Aden’s Alteration

By Baby Jake (2005) – Revised in 2008

 

 

 

  (Story II: Aden’s Alteration)

Chapter Eleven: A Reason for Suspicion

Chapter Twelve: A Dream Shattered

Chapter Thirteen: Thumbs Up For Change

Chapter Fourteen: A Familiar Melody

Chapter Fifteen: The Night of Anticipation
                              Part One: Getting the Goods

                          Part Two: Just Watch the Fireworks…
                             
Part Three: A Bond Pulled Stronger

Chapter Sixteen: Happy 4th of July… Baby Aden

Chapter Seventeen: A Rude Awakening

Chapter Eighteen: Summer Outro

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Notice:

 

The following story is a sequel to Aden’s Revelation. It is recommended that you have read that story first before continuing on.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Chapter Eleven, A Reason for Suspicion”

 

 

“I can do this” I thought.

 

“I can do this…” I thought, once more…

 

I glared at them… my heart was pounding. My blood was boiling. My mind was racing. My hands were shaking. I was on edge.

 

“Don’t act suspicious” I thought to myself.

 

“Just do it, and leave. No one will care. No one will think anything of it” I thought.

 

But I was standing still.

 

“…not again…” I thought, accepting my own defeat.

 

I kind of sighed, and walked away… away from that baby’s aisle, standing in front of the packs of diapers.

 

I hastily walked through the store, and picked up some random object, which ended up being a candy bar… and purchased it to make it look like I wasn’t stealing something.

 

Then, I walked out the doors of that grocery store, and into the blazing heat that awaited me outside.

 

---

 

And that wasn’t an overstatement. As I walked outside, it was pretty much the equivalent of being punched in the face. The change in temperature was incredible, from the air-conditioned store, to the exhausting heat of outside.

 

I kind of slouched as I struggled to get behind the store, to get my bike, and ride it home… which was a horrible task. The few small inclines I had to go up on my way home, which weren’t usually anything bad… were like mountains with this heat.

 

But surely, of course, I made it home. I wasn’t in the best of moods however. I sadly stomped into my room…

 

“Damn it…” I typed.

 

“What? You didn’t get them?” he typed back to me.

 

This was, of course, the friend whom I met a month or so ago.

 

“No… I freaked out again” I sadly typed.

 

“Man… you have to chill. Oh well… most people back down once or twice before they finally buy their own diapers…” he typed back to me.

 

“Yeah, yeah… I know” I said.

 

“Why can’t you just get them off of Brian again?” he asked me.

 

“He doesn’t have anymore. We used them all.” I reminded him.

 

“Oh yeah… he wasn’t a DL you said, so he only bought a bag for the dares…” he remembered out loud.

 

“Yeah…” I said.

 

“Man… I still don’t think he’s what he said he was… just a normal kid” he replied.

 

“Eh… I still have my doubts but, you know… I can’t really do anything to make sure he isn’t. And besides… I’ve been keeping an eye on him. He seems like a normal kid, anyway…” I said.

 

“Yeah, true…” he replied.

 

“I don’t know man… I’m feeling a bit depressed now. I can’t bring myself to buy diapers, and I want them bad” I whined.

 

“Awww… you’ll be fine. Just build courage. It’s not easy… It took me two tries to get my first pack of diapers last week” he said to me.

 

“Yeah… I know…” I said.

 

“Man its weird though, you ran through the streets of a town in nothing but a diaper with Brian, eventually not getting phased at all, but now you are scared to buy your own” he said.

 

“I know, I know… I guess its because I just moved here at the time, I knew no one, no one knew me… but that’s changed… people know me more now…” I said.

 

“Yeah, I can see that” he acknowledged.

 

“So what are you going to do now?” he asked me.

 

I shrugged, even though he wasn’t in front of me in person.

 

“I don’t know…” I said.

 

I thought for a moment…

 

“Maybe I’ll go and call Seth or Brian or something” I typed.

 

“Okay” he replied.

 

“Yeah… I guess I’ll do that” I said.

 

“Alright” he replied.

 

There was of course a phone next to me… it was cordless, and it was usually in my room at all times.

 

I picked it up, turned it on, and dialed in Brian’s number.

 

“Hello?” I heard over the phone. It was his mom.

 

“Hi this is Aden… is Brian home?” I asked.

 

“Oh. Sorry, no he isn’t. He and Dan went out for a bit… but I can have him call you, when he gets back, okay?” his mom said.

 

“Okay, thanks” I said.

 

We hung up.

 

“Hmmm… things just aren’t going my way…” I thought.

 

I then picked the phone up, turned it on, and dialed in Seth’s number this time.

 

“Hello?” I heard… wasn’t sure who it was.

 

“Hi this is Aden… is Seth home?” I asked.

 

“Yes he is Aden, hold on… I’ll go get him.” I heard.

 

“Thanks” I said…

 

It was a minute or so, before I finally heard Seth’s voice.

 

“Hello?” I heard.

 

“Hey” I said ambitiously.

 

“Oh hey Aden” I heard him say.

 

“What are you up to?” I asked.

 

“Not much man… why, what’s up?” he asked.

 

“Was wondering if we could do something or not” I said.

 

“Hmmm… I’m sure we can. What’d you have in mind?” he asked.

 

“I dunnonothing specific” I said.

 

“Well if you want to come over, come on over” he said to me.

 

“Alright” I said.

 

---

 

I was back on my bike, once again, as I cruised through the streets. I had gone to Seth’s house many times by now, so I knew exactly where to go. When I made it to my house, I dropped my bike in Seth’s front yard, went on top of his porch, and knocked on his door.

 

“Hey” Seth said as he opened the door… he was obviously waiting for me.

 

“You want to ride bikes?” I invited.

 

He contemplated…

 

“Sure, alright” he said.

 

Seth smiled a bit.

 

“Come inside for a minute though… I need to ask my mom for my allowance.” He explained.

 

“Oh, okay” I said understandingly.

 

“Yeah man… we can go to like a Dairy Queen or something. It’s hot out there” Seth said.

 

“Yeah…” I agreed.

 

I sat down on the couch, as Seth walked somewhere else into the house. I heard footsteps upstairs, some heavily muffled voices and a high pitched crying sound, and then footsteps coming back.

 

Seth sighed…

 

“She’s busy with my little brother at the moment” he said.

 

“Alright” I said understandingly.

 

“So… we’re going to have to chill here for a few minutes. Put on TV or something while she’s done taking care of Ethan” he said.

 

Ethan was of course, Seth’s young brother who hasn’t yet exceeded the age of an early toddler.

 

“Alright” I said understandingly, again.

 

Personally, I didn’t care too much. I was honestly enjoying lounging around in the nice air-conditioned house, considering the heat outdoors.

 

It was though, only a few minutes before we eventually saw Seth’s mom walking through with Ethan in her arms, asleep.

 

“Seth, hold on a minute, okay?” she whispered.

 

She went upstairs and eventually returned not with Ethan, but with some cold hard cash.

 

“Here’s your allowance for this week” she said, giving Seth some money.

 

“Thanks” he said.

 

And after that, there was no hesitation for us to get out, and get on our bikes.

 

---

 

We whizzed through intersections, small streets, back alleys, and obscure roads to try to let the wind cool us off. I followed him to the ice cream shop, since he knew where it was. I had a pretty good idea where it was, after all… I wasn’t really new to the town anymore. I knew where most things were, but not as well as I did with my old town. He was taking a strange route… it was longer, but I think he was just enjoying his bike ride.

 

We stopped in a parking lot… I knew exactly where we were… because there was the store I was at an hour or so ago.

 

“Here, follow me just a bit further” he said.

 

We cruised through it, until we came to another stop in front of a small ice cream shop. It had picnic benches, and there were a few people at it… but there was a bench we could sit at.

 

We dropped our bikes, walked up to the cashier, and ordered some ice cream and some hot dogs… Once we got them, we sat down at our bench, and chilled out.

 

“You hang out with Brian lately?” Seth asked me as we sat down.

 

“Not recently…” I said.

 

“Yeah, same” Seth said.

 

“What are you doing for the 4th?” I asked him, pertaining to the upcoming 4th of July holiday.

 

“No clue man… I was hoping we could sleep over Brian’s house or something” Seth said.

 

I nodded in agreement.

 

“…but I don’t know how that’ll be with those two being busy” he finished.

 

I nodded in agreement, again.

 

“This always happens though.” He said.

 

“What?” I asked.

 

“I guess they are in some summer program or something” he said.

 

“I thought you had only moved here a few months ago?” I asked.

 

“Well… yeah – I did. But Brian did say something about leaving for a little while like every other year. I can’t remember if he ever said much more than that” Seth explained.

 

“Oh” I said, never really thinking of it like that.

 

“Yeah… I don’t really care though. That’s why I never bothered asking” I said.

 

I nodded some more.

 

“What are YOU doing for the 4th?” he asked me.

 

“Me? I dunno… nothing planned.” I said.

 

“Yeah… well I dunno, if you can’t think of anything, you’re always welcome to sleep over my house” he invited.

 

“Thanks… I’ll definitely keep that in mind” I said.

 

“Yeah… that’s if Brian and Daniel are too busy. Then you should sleep over their house. Whenever there is a sleepover, it’s always a good time. I’m sure you know that now” Seth said.

 

It was a refreshing sit… very nice and fun. He and I talked about stuff, just what’s been going on in our lives. Whenever we were done, though… we began back to Seth’s house.

 

---

 

We walked in, and took our shoes off and pretty much got comfortable as we walked into his living room. We sat down on his couch, with nothing in mind to do exactly.

 

Before either one of us even turned the TV on, though… Seth asked me a question.

 

“Want to play Playstation, in my room?” he asked me.

 

I contemplated…

 

“Sure… alright” I said.

 

We got off the couch and went upstairs, into his room. It was very cool inside; his air conditioner was on… It was even cooler inside his room than the rest of the house.

 

“Aww man… can I move in?” I jokingly asked, acknowledging the cold air.

 

“This is nice” I said.

 

He laughed, and bent down to start up his PS2 and his TV.

 

“Sit down anywhere you find a spot to” he said…

 

He said that because his room very much unorganized. Clothes, books, and random stuff were on the floor all over. I looked around, and eventually just sat down on the floor, since I didn’t want to sit on his bed to be polite.

 

Despite the mess though you could tell Seth wasn’t exactly a slob. It seemed more like an organized clutter. It wasn’t my room so I really didn’t care.

 

---

 

It had been about an hour… he and I were playing for the whole time, and just having idle chat about whatever.

 

“Hang on man… I’ve got to go use the bathroom” he said, pausing the game.

 

I of course was not going to keep him from doing his business, especially in his own house, so I just nodded in acknowledgment as he left the room.

 

It was of course only me during that time. At that time, in Seth’s room… I stretched a bit, drowning in my own thoughts as I always did when I had time to myself. I cracked some joints, and as I was stretching… I guess I must’ve lost my balance but I kind of fell back onto my back real fast.

 

The clothes and stuff on the floor of course made for a soft landing. All was very soft on me… except for something. Something was digging into my back, somewhat painfully… but not agonizingly. I just sat up quickly, and of course, examined what it was.

 

I looked, but there was nothing.

 

“That’s funny…” I thought.

 

I knew for a fact something was digging into my back when I was on it… But there was nothing but clothes. So I felt around, and eventually felt that there was something under it. So I moved the clothes away.

 

And it was to my absolute surprise… it made my heart skip a beat when I realized what it was. My eyes widened, my mouth dropped, my heart stopped, and my blood began pumping. I double glanced. I glanced once, twice, three times to make sure I wasn’t hallucinating… because to my absolute shock… I was staring at what was apparently… a baby blue pacifier, with a clear silicon nipple.

 

Like I said… I wasn’t too sure if I were dreaming, hallucinating, or witnessing some phenomenal effect from the immense heat and sun outside. But I became very aware very quickly, that this was no illusion. There really was a blue pacifier on Seth’s floor.

 

And after that fact sunk in, I began to react… react with mostly questions and thoughts. But out of all of them, I quickly came to my rather hasty conclusion as to why there was a pacifier on his floor.

 

“Seth… is a teen baby” I thought.

 

No other reason to me sounded logical; only that one.

 

Suddenly my mindless gaze was stopped as I heard a door shut, in the hall beyond this room. I knew it was Seth, coming back. It was in those five seconds I had to make a decision.

 

“What should I do!?” I thought.

 

“I could tell him I found it… let him know I know he is what he is…” I said.

 

But right when I heard that door beginning to open, I tossed it back under the clothes, and acted like nothing was wrong.

 

He didn’t notice anything…

 

“Got to go when you have to go” he said as he walked in.

 

“Y-Yeah” I stuttered.

 

He smirked, and walked over to his controller. I looked over at him… and I must have been glaring at him quite noticeably, because…

 

“What?” he said to me, knocking me out of my mindless gaze.

 

“Huh? Oh… nothing” I said, lying completely.

 

“Okay… well… let’s get to playing” he said.

 

I knocked the whole thing out of my head for now. I needed to act cool… act calm. Act like I didn’t find a pacifier on his floor. Act like I was only ten minutes ago… act like we were real close friends. Which we were, but… I was feeling very strange.

 

It was an incredibly strange feeling… it was completely surprising in all ways. I mean… not to compare a good thing with a bad thing… but it was like finding your best friend on drugs. I mean, you always are cautious of such a thing, but when it actually happens, you don’t know what to do, even though you always thought over and over about what if it happened. Should you tell someone? Should you come out with it? What should you do? It was a very strange situation.

 

But I acted cool. I acted like all of the things I listed previously. Until, finally… I had to go home. It was getting late, and dinner was getting made at my house… so I went home.

 

 

“Chapter Twelve, A Dream Shattered”

 

 

“He’s a freakin’ teen baby” I typed.

 

“What!?” I saw come back.

 

“I found a pacifier in his room man” I told him.

 

I was, of course, talking to my online friend. My best one, at least. Since I first met him, I had met several others… but none of them were quite as good as one as this one. Luke, or ‘Lukie’ – turned out to be his name.

 

We had been chatting for quite a while, often nightly. We were quickly becoming great friends.

 

“That’s quite a find” I saw Lukie type back.

 

“Yeah…” I said.

 

“What’d you do?” I was asked.

 

“…I did nothing. I’m just going to wait for a bit…” I said.

 

“Man… that is really strange” I saw.

 

“Yes” I agreed.

 

“You really think he is?” I was asked.

 

“Well… I don’t think there is much more reason for him to have a pacifier in his room” I explained.

 

“This is true…” I saw Luke type back.

 

“I dunno…” I kind typed.

 

I thought for a moment…

 

“I need sleep” I said.

 

“Okay” he replied.

 

“Yeah…” I said.

 

“Good night” he said.

 

I turned my monitor off, stood up, turned around, and fell face-first onto my bed. I crawled up it, and shuffled around some, trying to get bundled up into the blankets. Even though it was the middle of summer, and my air conditioner was on low… it was something about a blanket that didn’t allow me to sleep if I weren’t under one. I guess it was the weight, or the feel alone… but I couldn’t. It just made me feel weird.

 

Once I finally got into my preferred position, I laid there still, thinking once more as I usually did when my mind wasn’t stimulated by something else. This time though… I wasn’t contemplating myself, or my desires… I was contemplating Seth, his desires, and what I found on his floor.

 

I mean… wasn’t it really all what it seemed to be? I mean, yes, it definitely was a pacifier, and it was definitely one a baby would use. However, I guess I was being cautious… but I was thinking about what if I was overreacting, and he really wasn’t a teen baby? What if it was all a misunderstanding?

 

I thought for a moment… of course. But then I shut myself up. I quit thinking about the bad possibilities, and then began to think about all the good ones. A friend who shares my desire for diapers… a friend who I can share that kind of desire freely with. Someone I can have a normal conversation with, in person, over coffee if I really felt like it. The fantasies all kind of gave me a big cheesy grin, and something to think about, until I eventually softly fell asleep….

 

---

 

“You wanna wear big boy pants?” I heard.

 

I left out an infantile whine…

 

It was I and my mother. We were in the bathroom. I was sitting there, on the floor, looking up at the toilet, which seemed very unappealing to me.

 

“No” I insisted, vigorously shaking my head left and right.

 

She chuckled…

 

“Come on Aden. You have to sometime… everyone has to grow up. You want to drive a car?” she asked me.

 

“Yeah” I said with a smile.

 

“You want to go to school? Meet a bunch of friends?” she asked.

 

“Yeah” I said with a cheesier smile.

 

“Well. These are parts of growing up” she said.

 

I listened with interest but attempted to act as though I wasn’t.

 

“And it isn’t just driving a car, or meeting friends. There’s a whole lot more that’s fun about growing up” she began.

 

“Like riding a bike… Getting a job, so you can get your own money and buy all the ice cream you want. Sleeping in your own bed…” she said, listing basic things…

 

I was interested.

 

“Now Adendon’t you want to grow up?” she asked me.

 

“Uh huh!” I said, nodding my head vigorously.

 

“Well. One of the first parts about growing up… is getting rid of those diapers” she said.

 

“Why?” I kind of whined…

 

“Hehe… only baby’s where diapers” she said, chuckling a bit…

 

---

 

And it was right there, I was suddenly back in my bed, back in my room, back in my house, back in my thirteen year old self, rather than being a young toddler, in my old house, in my old nursery.

 

I was completely awake. The sun had risen, so I got a good night’s sleep. I was lying there, staring at the ceiling, completely dumbfounded by the dream… and wondering how many times it had been that I’ve had that dream.

 

I sat up, contemplating my dream. I was getting aggravated. This was the one of many times I have had this dream now, but it wasn’t the same every time. Details were changed; my mom and I were in a different area sometimes, etc.

 

It was all very interesting, but I wasn’t in the mood to continue thinking about it any further. My stomach was growling, indicating I was very hungry… So I knocked myself out of my little trance, and stood up, and walked downstairs, into the kitchen.

 

---

 

“I don’t know what it is man” I typed.

 

“That is pretty weird…” Luke typed.

 

“Yeah… it’s been like a dream that repeats itself over, but isn’t the same twice” I typed back.

 

We were, of course, discussing my dream.

 

“I don’t know what it could mean… I mean it definitely comes from your need for diapers and such, but it seems to have more depth to it than that” I read.

 

“Yeah… it feels like more than just my mind dealing with that” I replied.

 

“Like how do you feel?” Luke asked me.

 

“When?” I asked.

 

“After the dream… during the dream…” he said.

 

“Well… after words… I feel really odd. It gives me a strong emotion of like… it’s really hard to explain. It feels like I’m missing something big” I said.

 

“And during?” he asked.

 

“…it feels like I have everything I ever wanted” I said.

 

“Hmmm…” I read.

 

“I mean, in the dream, everything seems so real and clear. Nothing I can think of looks or seems out of place, nothing seems wrong in anyway. It all seems so clear and real, it actually confuses the hell out of me when I wake up” I said.

 

“I see…” I read.

 

“I’ll give it some thought, you know? I think about it, tell you what I come up with. But I have to go for now” I saw.

 

“Alright man…” I typed.

 

He logged off, and so I was left alone to contemplate further. However, I didn’t think about my dream any further. I felt it was unnecessary to think about something that wasn’t real; when there was something else that was very real awaiting my action: Seth’s and his pacifier.

 

“What am I going to do?” I thought.

 

This was one of those things you always wanted to happen but never thought it would, so when it finally did, you were completely taken off guard, like I was now. I was thinking and thinking… until finally I came to a conclusion that I would like to talk to him about it… later on today…

 

So I reached over, and grabbed my phone, eager to call him… I dialed his number, and placed it against my ear.

 

“Hello?” I of course heard. It was Seth.

 

“Hey Seth” I said.

 

“Oh hey Aden” he responded.

 

“What are you up to?” I asked him.

 

“Nothing much at all honestly… sitting around, was just sitting around in my room, playing some games on my PS2 as always…” I heard him say.

 

And then and there, I had a mental picture of what he probably was doing… He was probably sitting there, on his bed, with his pacifier in his mouth, and maybe with a bottle, too…

 

“Yeah, I’m pretty bored” I admitted.

 

“Well… come on over if you can, you’re always welcomed on over” he said.

 

I felt touched…

 

“Thanks, I guess I’ll be on my over then” I said.

 

“Alright, well… I’ll see you” he said.

 

I hung up the phone, and began to get dressed. I quickly threw on my clothes, and even threw on my backpack (I brought it with me pretty much everywhere lately) – and left my house for Seth’s.

 

---

 

It was a longer walk to his house than usual. This was of course, all mental… I got there in only a few minutes, but those minutes stretched on for a lot longer than that to me. This is because I was doing a lot of thinking… and decision making. I was thinking about how I was going to reveal to him, my discovery. Should I throw hints, or just say it to him straight out? Should I admit to him my side as a diaper-lover, first, in case he thinks I won’t accept it, or let him come out first? How was I going to set the mood? Should I even set the mood? Maybe I should just slowly transition into a conversation about this kind of stuff…

 

There were a lot of things on my mind of course. Every scenario I thought of I tried to make a plan for it, to be prepared. But there simply wasn’t enough distance between his house and mine for me to prepare completely, because before I realized it, I was standing in front of Seth’s house once again. I walked to the door and knocked.

 

The door swung open like it usually did, and it was of course Seth answering it, since he was expecting me. He greeted me inside, and I of course fronted a fake attitude, trying not to act like there was something on my mind. I smiled, and acted eager to hear what he did last night… and its not like I didn’t care, there was just other things on my mind that I wanted to get out as soon as I possibly could. I was just waiting for that opportunity that there would be silence, for me to somehow spark up a conversation.

 

And then it came.

 

---

 

“Yeah man… I don’t know what Brian and Daniel have been up to. But like I said, you’ve got to really seriously try to sleepover their house if you can for the 4th…” he said.

 

“Yeah, I really want to” I explained.

 

“Maybe we could do some more dares or something” he said.

 

My opportunity has arrived…

 

“Yeah, we haven’t done those in a while” I said.

 

“That’s true, I don’t know why.” He said back.

 

“I don’t know… We’ve had a few sleepovers this summer so far, but not as many as I’ve been hoping. The whole dares thing kind of ended after our first summer sleepover, you remember?” he explained.

 

I thought about what he meant…

 

And it was actually true. It was about mid-June, the school year had finally ended. It was actually the Friday that school ended on that we slept over Brian’s house. We were all sitting in Brian’s and Daniel’s room, all contemplating what to do next with our ‘diaper-dares’.

 

However, as we all discussed… the magic had kind of faded for all of us. I, of course, was staring at Brian the whole time, watching his moves, examining him for any signs of being a diaper-lover. But like I said, the magic had faded. None of us had any interest anymore to do them. Our imagination had faded; we were completely and utterly bone-dry of any ideas.

 

And it was that night that would end our dares for the month so far. There hasn’t been any diaper-streaking through the night or anything like that, since that night. And the dares that the night featured weren’t very spectacular or really worth any of our time anymore. So they stopped…

 

“Yeah, I see what you mean” I concurred.

