A New Boy
78DB
Jon
Chapter 1
Sergeant Arthur Curley had his partner drop him off from work at the corner of Kerby and Mathews not far from Donahue's Market. As the squad car pulled away from the curb, the big-chested cop ran his hand through his curly red hair, loosened his tie, and eased his holster belt. Twirling his nightstick he strolled down the street on his way to pick up milk and eggs for the crepes his wife was planning for desert that night. He had been on the force 21 years, walking a beat in Southie for five, and then sixteen years as a patrolman. Despite Kate, who seemed to devote half her waking hours to the kitchen, the vigorous life he led kept him in excellent condition, with only a slight rounding at the corners. Scarcely noticeable, he thought, as he contemplated Kates cooking. He was well liked in the community, had raised 2 sons and a daughter; the last just graduated from Notre Dame with a degree in sociology. Officer Curley was feeling reflective as he strode down the street. It's been pretty good, he thought, with oldest boy John a doctor, starting practice in Cambridge, and by God his son Morgan a priest, with the parish down in Baltimore - that made his mother proud, and little Mary going on with a fellowship at Johns Hopkins for a PhD in child psychiatry.
His daughter was a special pleasure to
him. When she was born, he hadn't been at all sure what he was going to do with
a daughter, but she proved to be quite something: though just as good in the
kitchen as her mother, she hadn't let two older brothers keep her from the lime
light. Her determination was family legend. In order to follow the family
tradition established by her older brothers, she had integrated the previously
all-boy local little league. An event that had led Curley to fill in for a
departing angry coach. He had been a coach ever since, though each year he
would solemnly announce that this was his last. The big gentle man was widely
recognized as the best coach in the league, - not so much for his win-loss
record, which was very respectable - but for the way he could bring a boy
around. He seemed to have an amazing knack for seeing just what each little kid
needed to reach his full potential: a little bit of praise at just the time; a
stern hand when needed; a bit of a push in a new direction; when to ease up;
when to go hard - coach Curley seemed to have some inner sight when it came to
helping kids.
Curley and his wife had lived on a quiet
tree-lined street out in Brookline for 27 years in a grand big house bought in
run down shape and fixed-up as the kids grew. Married at 18, the kids had come
in prompt Catholic succession over the space of four years, ending with a full
cesarean and hysterectomy with the birth of little Bill. Last by an act of God,
he and his wife had particularly treasured the bright little boy, who always
seemed to have a smile for everyone. Small in growth due to medical problems
surrounding his birth, nonetheless he'd otherwise developed normally and been
entirely all-boy in behavior. They had carefully avoided letting any stigma
attach to his slow physical development, and his wife seemed to enjoy the
little extra bit of babying it had required to keep his bed dry. Footed
sleepers with snaps around the waist had been the standard bed wear for all his
short life, and a pat on his padded rump when bedtime arrived had been the
routine by which his father chased the seven year old to bed each evening. Any
comments by friends staying over night were dealt with matter-of-factly by a
father whose approval every boy on the block seemed to want. Somehow the
combination of little Bill's disposition and his parents good sense had
prevented any hazing by his friends for a problem that, even at age seven, was
not that uncommon among boys, though rarely as openly dealt with as little
Bill's.
Thus it had been uncommonly cruel, Curley
thought as he walked toward that market, that little Bill had gone so young. It
seemed impossible even 14 years latter. One moment he'd been rushing around and
in-and-out the house with a friend - and the next - there'd been a little
crumpled heap on the street by the driveway.
These maudlin thoughts were interrupted
as Curley passed the alley next to Donahue’s Market by an unmistakable scream
of pain from a young child. He quickly turned and looked down the alley to see
a small group of children surrounding two boys, one of whom was rolling on the
ground in obvious pain. Curley ran down the alley to see what had happened: as
he watched in disbelief, the standing boy leapt into the air and came down with
both feet on the other boy's outstretched arm. The limb, which was lying over
some broken bricks, gave an audible snap. As the boy on the ground shrieked in
agony, the other laughed, hauled back his foot, and was about to deliver a kick
to the boys crotch when Curley caught him from the back and jerked him off his
feet.
"Let
go you sonofabitch!" the boy yelled, twisting in Curley's grip and
kicking out at Curley's knees. He turned his head and sank his teeth into
Curley's arm. Blood oozed from between his teeth as he bit into the flesh.
Curley dropped the boy in shock, who hit the ground running, heading down the
alley - but not quite fast enough as Curley tossed his nightstick between the
boys legs, tumbling him to the pavement.
This time Curley put the grip on him,
slamming him chest first into the wall and snapping cuffs on him so fast that
it seemed a blur to the other kids. He then yanked the boy's feet out from
under him and spread-eagled him on the pavement. The stream of language coming
from the ground was impressive, not only for its quantity, vigor, and just
plain vile nature; but for the truly creative possibilities that were suggested
for what could be done with, and to, various parts of Sergeant Curley's
anatomy. Curley had dealt with enough human refuse over the years to be a
challenge to impress, but even he was amazed at what came out of the child's
mouth.
Ignoring the static, he turned to the
wide-eyed children and told a boy of about nine to run to the market and tell
Mr. Donahue to call for backup, and for an ambulance for the little lad
twisting in pain on the ground.
"Listen
kid!" he said to the handcuffed boy, "You so much as move and you will never forget it!"
Something about the deathly quiet in the cops voice made the boy go silent and
still. Curley looked at the other children and said, "If he so much as
moves a finger - you yell." As the children nodded, officer Curley moved
to the writhing boy on the ground, put his hands firmly on his shoulders and gently
held him still, all the while talking to him in a gentle reassuring voice.
Two days later Curley was at Juvenile
talking to Mark Struthers, the court probation officer. "You couldn't
believe it - a ten year old kid! - He just laughed when he broke that boy's arm.
It made me sick I tell ya. It made me sick. What's the world coming to"?
"From what I can see from Jonathan's
file," Struthers replied "the other kid's lucky he wasn't
killed." Jonathan is a most accomplished 10 year old: ten times up for
vandalism, five for assault - once on a teacher, and once for cutting up an
older kid with a knife who threatened him - he's been thrown out of school more
often than any other kid in Southie. His schoolyard protection racket has been
one of the most difficult to break in the history of South Boston elementary.
He's just about as vicious a ten year old as you could find anywhere on the
planet. The teachers won't let him on the playground: he's shaken down or
bullied every child in the school. There are children there who wake up at
night screaming his name. He doesn't love anyone or give a damn about another
human being - and I'm convinced he hates himself too. Frankly, about the best
thing society could do with him, is to take him out back of the courthouse and
put a bullet through his head. That boy will kill someone, and not that far in
the future. As far as I'm concerned he has same fine prospects in life as the
young Charlie Manson. A bullet in head would probably be the kindest thing we
could do for him too." Struthers mused. "You know, it's amazing. He's
a really cute looking kid. Looks like an angel - an angel from hell that
is". - he added wryly.
"Sweet mother of mercy, Mark, what
on earth makes a ten year old like that. Do you think he was born viscous, or
did someone make him that way?"
"In that poor little bastards case,
he was made. You wouldn't believe what he's been through. Even given what he's
done, it's hard not to have some sympathy for him. The boy was removed from his
mother two years ago. The neighbors complained about his tipping over the
garbage cans. They never bothered about anything else that went on next door,
and I guess the hospital didn't exactly do itself proud either. Fourteen trips
to the hospital between the ages of five and seven - all for contusions and
broken bones. Seems he was always falling down stairs. Afterwards, they even
found a nasty scar from a cigarette burn on the sole of one foot at the
children’s' center - must of been what made him so clumsy to fall down all
those stairs - I guess you have to really watch it in a ground floor apartment.
His father left at age 5, and it seems his mother somehow decided it was his
fault. She punished him by having him sit at the dinner table each night and
watch the rest of the family eat with an empty plate in front of him. Same at
breakfast. Had to sit at the table until everyone was finished, ask to be
excused, clear his plate - just like any other kid, except there was never any
food for him. Then she'd send him to bed. If it weren't for the school lunch
program, he'd died of malnutrition in a month. When she did feed him, it was
dog food in a bowl on the floor - and then she'd beat him till he vomited. It
seems that he wasn't vandalizing the neighbors garbage cans - he was trying to
get food. Weekends can be pretty long when you don't get to eat. The officer
that caught him in the neighbors garbage, had to fight to get a piece of rotten
chicken carcass out of his mouth."
"My God!" Curley gasped, how
could anyone treat a child like that."
"You got me," Struther's
replied, "up until his father left he was the apple of his parents eyes.
All the neighbors said he'd been a really nice child. But one day he's living
on Main Street - and the next in Hell. Point is though, there's so much hate
and horror in that boy now that it’s not likely he'll ever recover. The State's
tried only two foster homes in three years. They had to remove him after a week
in the first home to protect the other children - and they just tried a second
one last week. That was six days ago. In four day's he was setting up a
protection racket outside the new school. He broke that boy's arm because he
let another kid shake him down for his lunch money before he could give it to
Jonathan."
"You know," Curley said,
"what a kid like that needs is to start over. If we could just turn him
back to being a baby, give him some real parents, a lot of love, not expect too
much of him for a while, and let him grow up again - relearning what it is to
be a human being, what love is, what makes people care about each other, it
just might turn him back into being human again. You know that Kate and I had
that foster kid last year from you - nothing like this kid of course, but still
he wasn't any winner when he came. Strangely, if it hadn't been for his
bedwetting, I don't think we'd ever have succeeded so well with him."
"What do you mean?" Struthers
responded. "It was impressive the way you and Kate turned him around. It
was also impressive the way he was worked back into his mother's home. As far
as I know both he and his mother seem to be getting on fine, and he's doing
well in school. We all figured you had some kind of magic down here at the
court house."
"Well, you know ever since we lost
little Bill, Kate's had a place in her heart for little bedwetter's. Little
Bill's diapers were a special thing to Kate, somehow she liked them, she knew
the boy was her last, and I think she treasured having him remain a little bit
a baby as he grew up. That boy when he arrived at our house turned out to be a
totally self-contained nighttime irrigation system. In the morning the only
thing different between his bed and the Quabin Reservoir, was that the
reservoir couldn't of held that much. Somehow Kate coaxed that boy back into
diapers. That made her happy, she really loved it, and they became a special
thing - a time for lots of love, tickles, and cuddling just before bed, and a
little bit of nurturing in the morning. The kid seemed to not only like the
attention, but he also seemed to like the diapers for themselves. He'd often
get one of us to diaper him up before bedtime. Anyway, he throve on the special
attention. When he was in diapers he became a different boy. A new boy in fact.
Quiet, didn't talk back, wouldn't fight you all the time. He'd listen. I think
that somehow, when he let those diapers go on, he was saying 'OK, I'm just a
little kid, I don't have to pretend that I'm so tough, I'm vulnerable, and you
can hurt me real easy, so treat me like the little guy I am.'
You know, his bedwetting was the focus of his problems at
home. His mother had made him the little man of the house when his father died.
