Simon’s Journal
Volume IV
Thirteen
Summer Days
A New Beginning
Written by Danny
Chapter – 3
Sunday
“Mooooooom!” I yelled as I awoke to find myself
swimming in my sheets.
My first thought was that I had yet another
leak but that wasn’t the case at all. The best guess any of us could come up
with was that I must have got up in the middle of the night, taken off my
diaper, tossed it in the diaper pail and then went back to bed.
When I pulled back my covers I saw that I was
lying there wearing a pajama shirt and nothing else. No pajama bottoms and most
importantly no diaper.
Mom came in soon followed by dad.
“Simon where’s your diaper?” Mom asked.
Due to my agitation at waking up soaked to
the bone I shouted, “I don’t know!”
Dad walked in.
“Oh there he blows!” he announces as a stream
of pee shot out of me, arched through the air and splashes my feet before I got
a chance to cover myself with my hands.
Both mom and I were physically and verbally
upset but dad stepped between us and said, “It’s only a little salty water.
Come on! It’s not like it’s spilt milk. I mean am I right or am I right? I’m
right, right?”
Yeah it was a corny pun but it worked to
defuse the escalating moment. Mom pulled my covers back over me until I
finished peeing and dad went over to the diaper pail where he found not just
last nights diaper but also my pajama pants.
Once my bladder had emptied again I threw off
my covers and swung my legs out of bed. I was thankful that it was summer
‘cause any other time of the year getting out of bed when I was that wet would
have been a truly chilling experience.
I reached up to run my fingers through my
hair only to find my hair was wet too. One look at my pillow and I knew why.
“Dang I must have peed enough to fill a
swimming pool.” I said while pulling off my very wet pajama shirt.
“And that was after you took off your diaper
last night.” Mom added.
“Hey you, drippy person,” dad said while
taking my wet pajama shirt away from me, “to the shower!”
I lifted myself to my feet and stopped when
Mom said, “Wait, what is that?”
I turned to see what mom was on about. She
was looking down at my feet; I looked to. They were covered with mud.
In the space of a millisecond dad went from
calm and jovial to a full burning mad.
“You were outside last night weren’t you?” he
asked so loud and so forcefully that I staggered backward as his words impacted
my nude, clammy body.
“Dad I swear I wasn’t!” I said while crossing
my heart.
“Wait, why aren’t there any muddy footprints
on the floor?” Mom asked and that seemed to puzzle dad enough to make him
hesitate before killing me.
I scanned the floor along with my parents;
except for five prints I’d made when I got out of bed, there was a complete
absents of mud on the floor.
“You guys got to believe me!” I pleaded and
was nearly on the verge if tears knowing that something weird was going on
here.
“Dad, pleeeeeeaaase!” I begged.
“Alright, just calm down!” he said resolutely.
Mom who had been stripping my bed stood up,
dropped the sheets on the bed and headed down the hallway.
“There’s no mud anywhere.” She announced.
“Wait!” I nearly shouted, “If I went outside
then the alarm would have gone off right?”
Not saying anything dad walked out of my room
to go check that the alarm was in deed still activated. He stopped just outside
my bedroom door, tossed my wet pajama shirt to me and then ordered me to, “Get
your shower.”
I first used my wet pajama shirt to clean my
feet, boy was it cold too; tossed it into the laundry basket and then tiptoed
to the bathroom just in case I missed some mud. Regardless of washing my hair
twice, I was out of the shower in less than five minutes.
Wrapped in a towel and still mostly wet
‘cause I hadn’t taken the time to properly dry myself I walked out into the
living room where I found dad talking with... yep I should have guessed it, Tom
Segal.
“Was it on?” I asked.
“And good morning to you too.” Tom said to
me.
“Yeah, yeah! Was the alarm still on or not?”
I asked impatiently.
Dad turned around and was expressing his
unprecedented confusion for the presences of mud on my feet with no logical
means for it being there.
“Like I was saying,” Tom said, “I will have
the data double checked but as it looks right now, we have no record of Simon
leaving his room last night let alone the house.”
I didn’t want to but I was so worked up that
I started to cry. My reason was because though they said they believe me, I
could tell they didn’t really. In my head I could hear myself saying, “Come on
now Simon! There’s no use starting to cry!”
I swallowed hard against the forming lump in
my throat and felt angry with myself for wanting to cry.
“Stop it this moment! Stop! Stop! Stop!” I
told myself.
I swallowed again and found my voice once
more.
“I swear I wasn’t out dad! Please believe
me!” I pleaded.
Mom moved toward me like she was going to
comfort me but I turned and started to run back to my room, loosing my towel in
the process.
“SIMON!” Tom shouted so loud the roof rafters
shook, “Get your ass back here!”
I’d never heard Tom yell like that before and
you can bet it scared the crap out of me.
I returned and stopped behind dad’s recliner
to hide my nudity.
“Come here!” Tom said while pointing to the
floor before him.
One look and I could see that something I’d
done or said had really pissed him off.
Forgetting my nudity, I stepped around the
chair.
“Where the hell is your GPS band?” he asked
and as one all four of us looked down at my ankle to see that the yellow ankle
bracelet was gone.
I looked up at Tom first, then to dad and
back to my ankle in utter disbelief. I lifted my foot off the carpet and shook
it as though I could somehow make it reappear on my ankle.
Tom stepped forward grabbed me hard, spun me
around and had clapped handcuffs on me so fast I didn’t even know he’d done it
until he pushed me down in dad’s chair. And there I sat with my hands locked
behind my back and an expression of surprise and terror on my face.
“Watch him and don’t let him out of that
chair!” he ordered dad as he pulled his cell phone out of his inside jacket
pocket and made a call.
One minute later that same geaky FBI guy that
had been here yesterday appeared. He looked like he had not slept all night and
there was a large wet spot on the front of his suit jacket. I surmised that he
must have spilt his coffee in his rush to come when Tom called him.
“The boys GPS band has been removed. I want
his bedroom searched first and be sure to check every window and door in the
entire house for any evidence that he has tampered with the alarm sensors.”
“But Tom I swear...” I started to say but
stopped when he looked at me with a flaming eye.
It was only then, after seeing Tom... “How
many times since I got back from the camp?” I asked myself, only now did I
realize Tom hadn’t been wearing his eye patch anymore ‘cause he now had two
eyes. I only had maybe one tenth of a second to check out his new eye but that
was long enough to realize that he now had a new glass eye.
“How could I have missed that?” I thought not
realizing I’d spoke those words.
“Missed what?” Tom asked so mean that it
wouldn’t have surprised me if he had spit on me right then.
“Your eye!” I said.
I was so surprised by his new glass eye that
for several moments I had forgot about everything else.
Tom made a sucking sound through his two
front teeth and I’ll never know if he was going to say anything ‘cause right
then that young FBI guy came back from my room carrying the ankle devise.
“It was inside a white bucket thing next to
the dresser with a bunch of used diapers sir.” He said to Tom.
“How did it get there?” I asked before anyone
else could.
Tom inspected the devise as the other guy
said, “I thought these couldn’t be taken off without the proper electronic
key?”
“They can’t!” Tom said still angry but
confused now to.
Tom said something to the younger guy using
some technical words and like a rabbit he hopped himself out of the house. The
only parts understood were, “Check the tracking chip’s data and the _____.”
“Tracking chip?” I mumbled to myself as I
recognized one of the words Tom had said and then it was my turn to get mad.
Still stark naked and my hands cuffed behind
my back I jumped to my feet and tried to attack Tom by kicking him.
“You son of a bitch! You promised you
wouldn’t put another one of those in me!”
Dad wrestled me away and practically threw me
onto the couch.
“NOW SIT THERE AND DON’T MOVE AGAIN!” Dad
screamed at me so angrily I thought he might strike me.
Partially ignoring dad I shouted at Tom, “You
promised!”
Completely disregarding my rant Tom asked,
“Who came to see you last night?”
“What?” mom and I both asked at the same
time.
Tom held up the yellow device, “There is a
special electronic key that releases the locking pin on these and every one is
different. There are only two people that have the key to this one.”
“Who?” Dad asked.
“His
“What’s a
“Probation Officer.” Dad answered.
And then he asked me again, “Who was here
last night? Was it Fyer?”
“Tom?” I said pleadingly, “Why don’t you guys
believe me! I wasn’t out of the house last night! I don’t know how that came
off and no one came to see me!”
“Fyer? Wait, you mean that little guy who...”
Dad started to say but trailed off without finishing his thought.
Tom moved toward me but thankfully that young
guy came racing back in with a small bit of white paper. He was also now
missing his suit jacket and I could see he wasn’t wearing a shoulder holster
like Tom was.
He handed the paper to Tom and said, “There
is no way that is wrong sir. The subject never left his bed last night.”
“And the audio?” Tom asked.
The young guy paused, looked at me and said,
“They’re double checking it now, but it appears there was a two hour and
fourteen minute signal interruption which started at 2:12 and ended at 4:26.”
Tom mumbled to himself, “Fyer, what were you
up to for over two hours this morning.
That young agent nervously shifted his weight
from one leg to the other and back again.
“What is it?” Tom asked without looking at
him.
Sounding like a cartoon character the young
guy squeaked out, “I don’t understand how this is possible.”
He then handed the paper back to the guy,
said something I couldn’t hear and then the guy left again. When he opened the
screen door to go out my cat came running from somewhere in the back of the
house; ran past everyone and vanished out the front door. However, what every
one of us saw was that she was completely covered in filth and mud.
I should tell you that my cat Lil’ Vera isn’t
like other cats. You can take any cat in the world, get it dirty and it will
run off and start to lick itself clean. Lil’ Vera won’t; she is just like her
mother used to be. Oh she’s been known to do a little fur maintenance, but for
the most part, she couldn’t care less if she is clean or dirty. Most of the
time mom has to catch Lil’ Vera and bathe her in the kitchen sink and cut burs
out of her fur.
Tom looked at dad and said, “Catch” as he
tossed something shiny to him, “You can unlock those now.”
“Why did you put them on me in the first
place?” It was clear to all that I was still mad.
“To scare you.” Tom answered unflappably.
“Yeah? Well it worked!” I shouted and then
under my breath so that they couldn’t hear me I called him a fatherless son of
a whore except I used the single word which meant the same thing.
And as soon as dad released one side of the
cuffs I was off. I stepped on the coffee table and launched myself through the
air toward Tom.
Out of my mouth came all of my emotions in
the form of a battle cry. “Ahhhhhh!” followed by the following words which,
“I’m gonna rip your head off and crap down your neck!”
Yeah it was a suicide attempt at best but
there was a small chance that I might at least make him bleed a bit before I
died. Except I didn’t even get to touch him ‘cause dad had thwarted my efforts
by catching me around the waist and yanking me backward. As I hit the sofa I
bounced once and heard a loud cracking sound. Thankfully it was the sofa that
cracked and not me.
I was lost to my flaming anger as I struggled
and flailed like a wild boy while dad attempted to restrain me.
“Come here so I can rip that other eye out of
your effing head you lying...” and I was about to start spouting off more cuss
words like BJ but dad’s hand went over my mouth and stopped me. However only
momentarily.