 

He shrugged, showing off his apathy as usual. I felt my opportunity to start a conversation beginning to slowly vanish… So I jumped on it as fast as I could.

 

“So how come we enjoy doing those dares so much?” I asked, spitting out the first thing I thought of.

 

“I don’t know… I just did them because it was fun, and something about them made it difficult for us to do them.” He explained.

 

“Yeah” I answered.

 

“I don’t know its something to do. Not much to do here, you know? So… dares of any kind are just a way to have fun” he admitted.

 

“Yeah, me too” I said.

 

“So Seth” I began…

 

“What’s up?” he asked.

 

“What’s your opinion on people’s inner-differences?” I asked… perhaps being a bit too vague.

 

“What?” he asked completely confused.

 

“I mean like, what’s your take on people who are different because they like more… strange things?” I asked.

 

“Hmmm… I don’t really know what you’re getting at with this… but I guess I don’t really care. You are who you are, just mind your business and I’ll mind mine” he said.

 

I nodded to show I understood.

 

“Why do you ask?” he asked me.

 

“I don’t know, was just a question. Trying to start a conversation…” I said.

 

“Ah…” he kind of said.

 

“I was just wondering, you seem like a guy who’s pretty much non-caring about stuff.” I said.

 

He shrugged.

 

“Yeah…” I said…

 

“Hey Seth” I said.

 

“What’s up?” he said again.

 

“How come you had a pacifier under your shirt last night?” I asked.

 

Now maybe I went about it the whole wrong way… but I couldn’t think of any way to put it.

 

“W-what?” he asked.

 

I suddenly came very clear that he was now caring about something. His eyes got larger, and he sat up a bit…

 

“A pacifier” I said.

 

“A little, baby blue pacifier was under that shirt… right there” I said, pointing at the shirt that I didn’t notice was still lying there, on his floor… until now.

 

He looked a bit shocked, but not TOO shocked. Not as shocked as I would’ve been if someone were to ask why I had diapers under my bed.

 

He looked at me, and slowly bent down, and pulled the shirt away. And like I said, there it was. There was the blue pacifier I had mentioned to him only a moment or two before, laying on the floor. He picked it up, and looked at me… and looked at it again with a strange look on his face.

 

“Dude” he said.

 

I felt uneasy… I felt like I had gone about it the wrong way. I was looking at him, as he had a strange expression on his face…

 

“Man its cool I don’t care” I said.

 

He shook his head…

 

“No really, it’s fine. I…” and it was right there. Right there that I was cut off. I was cut off by Seth’s next words, which almost made me have a stroke from absolute disbelief.

 

I mean… to think I almost said “I – like to wear diapers, too” to Seth. However, I was luckily cut off…

 

“This is my little brother’s pacifier that he’s been crying and screaming about for the past like three days about” he said.

 

My heart stopped.

 

“…w…what?” I said, feeling a sudden lack of air in my lungs.

 

“Yeah!” he said, with his expression slowly transitioning into a bit of joy rather than shock.

 

“Man! Now I can SLEEP!” he said with happiness.

 

I couldn’t breathe. My heart was racing so damn fast I couldn’t see straight. I thought I was going to die from the blood rushing through my veins at off-the-charts pressure. I had complete, full-body paralysis. I couldn’t move from shock.

 

Why? It wasn’t because I had jumped the gun, and assumed something that was apparently not the real thing going on. It was because I was two words short of admitting my loving diapers to a good friend. Thoughts and flashes of him laughing at me, and telling Brian and Daniel, began flooding my head.

 

“Man… what could I have done…?” I thought in complete disbelief.

 

He looked at it with a small bit of joy, and then exited the room to go give it to his mother, while I sat there on his bed, completely motionless. He soon returned soon, without the pacifier, and sat back on the bed. He seemed a bit overjoyed… and I tried to maintain my normal attitude… which was incredibly difficult.

 

“Man… you have no idea… I CAN SLEEP tonight!” he said.

 

I faked a laugh…

 

“Yeah man… Ethan like never stopped crying over that thing disappearing. My mom’s been searching the house up-and-down… don’t know HOW it ended up in my room… My brother must’ve dropped it in here when my mom was carrying him through or something” he said.

 

I nodded in agreement.

 

“So what’d you think? Think I was suckin’ on it and stuff?” he asked me, with a bit of a smile. My heart skipped a beat.

 

I shrugged and smiled and laughed a small bit, all of which were fake.

 

“I can only assume something by how it seems” I said uneasily.

 

He looked at me at me with a bit of a sly smirk. I looked away feeling completely and utterly embarrassed.

 

“Nope…” he said.

 

“It’s my brother’s…” he elaborated further…

 

I nodded to show I understood.

 

---

 

I had exited that house one different person from that of which I had gone into the house as. Coming back home was an even longer experience than when I was walking from it. When I was going to Seth’s house, I was dreaming of something that was truly a great dream: a friend that was like me, in a way that you’re only lucky, to have a friend like that.

 

But now I had more things on my mind. The narrowly escaped encounter with a horrible, ugly mistake I would’ve regretted making for… probably the remainder of my life as a teenager, and then some. I was only two words from saying “I – like to wear diapers, too!”

 

And what if I did? That’s what was filling my mind. I had pictures, and thoughts, and in a sense: ‘daymares’. I was watching a movie in my head, where I said it, and he began to laugh at me as he explained to me the real reason behind his having a pacifier in his room. He would then laugh at me more, call me a freak, and kick me out of his house with no welcome back.

 

Then he would call my other best friend, Brian, and tell him that, and then Brian’s brother Daniel. Then every single day in school, and often times after, they would all taunt me, and make fun of me, and bring me to the edge of a mental meltdown as my head practically explodes from the overwhelming sense of guilt, humiliation, depression, rage, confusion, and regret. And that’s how it would be, for the next decade. Things would never be the same.

 

I was lucky… very, very lucky indeed. I could’ve made such a fool of myself right then and there. These images of me as someone I never want to be, which is an anti-social, constantly depressed, anxious, and enraged teenager, made me feel all-too uneasy.

 

As much as I tried to convince myself they weren’t real, and how lucky I was, it didn’t work. I WAS lucky… I might not be that lucky again.

 

I had reached the intersection that I would normally walk down to go to my house… and when I was about to cross the street to go there, I felt something in me just kind of… aching. I didn’t want to go home yet. So instead, I walked the other direction across the intersection. I walked for a small while, contemplating my near-fatal mistake encounter.

 

I eventually reached a small park, however. It was empty, not a single soul was around. This felt like the place to be… so I walked through it a bit, and found a nice, shady tree to think under.

 

There was a bench under a tree, so as I sat there, and began to of course further taunt myself over my horrible almost-mistake, constantly battling over myself in my head. On one hand, I almost made a terrible mistake. On the other, I was telling myself it was an encounter that I gladly passed, and shouldn’t worry about it because there isn’t anything to worry about anymore.

 

But something was still bothering me, even though the calm, quiet isolation in the park had calmed me down some. At first I thought it was over the whole incident… but upon further mental examination, it hit me. All of those thoughts, dreams, and fantasies of me and my best friend having a gleeful time in diapers, had come to a shattering end that was so hard to take I couldn’t breathe.

 

I felt alone, once again. I felt that dark, disgusting, wretched sense of being alone slithering its way into my soul like a virus, seeping its way into me, slowly hollowing me out with the fact that I am completely by myself on this whole, big deal.

 

I slowly felt myself getting this weird, sinking sensation. I felt like I was falling, but I knew for a fact I wasn’t. I mean… it felt like I was falling at such a fast pace, I couldn’t figure out which way was up. But incredibly, at the same time, I have never felt so damn grounded in my life. Things looked, and seemed, so clear that it all made sense. But strangely, simultaneously, I felt like I was sinking.

 

I couldn’t take it anymore. I couldn’t stand the fact that I was completely alone as a diaper-lover here. But then, my hysteria was slowly fading… as I caught myself, when I noticed what I was exactly thinking and doing.

 

I began to look at myself then and there and see what I was doing. There I was, sitting all alone on a bench in the park, on a cloudy day, thinking over and over about how I almost made a horrible mistake, when I should be thankful that I hadn’t done that mistake. And the whole alone thing… though it was really bringing me down… looking at myself and seeing how depressed I was feeling over it all… there was nothing I could do but just tell myself to get over it.

 

Being alone as a diaper lover, or teen baby, is a common thing. It takes years for people to find other friends in person that are the same like them, some only meet the people they have met online because there ISNT anyone to meet around them. Maybe I was going to be one of those people… and as that thought grew in my mind, the depression and confusion, and shock from the whole situation was beginning to fade. It had been about a half hour or so that I was sitting there thinking.

 

And suddenly, I rose up from the bench, suddenly accepting the fact that I’m alone. As little as I wanted to, I had to. I took a look at where I really was, as in my location in the town, not the park. I looked at the street, and noticed something….

 

I was near the store. I was near that supermarket that I was already at one today. I suddenly felt the want… the need to have them. I guess the whole mental war that was going on, and was still partially going on (I was just more calm about it), made me want to just settle down in my room with a diaper. I walked from the park and continued walking down the street, towards where I knew it would take me. And right then, when I had reached another intersection that would either take me home, or to the store… I felt in my pocket. And there it was… the money I needed. I was set to go. I was completely prepared. The money was in my pocket, the backpack was on my back (I was fortunate to put it on just in the nick of time), and the determination and motivation was in my head. I was set to go.

 

So with that thought… I looked away from the path that would lead me home, and down the path that would lead me to a better place right now: the store with the diapers that I would take home and use because they are what I required to be happy again.

 

 

“Chapter Thirteen, Thumbs Up for Change”

 

 

My heart was racing, and my veins were burning as if they were pushing fire. I was in that familiar aisle once again. But this time, I was walking out of it. I was walking out of that aisle, not empty handed. I was doing it. I tried to not pay attention as I put the bag of diapers on the counter, waiting for the cashier to ring me up so I can escape that store and go home, putting this whole anxious situation behind me.

 

“That’ll be 14.99” the lady said to me.

 

I tried not to look at her face as I handed her the money. I didn’t want to see the look of confusion or shock on her face as she was putting my diapers into the bag.

 

“Thanks…” I spit out as I took the bag, and put it in my backpack.

 

She handed me my receipt, and was I was on my way. And then, it began to sink into me. I did it. I just did it! I finally bought myself my first bag of diapers that are ALL mine! I slowly grew a smile as I exited the store, and walked outside…

 

It was raining when I had come out of the store, only a little bit though. However, I didn’t care about getting wet… not like I had a choice anyways. I was too damn happy with myself all of the sudden, and I mean… I had every right to, too. I was, yes, very depressed earlier today… but I used that as motivation to conquer a common fear by many diaper-lovers and teen babies… and now I was bringing home my own, self-purchased bag of diapers to wear, and use to my heart’s content. I was definitely satisfied with myself, and with what the day had for me.

 

It was only a few minutes of me walking in the rain, before I got home, only a bit damp from the soft rainfall. I announced that I was home to my mother, and proceeded to my room, very eager.

 

I shut the door, and locked it, while simultaneously tossing my backpack onto my bed. I smiled gleefully as I walked over to my bed, knowing a pack of my own diapers were awaiting me. I slowly picked my backpack up… and unzipped it, and let the store-bag drop onto my bed, with a ‘thump’. I reached in, and pulled them out… the diapers, of course. I didn’t open the bag yet though.

 

I was busy glaring at the package… feeling the latex-like material that wrapped the individual diapers together. I squeezed it a bit, just to assure myself that there really were diapers inside there.

 

My passion for them grew every day. Ever since that day in Brian’s bathroom, that seemed liked years ago (but was in reality, only several weeks ago), my need for diapers had grown stronger and stronger. Starting weak at first, with indescribable feelings and erections that seemed mysterious, but gradually transitioning to more incredible feelings that seemed all the more mysterious, yet at the same time… so right. And by now, it wasn’t just about the want to masturbate. They were more than just something to assist me in getting off… they seemed like something that has been missing in my life for so long, and I wasn’t even aware. They seemed like, and felt like; a missing puzzle piece that I wasn’t aware was lost… but once was there, you can see the whole picture. The puzzle felt complete, where as before, it only seemed like it was.

 

Though the origin of these feelings were unknown… I wasn’t concerned about the source. It was just strange, because the sheer feeling these gave me… is indescribable. It’s like… it’s like when I’m in a diaper… something comes over me. A sense of calm, peace, and comfort, sweeps over me. And these feelings come from inside of me… deep inside of me. I know they do…

 

I stopped contemplating, for the fact that I now had calm in my hands, made me too eager to care anymore. I tore open the bag, and slowly (quietly) pulled a diaper out. I laid myself onto my bed, taking my damp rain-covered pants off, and let them drop to the floor. I then pulled my boxers down, to my knees, so I was now in the changing position half naked. It got me slightly aroused… I felt myself growing a slight erection, as expected.

 

However my intentions were not to masturbate… not yet anyway. I felt the need to really enjoy my diaper longer. I took a diaper from the package, unfolded it, and slid it under my butt. I pulled the front over my stomach, and taped it together tightly around me. It felt secure, and so did I…

 

I sat up as it crinkled underneath me. For the first time in a long while I felt great joy… Sure, I’ve felt happy in the past month, of course. But this was bliss, as wearing a diaper always was to me.

 

I stood from the bed, only to sit down again, only this time in my computer chair. I moved the mouse to deactivate the screensaver, and was humbly greeted by a few messages left for me to read. They were by fellow diaper-lovers and teen babies also. There were only about 3 messages… I added the users that messaged me, and looked for my best friend online.

 

---

 

“Hey” I typed.

 

“Oh hey man” I saw Lukie reply.

 

“What’s up man?” I typed.

 

“Oh same old, same old… you?” he replied.

 

Sittin’ around in a diaper” I typed.

 

“Oh! You got them finally?” he typed back.

 

“Yes, finally. I got a bit of a burst of… motivation.” I said, choosing to avoid the complex explanation as to why I got that motivation.

 

“I see… well. Its good you got some finally. How’s it feel to be in a didee again?” he typed.

 

“Feels good =P” I typed.

 

Haha…” he replied.

 

“You wet yet?” he asked.

 

“No, not yet, I just put this thing on” I explained.

 

“Oh, I see…” he replied.

 

“What about you? You wearing at all lately?” I asked.

 

“Nah… I haven’t had the free time as of late. Been busy as hell” he typed.

 

“Yeah? That’s weird man… why’s everyone so busy? I guess it’s because of the 4th rolling around soon” I typed.

 

“Hmmm? What do you mean?” he asked.

 

“Oh, I just think it’s weird. Your busy, my friend Brian and his brother Daniel are busy, etc.” I typed.

 

“Aye… that is a bit peculiar. I’ve been doing just random stuff. Mom and Dad have been dragging me all over the place nonstop, been arranging stuff for the upcoming holiday… I’ve just been a more outgoing person than usual” he explained.

 

“Yeah… I can see that…” I said.

 

“What about you? Hang out with that Seth kid today?” he asked.

 

I looked at his text and the whole day flashed back to me, in an instant. I wasn’t fazed by the whole thing anymore… I had pretty much gotten over it… to a point. I was yes, still very disappointed, but now that I was in a diaper and was talking to one like me, I wasn’t feeling as lonely anymore.

 

“Yeah, I was with him earlier today” I admitted.

 

“Oh? How’d that whole pacifier thing turn out?” he innocently asked.

 

“Eh… honestly… pretty embarrassingly” I admitted.

 

“Hmmm? Why’s that?” he asked.

 

“Well… turns out it wasn’t his pacifier. It was his brother’s. And since Seth isn’t stupid, he obviously knew I was thinking it was his. But he was cool about it… either that or I was just that embarrassed looking. Either way, I felt like a dumbass” I admitted.

 

lol… sorry. I just find the way you put the end there a bit amusing. Well that sucks man; I thought you had a TB friend, too. Sorry it didn’t turn out that way” he said.

 

“Yeah… it’s alright. Guess I’ll just have to deal” I said.

 

“*nods*” was his reply.

 

“I wasn’t taking it as well about an hour ago as I am now” I hinted.

 

“Hmmm? Why, what was up?” he asked.

 

“Oh… nothing was going on. I guess the immense disappointment and the embarrassment, and the sudden break-back to being alone here as a TB/DL, made my head go on meltdown status for a few minutes” I explained.

 

“Wow. Yeah, I guess that’d happen” he said.

 

MmmmHmmm…” I replied.

 

“Well at least you’re diapered now and happy” he typed.

 

“Yup” I concurred.

 

“Hehe…” he typed.

 

“Happy… and wet, too!” I typed.

 

And I wasn’t exactly lying.

 

Somewhere during our conversation, I had wet my diaper… well… flooded more like it. I squeezed the front of my diaper and felt the squishiness of it, and the warmth.  I felt my erection making a very quick return… and this time I felt I couldn’t resist but to take care of it vigorously.

 

“Hehe… wet your diaper huh? When you going to change?” he asked me.

 

“I might right now actually… it’s gonna leak” I typed.

 

I was of course lying, but I wasn’t going to type “I have a huge erection right now. I am incredibly aroused and I feel if I don’t masturbate my dick will explode”

 

brb” I typed.

 

lol, okay” he typed back.

 

I stood up from my chair, only to lay myself back down back onto my bed. I felt the outside of my diaper again… and I could feel bulge from my erection. I slowly, but hard, rubbed the outside of my wet diaper, which was also rubbing hard against my erection, feeling pretty damn good.

 

It was a few minutes before I couldn’t take it anymore though. I tore the tapes from my diaper, and unfolded the front down. I gripped my penis and began to slowly pump, but that slow quickly began to grow in speed. I tried my hardest not to moan or make noises, since I of course, didn’t want my mom to hear.

 

The waves of pleasure washed over me in the forms of a strange heat sensation. It was difficult to explain… but I’m pretty sure you know exactly what I mean. I stopped for only a minute, but only so I could spit into the palm of my hand… and then I continued to masturbate, now more vigorously.

 

Now I was feeling the waves of pleasure shoot through my body, the wetness of my spit lubricating my erection as I was pumping it with a tight grip. I was really feeling… well… horny. But it was during this time and during this session that I did something I’d have never imagined myself doing.

 

We all know when you are in this much ecstasy, your body and mind craves more. Your mind is only focused on reaching that orgasm, and will often to do something stupid or unexpected when you’re… “distracted” like I was now.

 

As I was masturbating vigorously with my hand, something compelled me to take my remaining hand, and take the thumb… and put it in my mouth. Of course I thought of it weird at first, but I didn’t care. I took my thumb and began sucking on it.

 

And it continued to, for another few minutes until I finally began to reach my climax. As my load was finally shooting out a bit, I began to realize that the thumb in my mouth was honestly the only thing keeping me from grunting and moaning loud enough for my mom to hear it a few rooms over.

 

But after a few moments I stopped… my ‘session’ was over with, and now I was left there, lying in my bed with that tingling sensation all over. And as my head began to clear I was left there wondering why I had my thumb in my mouth.

 

---

 

I slowly stopped sucking on it, and took it out of my mouth with a feeling of confusion. I wasn’t upset; I wasn’t feeling that guilty feeling like I did when I first masturbated doing something different… I was just confused.

 

The crazy part was next… As my mind kind of reset itself after my after-orgasm-shock went away, and my mind had cleared… I wanted to continue sucking my thumb. It was calling to me… so I answered. I took my thumb and placed it back into my mouth, and began sucking… and an immense sensation came over me like a tidal wave. It wasn’t arousal, of course. It was comfort. It was an incredible wave of comfort, and a sense of safety that just came over me like a blanket.

 

I wanted to keep doing it. This feeling was like a calling from deep within my mind… that thing that called for me to wear, and wet my diapers… it was calling for me suck my thumb.

 

“What does this mean?” I wondered as I began to more contently suck my thumb.

 

“I guess this means… I’m…” I began to think…

 

“…a teen baby”

 

---

 

This was of course no problem. I have no problems with the teen baby, or the adult baby, community that I’ve neighbored with as a diaper-lover. But to think I was actually one was just so… weird. I wouldn’t even think that I was one… the thought of being babied; being regressed forever… it just seemed unappealing.

 

But then again, I never really gave it much thought… and I guess the thumb in my mouth made me kind of blur the line between being a diaper-lover and a teen baby. I was confused, yes, but at the same time, so damn calm from this soothing sensation that my thumb was providing me.

 

I took my thumb from my mouth, and slowly sat up. I had things to do; I couldn’t just sit here thinking for an hour. I had a very wet diaper lying there, and a hand to wash. I looked at my thumb one last time… but put my hand down and proceeded to clean my room and myself up after only a moment.

 

---

 

“Luke I’ve got a question” I typed.

 

“What?” he replied.

 

“How did you know you were a teen baby?” I asked.

 

“Hmmm… good question” he replied to me.

 

“Alright… I don’t know how exactly I knew I was one. It was something that was kind of always there. When I was about… hmmm… 12, last year, I kind of began to get a bit turned on by babyish traits and things. It’s difficult to explain. I always wanted to be in a diaper again and be sucking on a pacifier and things like that. Then eventually they kind of evolved into a some-what fetish. But as I began to read about others like myself, and act upon these feelings (rather than masturbating, I had gone out and bought a pacifier and things like that), the less they aroused me at times. It’s really hard to explain man. The feelings always were.” He typed.

 

 

“Ah…” I typed.

 

“Now, it’s not really a fetish at all. More like a lifestyle. I have a small collection of baby stuff and some diapers, and whenever my parents aren’t home… well I guess you could say I play dress-up” he admitted.

 

“Why is it you asked?” he asked me.

 

“…I think I am one” I admitted.

 

“Oh! Why do you think that?” he asked.

 

I explained to him the whole thumb-sucking thing.

 

“Ah… I see… that IS kind of a clue. I don’t know what to tell you. Just if it comforts you, keep acting” he said.

 

“Yeah… the more I act on the feelings, the more things I discover about myself. First it was diaper-wearing, then diaper-masturbating, then diaper-wetting, now thumb sucking…” I said.

 

“Heh… I don’t know what to say man.” He said.

 

Suddenly there was a ringing sound coming from next to me. It was the phone and it also pretty much broke me from my trance you get in when you’re on the computer for too long.

 

“Oh, hold on. Phone’s ringing” I typed.

 

---

 

“Hello?” I asked, putting the phone up to my face.

 

“Hey Aden” I heard. It was Brian!

 

“Oh hey man!” I contently said.

 

“What’s up?” he asked, just as happily.

 

“Nothing much at all man… just been sitting here bored. Where have you two been lately?” I asked.

 

“Huh? Oh, me and Daniel. We’ve been places. We’re always going places around this time. My dad takes us camping in a few places around this time each year” he explained.

 

“Oh. Yeah, that’s cool I suppose. I’ve been hanging with Seth for a little while here” I explained.

 

“Yeah, I was just talking to him. We just got back a few hours ago from camp” he explained to me.

 

“I see…” I said.

 

“But yeah. He was telling me you and him were talking about coming here for the fourth of July?” he said.