She confided in him, expected support from him, made him the responsible one
all the time. It was unfair of her, though it's very common in such situations.
It robbed him of his childhood. The bedwetting probably started as a result of
the extra stress on a boy who was being asked to be an adult, when he was just
a small child. It became the focus of his mother's frustrations, however, the
wet sheets, pajamas, smelly mattress - all the extra work, the embarrassment
and comments from neighbors. Every time he wet, she'd scream at him, tell him
to grow up, deride him in front of friends. He'd retaliate by misbehaving. At
school his grades crashed and he started getting into trouble. Once he was able
to let himself be a little child again, and got the extra love and nurturing he
needed to really tackle growing up, his grades and behavior improved rapidly.
When the caseworker became convinced his
mother was ready to take him back, it was decided that they would start off
gradually, first short visits, then overnights, and finally extended stays. She
came to our house the first few times. She was surprised by the diapers - even
their possibility had been a threat before Tommy came to us - and how they were
such a positive thing in Tommy's life at our house. When Tommy moved back, the
diapers stayed on at night. I guess they became a way for Tommy's mother to
acknowledge to him that he was still a little boy and that she was there to
take care of him, even if he did have to take a little more responsibility some
of the time since there was no dad in the house. Tommy even wears them during
the daytime on the weekends when he's feeling a little low, needs a little
extra reassurance, or just wants to play toddler."
"The problem is," Struthers
mused, "is that Jonathan doesn't have that problem. He's got almost every
other one in the book, but not that one. I'd think for starters, he'd have to
be incontinent, at least at night. He'd have to really need diapers; otherwise
it would be just another punishment. They'd have to be something he really
needed, even if they were a humiliation at first." He'd also need someone
like you and Kate, who'd look at the diapers as a positive thing, not an dirty
smelly chore."
"If you could make him incontinent,
Kate and I would be willing to make a go of the fostering end of the
business." Curley laughed. Kate would love to have another little
bedwetter around the house."
"You serious?" Struthers asked.
"I think that the only chance a kid like this has would be someone like
you guys. The whole idea seems wildly far-fetched, but Jonathan's already been
remanded to intensive psychiatric care - he's a ward of the court. If we could
convince the psychiatrist that this is a viable treatment - the court just
might go for it. Doc Tomlinsons a bit fruity you know, and he'd probably let
this go ahead just so he could study how it worked. I know as a fact that he
can't see any other alternatives for Jonathan. I wonder if it's possible for a
doctor to induce temporary incontinence in someone."
Thus, it was that a month later, Jonathan
Allen, age ten, found himself lying strapped on a hospital gurney in the
children's surgery at St. Marks Hospital. The disbelieving boy found himself
listening to a doctor explaining what was about to happen to him:
"Jonathan, society has decided that it will not and cannot put up with
your behavior. Not only are you a threat to society, but you are a threat to yourself.
Thus, the court has ordered a special treatment for you. It's affects are not
likely to last forever, it is likely that you will eventually grow out of them,
but for a period, you will find that in certain ways you are going to be a baby
again."
What the hell? Jonathan thought. What is
this asshole talking about. - Make me a baby again! "You gotta be kidding
Doc, you can't do that. What are you gonna do - take out part of my
brain." Jonathan suddenly went from angry to terrified.
"No." said the doctor, "Of
course not. After you go to sleep, we are going to inject a minute amount of a
special South American drug, curare, directly into the muscles controlling your
bladder. This drug attacks the nervous system, and the damage should substantially
weaken your control in situations of stress. Given that you are still growing,
the nerves around those muscles should regenerate with time, and thus the
effects of treatment should wear off by the time you are older, maybe 15 or 16.
"Huh?"
"What I mean Jonathan, is, that from
the time you wake up, for a few years, every time you get angry, up tight, mad,
or push others around, you will lose control of your bladder - just like a
little boy. You'll have a hard time attacking another boy if you wet your pants
every time you do it. Oh yes, it is quite likely that you will find it
difficult to keep your bed dry as a result too - but that's your problem.”
"What!"
It was the last thing Jonathan said as the first injection put him to sleep.
Life at the Juvenile detention facility
where Jonathan lived, and at the school he attended, became suddenly far worse
- if that were possible - than it had ever seemed before. Though Jonathan was
an intensely unhappy boy, his bullying other kids had been his one source of
self-esteem. It was the one place he was a winner. Having given up on love, he
had been willing to settle for respect - even if that was based solely on fear.
The facility was not designed as a warehouse for children, though it was
exactly that for a number of unplaceable children such as Jonathan. The
principle population, however, came to stay for a few months or a week during a
custody dispute, when a single parent became too ill to care for a child and
had no one to take him in, as a holding ground before placement in foster care,
temporary detention for delinquents, and the like. Thus, there was a constant
supply of new children that Jonathan had had to intimidate anew. Now however,
the first time he'd given a kid a shove - he'd wet his pants in front of a crowd.
Stunned he'd stood there while everyone laughed. Pants wetting became a several
time a day occurrence as the effects of the drug slowly manifested themselves,
and he soon wore a number of unhappy nicknames. Though the counselors regarded
the treatment that Jonathan had been given as definitely weird, they were not
at all upset to find that it rapidly ended his bullying the other kids. They'd
been thoroughly sick of this kid, and thought the comedown deserved. The
semi-permanent children at the center attended South Boston Elementary, and for
Jonathan life there was worse. Nighttime at the center was agony. He tried to
stay up, pinching himself to keep awake, sitting up in bed. He had just enough
control that if he didn't fall asleep, he could get to the bathroom by himself
every few hours and keep the bed dry. After three sleepless nights, exhausted
and miserable, he would invariably fall asleep each night- waking in a sodden
bed. He'd try to stay there until the counselors hustled the others in his dorm
out. Without exception, however, he was turned out in front of all the kids,
the state of his bed commented on, and a wastepaper basket placed under the
sheet to elevate it to dry over the plastic sheet while all the other beds in
the room were made up.
Unbeknownst to Jonathan, bedwetting among
his peers at the children’s detention center was quite common, which can be
expected for children from troubled homes, but those children were isolated
from those who were dry. They lived in a separate dormitory, or house as it was
called at the Center. There, with others of like habit, the problem was treated
with gentleness - the beds were taken care of, fresh linen was provided where
necessary, and those children for whom it was part of their routine wore diapers.
No one ever let out that there was anything special about one of the four
houses at the Juvenile Detention Center, and they had the support of living in
a group where bedwetting was a common problem. No one at the center would
normally expose a child to humiliation by his peers for a problem that was
hardly his fault. In this case, however, the idea was to give Jonathan the
incentive, and every desire possible to get out of the Juvenile home. Any way
he could.
There were three ways this was possible
for a boy in his situation. Adoption (which under the circumstances was about
as likely as the moon being eaten by a great cosmic fish with bells on its
tail), foster care, or running away.
On a Monday morning, three weeks after
the operation, Jonathan was called into the Director's office. On the way he
was taken by the bathroom and then immediately seated in his momentarily dry
shorts on a plain wooden chair in front of the desk. No one put Jonathan in an
upholstered chair anymore. Warden Jones looked at him with something
approaching sympathy, and asked how things were going. Jonathan's answer was
not very polite. The warden replied, "Then I suppose if we gave you
another chance at foster parents you might be willing to make more of an effort
to stay out of trouble than last time?" The response, which consisted of a
very improbable anatomical exercise that the warden could perform on himself,
was again less than proper. The director, however, had heard such things
before, and was able to resist pointing out that there were limitations to what
even a director could accomplish, and said instead "Then you'd like to
stay here?" And leaned forward and said in the intercom "Mr.
Brownell, Mr. Allen would like you to escort him back to House 3." This
brought a quick reconsideration of Jonathan's part, and after a short
negotiation a bargain was struck whereby Jonathan and the Center could say
goodbye to each other. It was not a tearful moment for either party.
The warden got up, and led Jonathan into
the next room where Officer Curley was seated. "Jonathan, I'd like to
introduce you to your new foster father: Sergeant Curley." Jonathan took
one look at the Officer who'd recently arrested him, and who still had a
bandage around his arm from where he'd sunk his teeth, and yelled murder. He
knew that this had to be one more dirty trick - that guy was going to beat him
blue sure as hell. The bastards! Jonathan also promptly wet his shorts. Their
baby blue color darkened in a warm stain that spread across his front. Worse, a
puddle formed at his feet as pee ran down through his underwear and shorts onto
the floor. He stopped yelling in sudden embarrassment. Immediately, the guard
standing by the door snickered "My goodness, look, the iddle widdle baby
wet his pantsies."
To Jonathan's surprise, Arthur Curley
gave the guard a withering look and said, "My foster son doesn't look like
a baby to me, and frankly I find your response to a problem which is no fault
of his own, but deliberately created for him, more than a little cruel."
Curley turned to Jonathan. "Come on, lets get out of here." Jonathan
only hesitated briefly, decided what-the-hell, even if he did get a beating, it
couldn't be worse than this place, and followed Curley. As far as he was
concerned, this was the first time in human memory anyone had stood up for him.
Arriving at Curley's patrol car parked
out in front of the building, he hesitated. Curley looked at him and said, bet
you've never gotten to sit in the front seat of one of these before. You know
you can open the doors up front from the inside. He opened the passenger side,
and taking a towel that he'd stashed under the seat for just this purpose,
folded it, placing it on top, and told the wet-shorted boy to hop in. Jonathan
was silent as they pulled out the front entrance and onto the ramp to the
expressway to Brookline. As they drove down the expressway, Curley pulled up
behind a prim middle age lady going five miles under the speed limit. He looked
over at Jonathan with a wicked smile. "Have you ever wanted to let off a
police siren?" It was a definite icebreaker, and provided a diversion from
the boy’s wet pants and the damp towel that had been the focus of his moody
attention. The wail of the siren was entirely satisfactory, and the sudden
sharp response of the lady as she pulled over as the powerful cruiser roared by
her and sped up the road was exciting. To his delight, he got to punch the
siren a number of times on the way home.
When they pulled up Spring Street to the
driveway in front of a big shingle house with blue trim, neatly mown lawn and a
broad rolling bed of daffodils in front, Jonathan leaned forward to look at his
new home - not that he had any intention of staying there for long. He was
already planning his exit. He figured that it wouldn't be hard for him to give
this guy the slip. Then he'd show them!
As the patrol car rolled to a stop in
front of a two-car garage, Kate came out to greet them. At 45 she was a bright
cheerful lady, given to tasteful quiet floral patterns on her cotton dresses.
She had a quirky fondness for big floppy hats and lawn parties, but was
otherwise a sober devotee of garden club, her kitchen, and any child that came
under her wing. She had a definitely romantic sense of the kitchen, and had
weaned her big Irishman away from his steak and potato diet to more exotic
fare: rich stews, Italian manicotti, pea soup with meaty chunks of ham, not to
mention the mind boggling pecan cookies that every kid in the neighborhood
would kill for - but usually didn't have to, since Kate kept them around to
keep them around. Jonathan looked at her with sudden trepidation. His
experiences with mothers had not been the best, and he didn't expect much of
any new one. His awareness of his wet shorts intensified, and a defiant flush
came over his face. He pushed the lock down on his side of the seat, and looked
at Arthur Curley.
