Tony was back in school that morning. I sat down with him on the bus as I
did every morning.
"So where were you yesterday?"
"I was sick, and I feel like I should've stayed home today, but mom
doesn't like me to miss school."
"Everybody's sick," I said. "There were five kids gone from Mrs. Buxley's
class. Megan and Tracy were both sick, too."
Amazingly, I had never missed a day of school to this point. I managed to
attend class every day from kindergarten through first and second grades, and I
was still going strong into the first quarter of the third grade. I didn't know
what it was like to miss school.
"So what did you do all day?" I asked Tony.
"I lay in bed mostly. I got feeling better and played some Nintendo games
later on."
"So you had fun yesterday?" I asked.
"Fun? I threw up twice and I had diarrhea!"
"Good thing you had diapers on, huh?" I added.
"I would have ended up pooping in my pants if I didn't have diapers on
instead. My mom changed my diapers for me."
Maybe spending a day at home in bed in diapers wasn't such a bad thing, I
thought. I already knew how nice it was to stay in bed and pee and poop in a
diaper instead of having to get up and go to the toilet, but getting to just lie
there all day and have your mom take care of you, as if you were truly a baby,
came to me as an appealing thought. Throwing up, on the other hand, wouldn't
have been so fun.
I got to class and discovered that Megan was still absent but Tracy was
back. The classroom was still notably sparse in its occupancy. I began to wonder
if everybody was at home with the same illness that Tony had. All these other
kids probably had to try to run to the bathroom whenever they had diarrhea. They
couldn't just stay in bed with diapers on and let it go right there. Tony and I,
should I ever get sick, had it pretty good with wearing diapers.
At recess I met with Tony. I looked around for Mark but I never saw him.
For all I knew he may have been sick, too.
"What did you do yesterday?" Tony asked me.
"Not much. I talked to that Mark kid."
"Mark?" he asked. "You mean Mark Stillwood?"
"Yeah. I sat down with him at lunch and then we walked around the
playground."
"He's only a first-grader, you know," Tony said.
"He doesn't have any friends, except me, and you if he likes you."
"You mean he actually talked to you?" Tony asked me. "I've never heard him
talk."
"Because he never has anyone to talk to. I just sat down and said 'hi.'"
"There he is," Tony said.
"Mark!" I yelled. "Over here!"
He started walking towards us. He quietly said "hi".
"Hi, I'm Tony," Tony introduced.
"I'm Mark, Mark Stillwood," he said.
We spent the latter half of the recess on the swings. Just as the bell
rang, Tony told Mark a joke and Mark actually laughed. It was a silly, stupid
joke that would have only been funny to a first-grader, but it made Mark laugh,
which was an improvement, I felt. We all agreed to meet at the same table for
lunch after visiting the nurse for our diaper changes.
As lunchtime rolled around I went straight for the nurse's office for a
diaper change. I had messed them quite nicely during the math lesson. I didn't
see Tony nor Mark, so they were either on their way, or perhaps they had already
gotten changed.
They were both sitting at the table by the time I got there. Tony looked a
little pale in the face still. He had only eaten about half of his sandwich when
he offered the rest of it to me. It was a bologna sandwich with mayonnaise, and
I didn't like mayonnaise, so he offered it to Mark, who gladly accepted. Either
Mark was hungry, or he was just glad to have something offered to him.
We went back out to the swings, which looked like would be- come our
regular "hangout" on the playground. "I like the swings," Mark said. "I think
they're fun."
About ten minutes later one of the kids came walking by.
"Hey! There's diaper-boy! It looks like he found a friend!"
Mark immediately skidded to a stop, hopped off of the swings and started
running away, crying. The kid, whoever he was, walked off laughing maliciously.
"Mark! Wait! Come here!" I shouted. Mark was long gone, out of sight.
"What's wrong with him?". Tony asked.
"Mark is really shy and that kid probably scared him off."
The bullying kid had come back towards Tony and I and confronted us.
"Hey, diaper-boy! You hangin' out with first-graders?" he said, staring me
right in the eye.
"I'm a third-grader," said Tony.
"Shut up, punk! Was I talking to you?" he said to Tony, poking him in the
chest. Tony immediately ran off.
This kid looked like he was going to be trouble. He was just like Sean,
only younger, In fact, he looked like he was a third grader himself. I had never
seen him before but I had already made up my mind what to think of him.
"Look, kid, anyone who wears diapers is a *baby* around here! Babies can't
come to school! So get out of here!"
"I can't, I have to be here!"
"Not if I have it my way, diaper-boy!"
Just then Tony returned with a teacher, Mr. Lawrence, again.
"What's the trouble?" he asked sternly. Mr. Lawrence was a big, burly man
who was usually on lunch hour duty and, with his size, commanded the respect of
many students.
"This kid's pickin' on me!" I sobbed.
"Alright, Travis, this is twice this week you've been a troublemaker!
Looks like you'll get to know Mr. Jenkins on a first name basis! Let's go meet
Ed, shall we?"
Travis, who had taken over Sean's spot as my worst enemy, was dragged off
to see Mr. Jenkins, or, in Travis' case, "Ed".
"Travis," I mumbled. "That kid was ugly and he had really bad breath and
his teeth were crooked!" I told Tony. "I hope he gets kicked out of school,
too!"
After lunch, I went back into class and endured another dull grammar
lesson, followed by spelling, which at least held my interest as Mrs. Buxley had
us play games based on spelling exercises. This helped to pass the afternoon
more quickly.
On the afternoon recess Tony and I saw Mark standing in the corner by his
classroom. We walked over to him. He started to shy away from us.
"Mark! It's okay," we said as we approached him.
"That kid called me 'diaper-boy'!" Mark said.
"He didn't call *you* 'diaper-boy'," I clarified. "He called *me* a
'diaper-boy'!"
"You? I thought he called me a 'diaper-boy' because..."
He dropped his voice to a low whisper.
"...because I have to wear diapers."
"Guess what, Mark?" I started. I turned around and lifted my coat and my
shirt. "I showed him the top of my diaper that was showing above my pants.
"You wear diapers, too?" he asked me in astonishment.
"Uh, huh," I replied. I looked around and noticed that a lot of kids were
gathering in a group nearby and several others were running around us.
"Let's go to the far corner," I suggested.
When we got over there, Tony lifted up his coat and shirt and revealed
that he, too, wore diapers.
"I thought that you'd like to know that some of us third- graders wear
them, too," I consoled him. "I betcha there's kids in the sixth grade who wear
them. Maybe not at our school, but somewhere there probably is."
"Why do you guys wear them?" he asked.
"My mom and dad make we wear them," I explained. "I like to wear them at
home but I wish I didn't have to come to school in them."
"My mom lets me wear them," Tony added.
"I went to the doctor," Mark started, "and he said that I can't go to the
bathroom and if I do then I get my pants all wet and I have to wear diapers. I
was gonna take medicine for it but my mom said it was too expensive so she makes
me wear diapers instead."
Loosely translated, he meant that he wasn't able to hold it long enough to
be able to use a toilet, so the doctor prescribed that he wear diapers instead.
"Did you have to go to the doctor?" he asked me.
"No, my mom just started putting diapers on me and now my sisters do it
most of the time."
"You have sisters?" he asked.
"Two of them. What about you? Do you have any sisters or brothers?"
"Uh huh. Kind of"
This surprised me. "What do you mean?"
"I sort of have a sister," Mark explained. "Mom says that my dad isn't her
dad so my sister isn't really my sister."
I didn't quite understand this at eight years of age, when the only man I
recognized as my dad, was, in fact, my father since he was married to my mother.
"You mean you have two dads?" I asked, feeling perplexed.
"My mom doesn't know who my sister's dad is."
This still didn't make sense to me, so I changed the subject. For the sake
of simplicity I referred to his half- sister as just a sister.
"Does she have to wear diapers, too?" I asked.
"No, but she has to change me sometimes."
"How old is she?" I asked.
"She's twelve ,she's in seventh grade."
"I have a sister in the seventh grade!" I exclaimed. "What's her name?"
"Sheila."
"I'll ask my sister if she knows your sister."
Tony, who had been standing there quietly said "I have a sister, but she's
only six and she's still in kindergarten."
By then the bell had rung. I felt good that I could discuss the topic of
diapers more openly with Mark, although little was actually said about wearing
diapers. I now knew that he had to wear them for medical reasons. I still wanted
to know if he had to poop in them since he only mentioned wetting. I also wanted
to know how his sister acted when she had to change his diapers. I decided to
ask Lisa if she knew anyone with the name of Sheila at her school.
DIAPER DESIRES: PART 27
-----------------------
As I got home from school that afternoon, Lisa immediately proceeded to
diaper me. "I'm gonna make you wear three diapers again," she said.
"Why?"