 

“Yes, he brought it up. How’s it sound?” I asked.

 

“Oh it sounds great. I really don’t think there’ll be any problem with that, either… so if you can get permission from your mom, I see no problem with that” I heard him tell me.

 

A smile crept over my face.

 

“Awesome dude” I said.

 

“Yeah?” He said.

 

“Yeah…” I said back.

 

 

“Chapter Fourteen, A Familiar Melody”

 

 

“Hey baby” I heard.

 

I let out a kind of whimper, but not one of sadness, as my eyes slowly creaked open. There was sunlight that was flooding the room, illuminating every corner. I looked up, and there was my mommy, standing over me with a sweet smile. I smiled back, and she giggled…

 

She slowly reached for me, and picked me up effortlessly, out of my crib, and across the room, and finally laid me down on my changing table.

 

“Are you wet? You wet your diapee?” she said.

 

I of course contently giggled at the silliness of the word diapee. I also of course knew it was just a saying for diaper.

 

She took her index finger, and quickly slipped it down the front of my exposed diaper.

 

“Yeah you’re wet! You need a change!” she giggled.

 

She laid me down (since I was pretty much in the sitting position before), onto my back. I had gone through this so many times… she began to open my diaper by tearing the tapes from the front, and folded it down, exposing me completely.

 

Then, she began to slowly sing a song as she reached for a baby wipe and a fresh diaper from the shelve built into the table. She picked my legs up, and wiped by butt once or twice (I had apparently messed my diaper in my sleep, too…) and laid my legs back down. Then finally, she wiped the front of my diaper area, and eventually tossed the used wipes and the used diaper away into a trashcan.

 

Then finally, she took the baby powder and put some into her hand, and she rubbed it all over my diaper-area… all over my butt and on my front, too. And finally, she took a clean diaper, lifted my legs up one last time, and put the fresh diaper underneath me. She pulled the front over, and taped it very securely, leaving me laying there with her singing me a song, in a fresh diaper, as content as could be.

 

“I bet you’re hungry huh Aden? We’ll get you you’re bah-bah, okay? You want your bah-bah?” she jokingly asked me, chuckling.

 

I laughed and giggled, as she picked me up once more. I put my thumb into my mouth and began to suck contently, as she began to carry me out of my nursery, and into the kitchen…

 

---

 

Suddenly everything changed. The whole situation… my mother holding me so carefully in her arms had faded. Everything had faded and I was suddenly finding myself in my room (my current room) with my eyes shut, and a blanket over me. I had been dreaming once again… that same, yet always-different, dream of me being cared for by my mom, and me as an infant. It was once again so damn clear and realistic it almost seemed as though it wasn’t a dream at all.

 

I opened my eyes, sighed (which eventually turned into a yawn), stretched and cracked every bone in my body… same old deal. I laid in my bed for a few more minutes, before finally sitting up, and letting reality sink in for a few moments. Finally, I eventually stood up and walked out of my room, and into the kitchen.

 

It was daylight… and the clock on the wall of my kitchen told me it was still pretty early (some time around 9AM). I figured my mom was already at work, so I prepared myself a breakfast with the dream still stuck into my head.

 

The visions of my mom standing over me… her singing that song… that song… that song was so familiar. I heard it somewhere before. Remembering it brought that feeling I had in the dream, which was the feeling I got when wearing a diaper and sucking my thumb…

 

Then it hit me.

 

It was my mother’s song. It was my song. It was our song. It was the song she’d sing to me every time she was changing my diaper, or putting me to sleep… or giving me a bath. It was our song! She’d sing it, or hum it softly… And now that I heard it… again… it hit a chord. Suddenly, right there in the kitchen… as I was getting myself some cereal… I suddenly felt something in my chest just simply got hot, and I felt myself get tears in my eyes.

 

I sniffed once… and felt my eyes swell up with tears. I gasped for air as I gently placed the bowl and cereal on the table, and then sat down… as I felt myself beginning to gently cry. Something about the song, the dream… everything… it was all too hard and something had snapped. And before I knew it, I was sitting at that kitchen table with my face in my hands, crying unstoppably.

 

“Why!?” I said to myself, breathing heavily as tears rolled down my face.

 

“Why am I crying!?” I said to myself. I whimpered once, and twice, and a third time…

 

It was about five minutes before I could even begin to settle down. Something deep down in me hurt… something in me was aching so bad it made me cry hysterically, right there in my kitchen. My mom’s, and my song was stuck in my head, that was just continuously striking a nerve that caused so much aching I couldn’t stop crying.

 

But the tears eventually, after a slow transition from hysterical to some-what under control, faded and dried, and I was left there to eat my cereal completely confused. I felt the ache still… and suddenly I really, really missed my mom. At that moment, I wanted nothing more to see her walk through that doorway, pick me up, and continue singing that song…

 

But I knew better. I knew the hard truth that that won’t happen. I was 14 years old, not an infant anymore. I was a young teenager, not the cute, giddy, and giggly baby I was… I was growing up. I wasn’t supposed to wear diapers anymore. Sucking my thumb should be something I’ve gotten long over. And my mom would definitely not sing me our song anymore… at least not with me in her arms like I wanted.

 

I miserably ate my breakfast, and went back into my room. I wanted to put a diaper on, but I was honestly too miserable at that moment to really put the effort in putting one on. I just sat down in my computer chair, and went online, ignoring the dark feelings of depression, misery, and loneliness that were lingering in my mind.

 

And that’s what I did, all morning long.

 

---

 

I was reading some article on something, when suddenly my phone rang. It was about 12PM now, so I automatically assumed it was Brian, or Seth. The feelings of loneliness, depression, and misery were still present, but only just. I picked up, and asked who it was.

 

“Hey Aden” I heard. It was Brian’s voice, and he was as chipper as ever…

 

“Oh. Hey man” I replied, with a kind of austere tone.

 

“Not much… sitting around with Seth and Daniel” he said.

 

“Cool…” I said in a kind of grave tone.

 

I was doing automatically, and honestly didn’t even realize that I was sounding so miserable… but apparently he did.

 

“Everything alright Aden?” he asked.

 

I contemplated for a moment…

 

“Eh… honestly man… yeah… everything’s alright but I’m just feeling really shitty…” I admitted, guilty as charged.

 

“Oh… how come man?” he asked me.

 

I of course wasn’t going to answer that with the truth. I wasn’t going to say “I miss my mommy” like I really was…

 

Dunno… bad dreams stuck in my head” I said.

 

“Oh…” Brian said.

 

“…Well… you want us to come over? Maybe we can cheer you up” Brian offered.

 

I looked around… and the dismally quiet house I was contained in really made me feel horrible.

 

“Yeah… yeah that’d be nice” I admitted.

 

“Yeah?” Brian confirmed…

 

“Yeah man, come on over. Bring whoever you want, I’ll be here…” I said.

 

“Alright man, you just hold up. We’ll be there in a few minutes, okay?” he said.

 

“Okay…” I said.

 

And with that, we both hung up the phone, and now I was once again still feeling depressed. But I had a ray of hope kind of shining through the darkness, knowing that I had my best friends in the world coming to visit me to try to cheer me up… I felt touched.

 

---

 

It was, just like Brian had said over the phone, a few minutes before I heard a car stop in front of my house, and a ring at the doorbell. I more like hovered to the door, and opened it.

 

“Hey man” I heard.

 

I looked up, and there was Brian, Seth, and Daniel, standing at my door. The car that was in park outside my house slowly began to accelerate off as they saw that I had answered the door.

 

“Come on in” I said, trying to sound not as depressed as I really was.

 

They all came in, and as they all came in, Brian stopped in front of me.

 

“You alright Ade’?” he asked.

 

I nodded my head yes, but I could tell my eyes had a look of uncertainty. He nodded his head, showing off he wouldn’t take that as a correct answer. He bent his index finger at move (that signal to follow), and walked towards my room.

 

I sheepishly followed him, unsure of what his plans were.

 

“Oh, uh… you can turn the TV. My mom’s not home, so you can make yourselves at home” I said as I followed Brian.

 

“Alright, thanks” they both said to me as they sat on my couch, and turned on the TV…

 

I followed Brian until we were standing next to my room.

 

“Am I allowed in?” he asked me.

 

I thought for a moment… there were no diapers out in the open…

 

“Yeah” I said.

 

He opened the door, and we both proceeded into my room, and then he shut the door behind him, leaving only Brian and I alone in my room. I was unsure why he led me here… but I wasn’t arguing.

 

“What’s a matter?” he asked me.

 

I sat down at my computer chair, and made a hand gesture to Brian, telling him he was allowed to sit wherever.

 

“I told you man… just had some dreams that are stuck in my head that are depressing me” I said.

 

“Dreams huh?” he said.

 

“Yeah…” I replied.

 

“You want to tell me about them or no?” he asked.

 

I looked at him…

 

“They’re too difficult to really explain. Too vague, but just one or two elements in them are really just beating me up” I lied.

 

“Oh… okay” he said.

 

I nodded…

 

“Well man… I’d really appreciate if you talked to me about it… I think it’d make you feel better and it’d make you and I get closer as friends” he said.

 

I shrugged…

 

“There’s honestly not much to explain” I said.

 

“Okay…” he said.

 

I could tell he really wanted to get close with me on the friendly level. I was touched once again. I felt helpless, even though Brian was there willing to hear anything I was willing to say to him. But what was I going to say to him? I’m a diaper-lover… or teen baby… one of them… and those were the kinds of problems I was dealing with.

 

He simply wouldn’t be able to help me. He probably would even get freaked out, and leave the room. I mean… I really wish I could’ve taken him up on his offer to help me… I’d have loved to tell him everything. The diapers, the thumb sucking, the song, the dream, the sudden want to see my mom but unable to do it… but it simply was too awkward. And he certainly said he wasn’t a diaper-lover… so he says… so… it was just a problem I couldn’t talk to him about.

 

So rather than taking him up on his offer to help make me feeling emotionally better… I just nodded and left it at that.

 

“Okay” he said understandingly.

 

“Brian…” I said morbidly.

 

“I really appreciate you being here. And I’m not trying to push you away, I really enjoy your efforts… you’ve taken me to a private spot, one-on-one and tried to have this conversation and I really, really do thank you for this but… I really can’t explain it right now. It’s all too complex for me to even understand. But I’ll be fine in a few hours… just… when this shit stops going on in my head.” I explained.

 

He shook his head understandingly.

 

“So… thanks… there’s nothing to worry about though…” I assured, standing up, sighing.

 

“Okay… and really… no need to thank me Aden” he said.

 

I looked over at him.

 

“What are friends for?” he said.

 

I smiled, and nodded my head, and opened my door. We both walked out and into the living room, and we both sat down on the couch, since Daniel was sitting in a chair. We all began to watch TV… and in short time… I did indeed begin to feel better. Although there was that depression that though was fading way, was always lingering in the back of my mind. But I was very fortunate to have my friends over… because they really did start to make me feel better.

 

---

 

“So you’ve been camping all this time, you two?” Seth asked.

 

“Yeah, we go every year.” Brian explained.

 

“Yeah, my dad has been bringing Brian and I up to this little portion of land my grandfather owns, since we were like five” Daniel explained.

 

“Oh, that’s cool. What do you three do normally?” I asked.

 

“Us four… my grandpa comes up sometimes. We just generally go hiking, camping… fishing and stuff like that. He has a cabin and stuff” Brian explained.

 

“Oh that’s cool…” I said.

 

We were all socializing and basically being good friends again. It was fun…

 

“Yeah man… we’ve had some good times. There’s a lake and stuff that we swim at sometimes” Daniel explained.

 

I and Seth nodded understandingly.

 

“Who knows? Maybe you two can come along with us if we go up again” Brian said.

 

“Thanks man, that’ll be fun” Seth said.

 

Daniel and Brian nodded.

 

I took a sip of the Pepsi I had poured myself a few minutes earlier, as Seth began to talk.

 

“That’s cool that you two go up to your cabin with your dad and grandpa like that. I take it you two are pretty close with them?” Seth said.

 

“Yeah… we talk a lot during those times. Kind of builds that general male-to-male bonding thing, you know?” Brian began…

 

“Yeah… but I’ve never really spent a whole lot of time with my dad and I feel I can relate to him a lot” Seth said.

 

I sat back in my seat just listening in on the conversation, not really paying a whole lot attention to the subject.

 

“I feel there’s like a weird sense you need in your life, with you and your dad. I can’t really imagine living without a father… can’t really imagine what it’d be like, you know? Having that strange space that your mom just entirely fills” Seth said.

 

This began to catch my attention a bit… I of course, was idle in the conversation now… and acted as though I wasn’t really caring. But I was getting a bit more interested… after all; I… didn’t have a father. And I’d like to hear where this was going…

 

“Yeah man… my dad and his dad really bonded through camping and stuff and I think that’s what my dad’s trying to build with Brian and me” Daniel explained.

 

I continued to listen…

 

“I really can’t imagine what it’d be like to not have a father…” Brian said.

 

I felt the need to reveal myself here, before someone said something bad. I did a fake cough, and they all looked at me, since I did that kind of fake cough that you could tell was fake.

 

“….OH. Dude! I’m so sorry!” Brian said, looking very sincere and embarrassed, and everyone else said the same.

 

“Nah… I don’t really care” I said.

 

“Okay… but I really am sorry. I wasn’t thinking” Seth said.

 

I shrugged.

 

“Seriously, don’t worry about it. I don’t care” I insisted.

 

“Okay…” they all said.

 

But the room was silent now. The once speech-filled room was silent, because of everyone’s embarrassment because of me. I felt a bit embarrassed for killing it…

 

“…Aden…” Brian spoke sheepishly.

 

“Yeah?” I asked.

 

“…I don’t want to seem rude. And I don’t want to speak about things that may make you feel uncomfortable, or you may feel isn’t my business… but do you mind if I ask you a question?” he said sheepishly.

 

I knew what he was going to ask…

 

“You want to know about my dad?” I asked.

 

He nodded.

 

“Brian, dude. That’s fucked” Daniel said.

 

“No, its fine. I don’t really care, like I said. I can talk about it” I explained.

 

“My dad… I never really met him. He lives in my old town, and according to my mom, he left when I was a still a baby” I explained.

 

“Oh… that’s horrible” Brian said.

 

I shrugged.

 

“From what I was told, he and my mother were actually husband and wife of course; it wasn’t like my mom got knocked up on some one-night stand.” I explained…

 

“But one day, he just got up and left. This is what I was told. My mom and my dad had a fight, and then, the next morning, he was gone. My mom was left to raise a child, me, by herself.” I explained.

 

“That’s fucked” I heard Seth say.

 

“Yeah… but I’m fine. He still lives in my old town, and my mom has seen him. She has nothing to say to him. Neither do I” I explained.

 

“Well… that’s messed up, but at least you aren’t that bothered by the whole matter…” Seth said.


   I nodded, agreeing with them. Brian coughed, though…

 

“Anyway!” he said, insinuating he wanted to get off of the subject.

 

---

 

“So how about that sleepover at our house?” Brian said, changing the subject from what it was before.

 

“Yeah man… I can’t wait for that” I said.

 

“The 4th is in two days” Brian reminded.

 

“I’m all for it. All I have to do is ask my mom” I said.

 

“That’s cool… you think she’ll let you?” Brian asked.

 

“I’m absolutely positive she will” I assured.

 

“Awesome. This’ll be sweet, having you two sleepover. We can do all kinds of stuff! We can go to the park, and watch the fireworks and stuff, then come home, and maybe watch some movies, or… do dares…” Brian said.

 

Ahhh yes… the dares” Seth said.

 

“Those were fun. But I don’t know why, they just kind of lost their charm” I said.

 

Brian looked fairly eager to do them. I looked over at him… as we were discussing the dares for the first time in a month. He still was interested… and I was almost too, but I mean… even I, a diaper-lover (and possible teen baby) was getting bored with them – and that is a reason for concern. But of course… Brian, the self-proclaimed non-diaper-lover, still wants to do them.

 

I kind of let a small smirk carry across my face as I looked at Brian. I mean… It was so damn obvious. It was so obvious to me he was a diaper-lover… even if he was unaware of it. Then it occurred to me… maybe he WASN’T aware of it! Maybe Brian, really did enjoy being in diapers, but was unaware of what a diaper-lover was like I was for the first few weeks!

 

This thought had occurred to me, and I guess I was smirking noticeably because suddenly, Brian pointed it out.

 

“What’s up Aden?” he asked, knocking me from my trance.

 

“Huh? Oh nothing… just remembered the dares and stuff, since you mentioned them. They were fun…” I said.

 

“Yeah… yeah they were pretty good times. And you’re the one that had the biggest problem with them” Brian said laughing.

 

“Hey… I did too” Seth said, defending me a bit.

 

“Well, since they got old… I got a few ideas… I thought of a few things to help make them more exciting or more difficult” Brian said.

 

“Oh? What would that be?” I curiously asked.

 

He let a devious smile out at me and the room.

 

“I ain’t telling” he said.

 

This shocked me a bit. I wasn’t prepared for that response… and now… I was really curious.

 

“C’mon man” I pried.

 

“Nope, I ain’t telling. Its gonna be a surprise” he said with a devious smile.

 

As much as I wanted to know… I at the same time wanted there to be a surprise. But I wondered… what could he possibly have up his sleeve for the 4th of July? I was damn curious now… I was fascinated, while at the same time, kind of nervous to hear what Brian might do to his brother, Seth, and I.

 

But even though I wanted to know… I wasn’t going to be stubborn. I was going to let Brian have his little fun, and I’ll play along.

 

“Alright” I said with a confident smile back.

 

There was a silence in the room after I had said that… kind of an uncomfortable silence.

 

“…so how about that fireworks display!” Seth said, breaking the silence intentionally.

 

“Yeah, yeah – that fireworks display at the park, they hold it every year here as you might expect… They got all kinds of fireworks, ones that go boom… usually ones you have to light… ones that make some form of an explosion in the sky” Daniel ranted on sarcastically.

 

“Let me guess, some are different colors than others?” Seth sarcastically replied with a smile.

 

“You’re correct young sir.” Daniel replied just as sarcastically.

 

We all laughed.

 

“Nah, for real… what’s going down with that?” Seth asked.

 

“Alright… if I’m not mistaken… we should all drive up, and arrive at like… 8:30, maybe, ‘cus that gives us an hour before the sun is all the way down. We can do whatever at the little festival they always have there, then when the sun is pretty far down, they’ll start shooting stuff off until probably 11PM. Then we can come back to my house, we can do dares or whatever we want… and basically do whatever till tomorrow” Brian explained.

 

“Festival huh?” I intriguingly said.

 

“Yes. They have all kinds of stands with games with prizes and stuff” Brian said.

 

“Yeah… sounds a lot like what my old town used to do” I said.

 

“Welp… sounds fun guys” Seth said.

 

“Yeah, sounds fun” I agreed.

 

“Well I don’t know about you two, or you Daniel… but I’m in the mood for some ice cream. Anyone want to walk down to the ice-cream shop and get something?” Brian asked.

 

I felt around in my pocket… these were the same pants I was wearing yesterday when I went to buy the diapers. It still had my change in it.

 

“I’ve got money” I said.

 

“I brought some” Seth said.

 

“Yeah… me too” Daniel said, feeling around in his pocket.

 

“Alright… so you guys want to go there then?” Brian confirmed.

 

“Yeah” we all concurred.

 

“Sweet… alright, well… let’s go then!” Brian excitedly said.

 

It was a much longer trek then originally planned, or than it was the first time I had gone there, when I was on my bike with Seth. But, in time, we of course arrived, talking all the way there.

 

We ate our ice-cream, and eventually came back to my house. By then, I was all cheered up and was happy. The depression from earlier that day had vanished, and I was as happy as ever as I was hanging out with my friends. But of course, they had to leave in time. It was many hours before they had to leave though, and by the time they did… it was almost dusk.

 

---

 

“Alright, see you guys” I said, waving them off as Brian and Daniel went into their mom’s car, and Seth was walking home.

 

Cya Aden” they all said as they left.

 

I watched all three of them vanish from my site. The street light all popped on as the sun was low enough, making what I could see of Seth, a black silhouette in the distance. I smiled as the day all came into memory, and walked back inside of my house, filled with hope for the 4th of July.

 

And as I was thinking of what the sleepover we’ve planned would be like… what Brian said to me all came back into memory. About what he said about he has some fresh ideas, and that it’s a surprise. I was still very curious… but as I wondered, with this time and silence to myself… I became more and more curious, as ideas flooded my mind.

 

I wondered what it could possibly be. Was it something to do with diapers? If so… what could possibly be so much more different then the ones we were already doing? But then again… maybe they had nothing to do with diapers at all. Maybe it was something completely new… something totally fresh. My attempts to bring those to mind were going no where.

 

I shrugged it off. I knew it was inevitable and my trying to break Brian’s surprise was getting me no where. So instead… I just kind of laid there, thinking of random things.

 

“Man… Brian, Daniel, and Seth are such good friends” I thought.

 

“I mean… they came all the way over here just to cheer me up…” I remembered.

 

“I can’t wait for Monday…” I said to myself. Monday, was the Fourth of July.

 

 

“Chapter Fifteen (Part I), The Night of Anticipation (Getting the Goods) “

 

 

“Happy 4th of July” I read.

 

“Hey thanks Luke, you too” I typed.

 

That had been the first happy 4th I had received all day… however the all day part was only about five minutes long. I had just woke up, (about five minutes ago). My day had just begun… And it was finally the 4th of July.

 

“What’ve you got planned for tonight?” I read.

 

“Oh you know… The sleepover at Brian’s and Daniel’s with Seth is bound to be fun as hell” I explained.

 

“Ah yes… any other plans, maybe you and your mom doing something?” Luke typed to me.

 

I thought for a moment…

 

“She and I are supposed to go to the park for a bit and watch the fireworks display. That’s when I’m getting picked up by Brian’s mom” I explained.

 

“Oh, that’s cool” I read.

 

“So you’re going to go there, watch and hang out with your mom for a bit… then after words just go to Brian’s house?” he checked.

 

“Yes” I confirmed.

 

“That’s cool…” he said.

 

“So what are YOU going to be doing tonight?” I asked him.

 

“Oh nothing much… My family is coming over and we’re going to have a barbeque… We will be able to see the fireworks from our backyard like we’re actually there. I guess we technically actually are there in person… considering the baseball field they are shooting them from is only a block away” he explained.

 

lol yeah” I typed.

 

“You have any baby plans for tonight?” I asked.

 

“Hmmm…” I read.

 

“Well… I might not have any time.” I read.

 

“Oh” I said.

 

“Yeah… If I could I would” I saw him reply.

 

Heh” I typed.

 

“Speaking of babyish things and such… how’s that whole situation you’ve been dealing with, thinking you might be a teen baby?” I saw him say.

 

“Hmmm… it’s been like three days since then… I’ve gotten on this strong thumb sucking kick” I replied.

 

“Oh? Widdle Baby Aden a thumbthucker?” I read.