Curley looked back and laughed. "A
little shy about those wet shorts? Kate's not going to find them extraordinary,
we've had lots of wet pants around this house. Our last foster kid wet his all
the time, bed too, and she always had dry ones around for him and a hug as
well. I don't think it’s going to be any different for you. If this weren't the
patrol car, I'd let you stay here until you decided to get out on your own, but
I'm not allowed to leave anyone unattended in it, and I'm getting out. You can
either get out like a man, or I can drag you out kicking and screaming. That
way your behavior will match your pants, and all the neighbors will know it.
Your choice. I might say that if you want to impress people that you’re really
not a baby, but a boy, then maybe you ought to learn how to act with dignity
and accept your situation as it is. From what I know, you're going to have to
get used to wet pants in front of strange people for quite a while- unless you
decide to do something about it - and now's as good a time to start as any.
Jonathan wasn't stupid - deeply angry at
the world - but not stupid. He reached over and unlocked the door, and stepped
out, taking his defiant look with him. The lady on the porch gave him a
cheerful, and fully appraising look (he couldn't help but blush because of his
shorts - the dark patch nearly covered their front, and was only highlighted by
narrow baby blue dry strips on the side). She smiled. "My! you didn't tell
me he was such a good looking boy Arthur. Come on in Jonathan - we'll find you
some dry pants. Is Jonathan what you like to be called? Come on! You know you
get your own room. It's upstairs, just down the hall from ours. I think you'll
like it. I also moved in a few of my son's old toys that I thought you might
like. After we get you fixed up, we can have some cookies in the kitchen.” She
stepped down, gently put her hand on his shoulder, and steered the rather
unsure boy up the front stairs into the house and up to his new room.
The front stairs of the house circled
around a large front hallway, and had a double landing leading to a broad
upstairs hallway running front to back of the house. This hallway doubled as a
large extra playroom when there were kids in the house. Double windows at the
far end looked over the street below, and the window seat below them provided a
great place for a walkytalky communication center, a command post for a
destroyer, or the edge of castle rampart: whatever a boy's imagination would
have it. Jonathan's room adjoined it, and was large, with bunk beds, a desk, a
toy chest and a whole wall of bookshelves packed with the stuff of boyish
dreams: from Stevenson’s Treasure Island,
to the Doyle's The White Company.
There was also a large bureau and an adjoining closet at the back of the room.
The windows looked down from a fair height onto a large backyard surrounded by
trees and hedges. Woods at the back provided an obvious route to adventure. All
this Jonathan would get to know in years to come, but for the moment he was too
overwhelmed by the rush of things to much notice, and it never occurred to him
to think of this place as home.
"Lets get you out of those wet
things," Kate said leading him into the room. "You skinny them off
and I'll get some dry ones out." She started rummaging in a bureau drawer.
Jonathan just stood there looking at her. "I got your size from the JDC,
and fortunately some of my nephew's old clothing will fit you- he lives over on
the other side of town - and grows like a weed." She looked at the boy
just standing there. "Oh come on now, I've seen lots of naked boys! Well
if you have to, you can go across the hall to the bathroom and wrap a towel
around yourself. You'll find a basket there just for your clothes. Jonathan
retreated to the bathroom. It was a bright sunny place with a large bathtub and
shower. A friendly room for long hot soaking baths on rainy nights, with
cheerful off-white walls and the high ceiling that goes with large old wooden
houses. There was a full-length mirror on one wall, and he looked in it at the
small boy in wet baby blue shorts standing in the center of the room. The boy
had medium length light brown hair brushed off to one side, deep chestnut eyes,
and a slightly upturned nose. The T-shirt was stretched over a chest that was
sturdy for a boy his age, even if he weren't overly tall. The smooth white legs
extending down from the shorts weren't at all knobbly or awkward. He skinnied
out of the shorts and jockey's, leaving them bunched on the floor, and pulled
off his T-shirt, which was now wet up the lower half. He looked at his naked
reflection. He had a definitely cute little rump, and the smooth crotch, small
testicles, and little penis appropriate to his age. He was completely a little
boy, even if the world hadn't treated him as such. He wondered, as he looked at
himself (he was still too young to have the overly critical bodily self
awareness of an adolescent) what it was about himself that was so different. He
knew other kids had mothers that didn't beat them. His mom had always given his
sisters dinner. What had he done? Why was he so different? It wasn't fair.
Kate called from his new room, "You
going to live in there Jonathan?” He grabbed a towel from the rack. It was a
big fluffy blue one, and he wrapped it around him like a robe. After the wet
shorts and T-shirt it felt good against his skin. He walked back into the
bedroom. Kate smiled up at him "Your clothes are on the bed, get them on
and we'll go to the kitchen for cookies." He looked at the clothes. There
was a pair of shorts, some white socks, and a striped T-shirt, as well as a
pair of unusually thick cotton underwear. Though they had a fly front, he could
see that they weren't normal. He looked at Kate suspiciously. "Those look
like training pants little kids wear." Kate looked back at him and said
gently "They are just like them Jonathan. Training pants are designed so
that you can use them like normal underwear, but they reduce the mess if you
have an accident. If you leak just a bit you can get back to your room for a
change without it being as noticeable because they are far more absorbent than
normal underwear, and if you really wet yourself they will hold a lot more
fluid and you won't spill on the floor as much. Which do you think is worse,
having wet pants in front of everyone, or wearing training pants underneath
that people can't see? It's up to you. I'll wait for you in the kitchen.” As
she passed, she gave him a gentle pat on his shoulder. Noting that he flinched
slightly at her touch she said, "It's alright Jonathan, I'll never hurt
you," and left the room.
As Jonathan came down the stairs, the
warm dry pants felt good. The new underwear felt a little strange, it was
thicker and he could feel it between his legs. He felt the front of his shorts.
Though he could feel the extra thickness beneath, the shorts didn't look
different from the outside despite his new underwear (he didn't want to say
training pants). Somehow, they felt a little reassuring and made him feel
subtly different as he entered the big warm kitchen and sat down at the kitchen
table where Mr. Curley and his wife were waiting for him.
"OK Jonathan," Curley greeted
him, "welcome you to your new home. We want you to know that we asked to
have you. No one made us take you, we wanted you. I could see that you were
worried when you saw it was me. I'm going to forget how we met, and we're
having a fresh start. No one is going to beat you up here, and I can guarantee that
you'll always have enough to eat. You can count on us to always deal with you
straight. We expect the same of you. You'll have a nice place to live, but you
will have to abide by the house rules. We want you to help out around the house
and in the yard: that means regular chores, dishes with Kate in the evenings,
yard work with me on the weekends. There are also some special rules to go with
your special problems. As long as you are unprotected, you will have to stay
off the living room furniture - it isn't designed for wet pants. All your wet
pants and clothing go in your clothes hamper upstairs. When you have wet
sheets, Kate will change them for you in the morning and help you with fresh
clothes when you wet your pants during the day. You will have to sit on a towel
in the car when we go places and when you sit in a chair at a restaurant or
movie theater. You will also have to help Kate with the extra laundry as long
as you have wet sheets. If you do your chores well and behave, you will get a
small allowance when we think that you have earned it. You can have friends
over whenever you like, but they must behave reasonably, and if we find that
they are likely to get you in trouble, then you will have to find new ones. You
can have friends sleep over - in fact, since you don't know anyone out here,
we've invited a kid we know rather well - Tommy, our last foster child who is
just your age, to spend a weekend with us. He doesn't live too far from here,
and you will be going to his school. Any questions?”
Jonathan didn't say much, not seeing any point. He didn't believe
much of this, and he really didn't plan to stay anyway.
Tuesday morning he woke to a musical
sound. Outside his window a bird was perched singing out its small soul to the
morning. He listen for a while to the quirky little melody, consciousness
slowly sinking into his sleepy little body. It took a moment for him to realize
where he was. "This isn't the JDC -that's for sure." As he lay there,
he gradually became aware of the wet sheet under him and his soaking PJ's. It
was wet and cold, the moisture having wicked through the cotton flannel up to
his arms and even partway around his back. Down in the center, it was damp but
warm, but on his sides and chest evaporation made it cold. Yuck! He hated lying
in the wet bed, but was too sleepy to get out of it at the same time. It was an
argument between different sections of his body. His sleepy head said
"Stay in bed.” his wet little bottom said "Hey! Get up, its
uncomfortable down here." He was just about to come to a decision in this
little debate, when he heard a cheerful voice come in the room: "Rise and
shine little sunshine - the new day is here. You've got a new school to start,
new friends to make, and work to do."
He whimpered slightly, rolled over to see
Mr. Curley standing by the bed looking down at him. "Go way, I don't want
to go to school."
"Of that my young friend you have no
choice. Time, tide, and school waits on no man or boy."
"It isn't fair, I hate it! You know
I'll have an accident and they'll all laugh at me. I won't go. You can't make
me."
"That's where you’re wrong. Not only
do I outweigh you by exactly 140 lbs, but I wrestle alligators for a living,
and spit in their eye when I'm done. Up and at-em! You want to get yourself up,
or do you want me to? The latter was said in Curley's quiet this-is-it neutral tone.
"Oh all right, but I want you to
leave while I get up."
"Jonathan, we all know your bed is
wet, and I'm here to help you clean up. And if you’re worried about my seeing
you in your wet PJ's or naked - I've seen boys in both conditions many
times."
Jonathan resigned himself to the
inevitable, and rolled out of the bed standing up in front of Mr. Curley.
"You're quite a little soaker,
aren't you?" he laughed. "Come on, skin the rabbit" and he
reached over and helped pull the wet pajama top up over his head. Then he stood
back and looked at Jonathan, waiting for him to take off the bottoms. Jonathan
hesitated, and finally turned away pushing his bottoms slowly down, exposing
his wet little behind to Mr. Curley's view. Curley went round the naked boy and
pulled the sheets off the bed, then picked up the wet pajamas from floor.
"Come on - off to the bathroom, its time for you to wash up and brush your
teeth.” Marching Jonathan out of the room to the bath, where he opened the top
of the large plastic cloths hamper and dumped sheets and pajamas in. "Your
foster mother will pick up whatever's here every day and put it in the wash.
You'll have to help twice a week folding it and putting it away. He directed
the boy to the sink and indicated a brand new toothbrush hanging next to it.
"You brush your teeth every night and every morning around here. It beats
the dentist drill. I'm going to supervise that activity, until I'm sure you
won't forget.” After the teeth were brushed, he then directed the boy into the
shower. Jonathan started out after a quick rinse, but was directed back in, and
a bar of soap was run through his hair and down his back by a whistling Mr.