Like the beast I was emulating I sank my
teeth into dad’s hand. It worked, he dropped me and I got away but I didn’t get
to do any damage to Tom. Calm as can be Tom reached out and caught hold of me
by that bit of muscle that connects the side of the neck to the shoulder. You
know the place where Spock from Star Trek used to do that Vulcan Neck Pinch
thing. Well that was all it took for Tom to paralyze me with pain. Boy it sure
hurt.
“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” I screamed as
my nude body crumpled and I collapsed to my knees.
None of my limbs were working. I couldn’t see
or form a single word. All I could do was to scream through the pain. Without
releasing his hold on me Tom knelt down and gripped the back of my head firmly.
“SIMON!” he shouted right in my face to get
my attention, “Just stop this right now! Do you hear me? None of us are here to
hurt you; we are here because we love you!”
Somehow I managed to nod my head and he released
his nerve pinch. If he hadn’t been holding me so tightly, I would have fallen
the rest of the way to the floor. That pinch had taken the fight out of me.
“I did not lie to you and I did not place
another tracking chip in you.”
“Yes you did! I heard you tell him!” I
whimpered as I rubbed and tried to sooth my aching neck.
“Your little friend missed one before.” Tom
said so calmly that you’d thought he just told me the time.
Like a flash of lightning my anger was gone
leaving me feeling empty and discontented.
“But-but-but you’re the one that put them in
me in the first place!” I said.
Tom’s scarred face twisted into a scary
smile, “Actually, I, meaning the FBI, only put one in. I suspect the others
were put there by...”
“Madam-M!” I said with venom.
Tom nodded his agreement. “And you received
one curtsy of Children’s Services before you were put in emergency foster
care.”
Dad leaned over and helped me up from the
floor as I continued talking to Tom.
“Still you put one in me!” I said wiping my snotty
nose on my bare arm.
“Oh Simon use a tissue!” mom groaned as she
reached between us to pull a tissue from the tissue box on the end table
between her and dad’s chairs.
“Well if you want to get technical, I wasn’t
the one to do it.” Tom said as he sat himself in dad’s chair.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” I asked after
blowing my nose.
“Agent Morris did it when you were in the
hospital after you were beat-up in school.” Tom said.
“Who’s Agent Morris?” I asked.
Dad pointed out the front screen door, “That
chap that was here a moment ago.”
I had a momentary thought, “Chap? Dad, are
you going British on me or something?” but I let it go without giving life to
the thought by verbalizing it.
“That was before he was assigned as my
partner.” Tom said, “Besides being a good agent, or he will be when I’m done
with him, he also has military medical field training. Bit excitable though and
drinks coffee like a fish.”
It didn’t occur to me at the time but I
should have said that fish don’t drink coffee.
“Get it out!” I said vehemently.
“Can’t,” Tom said bluntly.
“Why not?” Dad and I asked at the same time.
“We’d have to break a bone.” Tom said smugly.
“It’s in my bones? Which one?” I asked
knowing full well he wasn’t about to tell me.
No, Tom clammed right up and began thinking.
He then asked dad about Lil’ Vera.
“Was that cat in here when you closed up the
house last night?”
Dad frowned and looked at mom with concern.
“She went out and wouldn’t come back in so I
locked the door and set the alarm before going to bed.”
Tom clapped his hands together and said,
“Whelp that pretty much settles it for me then.”
“Now wait a second!” I spouted off.
“Are you going to run around naked all day?”
Tom asked in a failed attempt to ignore our concerns.
“Come on Tom, you can’t leave us hanging like
this.” Dad said.
Mom added, “Especially if you want invited
over for home cooking again!” and though she tried to make it sound somewhat
comical, there was also the underlying melody of fear and anger still brewing
just below the surface.
Tom hesitated while he shoved his hands into
his pants pockets. He then sat down in dad’s chair and said, “If you take
everything into account it is clear that someone paid Simon a visit last
night.”
“You think someone broke in?” Mom asked
beginning to shake.
“Now Sylvia, there is no need to worry. I
only know of one person who could have pulled off everything needed to get in
here and back out with out setting off your alarm system while at the same time
not being heard or seen by us.”
I began to smirk, which quickly stretched
into a full smile.
“What?” dad asked while tossing the towel to
me so that I could cover my nudity.
I stood up, wrapped it around my waist and
tucked the corner tightly into itself so that the towel would stay in place
without me holding it.
I then said “I forgot until just now. I had a
dream last night that a leprechaun came to see me.”
It wasn’t a lie, at least not entirely. I did
have a dream last about a leprechaun but that was only a small part of it. I
had a dream about something totally different and weird. I had dreamt that I
was trapped inside an enormous vanilla milkshake while a funny looking
leprechaun drank it from a straw. I can’t remember how it ended but I do sort
of recall one part where I was frantically swimming through the cold milkshake
to keep from being sucked into the straw.
Tom let go a hearty belly laugh, “If Fyer
heard you call him a leprechaun!”
“Yeah I know. He would chop me up and serve
me in one of his stew pots and grind my bones to make his bread.” I chanted.
“Wait I don’t understand.” Mom said.
Tom held up a hand to stop her, “I suspect
that Fyer came to check on Simon and make sure he was ok.” Tom looked directly
at me as he said, “After all he hasn’t heard from you in a while right?”
I had to look away to keep from giving away
that I had called Fyer when I got back from The Ranch.
“If I had any concerns about this whatsoever
all three of you would be moved from this house and into a safe house. But I am
sure that none of us need be concerned about this incident.
Tom stopped talking and looked intently at me
before speaking again to me, “Why don’t you go get dressed while I talk with
your parents?”
“Why don’t you kiss my snow white...” I
started to say.
But dad had forcefully grabbed my left bicep
and gave me a hard pull. “I have had just about enough of your mouth. Now do as
you were told or so help me I will take off this belt right here and now.”
When he released my arm I started toward my
room but stopped at the entrance to the hallway.
“Ok before I go,” I said while looking from
dad to mom, “Tell me you believe me that I didn’t sneak out last night.”
“We believe you now shut up and get going.”
Dad roared.
“But I need help.” I said referring to my
need for someone to help me put on a diaper.
“Put on one of your GoodNites for right now.”
Mom said.
With a hand against the back of my neck mom
pushed me toward my room.
“And close your bedroom door.” Tom shouted
after me.
Halfway down the hall I stopped and said,
“I’m not allowed.”
In a strong fatherly commanding voice dad
almost shouted, “Simon! Do as you are told!”
So I did and try as I might, I couldn’t hear
a single word that was spoken out in the living room. It was quite frustrating.
If you overlook the monsoon in my bed and the
Mongolian-fustercluck-storm Tom brought with him, Sunday morning started out
kind of nice. The weather was positively beautiful and as the sun was climbing
it colored the sky with
Unfortunately when the temperature outside
was climbing, me and my parents were sitting inside a packed church that didn’t
have air conditioning.
I had been so looking forward to seeing
Well I’ve jumped ahead a little, let me
backup a bit.
I stayed in my room until that young agent
guy came and opened my bedroom door. What had Tom called him? Oh yeah, Morris.
“What do you want Agent Morris?” I rudely
snapped at him.
He pointed a finger at me as if to say I
needed to check my attitude.
“Yeah well you can bite my rash covered ass!”
I said in rebuttal.
In his hand was the yellow tracking device
and I knew he had come to reattach it.
“Why do I have to wear that if YOU already
have one of those chips planted inside one of my bones?” I asked him while
making sure he was fully aware that I new he was the one that had bugged me.
He gave me the evil eye as he spoke, being
just as rude as I was being to him, “Shut up and give me your ankle you little
brat!”
Oh man I so badly wanted to kick him in the
face while he was kneeling before me. Tom had said that Agent Morris had been
the one to implant the tracking chip in me. It was all I could do to resist the
temptation to retaliate.
Without another word said between us he knelt
before me, reattached the device and checked that it was working. As he was
leaving my room he turned and stuck his tongue out at me. Seriously, a grown
man, an agent for the FBI no less stuck his tongue out at me.
“No thanks I use toilet paper!” I said to him
as he closed my door angrily.
When Tom and his partner were gone the house
fell back into some semblance of normal. It was still quite early in the
morning so I decided to take Brother Vincent’s advice and get back to working
every aspect of my program. That included calisthenics, bible reading and
praying. I did all that before breakfast in my bedroom. I have to admit though
that when I was exercising my heart wasn’t really in it. It had been bad enough
doing it at camp with everyone else but now doing it alone was even more
boring.
By the time I was done doing all that, I was
in need of a change again. I don’t know when I did it but then again I never do
anymore, but my GoodNite was absolutely soaked. When I pulled it off it felt
quite heavy as I dropped it into the diaper bin.
It was then that mom walked in and asked,
“What would you like for breakfast?”
She noticed that all the wet bedding was
still lying in a mound on my bed where she had left it earlier.
“Oh I completely forgot.” She said.
I think she was about to finish with my bed
when she realized I was naked and surmised that I must have just taken off my
GoodNite.
She went right to work pulling out all the
diaper supplies she would need to get me ready for a thorough diapering. While
she was getting stuff ready I took my towel and spread it out on the bed. I
took up the diapering position on the towel to let mom do her thing.
She was applying the diaper cream when she
made the observation, “You look pale today. Are you feeling alright?”
I shrugged my shoulders and said, “I feel
fine.”
She also made an observation about how red my
privates seemed to be and applied extra diaper cream. It kind of tickled too.
When mom had me snuggly taped into a
disposable diaper she took both of my hands and helped me to my feet before
leaving with my wet bedding.
Instead of getting dressed right then I
walked out to the kitchen in just my diaper and found dad sitting at the table
reading the morning paper and drinking a cup of coffee.
“Is that your idea if an apology?” he said
when I gave him a quick sideways hug.
Realizing he must still be upset with me I
quickly said a heart lacking, “I’m sorry.”
It was clear he wasn’t feeling it either but at
least he gave me a somewhat agreeable grunt before getting up to refill his
coffee cup.
Mom walked past with her arms loaded down
with my wet bedding. She paused on her way to the laundry room to tell me that
someone had called for me last night after I had fallen asleep.
“Who?” I asked.
“The nice man who now Coaches for the
Panthers.” She said while looking to dad for help remembering his name.
“Shaffer.” Dad offered even though he hadn’t
seen mom looking his way ‘cause he still had his back to us while he doctored
up his fresh cup of coffee.
A sudden spark arched across the two halves
of my brain as yesterday conversation with BJ on the phone came back to mind.
My first thoughts and fears were that he had
called to inform my parents that he nearly hit me with his car ‘cause I hadn’t
been paying attention to traffic and had run out in front of him. But it turned
out that my fears were unwarranted. I’ll also add that it completely escaped my
notice that mom had, in a roundabout sort of way, just informed me that my old
Junior High Athletic Coach had been given my friends, Bull and Jasper’s
father’s old job of coaching our High School Football team. I hadn’t given it
much thought that the Panthers would need a new coach after their last coach
was fired for trafficking in sports enhancing steroids and encouraging all of
his players to take them as well.
I’ll add that from the little exposure I had
to Coach Shaffer’s coaching methods, I think he’d be a perfect replacement for
Bull and Jasper’s dad.
“Coach Shaffer called?” I asked.
Dad didn’t seem to keen to talk to me about
it so mom continued talking from all the way in the laundry room.
“Remember when he brought all those kids to
see you when you were in the hospital?” Mom asked in a loud enough volume for
me to hear her in the kitchen.
“What did he want?” I asked.