 

This made me blush a bit… I wasn’t used to being babyishly talked to… and certainly wasn’t used to being called Baby Aden… well… not recently anyway.

 

Hehe… I suppose so” I typed.

 

“You should get a pacifier or something. Those things rock” I saw Luke type to me.

 

“Hmmm… I never actually ever thought about buying one” I said.

 

“Oh they are very nice… I love my pacifier.” Luke typed back to me.

 

“I dunno man… I’m too used to just worrying about buying diapers for myself. If I have teen baby feelings… it kind of complicates things. I already have problems buying diapers, hiding them, disposing of them unnoticeably…” I ranted.

 

“Well man, you don’t need to buy anything babyish to be babyish. I went a little while at first when I was absorbing what I was without sucking on a pacifier. I just decided to buy one at one point” he replied.

 

“*nods*” I typed.

 

“But um… yeah. I have to go for now. My mom is yelling at me for being on the computer” he typed to me.

 

“Oh, okay” I replied.

 

“Later man” he said.

 

And with that, he logged off. It was just me in my haggard and groggy state of mind. All of my senses were still waking up, but by now, they were more awake then not, since I had been talking with Luke online for a little while.

 

I stood up, stretched, cracked some joints, and continued out of my room. I slowly, almost zombie-like, walked through the halls and into my kitchen.

 

“Hi Aden” I heard. It was my mom.

 

“Hey mom…” I said as I hovered over to the kitchen table.

 

“You want some breakfast?” she asked me as I sat down lazily into my chair.

 

“Sure” I said as I rested my head on the table.

 

“Okay Aden, hang on a sec’ and I’ll get you something to eat, okay?” she told me.

 

I moaned something that even I didn’t know what I said. She chuckled and I heard some dishes clanging, I heard the fridge opening and shutting, the sound of cereal pouring into a bowl, and some pouring, clanging (the sound of a spoon hitting the side of a bowl), and finally, the sound of a fridge door opening and shutting again. Then finally, the bowl of cereal was placed right in front of me. I looked up.

 

MmmmCinnamon Toast Crunch.” I thought.

 

“Thanks” I said.

 

“No problem Aden” she said, patting me on the head.

 

She walked away from me, but not out of the room. She remained and continued to do the dishes like she was doing originally when I had entered the room.

 

I stuck a spoonful of the sugar coated, artificially cinnamon flavored, one inch by one inch squares of tasty deliciousness into my mouth, wondering what my future held for me for the day to come.

 

“So are you excited for the sleepover tonight?” my mom asked me.

 

“Sure am” I said.

 

“What are you guys going to do tonight?” she asked.

 

“Oh you know… sit back, watch movies and stuff. I haven’t seen Brian or Daniel in a while, they’ve been camping with their dad” I explained.

 

 “That sounds fun” she replied.

 

I of course could not tell her what was really on the night’s agenda, for two reasons. One is common sense… I of course wasn’t going to tell her that I was going to run around in diapers (maybe). And the second was… even if I wanted to tell her… I still didn’t know what Brian’s plans were for us for tonight.

 

---

 

I ate my cereal, and drank the milk, too, in about ten minutes. My mom and I talked about a few things in the meantime, but I eventually retreated to my room, as usual. I sat down on my computer, and went onto the forums I normally visited every day, to check up on any recent posts.

 

There was the expected ‘Happy Fourth of July!!!’ post. I replied to that, and replied to a few others of interest. Nothing out of the ordinary…  But suddenly, right when I had hit the ‘X (close)’ button on my browser, my phone began to ring.

 

I coughed, and cleared my throat, reached over, and picked it up…

 

“Hello?” I asked.

 

“Hey Aden, its Brian” I heard on the other line.

 

“Oh hey man” I said.

 

“What are you up to?” I heard.

 

“Not much… woke up like a half-hour ago” I said.

 

“Ha-ha… I’ve been up. Daniel and I woke up bright and early as usual.” I heard.

 

“Hey, I’ve got a question” I heard.

 

“Sure, what’s up?” I heard.

 

“Daniel and I are going to go to the store. I just called Seth; he said he’s down for meeting us there. You want to come along?” I heard.

 

“Sure” I said.

 

“Awesome. Just get dressed and start walking or ride your bike or whatever. We’ll be there” I heard.

 

“Alright” I said.

 

“Is your mom dropping you off?” I asked.

 

“Hah… no… we’re going to go down there to buy diapers” I heard. There was, of course, a moment of silence before he said diapers. But the word instantly felt like someone punched me in my heart to make it stop, for a second.

 

“…oh?” I said with a tone of interest.

 

“Yeah… for some reason… my stash is clean. All out… some of them seemed like they just up and disappeared into thin air.” I heard.

 

This made my heart REALLY stop beating for a second. He of course was making a reference to the diapers I had stolen off of him several weeks ago.

 

“Ha-ha… that’s funny… and weird, too” I said.

 

“Yeah… you wouldn’t know anything about them?” I heard.

 

My heart once again skipped a beat. Did he know!? How did he!? I mustn’t have been quiet enough. Someone must have been awake when I did… my mind was racing.

 

I coughed unintentionally before spitting out my next sentence.

 

“O-Of course n-not!” I said uneasily.

 

“Ha-ha… just messing with you Aden. Get dressed, and get your butt down here” I heard.

 

My heart relaxed.

 

“Eh… heh… yeah… I um… I knew that” I said.

 

“Uh huh… get over to the store. Meet up with Seth and then wait for us. We’ll be there. Alright?” I heard.

 

“Alright” I said.

 

“Okay, later” Brian said.

 

“Later” I responded.

 

I hung up the phone after hearing his hang up. I took a breath of relief after that was over with, and looked over at my closet and dresser. Time to get dressed…

 

---

 

“So how you been?” I heard, as I was walking down the street.

 

It was only Seth and I as we walked towards the store, to meet Brian and Daniel. It was a warm day. Not hot, like it had been for the last few weeks. Today was a surprisingly simply warm day. The temperature must’ve been only 60 to 70 degrees, with a nice breeze. The sky was so clear of any clouds; all you could see was the endless blue above you…

 

“I’ve been alright” I said.

 

“Man it’s a beautiful day out here” I said.

 

“You’re telling me” he replied.

 

“I haven’t seen a beautiful day like this since at least spring” he said.

 

“I know…” I said.

 

There was a bit of silence then…

 

“So what do you think Brian has in store for us tonight?” he asked me.

 

“No idea… but it involves diapers, once again” I reminded.

 

“Yeah…” he remembered.

 

“Ever notice that Brian is always into diapers?” I was asked.

 

“Huh?” I responded.

 

“He’s always eager to put a diaper on” Seth said.

 

I looked at Seth with a look of consideration, but in my mind, I was thinking what I could possibly do to defend Brian in this situation. Seth was apparently not a diaper-lover, or teen baby, but rather, a normal teenage boy like I was before I came here.

 

“Well… he says he just wants to do dares” I said.

 

He looked back at me…

 

“Yeah but doesn’t it seem a bit strange that he is always thinking of something to do with diapers? Not like normal dares… like, Hey, I dare you to ring this dude’s doorbell and run, or anything. Seems a tad strange” Seth said.

 

“Well… I don’t know man… I mean… Brian’s a strange kid in the first place” I said.

 

Seth stopped for a moment and kind of looked into oblivion (an obvious sign that I had just made something click in his head).

 

“You know that’s true” Seth said, continuing his walk with me down to the store.

 

“Yeah… Brian’s just Brian. Besides… it doesn’t matter if he… say… enjoyed to wear diapers, anyway, right?” I said.

 

“I guess not… I was just wondering if you noticed the giddiness in him when a dare is going to happen” Seth explained.

 

I looked at Seth…

 

“…yeah I kind of did but… it doesn’t really matter to me” I said.

 

There was a bit of silence after I said that, but we both kept walking down towards the store.

 

“So I wonder what he has in store for us tonight” Seth said, bringing up the previous topic of before…

 

---

 

We talked on our way down to the store, but in what seemed like only a few moments, we were standing in front of the entrance, waiting for Brian and Daniel to come walking from their direction of town, up to us.

 

“Hey guys!” we heard only a few minutes after.

 

I looked at Seth and Seth looked at me.

 

“Where the hell is he?” Seth asked me with a confused face, but was laughing.

 

We looked around, and eventually saw Brian and Daniel too, standing a great distance from us, waiting to cross the street. He was wearing his backpack, indicating that he was ready.

 

Seth signaled him to come on over, and in only a few minutes, he was standing right next to us.

 

“Alright…” he said, with a tone of voice like he was the commander of some top secret mission that was breaking international laws… or in other words, a serious tone.

 

“We’re just gonna go in, get some, then we can go to like the club house or something. How’s that sound?” Brian said.

 

We all nodded.

 

“Alright, let’s go” he said.

 

We walked into the store, which was very nice and cool. The temperature outside was hot considered to the air-conditioning that was going on in the store. We didn’t really say anything to each other, and personally… my heart was beating kind of strong. I felt nervous for no reason… I guess it was the diaper-loving side of me wigging out like it did when I heard or saw anything pertaining to diapers.

 

But I held up. We calmly walked through the aisles, and eventually, through the baby’s and medical aisle, where there were baby’s products, diapers, and other things, as far as the eye could see. We calmly walked by, and without any hesitation in our walking, Brian snagged the first pack of the diapers we could wear.

 

I glanced over as we were walking… it was a pack of diapers alright. The same kind I had, as a matter of fact. Which was non-coincidently, the same kind I first wore when I was at Brian’s and Daniel’s house that one night.

 

We still didn’t speak to each other. As a matter of fact… we didn’t even look at each other. We just quietly, calmly placed the bag of diapers onto the counter. We all looked different ways as we heard the cashier ring the diapers up, bag them, and rip the receipt from the receipt-printer-thingy.

 

“14.99 please” the cashier said.

 

Brian walked over, handed her the cash, and we all left the store.

 

---

 

“Holy shit” Seth said, laughing.

 

There was a huge tension break in the atmosphere… you could literally feel everyone just instantly calm down as we made it outside.

 

“SWEET” Brian yelled eagerly… a bit too eagerly.

 

I looked over at him with a face of suspicion, accidentally.

 

“…what? Sweet… sweet we have um… erm… something… yeah… Sweet for having something to do tonight” Brian said, clearing his throat a few times.

 

I shrugged non-caringly. He faced the ground and cleared his throat again.

 

“Man… that was fun. It felt like everyone was watching us like “Hey, why’s there a group of teenage boys buying teen diapers?”” Seth said, laughing.

 

“They probably were…” Daniel said, in a bare tone.

 

“Okay, so what are we going to do now?” I said.

 

“Club house?” Brian suggested.

 

“Alright… that sounds good to me” Seth said. Daniel concurred, non-caringly. And I of course, didn’t care.

 

So to the club house, we went.

 

 

“Chapter Fifteen (Part II), The Night of Anticipation (Just Watch the Fireworks…) “

 

 

Now… we did, indeed go to the clubhouse. But we did not spend much time there… soon, we had to all go back to our homes. We had to pack… and eat… and do all kinds of things, before we were finally going to have the night to ourselves.

 

---

 

“Come on Aden! We have to hurry up if you want to play games at the fair” I heard my mom yell to me from the living room.

 

I hastily went through everything in my room. I opened my dresser, and was digging through a few drawers, picking some extra pairs of pants to bring with me. After that, I dug through my closet, and carelessly tossed some shirts onto the floor, not caring for them, just getting them out of the way of the few shirts I wanted to bring with me.

 

I looked around, and after getting everything into my backpack… took a breath. I wondered if I had everything I needed… everything I’d need for the night, that we’d be doing dares.

 

“Hmmm… our dares… obviously involved diapers…” I thought to myself.

 

“Should I bring my own?” I wondered.

 

“Come on Aden, hurry up!” I heard my mom shout to me.

 

I sighed, and hastily dug into my hiding spot, as well… picking up three extra diapers to bring along with me, just for the hell of it.

 

“Okay mom, I’ll be there in a minute” I yelled back.

 

I was unsure of my decision to pick them up. I actually really didn’t even think about it… I had made sure to stuff them into the very bottom of my backpack, to make sure no one saw them.

 

I zipped my bag and left my room, and walked into the living room. My mom was sitting on the couch’s arm, waiting for me.

 

“All ready to go?” she asked me.

 

“Yes” I confirmed.

 

“Okay, let’s go then” she said.

 

We both stepped out of the house… My mom reached into the house, and turned the living room light off. She shut the door, and locked it from the outside using her key and we were then on our way.

 

We walked to our car, and we got in. She turned the car on, pulled out, and we began to drive down the street.

 

“Okay Aden… you know where it is better than I do. Tell me where to go please” she said.

 

I cleared my throat and began to direct us in the proper directions through the streets.

 

“Make a left here” I said.

 

If I wasn’t mistaken… it was going to be the same park I was at the other day (when I was having a breakdown). So, I was taking us there.

 

And fortunately, I was correct. We turned the corner and all of the sudden, there were hundreds of people, walking through thin aisles between ticket booths, game booths, food stands, whatever booths… It really did seem quite… festive.

 

“Oh… well… I guess we’re here!” my mom said. We drove for a minute, found a parking space, and got out of the car.

 

We walked through the area for a bit. It was still day light, though the sun was setting. We still had an hour or two to go before we had to find Brian, Daniel, and Seth.

 

Though… it wasn’t going to take that long to find them… though this place was a fairly crowded area at the moment, it wasn’t that big. So finding Brian, Seth, and Daniel wasn’t going to be very hard.

 

My mom and I went to the ticket booth, and bought some tickets for the games and such, and began to walk around, playing random games.

 

“Hey Aden!” I suddenly heard.

 

---

 

I spun around at the mention of my name, to see who it was. The people around us made it difficult to tell…

 

But I spun around and saw Seth, his dad, and his mom, holding Ethan’s hand.

 

“Hey Seth” I said, waving.

 

“What’s happenin’” he said, adjusting his hat a bit so that it was pointing a bit in a diagonal direction.

 

“Not much man… where’s Brian at, do you know?” I asked.

 

“I’ve got no idea actually.” He said.

 

“Any idea on how we could find them?” I asked.

 

Uhhh… actually… no” Seth said.

 

We both chuckled a bit…

 

“We should go look for them – they’re definitely here by now.” Seth said.

 

I felt a bit confused…

 

“How do you know?” I asked.

 

He looked at me and laughed…

 

“There’s their car” he said, pointing behind me.

 

I turned around, and Seth wasn’t lying. Behind me, in parking-lot in the distance, was the car Brian and Daniel have driven up to my house in a few times. It was parked, all lights were off and all seats were empty. They were here… but where?

 

I looked around but there was no sign of them.

 

“Mom, do you mind if we go to look for Brian and Daniel?” I asked my mom.

 

She smiled…

 

“Go ahead” she said.

 

“Alright, let’s go” Seth said, after gaining acceptance from his parents as well.

 

Seth and I separated from our parents, and continued through the whole area by ourselves.

 

---

 

We searched the area about twice in total… but we didn’t see them. It was really actually difficult to, considering how Seth and I were only about 13. We were short and small, and we couldn’t really see through most of the other people that were there. But on our third patrol… we got kind of lucky.

 

“MAN” I said out of a bit of frustration.

 

“Where the hell could they be?” I said.

 

Seth looked over at me, as we were walking by the ticket booth.

 

“Chill man… they’re somewhere around here” Seth assured me.

 

I wasn’t really upset… I was just impatient, which is what I explained to him. He nodded his head and sighed a bit… and he looked at me…

 

“You want to get something to drink?” he asked me.

 

“I’d love to… but I don’t have money” I explained.

 

He made a face of kind of disgust, or annoyance and irritation, and looked into the distance at nothing in particular…

 

“What!?” I asked, completely confused.

 

Suddenly he started laughing…

 

“Man I was going to pay!” he said, laughing at my reaction.

 

“Oh! You dick… you should have just said that” I said, laughing along with him now.

 

He took a breath from laughing… “Come on man, let’s go” he said.

 

We both had cheesy smirks on our faces as we were laughing, walking to the refreshment booth that was only a few steps away from where we originally were.

 

“I’ll have uh… Pepsi!” I said eagerly, to the person that was handling the booth.

 

“Alright” the man said.

 

“And what about you?” the man asked Seth.

 

“Coke” he said.

 

“Alright, no problem. What sizes?” he asked us.

 

I thought for a minute… “I don’t know - whatever he wants to buy me. He’s buying” I said.

 

Seth smiled… “Large” he said.

 

It was only a few moments before we were both holding large sodas in our hands. Seth handed him the money and we were back on our way.

 

“Thanks a lot Seth” I said.

 

He looked at me and had a friendly smile on his face. “No problem Aden” he said.

 

I looked at him and he looked at me for a few seconds…

 

“GUYS!” we both heard. It sounded like Brian.

 

We looked around and suddenly we found them. Brian and Daniel, standing a few feet from us…

 

“Where have you been!?” we heard Brian say, chuckling a bit.

 

We all started laughing a bit… with the exception of Daniel of course. But Brian, Seth, and I, were all laughing.

 

“Dude, we’ve been looking for you for the last like… 15 minutes” I explained.

 

“Same here” Brian said.

 

“Alright… so we’re here now. Now what?” Seth asked, adjusting his hat, making sure it’s crooked to the side, like he normally had it.

 

“Do you listen to rap, Seth?” I asked, because of the way he was adjusting his hat… it was a lot like what most people who listen to hip-hop and rap wore theirs.

 

He looked at me with a very suspicious smirk.

 

“Maybe” he said smugly.

 

I couldn’t help but ask…

 

“Is that a problem?” he asked, sarcastically.

 

I just shrugged.

 

“Not to me!” I replied, smiling.

 

But suddenly I heard Brian clearing his throat, in that kind of “notice me” way. We all looked at him.

 

“We should go find our parents and get ready to watch the fireworks display” Brian explained.

 

“Yeah… that sounds good” I said. We all nodded and then started walking back to find our parents…

 

---

 

“We found them mom” I said to my mother.

 

It was only a few minutes to find our parents again… most of that time was because of the amount of people there was to push through.

 

“Oh! Great” she said, smiling at me.

 

She was standing with Brian’s parents, and Seth’s parents, assumingly conversing with them.

 

“Lets find a good spot” Brian’s mom said.

 

“That sounds like a good idea” my mom concurred with her.

 

“C’mon Aden” my mom said to me, taking my hand… it was an automatic reflex.

 

We all began moving through the dense crowd of people, but as there became more room in the field we were going through, the crowd became more scattered. We had moved from the thin-paths between booths, to a wide open field.

 

It was a pretty big, flat, open area… which kind of made me wonder what exactly it was supposed to be for.

 

“Hey Brian” I asked.

 

“Yeah?” he responded.

 

“What’s this field for?” I asked.

 

“It’s a soccer court” he said.

 

“Oh!” I said… I realized quickly that he was right. At both ends of the field were soccer goals.

 

“Yeah… this is the soccer court that we play home games on. That’s about all the action this field sees when it comes to soccer though. Usually it’s some kids tossing a football or something” Daniel explained.

 

“Oh, cool… thanks” I said to both of them.

 

“So… what are we doing?” Seth asked.

 

“Everyone sits in the field and watches the fireworks, which are launched from the baseball field over there” Brian said, pointing towards a small patch of trees.

 

“Well… you can’t really see it from here. The woods are in the way. But on the other side there’s a baseball field.” Brian continued.

 

“Oh, okay. Thanks” Seth said.

 

We walked for a few minutes, and eventually all sat down. We were pretty close to the woods (for a better view I’d assume). This was great timing, too. It was beginning to get dark. Actually… beginning to, is an understatement. I guess you could say it WAS dark. Everything had a dark blue tone to it, and the sun was no where in site. It was pretty much dark enough for them to begin a fireworks display.

 

“This is where we sit every year” Brian explained to me.

 

“Cool” I responded.

 

“Yeah… you get a real, real good view from here. You’re practically underneath them” he added.

 

 I guess I started growing a small smirk… and began staring into nothingness once more. The whole atmosphere was really getting to me. This was awesome. This was really, really fun! I mean… the BIG picture was sinking into me again… a feeling like this hadn’t come to me in a while. I wasn’t talking about diapers. I was talking about friends. This was the most comfortable, homely feeling I’ve had since… well, was home in my old town, with my old friends, in my old house.

 

I was sitting here with three friends I never thought I would have. When I first moved here, I was nervous. I didn’t want to leave my old friends, go to a new school or wake up in a new house. But moments like this really made me appreciate feeling at home again. The only other time I really felt this way was… me and Brian, in the club house, that one night that seemed so long ago. I guess when I was moving here I expected everything to be over for me… everything to be completely different, and for me to never have friends again.

 

This was all sinking in again… My mom was talking and conversing with Brian’s and Seth’s parents… I was having a good time with Brian and Seth and Daniel… I felt like I belonged here for the first time… in a long time. But suddenly, something broke my attention.

 

Aden!” Brian said, with a cheesy smile.

 

“Huh? What?” I asked, coming out of my trance.

 

Seth and Brian started chuckling a bit.

 

“You ready for tonight?” he asked me with a devilish grin.

 

“I believe so, yes” I admitted.

 

“Good… because we’re gonna have a good time. I’ve been thinking of stuff… writing them down, and stuff” Brian admitted.

 

“Hmm… you sure did go through a lot for us huh?” I said.

 

“Yup yup” Brian said with a smile.

 

I stared at Brian for a second. He was about to say something else to add onto his conversation. But right when he did… right when his mouth opened, all I heard was ‘FWOOM!’ The sound was followed by a huge light that launched into the sky. It looked like a little stream of light that appeared from behind the trees. It shot straight up, and then suddenly, EXPLODED into a beautiful display of colors, lights, and sounds.

 

The fireworks display had begun. Everyone around me began applauding and without much hesitation, the next firework rocket was shot off, and once again exploded into yet another beautiful display.

 

 

“Chapter Fifteen (Part III), The Night of Anticipation (A Bond Pulled Stronger) “

 

 

There was a roar of applause. My ears were ringing and when I shut my eyes, there were flashes of mid-air explosions and lights caught in my mind’s eye. The fireworks display was over in about 45 minutes… maybe an hour. Everyone was standing up and began talking again.

 

“Well, I guess I’m gonna let you go now Aden” my mom said with a smile.

 

I laughed.

 

“You have a good time at Brian’s house. Call me if you need me, okay?” she asked.

 

“Okay mom” I said reassuringly.

 

She came towards me and gave a hug, and let me go.

 

“I should be around to call you around… 12PM?” my mom asked.

 

“Okay” I nodded understandingly.

 

“Nice to meet you!” my mom said to Seth’s parents – she had already met Brian’s parents the first time I slept over at their house.

 

I looked over and saw Seth’s parents doing the same thing with Seth.

 

“Nice to meet you too!” they responded to my mom.

 

And that was that. My mom and I waved each other off, as did Seth’s parents with Seth. We were both left with Brian, Daniel, and their parents.

 

“Okay guys, let’s get to the car and then we’ll order a pizza. How’s that sound?” Brian’s dad said.