Curley, who then directed him to wash his genitals and behind thoroughly. Five
minutes later a well-scrubbed boy walked across the hall into his bedroom to
find Mrs. Curley laying out school clothes on his bed. The boy blushed a bright
red when Mrs. Curley looked up to see his naked figure, but she just smiled and
said, "Hurry up - your foster father will be downstairs eating breakfast
before you get there. It's specially good, with fried ham and sweet rolls and
you'll want to get there before it's all gone." She made no motion to
leave, and stood there while the naked boy hurriedly pulled on the pair of the
thick white training pants she'd laid out, a pair of faded Levis and a bright
kelly green and blue-striped shirt. A careful eye would notice the outline of
the extra thick underwear beneath the tight Levis, Kate noted, and smiled to
herself. She regarded his apparent acceptance of this little item as an
important first step in the overall plan for Jonathan.
After breakfast, Jonathan was sent off to
the bathroom and then Mr. Curley took him in the patrol car to school.
Curley escorted him into the
administration office and asked for the vice-principal. "Hello Joseph,
this is the boy I told you about."
"Wellll! So this is the kid. Doesn't
look all that mean to me. You say that we should watch out since he's likely to
wet his pants at the drop of a pin!"
"The truth of the latter statement
was demonstrated on the spot, as Jonathan lost control in his embarrassment.”
He could see the secretaries looking over at him and smiling. Mr. Curley just
laughed, “And that's what this bag of extra clothing is for. You can send it
home with him when its full of wet stuff, and we'll drop off fresh clothes
twice a week. I'll leave him to you; I've got to get to work. Behave yourself
Jonathan, and mind the teachers.”
After Curley left, Joseph Miller took
Jonathan down the hall to class, stopping off at the nurse’s office on the way.
The humiliated boy had to strip off his pants and underwear in front of the
nurse and Mr. Miller, and then pull on a new pair of the extra thick underwear
and jeans. Nurse Jackoby held up a pair of the underwear and commented on their
unusual design for a ten year old, and Mr. Miller took them and looked them
over as well. “Trainers!” He smiled at Jonathan and said that he knew a few
boys in the first and second grades that could use a pair of these.
As they continued on down the hall from
the nurse's office, Mr. Miller said "Looking over your record, Jonathan,
we've decided to put you into 4th grade with the 9 year olds. You're just too
far back to continue on with your own age group. Besides you may fit in there
better anyway."
Jonathan was quite startled at this
development. He had never considered the possibility of being held back -
coming from a school in a poor district where the kids were routinely
passed-along. This seemed a deathblow to what little self-esteem the boy had.
Small tears of dismay welled up in the corners of his eyes: "P'please Mr.
Miller, I know I can do fifth grade - please don't put me back. I was in fifth
grade in Southie, why can't I be here. I want to stay with kids my own
age."
"I'm sorry Jonathan, but it just
won't work, your grades at South Boston Elementary were mostly failing. In
addition your behavior hasn't been that of a fifth grader, particularly not
when you wet your pants all the time. I think that it will be less disruption
with somewhat younger kids. Besides," he smiled, “more of the younger kids
share your problem - at least at night among the nine year olds. More important,
however, is that you are just plain behind. Fact is, academically you may
really belong in third grade. You'll have your work cut out for you just to
stay in fourth - and there are no promises of that either. You will have to
show us that you belong there if we are to keep you there.”
Third grade! Oh God! Please no! He
thought.
Jonathan was fortunate that he had
emptied his bladder a short time ago as he was escorted into a large room
filled with children who stared and whispered at the now terrified boy. He
stood there at the front, while Mr. Miller introduced him to Miss Hanlin and
left. Miss Hanlin had been already well briefed on Jonathan, but she felt for
the little guy and was willing to let him have a fresh start - until he proved
otherwise. She knew the bad he'd done, but also the bad that had happened to
him - and the special course of treatment had been explained. She decided that
now was the time for a small grace. He'd have time for all the children to get
to know his problem later, she wasn't going to see him humiliated at the start,
so she smiled down at him and asked wouldn't he like a desk at the back of the
room where he could observe the other children and get used to the routine.
Jonathan looked at her gratefully,
realizing that this was a great break: the other children couldn't see if he
had an accident and he would be out of sight from all the staring eyes in the
back. Slipping into the seat in front of the small school desk, he was relieved
to see that the metal basket under the top was low enough to cover his lap from
view. He put the armload of books brought to him by the teacher in it and sat
there as each child stood and introduced himself.
By lunchtime he had settled down a bit,
though the children giggled at the frequency with which he raised his hand to
go to the bathroom. Nonetheless, there was only a small damp patch at the front
of his trousers by the time the rest of the children rocketed through the door
at lunchtime. Miss Hanlin looked at the little boy huddled at his seat in the
back corner of the room across the rows of empty desks. "Jonathan, now
that the other children are gone, I can take you down to the nurse for a change
if you want."
"Don't need it!" the boy said
loudly, and he bolted from the room.
Jonathan arrived in the lunchroom as most
of the other children were getting up from the tables and heading out the door
to recess. He grabbed a tray and slid down the cafeteria line, taking only a
carton of chocolate milk and a tuna sandwich, and retreated to the nearest
empty table. As he sat there picking at the sandwich, he could see a group of
boys about his own age talking to each other and looking at him. The group was
dominated by a red haired boy a little bigger than the rest to whom the others
all deferred. He recognized, with animal instinct, what would have formerly
been his natural rival on the playground. Now, however, he did not sense
competition, but rather a threat. He hung back at the table, nibbling slowly on
his sandwich, waiting for the others to leave. But they seemed to have all the
time in the world. Finally, the lady at the lunch counter told them all to
clear out. When no one moved, she started with Jonathan, who was reluctantly
forced to head towards the door. Instantly, the others rose and followed him.
Jonathan was all too aware of what was likely to happen next, and knew that
finding an area with a lot of people was his best protection. He was worried
because he had counted on spending recess near the bathroom, hanging around the
halls. But that was clearly out. Heading out onto the schoolyard, he was
dismayed not to see a teacher in sight. As he hesitated on the edge of the
playground felt a hand give him a shove from behind.
"Hey!
I was speaking to you kid!"
He ignored the shove, looking desperately
for a teacher, but all he could see were other kids turning to look - sensing
an impending fight. One of the kids stepped in front of him, boxing him in.
"When
Joe talks to you kid, you pay attention. See!" and shoved him
backward where he tripped over another boys outstretched leg and fell hard on
the gravel. His arm stung as the grit dug into it, and he rolled over clutching
the skinned flesh.
"He
pissed his pants! Hey everyone come and look at this guy - he's pissing his
pants!"
He could hear laughter and jeers all
around him, and looked up to see the red haired boy leering down at him.
"What's your name piss-pants? I can
see that you and me are going to be gooood friends. Yes indeed. Why don't you
stand up and show evvveeeerrry one your little baby pants. Does mommas little
baby need a change?"
The laughter increased. Jonathan was
terrified. He could see the group of boys moving in on him, and he knew that he
was going to take a beating.
"Around here we have a rule, little
piss pants, you do what Joe Kelly tells you - and I asked you your name!
"J-j-jonathan." he stuttered.
Well piss-pants Jonathan, first we're
going to show you what happens to little pant wetters who don't do what Joe
Kelly tells them, and then you're going to agree to give me a buck every day -
just cause you like me."
That meant that Jonathan would have to do
without lunch if he were to pay. His pants were already wet. To hell with it he
thought, and stood up. "I'll fucking give you this you little fucking
bastard” Jonathan drove his knee into the startled boy's crotch. Hard. Joe
gasped and fell to the ground. “Any of the rest of you little fuckers want to
join him?” The rest of the boys backed off. Jonathan turned back to Joe who was
staggering up off the ground, and kicked him in the face. The rest of the kids
gasped - this boy wasn't behaving the way a sissy pants wetter should.
"What's going on here?" Mr.
Miller strode into the group. Children started to drift off in various
directions. He looked at Jonathan, who was standing there, pants sopping wet,
tears of anger running down his face, and then down at the boy lying on the
ground. "Well, well,” he thought to himself, “this is a little ironic. Joe
Kelly meet Jonathan Allen. What an interesting turn of events - one little
problem might just solve another.”
“Nothing!” Jonathan said through clenched
teeth. He'd decided that it would be a bad thing in his present situation to
cross Mr. Miller And for Jonathan the lack of profanity under the circumstances
was exceptional.
“The little brat pissed his pants.” Joe
Kelly said staggering up off the ground - trying to recover some of his lost
face.
“Well then, everybody can see that the
great Joe Kelly has been licked by a pants wetter.” Replied Mr. Miller.
"Maybe its time you thought twice before you picked on the little kids
around here."
A boy sniggered in the back and Joe
turned and glared at him.
"Come on Jonathan, let’s go in and
get you changed."
While Joe Kelly was an enemy for life,
and would take any occasion to get even, those opportunities were strictly
limited by the fact that he, and none of his group, was particularly eager to
again put themselves within too close a range of Jonathan Allen. This had the
salutary effect of diminishing somewhat his stature on the playground, and
therefore his ability to terrorize and blackmail the other children. It put
Jonathan in an odd position. Though clearly not in a position to dominate
others due to his wetting, there was a clear, if hidden, respect for his
obvious ability to take care of himself.
The rest of the day was no more fun than
what had passed. In gym class he had to undress in front of the other kids, and
he heard some giggles and comments about his underwear, which, though the
differences were not all that great from normal boy's jockeys, were clearly
unique for his age. That was followed by his drenching his gym shorts during
the middle of the soccer game, and being sent down to shower early and get over
to the nurse. By the end of the day he had exhausted his changes of clothing,
and was led by the hand by a teacher, with damp pants and sack of wet clothing,
to the correct school bus to be driven home. His condition was noted by all on
the bus, and much commented on all the way to his stop.
Dropped at the driveway of the Curley's
house, the tired boy was met by Mrs. Curley. "Doesn't look like you had
too good a day!" She exclaimed.
"No." He said miserably.
"Well, I guess we shouldn't expect
much on the first day. Lets get you changed, and then you can sit with me in
the kitchen and tell me all about it." She put her arm on his shoulder and
gave him a quick little hug, and then led him up to his room.
In the kitchen she put a plate of pecan
sandies and a glass of milk in front of the now dry, but silent boy. "I
heard you beat up a boy named Joe Kelley today. You want to tell me about
it."
He looked at her sullenly. "Its none
of your business."
"Jonathan you are my business, and
so is everything that you do and happens to you as long as you live in this house."
"I don't want it to be."
"Well that's the way it is. Mr.
Miller said that the kid you beat up was the biggest bully on the playground,
and that a number of parents have been complaining that he was stealing their
kids’ lunch money. Is that true."
"I guess so."
"Did he try to take your lunch money
Jonathan?"
"He wanted me to pay a dollar a day,
and I wasn't going to give it to him. You can punish me all you like but I'm
not going to be sorry for kicking him."
"Jonathan, did you hit or push him
first?"
"It wouldn't matter if I did."
"Did you?"
“No,” he said in a still sullen voice,
“him and his friends tripped me and pushed me onto the ground. They said they
were going to beat me up first and then I would have to pay them every day if I
didn't want it to happen again.” He looked at her, his challenging eyes glaring
defiance.