"Just because I feel like it. I just like to know that my brother is well-
taken care of. I also want to see how long you can go around in three diapers."
Once again I fell to submission and allowed her to triple- diaper me.
"Do you know any Sheila's at school?" I asked Lisa.
"Yeah, I know three of them. Let's see, there's Sheila Young, Sheila
Mitchell and Sheila Martin."
"What about a Sheila Stillwood?"
"Nope, don't know her. Why do you ask?"
"I met a kid at school yesterday and he said he had a sister in the
seventh grade, so I thought that maybe you knew her."
"Who's this new friend of yours?"
"His name is Mark Stillwood. He's in the first grade."
"You're making friends with first-graders now! Those diapers must have a
regressive effect on you!"
"What's regressive mean?" I asked.
"It means you're acting more and more like a baby instead of growing up
like the rest of us! Why are you hanging out with first-graders anyway?"
"He looked like he needed a friend, so I sat down with him at lunch
yesterday and started talking to him. That's how you make friends, right?"
"Next you'll be sneaking over to the kindergarten and making friends with
them!"
The rest of the afternoon passed without much of anything significant
happening. I did well to wet and soil the triple- thick diapers, however. Lisa
changed me again that night.
"Looks like these tripled diapers are just the thing for you, Chris! I
think I'll just keep you in them from now on!"
This was the first time I had slept in three diapers, and it took some
getting used to lying in bed with the added thickness around me. After rolling
around, having to keep my legs apart, I fell asleep.
FRIDAY, DECEMBER 1, 1989
We had a substitute teacher today. It appears that Mrs. Buxley herself was
stricken with the illness that was going around. Megan and Tracy were both
present, and they took advantage of Mrs. Buxley's absence. They were handing me
notes with silly drawings of "me" getting changed by "them". I didn't want to
keep it, but at the same time I didn't want to draw attention to it by wrinkling
it up and tossing it in the trash.
The substitute teacher was more lax with the class than Mrs. Buxley ever
was. But she wasn't as lax as Megan and Tracy were hoping. After recess, Tracy
switched seats with another girl, hoping the teacher wouldn't notice, so that
the two could sit next to each other.
"Excuse me, miss," the teacher said to Tracy, "but I think there was
someone else sitting there at the beginning of class. Can I have you two sit in
your assigned seats? Thank you."
I didn't even need a diaper change at lunch. Instead I went straight to
our table and waited for Tony and Mark to catch up. Afterwards we went out to
the corner of the play- ground. The weather was notably warmer, enough to melt
some of the snow. We trudged through the slush and went to our designated corner
where we could talk about the one thing we had in common, diapers.
"I had a big pee in my diaper before I got changed," Tony said. "What
about you, Chris?"
"I'm still dry."
"Why do you guys talk about diapers so much?" Mark asked us.
"We think kids should be allowed to wear them if they want to," Tony said.
"Why do parents toilet train anyway? If a kid wants to use diapers, his parents
shouldn't make him stop wearing them if he doesn't want to."
"I wish I didn't have to wear diapers," Mark said. "But it's better than
peeing in my pants. I think I'm the only one who has to wear diapers. You guys
don't *have* to wear them."
"I wish I did have to wear them," I said. "I mean, I wish my doctor told
me that I had to wear them."
"Why do you wish that?" Mark asked. "Do you wish you couldn't hold it when
you needed to pee?"
"Yeah, so I would get to wear diapers all the time! If my mom and dad
wanted, they could take away my diapers and make me go back to the toilet!"
"If they did, then what would you do, Chris?" Tony asked.
"I'd start pooping my pants again so I'd get them back."
"You guys really like to wear diapers, huh?" Mark said, almost laughing.
"I do, and my mom let's me," said Tony. "She lets me because she knows
it's what I wanted to wear, so she said, 'okay, Tony, I'll let you wear diapers
if you want to, but you have to change them and use them all the time.' My mom
feels that kids should be allowed to wear diapers if they want and she thinks
parents make such a big deal over it. I think my mom's right."
I never heard Tony make such an assertion. I agreed with him , and his
mom, and I always felt that parents treated the issue of toilet training so
seriously because that's what every- one wants their kids to be like. Why can't
some kids just be left in diapers if they would rather wear them. Tony and I
were fortunate enough to have parents who supported our desires to wear diapers,
especially Tony, since his mom arranged for him to wear them entirely on a
consensual basis. I was wearing diapers for punishment and was subjected to
other restrictions concerning my punishment.
Sometimes I went through mom's "Parents" magazines and look at the
articles on toilet training. I don't want mom to see what I'm reading, but she's
glad that I'm reading something and she's never questioned the fact that I like
to look at such a magazine, although she probably knows what I like to read and
look at.
Now that Tony had brought forth a thought that had sat latently in my
mind, my mind strayed for a moment as I thought about going through mom's
magazines and reading all the articles on toilet training. Every now and then
there would be an article on bedwetting, and I always liked to read these. I
hoped that Tony could stay over tonight so we could talk about this.
As I sat in class that afternoon I started writing down some thoughts. I
thought about things like parents getting mad at their kids for not getting
toilet trained and then putting them back in diapers indefinitely. I felt that I
had tapped into my potential creativity skills when I started getting these
ideas. I thought about Tony and I making a book on how kids should be allowed to
wear diapers. I had plenty of crayons and colored pencils to make drawings for
the book, and I had a lot of things I wanted to write. All afternoon I
brainstormed my ideas. I couldn't wait to get home this afternoon.
I told Tony about my idea on the bus.
"You know what I thought of, Tony?" I opened.
"What, Chris? What did you think of?"
"I thought about me and you making a book on wearing diapers. I hope you
can stay over tonight so we can work on it!"
"That sounds really fun, Chris! I'll ask my mom if I can stay over!"
I showed Tony the things I wrote in class. While leafing through my
notebook I saw the drawing that Megan and Tracy handed me earlier in the week.
"Did you draw this, Chris?" Tony asked.
"Uh, no. Megan and Tracy handed it to me in class."
"You like Megan, don't you, Chris?"
I had to 'fess up. "Well, I do think she's kinda cute."
"So why does she always draw you pictures and tease you about wearing
diapers? I think she likes you, Chris, I really do."
"If she liked me then she'd be nice and try to make friends and not tease
me all the time."
"Some people do that to tell you they like you," said Tony.
As I hopped off the bus, I reminded Tony to ask his mom about staying over
tonight. Excited about what we planned to do, I went straight to mom and asked
her if Tony could stay over.
"No, I think you need a weekend at home, Chris."
"What? But whhyyy?"
"You and Tony have stayed at each other's just about every weekend. Cindy
has Gina staying over tomorrow. Maybe next week, but I'd like you to have a
weekend home."
"Awww, mom! Please?"
"Tony, the answer is no. Now don't push it or the answer will be 'no' for
next week, too!"
"Can he come over tomorrow afternoon?"
"We're getting our Christmas tree tomorrow."
"But can he still come over, maybe go with us?"
"Chris, I think you need to have some time to yourself. We've been pretty
loose about letting you and Tony do things together, even though we wanted you
to be grounded completely."
"How about Sunday then?" I asked, pushing the issue even further.
Mom sighed, "we'll see how Sunday goes."
At least she didn't say no, so maybe Tony could come over then. My
excitement over tonight had waned as I was very disappointed over not having
Tony over tonight.
Just then the phone rang. It was Tony.
"I can't stay tonight," he moaned. "we have to go to this Christmas crafts
thing that mom wants to see. It's gonna be really boring. I went to it last
year."
"My mom said no, too. She thinks I need to have a weekend to myself. What
are you doing Sunday?"
"I dunno. Probably nothin'."
"Maybe we can do it then," I suggested. "I'll talk to you later, bye."
Lisa changed me, and of course she put me in three diapers like she had
decided to do. I knew that she originally started triple-diapering me to be
spiteful, but now I was getting used to it and I didn't complain. I was starting
to get used to the feel of three diapers, although I still had trouble walking.
Not unless my legs suddenly grew longer would I overcome the difficulty in
walking.
After dinner I began thinking about the project that Tony and I had
originally planned to work on. I got out some paper and drew a picture of
"myself" in a diaper. I tried to exaggerate the diaper's size and thickness, but
there was little more to exaggerate as I was already triple-diapered. I drew a
couple more pictures, most of them of "me" posing with my rear end prominently
bulging out.
I spent about an hour drawing various pictures. Some of them were better
than others. The best one I drew was with Lisa changing me. She had set all the
poopy diapers off to her side and was putting five diapers on me and saying
"since three diapers aren't enough I'm gonna put five of them on you!"
I let my imagination get carried away as I thought back on the previous
month and all the things that had happened in that time. I drew a lot of
pictures and decided to go back through them and color them, maybe add some
elements to the background, such as the things in my bedroom.
Mom came walking by and looked at me on the floor with my papers and my
crayons all strewn about.