“I suppose he heard you were back.” She said.
Feeling a measure of relief I asked, “Is that
all?”
There was a pause before mom came out of the
laundry room, “No...”
My moment of relief left me with that one
word.
“He asked how you were and if you had any
plans to get into sports again next school year.”
Dad sat back down and started reading his
paper again.
I think that is when it clicked in my head
what mom had said about him coaching the Panthers now and I couldn’t help
wondering, if he is coaching High School Football now, why was he still
interested in Junior High athletics. I asked her about it and that is when dad
rejoined the conversation.
“He’s only filling in at the High School
until a permanent replacement can be found.”
“So he’s doing both now?” I asked.
“Doing a fair job of it too if you ask me.”
Dad said while sipping his coffee and without looking up from his paper.
“Did he say anything else?” I asked, fishing
for any clue that he’d told about the car jumping incident.
Dad lowered his paper to look at mom; mom had
crossed to the fridge and was preparing to make breakfast for us.
“No,” She said, “That was about it.”
“Did you tell him I wasn’t going back to my
old school?” I asked.
“Oh, well yes I did.” She sat the carton of
eggs on the stove as she ducked back into the open fridge, “He sounded
disappointed.”
“Would you look at this,” Dad interrupted,
“Says here that Lobsterman’s Home Furnishings is going out of business.”
“Oh no!” Mom exclaimed as she reemerged from
the fridge recesses with her arms loaded.
“They are selling off their entire inventory
at fifty to seventy-five percent off.” Dad read.
I was both frustrated and relieved that the
conversation had drifted away from Coach Shaffer. I would have like to have got
more information about his call but at the same time, if they were so willing
to leave the subject then he must not have told them what had taken place
yesterday.
“You see, it’s a sign.” Mom said to dad in such
a way as to make me think that she was alluding to some previous conversation
of which I hadn’t been privy to.
Dad groaned, pulled his paper back up and
tried to divorce himself from the conversation.
“Maybe we can go look at what they have after
church?” Mom suggested.
Though I couldn’t see dad behind his paper I
could still tell by the way he let the paper droop a little that he wasn’t
happy about the idea.
“Are we getting new furniture?” I asked.
“The sofa is broke and needs replaced.” Mom
said.
“It doesn’t need replaced. I told you I can
fix it.” Dad said almost in a growling sort of way.
“Honey you’ve fixed it twice before and it
still keeps breaking.” Mom reminded him.
I leaned past the edge of the wall separating
the kitchen and living room. The sofa looked fine to me.
“Don’t look broke to me.” I thought aloud.
I should have kept my thoughts to myself
‘cause I set off a very long and very heated debate between the two of them.
I’ll add that dad should have surrendered to getting a new sofa ‘cause by the
end of the argument mom had somehow managed to get him to agree to not just a
new sofa but also two new chairs as well as matching end tables and a coffee
table. However, I think dad felt as though he had won the argument ‘cause we
weren’t getting a new entertainment center. You know something; I think mom
purposefully made him think she wanted that too just to get him to give in to
her other demands. Boy she is clever!
The end of their heated debate came when mom
changed the subject by saying to me, “When you are done eating I want you to
get ready for church.”
That is when I remembered that I was going to
In my room I found my bed had been remade and
my clothes laid out for me to wear.
“Boy she is fast!” I commented.
I didn’t even question the choice of clothes
as I jumped into the pants and tucked the white shirt into them. I was so
excited about seeing
“My fingers won’t work!” I whined with maybe
a little too much drama.
Thinking I was still worked up about this
morning he asked, “Tom still has you rattled huh?”
“Tom? Heck no!” I said
and left it at that.
Dad stood behind me and had my neck tie
fashioned into a respectable knot in no time.
“That should just about do it.” He said to
me.
“Thanks.”
I sat in my desk chair to pull on my dress
shoes while dad walked back out of my room without another word spoken.
With shoes on and Bible tucked under my left
arm I strolled out into the living room only to find that neither mom nor dad
was ready.
“I’m ready!” I announced as a hint for them
to hurry up.
“We have over an hour before we need to
leave.” Dad reminded me.
I could tell by his tone that the morning
events were still weighing heavy on his mind. Part of me wanted to ask him if
he really did believe me but another part of me thought it better to let the
matter die for now.
Mom was walking past me to go get ready, or
at least that is what I was assuming. Anyway as she passed she told me to go
ahead and make my call to say when we were leaving and when we would be home.
“Tell them we’ll be home around two.” Dad
added.
“Why so late?” I asked.
“‘Cause we’re going out to lunch afterward.”
He glanced to mom who was still walking toward their bedroom as he added three
last words. Those words came out almost like he had vomited just a little into
the back of his throat, “And then shopping!”
When we arrived at church I hadn’t expected
it to be as big as it was. It was so immense and there were so many people that
at first we couldn’t find Lowell or his parents.
“Over there!” Dad said as he took hold of the
top of my head and pointed my nose in her direction.
For a moment I only saw
“S I M O N!”
It was actually funny ‘cause the whole place
went quite for a few seconds.
I looked desperately up at dad and he gave me
a nod which I took as permission. I nearly knocked some twig of a lady in a
flowery dress on her butt as I tried to get to
“Sorry miss!” I said as I sped past.
Lowell and I collided into one another as we
met and hugged.
“Simon,”
“Me too!” I said.
And like he does when he gets excited
He pulled my hand away and threw himself
around my neck to hug me again.
“I can’t believe you are here!” he said while
bouncing in place.
If you can imagine it; his enthusiasm at
being together again was even greater than my own.
Mom and dad finally made it through the crowd
to where Lowell and I were.
“Wanna sit in the
front?”
I looked up at mom and dad for permission but
“Where’s your dad?” I asked as the five of us
made our way across the meeting room.
“He’s in
“
As much as I had been looking forward to
seeing
“He will be back
later this evening.”
As we were getting settled Mrs. Vandoan told
us that her husband received a call late yesterday to come to
“Oh how sad!” Mom commented.
Leaving the adults conversation, Lowell and I
went off on our own verbal exchange.
Now that it is over I don’t think Lowell and
I should have had our first reunion at church ‘cause we kept getting into
trouble for whispering during the singing and the message. Dad who was sitting
to my left kept whacking me on the back of my head to shut me up. And
“Sure is hot in here.” I said to
WHACK
A moment later
Ssssshhhhh
“It’s broke.”
“What
is?”
WHACK
He pointed up to a vent high on the vaulted
ceiling and I assumed he meant the air-conditioning.
To keep from getting whacked and shushed any
more we took to passing notes back and forth. We used the backs of the offering
envelopes to write our short messages to one another. Our parents could see we
were doing it, but I think they were just glad we finally shut up.
“I got to tell you something.” I wrote.
“What?” he wrote back.
Feeling a little frustrated that I couldn’t
verbalize what I wanted to say I wrote instead, “I’m sorry!!!!!!.”
He wrote, “What for??????” and added just as
many question marks as I had exclamation marks.
“For everything.” I wrote.
“Me too.”
I still don’t know what he meant by that but
I guess it don’t matter now.
Near the halfway point in the message
something dreadful happened. I was hot and miserable. Lowell and I had stopped
passing notes ‘cause it was so dang hot. I felt a small innocent fart come out
of me and didn’t think anything of it at first but a second later I completely
soiled myself in one powerful gush. What was worse was that everyone around us
heard it.
Mom and dad both looked at me as well as did
Lowell, his mom and about ten or twenty other people. I thought my head was
going to explode from all the blood that was filling it. I couldn’t stand
everyone looking at me so I quickly covered my face with my open bible.
She then took my hand and led me out of the
meeting room. As we shuffled out of the seat I looked back to see
When we were out of the big meeting room she
stopped, leaned down to my level, stroked my cheek and said with a smile, “You
don’t need to be embarrassed. This happens to
She then took my hand again and led me down a
long hallway. I thought we were going to the bathroom and for a moment or two I
had worried about her dragging me into the ladies room but I should have known
better. She didn’t take me to the ladies room or the men’s room for that
matter. No she walked me right past those doors to the end of the hall where we
stopped in front of one of those double doors. You know the kind that is cut in
half so that the top half can be opened and the bottom half can still be closed
to keep little kids from getting out. Both halves were closed and on the upper
half was a brightly colored sign with blue clouds and multicolored balloons
with a single letter on each balloon. The sign read, ‘KIDDY KARE’. I suppose
the odd spelling was intentional.
My heart was beating so fast and furious that
I could feel the blood pumping in my ears. She reached up, knocked on the door
and a gray haired lady opened the top half of the door.
“Oh hello there.” she said to
The lady then glanced at me and her smile
faded as she realized I was not
“This is
Understanding dawning in her eyes the gray
haired lady opened the lower half of the door and invited us in.
“Thank you Muriel.” Mrs. Vandoan said as she
pulled me in behind her.
From out in the hallways we all heard a high
pitched voice cry out, “Wait for me!”
I was kind of half in and half out of the
Kiddy Kare room so I was able to lean back, using
Mrs. Vandoan’s firm grip as a lifeline to support my
weight. With my head and shoulders back out into the hallways I saw
A moment later
“(Pant)
I (Gasp) need changed (Gasp) too! (Pant)” he announced between breaths as though he were asking for a
cookie.
And much to my horror
“Would you mind?” Mrs. Vandoan asked as she
handed me off.
“Mind? Why should I mind? I’m glad to help.” Muriel said in a
sickeningly sweet grandmotherly sort of way.
I yanked my hand away from Muriel and
adamantly objected, “NO!”
I looked pleadingly to
“Gee-whiz you are such a baby!”
You know something, I think Lowell is
probably the only person on this planet aside form maybe my brother that I
would ever allow to get away with saying something like that. Heck, I didn’t
even think anything about him calling me a baby just then. Perhaps ‘cause I was
so worked up over the whole pooping myself in church and having everyone hear
it.
I can’t believe I was relieved by that
compromise. Only minutes before I had been dreading the idea of
There were two other ladies, younger than
Muriel, in the room attending to the countless toddlers and smaller children
that littered the floor like Munchkins from the Wizard of Oz. As I became aware
of all the tiny children I also realized that Lowell and I were the only two ‘Big
Kids’ in the room.
A small boy of maybe three ran up to
“What you name big kid?” a pudgy little girl
in a pink fluffy dress had asked me while tugging on the front pocket of my
pants.
“Simon,” I said without realized I had even
heard her.
“What is dat on you
face?” she asked
I knew she was pointing to my scar but I
didn’t have to answer ‘cause Mrs. Vandoan had taken my hand again and was
leading me through the Munchkins and into a small bathroom at the back of the
nursery.
“Bye Mister Simon I will miss you! Hurry
back!” the little girl shouted after us.
I remember feeling relieved when
The small room was a full functioning
bathroom equipped with two very low to the floor toilets, one low sink and one regular height sink. And I don’t know why I was
surprised when I saw one of those fold-down diaper changing stations only this
one wasn’t plastic like you see in public restrooms. It had been hand-crafted,
probably by one of the members of the church. It was constructed of wood and
metal and painted in bright primary colored stripes. For that matter the entire
bathroom was bathed in primary colors. There was also a large supply of
disposable diapers on a shelf that was hung high enough that little hands
couldn’t reach. I also noticed that along the edge of the shelf going from left
to right the diapers were labeled by size from ‘Preemie’ to ‘7’ but then
there were two more stacks, one labeled ‘Tween’ and the other generically
labeled ‘Youth’. I’d figured out that
the stack marked ‘Tween’ must be for a big girl
‘cause they looked to be as big as Lowell and mine were but where every other
diaper on the shelf was white, that stack was pastel pink.