"Then you did the right thing. Good
for you! Arthur will be proud of you."
"I did?"
"Of course you did!" she
exclaimed. "Every boy has the right to defend himself by whatever means
are necessary and reasonable. I wouldn't expect you to even fight fair in a
situation like that. In fact, I hope you wouldn't. The situation didn't call
for it. I just hope that you didn't hurt the boy any more than necessary."
"Oh." Jonathan said. He was
dumfounded by this rather straightforward praise for an action for which he'd
expected to be punished.
"Jonathan, there's a difference
between self defense and bullying someone, and just because the Court has
decided that the rest of the kids have to be protected from you doesn't mean
that you aren’t expected to defend yourself. In fact, Mr. Miller was quite
pleased to have Joe Kelly taken down a peg. You work on your studies a bit, and
show him that you can be more than just a thug, and you just might make a
friend there."
Wednesday morning the bed was wet again,
and Thursday, as well. A sack of clothes came home with him each day. The
wetting was worse than even the Curley's had expected, and each day he arrived
home as wet as the day before. Each day he was greeted gently by Mrs. Curley,
and each morning a cheerful Mr. Curley got him up.
Friday afternoon he ran up the driveway
past Mrs. Curley from the bus, slammed the door of the house, ran to his room
and slammed the door again. When Kate came upstairs, he swore and screamed at
her from his bed. She went back downstairs and waited an hour. She returned to
find the boy lying on his bed asleep exhausted, face stained with tears. She
spread a comforter over him and went downstairs and called Mr. Miller. The
school had decided to put Jonathan back to third grade.
"He simply isn't prepared for
4th," Mr. Miller had said. "Moreover he just sits at the back of the
room and sulks."
"I don't think that it's a good
idea, even if he can't do the work right now," Kate replied. After some
discussion, she got Mr. Miller to agree to hold off for a week and that they
would meet for a conference about Jonathan to review his progress after that.
When Curley appeared home, he asked where
Jonathan was. "Up in his room asleep an hour ago when I last checked. He
had a terrible day at school and came home in a terrible tantrum. They told him
they were going to put him in third grade with the eight year olds."
"I think our young man is getting a
bit too much thrown at him." Curley replied.
"I know, I called Mr. Miller and got
him to agree to hold off for a bit, and arrange for a meeting on Monday after
school. Can you make it?"
"I'll make it!" he said heading
up the stairs.
He returned hurriedly. "The boys not
there!" A quick search of the house revealed only an open window and a
snapped branch on the tree in front of Jonathan's window where the boy had
slung himself down to the ground. "I hope he didn't hurt himself,"
Kate said, looking at the ten-foot drop to the ground from the broken end of
the branch.
Curley headed down to his car, just as it
began to rain.
Jonathan looked out from the station
wagon’s window as it drove down the street to see the rain pelting the windows.
"Thanks for the lift mister!"
"You're welcome kid. Going anyplace
in particular?"
"Nah." Jonathan replied without
thinking, "Anywhere you're going."
"That sounds fine to me."
Jonathan didn't notice the heavy tone in
the man's voice.
"You got a family kid?"
"Nah! I used to live at the JDC, but
now I live by myself."
"Really? Now that's something. How
would you like to earn a little bit of cash?"
"Sure," said Jonathan,
wondering what the man wanted him to do. In answer the man drove a bit further,
then pulled over on a side street and off onto a short wooded road out of view.
"Hop in the back kid, and I'll join
you as soon as I put the seats down."
"What for?" Jonathan queried,
puzzled.
"You know what for." the man
said laughing heavily.
"Uh - OK." Not having the
slightest idea what the man was talking, about he climbed into the back, while
the man reached over and put the seats down flat. The man got out and did
something outside that Jonathan couldn't quite see in the dark and rain, but
when he climbed in he was completely naked.
"Common kid lets get those pants
off."
"Hey what are you doing? No, leave
me alone mister."
"Aw quite playing games, you know
you want what I have. The man reached over and grabbed Jonathan by the belt,
unbuckling the struggling boys pants, he started to yank them and his underwear
down his legs. Jonathan immediately lost control, and sprayed the man right in
the face.
"You filthy son of a bitch the man
screamed and kicked Jonathan in the chest. "Get the fuck out of my car you
little queer!" Unbeknownst to Jonathan, he'd done about the only thing
possible to save himself from a twice-convicted child molester. He scrambled
with the door handle that fortunately yielded, and shot out the door as it
swung open into the woods.
"You little fucker! You pissed all
over my upholstery." He heard a tearing sound and saw the man throw
something into the brush. The car door slammed and he heard the car roar off
down the road.
Coming out from behind the brush where he
hidden, the half naked boy spotted his pants lying on the ground in the rapidly
fading light. His relief was short lived; they'd been ripped in half, split
seam to seam down the middle of each leg and up the back. His shredded
underwear were lying in the mud near where the pants had been. He looked at them,
wondering what he was going to do. His chest hurt. The rain was pelting him and
the T-shirt he wore was scant protection against the rain. He held up his pants
and spread the cloth open. After some experimentation, he tied them around his
waist in sort of a short skirt, tucking the spare leg in at the waist, and
crept back up the road.
After slogging down strange streets and
roads for 4 hours, ducking behind the shrubbery each time a car came by out of
the dark pouring rain, he was thoroughly chilled, hungry, and too scared to
think. He was terrified the man would come back and find him. When a car came
up from behind him and slowed, headlights blinding him, he turned and ran
headlong into a yard, through a maze of wet brush, which scratched and tore at
him, over a fence, into a yard. From nowhere, a dog came out, snarling and
barking, teeth bared, pulling at its chain. Terrified he ran around the corner
of the house, and before he could realize it, straight into the chest of a big
dark figure in the rain. The man grabbed him pulling him to his chest. He
screamed and screamed, kicking and tearing - but the man just kept holding on.
"Jonathan. Jonathan. Jonathan."
A voice kept repeating, "Its me Jonathan." The boy looked up to see
Arthur Curley holding him. He collapsed, chest heaving, gasping drawn out
rasping breaths. Arthur Curley heaved the half naked boy up into his arms and
carried him out through the yard to the patrol car.
"Its alright folks, I'm a police
officer." he said to the people coming out of the house. "Just a lost
boy, and we'll take him home now." Curley placed Jonathan on the front
seat of the car and pulled a blanket over him.
"I, I did-didn't rip my pants."
Jonathan looked up at him "Ssss-some man did. H-he, he tried to take my
cl-clothes off." Another squad car pulled up. Curley leaned over gave the
shaking boy a quick hug and said "Its all right Jonathan. I know. Its OK.
Now I'll be right back, you stay here, and we'll go home in a minute."
"Find the kid Curley?" Sergeant
Blake and his partner asked, getting out of the patrol car.
"Yah. But a little late I think,
some guy tried to molest him. I'm going to get him to the house, and I'll phone
in what I can get after we get him calmed down."
Kate could see Curley coming up the walk
to the house carrying Jonathan in his arms. The boy was clinging to him, and it
took some seconds for them to gently extract his arms from around Arthur's neck
and sit him on the couch. She ran upstairs and got him dry clothing. He made no
motion of resistance as she dressed him. And when she was done he clung to her,
burying his head in her blouse and sobbed.
"I'm sorry - I'm sorry - please, I'm
sorry. I don't want to wet anymore. Please make it stop - I'm sorry I don't
want to have to stay with the little kids. Please don't make me. Please. I want
it all to stop. Please ---." He sobbed and sobbed. Kate just held him,
rocking him back and forth gently in her arms, patting him on the back.
"It's OK Jonathan we love you. Its
OK." she repeated the gentle message over and over until he fell asleep in
her arms. They carried the boy up to his bed and tucked him in pulling the
covers up around his chin. In the night he woke up screaming, and Kate went in
and Jonathan let her hold him and rock him back to sleep.
Chapter 2
Jonathan woke up in his usual wet bed. He
could see from the sun streaming in the window that it was late, 10 or 11 AM.
He lay there for a moment, the events of the night before slowly coming back to
him. In the light of day they seemed further away, but still terrible. It had
been a mistake to run away he realized. It was a bigger and more terrible world
out there than even he had thought. Here he felt protected. He didn't
understand quite what had changed, but he knew that he wanted to stay with the
Curley's. It was the first time that he'd ever felt that way about anyplace or
anyone since just after his fifth birthday when his world had collapsed. He
didn't remember his mother much, he was aware that she'd gone to jail for a
while, but she had never tried to contact him when they released her, and he
had subconsciously suppressed her memories. He often wondered where his father
was, but sensed that he was not going to return, and felt a deep sense of
abandonment. Till now he'd never felt like he belonged anywhere or to anyone -
just to himself. He wondered if they'd let him stay at the Curley's. He wished
that Mr. Curley had been his father, and that his mother had been like Mrs.
Curley.
He rolled out of bed and put his feet on
the floor, sitting up on the edge of the bed. Looking at his feet, he suddenly
realized that he had on a footed sleeper. He hadn't worn one of those since
he'd been seven, but he knew that a few kids his age still wore them during the
winter in Boston, since they kept you really warm if your family didn't have
much heat in the house. He guessed that Mrs. Curley had put it on him to keep
him extra warm after the drenching he'd had last night. He heard a noise and
looked up to see the Curley's standing in the doorway. They'd been listening
for any sounds of life upstairs in the kitchen all morning.
"Well big fella, how you feeling
this morning? You had a pretty tough night last night, so we decided to let you
sleep in," Curley said looking at the small boy sitting in the wet sleeper.
He really looks pretty cute in that sleeper, he thought to himself, and looking
at him, saw, for a moment little Billy, sitting there. This impression was
heightened by the fact that for the first time Jonathan had visibly brightened
on the appearance of his foster
parents.
His wife stepped around him and went over to the boy and gave him a hug:
"I was so worried about you last night," and she kissed him. Jonathan
didn't even flinch, instead he hugged her back.
"C-could I stay here?"
The boy looked up at Kate with his
chestnut eyes pleading, and then at Curley.
"As long as you like," she
replied smiling.
"W-why?"
Curley realized that that was not at all
a strange question for Jonathan. For most children it was never asked because
parents were just a fact of life. For Jonathan, that anyone would actually want
him was an entirely foreign concept.
"There are a lot of reasons
Jonathan. Partly it’s because of little Billy - he was our fourth child. Like
you he was a bedwetter, and he was our last, and therefore special. He was
killed by a car when he was seven, and he left a big hole in our lives. To tell
you the truth, that's why we don't mind your wetting at all. Because of little
Bill, we have a special place in our hearts for little bedwetters. Our last
foster kid is quite a wetter too. He lives with his mother now, but you'll get
to meet him next weekend. We think you'll like him too, not just because you
share a common problem, but because like you, he's really basically a neat kid.