 

“Yeah that sounds good!” Seth said.

 

We all pushed ourselves through the crowd of people; all were trying to get to the same destination (the parking lot). But we were successful and eventually got the car that Seth and I had seen only an hour and a half ago.

 

“Buckle up” Brian’s mom said to us as we all packed into the backseat – and we complied.

 

---

 

“Okay guys, c’mon!” I heard Brian say as we all walked in through the front door of Brian’s house.

 

He rushed upstairs, but we walked… since no one had as much spare energy as he did apparently. By the time we got upstairs and into the room, Brian had already taken his book bag from earlier today and put it next to him. I walked into the room, and Seth shut the door behind me (since he was the last one to come in).

 

“Lock it” Brian whispered to us.

 

I turned around to do that… but Seth was still in front of the door so he beat me to it. He pressed a little button next to the doorknob, which made a loud ‘click’ sound, indicating it was locked.

 

“What’s up Brian” Seth said.

 

He really did know what was up. He was just getting things going.

 

“Okay… things can’t really start up until later on tonight, after my parents go to bed. But until then… I thought of something that might be funny” Brian explained.

 

“What’s that” I asked.

 

“Put a diaper on. Wear them underneath your pants until we get ready to go to the clubhouse” Brian said with a smirk.

 

My heart leapt. I suddenly got a huge wave of anxiety as we began to go over things very similar to that of a few diaper-lover stories I had read on a few of the sites I visit online. It was almost… cliché. But I ignored it. I was happy and excited. I was also not stupid… because every time Brian opened his mouth, I knew he was a diaper-lover. Signs were coming to me…

 

“Okay… so you want us… to put one of these on, through dinner and stuff?” I asked.

 

He nodded his head vigorously.

 

“Well actually, wait. All of us are easier. How about only one of us puts one on, and if you chicken out… like, you have to take it off for whatever reason, until… we’re all up and ready to go to the clubhouse – then you have to do some really, really hard or messed up dare” Brian said, making a last minute revision.

 

Signs for me were still triggering in my head. What kind of messed up dare could there be?

 

“That sounds… interesting” Seth said.

 

“Okay, so how do we know who goes for the whole diaper-wearing thing all through tonight?” I asked.

 

Brian looked at me and looked at Seth, and looked at Daniel, too. But Daniel shook his head, like “Nope”, so I guess it was down to Brian, Seth, or me.

 

“Rock, papers, scissors” Brian said.

 

“Alright… fine. Sounds fair and reasonable” I said.

 

All three of us stuck our hands, as the tension began to build up a bit for me. I mean… I could end up in a diaper again, which I would love. But in front of Brian’s parents and stuff, and trying to keep it a secret… that’d be the challenge.

 

“Go!” Brian yelled.

 

We all tossed our figures in. I looked over at what Brian was firstly. Scissors. And then, I looked over at Seth. Paper. I looked down at my hand. It was paper. Brian won the first round, and got out.

 

“Tie-breaker” Brian said.

 

It was down to me and Seth.

 

Brian walked out of the circle with a cheesy, devilish grin, as he stood back to spectate. The pressure was back up for me again. I kind of got anxious again. I began to think of various scenarios. What if Brian’s parents found out I was wearing a diaper? I’d be humiliated. I’d have to tell them I had some problem or something… and they’d have that idea in my head.

 

As I set my hand in, I began to think of one more thing, something that kind of frightened me. I’m definitely not one to back down from a challenge, so if I lost, I would definitely do it. I have of course no problems wearing diapers, but then something occurred to me. I wasn’t allowed to take it off. What if I had to go to the bathroom? I wasn’t going to do it in front of them!

 

“Go!” Seth said.

 

I shut my eyes and did the first hand figure I could think of, and then, opened my eyes, to Seth’s hand.

 

“Scissors” I thought.

 

I looked down at my hand.

 

“Rock” I thought. I had won.

 

I took a sigh of relief as I confirmed that I had won… now Seth had to do it, and not me. I wasn’t ready yet. Something inside of me was nervous. Suddenly the silence in the room was broken by Brian’s laughter. I looked over and saw him chuckling a bit. He picked up the backpack, and then tossed it over to Seth… who didn’t look exactly 100 percent thrilled. But not upset, either: the usual Seth look, which was pretty much “Oh well, whatever”.

 

Seth caught the backpack in his arms, and shrugged.

 

“So now what” he said.

 

“Go put one on in the bathroom” Brian explained.

 

“Alright” Seth said, accepting his fate. He walked out of the room, shutting the door behind him, leaving Brian, myself, and Daniel in the room.

 

Daniel was on the top bunk as usual, pretty much doing nothing but hovering, so to speak. He was just kind of watching, not saying a word… like he always did. Those kinds of people intrigue me. They usually are an interesting person. And even if they aren’t, I still am left wondering exactly why they’re just standing there doing nothing.

 

Daniel often did a whole lot of nothing. He’s always with Brian though… with kind of a blank expression on his face. His eyes showed really no expression, either. He was pretty stone-faced, like he was constantly in some seriously deep thought. I mean… I did a lot of deep thinking but I usually at least show some form of emotion. He looked like he really didn’t care about anything, in the slightest.

 

I wouldn’t mess with him though. Definitely not. His blank expression was actually fairly intimidating… so was his stature. He was a bit over the athletic side. He looked like he did sports a lot… He wasn’t any football player; he wasn’t big like that at all. But he definitely looked like he worked out often.

 

Daniel was a good kid though. He just seemed like he wanted to do other things. He was a bit older than any of us (a year older than Brian) – so maybe that had something to do with it.

 

I didn’t want to stare at Daniel, so I instead, moved on to Brian, who was sitting on the floor, in front of the TV. My suspicions were increased now. I mean… I knew he said he wasn’t, but I guess it was the diaper-lover in me telling me otherwise.

 

That whole situation just totally blew my mind… I mean… I’ve been into the whole TB/DL scene for a little while now, and I’ve read quite a few stories, some true, some fiction. And I guess… I guess since then my mind has been acquainted with the obvious signs. I mean… it was so obvious now. But I kept my mouth shut. I wasn’t going to say anything. Not now… and maybe not for a while.

 

I couldn’t go through another disappointment like I did with Brian the first time, or Seth. That… and I don’t want to raise suspicion. But then I remembered the conversation Seth and I briefly had today… when Seth brought up the whole “Brian being ecstatic about diapers” thing.

 

But before I could give it anymore thought, I suddenly heard the doorknob turn, click, and then, saw the door open. It was Seth. He was wearing his backpack, rather than holding it, and was walking with a kind of noticeable waddle. And there was an ever-present slight crinkle each time he stepped. It wasn’t really going to be noticeable unless you’re looking or expecting it though… which was the case.

 

He still had that “whatever” thing going for him, wearing his hat crooked to the side and the blank expression in his eyes, with a faint smile. It wasn’t really a SMILE. It was more of a smirk, actually. But it was a smirk you could tell was unintentionally given. Seth had it a lot… like a lot of people around this town did. It was a smirk of ever-happiness.

 

It wasn’t a smirk like “I’m so happy to be wearing a diaper!” – it was more a diaper of “Wow, I’m really silly right now”.

 

You know… like, when you’re depressed a lot, you’ve got that look of depression in your eyes. Your mouth kind of always frowns automatically, just in the slightest. Seth and a lot of other people here had that happiness smirk, conceived from being happy a lot. I wondered if I had it, too.

 

You wearing it?” Brian said with a smirk.

 

“Yup” Seth said.

 

I examined Seth. I was looking for the signs that he was wearing a diaper. I mean, I knew for a fact he was. But I needed to know if all of those things you read in the stories online were true. There was a slight waddle. A faint crinkle, but not one that sounded like a plastic bag. I looked at his pants… though, I didn’t really want to. I felt kind of strange examining my friend’s crotch and ass area without his knowing… I felt kind of perverted, even though he was only a few months around my age.

 

There was a bulge. Not an immense bulge and probably not one you’d notice immediately unless you’re looking for it, but it was there. He had no curves in his butt area… it kind of got flat. Same with the front, it stuck out a bit further than normal.

 

“You think you can manage?” Brian said.

 

“Sure” he said.

 

“Hey guys! The pizza will be here in about forty-five minutes, okay?” we all suddenly heard coming from downstairs.

 

“Okay mom!” Brian yelled back.

 

“So what are we going to do?” I asked.

 

“Hmmm… well… let me think” Brian said, stretching a bit.

 

“We could uh… play Playstation 2 until the pizza gets here. A bit after that my mom should be sending us to bed. Then around… 1:30 or so, or whenever, we can sneak out to the club house for a few hours” Brian explained.

 

“Yeah… yeah that sounds about right” I agreed.

 

“Well alright then – who wants to get rocked first by me at something then!?” Brian said sarcastically.

 

“I call the sticks” Seth said.

 

“Me too” Brian said.

 

They were pretty much using another term for “I get to go first”. Those two shuffled over to the TV. Daniel was still up in his bunk and I was still sitting on the floor… though I got closer to them to let them know I wanted in next.

 

“I play winner” I called.

 

“Alright…” they said.

 

---

 

“Dude you’re so done” I taunted as I grabbed the controller.

 

Seth had lost the last battle, and it had been about 45 minutes since we started playing. We were just rotating…

 

“Yeah right man… you see that score? You see that 17-8 score?” Brian said taunted back.

 

“Yeah… what of it?” I said.

 

“Scores don’t lie, man… and the score is telling me that you’re gonna lose.” He said.

 

“Yeah? We’ll see about that” I replied.

 

We started the match. It was intense from the start, as I mashed my buttons to get the combos down. He won, though, the first round. Best two out of three. I worked a bit harder the second round, and beat him practically without taking damage. The third round was the most intense, but as it would surely seem…

 

“AHHH MAN!” Brian said.

 

…I had beaten him.

 

I laughed, and so did Seth, who was spectating the match from behind us.

 

“Here you go” Brian said, accepting his fate, handing Seth the controller.

 

“Alright man, hold on. I’ll be right back” Seth said, standing up with a crinkle.

 

He began walking towards the door, but stopped when Brian suddenly asked him something.

 

“Where are you going?” Brian said.

 

“I have to go to the bathroom” Seth said, opening the door.

 

Brian laughed.

 

“Uh… nope” he said.

 

Seth looked over at Brian, and I looked over at Brian, and Brian pretty much had nothing but a silly smile on his face, nodding a no.

 

“What? I can’t go to the bathroom?” Seth asked with an aggravated and kind of non-believing look.

 

“Nope” Brian confirmed.

 

“Come on man… I have to piss. I had a coke at the fair with Aden, you know what caffeine does” Seth whined.

 

Still though… Brian nodded a no.

 

Held the door open…

 

“And if I do?” Seth said.

 

“You’ll regret it” Brian assured.

 

“How?” Seth said.

 

Brian had an incredibly confident look on his face…

 

“Trust me. You don’t want to pee – you want to hold it.” Brian assured.

 

“Why? What are you going to do?” Seth said.

 

“Maybe I’ll have Daniel over there beat you up. Maybe not. But one thing is for sure… you don’t want to get the super-dare. Holding it will make your life better in the long run” Brian said in a very confident tone.

 

Seth looked at him unsure of what he was going to do. But he sighed, shook his head, and then shut the door, and walked back over to us.

 

“You win” Seth said.

 

Brian laughed.

 

But right then, right when Seth sat down…

 

“Pizza’s here!” we all heard.

 

“SWEET” Brian yelled happily.

 

He jumped up, and ran out of the room, and down the steps, leaving Seth and me alone… oh yeah, and Daniel, too. Seth kind of gave me a desperate look…

 

“What’s up” I said with a bit of a chuckle.

 

“Dude you have no idea how bad I have to piss right now” he said.

 

“Why didn’t you go before you put the diaper on?” I asked.

 

He shrugged… “I didn’t have to yet” he admitted.

 

---

 

Mmmm… this pizza is so good” Brian said as he stuffed a piece into his mouth.

 

It was his second piece. It was kind of disgusting, how fast he ate his first piece, considering I had only one bite of my first piece in my stomach. We were all sitting around the dining room table… I was sitting across from Seth and Daniel, and next to Brian. Brian’s and Daniel’s parents were sitting across from each other on the long ends of the table.

 

“Glad you like it” his father said with a smile.

 

I took a chomp out of my pizza… there wasn’t much conversing going on right now, so I didn’t say anything.

 

“SO Seth, Aden, what’d you two think of our fireworks display?” I heard Brian’s mom say.

 

“Oh it was very nice. Back in my old town we had displays, but they varied from year-to-year.” I explained.

 

“Yeah, same here, too. This year was pretty good.” Brian’s father said.

 

“How about you, Seth?” Brian’s father asked him.

 

I looked over at Seth, since I didn’t hear a response. He was staring off into space, his eyes big, and his mouth small. He wasn’t looking at anything… he was in his own little world.

 

“Seth?” Brian said, pushing on his shoulder.

 

“Huh? What?” Seth said, suddenly coming back to our plane.

 

“What’d you think of our fireworks display?” Brian’s dad said again.

 

“Oh. Uhh… it was pretty good… yeah. I liked it. Was very uh… ka-boomey, and erm… flashy…” he said.

 

But it was the way he said it that made me feel slightly bad for him. Or at least concerned. He was shuffling around in his chair as he said it. A lot. He spoke in an uneasy tone, and was doing the nervous-scratch on the side of his head (you know, where you kind of rub your temple or the side of your face with your hand).

 

I knew why… I knew what he had to do. I knew he was doing the “I need to pee right now” dance, but was trying to be discreet about it, and from the look of it… the look of desperation in his eyes, he had to go bad.

 

But no one else took notice of this. At least I don’t think so. I know for a fact that Brian’s parents didn’t…

 

The conversation continued and I saw Seth give kind of the examinant eye to Brian, Daniel, and me. Though… when he looked at me, I looked down. But once I knew he wasn’t looking anymore I rolled my eyes back up and stared at him. I monitored him. I felt kind of… well… I felt a sense of pity.

 

The talking in the background got drowned out because I was paying too much attention to Seth. I left a watchful eye on all of his actions. His eyes were desperate. His movements were nonstop and were in a very fluid motion. Later on, he began shaking his leg, and his hands started shaking very, very slightly. He went to pick up his pizza, and I could see that his strength was low. He was holding out – but it wasn’t easy. He had a look of, no longer needing to pee, but a look of agony.

 

He tried his best to hide it and I could tell. He started eating his slice of pizza, though only got about one down (I highly doubt he was hungry right now), and would occasionally laugh at something just to chime in.

 

I shook my head as I felt kind of bad for him… and just took another bite of my pizza. I didn’t know what to do. I wasn’t going to point it out… I wondered if I should say something to Brian, maybe.

 

I contemplated while eating a slice of pizza… and eventually added myself into the going conversation. But soon, quite soon, we all were stuffed.

 

---

 

“Okay guys, time for bed” we all heard.

 

Brian whined, and I did too… well kind of. I just moaned. We all walked out of the dining room, and into the living room, feeling our stomachs being overly full of pizza. I walked over to grab my bag, which was sitting on the living room floor (since I plopped it there when we went for pizza).

 

“Alright – you guys know the drill” Brian said to Seth and me, in a whisper.

 

I nodded, but Seth didn’t reply. Brian just shrugged, smirked, and Daniel and Brian were on their way upstairs. I looked around as I saw Seth again… he was leaning on the back of a chair, with both arms, facing down. His eyes were very open… his arms were twitching noticeably. His mouth was kind of open now, in a panting way… and he was sweating. This concerned me.

 

“Seth, are you okay?” I asked.

 

He looked at me… and nodded a no.

 

“I need to go… now. Right now.” Seth said.

 

“Well go break it to Brian that you can’t hold it man, it’s an extreme emergency. He’ll believe you, you’re sweating and panting!” I explained.

 

He nodded his head a no.

 

“I don’t know what Brian says he’ll do to me but I can most likely guarantee you it won’t be good…” he said.

 

I wanted to slap him.

 

“Dude – this is fucked” I said, whispering so that Brian’s parents didn’t hear me.

 

“You’ve got to go when you’ve got go. And you do. So go” I said.

 

He looked at me…

 

“Dude this is sheer fucking pain. I can’t take it. I’m going to go to the bathroom man. But don’t tell Brian” he pleaded.

 

“Chill man, I ain’t like that” I assured.

 

Seth nodded his head understandingly, and then, slowly, walked upstairs towards where the bathroom was, leaving me alone.

 

“You okay Aden?” I heard his mom say from behind me.

 

I turned around.

 

“Huh? Oh yeah – Seth and I were just talking for a second and he just went upstairs. I was about to go up there too” I explained.

 

“Oh, well… okay” she said to me.

 

I nodded, and then took my pack, and proceeded up the steps. The only light source I was given was that of the nightlights that were placed along the steps, and the one in the hall. The nightlight was all too familiar to me – it was the same nightlight I used as my guide through the hallway the first night I slept over here, as I was going into the bathroom… to put on a diaper for the first time. And from that moment on was history… the second I shut that door I sealed my fate as a diaper-lover. The lighting was just the same, too. It almost made me feel almost nostalgic. It made me remember when I first became a diaper-lover… when I was so nervous to put on a diaper just to prove myself to Brian, Daniel, and Seth.

 

I walked up the steps, through the hall, and stopped at the door and looked around. The bathroom door was shut, and there was light coming from underneath the door. I was satisfied to know that Seth was doing the right thing. I opened the bedroom door, and then proceeded inside, tossing my backpack next to the door (since I knew we were going to be leaving soon anyways).

 

Brian was already on his bunk, lying on his stomach, staring at me as I was coming in. I looked around and assumed Daniel was up on his top bunk, out of my view. I walked over to my usual sleep-over spot (which was at the bottom of the bunk bed, right next to the bottom bunk on the floor). There was already a blanket and a pillow waiting for me. I felt welcomed.

 

I laid down… there was nothing but a desk lamp on. But as soon as I laid down, I heard the click, and suddenly everything went black. There was no light except for the ever-familiar red numbers on the electric clock I was facing… I guess Brian turned off the desk lamp. I simply shut my eyes, and acted as though I was trying to sleep… the usual routine.

 

But it was only about a minute before I heard the door open again. I figured it was Seth coming back from the bathroom… so I didn’t bother looking. I continued to lay there with my eyes shut.

 

---

 

 It was silent. It was dark. I don’t know how long I was laying there. I wasn’t staring at the clock… I didn’t open my eyes to see it, either. I was too busy paying attention to the pictures in my head.

 

Pssst!” I heard. It was Brian.

 

Right then, the desk lamp flashed on, illuminating the room with that weird yellowish-orangey color.

 

“You guys all awake?” Brian said, whispering.

 

There was a bit of a lack in response… everyone kind of moaned or grunted. With the light now on, I sat up, and looked around. Seth was on the couch, lying there. I saw him… he was staring off again. He was staring off, into nothingness. His mouth was small, his eyes were big. He was staring dead ahead of him… into space. It wasn’t a face of… say… zoning-out. It was a more distinct expression that is really too difficult to explain without using one simple word. His face expressed… fear.

 

Aden, you awake?” I heard Brian say.

 

I looked over, and nodded.

 

“What about you Seth?” Brian said, looking over at Seth.

 

Seth still looked dead ahead… but did a barely noticeable nod.

 

“What about you Daniel?” Brian said.

 

“Uh-huh…” Daniel said from up on his bunk.

 

“Okay. You guys ready to go to the club house?” Brian asked.

 

We all kind of mumbled…

 

“Sweet” I said, laughing.

 

---

 

We all sat up… except for Seth… who was kind of sitting up in the first place. His head was up, since it was resting on the arm of the couch.

 

“So how long are we going to be out there for?” I asked.

 

Brian, who stood up from his bunk, shrugged. “I don’t know” he said.

 

“Until we fall asleep… or even if, we might end up falling asleep in the club house” he explained.

 

I didn’t mind either way.

 

“Won’t your mom care?” I asked.

 

Brian stopped and the expression on his face expressed that he was thinking…

 

“She and my dad don’t usually wake up until like… noon… on their days off” he explained.

 

“Oh” I said.

 

“Yeah… and tomorrow, they have off. So they’ll be sleeping in late” Brian explained.

 

“Oh… well… alright” I said.

 

“Yeah… but… we should hurry up so we can do more stuff out there” Brian said.

 

I looked around… by the door was my backpack, and by my backpack were my shoes. And on my feet, were my socks of course. So all I had to do was actually just put my shoes on, and I was ready to go…

 

…which I did. Brian put his shirt on, socks, and shoes, too. As did Daniel. It all took only about five minutes. I looked over at Seth… who kind of didn’t move since.

 

“Seth, you going to get ready?” I asked.

 

“Huh? Oh… yeah. Hold on” he said, sitting up.

 

As he was getting ready, Brian went over on getting out of the house one more time to freshen our memories… like we really needed refreshment.

 

“Okay… you guys all keep quiet… we sneak down the steps… we sneak out the backdoor, and I lock it with my key. We sneak through to the woods, keeping an eye out for the fuzz and before you know it, we’re there” he explained.

 

“…sounds about right…” I said.

 

“Alright, I’m ready” Seth said.

 

“Then let’s go” Brian said.

 

Seth stood up, and got with the rest of us… and in only a few seconds time, the room was once again dark, quiet, and motionless… as we left for the club house.

 

---

 

“Come on, keep us with us!” I begged Seth as we were running through the night at about 12AM.

 

It’s hard dude… running with a diaper isn’t easy…” he said.

 

We were gunning it through one of the more populated parts of the town, and since it was a holiday, there were more people out than usual.

 

Some people were even still firing off fireworks in the distance… we were just worried about someone seeing us, especially the cops. 12AM is definitely passed curfew. Not to mention the fact that it’s the 4th of July… and any police officer wouldn’t think of not looking in the backpacks of four teenagers, going into the woods, at 12AM… That would be bad… considering there were diapers there.

 

So we were all trying to be very cautious, and swift. But Seth kept falling back some.

 

“I understand that man… but come on…” I said, slightly frustrated.

 

Seth sighed a bit… I held his backpack as we both ran across a street into one of the alleyways we snuck through on our path to the clubhouse.

 

Seth began running a bit faster than me for a second though, but I was holding back to not leave him behind. He ran up to the side walk on the other side of the street, but as he did… I noticed something that caught my attention. It was his… his style of running.

 

It wasn’t a run. Nor was it a walk. It was more of a… limp. A limp, or a shuffle… to the side. When he ran he kind of hopped from one foot to the other side-to-side, forward (like hopscotch).

 

We both made it to the other side and caught up with Brian and Daniel, who signaled us to go through the alleyway. As we ventured through though, I noticed another thing about Seth. He did it when he walked, too, which he didn’t do before.

 

“Why are you walking like a duck?” I said with a bit of sarcasm.

 

But… maybe I shouldn’t have said that. Maybe I should have kept my mouth shut. Maybe I should have just… let it be. Because when I said that, and as I was looking at Seth to see or hear an expected sarcastic look, gesture, or statement back… he looked at me with a look I don’t think I will forget for the remainder of my days.