I was surprised when
“I’m too big.” I said when I realized that
she wanted me to get up on the changing table.
“Nonsense.” She said, “This could easily support a baby
three times your size.”
With that she said, “OK, hop up!”
For the record, I did notice that she had
just called me a baby in an off-handed sort of way, but I chose to let it go
since it was Lowell’s mom and because I know for a fact that Lowell is what
they call a Teenbaby in that he fully embraces everything that comes with the
title from sleeping in a crib to sucking on pacifiers and drinking from baby
bottles. I find it oddly perplexing that he and his parents are so religious
and yet they subscribe to something that would surly be shunned by most any
church. Then again most everyone knows that
I hesitated a moment then tried to get up on
the changing table by myself but couldn’t manage it. It was just too high even
for someone my size. Oh I suppose if I really put my heart into it I could have
got up there but let’s face it, my heart wasn’t interested in any of this.
So with more than a little help from Mrs.
Vandoan I was able to mount the changing table. I felt the poop smear as it
squished between my butt and the hard laminate surface of the diaper changing
station.
“Lie back please.” She said and I obeyed.
That was the last thing I had to do. From
there on out Mrs. Vandoan did everything. She unfastened my pants and pulled them
down, lifted my shirt and began to pull at the diaper tapes.
“I see your mommy is still using the Attends
Youth diapers.” She commented.
“Uhuh?” I grunted.
“You will have to try the new diapers
“Really?” I asked as she pulled open the front of my
diaper.
I knew my head and face were still beat red
but I think they got redder when she opened the diaper and made a sound as the
stench hit her like a slap in the face.
“I think we should also tell your mommy about
Whiff.” she said as she used the front of the diaper to wipe away the bulk of
my poop from my bottom.
“What’s Whiff?” I asked.
It’s a small green pill that makes your poopy not stink.” She said.
“That’s not real!” I said to her.
“Sure it is.
“Really?” I said but when I said it my voice went
about twelve octaves higher ‘cause Mrs. Vandoan had thrust a finger wrapped in
a cold baby wipe right into my poop shoot.
“Sorry but we have to make sure you are nice
and clean inside and out now don’t we!” she said as she turned her finger this
way and that.
In an instant all the blood that had been
pooling in my head flushed out and went right to my...you know what!
BOING!
My third arm went from dead-asleep to full
attention in less than a second. It has been so long since I’d had any feelings
down there, let alone an erection that at first I was confused by it, then
happy to know that despite all the bad affects of Madam-M’s drugs, which I had
been chugging like soda pop for all those months, that I was still able to get
hard down there. However, after the space of three seconds those good feelings
were replaced by shear horror at knowing I had sprouted a rock hard boner in
front of
I suppose it was due to the sudden lack of
blood to my brain that caused me to feel so light headed. I felt my head
expanding and my brain sloshing inside my skull. The brightly painted walls
seem to fluctuate in and out of focus for several seconds as she continued to
clean my insides at finger depth. I’d have to say that Mrs. Vandoan did the
most thorough cleaning I’ve ever received as part of a diaper changing. She
worked steadily and thoroughly, making sure that any traces of poop and pee
were gone before she began applying the aromatic diaper cream. The fact that I
was sporting wood didn’t seem to get noticed by her.
Just as she had done when cleaning she
inserted a cream covered finger into my chute. She did that twice before wiping
her hands with a fresh baby wipe and then applying the powder and rubbing it in
to.
“Would you like to try one of
I must have nodded ‘cause she left me lying
there for a number of minutes before returning to finish the job. While she was
gone I tried to think of anything unpleasant to make my erection go away but to
no avail. When she returned he was still standing tall and
proud.
The only time she ever acknowledge my aroused
state is when she gently pressed my penis against my belly and said, “We’ll
just lay your little candle down.” and proceeded to finish covering him with
the diaper.
It wasn’t until I sat up that I realized just
what she had meant by thicker. I felt like I was sitting on a cushion, that is
how much padding these disposable diapers have. I’d even venture to say that
they are thicker than a double layered cloth diaper.
She said they’re called Bambino diapers from
an Internet Company and she promised to tell my parents all about them as well
as the Whiff stuff. Besides being infinitely thicker then my Attends Youth
Briefs, the Bambino diapers also cover more skin. That is, they come up higher
over my back and belly, covering my belly button completely. They do only have
two tapes per side verse the three tapes that Attends have but with only two
tapes it stays nice and snug all morning and afternoon.
I was surprised that after I was standing on
my own two feet she produced a pair of translucent, fire engine red plastic
pants, which she had me step into.
“I always keep a pair or two in
Luckily my pants were big enough to
accommodate a double thick cloth diaper so they fit over the Bambino disposable
diaper just fine. However, hiding the fact that I was thickly diapered was out
of the question. The one good thing about cloth diapers is that after a while
they kind of get squished between your legs so that you can almost walk normal
but not Bambino diapers. They start out big and get bigger as you wet.
I took my first step and nearly caused myself
to fall.
“Careful now,” Mrs. Vandoan said as she took
my hand and walked me out of the bathroom-slash-changing room.
We came out to find
“Willy, catch!”
“
Every last kid in the nursery moaned.
“Ah mom can’t Simon and me stay here? It is
so boring when Elder Abernuckle preaches.”
She gave
“Bye
And that same fat pudgy girl in the pink
dress raced up to me and held out a naked baby doll.
“You can have this if you want.” She said.
I let go of
“Thank you,” I said as I held the doll
against my shoulder like a real baby.
Tickled that I accepted her gift she giggled
and ran back to play. As we were walking out of the room I looked back to make
sure the little girl wasn’t watching and handed the naked baby doll to Muriel.
“Simon has a girlfriend! Simon has a
girlfriend!”
He made a kissy-face
and I gave his hand a firm squeeze.
“Ouwee!” he moaned.
“Now whose being the baby?” I whispered threateningly to him so that his
mom didn’t hear me.
Thankfully when we returned to the big meeting
room everyone was standing up and singing so it wasn’t as embarrassing waddling
in as it had been when we left. We scooted into the seat and both mom and dad
smiled at our return. I sighed a quite breath of
relief knowing we’d missed out on a large chunk of the boring bits of the
service and only had to endure a song or two then we’d be able to get out of
that sauna...or so I thought. There was one more surprise in store for us all.
As I made myself comfortable next to dad, he
leaned down and asked, “Everything ok?”
I nodded while checking to see if anyone
around us was looking our way.
I started to whisper something to
He then scooted himself past his mother and
was heading for the front of the big meeting room. He climbed the three steps
at the side of the stage, walked up to a short microphone stand and then nodded
to the band who all began playing.
Within just a few cords I knew the melody but
for the life of me I couldn’t place it right away. It wasn’t until halfway
through the song that I realized it was the music to an old rock and roll song
called It’s the End of the World and
as I listened to the words I realized who had originally sang it and where the
new words came from.
Talk about being blown completely out of my
socks!
It
starts with love
Young
thing -- I don’t know why
You
didn’t read the letter our Lord supplied
With
that in mind I revised this rhyme to explain to you guys all I know
Love
is a wonderful thing
Watch
the fly guys with the Benjamins sing
Watch
the countdown that the MTV plays I got ticked by the way
It’s
so unreal -- Britney and Jennifer Lo
Watch
the wardrobe -- looks like a window
Tryin’ to hold on to itty bitty clothes
You
pasted them on -- this is not true love
I
guess everything’s a hybrid breeding love and pride
In
small jealous hearts
What
it gets to be is essentially just a parody
Like
this rhyme is of
You
tried so hard -- but love’s so far
Corinthians
-- it doesn’t even matter
If
love’s too small -- you lose it all
Corinthians
-- first letter, thirteenth chapter
Love
waits -- it’s also kind
It
doesn’t envy, brag, or grow hard with pride
Keeps
things polite, doesn’t like to fight
It
denies itself, while it tries no harm
If I
have the faith and philosophy
Acting
like I was smarter than Socrates
And
every language and tongue and prophecy
I
could die and not go far
If
at the stake they burned me or
I
could’ve given every dime to many poor
If
love’s lackin’ throw me back then
Buddy,
Paul wrote that to Corinthians
It
bears everything, besides, believes and hopes, abides
That
Paul fella’s smart
Love
he said to me will eventually keep no memory
Of
your crimes ‘cause it finds no fault
CHORUS
It
likes what’s just and true
Dislikes
what’s unrighteous though
Failure
is the only one thing it can’t know
The
things that last are few
Just
have faith and love and hope
From
all these, there’s only one thing you need most
And at the end of the song all of the
instruments went silent as
I don’t know if it was right or wrong to do
in church what I did but I am sorry, there was no way I could keep my diapered
butt planted on that wooden pew. I leapt to my feet cheering and clapping.
After a brief moment everyone else did the same thing. Amazingly
That guy who preached got back up and we all
prayed, then the service ended. I met
“That was... well... INCREADABLE!”
I shouted as I gripped his shoulders and shook him.
“Why didn’t you tell us? I would have brought
my recorder.” Dad said to him as he patted
“
“Mom it wasn’t a sad song!” I whined ‘cause
she was the only one crying.
“You really think it was ok?” he asked him
mom.
“Baby you did great!” she said.
Ian shook
Right then these two young teen girls who
looked a bit older then us, walked up and butted into the middle of our little
group.
“Are you that one kid?” one of the girls
asked me.
I had time to think, “Oh brother not again!”
before
“Get out of here Candice!”
But it was the way
I guess no one but the other girl and me saw
him elbow Candice which I guess he should be glad off. No doubt about it, if
his mom had seen him do that she would have killed him. At the same time the
girls had walked up all of the adults had for a minute or two lost track of us
while they blabbered amongst themselves.
It must have hurt because Candice quickly
clutched at her aching breast.
“
He snorted when he realized where his elbow
had landed.
“Gosh
“I really don’t care what you want Lindy!”
I thrust my hand out, took hold of Candice’s
hand and shook it. My sudden action had caught her off guard and she looked
visibly stunned.
“Yep you are right, I am THAT KID!” I said
making sure I drove home the point that I was who they thought I was.
Lindy made an excited sound which was loud
enough to draw the adults’ attention back to us.
With a warning that came out sounding like
something she had said it many times before, Lowell’s mom made it clear, well
it seemed clear to me at least, that she didn’t want Candice and Lindy anywhere
near her boys. I thought crossed my mind that
At least out in the hallway and in the
nursery it had been a little cooler ‘cause there wasn’t all the hot people
helping to warm it up but inside the big meeting room it was still stiflingly
hot. It didn’t help that my loins were now wrapped in what amounted to a heavy
quilted blanket encased in plastic pants. And you would think that after the
service was over we’d be able to get out of there fast, but nooooo.
Mom, dad and
Lowell and I wanted so badly to get out of there
and get to where there might be a breeze at least, but like I said before, I
had strict instructions to stay close to mom and dad. As a matter of fact Mom
was holding my right hand tightly while
I will say that one man and woman came up to
shake hands. I remember them ‘cause the man did say something to me that kind
of surprised me. Well not surprised, like a surprise party but surprised like I
hadn’t expected it at all. He shook all the adults’ hands, then
“You are an incredibly brave young man and it
is my sincerest honor to shake your hand.”