"Now see, Chris?" mom said. "When you have this time to yourself it allows
you to be creative and do the things you like to do."
"Me and Tony were gonna do this together tonight."
"Well, you and Tony have plenty of time to do these things."
A few minutes later Lisa came walking by.
"What'cha workin' on, Chris?" she asked.
"Nothing," I said as I hunched forward and tried to cover up what I was
drawing as I didn't want anyone else to see these drawings.
"Nothing? No." She then picked up a blank sheet of paper.
"This, right here, is 'nothing'. Let's see what you're drawing there."
Lisa grabbed hold of the paper I was concealing from her view.
"These are nice drawings, Chris," she commented. "Looks like you're into
self-portraits here."
Lisa was holding the first one I drew, which showed me sitting on the
floor playing on the Nintendo with a big, thick diaper bulging outward from my
butt.
"I think I'll go hang this up on the refrigerator so when people stop by
they can see how good of an artist you are."
I couldn't tell if Lisa sincerely thought that I was good at drawing or if
she was just making a point of the fact that I depicted myself wearing diapers.
"Can I draw something else and let you hang it up instead?"
"You can, but I think this is a good enough drawing."
"But I'm wearing diapers in that one!"
"Of course! You're wearing diapers in all of them! Anyone who comes over
will see you in your diapers, anyway, so why should I not put this up?"
"These drawings are for me and Tony," I said. "We're making a book."
"A book?" she asked curiously. "So what is this book going to be about?"
Now I got her too interested in what I was doing.
"It's a book about me and Tony."
"What an idea, Chris! I should make one about Betty and I! Then we can
look at it when we're older and remember the things our friendship was all
about! Maybe I can look at yours for ideas!"
"Maybe, but it'll be awhile before we finish it."
This was one of those few times when Lisa and I got along. We weren't
fighting or calling each other names and she wasn't making wisecracks or remarks
about me wearing diapers.
Lisa then got up and left the room. I worked some more on my drawings for
about another hour, then decided to put my things away and move onto other
activities. I couldn't wait to show Tony what I had created.
SATURDAY, DECEMBER 2, 1989
It was about 11:00 this morning when my family and I headed out to select
a Christmas tree. Cindy had already changed my diapers and I was fully dressed
and ready to go. We spent about forty-five minutes, it seemed, looking over all
the trees at two different lots. Dad was always picky about what he considered
to be a good tree. He would look at each one until he found the one he liked and
hoping that the rest of us agreed. After awhile the rest of us just wanted dad
to find one he liked and leave it at that. None of us cared too much, just so
that dad was satisfied. It was a cold, blustery day, so none of us felt like
staying outside any longer than we had to.
After stopping at McDonald's for lunch we were back home. Dad got the tree
set up in the front window of our house, ready to be decorated. Of course I had
been returned to my usual way of being dressed, just a shirt and diapers.
Lisa had decided to leave for the afternoon to visit Betty. Dad spent much
of his day shoveling snow, stringing up a couple more sets of lights, and
working in his shop. I think dad just liked to watch the football game out there
in the his shop where he could get away from us kids and have some privacy. He
seemed to completely disappear in the mid-afternoon hours every Saturday during
the fall and winter, and football was usually the reason why.
Cindy called her friend Gina over to help with decorating the tree. While
mom and Cindy were busy dragging out boxes of ornaments and other decorations
for the house, I went back to my room and pulled out some of the pictures I drew
the night before. I felt like writing today. I looked at each picture I drew and
put a little story to it.
I started with the one of me playing the Nintendo. Underneath the drawing
I wrote the following:
This is me playing my Nintendo. I am sitting in front of
our TV because that is what we play the Nintendo on. I have
diapers on because my mom makes we wear diapers. I like to
wear diapers when I play games because if I have to go to
the bathroom I can just sit there and go in my diapers. My
sisters have to stop playing and get up and use the toilet.
My diapers are very big and thick so I can sit there and
play Nintendo all day and pee and poop a lot in my diapers.
Meanwhile, Gina arrived, and not by herself. She also had to bring along
her little brother Bryce. Cindy came to my bedroom door while my mind was deeply
entrenched in thinking of what to write with another one of my pictures.
"Gina's here," she said, "and her brother came with her since Gina's mom
is out Christmas shopping, so he'll have to play with you awhile."
Bryce had been over here before, but never to spend an afternoon at our
house to be babysat. He was a year younger than I, in the second grade. I hardly
ever saw him at school. He was kind of like Mark Stillwood, quiet and didn't say
a whole lot.
Bryce then entered the room and said "hi" as I greeted him in return.
Bryce looked at me for a moment, most likely noting the fact that I was in
diapers. He didn't seem to be terribly surprised by it. Either he already knew
about it from other kids at school or from what Gina may have told him.
He sat down next to me and asked me what I was doing.
"I'm writing stories about me and my best friend," I answered. I decided
that this probably didn't interest him, and I wasn't so eager to share it with
him since I hardly knew him, so I put my stuff away and asked him what he liked
to do. "So, uh, what do you like to do?" I asked him".
"I dunno. I like to play with cars," he replied.
"Cars? I've got tons of cars! Hot Wheels, Matchbox cars--you like those?"
"Yeah I do!" he exclaimed with sudden animation. I went to my closet and
pulled out my racing track and my collection of cars. He even helped me set it
up. "I have a track just like yours," he explained, "so I know how to put it
together." He suddenly opened up and was talking to me like he were my best
friend. He was a lot more open than Mark Stillwood, and the impression he made
on me afterwards was much different than the way I originally perceived him. He
was nothing like Mark as he turned out.
We spent awhile playing with my cars. In fact, Bryce wanted to keep
playing after I grew tired of it and wanted to move on to do some other
activity. After awhile I sat there and just watched him as he raced his car
around the track "solo". Finally he grew tired of it himself and started
disassembling the track. I got up to get myself a drink of soda. I offered Bryce
a soda, which he accepted.
As I headed back to my room Cindy asked "how are you and Bryce getting
along?"
"Fine! He loves my race cars!"
"I figured that," Gina added. "He plays with them all the time!"
When I got back to the room I noticed that Bryce had moved and was sitting
on my diaper-changing pad and was leaning his back up against my diaper drawers.
I don't know if he just decided to sit there, or if he was curious about my
diapers. He hadn't said anything to me about them yet. I handed him his pop. I
sat across from him as he and I talked some more.
DIAPER DESIRES: PART 28
-----------------------
I sat there with my legs spread widely open, exposing my diapers quite
prominently as I talked to Bryce about school. As he had the same second grade
teacher as I had, this gave us a great deal to talk about. He then paused for a
moment and looked up at me after seemingly having his eyes fixed on my diapers
bulging from my crotch.
"Can I ask you a question?" he asked cautiously.
"Yeah, you can," I answered.
"Why do you wear diapers?"
He seemed to be comfortable enough with the fact that I wore diapers and
he wasn't teasing me about it, so I felt more at ease with discussing it openly
with him.
"My mom makes me wear them," I started.
"Why?"
"Well, I was pooping in my underwear and..."
He started laughing. "You went poop in your underwear?"
I knew that he was amused, and perhaps amazed by what I did, but I knew he
wasn't laughing at me, just at what I had done. Even I started giggling a
little.
"Yeah, I just kept my underwear on whenever I needed to go the bathroom.
Sometimes I'd put on a few extra pairs so it would be more like wearing a
diaper. But then my mom found out and started making me wear diapers."
"Do you go poop in your diapers?" he asked.
"Yes, I do, and it's really messy and smelly." I knew this would get Bryce
laughing some more.
"I just pooped before you came over," I added.
"Are you going to change your diaper?" he asked.
"No, my sisters do that."
"Your SISTERS change you?" he asked with much astonishment. "Aren't you
afraid to let them see your..." He paused as he was probably a little
embarrassed to talk about such things.
"I was at first, but they do it every day, and they look at my poopy butt
more than anything else!" Bryce started laughing again.
"Can I try one on?" he asked with no hesitation.
"You mean, one of my diapers?"
"Yeah. I think they look fun to wear!"
"Okay, they're in the drawers behind you," I told him.
He wasn't modest about taking his pants off in front of me. He just undid
them and stripped to his underpants. His underpants were printed with little red
race cars all over them, which was no surprise given his level of interest in
race cars.
"Do I have to take my underwear off first?" he asked.
"Are you going to just wear the diaper, or use it, too?" I asked.
"I just wanna try one on, and then take it back off," he said.
He left his underwear on and put the diaper on over it. It was a little
large, but it still stayed on him. He fastened the sides and then walked around
the room. He even looked at himself in the mirror on the back of my door as he
shut it.
"I don't want your sister or my sister to see me wearing a diaper," he
said.
He then sat back down and asked me if he could look at my collection of
race cars. I went over to my closet and pulled them back out. I went through
each one and explained them the best I could.