When parents loose a child they know that he can never be replaced, but it
leaves them permanently with the feeling that however many children they've
had, it wasn't enough. It also teaches them that each person in this world is
very special and very precious. And we think that about you too. A bit
difficult right now, perhaps, but well worth all the time and care we can give
you. Another reason why you can stay here is that you deserve a break. You've
had a lot of terrible things happen to you that shouldn't happen to any child.
That's not an excuse for you to misbehave in the future, but it’s a good reason
for us to give you a chance. But most importantly, Jonathan, people need each
other. They need to have someone they can count on for help and love when they
need it. That's why I was out for four hours last night looking for you. That
goes both ways, we think we need you, and we hope you feel the same way about
us. We don't expect you to be the best kid in the world overnight. You have a
few problems, in school, with your peers, with behavior in general - but if you
like you can stay here with us and learn about all these things and have a
home."
"Enough lecture, Curley," its
time we got Jonathan out of those wet things." She reached up beneath his
chin and pulled the zipper down his front, exposing his little wet body to the
cold air. This made the boy look down and he realized that he was wearing two
pairs of training pants under the sleepers. Kate caught his sudden look of
surprise and said: "I put them on you last night because the extra
absorbancy keeps the moisture from spreading so much and would help you keep
warm. I hope you don't mind."
"I guess it makes sense.
Thanks."
Kate
peeled the wet sleepers off him, and he pulled the training pants down over his
ankles. He seemed to have completely accepted being naked in front of the
Curleys. Arthur Curley bent down and swung him up into his arms. "Now its
into the tub with you for a long soak." and carried the naked little boy
off to the bathroom, Kate following with a stack of wet clothes and sheets to
put in the hamper.
Sometime later, Jonathan watched his
stepfather hang up the phone. "Well that's it Jonathan, the man you
described fits perfectly one Bob Barker. He was released last week after 5
years in the county jail for sexual assault on a minor. It turns out that he
also has a conviction that we didn't know about from another state - he missed
a warrant for his return by hours when he was released. The car you described
was reported stolen 2 days ago. He was picked up last night for speeding. Your
tennis shoes and socks were found in the car. He's not going to be bothering
any kids again for a very long time - if ever - so you don't have to worry
about him any more."
The best that could be said of school
that week was that they didn't put him back in third grade. He was glad to hear
that at the Curley's request, that had been delayed for at least a week. For
the rest, all that could be said of school for the next week, was that he lived
through it. He avoided other kids wherever possible, and made 3 to 4 trips to
the nurse's office each day, where he was told to strip, and was handed another
dry pair of pants, and another pair of trainers. Home was a refuge. Mrs. Curley
greeted him with a warm hug, dry clothes, and a sympathetic ear each afternoon.
He'd never had one before, and they would talk for hours in the kitchen.
Accustomed to her presence, he gradually let her take more part in his
dressing, usually relying on her to pick out his clothing, and to help him pull
off his wet pants and underwear.
Each evening he would wait for Curley to
arrive at the door, and would run downstairs at the sound of his voice at the
door. Curley would always greet him with a hug, and would challenge him to a
quick game of checkers before dinner, or suggest that they head down to the
shop for a bit of work on the skiff that was under construction there. After
dinner, Jonathan would sit at the kitchen table, soaking in the long stories of
Curley's years on the Boston police force, and of the Curley's other children,
and what they were up to. Curley grew in Jonathan's eyes to be everything he
could want for a father. He dreamt one night that he was Jonathan Curley, that
he'd never been Jonathan Allen, that he'd never been beaten, deserted or
starved: That he'd grown up on Spring Street, and had been a little league star
and gone off to college and - woke up in his wet bed Jonathan Allen.
Twice that week he went down stairs to
the basement laundry and helped Mrs. Curley fold his sheets, clothes and
underwear. The Curley's were surprised by his cooperative attitude, and
concluded, correctly, that he'd decided to stay. On their part, they found him
to be a sad little boy, desperately wanting for love. His rapt attention to
Curley's stories, and imitation of Curley's mannerisms amused Kate, and she
would kid Curley about it at night as they lay in bed. They rapidly came to be
very fond of the boy, despite his occasional wild bursts of temper. These were
sudden, and would have been intimidating in an older boy. The Curleys responded
calmly to them, and Arthur would simply carry the struggling boy to his room
and leave him with instructions to come out when he was through. For Jonathans
part, this was entirely new to him; the passive resistance of the Curleys to
his fits of temper or bad language was something he'd never dealt with before.
Whenever he used foul language, or got mad, they would simply stop whatever
activity was going on, and take him to his room. He'd blown up at McDonalds
when he couldn't have everything he'd wanted, and been carried, struggling,
pants dripping wet, by a silent Mr. Curley and been put in the car, meal
abandoned on the table. He'd been taken home, put into pajamas and a dry pair
of trainers, given a glass of milk, a peanut butter sandwich and put to bed.
All with no comment or discussion whatsoever. No reaction and no punishment per
se. He'd really wanted to have dinner at McDonalds too, and regretted his
outburst.
At school, Jonathan made no friends. His
treatment of Joe Kelly meant that he was not teased to his face about his wet
pants, though he did hear a lot of giggling behind his back. Generally he would
eat lunch at whatever table was empty, and then hang around in the halls
waiting for class to start. Gym class was always a nightmare, and he inevitably
had to leave early for the nurse’s office. In class he sat and listened to the
teacher, but never responded. As was his custom he made only a cursory, if any
attempt at the written work, and he avoided being called on by any stratagem.
He was greatly relieved when Friday arrived.
Saturday morning Jonathan was in the
bathroom for one of his innumerable daily rest stops, when he heard a car pull
into the driveway. He heard voices and looked out the window to see his foster
parents greeting a slim blond haired boy about his own age. His foster mother
was hugging him, and Mr. Curley was patting him on the back. They looked very
comfortable together and he felt a twinge of jealousy. It must be that Tommy
kid they were talking about. He zipped up his fly and ran down the stairs to
meet the boy walking into the front hall.
"Hi! I'm Tommy, you must be
Jonathan."
"Yeh."
"Boy are you lucky to get to live
here. I really think the Curley's are neat. Has Mr. Curley told you about his
little league team yet. It’s the best. They've won the championship 4 out of
the last 11 years. He says that I might be able to play on it this summer. You
know practice starts in two weeks. Wanta play catch this afternoon? Maybe
you'll get to play on the team too.”
Jonathan was a bit confused by this rapid
free-fire greeting, but he was even more surprised that the boy had a bag with
him.
"You staying the night?" he
queried.
"The Curley's said I could - if it’s
OK with you. Don't you want me to?"
"Well I guess so, lets go play
catch."
"OK"
Jonathan went upstairs to fetch the glove
that the Curley's had put in his room, and ran out into the yard. The boys
pitched back and forth to one another, developing a steady rhythm. A
particularly fast pitch from Tommy, however, skidded off the top of Jonathan's
glove and hit him in the face, momentarily stunning the boy, who fell backward
on the ground. Shaking himself, he angrily said "Hey! Watch it" and
started to get up. "Oh shit, you made me wet my pants!"
"No I didn't!" "Yes you
did!" "Did!" "Didn't!"
Arthur Curley, hearing the shouting
reached the scene just in time to pull the two boys apart. "Hey, hey! What
are you guys doing”? He said giving them each a little shake.
"He threw the ball at my head and
hit me. I'll bet he did it just so he cold make me wet cause he's jealous I
live here and he can't!"
"No I didn't Mr. Curley, honest. He
didn't keep his eye on the ball like you showed me, and it hit the top of his
glove."
"Yeah right!"
"Yeah right yourself! And sure I'm a
little bit jealous of you, but I like living with my mother now and want to
stay there. You’re the lucky one to be staying here - so why are you mad at me?
Besides why would I want to make you wet your pants anyway?"
"So I'd be embarrassed in front of
Mr. Curley."
"Hey, he's seen me with wet pants
too. Besides, don't you know I wet the bed too?"
"Oh - I forgot."
"You two ready to make up now?"
"Yeah."
"OK."
"Well then, lets get back to the
serious pointers of baseball and forget this Mickey Mouse. If you two are going
to play for my team you're going to have to be pretty sharp, so you better
loosen up here. Jonathan, you missed that ball because you didn't keep your eye
on it. A lot of boys flinch when a ball comes toward their face. But that's the
best way to get hit there is. If you just concentrate on keeping your eye on
the ball - like magic - the ball will be in your glove every time. Your body
will do the rest of the work by itself. Here, you stand back a bit and I'll
show. Now first I'm going to throw you a real easy pitch and I want to see how
you catch it. There, now ----."
Curley wove his particular coaches spell
around the two boys, who were drawn-in first to the fascination of the game,
then into working together to tag Curley in a game of box-the-runner. Curley
was good, and ran the two boys ragged. At the end of two hours, they were like
brothers. Pleased with himself, he called a halt: "Ok guys, time to head
in for lunch. It also looks like you are a bit water logged Jonathan - how
about a stop at the upstairs dry-cleaners on the way to lunch.
"Oh" said Jonathan, somewhat
surprised to notice that a change was long overdue, "I forgot."
"Come on, Tommy can put his bag in
your room while we get you changed."
They headed back into the house and
clumped noisily up the stairs. Jonathan was quite capable of dressing himself,
he realized and wondered just how he'd gotten into the routine of having the
Curley's dress him. He knew that only little kids had to be dressed by their
parents - so he was a little embarrassed as Mr. Curley unzipped his pants and
pulled his trousers and training pants down. He blushed even harder when the
training pants were exposed to Tommy interested view and braced himself for a
comment."
"Hey! Those are neat. Training
pants! I bet they'd work a whole lot better if you wore plastic baby pants on
top of them."
With a jolt, Jonathan realized that the
kid wasn't teasing him. Even more so when he heard Tommy continue:
"Boy! How come you never let me wear
those, Mr. Curley?"
"Well, you rarely wet during the
daytime, Tommy. But if you want, you can wear a pair of Jonathan's now."
This exchange flabbergasted Jonathan, and
amazed he watched Tommy strip off his pants and pull on the trainers that Mr.
Curley held out for him to step into.
"Neato!" Tommy spun around
modeling the pants, and ran out through the hall to look at himself in the
bathroom mirror. "Wow!" Jonathan heard "They look just like my
baby three year old cousin's! And they feel great, almost as good as
diapers."
Curley was greatly amused by the
slack-jawed expression on his foster son's face, and smiled to himself, both at
Tommy's antics, and in anticipation of the further revelations the day was
going to bring to Jonathan. He reached down and held open a second pair of
training pants for Jonathan to step into and pulled them up onto his hips.
After finishing dressing Jonathan in shorts T-shirt and tennis shoes, he called
Tommy back in from the mirror and helped him with his shorts as well. Back
downstairs there were chocolate milkshakes and grilled cheese sandwiches served
with a smile by Mrs. Curley.
"Now I have both my little boys with
me. What fun to see you together, I think you two should be great
friends."
The talk rolled on from that point, with
the Curley's catching up on Tommy's doings and events in his mother's life.