And with that they departed leaving me
awestruck.
Dad looked down and smiled at me.
I said up to him, “Wow!”
“Do you know who that was?” Dad asked.
“That was Mark Toaliker
from Channel four news.”
“OH YEAH!” I said as I suddenly remembered seeing him
on TV.
By my reckoning it was at least another
twenty-five minutes after the service ended before we started moving for the
exit but then from across the room I spotted someone else I knew.
“IAN!” I shouted so loud that I startled
everyone around me.
Ian is my biological father but that is
really all the connection I have with him. I met him shortly before leaving
last year. He’s a really nice gay man who lives in my brothers building
downtown. Oh and he is a very good artist. There are two of his masterpieces
hanging in my bedroom. One is of my brother and the other is of me.
The last time Ian saw me I had long hair and
was sporting an awesome tan, now I have short hair and could almost pass for a
ghost. It wasn’t until he was about twenty feet away that he realized who I
was.
“Simon?” he said as though he couldn’t
believe he saw me.
He wrapped his arms around my arms and back
and lifted me off my feet as he hugged me.
“I missed you so much!” he said as he lowered
me.
He shook
“When did you get back?” Ian asked me as he
petted my fuzzy head with his fingers.
“Few days ago.” I said.
“Well I just got back into town myself.” Ian
said and turned around to wave some guy over.
As the guy made his way to us I had a chance
to appraise his appearance. He was young looking, maybe twenty but no more then
twenty-five. His hair was styled with the bangs up and the rest combed flat the
way I used to wear my own a year or more back. He was clean shaven and slightly
bronzed. But it was his walk that gave him away as another gay man.
“This is my new husband Colin.” Ian announced
and I later learned his full name is Colin Jody Winters.
You would have thought that Ian had just
announced he was pregnant the way my mother carried on. She squealed and hugged
and congratulated them both several times.
“We’ve just returned from our two week
honeymoon cruse to the
OK at first I wasn’t too keen on the idea of
Ian being married but I quickly got over it and frankly Colin is a really cool
guy. Except for his walk, which is extremely lady-like, he is ‘all guy’. He’s into all the different sports, as well as hunting
and fishing and to hear Ian tell it, Colin can’t even boil toast. Yeah I guess
I approve of Colin after all, but God help him if he ever hurts Ian!
I found out that Ian has been a member of
This is a direct quote from Colin, “If I miss
a Sunday of worship I feel like I’m cheating on God.”
I liked that about him.
It also made me like
Mom ended up inviting Ian and Colin to join
all of us for lunch today which was really cool. I sat between Lowell and Ian
while we ate at the new Olive Garden they just built up by the new highway off
ramp. The adults spent most of the time talking amongst themselves, which gave
“How was it?”
“Bad and good but mostly good.” I said as I chomped down on a deep-fried
cheese stick.
“Did you find the treasure before you got
caught?” he asked next, but he did so with his hand cupped over his mouth.
I nodded and grinned.
“Wow!” he exclaimed, “Bet Tom got it all too
huh?”
I shook my head, “Nope.”
“Yep really. That’s one of the reasons why I got to wear
this.” I said as I pulled my leg up onto my lap so that I could show him the
tracking device.
“You can’t tell a soul but before I left the
ship we had been making plans for that money.” I whispered.
“Who is we?” he asked.
“Uh, hello!? The Sister and Fyer!?”
I said in such a way as to say, “You shouldn’t have to ask that!”
“Plans like what?” he asked next.
I glanced around the table and then said,
“I’ll tell you about it later.”
He smiled and said, “Ok, but how is everybody back there?”
“They were all doing really good when I last
saw them.” I said
Then I asked him, “Remember Wambleeska?”
“So how did you hear about it? BJ tell you?”
I asked.
“So I guess you two have become pretty good
friends?” I said.
He swallowed and said, “Uhuh,
he’s a lot like you except he is different too.”
It was
I humored him with a smile as I covertly
glanced around the table to be sure none of the adults heard us.
“He also doesn’t like all the God stuff
either.” I added.
Surprisingly
“Yeah he was giving me a heard time about it
when he stayed over the other night.” I said.
“Speaking of sleeping over; I am having a big
sleepover at my house next Friday.” He cupped his hands over his mouth again
before continuing, “Just for us diaper boys.”
“Really?” I said almost choking on my water.
“Careful!” Ian said as he rubbed my chest
while I coughed.
“Went down the wrong hole.” I managed to say while coughing.
Our waitress came by and brought us our food.
I had sausage ravioli in a buttered Chipotle sauce. Ian had said it was
‘To-Die-For’ and that was enough to convince me. He was right; it was so yummy
that I ate every bite. When it was time to order dessert everyone thought
Lowell and I would be too full for something sweet. They were so very wrong.
Lowell and I split a Hot Fudge and Carmel
Brownie with a scoop of vanilla ice-cream and sprinkled with walnuts pieces. It
was nearly big enough to be a meal by itself so it was good that Lowell and I
were sharing it. Ooooh it was sooooooooo
scrumdiddilyumptious! It was so sweet that it made
our sodas taste kind of bland.
After leaving the restaurant we were all
standing outside while all the adults were saying their goodbyes. At that same
time Lowell and I were begging and pleading for permission for
“PLEASE-PLEASE-PLEASE!”
“We’ll be extra super quiet!” I told mom.
“Yeah right!” Dad said.
It was funny when Colin started helping us.
“Can they please-please play together? Pretty-please?”
“All the same rules still apply!” Mrs.
Vandoan said to
“That goes double for you!” Dad said to me.
“And you are to mind Simon and Silvia and do
what they say!” Mrs. Vandoan said.
Picking up on that I jumped in with, “Yeah
you have to do what I say!”
“Nauuh! She meant your dad not you!”
“Nauuuuuuh!” I said back.
“Yeah huh!” he said.
“Nauh!”
Ian pulled on my ear and added, “And
absolutely no arguing!”
“Exactly!” Mom agreed as I tried to playfully elbow Ian
for yanking on my lobe.
Did I happen to mention yet how horribly hot
it was? Oh man when we got into mom’s van it was like going from a sauna into
an oven.
“Air! Must have AAAIIIRRRR!” I said while
acting like I was melting.
“Going to take a minute before the Air Conditioning
starts working.” Dad said as he switched it on.
“Belts on.” Mom said.
“I have already got mine on.”
I accused him of being a suck up and
backhanded his leg.
“Mrs. Leonard, Simon hit me!”
“Oh you are such a little liar!” I said.
“Don’t make me turn this car around!” Dad
said and what really made it funny was the fact that we hadn’t yet moved from
the parking space at the restaurant.
“Oh it is so hot!” Mom exclaimed to no one in
particular.
From behind us there was a honk of a car
horn. Lowell and I craned around to see Ian and Colin passing us. We both
waved.
“I think my belly button is going to break
open!”
“It wouldn’t surprise me considering how much
the two of you ate.” Mom remarked.
We weren’t too far from the restaurant when
something bad happened. Dad was sitting behind several cars at a four way stop
when another car was backing out of a driveway.
“Dad, look at that car!” I managed to shout right
before it backed into the passenger side of mom’s van.
Mom, Lowell and I screamed and shouted right
before the loud grinding of metal against metal and the screeching of rubber
against asphalt.
“Is everyone alright?” Dad asked in a mild
panic state.
“I’m ok!” I said.
“M-my foot is stuck!”
The whole side of the van had crumpled in,
pushing the sliding side door in which had pinned
He immediately pulled his foot out of his
shoe and sighed audibly.
“I got my foot out but not my shoe!” he said.
Mom was completely turned around in her seat
facing us.
“Is your foot alright?” she asked.
“Yeah, I think so.”
Dad was already out of the van and rushing
around to the side that was now caved in. That is when I realized that both mom
and Lowell were covered in glass from the side that had been smashed.
All the people that had been waiting for
their turn to go had got out of their cars and were helping mom and us out
while dad was checking on the other cars diver.
It turned out to be a teenager who had only
recently got her license. She had mistakenly forgotten to look behind her
before backing out of the driveway which is why she plowed into us. She never
did say why she was backing down the driveway so darn fast.
What was kind of cool was that
The police came and so did one of those red
paramedic fire trucks. We were all checked to make sure no one was hurt.
Actually Lowell and I thought it was all kind of cool; well except for mom’s
van.
Oh and right after the accident happened the
girl who had backed into us, her dad and mom came running out of their house. I
felt so bad for the girl ‘cause they were yelling at
her and swearing and stuff. Sure it was dumb that she didn’t look before
backing up like that but nobody got hurt and she already felt bad enough. They
didn’t need to scream and cuss at her like that.
Everyone was fine, but man, mom sure was
shook up over it. She was crying ‘cause she loves her
van so much. It was the second time that it has been smashed up so bad. Mom
kept calling it her baby and talking like it was a real person.
After like twenty minutes Mrs. Vandoan made
the suggestion that she take Lowell and me home with her. That is when Mom
remembered that we were supposed to be home by 2:00 p.m. for me to call. Dad
looked at his cell phone to check the time. He flipped open his phone and made
a phone call but I didn’t hear what he was saying because he’d walked away from
us.
Suddenly concerned I asked with a slight
tremble to my words, “What time is it?”
Mrs. Vandoan answered, “1:53.”
“I’m dead!” I croaked and softly laid my hand
to my forehead, trying not to envision what was about to happen to me.
Dad turned back around as he was closing his
phone again and announced, “Everything is fine.”
“What?” I asked before I even knew I’d heard
him.
He looked directly at me with a cold stare
that kind of scared me.
“Here’s the deal. I just spoke with your
Probation Officer and you may go.” Dad was saying but was interrupted when
Mrs. Vandoan quickly snatched
“You know better than to interrupt like that
young man!” she said sternly.
Dad had momentarily moved his icy gaze from
me to
“You may go over but you are to go no where
else. Not to the neighbors, not to the park! You are not to cause any trouble
and you will be on your best behavior. Do you understand me?”
I nodded.
“Don’t mess up. You’re taking a huge leap
forward in being trusted here. And if you step out of line even a little bit
you’ll not be able to sit for a month. Is that clear?”
I nodded again.
“Good.” He said and then with half a smile he
said, “Now go have fun.”
Mom gave me a hug goodbye but it was clear
that she wasn’t happy about letting me go anymore than she was for her baby—I
mean her van. The accident had really shaken her up and she was feeling all
kinds of maternal feelings like she had to protect me from the big bad world.
“He’ll be fine,” Mrs. Vandoan promised mom.
Dad gave me one last bit of instruction
before we left, “When you get there you are to make your call just like you
would do from home.”
“Don’t worry,”
I chuckled and gave him a push toward their
car as I said, “Gosh Lowell! Shut up would ya!”
Lowell and I were halfway to the car when I
remembered my Bible was still in mom’s van. I spun around and shouted, “Dad
don’t let them tow my Bible away to!”
“I’ll get it!” mom assured me.
When we pulled away the tow truck was coming
down from the opposite direction.
“Wow look at how big it is!” I said and
pointed to it for
It was one of those tow trucks that carry the
wrecked cars on its back instead of towing them behind.