"I got these two for my birthday," I explained as I showed him some of the
newer cars in my collection. "I left this one in the mud, so it's all beat up
and scratched. Oh, this is one I found at school! It was in the hallway when I
found it!"
A few minutes later I realized that Bryce was still wearing the diaper
that he was only going to "try on" at first, and then "take it back off".
"Uh, are you going to take that diaper off?" I asked.
"I wanna keep wearing it," he said. "I also want to put on those plastic
pants. Do you have some?"
I got up and grabbed for him a pair of my plastic pants. He slipped them
right on and then went back to looking at my collection of cars. His interest in
that waned as he turned to my Legos. He started building-- what else?-- race
cars with the pieces that I hadn't yet used for the town that I had constructed
in the corner of my room.
A few minutes later Cindy came to the room and asked me if I needed a
diaper change. I said "yes".
She then opened the door and came in, to see that not only was I wearing
diapers, of course, but so was Bryce! Bryce tried to close his legs to conceal
the diaper and plastic pants he had on, but the mere fact that his pants were
off was a dead giveaway.
"Gina! Come here!" Cindy shouted. Bryce ran for the closet to hide from
view.
As Gina entered the room, Cindy said "go see your brother; he's in the
closet!"
Gina then walked over to the closet and pulled apart the shirts that were
hanging up. On the floor was Bryce sitting there on his haunches with his
diapered crotch showing between his bare legs.
"What'cha hidin' for, Bryce?" she asked as she saw what he was wearing.
Bryce then knew that he was cornered and had no choice but to get up and
step back out of the closet.
"Those diapers a little big for you, you know," Gina said.
"I was just trying them on," he said.
"Oh? Well, since you've decided to try them on, why don't you go ahead and
use them?"
"Yeah," Cindy added. "We have a rule here, Bryce. The rule is that anybody
else who wears diapers here has to go by the same rules as Chris does!"
"What are Chris' rules?" Bryce asked.
"Chris has to wear only his diapers-- which you're already doing-- and he
has to use them. No toilets! Oh, and you can't change your own diaper."
Bryce just stood there frozen.
"Who's gonna change them?" he asked.
"Well, I could do it, or, let your sister do it if you prefer!"
"I'm taking them off right now!" Bryce shouted as he started to pull the
plastic pants down.
"Too late, Bryce, once you're in diapers around here, there's no turning
back!" Cindy said. Gina was standing next to her giggling.
"That's right, my little brother!" Gina said with a smirk.
"No! I was just trying them on!" he protested.
"Look, Bryce, if you don't stay in that diaper then I'll tell mom what you
did over here, and do you know what she'd say if she found out?"
"I'd get in lots of trouble," Bryce said as he relinquished his
resistance.
"So it's going to be a diaper then, huh?" she said.
"Uh huh."
Cindy then walked over to Bryce with the pins that had been used on me
earlier when mom found out that I had taken the diapers off at school one day.
"You know these pins are for?" Cindy asked Bryce as she showed them to
him. "Chris took his diapers off once, and we found out later that he did, so he
got the *pins!* Chris doesn't try taking his diapers off, anymore! Since *you*
tried to take your diapers off, *you're* getting the *pins* now!"
"What do you do with those?" he asked nervously.
"We go around you, and we take all these pins," Cindy said slowly to
emphasize her point, "and we stick them into your plastic pants, and then we
fasten them to your shirt so that you can't get your diaper off! Now just be a
good boy and sit still while we pin you up! Gina, why don't you do his rear, and
I'll do his front."
Cindy handed Gina about a dozen pins.
"Do I use all of these?" Gina asked Cindy.
"Yeah, use all of them! We wanna make sure that he keeps his diapers on!"
Bryce stood there feeling humiliated. He started crying.
"Oh, it's not that bad, Bryce," Gina comforted him. "You'll be out of them
in just a few hours...maybe."
I stood there and watched as Gina pinned the back side of his plastic
pants (actually, my plastic pants), and Cindy did the front. After they finished
up Cindy said "now let's get *you* taken care of, Chris. Get on the changing
pad."
Cindy then removed the plastic pants and the diapers. Gina stood there and
watched, observing everything that went on during a typical diaper change. She
pulled away the three diapers, revealing beneath them a big, sticky, smelly
mess.
"You put *three* diapers on him?" she asked.
"Of course! Why take chances?" Cindy said.
"I was wondering why Chris' diapers looked so much thicker. How many are
*you* wearing, Bryce?"
"Just one," he answered.
"Let's see about adding a couple of diapers!" she suggested.
"No," Cindy countered. "I don't want to have to take all those pins out
already! Let's see how he does with one diaper, then we'll diaper him a little
more heavily if he needs it!"
"Okay," Gina said.
"How long will it be?" Bryce asked.
"How long will what be?"
"How long do I have to wear diapers?"
"It'll be at least a couple hours before mom stops by," she said. "We'll
take you out of them then...if you're good-- heh, heh!"
Cindy then finished diapering me.
"What about the pins?" Gina suggested. "Shouldn't we put them on Chris?"
"Oh, Chris doesn't need them anymore; he's learned his lesson."
All of this surprised me from Gina. I mean, Gina had always been really
nice whenever she was over, but since this was a new opportunity for Cindy to
have some fun with diapering, and that Gina was there to join in on the fun, it
was only natural that Gina would act this way. They were both big sisters having
fun with diapering their little brothers.
"Come look at the Christmas tree, guys!" Cindy said as she got up from
changing me. We followed the two girls out to the front room and went up to the
tree.
"What do you think?" Cindy asked us.
"It looks nice," I said out of politeness, and it was decorated quite
nicely, I had to agree.
"Where's mom?" I asked.
"She went to get pizza for us. She should be back any minute.
It was about twenty minutes later when mom came through the door with the
pizzas and saw that now Bryce was in diapers.
"Now why is *he* in diapers?" mom asked.
"He wanted to try wearing them," Cindy explained. "So, we caught him
wearing them and now he has to stay in them."
"Oh, I see," mom replied. "Maybe all boys should just wear diapers, it
seems to be a trend that's starting to catch on, at least around here."
"Yeah, think of what that would mean!" Gina said. "They'd make the boys'
bathroom at school into another girls' bathroom, so only girls could go in
there! All the boys would have to go to school in their DIAPERS! Wouldn't that
be funny?"
"It would, wouldn't it?" Cindy laughed. "But then where would you guys all
change? They'd just take all the toilets out and turn the boys' bathroom into a
diaper-changing room!"
While the girls were having their fun with the idea of proposing that all
boys wear diapers, Bryce and I just sat there and listened. I wasn't laughing,
and neither was Bryce, but that's not to say I wasn't enjoying it.
As I sat there and ate my pizza I thought of this scenario over and over.
I thought of it to the point that I felt like writing a story about it. I
figured that it would make a good addition to the "book" that Tony and I were
planning to make.
A few minutes later Bryce leaned over to me and whispered something in my
ear. He said "I need to go to the bathroom."
I said, "well, you can't your diapers off, so..."
I could tell that Bryce didn't look too comfortable with being forced to
use them. It had been another ten minutes as he and I finished up the last of
the pizza. Cindy and Gina had since then gotten up and gone outside to play in
the snow.
"Did you go yet?" I asked.
"No, I can't," he said. "I still have my underpants on."
"Uh, oh...," I said. "You never took them off first; you were just gonna
try the diaper and take it back off, weren't you?"
"Uh, huh,," he said. "I'll have to go in my underwear, too!"
"Let's go play video games," I suggested. "Then you can just go while
playing games, like I do! It's really nice when you don't hafta get up and go to
the bathroom anymore!"
It was ten minutes after we started playing when Bryce said, "here it
goes". As it wasn't his turn to play he sat back and appeared to have been
letting loose his wastes into the diaper. I couldn't tell whether he was peeing
or pooping in them. I was too busy as I was in the midst of passing through a
difficult level on the game.
"My underpants are gonna be ruined!" he exclaimed.
As he mentioned that I thought back for a moment to the times when I
ruined my underpants.
"What did you do?" I asked.
"What did I do?" he repeated.
"Did you pee or poop?" I asked bluntly.
"Uhh...both, he said. Now I hafta tell your sister that I need to be
changed."
"It's either that or just sit in it awhile," I said. "And your mom may
stop by, and then what? What would you say to her?"
"I dunno. I guess I need to get changed."
"Okay, I'll get Cindy for you. Or do you want Gina to change you?"
"Uhh...," he paused.
"I'll get them both."
I had finished the game I was playing. I got up and looked out the front
window, but they were nowhere to be seen. I went to the back door and looked out
in the back yard. There was no sign of them. I went to mom in the kitchen where
she was baking some Christmas cookies.
"Where did Cindy go?" I asked mom.