They were both careful to include Jonathan at all points in the conversation,
who seemed to open up in the warm atmosphere of the kitchen. It turned out that
Tommy was one grade ahead of Jonathan, and he greatly sympathized with
Jonathan's predicament, but pointed out that: "It’s sure lucky those
little guys have you in their class to protect them. The whole school was
talking about how you fixed that Joe Kelly." This made Jonathan feel quite
good. By the time the last of the pecan sandies had been consumed in was 3:30
and Mr. Curley suggested that they head down to the little league field for
some batting practice.
They returned from the field at 5:30.
Though Jonathan had enjoyed the practice, he'd had trouble connecting with the
ball. Mr. Curley attributed this to inexperience and said that he'd improve. He
was again soaked, and had been embarrassed by the rather pointed comments of
one of the other little league coaches, Lou Harrison, who'd also been down
practicing with his two boys before the season started. Harrison considered
himself Curley's chief rival, and took particular pleasure in the fact, as he
termed it to his friends, that he'd stomped Curley's ass last year in the
play-offs. This annoyed Curley mainly from the point of view that he didn't
consider that the coaches were there to compete with each other, but rather for
the purpose of helping kids. While he'd had his share of wins, he'd rather have
a losing season with every kid playing, than have a winning one with a quarter
of the team on the bench. Harrison had no such qualms, and had been twice
reprimanded by the league for "forgetting" to play several of his
weaker players in key games.
Jonathan wasn't in the best of moods as
he trudged up stairs to his room behind Curley and Tommy. As Curley was
dressing him, he heard Tommy giggling.
"You know these things would work a
whole lot better with plastic baby pants."
When he looked up at Tommy, he could see
a dark stain spreading on the front of his shorts.
"Alright, Tommy, I agree, but would
you try not to drip on the rug." Mr. Curley said in an amused but
exasperated tone.
Tommy
giggled some more, "I just wanted to see how these worked, and what they
felt like wet. They're not as nice as diapers wet. Too cold, with the air on
them through your shorts, they're not thick enough to keep you warm. "Can
we get ready for bed before dinner," he inquired."
"Sure, wait one moment Tommy."
Jonathan watched in stunned silence as
Curley left the room briefly, coming back with a large padded plastic changing
mat covered with baby teddy bears that he laid on the bed. Tommy grinned, and
hopped up on it and lay on his back. He lifted up his fanny as Curley slid the
wet shorts and training pants off him, and lay back with a happy expression on
his face as Curley produced a washrag and wiped him off. He then took out a
bottle of baby oil and spread it over Tommy's bottom and all around his diaper
area, paying particular attention to the area between his legs and his little
rectum. Curley then went over to Tommy's overnight bag and opened it.
Jonathan's eyes went wide. The bag was full of diapers! Curley took 4 big
diapers out of the bag and folded them expertly as Tommy again lifted up his
hips. Sliding them under Tommy's fanny he brought the diapers up between his
legs and reached back in the bag and brought out four diaper pins that he held
up.
"I like these turtles Tommy, they're
really cute. Where did you get them."
"I bought them with my allowance
from the baby store. They're my favorites, I'll bet the clerk would be
surprised if she knew I'd bought them for myself."
"Maybe she would - but then again
maybe you're not the only boy whose ever shown more than idle curiosity about
the contents of that store Tommy." With this, he pinned the diapers
tightly together around Tommy, two at a time, and reached over and took a pair
of frosty plastic pants and put them over the boy’s ankles. Standing Tommy up,
he pulled them up over his waist. He then ran his fingers around the elastic
enclosing Tommy’s legs, tucking in stray bits of diaper. "Do you want your
sleepers on now or latter."
"Now; I want to try on the new ones
Aunt Kate made for me."
Jonathan looked on as Mr. Curley brought
out a pair of snap-waisted sleepers made of the same cloth as the zippered ones
he'd worn that night. When these were put onto Tommy, the boy looked just like
a toddler, with the elastic around the back of the waist making the diaper bulge
under the flannel bottoms all the more obvious - particularly on his behind.
"You look really cute Tommy, your
Aunt Kate will be really pleased". Tommy ran out of the room again,
waddling slightly from the thick diapers to see himself in the bathroom mirror.
He then disappeared down the stairs, and as Jonathan was coming down with Mr.
Curley, he could hear Mrs. Curley commenting on how nice they looked to the
enthusiastic Tommy. "They do look just like the ones your little cousin
Luke had on when he visited, particularly with such thick diapers. I'm glad you
like them."
Jonathan felt a little left out, and a
little bit jealous of all the attention Tommy was getting over something that
he'd always thought of as a boy's worst nightmare. It was clear that Tommy
didn't mind his diapers. In fact he actually thoroughly enjoyed them and all
the attention that went along with them. It had been an eye opener when he'd
peered into Tommy's suitcase before coming down to dinner: it was full of extra
diapers! It seemed like Tommy had come really prepared.
At dinner the conversation turned to
Tommy's diapers and how well they worked. The discussion revolved around
different kinds of plastic pants, and what he liked best now. Kate was
particularly interested in the new prefolded diapers his mother was making for
him.
"Yeh! They're really terrific, she
likes then because she doesn't have to do a lot of folding, and one is perfect
for daytime, although she always puts two on me at night. Its great not having
a wet bed all the time. I think they're really neat. Besides, he grinned, I
don't have to get out of bed on cold nights just to go to the bathroom."
After dinner the boys went into the
living room to watch a Star Wars video that Curley had picked up on
the way home. As Curley was inserting the cassette in the VCR, Tommy plunked
himself down on the couch, and Jonathan followed him.
"Hop up off the couch Jonathan, your
foster mother would cream you, and serve you up for stew if you got her new
furniture wet. You can sit in the wooden rocker with a towel under you or you
can lie on the floor."
"Jeez! It's no fair." Jonathan
got up and sat down on the floor disgustedly. "How come Tommy gets to sit
there?"
"As you can plainly see, Tommy would
have to try pretty hard to wet the couch the way he's fixed up. I can't see
that it would be very fair to penalize him for your problem."
"Hey it's cool. I'd rather lie on
the floor with Jonathan anyway." Tommy hopped off the couch and lay on his
tummy in front of the TV next to Jonathan with his feet in the air. Kate came
in and sat on the couch next to her husband. After a while Curley chuckled
softly in her ear: "I think you're spending more time admiring that cute
little diapered rear end than you are Star
Wars."
"Well," she whispered,
"its pretty cute, with that new sleeper, his fanny looks just like Billy's
as a toddler. It really pokes up with that elastic along the back pulling the
sleeper in just above the diaper. You really put thick diapers on him, and they
really bunch up between his legs."
"He certainly looks happy enough,
I'll bet he's not very dry in there."
She laughed, "I think that was the
point of getting diapered up so early, he's looking forward to an extra change
before bed. I'll be only to happy to comply - I've missed my little
cutey."
"At the present rate, honey, I don't
think it's going to take our other young man too long to get the message."
"I hope you're right, it really
hurts me to see him so miserable all the time. I'm really worrying about what's
happening at school. We ought to see what we can do to help. You know, I don't
think he's read a book, or looked at the funny papers the entire week he's been
here. Do you suppose he has a reading problem?"
After the movie was over, Curley sounded
taps: "Bedtime boys! Last one up is a bug-eyed tree frog with purple
teeth."
"Tree frogs don't have purple
teeth!" Jonathan replied.
"Well you sure will if you don't get
up there and brush - now!"
The boys scuttled up the stairs, and Kate
and Curley headed after them. Arriving in the bedroom, Kate went over and
unsnapped the front of Tommy's pajamas and pulled the bottoms down. She reached
under the leg and ran here finger around under the elastic. "Pretty water
logged Tommy." Tommy giggled. "OK, up on the changing mat (which was
lying there from before dinner, Curley not having removed it from previous
experience)."
Jonathan stood there and watched while
his foster mother fussed over his friend, who was giggling and smiling as he
was changed in front of the entire group. He seemed to enjoy everyone watching
and put up a show. Kate enjoyed it too, and played along, tickling Tommy at
various moments under the arms and on his feet. "You are such a little
squirmer!" She exclaimed, "You'd better hold still, or I'm going to
pin you to this diaper by
mistake." Tommy's legs were lifted up over his head, exposing his little
rectum to full view, and he visibly relaxed with a small sigh of pleasure as
Kate poured baby oil on his bottom and rubbed it in. Dropping his legs, she oiled
the rest of his diaper area, and then gave his tummy a little massage and a
pat. "We oil him up well, Jonathan, so that he doesn't get a diaper rash.
They're really nasty, and preventing one is really important." She then
placed 4 thick folded diapers under him as he lifted his fanny like a pro, and
pinned him up. She pulled his plastic pants back up, followed by the pajama
bottoms that she snapped first around the front and then rolled him over and
did the back. Giving him a light little swat on his padded tail, she said:
"OK hop up, I've got to get Jonathan ready for bed too.
Tommy hopped off the bed and grinned at
Jonathan, who was feeling more than a little left out.
"I want the top bunk." Tommy
said. "It may rain on me if Jonathan sleeps up there."
"Very funny." He replied.
He looked over and he could see his
foster father straightening the sheets on his bed. "Do you think that we
should put an extra soaker pad on the bottom? It would help keep the rest of
the bed dryer, and it probably would be warmer."
"Its a good idea dear, there may be
another dry one out in the hall closet." She was busy sorting through
Jonathan's bureau getting out a pair of training pants, and a pair of ordinary
flannel ski pajamas. "These are your last pair of PJ's; we’re going to
have to do a big load of wash together tomorrow Jonathan if you're going to
have a dry pair for tomorrow night," she said shaking out the bright red
pajamas.
They were kinda neat, with a logo on them
and yellow cuffs. Jonathan liked them, and thought to himself that it was too
bad that he'd wear them only one night. He was really causing a lot of extra
laundry. He suddenly realized that he hated making the Curley's do all this
extra work. "Uh - Mrs. Curley, uh - you know, maybe I oughta wear some
stuff like Tommy." He couldn't believe he'd said that. "It would
really help you guys out and all, and you wouldn't have to change my sheets so
much and everything." He gasped. He looked up at her shaking, just a
little teary-eyed."
Kate looked down at the little boy.
"Why Jonathan - how thoughtful of you! It really would be a big help. You
do mean diapers and baby pants like Tommy's don't you." It was a statement
- not a question." She bent over and gave him an enormous hug. He was so scared
he wet his pants again. Kate gave a little start and Jonathan started to cry he
was so upset at having wet Mrs. Curley. "That's OK Jonathan, I've had
little boys get me wet before. Its no big deal", and she hugged him even
more tightly. "Jonathan you don't have to wear diapers just to make less
work for us. We want you to be happy, and if you're really going to be
embarrassed by them, we prefer to do the extra wash."
"Well, maybe I'd be more comfortable
too. I'm kinda tired of wet sheets and all. I mean it might be better for all
of us." Jonathan, now that his suggestion was out, was considering the
possibilities in more detail. "It could be just for tonight; if I don't
like them and all, I won't have to wear them again. Don't you think we should
at least try it? Besides, you let Tommy wear them." A powerful clinching
argument as far as he was concerned. He couldn't believe he was actually
arguing to be put back into diapers. I must be going crazy, he thought.