“Your mom and dad are going to get a
piggyback ride home.”
“Yeah, like Nemo’s
dad did on Crush the turtle.”
“Oh,” I said when I remembered which movie he
was talking about, “I haven’t seen that in a while.”
“Wanna watch it
when we get to my house?”
I reached out and bonked
“From this moment on, you will now be known
as Sharkbait.”
I held out my hands as though I were offering
up some kind of worship or offering as I said, “Welcome, brother Sharkbait!”
I fed him the next line from the movie,
“Enough with the Sharkbait.”
We both laughed.
“Mom can we watch Finding Nemo
when we get home?”
She replied with a simple, “I don’t see why
not.”
Lowell and I shared a quick glance, a smile
and then in unison we sang out, “Shark Bate! Hoo-Ha-Ha!”
Unlike mom’s van,
Boy it was a shock going from the cool air of
the car interior to the sauna outside again.
“Uuuugh! It’s so hot!” I griped as I followed
Upon entering the house Mrs. Vandoan took my
hand and walked me to her smallish home office so that I could make my phone
call.
We met up with
“Don’t even think of going down there without
getting changed out of those Clothes!” Mrs. Vandoan barked like a Marine Drill
Instructor. Actually her tone was kind of unnerving.
“I don’t have any other clothes here!” I
whined as though I were begging her not to talk to me like that again.
Speaking to her son and not to me she said,
“We still have Simon’s special shirt hanging in your closet. It should still
fit him.” She paused only briefly as she eyed me from head to toe, “And as far
as pants go, it is much too hot to wear pants today; so the two of you can just
run around in your diapers.”
I couldn’t help laughing at her suggestion.
“What’s so funny?”
“Nothing” I said.
We were both stripped in record time. I was
picking my clothes up off the floor while disappeared into his walk in closet only
to reemerge a second later holding the t-shirt baring my initials, B.S.
He started to say, “Here’s your Bull Sh...”
“HEY!” I shouted at him before he could
finish.
Laughing he tossed it at me and started out
of the room with his own shirt clutched tightly in his right hand.
“Last one down is a bugger brain!” he sang
out.
I let my clothes drop to the floor, swooped
up my t-shirt and gave chase.
“No fair you big cheater!”
That was that, for the rest of the day
Once our movie was over we went back upstairs
and
“But it is so dang hot!” I complained at that
idea of going outside.
“Uh hello! That’s why we turn on the water!”
Actually, I wanted to slug him but he did it
so hard that it hurt more than a little and I was left dancing in place while
attempting to rub the pain away.
I should have seen what he was up to long
before I actually did. Since we got home the pinch was just another of the
subtle things he had been doing to get him to his ultimate goal. And what was
his goal? Well keep reading and you will soon see.
At church Lowell had been the same Lowell I
knew and loved; now at home he was another Lowell altogether and this Lowell
seemed to have been possessed by a malicious spirit or something ‘cause the way
he acted the rest of the day was completely and totally out of character for
him.
“Dork!” I said when he moved away too fast for me to catch him.
“But I don’t have a swim suit.” I said after
his mom gave us permission.
My only response to this was to grunt in
acknowledgment.
Stupidly I turned my back on the guy;
wouldn’t you have? I mean it was good ol’ trustable
“OUCH!” I hissed when he grabbed the little
bit skin which makes up the back of the arm pit.
“What was that for?” I complained.
I grinned, “I ain’t
sure yet but give me a minute and I’ll come up with something. Oh wait I know;
how about for calling me a dork?”
I was frantically rubbing the sore spot and
frowning at him. He smiled as if to let me know he was only playing around. He
glanced over to make sure his mother wasn’t within earshot and then leaned in
close to whispered into my ear, “And if you want we can take them off.”
It wasn’t what he said, but how he said it
that made me look at him the way I did.
“What?” he asked when I didn’t say anything,
to which I simply shook my head at him dismissively.
“I have a better idea,” his mother started out
saying, “How about if you two wash my car?” she paused and waited for us to
object but neither of us made even the slightest noise to the negative.
“And then if you still want too, you can play
in the sprinkler.”
Lowell and I spoke at the same time.
“Sure we can do that.” I had said.
“Do we get paid?”
His mom smiled, “Sure, I’ll pay you with
kisses.”
“I wasn’t finished yet!”
“You’re finished now.” I said.
We took to the task with enthusiasm, and with
two of us, the car was washed and hosed down in less than thirty minutes. It
took us another ten minutes to put the bucket and sponge away and then drag the
hose from out front to the backyard. When we rounded the house we found his mom
setting out two tall glasses along with a large glass pitcher of sweet ice tea
and a plate full of frosted animal shaped cookies on a white plastic folding
table by the back door for us.
After hooking up the hose to the back faucet
we munched several cookies and guzzled some ice tea. While I was chugging down
my second glass I noticed that lying on one of those collapsible director style
lawn chairs were two nicely rolled towels.
“Your mom thinks of everything huh?” I
commented followed by a loud belch.
“Someone must have forgot to close the gate ‘cause I think the hog got out.”
“Guilty as charged!”
I set my glass down and the two of us headed
for the sprinkler laughing and shouting to each other.
I was oblivious to the way
He walked up to me, but didn’t take the towel
from me. We were standing nearly eye to eye.
“Want your towel?”
Without answering he reached out and jabbed
me hard in both sets of ribs. His fingers were only inched from my pits and I
reacted the only way I could. By screaming, laughing and staggering backward.
“NO tickling!”
“You going to sit down chump?” he asked
almost like he was challenging me to retaliate for tickling me.
I tossed the towel at his head but he caught
it.
“Who you calling a chump?”
To which he just giggled gleefully to
himself.
My response was to scowl at him and hoisted
up my plastic pants as high on my tummy as they would go.
We sat and rested long enough that my mind
had time to drift off so I didn’t see
‘CRACK’
“AAAAHHHH!” I cried out.
He got me right on the bare skin of my left
calf.
After he attempted a second strike I retort,
“Cool it! You do it again and so help me!”
I stood up from my seat, the waste band of my
plastic pants slid down my tummy and back into its proper place. I wiped the
sweat from my face, sipped a bit more tea and then went back to stand over top
the sprinkler to cool down again.
He tittered joyfully, “It went up my nose.”
There was no anger or resentment as he
leveled his eyes on me. His grin was devilish, his laugh genuine and innocent.
He dove at me and caught me by surprise; his
hands went for my shoulders and shoved me backward. Grabbed the sprinkler he
aimed it right at my face. I don’t think he expected me to counter as fast as I
did. I dropped to one knee, pivoted on that knee while sweeping with my other
leg. As he was going down I launched myself at him. The sprinkler went one way,
we the other, sliding and slipping across the wet grass. He moved like a ninja
from my grasp and took a quick second to ready himself before jumping on top of
me, arms wrapped around me, his smooth, slender body against mine. We flailed
on the grass, each of us trying to get the upper hand. Being almost equally
sized, but me having been trained to fight by Fyer it came easy for me to
slither out of his holds and turn the tables on him. Each and every time I
would knock him down he would come up smiling. And when I tried to head back
over to the chairs for a break, he pursued me, trying to drag me back into the
yard using my plastic pants as leverage. I found it annoying at first and
sharply told him tom “Leave me alone!” but his strong-minded resolve and that
mischievous grin was getting the better of me.
I found myself acutely aware of the presence
of his hands groping for a handhold. I smiled even as I told him earnestly to
give me a break, yet he tugged harder, successfully moving me closer to the
sprinkler, and I found myself laughing. I finally gave up the idea of a rest
and spun around, growling playfully at him.
He made a cute, “Eeep”
sound and sped off to the other side of the yard. I gave chase and caught him
from behind. With my arms wrapped tightly around his stomach I threw him face
first to the ground, maybe too hard. He didn’t get right back up and I had time
to make it to the chair before he was grabbing at me again, dripping wet,
laughing and taunting me.
“C’mon, baby” he said, “You just got lucky.”
When I looked at his face he looked like he
someone had dunked his head in an unflushed toilet;
but what struck me so funny about his appearance was a single blade of grass
spanning his upper lip.
“Wee-Wee
Somehow he figured out what I meant ‘cause he wiped at his face with both hands and then smeared
the mud and grass on my thighs.
I groaned inside where he couldn’t see or
hear how much he was irritating me and yet there was something about that dang
smile of his that wouldn’t let me get mad at him. When I finally got tired of
him pestering me, I seized an opportunity when he was looking the other way. I
sprang, and put him in a half nelson wrestling hold and physically threw him
sprawling and sliding across the grass toward the sprinkler.
I needed to rest. I was tired and out of
breath. But when
“I let you do that, you little baby,” he
said, “I dare you to try it again!”
“
He squawked like a chicken, put his thumbs in
his pits and flapping his arms and started to sing that chicken polka song by
clucking like a chicken and strutting around with his dark hair dripping, his
diaper hanging low between his sold legs.
He moved closer and prepared to strike.
Although, I was in no mood for any more
horseplay, his ability to miss my subtle clues to that effect was most amazing.
“We can play more later
after I take a break ok?” I pleaded.
He squawked louder and moved closer. I tried
to maintain a serious face, but his absurd strutting was hilarious and I
cracked a smile, a clear miscommunication to him regarding my willingness to
continue his game. He made his move, grabbing my wrist, and I struggled to pull
him toward me, bringing his wet grass covered body into my arms. I grabbed his
wrists and pulled his arms across his chest so tightly he seemed to struggle to
breathe. I held him captive or so I thought. His heal had found my left foot.
‘WHAM!’
He stoomped on it
so hard tears welled up in my eyes.
He shoved back against me, nearly knocking
the chair over, and I had no recourse but to stand up, place my knee in his
back and throw him back into the sprinkler. This time he didn’t fall but he did
slide on his bare feet which actually looked like fun. He slid about ten feet,
whirled around laughing and I was aware that I had, once again, miscommunicated my willingness to play.
“Come on
“Go play by yourself for a while.”
Granted I could have stopped Lowell anytime I
wanted too with just an elbow, knee, fist or foot strategically placed but really,
what was going on was just normal boyish horseplay...at least as far as I was
concerned.
“Oh please!” I jeered.
“Gee-whiz, I was just playing!”
I fired a strong frown at Lowell who was
standing directly overtop the sprinkler, allowing the sprays of water to splash
onto the underside of his diaper and out through his legs.
“Yeah and that is a load of weapons grade baloneyum!” I spat.
Thinking my only opportunity to get a break
from his hyperactive state was to slip inside for a moment.
I found his mom sitting at her desk in her
home office chatting away on the phone. She paused long enough for me to
indicate to her that I needed changed which I did by pointing at my diaper and
pinching my nose. She got the hint, smiled and ended her call. After hanging up
the phone she politely took me up to
When I went back out
“Giving yourself a nasal enema?” I asked with
a chuckle.
He looked up at me quickly and had this
overwhelming expression of guilt.
“I didn’t think you were going to come back
out.” he said almost sad enough to make me think he was really upset. I should
have known he was just bating me.
“Yeah well I shouldn’t have! You play too
rough.” I said seriously, “And you don’t know when to quit.”
He didn’t reply. He watched me as I sat down
in a chair and began to sip my ice tea which by now was just slightly cold and
watered down due to all the ice having long since melted.
“You got on a new diaper?” he stated.