"They're outside-- I thought they were-- why?"
"Well, uhh..."
"Do you need your diaper changed?" she asked.
"No," I answered.
"Does Bryce need *his* diaper changed?"
I didn't know whether to just tell mom, or wait until Cindy and Gina got
back. I wasn't sure if Bryce would want my mom to change him any more than he
wanted my sister or his sister to change him.
"I dunno, I'll ask him," I said.
As I walked back out to the living room I saw the two girls coming up the
walk. As they came in I summoned Cindy's attention.
"Um, Cindy, uh, Bryce needs to be...changed," I said.
"Really? So he's used them? Gina! Your brother needs to be changed!" Cindy
shouted. "Just go lie down on Chris' changing pad," Cindy said. "We'll be right
in there."
Was that "we"? Which one of them was going to change Bryce? I decided to
go in there, too. I figured Bryce would probably appreciate having a little
company while his poop-plastered posterior was about to be exposed to and wiped
up by one the two girls.
Gina decided that Bryce would probably be a little more comfortable if she
changed him instead of Cindy. She told him to sit upright as she went around and
removed all of the pins fastening his plastic pants to his shirt. Then she had
him lie down. Gina pulled off the plastic pants and then the dirty diaper. As
she pulled it off she noted that Bryce still had his underwear on.
"Eww!" she exclaimed. "Why did you leave your underwear on?" she asked.
"I was just gonna take the diaper back off after I put it on, and then you
guys made me wear it, so I had to leave my underwear on!"
Gina then pulled on the waistband of his underpants and pulled them off.
They were heavily covered with poop. She set them with the dirty diaper. Cindy
then handed Gina the wipes as she went to work on cleaning up Bryce's butt.
"Maybe we can wash your underpants and hope they get done before mom gets
here, but she's bound to show up any minute. For now you'll just have to wear
another diaper, unless Chris has any underwear you can wear."
Gina then turned to me. All I said is "well, uhh..."
"We got rid of all his underwear," Cindy said. "He didn't need it anymore
after he got put into diapers."
"It looks like you get another diaper," Gina said as she grabbed another
one of my diapers and put it on him. She grabbed another pair of plastic pants
and pulled them up into place."
"Now that you've used the diaper once, can we trust you to use this one,
or do we have to pin you in again?"
"I'll use it," Bryce said.
"Okay, because I tell mom if you don't!"
Bryce's underpants were beyond any hope of ever becoming clean again,
without being badly stained. In spite of that, Bryce insisted that they be
washed. "Can you get my underpants washed? Those are my favorite underpants!" he
whined. "Now they're ruined!"
"We'll get them in the wash, Bryce," Gina said. "They're going to be
stained, so you won't want to wear these around at bedtime anymore...unless you
mom to see what happened," she cautioned.
"No! No!" he said.
Dad then came in from the shop into the kitchen. He had a pleased look on
his face as if his team had been winning or had already won the game. He looked
out at the four of us as we were walking out of the wash room and through the
kitchen.
"What's this?" he asked as he poured himself a glass of soda. "Now BRYCE
is wearing diapers?"
"He wanted to try them, so...," Cindy said.
"First it's Chris, then Tony, and now Bryce! We might as well just make
every boy who comes into this house wear diapers from now on!"
"Great idea, dad!" Cindy exclaimed. "You might want to warn any of your
friends that want to come over, Chris," Cindy snickered. Dad sat down in his
recliner and clicked on the TV to watch the last quarter of the football game.
About twenty minutes later Gina's and Bryce's mom showed up.
"Mom's here!" Bryce exclaimed. He looked down at himself in the diapers
and plastic pants. He ran into my room and put on his pants. He came out with
his pants pulled up to where at least the top three inches of the diaper was
showing, and his fly was completely unzipped as his pants did not fit over my
diapers. He pulled his shirt over the top of his pants the best he could, but
this did no good. Not until he had his coat on was he finally able to conceal
what he was wearing.
He was putting his shoes on as his mom came inside the house.
"Good boy," she said. "You've even got your shoes and coat on and you're
all ready to go! Was he good, Gina?"
"Uhh...yeah, he was, for the most part."
Gina and Bryce then left for the evening. After dinner that evening I went
into my room and started writing the story I thought about earlier. I hoped that
I could get a lot written so that Tony would get to read it. I also made a few
notes about what happened to Bryce today. Perhaps I would write a story about
him if I thought about it.
DIAPER DESIRES: PART 29
-----------------------
SUNDAY, DECEMBER 3, 1989
I woke up wet this morning, which I expected after drinking a large glass
of water from the night before. I was the first one to be up, of course, and I
had to either venture out to the street in my diapers to get the newspaper, or
wait until someone better dressed than me was up to get it. It looked really
cold out there, and the neighbor across the street was out in his yard stringing
up his Christmas lights. I decided to wait.
After Cindy was awake she changed my wet diapers and then retrieved the
newspaper. I spent the morning reading the comics and just being lazy like I
always was on Sunday morning. I called Tony to see if he could come over, but I
wasn't getting an answer at his place. I was so eager to show him some of the
things I had drawn and written. I could barely contain my enthusiasm as I looked
at the story I started the night before and kept working on it.
Throughout the day there wasn't much of anything happening. I gave mom a
few more suggestions for my Christmas wish list with ideas culled from the
flurry of advertisements that accompany a typical Sunday paper, especially
around the holidays.
The whole day was a drag after that. I tried to get a hold of Tony again,
but he and his family were still gone. I was wanting to go outside and play in
the snow, but having only diapers to wear made for some limitations to the
activities I could do. MONDAY, DECEMBER 4, 1995
It was another week of school ahead of me. I boarded the school bus and
sat down with Tony.
"How was your weekend?" I asked Tony.
"We were gone all day yesterday," he said. "Went to see my grandma. We
helped her put up her tree."
"Yeah, we got ours put up, too. Cindy's friend Gina was over Saturday to
help, and she brought her brother Bryce, so I got stuck with him all day."
"What did you guys do?"
"We played with my cars a lot. Then Bryce wanted to try on one of my-- you
know..." There weren't a lot of kids talking on the bus to drown me out and I
didn't want to say the word "diaper" out loud.
"Really?" Tony replied. "So what happened?"
"Well, I'll have to tell you at recess, there's a lot that went on."
"Sounds good, I wish you would tell me now."
"I can tell you at lot more at recess when nobody is around. It'll be
better if I tell you then."
"Okay," Tony agreed.
We got off the bus and went to our classrooms. During the reading lesson I
got bored and started to daydream. I kept thinking about Saturday's incident
with Gina's brother Bryce. Then I pulled out a piece of paper and secretly
started writing a little story about it.
I only got to three or four sentences when Mrs. Buxley stopped her
discussion. While I wasn't listening, I could hear her babbling on with the
lesson as I concentrated on my own story. When I sensed the abrupt pause in the
droning sound of her lecture, I looked up and saw that she was looking directly
at me.
"Ahem, Chris! Do you know what page we're on?"
"Uhh...," I said. The class started laughing.
"What page is your book turned to?"
"Uhh, page 65?"
"We're on page 67. Put your writing assignment away until we're all ready
to do it."
Whew! I'm glad she didn't know that I wasn't even working on the writing
assignment at all! Embarrassed, I turned to the correct page in the book and
forcefully maintained my attention to Mrs. Buxley. I tried to find the place in
the story where it was being discussed. After two minutes of searching for the
first few words of the paragraph Mrs. Buxley was reading, I finally found the
place where I was supposed to be reading.
The reading lesson ended just as the recess bell rang. I told Tony that
I'd meet him at the secluded corner where we liked to go. After I got out there
I told him what happened over the weekend with Bryce.
"...so he put one on and he said he was gonna take it back off," I
started. "but he didn't...then Cindy came in to change me and Gina was with
her...so they made him wear the diaper the rest of the day!...then he pooped in
them and Gina changed him! ...then she put another diaper on him because his
underwear was dirty."
"Did his mom find out?" Tony asked.
"No, because Gina was gonna tell on him if he didn't wear the diaper. When
his mom picked him and Gina up he had to put his pants on over the diaper. I
wanna know if she found out he was wearing it!"
We were getting cold sitting out there so we got up and walked back toward
the building. We were expecting the bell to ring soon anyway. I looked around
for Mark, but I didn't see him anywhere. I figured he may have been sick again.
Maybe he was expecting us to meet just outside of the building and was waiting
for us there. It was too late by then as the bell started ringing.
I wanted to resume writing the story I started about Bryce, but Mrs.
Buxley had her eyes on the whole class. Another kid was caught not paying
attention to the math lesson. This time Mrs. Buxley walked over to his desk and
looked at what he was working on. It wasn't anything that had to do with
schoolwork as I learned when Mrs. Buxley read it aloud.