 

It was no angry face, frustrated face, or devious face. Nor was it one of confusion, sickness, and certainly not one of surprise. And by absolutely no means, in any dimension, was it one of happiness… It was one of absolute and complete sadness and fear. His eyes illuminated in the dark… they were glassy, and for a second you would have sworn you could have seen… tears, at the bottom of his eyelids.

 

He looked at me dead in my eyes, with his eyes of desperation, fear, anguish, and despair… for just one second. All I could see in the dim light of that alleyway were those two eyes. And for that one second I felt like my chest was lit on fire… and I think it was because of that look now that I believe that looks can kill. Because after he gave me that glare… I kind of wanted to die from guilt for whatever I just triggered inside of him.

 

---

 

The whole way to the clubhouse, which was about five more minutes, I couldn’t get it out of my head. I couldn’t stop thinking about what I had said, something so simple, and his reaction… something so indescribable and impossibly complex.

 

I wanted to ask him why. He walked ahead of me from that point forward… and I noticed that he was trying to walk straighter now. Something inside of me told me to let him be… either that or I was too scared to say anything.

 

But either way, we were soon at the club house. It was pitch black in the woods as we traveled through, but Brian and Daniel pretty much knew the way through by heart, so Seth and I followed them through, and in only a minute or two after breaching the border of the woods, we were standing at the foot of the clubhouse.

 

Brian opened the door and went in first, then Daniel, Seth, and finally myself. By the time I got in there, the candle was already lit… and everyone had their seats chosen.

 

---

 

I tossed my bag underneath the bench that was to the right of the door. It wasn’t the longest, since it was cut off from the doorway in the middle, but it was enough to lie down and rest. I placed my bag underneath it to keep it out of the way, and then, laid down on the bench, as everyone else pretty much sat around.

 

“Okay… so we’re here. Now what” I said.

 

Brian smiled.

 

“Can I pee yet?” Seth pleaded.

 

Suddenly Brian started laughing.

 

“OH YEAH!” Brian said with a big cheesy grin.

 

“Yeah man, go outside and pee.” Brian said.

 

Seth slowly rose from his seat and quietly left the club house. Seeing him kind of reminded me of the look… but it really never left my mind. I knew he already peed, and I knew he was just trying to play it for Brian and Daniel.

 

I took a breath of air in through my mouth… I felt bad for saying that. I did something to Seth I didn’t mean to do… that I still don’t know what I did. I felt compelled to go apologize or see what it was all about.

 

“Hey, I have to go pee, too” I lied.

 

Brian shrugged.

 

“Go ahead man” Brian said.

 

I got up from the bench, taking the backpack with me (it was habit from being paranoid about people going through and taking my stuff) and stretched a bit. I took in another breath of air through my mouth, and walked outside.

 

It was real dark outside… I had shut the door so there was really no light source but the moon and the distant headlights from the streets in the distance. They had built the clubhouse on a small stretch of flat land… it was flat for a while around the area. No trees, no hills… it was very convenient. I looked around, trying to find even a silhouette of Seth in the woods. But I couldn’t… where he was, was completely beyond me.

 

I made sure to distance myself from the clubhouse after a few moments.

 

“Seth!” I whispered.

 

“Seth, its Aden!” I called, making kind of loud whisper.

 

I looked around, through the trees. Maybe he was acting like he was peeing behind a tree or something. I scanned the perimeter around the clubhouse… the trees, the flat section immediately around the clubhouse… no good.

 

I thought this may have been a pretty elaborate way to trick Brian… maybe a bit too elaborate. I knew he wasn’t really peeing, so where could he have been?

 

I stopped for a second after giving up, sighed… and kind of slid down the trunk of a tree. I was feeling kind of weird… I thought for a moment, letting myself think for just a few seconds, until I forced myself back up. I was just going to go back to the clubhouse.

 

I stood up, and began walking towards the clubhouse. But suddenly, as I was walking towards the house, I heard a distant sound. A sound that stood out from the usual late-night forest ambience. It was not the crickets, nor was it the sound of the distant creek. It was a crinkle. A loud crack of a crinkle that caught my attention immediately.

 

I stopped walking, and looked around… I couldn’t find anything. I slowly crept towards the direction I thought I had heard the sound come from… it was to my right, in a patch of trees. It was much darker there than the other areas I had checked… there were no windows on that side of the clubhouse that the sound had came from, so there was no illumination from the candlelight.

 

I didn’t say anything… out of kind of fear, and I just didn’t… it was kind of an automatic reflex. Which I guess was pretty stupid… I mean… you hear a strange sound coming from the dark section of trees, in the middle of the woods. You have no gun, no knife, and are an innocent 14 year old. Of course, you walk towards the sound without presenting yourself.

 

But I wasn’t thinking straight anyway. I crept toward the trees. I heard some rustling suddenly… Eventually I had made it to the trees. I was pretty tense… I was all too curious to what the sound was. I was positive it was Seth but it sounded like he was doing a whole lot more than just sitting around pretending.

 

But it was too dark to see… I thought for a moment… and then decided to use my flashlight. I took my backpack off of my back, and rustled through my spare clothes and some games, a few diapers, and finally my flashlight.

 

And finally… I saw it: the silhouette of someone standing before me only a few feet away. I took my flashlight, aimed it at the body before me… and clicked the light…

 

---

 

“Turn off the light!” I heard Seth say.

 

I was facing him, with my eyes big. My mouth dropped. My fingers too paralyzed to click that switch that would have blinded me from seeing what I was seeing. It wasn’t exactly anything too exceptional… but I was too shocked from the surprise.

 

Facing me with a look like a deer in the headlights, was Seth. He was wearing nothing but a shirt, a diaper, and a pair of pants that were down to his ankles. The shirt was short… the diaper was completely visible. The whole front. The whole diaper… was also yellow.

 

Suddenly he launched himself at me, which kind of knocked me to the ground. He took the flashlight and turned it off. I still didn’t say anything.

 

Your… your diaper” I began to say…

 

“Shut up!” Seth ordered with a desperate cry.

 

I was lying on the ground, Seth was over me. I slowly rose to my feet and faced him… but he backed off a few steps.

 

“Just… shut up…” Seth said.

 

“Seth… what happened?” I asked.

 

My chest was on FIRE! I couldn’t BELIEVE this!

 

“You’re going to tell Brian. You’re going to think this is all a good joke tonight with everyone else. I can’t deal with it. I won’t” Seth began to say with an angry tone of voice.

 

“W-what?” I shockingly said.

 

“You! Do you just come back here to watch people take pisses in the woods?” Seth said with an angry tone.

 

“I thought you went back at the house!” I said.

 

He looked at me…

 

“Daniel was there…” he said.

 

It didn’t take the little spark of electricity passing through a string of filament to show me that Seth was beginning to cry. I could hear the slight whimper and the sniffing…

 

“…oh…” I understandingly said.

 

“So that’s why you were walking like that…” I understandingly said.

 

I saw the silhouette before me drop a bit, along the side of a tree. He slid down it, until he was sitting against it.

 

“I’m sorry” I said.

 

“It hurt so bad… it wasn’t like needing to pee anymore. It was pain.” Seth said…

 

“Seth. I don’t… I understand… I’m sorry… It’s okay” I said. I couldn’t think of anything to say as I saw him break down and cry only a few steps from me.

 

“No it’s not” Seth replied…

 

“Yeah it is man” I convinced.

 

He shook his head…

 

“Brian is going to see. You’ll tell him or something… he’ll see me wearing no diaper, or worse, see me in a pissed in one… he’ll think this is just hilarious a-and I’ll never live this down!” Seth said.

 

“Seth – I’m not going to tell anyone. I swear” I said.

 

I really couldn’t think of anything to say, or do. The only thing I could think of… I did. I got down onto my knees, and reached over, and put both of my hands on both of Seth’s shoulders, and looked at him. He looked up at me, and for a few seconds… our faces were only a few inches from each other. We were practically breathing the same air, and each other’s exhales. I looked at his eyes, his desperate, fearful, and tear filled eyes stared back at mine…

 

“It’s okay” I said.

 

He sniffed.

 

“Listen” I said, shaking his shoulders a bit.

 

He sniffed again.

 

“Brian or Daniel won’t see a thing. The only ones who will now anything about this are me. And you. I promise. Do you understand me?” I said.

 

He blinked, sniffed… and nodded his head.

 

“…but what will I do?” Seth said.

 

“We will get you in a different diaper. You will change yourself; I’ll get you one that’s clean. We’ll go in there like nothing happened, okay?” I said.

 

He nodded…

 

“Okay… hold on” I said, taking my hands from his shoulders, and my face away from his.

 

I stood up… and thought. And contemplated. How was I going to get a diaper? Then it hit me. There was only one way… I looked back… and saw him kneeling down in the dirt, in nothing but a short shirt and a wet diaper, with a wet face and tear-filled eyes.

 

I faced away, took my backpack… and began to dig through.

 

“What are you doing?” Seth mumbled. I didn’t respond.

 

I felt around… and felt one diaper.

 

Was I really prepared for this? Was I really willing to do this? To blow myself out of the water… to reveal myself a bit, and show Seth that I had diapers in my backpack? He was in no position to judge… but this was a pretty heavy thing to do.

 

“This is it” I thought.

 

“…but I have to do it” I thought.

 

I took in a deep breath, and pulled out one of the diapers from my backpack.

 

“Here” I said.

 

His eyes blew up a bit.

 

“Why do –“ Seth began to go on…

 

“Don’t tell Brian. Don’t tell Daniel. Don’t tell anyone – or I won’t return the favor” I said, laying down the law.

 

“…okay…” Seth said giving me a strange look.

 

“Here – take it” I said, shaking it again.

 

“…okay…” Seth said once more, taking the diaper from my hand.

 

I froze for a moment… before going back.

 

“Look, I know this is weird having this in my bag. But this is the only one. We’ll talk later” I explained.

 

I turned around, and started walking in the opposite direction, but only a few steps. I could hear the tapes tearing from the diaper’s front, and the crinkling of him balling the diaper. I heard some rustling, some more crinkling, the sounds of the tapes, and in a few minutes…

 

“It’s safe” I heard him say.

 

I turned around, and there was Seth, standing as though he wasn’t even wearing a diaper. He had his hat to the side, his pants up. Buttoned and zipped, with his shirt pulled down. His shoes were tied and his socks were adjusted. He looked fine.

 

“Okay, you ready?” I said.

 

He nodded. I turned around to start walking back, trying to forget that I had just blown myself out of the water to help him.

 

“Wait” Seth said… making my heart kind of sink.

 

“…I don’t know why you did what you did, or why you could in the first place… like why you had it in your backpack and stuff… and I guess I won’t ask. I won’t tell anyone either, okay?” Seth said from behind me.

 

I nodded, and turned around.

 

“Okay” I said. I was confident in his word.

 

“Oh…” Seth said.

 

He walked up close to me, and we were once again face to face, alone in the woods. Surrounded by darkness, with nothing but the ambience of the crickets, the distant creek, the vague echoes of fireworks cracking the distance…

 

“…thank you…” he said, putting his head down.

 

“…no problem Seth” I said, smiling…

 

There was silence…

 

“Let’s go” I said.

 

“Yeah” he agreed.

 

 

“Chapter Sixteen, Happy 4th of July… Baby Aden

 

 

I don’t know why I did what I did. I don’t know why I threw myself out like that. I don’t know why I decided to put myself in a worse position than Seth would have been. I just practically did something in such a style that I wouldn’t have ever preferred. I just exposed myself to Seth… but why…

 

Maybe it was because I couldn’t stand to watch him crying like that. So fearful over the simple reaction that Brian and Daniel would have given… laughter. I could see it. I could feel his fear.

 

He was too scared for me to not have done something about it. I would’ve been, too… which I couldn’t lie about. I gave him one of the diapers from my backpack because I couldn’t stand the thought of someone like Seth being miserable… suffering… crying… humiliated.

 

Someone who is so always happy and filled with life was brought to their knees because he feared one thing: the reaction to someone else. This concept blew my mind. Brian and Daniel were understanding people. Seth had a legitimate reason behind his accident. But he still was scared shitless and was crying like a baby for help. And I was the only one available. I was the only one there. I was the only one. It was the only thing I could do. I wouldn’t have lived with myself if I wouldn’t have done it…

 

He deserved better than to live humiliated that night. I couldn’t let it go. I couldn’t have. It’s against my person. It’s against my personal religion. It’s against my way of life. I can’t ever live knowing I could have stopped someone else from suffering… even if it meant to put myself out there, in the open.

 

---

 

My walk back into the clubhouse felt like it took hours rather than a few short seconds as Seth and I walked into the clubhouse.

 

“Well it took you two long enough!” Brian said.

 

“Huh?” I said, playing it entirely up.

 

“It took you two like five minutes to piss” Brian said.

 

“What’s the rush?” I said.

 

“Uh… the night is only a few hours long...” Brian reminded.

 

“It wasn’t exactly a fast process to take a diaper off, pee, and put one back on in the pitch blackness” Seth made up.

 

“Hmm… I suppose…” Brian shrugged.

 

“So you’re wearing one still… show it!” Brian said with a cheesy grin.

 

Seth sighed, pulled his shirt up and held the bottom with his chin, and pulled down his pants and boxers, revealing the diaper.

 

My heart was racing a bit. There was that little voice in me yelling that Brian will know that it’s a new one.

 

Okie-dokie” Brian said.

 

I let out a breath of relief.

 

“Okay… so… here’s what’s going down” Brian said, stretching out a bit, cracking his fingers.

 

“Seth did his dare… who’s up… Aden” Brian said, pointing at me.

 

“Uh… okay” I said.

 

I sure was wrong!

 

“Here” Brian said, pulling out a diaper.

 

He tossed the diaper to me, and said “Put this on”.

 

“Uh… where?” I asked.

 

“Outside” Brian instructed.

 

I sighed…

 

“Okay” I said.

 

I turned around, opened the door, and walked outside with the diaper in hand.

 

“This shouldn’t be too hard…” I thought. I had done it to myself enough times that I knew how to do it pretty well by now.

 

I spotted the area with my naked eyes, unable to see very far. But my eyes were still adjusted to the dark pretty well from being outside with Seth a few minutes ago. I looked around, and decided to go back to the spot that Seth and I were at a few moments ago…

 

I walked over, looked around… and lied down pretty near where Seth did. I looked around once more out of habit, and finally unzipped and unbuttoned my pants, and pulled them down to my ankles (and my boxers, too)…

 

With crinkles that surely broke the silence of the woods in half, I unfolded the disposable diaper, lifted my butt up, and slid the diaper underneath it. I rested myself on top of it, and pulled the front of the diaper over top of my diaper-area. I pulled the tapes, and placed both sides of the diaper securely onto the front of my diaper, securing it.

 

I quickly pulled my clothes back up, brushed myself off… and walked back into the clubhouse.

 

---

 

You wearing it?” Brian asked me.

 

I rolled my eyes…

 

“Yeah” I said.

 

“Can I see?” he asked.

 

I sighed… and pulled down my pants a bit, revealing the top of the diaper.

 

“Okay!” he said.

 

I shrugged non-caringly, and walked over to my bench, sat down, and relaxed… closing my eyes, not caring about what was going to happen next. I couldn’t give less mind to wearing diapers at the moment… I was more concerned about what I had done, what will happen, and other stuff of that sort. I was definitely not in the best of moods.

 

“That’s not the whole dare you know” Brian said.

 

“…okay…” I said, still non-caringly.

 

“You okay Aden?” Brian asked.

 

I realized I was being a bit rude, unintentionally of course, and was kind of taking it out on the wrong person.

 

“Yeah man, sorry… just uh… getting a bit of a headache” I lied.

 

“Oh… okay, sorry to hear that. If you start getting sick or something, just tell me okay? We’ll go back home” Brian said, smiling kindly.

 

“Thank you, I will if I do” I said, closing my eyes and going back into my own world of thoughts.

 

“Hmmm… well, since Aden kind of can’t do a dare right now, and since Seth hasn’t done his, Daniel, you want to go?” I heard Brian say.

 

I heard no words…

 

“How come?” I heard Brian say.

 

“I’m done with this stuff man, you know that. I told you” I heard Daniel say.

 

“Oh… okay.” I heard Brian say.

 

“No, it’s fine. I’ll go” I said, opening my eyes, cracking my joints, and sitting up (since I was lying down on the bench before).

 

“You sure?” Brian asked.

 

“Yeah” I assured.

 

“Okay, well, as for the dares thing… I have to discuss something to you guys, this part will be part of all dares we do tonight” Brian began.

 

This sounded a bit odd… so I began to listen a more carefully.

 

“What?” Seth asked.

 

Brian kind of shrugged, and began to reach into his backpack.

 

“Keep in mind, if you back down… this kind of counts against the dares, if you don’t let me do this” Brian said.

 

“What is it?” I asked.

 

He smirked a bit devishly

 

“I hope none of you are too…” Brian began, pushing around through his backpack.

 

“…camera shy” Brian finished, finally pulling out what looked to be a small, digital camera.

 

“…what?” I asked.

 

“I’m going to take pictures of this” Brian said.

 

“Uh… hah… no” I said, almost completely at the same time Seth said no.

 

“Come on guys!” Brian said.

 

“Dude no, come on.” Seth said.

 

“Why not?” Brian said.

 

“Why would you!?” I said.

 

Brian kind of looked up like he was thinking, but then shrugged.

 

“I dunno, I thought it would be funny and would kind of add to the intensity of things. And think of THIS… whenever we stop doing these things or whatever you know, you have stuff to look back on!” Brian said, smiling a bit, clearly trying to change our opinions.

 

We both were silent…

 

“So what, you’re going to take pictures of us in diapers? And just us? That’s kind of ironic…” I said.

 

“No no! Me too!” Brian said with a giddy tone.

 

I sighed out of frustration, and rested back on the wall of the clubhouse…

 

“…do we really have to?” I asked in desperation.

 

“…well… no I guess not. I just… dunno… thought it’d be a fun twist” Brian said.

 

I shook my head…

 

“Where’d you get a camera from, anyway?” I asked.

 

“Daniel and I… we got it from my Dad earlier this summer. I haven’t used it too much, was hoping to use it tonight” he said.

 

“Well… what if someone sees them!?” Seth says.

 

Brian laughed in return…

 

“No one will see them… there’s no one TO see them that we hang out with anyway, out of school” Brian said.

 

“…but you guys don’t have a computer, why do you have digital?” I remarked.

 

“Yeah we do. It’s in just not in our room. Its in the living room… you never noticed it?” Brian said.

 

“…well… uh… actually, no. I never have” I said, slightly dumfounded.

 

“Hah… so yeah.” Brian remarked.

 

“I don’t know man… I just don’t feel comfortable with you not only taking pictures of me in a diaper, and then having the ability to give it to anyone you please. I’m not saying you will, I just have a weird anxiety thing.” I said.

 

He looked at me… he had an understanding look, but he looked like he was contemplating or thinking something.

 

“Well… if you really feel that way I can give you the pictures afterwards, and you can keep them on your computer” Brian said.

 

I could see there was no arguing. I could see that there was no point in arguing. I could see that it would all get me no where… I sighed…

 

“Fine” I said, in a giving-up manner.

 

“Okay, deal?” Brian said in a confirming tone.

 

“Yeah, ok-“ I BEGAN to say…

 

“WHOA” we both heard, breaking my sentence. It was Seth.

 

“Why does he get to have the pictures? I’m going to be in there, too!” Seth said.

 

A wave of desperation and frustration, and all kinds of “–ations” came over me. Why couldn’t Seth just have left his mouth shut? Why couldn’t he have just let me take the pictures onto my computer? It would have all ended there, we’d get through the night… and it’d be that simple.

 

I personally did not want him to have the pictures, though... so I objected.

 

“So? So is Brian” I said.

 

“Yeah man, so what?” Brian asked.

 

“I don’t know man. I don’t want you guys having the opportunity to, at anytime, accidentally or intentionally, just show someone me in a diaper” he said.

 

“Well man, it’s Aden. You can trust Aden… not like you couldn’t trust me.” Brian explained, but Seth wouldn’t hear it.

 

“I say you guys let me have them” Seth argued, but I wouldn’t hear it.

 

“C’mon man, just let me have them and it’ll be all over with. Who am I going to show them to?” I said.

 

“Anyone.” Seth replied.

 

“I GOT IT!” we both suddenly heard, breaking our argument. It was Brian.

 

“Well see a doctor and get rid of it. Anyways, dude, I’m ridiculously careful and stuff with my com-“ I began to say.

 

“No! I HAVE the answer to this stupid argument!” Brian interrupted.

 

“…what” I said.

 

“We’ll make a game. How about this, since I really don’t care who has them, I trust you both thoroughly, we’ll split you two up. When you do a dare, you get a point. Whoever has the most points by the time we’re done gets custody and responsibility of the pictures.” Brian said.

 

I contemplated what Brian had said. This… actually really WAS the answer to the whole argument. Fair, simple, to the point and… actually pretty fun. This sounded fine.

 

“Fine. Alright, I’m alright with that. What about you, Seth?” I said.

 

I looked over… his arms were crossed and his face made him look stubborn. He looked at me angrily, and at Brian, too. He sighed…

 

“Fine. Whatever… yeah. I guess” he said, frustrated.

 

He sat down at his bench, and sighed…

 

“I still think it’s stupid but I’m not in any mood to really argue at the moment… so whatever, yeah” he whined.

 

I looked over at him… he was feeling poorly about the whole thing between he and I, too. This… kind of put me at ease… only a little bit though.

 

“Sweet, guys… this’ll be fun as hell” Brian said excitedly.

 

But I was thinking otherwise, and I knew Seth was too. I mean, call me crazy… but after what I had just gone through with Seth… I really wasn’t in the mood for diapers… I actually wasn’t in much mood to be sitting there, with them, in that club house. I wanted to be alone. I wanted to be home. I wanted to think and not end up ruining Brian’s fun. I wanted to think to ease my own anxiety. I wanted to think to conceive some sort of explanation for Seth. I wanted to have some time to think… to myself.

 

There was a bit of a pit of fire in my chest… that familiar burning I felt at the park so long ago. The familiar burning I felt when I was so incredibly depressed at my house, when I missed my mom. I was beginning to get accustomed to this small burning sensation in my chest. My mind was racing, that fire was burning, I felt like crying but I couldn’t. I wanted to scream but the thought was too absurd to attempt, at 2AM in the morning on the 4th of July, in the middle of the woods, where the only company present was three other similarly-aged teenagers like myself, who were all completely oblivious to this fire that was driving me insane.

 

This was a feeling I was beginning to despise with a passion. I’ve felt it all too many times. It starts small, and then grows vigorously. A pressure builds behind my eyes; they begin to burn a bit… its hard to swallow. My heart races, my mind sprints, both running in place, yet both lose. My breathing becomes deeper and harder because I can’t breathe at a normal pace. My thoughts are absurd, exaggerated, but seem like the truth. I want to break down and cry, but I can’t. I want to be alone… but I want to just have someone who understands what the answer is to a question that I can’t even identify. I start thinking everyone is watching me, start thinking their out to get me… when I know that this literally isn’t the case. It’s like a battle of some massive emotions versus my morality and common sense.