“Uh duh!” I responded with spite, “How old are you
anyway? Like three?”
I had meant it as an insult but that nutty
friend of mine took it as complement. It also served to reignite his passion
for the game.
I saw it in his eyes before he had even made
any sort of move. He was like a wild beast looking for the weakest spot to
strike.
“I’m serious
“You ain’t fooling nobody,” he said, “I can tell you like it.”
“Bullcrap,” I
responded. “You best stop while you are still able to walk!”
He seemed to think on that for a moment,
staring down at his water glistening legs. Then he looked up at me.
“Sorry,” he offered sheepishly.
He hoisted himself off of the sprinkler,
water running down his torso, diaper and legs. He looked exquisite, his wet
diaper hanging even lower on his hips and between his thighs. He must have been
letting the water get inside his plastic pants.
I sighed, “And I don’t believe that for a
second either!”
He walked directly over to me and shook his
head like a mangy mutt, sending a spray of water over me. He smiled again
however, it is was possible, it seemed even more
devilish while somehow managing to be unbelievably innocent looking at the same
time. I closed my eyes and told myself not to give into his games.
He took that opportunity to flick water at me
from his fingers. I kept took a breath and let it out along with my negative
emotions. Only then did I open my eyes and looked at him. He was smiling
roguishly. To my surprise, and despite myself, I smiled as well.
With one quick movement, he stomped on my
toes with of his bare heal; thankfully it wasn’t the same foot as before.
Nevertheless, it still hurt like mad and I let out a small cry of pain and
surprise. I heard him laugh. My temper momentarily getting the better of me, I
lunged at him suddenly, but he scurried away like a fleeing bunny-rabbit. I had
no recourse than to give chase, I mean my toes demanded justice. After a couple
times around the back yard, into the front yard and returning to the back again
I caught up with him as he was trying to grab for the sprinkler to use it
against me. I didn’t even try not to slam into him when I finally caught up. I
hit him hard from behind and we both skidded across the wet grass like
Superman; him face down on the grass and my lying on top of him. When we came
to a stop I pushed myself up so that I was sitting on the backs of his knees.
‘WHAM’
‘WHAM’
‘WHAM’
With a single raised knuckle I delivered
three hard blows with my fist to his thigh.
“Let me introduce you to Charlie the Horse,”
I laughed insanely.
His face contortion in pain and he cried out
but his voice was muffed by the mud as I smashed his face into the grass. I
think he was finally getting the idea that I was though playing around. I
thought it was time to show him that he too had limits with how rough we could
play.
When he rolled over to protect his sore
thigh, I nailed him on the other with two hard punches, and he howled in pain.
Even with my hand partially covering his mouth he was able to let go a maniacal
laugh. Mixed within his cried and laughter he begged for me to stop, “Aaaaaah, no more! No more! Uncle! Oh god uncle! Please
uncle!”
“Then leave me alone!” I said.
He surrendered with, “Okay! Okay!”
“Okay what?”
When he didn’t answer fast enough for my
liking I gave him too more thumped to his right leg.
“Aaaaaaah! Okay I will leave you alone!”
I slunk back to my chair and watched as he
rolled in the grass for a while, holding his thighs, rubbing them, pulling his
baggy diaper up to look for bruises. I stared at his thighs with pride. The
blows hadn’t been my hardest, but on that muscle, it doesn’t take much to cause
pain. He was smiling, rolling to his knees, stretching his legs as if making
sure they were still working properly. He got tentatively to his feet.
“That didn’t hurt,” he spouted while smirking
and trying to hide his limp. “You’re suuuuuch a weeeak LITTLE baaaaaby.”
That ‘little’ crack almost got me to jump up
and pop him in the mouth, but I had a feeling he was seeing how far he could
push me and I didn’t want to let him know he was so close to my button.
However I did ask him something, “What’s
gotten into you today?”
“Whadda mean?” he
asked despite knowing full well what I meant.
He walked up to me, standing right in front
of me, his diapered crotch just a foot from my face. Fyer’s
voice blared in my head, “If you ever want to immobilize a guy, one solid blow
to the ol’ family jewels. The harder you hit them the
longer they will stay down.”
I stared at his diapered crotch for a moment,
and then looked up into his face.
He caught me off guard with a punch into my
left shoulder just above my nipple. It was a quick jab and he immediately did
some sort of ballerina move away from me, cackling as he did so. It hurt less
than a lot and more than a little. I was temporarily stund
by the pain, but only for a moment. Now it was genuine anger that drove me to
my feet and sent me chasing after him again. He seemed to allow me to catch him
this time after just one lap around the yard. He fell next to the sprinkler.
The cold water actually felt good on as I went down on him. I’m sure he was
enjoying it too.
This set of blows which I delivered to the
meat of his thighs were still not my full strength but they were considerably
harder and meant to be more memorable then the last.
This time he lay in the grass for a
substantially longer period. I on the other hand returned to my chair, poured
myself the last bit of ice tea from the pitcher and ate the last cookie. My
shoulder was a little sore from his surprise punch. I was just hoping that I
didn’t end up with a bruise. That would be difficult to explain if either his
or my own parents were to notice it.
I sighed hard and actually said aloud but to
myself, “If he tries something like that again, friend or not I’m putting him
down once and for all!” and I meant it too.
Sipping the now warm tea I watched him
rolling around in pain as the sprinkler rained water down on him. I
figured...no I hoped that he was not game for another round.
Sadly, I was wrong. When he struggled to his
feet again, he shook each leg as if shaking off the pain. He then did an odd
sort of jumping jack without the arm movement. He did it again and then started
wiggling both of his index fingers in a ‘come here’ manner.
“That didn’t hurt ya
know.” he lied.
I could see by the way his legs wobbled while
trying to keep him erect, that he was still smarting from my blows. And then I thought,
“What if he ends up with bruises?”
That thought made me shutter.
“Oh the little baby is scared huh?”
I figured he could talk smack all he wanted
to from way over by the sprinkler but if he came at me again he was going to
regret messing with me.
He taunted me, danced from foot to foot, all
the while slowly inching his way closer and closer.
I gave him my most serious look...this time
with no smile.
“
My words had suddenly ended ‘cause he had come at me again, but this time I was ready for
him.
Right hand to God, I caught his right fist as
he had attempted to punch me in the same shoulder. I guess
I lowered my diapered butt onto his while
still keeping pressure on his chicken winged arm.
“Simon I can’t breathe!” He cried out
breathlessly.
“If you can speak you can breathe.” I said
through clinched teeth.
Both crying and laughing he said, “No
seriously. Let me up!”
“Not going to happen.” I said calmly at the
“You are going to break my arm!”
“That’s the general idea. Oh and you can
thank our pal Fyer for showing me how to rip someone arm off while they are
still awake to feel it.”
“I should snap it off and feed it to you,” I
said, almost serious about doing just that.
There was something amusing in the way he
provoked me and then became so submissive. I couldn’t help smiling.
“Oh god Simon please let me up!” he cried but
still there was that hint of laughter in his words too.
After a moments thought I let his arm free;
however, I remained seated on top of him. He twisted his arm back around and
pulled it under his chest protectively.
I was just about to stand up and let him go
free when he suddenly gave me a surprisingly powerful bucking that nearly
separated the two of us. I only managed to stay on top of him by reaching down
and grabbing his diaper like a cowboy might grab the rope of a bucking bronco.
However, he had managed to flip himself over so that he was lying on his back,
looking up at me. He was thrashing about so wildly that I had to throw myself
on top of him, grab each of his arms by the wrists and pin him to the ground to
keep him from getting away or from trying to hurt me again.
We were diaper to diaper, belly to belly,
chest to chest and face to face. And there we were, lying in the wet grass,
water falling all around us, grass and mud stuck to our wet bodies, him trapped
beneath me, his body moving, struggling against mine as he growled through
gritted teeth. I was horrified when I felt a stirring within my diaper. I
started to jump up and run away but
Conscious of the increasing electricity
building up within my diaper, I attempted to pull my pelvis away from him while
still trying to keep him pinned. However this maneuver only served to move my
face closer to his.
I had suddenly seen what
He raised his head and kissed me on the lips.
It wasn’t long but it was enough that I knew I had to get the heck out of
dodge. My heart was racing and not because of the wrestling or the sexual
feelings we were both feeling. My heart was racing because the instant our lips
touched something came over me. It was like someone had pulled a black hood
over my head and in an instead I was gripped with shear terror! What was worse,
I didn’t have a clue why!
My body and brain had switched into flight
mode. I don’t remember thinking of how to get away from him I just remember
almost doing a handstand right before bringing both knees together and with all
of my weight behind them I brought them down into the front of his diaper with
full force.
Oddly
That had done it. I stood over
I didn’t see
When he found me I was sitting in the corner
of his room wedged between the wall and the headboard of his crib. I was
writing in my electronic journal and trying not to think about what had
happened, not between us, but inside my diaper.
I had just recorded the following passage: “I
wish I could explain—no I wish I could understand what happened today. I wish I
had the brain power to figure out how things went from a joyous reunion between
two friends to fists and pain and sexual feelings. Why does everyone that grows
up think that everything in life as to be, at its core, sexual? I wish I could
go back in time and stop the last year and a half from ever happening.”
He stopped in the door way, leaned his right
shoulder against the jam, crossed his arms over his chest and crossed his right
leg in front of the other. His head slowly tilted to the side until it came
into contact with the door frame.
“You mad at me?” he asked.
I saved what I had been working on and shut
down my journal.
He cleared his throat softly, “Do you hate
me?”
“I could never hate you.” I said truthfully.
I then noticed that he was wearing a
different diaper now and wondered how he managed to get changed without he and
his mother coming up to his room to do it. He was also cleaned up; no more
grass or mud and his hair was dry and neatly combed
with a ruler straight part on the right side.
“How long have I been up here alone?” I
wondered to myself.
Apparently reading my mind he said, “I washed
up in the basement bathroom and Mom diapered me while she was on the phone in
her office.”
He lifted his head off the door frame, “I’m
supposed to ask you if you need changed again too.”
I looked down at my own diaper. Thanks to all
that ice tea I was indeed in need of a fresh diaper.
“By the way. I cleaned up the back yard and the mess you
made.”
“What mess?” I asked.
“You left a trail from the back door all the
way up the stairs.” He said with a glance over his shoulder.
“I did?”
“I didn’t want mommy to freak out and I
didn’t want you to get in trouble for tracking up the house.”
“Thanks.”
“Do you want me to change you?” he asked.
I shouldn’t have answered as fast or as
forcefully as I did, but it came out before I knew I had thought it.
“NO!”
He looked away from me and allowed his gaze
to fall on something outside his bedroom window. It appeared that he was about
to say something when we both heard someone calling from downstairs.
“I’M HOME!”
When I reached the bottom of the stairs I
found
“Bet you can’t guess who’s here!”
Reverend Vandoan spotted me coming down the
stairs and exclaimed loudly, “Oh no! Who let that wild animal in here?!”
To which I reacted by dropping my head and
pouting. Yeah, I was only faking and he knew it ‘cause
he whacked me upside the head with his Bible. He didn’t do it hard or anything
remotely violent but I played along and acted like I’d just been hit with a
ball bat.
I did a full spin on the tiled floor, shook
my head and said, “May I have another sir?”