"Hey Mike! What are you doing after school?" she read. "My mom isn't going
to be home so we can goof around all day!"
"That's nice, Rodney," she commented to the offending student. "If you
want to 'goof around', then do it after school. For now, you'll be staying in
class for lunch."
What if she had done the same to me earlier? This diaper stuff was really
risky at school. What if she had read aloud what I had written? Whoa boy! I
decided that it wasn't a good time to do anything except for what Mrs. Buxley
wanted us to do.
It was lunch hour, and I proceeded to go to the nurse's office to get my
wet diaper taken care of. I then went out to the lunchroom where I would join
Tony. I expected Mark to be there, but he was nowhere to be found.
"Have you seen Mark?" I asked Tony.
"No. I haven't seen him."
I tried not to be too concerned, but I knew that Tony and I were his only
friends, so what was he doing if he wasn't with us? As we left our table and
walked outside we saw him sitting at a table with another kid. Maybe he did make
a new friend.
"Hi, Mark," I said as I walked up to his table.
"Hi, Chris. This is my friend Mike," said Mark.
"Hi, Mike, I said to the other kid, who acted as shy as Mark did."
"Uh, hi."
"We'll be on the swings," I said, expecting Mark to join Tony and I there.
Towards the end of the lunch hour Tony and I were swinging back and forth.
We never saw Mark, though. Maybe since he had a friend his own size he didn't
want to talk to us big, mean third- graders anymore. Then towards the end of
lunch hour he and his new friend Mike joined us on the two vacant swings next to
us, assuring that he still trusted us third-graders, at least Tony and I, to be
his friends as well. I don't know if Mark told Mike that he wore diapers, but
neither Tony nor I let on to Mike that all three of us wore diapers-- our common
bond-- though for different reasons, and there was really no reason to tell him.
The rest of the school day was like almost any other. I couldn't wait for
that bell to ring. In my usual state of restlessness I kept watching the clock,
watching the minute hand slowly work its way towards the "12" at the top of the
clock. Finally, the bell rang and I was out the door and on the bus.
Tony came over after school. After getting my diaper changed by Lisa she
told Tony to get his pants off and lie down on the pad, which Tony knew was the
best thing to do. She saw that he had wet his diaper. Since Tony brought his bag
into my room she just reached in there and pulled out one of his diapers and put
it on. Of course he was left to spend the afternoon in only the diaper he was
wearing, which he understood was one of the rules.
I pulled out some of the drawings and stories that I was working on. I
started by showing him the drawings I made. He liked the pictures very much.
"You draw these diapers really big, Chris!" he said. "Is this supposed to
be you?" he asked.
"Yep!"
"And did you draw any of me?"
"No, but me and you can do that today."
"Okay," he answered.
Then I showed him the stories that I wrote. He laughed as he read the
first one, which was the story of how I got put into diapers. It read:
"Why I Wear Diapers," by Chris Barrett, age 8
Hi, my name is Chris Barrett. I am 8 years old. Most kids that are 8 years dont
wear diapers but I do. My mom makes me wear diapers because I was pooping in my
underwear not on accident but because I did it on purpose. I had to hide my
dirty underwear in the closet but then my mom smelled it and got me diapers
because I pooped in my underwear a lot.
And so on. I knew it wasn't perfect, but it wasn't going to be read by
anybody other than myself and it certainly wasn't going to be graded. All I
cared about was what I said about myself in the story.
I then gave Tony some blank paper and some crayons.
"Here, draw you in a diaper," I said.
"Okay," said Tony as he eagerly and hastily began his first drawing.
"Tony! This is for our book! Draw it neat!" I said.
He then crumpled it up and started over. This time he was slower and more
careful in his effort. Later, after he finished his first contribution, we both
designed the cover and agreed on the title of "Chris and Tony's Diaper Book". We
each drew ourselves wearing our diapers underneath the title. Lastly, I went
through my closet and found a three-ring binder to put all the papers in.
We looked at our creation and were quite proud of what we had come up
with. Tony couldn't stay much longer, so he took off. Before leaving he said
that he would write a story about how he started wearing diapers and then put it
in the book next time he came over.
FRIDAY, DECEMBER 8, 1989
The rest of the week passed uneventfully. Thursday night was our school's
Christmas program where we all had to get up on stage and sing Christmas songs.
As I was not one to sing I lip- synched and appeared to be participating. Other
than that, it was an ordinary week in the youthful life of Chris Barrett.
Friday afternoon Tony came over to my house again. He brought with him the
story that he had been working on all week. He handed it to me for me to read on
the bus. I decided to add it to the book upon getting home. Tony then mentioned
that he wished that he could have a copy of the book. We then agreed that we
would have two copies of the book, one for each of us. We would draw another
cover for Tony's copy later, just like the first one we made. Lastly, anything I
made I would keep my original and give Tony a photocopy, and he would get to do
the same with his creations.
Now what we needed to do was to get to the public library to get
photocopies. Right as I got home I asked mom if she could run us down there.
"Well, that would be alright," mom said. Any good parent would encourage
their children to read and would honor any requests to be taken to the library,
just that Tony and I had something different in mind. "We need to make copies,"
I said.
"Couldn't you do that at school today?" mom asked.
"This isn't for school," I said, which it certainly wasn't. "We just want
copies of some papers me and Tony drew."
"Well, okay, but I want you to find a book and check it out and read it
while we're going there," mom stipulated.
"Do you need your diaper changed first?" mom asked.
"No," I replied, even though I had wet in them.
"Okay, then I'll take you down there."
As we got to the library mom told us not to be in there for very long as
she waited for us in the car outside. Mom handed me two dollars for the copiers
and told me to get change for them. She also handed me her library card.
We went inside and walked up to one of the copiers.
"Do you know how to use this?" Tony asked me.
"I think you just put the paper on here, press the green button and that's
it," I said.
I was thinking that the copier would be like the one in the school
library. It wasn't. It was much more complicated as it had a wide array of at
least a dozen buttons. Standing there confused, a librarian got up and saw that
we needed help.
"Can I help you boys?" she asked.
I didn't want her to see what it was we were copying, but we needed to at
least have her show us how to run the thing.
"Uh, yeah, how do you run this?" I asked her.
"Well, you need to put some money in it. Do you have any money?"
I reached into my coat pocket and pulled out the two one- dollar bills mom
gave me. "I got two dollars," I said.
"I'll get you some change with that," the librarian kindly offered.
As she came back she said "let me help you with your copies."
She lifted the lid and saw the drawing lying on the glass, face up. It was
one of my drawings with my butt heavily diapered.
She looked at it oddly and then turned it over. She showed us that the
paper needs to be facing down and aligned with the red marks on the sides of the
glass.
"Now just put your dime in and press the green button," she instructed.
"Think you got it?"
"Uh, yes, thank you, ma'am," I said to her courteously as she returned to
her desk.
We went through each paper that was in that notebook and made copies of
them. Now Tony had a copy of everything I made and I had copies of his stuff,
allowing him to take back his originals. The only problem with copies was that
they wouldn't reproduce the colors in the color drawings, but we accepted what
we could get.
Before leaving I glanced over some of the books and picked one out that
looked interesting. I went up to the same librarian to check the book out.
"Did you boys get all your copies okay?" she asked us.
"Yes, we did," I said.
"Good," she replied, although I wasn't sure if she meant that she was glad
we got our mission accomplished or if she just didn't want to see anything else
that we may have drawn.
"There you go, have a nice weekend," she said as she handed me the book.
We headed back out to the car, where I gave mom the library card and what
remained of the two dollars.
"What were you guys copying?" mom asked.
"Just some drawings me and Tony made," I said.
"You guys have been doing a lot of drawing lately, what are you working
on?"
I didn't want to go into details, but at least I wasn't going to be lying
when I told mom.
"Me and Tony are making a book," I said.
"Oh? What's this book about?"
"It's about me and Tony and things we do together."
"That's a good idea, Chris. You'll want to hold onto that book because
when you get older you'll remember all the things you and Tony used to do
together. Wish I had done that when I was younger," mom added regretfully. "I
didn't keep a diary or anything until I was in high school. You'll appreciate
this a lot more when you get to be grown up, Chris."
As we got home I noticed a green piece of paper tucked into the door jam.
I glanced at it briefly. All I caught were the phrases "canned food drive,"
"carolers," and "December 19". I then handed it to mom, thinking that it may
have been something important. Back in the house and in my bedroom, we started
to sort through the copies, determining which ones were for Tony and which ones
were for me. Lisa came into the room and saw all the papers strewn about the
floor.
"Nice pictures, Chris!" Lisa said. "If you want to wear your diapers like
that I can do that, you know!" she said.
"You already put three on me, that's enough," I said.
"I can only fit three on you, Chris; otherwise I'd make you wear more!
It's time for your diaper change," she said. "You too, Tony."
"I'm gonna be going home," he said.