 

…this is all very new to me, but has been hitting me hard for the last two months. On and off… and I can’t explain it.

 

I tried my best to ignore it… but it was hard. I figured it would run its course like it does every other time this has happened. I breathed in and out, looked over at Brian and Seth… and somewhat calmly said…

 

“…we going to go and get started or we just sit here and talk about it?” with a joking tone.

 

After all, I DID have this thing to take care of. I needed to get these pictures taken care of, and then everything would run its course. Then I could sleep, go home… and contemplate.

 

Brian laughed a bit, Seth was soundless, and I was growing impatient.

 

“Well, it IS the 4th of July. We can’t go out and do that stuff up there. We have to do it all down here or out in the woods… but I really don’t think much will happen in the woods. Let’s just do stuff in here. Its closed, safe, warm, and well-lit… you know?” Brian explained.

 

“Alright” I concurred.

 

“So… let me think here… I’ll keep count and be camera-man. Seth’s dare wasn’t pictured, and doesn’t count towards score… and Aden has yet to do his completely. So he’ll go first.” Brian explained.

 

“Okay…” I said.

 

I really didn’t care…

 

“Okay. So, first… Aden… I dare you… to… hmmm…” Brian said, contemplating.

 

“I dare you to take off your clothes, in just a diaper, and let me take a picture” Brian said.

 

I shrugged, sighed, and began to take my clothes off. It was only a few moments before I was standing before Daniel, Seth, and Brian, in nothing but that teen-sized disposable diaper.

 

…this made me a bit more alert. But not too much. This hadn’t been the first time… I’ve grown accustomed to being in nothing but a diaper in front of them by now. But having a picture of me did alert me a bit.

 

I looked at the camera, did not smile nor did I pose. I stood there uncaringly, with a blank expression on my face, staring into the camera.

 

“Okay, here we go!” Brian said.

 

I continued my blank expression of uncaring-ness. Suddenly within a few moments, there was a flash, and then a beep. Brian looked at the back of the camera, chuckled, and said “Okay, 1 point for Aden!”

 

---

 

“Are we almost done?” I wondered.

 

It had been about thirty minutes… the last 1800 seconds seemed like a long, stretch of uneventful waste-of-life, that all blurred together. I zoned out most of the time. Brian gave us an order, Seth or I followed mindlessly.

 

The score was 5-5.

 

“Okay guys… I have 6 pictures on here. I have plenty of more room. I think its time to bust out what bringing everyone out here tonight was really about” Brian said.

 

“Huh?” I moaned. This caught my attention… but I wasn’t too eager or zealous about hearing that there was even MORE thrilling excitement to happen.

 

“Okay… so… you two are fine with diapers, right? You two are fine with the camera… more than you were like a half-hour ago I guess. I think its time to get you guys into some competition” Brian said.

 

We sat there, both in nothing but diapers, staring at Brian emotionless, silent, and uncaringly.

 

“This dare is for Aden… since Seth just went” he said, as he looked at the two of us, while reaching into the backpack that was on his lap.

 

I didn’t flinch.

 

“I don’t want to hear any protesting after I show you guys this stuff! Remember, whoever wins gets to have the pictures!” Brian said.

 

We still were silent.

 

Welp! Okay… Aden… I dare you…” Brian said.

 

I still wasn’t caring. Only paying half attention, even.

 

“…to put this on, and use this stuff, too, and pose!” Brian said.

 

This caught my attention. And what he did next REALLY caught my attention. As a matter of fact… what he pulled out, and tossed at me, actually made my heart skip a beat. They were not diapers. They were not anything of the sort.

 

…they were babies’ things!

 

He tossed to me what looked like a pacifier, and a bib, and a baby’s bottle too! They all plopped onto the floor, at my feet… as I stood motionless.

 

“W-what?!” I said.

 

He chuckled…

 

“Where the hell did you get that stuff” I said in awe. This was almost… too cheesy to be real.

 

This is the kind of stuff that only happened in stories I’ve read online, in stories about other teen babies… not in reality!

 

“I bought them… like last week” he explained.

 

I was silent.

 

“I thought of the idea of diapers and baby’s stuff when I saw an ad for diapers and stuff on TV – I thought it’d be a funny idea!” Brian said with a big cheesy grin.

 

“…well get to it!” Brian said.

 

I was still a bit too shocked to move, from the suddenness, the convenience, and the irony. I looked down at the pacifier, and the bib, and the bottle, in awe. This seemed almost too… ironic to be real, that I was to use baby’s things a week or so after I labeled myself a teen baby, somewhat.

 

Did Brian know? How could he? What were his intentions? The pictures!? Was it a plot?! My anxiety/depression swing was moving in fast, my heart still pounding hard and fast, my mind still racing too quickly to catch up with. I was losing it again.

 

“…o-okay” I mumbled.

 

It was hard. It was damn hard. But I tried. I picked up the bib, looked at Seth, who had a bit of an awkward expression in his eyes, and then Brian, who looked devious and happy with a cheesy smile. I looked at Daniel, who wasn’t paying much attention… he was just lying there on the bench, looking as though he was almost asleep, but overall uninterested.

 

I looked down at the bib in my hands… and examined it. It had no Velcro; it came together by tying two strings around the neck it seemed. I looked down at the prints on the front portion… it was white in the background, but in the front, featured Winnie The Pooh prints… a show I watched occasionally as a younger child. There was a red lining that moved around the actual bib, and connected with the strings… so altogether the bib was red and white with Winnie the Pooh prints. I sucked up the anxiety, depression, and various other minor emotions (confusion), and put the bib around my neck. I did my best to tie the bib on myself, which wasn’t all that hard to do myself.

 

When I finally accomplished putting the bib on, I looked down at the pacifier, reached down, and grabbed it… I examined it, too. It was sapphire blue with a bright red ring… the nipple was clear, or from what I’ve heard it’s called from websites I visit, silicon. Something about it attracted me… I guess it was tapping into my inner-teen baby. Some characteristic about it was tempting me… though I didn’t know what.

 

I sucked up my pride, once again… since dressing up like a baby, and having it documented, in front of my three best friends, wasn’t exactly comfortable – and placed the silicon nipple of the pacifier into my mouth, and held it in place with my lips. I wasn’t exactly sucking on it… was just holding it in my mouth, like people do with a cigarette.

 

I looked up at Brian, now fairly dressed up as a baby. He of course, was smiling giddily.

 

Aww… look at the cute lil’ Baby Aden!” he teased.

 

This… made my heart stop. I fire blazing out of control in my chest once again… not like it never stopped, but this was a different kind of fire. One you feel when you’re embarrassed.

 

“Just take the damn picture!” I said.

 

He laughed, held the camera up to his face… and suddenly there was a flash, and a beep. He pulled it from his face, looked down at the screen on the back of the camera… and started chuckling.

 

“All done! Hand the bib to Seth – it’s his turn” Brian said.

 

“Alright” I said.

 

I reached behind me, and began pulling on the knot I had made to hold it in place… it came apart and I slipped it off of me, and handed it to Seth.

 

Seth, looked at it, and me, and had a very sheepish face as I held it to him. He breathed in hard, and reached out for it. He took the bib from my hand, and I looked back at Brian… realizing I still had the pacifier in my mouth.

 

“What about this?” I said to Brian.

 

“What about it? Hah… I hope you don’t think you’re giving that to Seth, too. I have another one in here; it came in a pack of two. You can just put that on your bench so you don’t give the wrong one to Seth or use the wrong one” he said, laughing.

 

I felt embarrassed yet again…

 

“Well, okay Seth – it’s your turn” Brian announced, tossing another pacifier from his backpack at him. I cracked my fingers, stretched, and sat down on my bench to watch.

 

He examined the bib, as well… and put it on hesitantly like I did. He looked… awkward. It was a strange expression on his face… one of regret, almost. One of shock, and fear, as well. His eyes were big, his mouth was small, and his body was still as he slowly and hesitantly tied the bib around his neck.

 

He carefully looked at the pacifier in his hand… and slowly stuck it in his mouth. He looked at the camera afterwards, with that expression on his face, still.

 

There was a quick flash, a beep, and finally, Brian looked at it and nodded.

 

---

 

The score was 10-10.  It had been… an hour… of us enduring our little game that we didn’t want to play.

 

“Brian how much more do we have to do this stuff, I’m getting tired” I whined.

 

“Hmmm… you’re right… I am too… AND the camera only has like one more picture available” he explained.

 

I yawned. I was exhausted… bored… I just wanted to stop. The little ball in my stomach was slowly fading but only because it was being drowned in boredom… and other such emotions.

 

“Can we PLEASE finish this up, Brian? I’m tired, too” Seth whined, too.

 

We were both tired… and were both impatient.

 

“Yeah, yeah… sure… someone think of one last dare for this last picture, and we’ll call it a night and get some sleep” Brian concluded.

 

I sighed impatiently, as I fell back onto the bench behind me. Seth shrugged, and fell back onto his bench.

 

“Can’t think of anything?” Brian asked.

 

“Nope” I said non-caringly.

 

There was a horrifying silence between all of us. Daniel was asleep, Seth and I wish we were, and Brian looked as though he was too. There were no sounds in the distance anymore, of domestic-grade fireworks being lit off. There weren’t even too many crickets awake anymore. The sound of the distant creek was blocked out by the wooden walls surrounding us… it was absolutely silent when we weren’t talking. This made me all the more tired.

 

I had not forgotten about the dares, however. I had not forgotten about the fact that I MUST have those pictures… so that Seth never, ever had the chance to blackmail me with anything. Not that I feel he would… but I have just strange anxieties where I can’t allow anyone the chance to do something like that.

 

“I tell you what” Brian said.

 

“Since we’re all tired. We’re all exhausted, we’re all in dire need of some sleep…” Brian said.

 

“Uh huh…” I mumbled.

 

“How about this. I give you two the camera. You two will try to stay up as long as possible. Whoever goes to bed first loses. The one still awake, takes a picture of the other asleep, gives it to me in the morning, and that settles this” Brain said.

 

I contemplated. But there was little time contemplating since I eventually just said…

 

“Fuck it… yeah, fine. That’s fine” I said.

 

“Seth?” Brian asked, checking for his opinion.

 

“Yeah… alright…” Seth said.

 

“Cool. And now, here’s the camera” Brian said, putting the camera down, between Seth and I, onto the floor.

 

“Here’s the power button, here’s the button to take a picture” Brian explained.

 

We both examined and listened to Brian, since one of us were going to use it.

 

“Okay…” we both said understandingly.

 

“Alright? If you two got that, I’m going to go to bed” Brian said.

 

“Okay…” we both said.

 

“See you guys tomorrow” Brian said, waving, and laying onto his bench, across from mine.

 

He laid his head down, onto his backpack, and stretched a little bit… and then crawled up into a bit of a ball, facing away from us.

 

Seth and I were once again, facing eye to eye. It was he and I, competing to try to stay up the longest… but the look on his showed me that he wasn’t quite ready to compete. He just wanted to go to bed, like me.

 

His eyes were half shut… his mouth was barely, just barely open… his head was nodding downwards occasionally… he was tired alright.

 

---

 

He and I watched each other’s faces… each other’s movements… scanning each other like a predator on its prey.

 

I don’t know how long it had been. I don’t know how many minutes had passed since Brian had gone long to sleep. It had been just us two, staring at each other eye-to-eye for God knows how long.

 

I don’t know what was going through Seth’s mind. I don’t know what he was feeling… besides immense fatigue, of course. But I know what I was feeling… frustration.

 

I looked over at Brian, who was curled into a ball, facing away from us, fast asleep. Daniel was, as well. I breathed in deeply. The night was almost at an end… I wanted it to end now, though. But this was only prolonging an unwanted experience.

 

I looked over at him… and started thinking about how much I just wanted to be alone. How much I wanted to go home. How badly I wanted that at the moment. I remembered the unforgettable thing I had done for Seth only a few hours ago… and suddenly thought of something.

 

I stood up suddenly, stretching, and moaning a bit as my joints cracked.

 

“What are you doing?” Seth asked me, in a whispery tone.

 

I looked over at him…

 

“Come here” I said.

 

“Huh?” he replied.

 

“C’mon, let’s go outside for a second. I need air.” I said.

 

“…oh… o-okay” he replied.

 

I smirked and shrugged, bent down, and grabbed the camera from my feet.

 

I breathed in, quietly opened the door, and stepped out into the woods, with Seth following.

 

The air was so crisp now… and surprisingly chilly for a July night. I heard Seth quietly shut the door behind us, and we both walked into the open area in front of the clubhouse.

 

“It’s a nice night tonight” I said, just starting conversation.

 

“…y-yeah…” Seth said.

 

“What’s wrong?” I said.

 

“Huh? Oh… nothing” he said.

 

I knew what was bothering him. I felt it, too. We both just wanted to go home.

 

“I guess… this didn’t end up a big, fun night like you and I were expecting, huh?” I said remorsefully.

 

He looked at me, and looked towards the ground, nodding in agreement.

 

“I don’t know… the whole thing… it just… was real weird.” He replied.

 

“Yeah…” I agreed.

 

I looked up at the sky, just taking notice of the stars. There was a surprising amount of clarity in the sky tonight, considering the amount of smoke you figured you’d see.

 

 “There’s nothing to be weirded out about though… I won’t say anything” I said.

 

He looked at me.

 

“It’s not that I don’t believe you” Seth said.

 

“It’s just… awkward…” he said.

 

Though the silver illumination that the moon and the stars were emitting, I could see him shrug.

 

“I’ll live” he said.

 

He looked at me, and I nodded. But it was when he looked at me I got the sudden feeling that he wanted to ask me… he wanted to ask me why I had those diapers in my backpack. I could hear the gears turning in his head, and I could feel him wanting and craving to ask… but I highly, highly doubted he would.

 

I wasn’t going to push it – so I didn’t even think about trying to explain myself.

 

“I tell you what” I said, breaking the silence.

 

“I need some sleep. And you look like you do, too” I said.

 

“Yeah” he replied, looking at me intriguingly.

 

“One of us acts like we’re asleep, the other takes a picture… and then tomorrow, we’ll split our pictures. We both have computers, we can both upload the pictures to our computers” I explained.

 

“Why would we do that?” he asked.

 

“Neither of us wants pictures of ourselves on someone else’s computer. I’ll upload all pictures of just me, and you take pictures of all you” I said.

 

He was beginning to understand…

 

“I just want to sleep. I just want to be able to relax… I’m done playing around, you know?” I admitted.

 

“Yeah… yeah I know exactly what you mean… alright, that sounds good. I guess I’ll go back inside and let you take a picture of me sleeping” Seth replied.

 

“Alright” I said.

 

He didn’t hesitate to walk away from me and into the clubhouse… my guess was because he was so incredibly tired. I didn’t care… I was beginning to get happier now. The whole feel of the night FINALLY coming to its conclusion was being to excite me. I looked up at the stars above me one last time before entering into the clubhouse… they were so bright and vivid, it was almost unreal. Thousands of stars open for me to see… that’s a summer night for you.

 

Beautiful, open night skies, crisp air… I loved it. The sounds of the distant creek, and chirping crickets had filled my head once more, since they were all blocked out whenever I was in the clubhouse… I really actually didn’t want to leave that area… but I had to. I was tired, he was tired, and we both needed sleep and time to ourselves. I breathed in the air one last time as I was walking towards the clubhouse, and eventually, stepping inside.

 

---

 

The mid-night outdoor ambience came to a sudden stop once I stepped back into the clubhouse and shut the door. I tip-toed to not wake Brian or Daniel up, since walking on a wooden floor was pretty loud, dropped my bag onto the floor next to my bench. Seth was doing the same, as well.

 

He stretched, yawned, and laid back onto his bench, as I pulled the camera from my pocket.

 

“Alright, you ready?” I said.

 

Seth grinned and nodded… he was really, really exhausted. He shut his eyes, laid back, and stood still. I breathed in to not cause motion blur on the camera, and clicked the button.

 

There was a flash, and then a beep… and the auto-preview of the camera displayed what I had taken.

 

And more importantly, however… after that… after the preview picture faded… there came two more beeps, and a new screen that read “Memory Full”.

 

The day was done. It was over. I took a sigh of relief, and walked back onto my bench.

 

“I guess that’s that” Seth mumbled.

 

“Yeah… yeah it is” I said back.

 

I looked around… and looked for a spot to put the camera. I stood up, and looked at the middle of the room, where the candle was. I motioned over towards the candle, placed the camera near it, since it was pretty much in the middle of the room, it’d be hard for Brian to miss it. I breathed in… and blew the candle out, suddenly rendering everything black.

 

I was calm once again… for the most part… I wasn’t upset anymore. I crawled around in the darkness until I felt my backpack, and the bench. I climbed up onto it, and laid myself down, and began to relax… all too happy it was all over.

 

“Goodnight Aden” I heard Seth whisper through the darkness.

 

“Good night” I replied.

 

The whole day was flashing in my head after I knew Seth was asleep. I was all alone and finally had time to think. How awesome it was for me to hang out with my best friend’s on the 4th of July, the great pizza I had… the whole Seth-and-I episode. The dares that I endured… and the stranger dares I encountered later.

 

Those last dares… the ones with the baby’s things… those I didn’t understand. Brian really DID take it up further, like he said he would. But was it really because he saw and got the idea from a diaper commercial? Somehow I was skeptical… but I was more than willing to bet that was just my paranoia and suspicion. It comes with the whole package of being a diaper-lover or teen-baby. Things like that set in.

 

You become more anxious about little things that never made you think twice before. You become wary about everyone’s actions, and begin to relate them to infantilism actions… thinking “Are they one too?”

 

You wonder how many people are, in fact, diaper-lovers or teen-babies, or adult-babies too, and don’t know about it, themselves. You contemplate all kinds of randomly generated things that are conceived purely by suspicion, hope, anxiety, and your own uncertainty.

 

This was, of course… no exception for me, suspecting and hoping, that Brian was at least a diaper-lover. The whole thing with the baby stuff made me all the more anxious about his alignment as just a silly kid or, aware of it or not, a diaper-lover himself. Hell, maybe since he had those baby’s things… maybe HE was a teen-baby, as well.

 

Now I was just jumping the gun, of course. I was just jumping to conclusions, and I knew it. But man… it was so weird how he just busted out with a bib, a bottle… and of course, a pacifier.

 

I yawned… this was all becoming a bit too much for me to handle. I stretched as much as I could… curled up into a ball… and just tried to clear my mind…

 

I guess this was really, indeed, a pretty amazing… not just 4th of July, but a night I will definitely remember for the remainder of my lifetime…

 

 

“Chapter Seventeen, A Rude Awakening”

 

 

“Oh no!” I heard.

 

Because I wasn’t completely awake, I paid hardly any attention at all. I was just kind of in that midpoint between sleep and consciousness. I was listening, but wasn’t making sense of anything.

 

“Crap! Guys! Wake up!” I heard.

 

I didn’t wake up.

 

“W-Whaatt?” I heard in a long, haggard whine. It was Seth.

 

Aden, wake up man” I heard. It was Daniel, and he tugged me on the shoulder.

 

This woke me up a bit more. I slowly opened my eyes, and looked around… I felt so tired and felt like crap because of it. I definitely hadn’t gotten a very long sleep.

 

“What’s up?” I asked after a moment or two.

 

Looking over I could see Brian was already energetic. But he looked panicked.

 

“Guys, get your things!” he said. He sounded very worried.

 

“What’s up?” I asked.

 

No one replied. Brian was too busy tossing the pacifier, bottle, and other similar things into his backpack. Daniel was standing near me but wasn’t paying attention either, and was busy gathering his own things.

 

I looked over at Seth, who was lying on the bench opposite of me. His eyes were slits, and his head was resting against his backpack, using it as a pillow. He was falling back asleep. I wanted to do the same… but the apparent urgency in this situation was keeping me curious enough to stay awake.

 

“What’s going on guys?” I asked, a little louder.

 

Still no reply!

 

“Seth man wake up!” Brian yelled.

 

Seth’s eyes opened, and he picked his head up.

 

“I am awake man” he said.

 

“I’m serious stay up, we gotta roll. Get your crap if you brought anything” Brian insisted.

 

Seth’s eyes stayed closed, and he nodded his head.

 

A’ight yeah... I’m good” he replied.

 

“GUYS!” I yelled.

 

Everyone JUMPED!

 

“WHAT ADEN!?” Brian yelled back.

 

“What the hell is going on!?” I yelled in return.

 

“We slept too long, we have to get back to our house. Our parents could be awake right now, or could be waking up. We gotta get there before they realize we’re gone if they don’t know already” Daniel replied.

 

“W-What? What time is it?” I asked.

 

“Like 1” Daniel replied again.

 

“Thanks” I said back.

 

“Yeah… so get your stuff, we’re leaving like right now” Daniel said.

 

He was being very calm, cool, and collected. Brian, on the other hand, was not.

 

“Man mom and dad are gonna KILL us if they find out we snuck out!” Brian whined.

 

His things were gathered, and Brian and Daniel were ready to go. I was good to go, since my things were gathered – and Seth never even brought his bag. So we were set.

 

I stood up, as did Seth – and we both followed Brian and Daniel out of the club house (since they both already had left it and were walking hastily towards the path out of the woods).

 

Neither of us could see very well at all. The sun was as bright as a typical cloudless summer day could be. And to our unadjusted, tired eyes – it was probably the most agonizing thing we could’ve experienced at that point. We could hardly walk because of our sun blindness. We just had to look down at the ground and hope for the best!

 

Eventually we did make it though. We made it out of the woods, and through the streets. We cut through a few shortcuts here or there, and eventually made it into Brian’s backyard.

 

Reluctantly, we entered his house – because we all knew at that point that his parents were definitely awake and aware that we were gone.

 

---

 

“Excuse me!? Where WERE YOU FOUR?”

 

That was the first thing we heard when we entered the house.

 

“M-Mom!” Brian yelled.

 

“WHERE WERE YOU FOUR?” Brian’s and Daniel’s mother and father were both standing in the kitchen, and neither looked happy at all about our sudden reappearance.

 

Personally… I just wanted to sleep.

 

“W-We were at the store!” Brian replied.

 

“You were NOT! BOY DON’T LIE TO ME!” his mother yelled.

 

She was furious! It looked as though she was gonna slap Brian upside his head!

 

“W-We just went to the store before you were awake, and we were hanging out. That’s all!” Brian replied.

 

She stared at Brian – and his dad did too. They were staring at all of us. I was actually pretty nervous at this point… this seemed pretty serious. Brian had nothing to say. There wasn’t anything to say. If his mother or father knew the truth then this situation would get a whole lot uglier.

 

“Is this true, Daniel?” their dad asked.

 

“Yeah we just left a few hours ago” Daniel replied.

 

However, to all our dismay… this was not the end. This was actually just the beginning – because his father’s next reply was not what we wanted to hear.