“Perhaps later.” He joked
Mrs. Vandoan stepped up to him, gave him a
quick peck and said, “You’re home early.”
“Wasn’t much traffic at all.” He commented.
As I was rubbing my head from the Bible thumping,
“I am so glad to see you doing so well!”
Reverend Vandoan said to me.
I have absolutely no idea whatsoever why I
started to cry. I buried my face in his neck and began to sob softly. He pulled
my face away so that he could look me in the eye.
“Are those happy or sad tears?” he asked.
I shrugged.
He then asked, “A little of both maybe?”
I nodded.
He hugged me again before standing up and
kissing his wife again.
“Hungry?” She asked him.
He kissed her once more and answered,
“Starved! They neglected to tell me they were observing a fast.”
“Why didn’t you stop to get something on the
road?” she asked him.
I was surprised at the expression he gave
her.
She grimaced, “Oh honey!”
“I’m sure I had my wallet when I left here!”
“Why don’t you boys head upstairs while and
I’ll let you know when dinner is ready.” Mrs. Vandoan told us.
“Is Simon staying for dinner?”
She grimaced, “Oh I am sorry. I forgot to
tell you Simon. I talked to your mommy and daddy a little while ago. You are
going to be sleeping over here tonight.”
Her voice went high there at the end which
set
“Whoa, whoa, whoa! Bring it down a few octaves!” Reverend Vandoan
said humorously while grabbing his son by the hair and pretending to lift him
off the floor.
“Alright, you two head upstairs so the misses
and I can make with the kissy-face.” Reverend Vandoan
said humorously.
But we didn’t go right away.
“Daddy, Simon and I were in a car crash after
church today.”
“Huh?” He said as he looked to his wife for
clarification.
Mrs. Vandoan explained that it wasn’t as bad
as
“A day or two?” I thought to myself.
I don’t know if Reverend Vandoan was trying
to do a Tarzan impression or what when he said, “Ungowa!
Up to your room! Ungowa!” but at any rate I got the
message when
He was halfway up the steps waiting on me
when I caught up to him. I grabbed the back of his diaper waistband and held on
as he climbed hand and foot up-up-up.
“Mush! Mush!” I said slapping his diapered
rear with my free hand.
We were carrying on all the way up and into
his room with how happy we were to be allowed to sleep over. The other day I
was told that under no circumstances was I allowed to be
alone with
In his room he turned to me, got right in my
face so that our noses almost touched.
“So we good or am I going to have to kick
your butt again?” he asked.
I cocked both eyebrows. “You kicked my butt?
I do believe you were the one left lying on the grass moaning in pain.”
“Only ‘cause you
cheated!”
“How did I cheat?” I said with a smirk.
“You kneed me in the nuts! That is cheating!”
I stepped around him.
“Not according to Fyer! He says that all is
fair in love and war.”
“Please!”
I looked over
I haven’t laughed so hard in a long time.
“You jerk!”
Instead he grabbed the front of his chest. He
pretended to pull his frantically beating heart from his chest and held it in
his head.
“Now just look at what you did!” he said with
a serous grin, “You scared it!”
I reached out, snatched the invisible beating
organ from his hand and popped it into my mouth. With an exaggerated, “GULP!” I
swallowed it down.
“HEY! You ate my heart!” he shouted quite
loudly.
“No eating each other!” came
a sharp bark from the door.
Once more Lowell leapt out of his skin only
this time he crashed to the floor and looked like he was about to cry!
“DADDY!” he bellowed, “You made me poop my
pants!”
I lost it. I absolutely lost it. I fell back
on the bed laughing my head off. I saw
The Reverend was chuckling too which only
made
“It’s not funny!”
Of course that only made me
laugh all the more, which earned me a missile bombing in the shape of a
yellow stuffed ducky.
Once changed
I expected the talk to be deep and profound
but all he asked was how I was doing with my program.
“Good!” I said too high which made him think
I was holding something back.
“Really!” I added, still too high.
I couldn’t stop myself from smiling. I
animatedly cleared my throat, tucked my chin and repeated in as deep a voice as
I could make, “Really!”
That seemed to appease the Reverend. He
hugged me and then pushed me backward on the bed. When I came back up he was
walking out of the room.
“I’ll send the hooligan back up.” He said to
me.
I made a loud scoffing sound, “I thought I
was the hooligan.”
I still can’t believe he said what he said
next.
“Nooo, you are a
pirate!”
I was left sitting alone on the bed, stunned
by that observation. It wasn’t until
“So did he spank you?”
“No but he said he’s going to spank you after
supper.” I joked back.
“No he didn’t!”
I laughed as I asked, “You really thought
Fyer was behind you before?”
“Oh shut up!” He said and through a balled up
dirty sock at me.
“It’s been like a year or something since you
seen him. Why would you think he was here now?” I asked.
“Hasn’t been that long.”
“What hasn’t?” I asked.
“Since he was here.”
“Wait! Fyer was here? In your
house?”
“You are lieing!”
He must have been deep in his closet ‘cause
he sounded like he was talking from inside a whiskey barrel.
“No seriously! He was here to visit and make
sure I was doing ok.”
“Did your parents know he was here?”
“Uh... Duh! Why else do you think they keep
sending me to a shrink! But that is not the point! Why was Fyer here?”
He had slipped back into his closet again.
“I already told you. He was checking up on
everyone.”
I was up on my feet, approaching the closet
as I spoke, “Define everyone.”
“You know, everyone.
All of us guys that came off the Banachelli.”
“Has he been to see my brother yet?” I asked.
“Now how the heck am I supposed to know
that?”
“Wait, didn’t you just say he was checking up
on everyone?”
“Yeah, but he didn’t tell me who he had
already seen before coming to see me.”
“And your parents really didn’t know he was
here?”
“Nope and they ain’t
going too either. Fyer told me to keep it a secret.”
He stopped talking and started sucking on his
index finger.
“What?” I asked thinking he was attempting to
hold something back.
“I just was wondering if I was supposed to
tell you.”
I didn’t mean to get mad, it just happened.
“WHY THE HECK WOULDN’T YOU TELL YOUR
CAPTAIN?”
“Boy’s! Please keep it to a dull roar.”
We decided it wasn’t a good idea to keep
talking about that subject right then. Instead we were content to play in his
room for over an hour without any idea of the passage of time. It wasn’t until
his mom called us down for dinner that we realized how long we had been
playing.
“Do you think after dinner that we can maybe
watch another movie?” I asked while following him out of his room.
I had turned my back on
I spun around, fist cocked back and ready to
let fly.
“Sorry.” He said with hands up, still
expecting a punch to the face.
We reached the bottom of the stairs where we
were met by his dad.
“Either of you need changed before dinner?”
He asked us.
It had been the first time ever that diapers had come up directly between the Reverend and I
and to be honest it totally threw me for a loop.
“Not again!”
“Ooow!
In the presents of his father there was no
way I could retaliate but I sure wanted too.
“Uh sorry I forgot!” he whined to me.
“No, that really hurt!” I whined back. I
hadn’t been expecting another hit and that one went right to the bone.
“Then stop acting like a baby! Gee-whiz it is
only my dad for crying out loud!”
I looked at Reverend Vandoan, shook my head
and audibly answered, “No sir.”
However his eyes were not on me at the
moment. They were on Lowell and man I am glad he wasn’t looking at me like
that.
“I’m good too!”
As
His mother interjected with, “I think you
should apologize to your friend for hitting him.”
I was still standing near the steps rubbing
my arm.
“Yeah well it’s still hurting!” I said as I
began to walk toward the table.
Just by the expression on his face I knew
“Better?” he asked.
“No!” I hissed, “Now it hurts and I got your
germs all over me.”
“Alright you two. Sit your padded butts and
let’s say grace.” The Reverend commanded.
I was asked to offer the blessing for the
food, which I did. After which
I finished the mouth full of chicken I had
been chewing, swallowed and then said, “I wasn’t mad and by the way, you have
to sleep sometime tonight.”
“But I said I was sorry!”
“Yep you sure did.” I said.
“No whispering at the table.” Mrs. Vandoan
said.
I never did do anything to
“I’m sorry I wasn’t there for your first
visit to our church this morning.” Reverend Vandoan said to me.
I didn’t respond right away but sat there
thinking ‘cause I honestly didn’t want to say what I
was thinking.
“What?” he finally asked when he realized I
was having some sort of internal conversation.
“I better not say.” I said with my head down.
The Reverend smiled at his wife before asking
me, “Are you trying to say that you liked Elder Abernuckle’s
style of preaching over mine? ‘Cause if you are I...”
Before he could finish I was shaking my head.
I looked at Lowell and then Mrs. Vandoan before I responded.
“Please don’t tell him but that guy was
really boring. You are way lots better than he was.”
I was glad when
Reverend Vandoan looked at his son then his
wife.
“I promised not to say anything but even
Simon’s parents commented on how bad it was.” Mrs. Vandoan said.
“Was it really that bad?” he asked.
“Daddy you are never there so you don’t see
how everyone falls to sleep.”
I then had an idea.
“Does your church record the messages like
they did at The Ranch?” I asked.
“We have a library of every service on CD or
tape since the church was established.” The Reverend said and then a light bulb
went on for him. “Ah, that is a good idea Simon.”
“What?”
“That way he can listen for himself and hear
how bad it was.” I said.
“Oh well yeah that is a good idea.”
“The singing was good though.” I glanced
“HEY!”
I chuckled and then amended my complement,
“Nah, really
“Yeah she is always so good.”
“Well how about a subject change?” The
Reverend asked, “What have you been up to since you came home?”
I was taking a bite of a buttered biscuit as
I answered, “Robbing little old ladies mostly.”
Lowell and Mrs. Vandoan thought it was funny
but the Reverend? Oooooh boy! He got this really
serious look.
“I’m kidding!” I said with the bite of the
biscuit still in my mouth.
“You had better be!” was his threatening
response.
The rest of dinner I shared bits and pieces
of the past few days. I talked about seeing BJ, Mary and my brother again.
Conveniently I left out all the negative stuff like the little spat between BJ
and I, the odd happenings of this morning and about waking up the past couple
mornings in a soaked bed and missing my diaper. Lowell and his parents also
filled me in on some of the stuff they’d been up to since I left a year ago.
“We went to
“I never been,” I said and he began to tell
me all about it.
When we were done eating Lowell and I were
both given bottles and sent to the basement where we spent the better part of
the evening watching DVD’s from their vast library of DVD’s, drinking milk and
juice from baby-bottles and eating popcorn which his mother made us later in
the evening. We watched two movies that evening. The first had been the newest Peter Pan movie, boy that was good; and
the second one was a Disney movie called The
Kid but we didn’t get to see the end of that ‘cause we both fell asleep.
I remember thinking to myself, “How long had
As he was wiping me down after having removed
my diaper he said something to his wife but I didn’t hear what he said. She
looked over and examined my diaper area. She even reached over and fondled my
boyhood for a second or two before responding back to him.
“It looks a little better then earlier but
he’s still pretty red.”
I don’t remember anything after that so I
must have fallen back to sleep ‘cause the next thing I remember I was waking up
lying next to Lowell in his big baby bed; the two of us were snuggled tightly
together; our limbs wrapped around one another like ropes.
Note from the Author:
Want to know how work on the next chapter is
coming? Want to know when it will be available? You can check the progress by
reading my blog at talkhard.5u.com.