"Now, now, it'll only take a minute," she said.
Tony decided to stay and let Lisa change his diaper, too, rather than push
the matter any further. Tony had his diaper changed first before heading home.
While I was getting changed he gathered up his stuff and headed home.
"I might come over tomorrow," he said as he left.
"Okay, see you then, bye!"
DIAPER DESIRES: PART 30
-----------------------
MONDAY, DECEMBER 11, 1989
Today was like most other Mondays at school. I disliked the very fact that
it was Monday and all I wanted was for the next weekend to get here. Even more,
being this time of year, I wanted the Christmas break to get here soon.
The week that followed was just like any other week. The highlight of the
week, in fact, was tonight's trip to the supermarket. I noticed that mom was
loading the cart up with several canned goods, mostly things that she normally
didn't buy. I then found out that it was for the food drive that was announced
in the flyer that was put in our door. Mom then explained how a lot of families
are less fortunate than ours and need extra help from those who can afford it.
She was instilling in me a valuable lesson on helping others when you can. It
made me feel good that my family cared enough to help others.
Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday all seemed to blur together that week.
Each night was the same thing. I didn't see much of Lisa as mom and dad were
pushing her to get her grades caught up. Cindy was better about doing her
homework, but mom and dad were also pushing her to get her grades. I had a few
math assignments to take home, so I wasn't completely free from the burden of
doing homework, I just had a lot less of it to do.
FRIDAY, DECEMBER 15, 1989
Friday was a little different than the rest of the week. I didn't have any
homework, which was nice, and if Lisa or Cindy had it, they weren't about to
touch it until Sunday night like they usually did. While Tony didn't get to stay
over that night, he was there to enjoy our "pizza night," which was usually
designated for Friday evenings. Of course Tony was also subjected to the "rules"
that applied to diaper wearing in our house, which meant he had to stay in his
diapers and to allow Lisa and Cindy to change him. While Tony acted like he
didn't want my sisters changing him, I had a feeling that he enjoyed it somehow.
SATURDAY, DECEMBER 16, 1989
It was Saturday morning once again. I did my usual Saturday morning stuff,
watching cartoons, drinking hot chocolate and eating cereal, the perfect thing
to do on a cold, foggy morning as it was today.
It remained foggy all day, the perfect kind of day to stay inside and
enjoy the secure feeling of having a warm house to live in. Add that to the fact
that my diapers also gave me a warm, secure feeling as well.
Today, however, wasn't a day that was spent in a cozy home lounging around
in diapers. This was the day mom took all of us to the mall for Christmas
shopping. Mom had Cindy put me in a disposable diaper before we left, that way I
could be changed more easily. She also made sure that Cindy brought along
several diapers just in case I really needed to go. Since mom expected us to be
at the mall awhile I would certainly end up doing something in my diapers and
needing a change at least once, possibly twice before we were ready to leave.
Just getting to the mall was an adventure. The streets were all icy and
slick, the air was still densely foggy, and traffic was fierce. We almost got
slammed into by a big pickup truck whose driver was going too fast, apparently
complacent that his big truck could handle the road conditions. Even though I
was used to wetting in my diapers anyway, I'm surprised I didn't wet them as I
watched that truck slide towards my side of the car!
We arrived at the mall safely, but shaken. It was only thirty minutes into
our shopping trip when I became restless and bored. Mom went into several
clothing stores and visited the mens' departments of each one looking for one of
dad's gifts. The drab colors and decor in such departments was hardly
stimulating.
"Mom, I'm boooorred!" I whined.
"Will you just sit still, Chris?" mom told me. "We won't be much longer."
"Can I go to the toy store?" I asked.
"Well, alright. Lisa, can you take Chris to the toy store?"
"Yes, mom."
"And do you have Chris' diaper bag?"
"Here, Lisa," said Cindy as she handed the bag over, "here's Chris' diaper
bag."
"Yes, I have Chris' diaper bag! Ooh, and there's plenty of diapers in
Chris' diaper bag, too. Chris' diaper bag isn't a lot of good if it doesn't have
a lot of diapers in it, so I'm glad that Chris' diaper bag is full of diapers.
He'll probably use them all of the diapers up!"
It was enough that mom mentioned the diaper bag out loud once, followed by
Cindy's mention of it. But then Lisa was making a point of mentioning the diaper
bag out loud. There were other shoppers with children in the vicinity, so I knew
Lisa was doing it to embarrass me. Some of them looked over at us and knew that
I was the one wearing the diapers. They probably expected to see a toddler, but
it quickly became apparent to others that I was "Chris" as Lisa said, "let's go
to the toy store, Chris."
"Watch the time," mom said. "We'll meet at 1:30 by the fountain."
Lisa accompanied me as she and I left that yawn-inducing store that mom
seemed to spend forever in. I was glad to just be out of that store, regardless
of where we were heading. As we walked Lisa freely swung around the diaper bag.
It was a diaper bag for a baby, complete with pastel-colored prints of teddy
bears, balloons, and the like.
"Lisa, do you have to swing that around?" I said.
"Swing what around?" she asked.
"The diaper bag," I said quietly.
"The what? Oh, YOUR DIAPER BAG!"
"Lisa!" I said.
She started laughing. "Oh, Chris, you're so fun to embarrass! Come on!
Here's the toy store."
I went around and looked at all of the neat toys that lined shelf after
shelf in that store. I stopped for a moment and thought of what it would be like
to have every toy I wished for sitting under the Christmas tree.
Even though Lisa was twelve, there were a lot of girls' toys available
that she was still interested in. As she and I were not to separate, I had to
stand there with her and look at all the pink-colored containers in which girls'
toys were typically packaged. While standing there I needed to go in the diaper,
and it felt like it was going to be wet, runny, and downright messy, too.
I tried to hold it as I felt embarrassed to be standing among several
other girls as it was. In just a couple minutes I had let it loose. Right there
in the toy store I let out a big mess. I knew that I would need to get changed
right away or the mess may start to leak out, which would have been even more
embarrassing. I walked over to Lisa and quietly told her I needed a change.
"I know, I can smell it," she said, though not so quietly.
"Uh, where are you going to change me?" I asked.
"I'll have to take you into the bathroom."
"How will you do that?" I asked. "You can't go in the boys' bathroom."
"We're not going in the boys' bathroom, we'll have to go to the girls'
bathroom instead."
I felt even more embarrassed as I was about to be taken into the girls'
bathroom, which was labeled as such as children, of course, frequented the toy
store. The store was very crowded, so I knew that I would be seen going in there
with my sister. I didn't want to go in there, but my diaper wasn't going to
contain my mess for very long.
Sure enough, there were a lot of people all around as we went back to the
restroom entrance. Just as if Lisa were a mother and I were a toddler, Lisa took
me by the hand and dragged me into the girls' bathroom.
I had never been in a girls' bathroom until today. Most notably lacking
were urinals, which I pretty much expected not to see in a girls' bathroom. The
girls' bathroom also had counters for parents to change diapers. Lisa took me
over to one of them. Two mothers were busy changing their own kids on each side
of us. As there was a lot of in-and-out traffic, many of the restroom's
occupants saw Lisa standing before me. My legs dangled off the counter,
obviously designed for kids much smaller than myself.
I heard one older girl, probably in her teens, talking to her friends as
they left the restroom. "Did you see that? That boy had to have been at least
eight years old! The girl changing him must be about twelve or thirteen! They
must be brother and sister...weird!" I tried to act like this was nothing, but
it was very embarrassing! Even though nobody knew who I was, I knew I stood out
quite plainly, being the only older boy in the restroom, and getting his diaper
changed by his twelve-year-old sister!
"I'll bet you never been inside a girls' bathroom before, Chris!" Lisa
said.
"No, I haven't," I said quietly.
"Geez, Chris! What a mess!" she said. It had been a little while since I
remember having such a runny mess in my diaper. She tossed the soiled diaper
into the pail below.
"Yours is the biggest diaper in there!" Lisa said. "I wonder what other
parents will think when they see your diaper in there, being that it's so much
bigger."
Lisa then pulled a fresh diaper out of the bag. Just like she did at home,
she slid the diaper beneath me and fastened the sides. Unlike at home, however,
I was given my pants. It was even more embarrassing to have to stand there and
put my pants on with all these girls walking by and all staring! They were
saying things about me!
"There's a boy in here, mom! And he's wearing a diapers!"
"Look, a boy! Why is he in here? Is that a diaper he has on?"
"Mom, isn't that kid a little old for diapers?"
I heard several such remarks before deciding to turn around to conceal my
face from view. At least if all they saw was my butt they couldn't tell who it
was wearing a diaper and putting his pants on a girls' bathroom! Boy, I was glad
to get out of there! Thank goodness Megan or Tracy didn't by chance happen to be
there at the mall and in the girls' restroom of the toy store! While I thought
about the possibility of it, I knew that it was a very unlikely chance for such
an occurrence.