 

“I’m disappointed in you both” he replied.

 

“Do you four think we were just born yesterday?!” Brian’s mom replied.

 

They couldn’t know about us sneaking out last night!” I thought.

 

My heart was racing! This was NOT good!

 

“Do you Brian? Daniel! We know you four snuck out last night – WHERE were you!?” Brian’s mom shouted.

 

“W-What!?” Brian replied.

 

“Where!?” Brian’s mom

 

“W-We didn’t do anything bad I swear!” Brian replied.

 

“We just went into the club house we built in the woods – that’s all” Daniel added. He was beginning to not sound as calm and collected as he was before.

 

Both of their parents just stared at them with blank expressions.

 

“You four snuck out in the middle of the night and slept in the woods? That’s ALL?” their dad said.

 

“But we –“

 

“Brian SHUSH!” Brian’s mom said, forcing her palm out towards him, and looking away – in that “Shut the hell up” way.

 

There was silence. There was a lot of uncomfortable tension in the air – and we were definitely in trouble.

 

“You, and YOU” Brian’s mom said, pointing at Seth and then me with her index finger.

 

“It’s time to get your things. You’re going home. Either call your parents, or I can drive you… or whatever – but you’re going home. And YOU and YOU…” she said, then pointing to Brian and Daniel…

 

“…are in so much trouble it’s not even funny. We will continue this conversation later” she said.

 

We just nodded at their mom. We didn’t dare say anything that could be stupid and get us into MORE trouble.

 

“O-Okay – I just have to run upstairs and get my bag” Seth said.

 

“Fine, go” Brian’s mom said.

 

We BOTH practically ran out of the room, and up into the brothers’ room.

 

“Holy shit” I said.

 

Yeahhh… this is crazy and not very cool” Seth replied, walking immediately over to the couch he was laying on last night.

 

I sighed, and rubbed my face. I was having an adrenaline rush… Brian and Daniel were really in trouble – and there was nothing we could do. And to be honest, I really didn’t want to be in the same car with Brian’s mom right now – and I really didn’t want to wait for my mom to pick me up.

 

I thought for a moment. It WAS possible to walk to my house. We were in the same town – it was just on the opposite side of town and was a decent walk – but nothing extreme.

 

YoSeth, lets just walk back” I said.

 

“Walk back where… to my house?” Seth asked as he slung his backpack over one shoulder.

 

“Yeah man. I don’t want to ditch Brian and Daniel and all but things are about to get real intense over here and to be honest I dunno if I trust their mom behind the wheel right now” I said.

 

I was exaggerating, of course. But he got the point, and shrugged.

 

Uhhh… we could, yeah… we roam the town in the middle of the night. No reason we couldn’t walk to our block in broad daylight” he said.

 

I nodded.

 

“Okay, let’s go then” I said.

 

Seth nodded in return, and we exited their room, and went back downstairs. Brian’s mother rose from her seat, keys in hand – ready to drive us home.

 

Seth was ahead of me, and put out his hand.

 

“Hey. We’re just going to walk back home…” Seth said.

 

She stopped, and looked at us.

 

“Huh? Why? Are you sure?” she replied, and we confirmed that we were definitely sure.

 

She shrugged in return.

 

“Fine, that’s okay” she said.

 

Behind her Brian and Daniel were looking at us, looking very sad. I honestly felt bad, but I wasn’t going to stick around longer than I had to. Seth and I left shortly after that, and began our walk back to our houses.

 

---

 

Maybe it was because of the situation that Seth and I just escaped from. Maybe it was my imagination completely. Or maybe it was real… but for some reason it was now very, very hot outside.

 

Seth and I walked off of Brian’s street, and walked in the direction we knew our block was. It would take a small bit of time, but we lived in a small town. If we had our bikes, it wouldn’t take more than a few minutes. Since we were walking, though, it would probably take a half-hour at our rate. And this sun was definitely making the time go slower.

 

“Man… Brian and Daniel sure won’t be hanging with us for a long time” Seth said.

 

I didn’t disagree.

 

“How long do you think they’ll be grounded for?” I asked.

 

“Probably for a very long time. I’ve never seen their mom act like that!” Seth explained.

 

I nodded.

 

“Me neither. But I’m not surprised that she would… if I had kids and they were sneaking out I’d be mad too” I said.

 

Seth agreed.

 

“Last night wasn’t that great anyway…” Seth said.

 

I knew why he would say that. It was partly true in the first place, but I knew that Seth was also saying that because of what he did on accident last night. I didn’t even think about bringing it up. I was hoping he would forget all about what I did to help him there… I didn’t want to think of a reason to explain myself about why I had a diaper in my bag.

 

“Yeah things were fun until we left. Things just… didn’t pick up after that” I said.

 

“I think it was the dares that did it. They’re just getting stupid now” Seth said.

 

Personally… I didn’t mind them. But I did have to agree… if I was like Seth, and NOT a TB or DL… I would think they were getting pretty stupid, too. The only reason why Seth did the dares in the first place was just to keep Brian amused, and to keep me from getting control of all the pictures that Brian took with his camera.

 

That reminded me! The camera!

 

As we were walking, I suddenly stopped, and felt my pocket. There it was! The camera was still in my pocket!

 

“What’s up?” Seth asked as we stood on a random corner of some intersection.

 

“The camera” I said.

 

His eyes widened.

 

Aden” he said.

 

“You have it right? You got it, right!?” he said.

 

He began to sound panicked, and even walked toward me.

 

“Yeah yeah, I just found it in my pocket” I said.

 

“Let’s stop at your house… we can transfer the pictures onto your computer, and then I’ll finish and put up mine on my computer when I get to my house” I explained.

 

Seth nodded.

 

A’ight yeah that sounds good” he explained.

 

We kept walking on.

 

“Anyway, what was I saying? Oh yeah – I dunno man these dares are stupid now. They were fun a few months ago but I think Brian just took these a bit too far. And now he’s in trouble for it. If I go home and my mom finds out that I was sneaking out, I’ll be dead! It’s not worth it to me” he said.

 

I thought about it… and he was pretty much right. I hadn’t even thought about if my mother found out about our little adventure all night. She would not be pleased, to say the least.

 

“Well… you’re not mad at Brian, right?” I said.

 

“Mad? No. But I think he should be acting a little smarter and stop with the silliness. Like I said they were cool a few months ago but they’ve gotten old, and the whole diaper-thing is getting stale real fast. It’s not necessary. It’s almost like he WANTS to wear them or something. Or watch us wearing them” he explained.

 

“I dunno about all that…” I said, in Brian’s defense. I was feeling a lot of negativity and tension here. Seth seemed mad about it.

 

“I don’t know what to think. I’m cool with him and yeah we’re friends. But I think he’s gotten a little too silly with this stuff. I’m not doing it anymore, man” Seth explained.

 

I just nodded.

 

“Well… you’re still… going to hang out with him, right? You’re not gonna just not be cool with him anymore right?” I asked. This was concerning me!

 

“Oh no. No, I’ll still be friends. Nothing has changed like that. I’m just done with this silly diaper stuff” Seth replied.

 

I took a sigh of relief… this is okay with me. The last thing I wanted was for Seth to stop hanging out with us, or to start hating any of us. I didn’t want that to happen at all with anyone.

 

We were a crew of friends, and often it felt like absolutely nothing could separate us. And that’s the way I wanted it to be.

 

---

 

Neither of us brought anything else from the night before. Seth never asked about the diaper in my bag, and neither of us ever brought up his wet diaper. We didn’t even talk about Brian or Daniel that much longer, and moved onto more general things. We talked all the way until we were at his house.

 

We stepped inside of his air-conditioned house, and immediately went up the stairs into his room. His room was still kind of messy but not as much as it was when I had found his brother’s pacifier.

 

We stepped over to the computer, and I pulled out the camera. Since I didn’t have the USB cable to transfer the pictures from the camera, we had to use Seth’s (he has a camera, himself so we used his cable).

 

He transferred any and all pictures involving him into his computer, and then gave the camera back.

 

I went home shortly after finishing up there, and did the same at my house on my computer. I don’t have a digital camera so I had to borrow Seth’s cable.

 

I jacked the cable into the computer, and connected the camera. In a short amount of time, after my computer had recognized the device, I browsed through the camera’s memory and browsed the pictures.

 

I simply smirked at the silliness of the pictures. As revolted as Seth seemed when we were walking back to my house, I personally was okay with it. But that was only because I am a TB. I couldn’t imagine what it’d be like for someone like Seth to deal with what we went through last night.

 

I just shrugged, and uploaded all of the pictures that were available. All of them included me in one way or another… and Brian, too. Sometimes even Seth was there. I thought these pictures were useless and stupid… but I wasn’t going to let Seth have them all. I trusted him a great deal but I wouldn’t dare give anyone that much blackmail material without a little bit of something to throw back. That’s common sense.

 

These were blackmail photos, pure and simple. And although I know Seth wouldn’t’ ever use them for blackmail; it never hurt to have a few pictures with him in diapers, too – which there were a few of. No one was innocent, so the playing field was even.

 

 

“Chapter Eighteen, Summer Outro

 

 

Summer days passed, one-by-one. The sun grew hotter and hotter, too – and there was sometimes a thunderstorm to even things out. But although the weather was the same like any other summer – things did change after we got in trouble for sneaking out.

 

Brian and Daniel were grounded for a very long time. Several weeks! And that wasn’t all, either. It was only a matter of time before Seth’s parents found out, and my mother. The day after we got caught, Brian’s parents called Seth’s parents, and then my mother and explained everything.

 

We were all grounded.

 

For the entire month of July we never hung out. I grew bored, but I quite often kept myself occupied with my diapers and computer. I don’t know about Seth, Brian, or Daniel.

 

---

 

“So how are things?” I read.

 

I was talking to my friend Luke online.

 

“Things are okay. I’m bored… it’s been so long since I’ve gone outside… I’m starting to go stir-crazy!” I admitted.

 

lol” he replied.

 

As I was talking to Luke, I was also looking on the forum that I visited often: ‘Teens Who Love Diapers’. It was the website that I was a regular on. The members there had grown to like me, and I thought I was pretty active and contributed positive things.

 

“So did you finish reading that on story?” Luke asked.

 

I was spending a good amount of my free time reading diaper stories lately. There were a lot of good ones, and a lot of bad ones. But I loved reading diaper stories… they were so cool.

 

“Nah not yet” I replied.

 

I was reading a certain story for the last day or two that were really large in size. The author was really dedicated.

 

“Getting close though. I’m pretty much at the end I think” I replied.

 

“Cool” Luke replied,

 

As I sat there, chatting away. Suddenly my phone started ringing.

 

“Hold up” I typed to Luke.

 

I sat up, and grabbed my phone.

 

“Hello?” I asked.

 

Aden!” I heard.

 

It was Brian.

 

“Brian! Whoa what’s up man?” I replied.

 

“I’m not grounded anymore. We’re allowed to hang again!” Brian replied.

 

“SWEET” I replied.

 

“Man I’ve been going crazy over here” I said.

 

“Me too! We gotta chill today man” I heard.

 

“Definitely, let’s do it” I said.

 

“Awesome. Okay look, I’ll hop on my bike. Can you call Seth and see if he wants to hang out, too? We can meet each other somewhere. Maybe the park or something” Brian said.

 

“Yeah sure, no problem. Sounds good” I said.

 

“Awesome. Call me and let me know what’s up” Brian replied.

 

“Definitely. I’ll call you in a minute” I said, before hanging up the phone.

 

I was suddenly so much more excited! It had been SO LONG since we could hang out. It seemed like forever! Immediately, I dialed the number to Seth’s house. The phone rang, before shortly after…

 

“Hello?” I heard.

 

It was Seth.

 

“Hey what’s up man, it’s Aden!” I said excitedly.

 

“Oh hey, what’s up?” he replied.

 

His voice didn’t seem as eager as I was expecting… but I didn’t pay any attention to it.

 

“Dude, guess what? Brian and Daniel aren’t grounded anymore!” I said.

 

“Let’s hang out!” I finished.

 

There was silence on the other end of the phone, surprisingly.

 

“Oh. Sweet… but I can’t man. Sorry. I’m going somewhere today” Seth said.

 

There was a certain level of apathy in his voice that I could easily detect. I was almost willing to say that he was lying.

 

“Oh… really?” I asked.

 

“Yeah. I can’t hang out today man. Sorry” he said.

 

“Alright… that’s fine… I’ll uh… talk to you later, then?” I asked.

 

“Yeah, sure thing” he replied.

 

That’s when we hung up the phone. It was a very brief, strange conversation. I didn’t know why Seth would lie… so I had to take his word for it. But it was pretty much obvious that he was lying.

 

I shrugged, and called Brian immediately.

 

“Hey, is Seth coming out?” Brian asked.

 

“Hey man. Nah… Seth can’t come out” I replied.

 

“Huh? Why not?” Brian asked.

 

“I don’t know. He said he was busy, but he said maybe tomorrow or something” I explained to Brian.

 

Seth had never said anything about tomorrow, but I was assuming.

 

“Oh. Okay… well, where will we meet at?” Brian asked.

 

“Let’s go to the park. That place is cool” I replied.

 

“Alright, I’ll see you in a bit!” Brian replied.

 

---

 

That day was spent like any other regular summer day between friends. We went to the park, talked, rode bikes, and had a great time doing it. But day did turn to night, and we all went home.

 

The same could be said about the next day, too. I called Seth, but Seth didn’t seem like he wanted to hang out. And instead, it would just be me, Brian, and Daniel.

 

The days then turned to weeks. We were two weeks into August, and we had all grown used to going outside by then. But the fact that Seth still hadn’t left his house was bothering all of us.

 

But it wasn’t until a certain day that things hit the fan, and something very unlike what I was used to experiencing, happened.

 

It was a day like any other. I was talking with Luke, and was in my room minding my business.

 

“Hmmm… I don’t know what I should write about” I typed.

 

“Well… it’ll be a diaper story, right?” Luke asked.

 

“Of course” I replied.

 

“Well then there’s nothing to ask. It’s about diapers!” he said.

 

I was brainstorming ideas for a story to write… I was bored, and had some free time – and I loved reading other diaper stories. I was finally getting used to the idea of writing my own!

 

Suddenly, though – the phone rang. It was about 1PM, so I knew it was Brian. I picked up.

 

“Hello?” I asked.

 

“DUDE” I heard. It was definitely Brian.

 

Yo” I said.

 

“DUDE. HAVE YOU TALKED TO SETH LATELY!?” I heard.

 

Brian sounded both furious and shocked!

 

“N-No, why? What’s up?” I asked.

 

None of us had heard from Seth in a long while. This was news!

 

“The kid just… I can’t even explain it. He just said he never wanted to talk to me again!” he said.

 

“What!?” I replied.

 

My heart stopped. What was this?

 

“Y-Yeah! I called him like ten minutes ago, and he told me not to call his house and that we’re done being friends!” Brian said.

 

“Why!?” I replied.

 

“I DON’T KNOW!” he replied.

 

“…was he serious!? You’re sure he was serious?” I asked.

 

“Dude I don’t’ even know. But he sounded like it and I’m like flipping out pissed because he said other crap too” Brian said.

 

“Like what?” I asked.

 

“Just stupid crap! Enough to piss me off! I’m seriously about to have Daniel go over there and kick his ass!” Brian said.

 

“Whoa whoa, wait” I said.

 

This was too much to take in… I didn’t get it! But the idea of Daniel going to Seth’s house to beat him up was a possibility if Seth had insulted Brian that bad. Daniel WAS his older brother, and I could easily see it being done.

 

“Look man, I’ll go to Seth’s house right now. Don’t send Daniel over – just calm down. Don’t do anything stupid. He was probably just playin’ or something. No need for this” I explained.

 

“No Aden I’m dead serious, he totally lost his damn mind. He said he was done with ALL of us and that he had better things to do now. And he said if I ever stepped foot anywhere near him he would kick MY ass” Brian said.

 

“No way” I replied.

 

“Yeah!” Brian replied.

 

Something here was not right… not right one bit. Nothing added up… but somehow, I got a flashback of the conversation we had had when we were walking back to my house, all those weeks ago before we got grounded. I felt like somehow his pent up anger or feelings about Brian might have gotten the best of him. Maybe he was just still mad that he got in trouble!

 

But either way, we were all friends and none of us EVER fought. Not verbally, and definitely not physically. This was serious, and it needed to be resolved. Now.

 

“No man… I don’t believe that… look, I’m going to Seth’s house. You chill, and I’ll call you and let you know what the deal is, alright?” I said.

 

There was silence.

 

“If you think you can do something about it, do it. But I’m telling you he’ll just say the same crap to you he just said to me over the phone” Brian said.

 

“Relax, I can handle it” I said.

 

Brian didn’t know about our conversation all those weeks ago. I knew that he was feeling weird about Brian… and I also knew he didn’t feel that way about me. There was absolutely no reason to be mad at me.

 

---

 

It was a very quick trip from my house to Seth’s. I road my bike over and didn’t even stop to get off my bike properly. Instead I simply hopped off the bike, and kept running all the way up to his front door.

 

I knocked, and knocked, and knocked – and didn’t stop knocking until someone answered the door (in other words, my hand never stopped knocking for a second, and just kept going continuously).

 

The door swung open, revealing Seth on the other side of the door. He looked mad, and aggravated… certainly not the way I was used to seeing him.

 

“What?” he asked.

 

I looked at him, shocked.

 

“What do you mean what? What the hell is going on man? I just got a phone call from Brian” I said.

 

“Yeah, I told him what needed to be said. I told him never to call me again, and that we weren’t friends. I told him like it was” he explained to me.

 

His voice was callous… he sounded like he couldn’t have cared less about anything that was going on.

 

“Why dude?” I asked.

 

“Don’t you worry about why” he said, practically talking down to me.

 

“Brian’s an annoying little ADD kid and I think he’s an ass. If it wasn’t for him I wouldn’t have just wasted half my summer being grounded” he explained.

 

“…that’s it? That’s what all of this is about? Because you got grounded?” I asked.

 

“No – not just that” he snapped, stepping out onto his porch.

 

He shut the screen door behind him, and his voice had an attitude.

 

“There are other reasons why I’m not going to hang out with him anymore” Seth said.

 

“Like what?” I asked.

 

“None of your business!” he immediately snapped back.

 

My mouth was hanging wide open. I couldn’t believe this!

 

“And what about me? Brian said you were done hanging out with ALL of us” I said.

 

Pft. I said nothing about you. That’s my point exactly – he lied. That proves my point: he’s annoying and now he’s a liar” Seth added.

 

“So what, you and I are still friends?” I asked.

 

He looked at me like I was an idiot.

 

“Well I…” he said.

 

Suddenly his eyes widened, and he backed away. His chin went up, and he took a breath in.

 

“…yeah Aden” he said.

 

“I have no problems with you. Just with Brian. I would say Daniel too but I know he’s going to defend his brother” Seth said.

 

I just stared at Seth, completely in disbelief. The way he had just said that we were still friends seemed so… incredibly insincere. I couldn’t tell if he meant it like that or not… and I certainly didn’t want to get caught up in this argument.

 

“Look man I don’t know what’s up with you. You can be mad at Brian all you want but you don’t need to say you’ll beat his ass” I said.

 

He shrugged.

 

“Oh come on Aden. Like Brian would ever give me the chance to. He’s got no backbone. He won’t show up here. I told him if he ever stepped foot on my property I would – because I WILL. He said he would come over here to see me himself. I don’t want to see him what-so-ever. I just want him the hell out of my life” he explained.

 

I shrugged.

 

“Still man why the hell take it that far?” I asked.

 

“Not only that – but he’s lying again. I didn’t say I wanted to kick his ass. I said I know that Daniel’s going to get pissed off, and if either of them come over I’m kicking Brian’s ass” he explained.

 

I didn’t want to hear it.

 

“This is ridiculous!” I said.

 

He just shrugged again.

 

“You’re buddy-buddy with him. Just tell him yourself. Look, I know you want to like… be the mediator here and all that fun stuff. But it’s done. I’m not saying another word to that little asshole” Seth finished.

 

I shrugged. I had nothing left to say… Seth was definitely sure of what he was saying, and there was nothing I could do to stop it.

 

I just stared at him and he gave me a narrow-eyed stare of assurance.

 

“Well… okay… I guess I’m going to go. Do you want to hang out sometime? Maybe tomorrow?” I asked.

 

I had to absorb everything… and I didn’t want to hang with anyone anymore. Most of all I was hoping this drama would be over. Somehow though… I felt like it was only the beginning.

 

“Yeah hit me up” Seth said.

 

I nodded, walked up to my bike, and road away from his house, toward my own.

 

---

 

I walked into my room, and immediately picked up the phone and dialed Brian’s number.

 

“Hello?” Brian asked.

 

He seemed to have calmed down by now.

 

“I talked to Seth” I said.

 

“Yeah and what’d he say?” Brian replied.

 

“Eh… it was just a bunch of crap. I don’t know what’s up with him man” I replied.

 

“I told you. The kid has lost his mind!” Brian said.

 

“I guess. I don’t know what’s up, but yeah he’s mad about something and I’m not sure what” I said.

 

“I don’t get it either” Brian replied.

 

“…but if this is how he wants to act about it, and not man up… then he can go to hell for all I care” Brian angrily stated.

 

“I’m sure all of this will blow over” I replied.

 

“No man – I don’t think it will. If this is how he wants to act then screw him. He owes me an apology” Brian then said.

 

I had nothing to say.

 

Our conversation didn’t really go much farther than that. Brian was as stiff as Seth was, and I had no idea which side to get on. Seth had suddenly begun hating Brian, but claims that Brian did things that made Seth hate him. Brian claims he did nothing and is innocent. I was completely shocked from the sudden tension on both sides.

 

We eventually concluded our conversation… I simply believed, though – that this fight would soon end and things would be good again. But time didn’t make that happen. The next day, nothing. The day after that… still nothing.

 

It eventually came to a week before school begun, and we were still no longer the group of friends we were only a month ago. Something major had changed… there was so much tension.

 

A feud had begun, and I was stuck in the middle of it, blind. I didn’t know what was going on, but each day passed and I had to listen to both sides complain about the other. All I wanted was for us to become friends, but it seemed that each day that passed actually only added to the tension of things.

 

Little did I know, however – as the final days of summer passed by, what was going to happen over the next few months. Fall was coming, and school was beginning.

 

This was going to become my first full year of school in a new school. I still didn’t know many people, and many people didn’t know me. I was nervous, and this time… it felt like I was going into school for the first time ever.

 

I was stuck between two fighting best friends, and was going into a school where I only knew those two friends. Things were about to get a whole lot more complicated… and I could feel it.

 

To me, it felt like a coming storm… where you didn’t know how bad it was going to be, but you knew it was on its way. Things were about to get a whole lot more tense.

 

School drama was about to weigh its heavy burden right into my life… and I didn’t believe that I was ready.

 

 

 

The story continues. Story III coming soon!

Story written by Baby Jake ([email protected])