We then left the toy store and looked around in a novelty store and then
in a software store where, among selling games for different computer systems,
had every Nintendo game imaginable. There were more titles than I could possibly
wish for on my Christmas list. Many of them I had already written on my list,
but there were others I never saw before. Before we knew it was almost 1:30. We
got going and headed for our meeting place near the fountain. Mom and Cindy were
already there with several bags.
"Is everyone hungry?" mom said. As we all unanimously agreed, we went up
the escalators to the food court directly above. After we got all our food and
got seated, Lisa just went ahead and told us all about my diaper change.
"Chris got to go into the girls' bathroom today!" she said.
"Really?" said Cindy. "How did he managed that?"
"Chris made a big mess in his diaper in the toy store, so I took him in
the girls' bathroom to change him! Wasn't that just exciting, Chris?"
"Uh, yeah, it was," I said. What was I going to say, that it wasn't
exciting? It wasn't exciting in that it was necessarily fun, but it was indeed a
new experience and quite an adventure!
"When do we go home?" I asked, feeling tired.
"I'm going to look in just a few more stores and then we'll leave."
Mom always tried to make it sound like we'd just be in and out of each
store, but it never turned out that way. I wanted to go to the video arcade, but
mom wanted us to all stick together. We left the mall and went to some other
shopping centers. At least we were in various discount stores that had a toy
department for me to escape to. Still, I was getting tired and I just wanted to
get home and take a nap.
By 3:30 we finally left the mad-paced shopping frenzy and went home,
stopping for ice cream first. Since then I had wet my diaper but I was just left
in it until we got home, where I was once again put into my super-thick cotton
diapers. I was wanting to take a nap and did so after I was changed. Not until
after the sun had gone down did I wake up just in time for dinner.
SUNDAY, DECEMBER 17, 1989
I didn't do much today, at least until evening when we all got into the
car and drove around the subdivision to look at everyone's Christmas light
displays. For much of the day I was in my bedroom thinking of another story to
write. I couldn't really think of much to write as I was still feeling tired. In
fact, I took another nap that afternoon.
Late in the afternoon Betty was over to help Lisa with making popcorn
balls, a Christmas tradition in the family. Lisa was just beginning to change my
diapers when Betty showed up. It had been awhile since Betty had been over. As
she saw me getting changed she asked me, "how's ol' Diaper-Butt been?" She was
still calling me that, in fact she rarely called me Chris anymore. I think she
got so much pleasure from calling me "Diaper Butt" and watching me get changed
was because she her own brother didn't wear them and she didn't get to tease him
for it.
"I wish my brother wore diapers," she commented. "He would be so fun to
tease, like I tease you. He's a real brat and I'd like to show him who's the big
sister some time!"
"Why don't you take some of Chris' diapers with you?" Lisa suggested to
Betty. "Then, tell him to be good or you'll make him wear the diapers."
"I would," Betty agreed to Lisa's offer, "but Carl is a lot bigger and
Chris' diapers probably wouldn't fit him; otherwise I would have asked you for
some a long time ago. The little shit! he's such a brat and I'd like him to know
just who his big sister is! And what she can make him do!"
"Take some plastic pants, too," Lisa advised. "They should fit over his
underwear, so you can at least make him wear those!"
In all the time Betty had been coming over, I only saw her brother, Carl,
with her once or twice. He was a fifth-grader, although he did not go to my
school. He didn't look like a kid I'd get along with, perhaps because he bore a
resemblance to one of Sean's friends. But then I was being prejudiced. He was
probably a decent kid, I just didn't know him.
I wondered what would become of Betty's brother if he were forced to wear
the plastic pants. On a similar note, as I had thought about it, what had become
of Gina's brother Bryce? I hadn't heard from Cindy if Gina had mentioned
anything about Bryce since the day he was here at my house and put into diapers.
If Betty's brother Carl were to wear them, too, he would become the fourth
boy I would know of besides myself that had worn diapers past toddlerhood, and
he would also be the oldest boy I would ever know of in diapers.
I learned from Cindy later that afternoon that Bryce was, in fact, caught
with the diaper on and was forced to wear it for the rest of the day. According
to Cindy, Gina also said that if Bryce was ever caught wetting or messing his
pants again he would get put into diapers for good. Gina explained that Bryce
had a history of doing this. In a way, it sounded like Bryce and I had some
remarkable similarities. I hoped I would get an update on this soon.
That evening after Betty went home we all got into the car and drove
around our subdivision and in other places to admire everyone's Christmas
lights. We spent about an hour driving through the more affluent neighborhoods
and up into the hills where the entire city below was visible.
MONDAY, DECEMBER 18, 1989
It was just an ordinary day at school, though I had the sniffles from the
prolonged cold and snowy weather, plus the fact that I had the runs, too. The
disposable diapers I wore in school were pushed to their limit as I had frequent
wet, messy bowel movements. At one point I was afraid of them leaking out into
my pants during the math lesson. As luck would have it, we were assigned math
exercises at the board today, and everyone in class got a problem to do. While I
was up there I had a big load in my diaper that I couldn't wait to have changed.
I kept thinking that it would begin to leak and I would once again face the
embarrassment that I faced not too long ago when I had an in-class accident with
no diapers on. After that incident I was quite aware of how things felt in my
diaper area whenever I was up before the class, and I was very concerned with
how it may look, too. There must have been nothing extraordinary as everyone
just saw the usual bulge of my diapers beneath my pants.
Even the nurse was impressed by how I filled my diapers. She usually
remained professional in her job and rarely said anything about the very job was
doing, but today she said, "wow, Chris! Yours is the messiest diaper I've
changed in a long time!" This sounded like something my own sisters would say
when they changed me.
It went further than that one comment. As the cleanup time spent on my
derriere took longer than it usually did, the nurse started talking to me.
"Do you really *need* to wear diapers?" she asked me. "I'm sorry, I
shouldn't ask you that if you'd rather not answer," she apologized. It was
another slip of her professionalism, which she quickly realized afterwards,
hoping that I wasn't offended. I wasn't offended by any means, though I was
surprised that she did overstep the bounds of professionalism which was to just
do her job without regards to whether or not I needed to wear diapers.
"Well, no I don't *need* to wear them," I said. "I just wear them
because...I want to."
"There's nothing wrong with that," she said. "I've thought that of you all
along. You seem to enjoy wearing diapers...and you're not the only one. Lots of
boys like you wear them just to wear them."
Nothing more was said after that. She put the clean diaper on and handed
me my pants. As I expected to be in need of another change, I told the nurse
that I would be back again at the afternoon recess.
Tony was sitting down waiting for me. Mark and his friend were sitting
across from Tony. I sat down next to Tony and ate my lunch with the other three
boys. Afterwards we split ways, with Tony and I going to our corner of the
playground and Mark and his friend going elsewhere.
Later that afternoon as the afternoon recess was dismissed I returned to
see the nurse as expected. I didn't leave such a large load for her to change
this time, but it was evident that I was still having loose, runny bowels. The
nurse didn't say much to me as she just did her job like she was expected to do.
On the way home from school on the bus I asked Tony about the nurse.
"Does the nurse ever talk to you much?" I asked.
"No, not really. She just says hi to me and changes me."
"She asked me today if I needed to wear diapers. I told her that I didn't
need to wear them but I just liked to wear them. Then she said that a lot of
kids just wear them because they like to."
"She'd probably right, Chris," Tony said. "Look at, uh... who's that kid
you were talking about? Cindy's friend's brother? Uh..."
"Bryce!" I said to help him.
"Yeah, Bryce. He'd wear diapers if he wanted to because he wanted to wear
yours."
"Yeah, you're right, Tony. So why don't those of us who wear them just do
so and not care what others think?" I asked.
"Because we're not supposed to wear diapers," Tony said. "We're big kids,
and big kids don't wear diapers, only babies. Sometimes I think I'd rather be a
baby," Tony commented.
"If I could just have someone do everything for me I'd be happy. I even
have a pacifier," he said.
"I know," I added. "I saw it on your floor when I stayed over."
"You did?" Tony asked, acting defensive, a little embarrassed of the fact
that I knew about it.
"Yeah, and how did you get a pacifier?"
"One day me and my mom were in the grocery store and I sneaked a pacifier into
the cart, hoping my mom wouldn't know it was there. It was rung up and thrown
into the bag. Then while we were going home I was in the back seat with all the
groceries and I found my pacifier and took it out of the bag. My mom still
doesn't know that I have it."
I got off the bus and walked home without Tony. He had to go straight home
and get off at his stop. I spent the rest of the afternoon doing what I always
did. I still had diarrhea and my diapers were excessively soiled by the time I
got them changed again, which wasn't until five that day.
Diaper Desires, Parts 31-42