"Boy! I can vouch for their being
more comfortable,” Tommy echoed from the top bunk. "I think it's a great
idea Aunt Kate. Jonathan can use some of mine, I've got plenty."
"That won't be necessary Tommy, I
think we can find some extras around here. We kept a supply back when you left
just in case they might be useful sometime. Well young man, if you really want
to try them, hop up on the changing mat after I get your wet clothes off.
Curley, would you get some diapers and plastic pants for Jonathan off the top
shelf of the linen closet and bring them in here,” she called. "Jonathan
says he'd like to try them out tonight." While she was marshalling these
resources, she stripped the little boy, unbuckling the belt on his pants,
undoing the zipper, and pulling them down, then peeling the wet trainers down
from his waist. After stripping his T-shirt with the traditional
"skin-the-rabbit” she gave him a light spank on the behind, propelling him
up onto the changing mat.
Jonathan lay down nervously on the
changing mat. He was still quivering a little bit, and he felt highly
embarrassed. He could see Mr. Curley smile at him as he came into the room with
a big stack of white fluffy diapers neatly folded in his arm and several pairs
of frosty white plastic pants. He came over and stood next to Jonathan. He
could also see Tommy peering down at him from over the edge of the top bunk.
Jonathan had been undressed around people before, but he'd never felt this
naked! He nervously crossed his legs, hiding his little penis and balls a bit
from view. His foster mother smiled "Its OK dear, we've all seen this
before, and you know the routine because you got to watch Tommy being changed.
Now just spread your legs apart and I'll take care of everything."
"I'm awfully big to be wearing
diapers."
"Of course you are dear, you're a
big boy, but you are not the only big boy whose wearing diapers tonight. Lots
of boys your age still wet the bed, and some of the happier ones will be
dressed just like you."
Though still nervous, this made him relax
a bit. He could feel the sudden wet chill of the washrag as she started to wash
his diaper area and flinched just a bit. He was rewarded by a little poke in
the ribs, and he giggled a little. It was the first time he'd been tickled by
anyone in 7 years. It made him squirm, but it was fun. Everyone laughed with
him. He then felt her lift his ankles up and swing them over his head, bending
him over and pulling his bottom up into everyone's view. He felt totally
helpless in this position, but a strange sensation of pleasure filled him as
she washed, and then oiled his little behind - giving a little start when she
briefly rubbed some oil onto his little hole. She massaged his fanny a little
bit more and then set his legs down. As his fanny settled back down he felt the
thick cloth diapers beneath him instead of the hard plastic of the changing
mat. His foster father must have slid them there while he was being oiled. He
tensed a little bit as he felt the soft cloth, and as Kate put baby oil on his
genitals, between his legs, and over the front of his tummy. Then he heard her
softly tell him to spread his legs apart, and felt the thick diapers come up
between his legs, cradling his little penis and balls. He suddenly realized he
had his eyes closed tightly shut, and opened them and looked down to see his foster
mother pinning the diapers together with little yellow ducky pins, snugging the
diapers tightly around his waist.
"Lift your legs up dear." and a
pair of the frosty white baby pants were pulled over his ankles and up his
legs. She then swiveled his feet to the ground and stood him up, pulling the
plastic pants up over the thick diapers. "Now lets put your pajamas on.
There!" she exclaimed, "All ready for a dry night in bed." Tommy
looked down at him and giggled: now you look just like me - and my three year
old cousin."
"Not quite, I've got superman
pajamas, and you've got snap sleepers on."
"I like my sleepers, Aunt Kate made
them for me, and little Lukie has superman pajamas too!"
"OK, guys into the bathroom and
brush your teeth. If you hurry, I'll read you a story, I've got a special one
I've been saving up.
Both boys ran to the bathroom. Jonathan
felt very strange with the thick diapers between his legs. They forced his legs
apart a bit as he walked. First to arrive at the sink, he brushed quickly and
went and stood in front of the mirror while Tommy brushed his. Tommy's right,
he thought chagrined. Standing there, he did look very much like a little
three-year-old toddler with great big thick diapers bulging under the flannel
ski pajamas. Still, he thought, it feels good not to have to worry about
wetting myself. Suddenly he felt a sense of physical, and emotional, security
that he'd not felt since - forever. Once long ago, he knew, he'd felt like
this, but he'd almost forgotten.
Tommy came over to him and stood next to
him by the mirror. "We both look like toddlers don't we?"
"Yeh. I guess your right. Feels
kinda strange don’t it?" He smiled a little embarrassed at his new friend.
"You know I'm glad you came over. Thanks."
"I can't explain exactly why, but I
really like being a toddler some of the time,” Tommy replied. "The guy I
go to for counseling says its because my mother tried to make me grow up too
fast or something. Maybe he's right, but all I know is I feel real good inside
when I have my diapers on. I'm really glad you decided to wear them. It's nice
to have someone else to wear them with. We oughta be friends forever." He
put his arm on Jonathan shoulders.
Jonathan suddenly realized that they were
friends. He wasn't certain what that meant, but he knew that this was the first
one he'd ever had. He turned and hugged Tommy.
"Come on!" Tommy exclaimed,
"Lets get back so Uncle Curley will read us a story."
When they returned to the room, Curley
was sitting on the bed waiting for them, a copy of The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe by C.S. Lewis open in his
hands. Tommy immediately climbed up next to him and snuggled close, with his
head on Curley's shoulders. Jonathan looked a bit confused at first, not having
been read to in a long-long time. But when Curley patted the spot next to him
on the bed with his big hand, he hopped up and sat there. After a while, as
Curley read, he too leaned his head against Curley's shoulder. He could feel
his stepfather’s great strong body next to his, and felt wonderfully safe and
secure. All the while, the magic of C.S. Lewis's great story and his foster
father’s strong gentle voice, wove dreams around his head. It was a story about
some English children, about their own age, and their trip to a magic place
called Narnia where the kids had all kinds of adventures and became kings, and
princes and princesses, before being sent back home to be children again.
Somehow, on the trip the children learned about good and evil, and what made
you a decent chap. It was a wonderful story and made you feel good inside, and
that the world could be a decent place if everyone tried hard enough.
Both the boys spent the entire morning
the next day racing around the house playing at being kings and lions, fighting
the wicked forces of winter, and stopping evil from conquering the Kingdom of
Narnia. Being a white knight fighting for the forces of good was an entirely
new fantasy for young Jonathan, and provided a gentle, but key, push in an
important new direction in his life. It had never occurred to the young boy
that it was better to respond to bad things - by making good things happen.
In the middle of the night, Jonathan woke
up to hear rain beating on the window. He could feel a chill in the room from
the spring gale pushing up against the window, and hunched down under the warm
covers as thunder clapped over the house. It was warm and dry, and he snuggled
under the blankets, falling to sleep again to the steady drum of rain on the
window.
He heard the bird singing by the window,
and opened his eyes to see sun streaming in. The air was crystal clear beyond
the window, and only a few white fluffy clouds were gently floating past, their
outline sharp against the clear blue of the spring morning sky. He stretched
lazily, his legs sliding deliciously across the dry sheets of his bed. He felt
strange, everything was different. Except for the bird, the whole house was
still. He lay there thinking about his world and how it had changed. Though he
was still really scared about school, he was happy living here. It felt really
good in bed.
He suddenly realized why it felt so
strange. First off, his bed was dry for the first time in a month. Even more
important, he was wearing diapers! He lay there analyzing and inventorying the
sensation. He could feel the bulky diapers between his legs. They felt very wet
- but warm and snugly too. He spread his legs apart and then closed them again,
pinching the thick folds of the diapers with his thighs. He could just get his
ankles to touch. Then he ran his hands down beneath the covers to the waist of
his pajamas and slid them under over the plastic pants. In the warm bed the
plastic felt soft and reassuring. He ran his hands over its smooth surface
feeling its texture against the wet diapers beneath. Then down around the leg
elastic: pushing his finger under the edge and feeling the moist cloth beneath.
He then brought his hand up to his waist and slid it between the plastic and
the diaper. Boy was the diaper wet! He pushed the warm wet sodden mass against
his crotch. That feels pretty good! He realized. He wondered if babies felt
this way about their diapers. Withdrawing his hand from the plastic pants he
put it up to his nose, smelling the warm wet salty-sweet smell of the urine on
his palm. Then he slid his hand back down over his pajama bottoms, doing a tour
around his waist, down along the edge of the plastic pants around his legs.
Everywhere his pajamas were dry! It felt really good to be dry. He felt back
and patted his own thickly padded behind. Suddenly he had to pee. He started to
get up, but then, turned onto his tummy and let go. He felt wonderfully wicked
enjoying the sweet delight of breaking a deep taboo. He lay there a minute as
the warm pee spread out over his tummy. He could feel it climbing up where the
diapers passed between his legs towards his bottom. The extra warmth felt good.
He then nervously pushed his hands down and ran them over the sheet beneath
him, and conducted another tour over the front of his pajamas. Everything was
perfectly, wonderfully dry! He rolled over on his back, and smiled looking out
the window at singing bird.
After a while he began to hear noises as
the rest of the family awakened. There were stirrings above him.
"Jonathan?"
"Yeh?"
"You dry or wet?"
"Well my beds dry, but my diapers
sure aren't, how about you?"
"I'm pretty soaked too." Tommy
hopped down out of the bed and stood on the floor. Jonathan realized that he
thought that his friend looked kinda cute in his sleepers. "You really
look like a little toddler in those sleepers," he grinned pulling his
covers off and sitting up on the edge of the bunkbed.
"Goo-goo." Tommy replied
dropping to his hands and knees and scuttling around the floor laughing.
"You look just like a little kid too."
Jonathan looked down at the enormous
bulge of his diapers under his tight superman ski pajamas and thought "boy
is that ever true." On impulse he hopped down on the floor too and started
to crawl around. "Me wet - me need change!" he lisped. Tommy giggled.
Soon the two boys were tumbling around the floor tickling each other and
laughing. Finally, Jonathan rolled on top of Tommy and straddled his chest.
Sitting that way made the thick bulge of his wet diapers press up between his
legs and crotch, and he suddenly realized that he liked the feeling. "You
know wet diapers kinda feel good don't they?"
Tommy nodded agreement. "Hey lets
head down to breakfast now, that way we won't get changed till later and we can
wear our wet diapers longer."
Both boys headed downstairs and ran into
the kitchen where Kate was starting the coffee and making juice. She looked at
her two boys and smiled, enjoying their babyish appearance and anticipating the
pleasure of changing them both. "No you don't Tommy, I'm onto your arriving
early to avoid getting changed until after breakfast. You and Jonathan scoot
back upstairs and wait for me. I don't want you to get diaper rash from sitting
around in the same wet diapers all day. You need to get dried out periodically
unless you want to have a really nasty set of sores in your diaper area."
To her surprise, the obvious look of disappointment was mirrored in Jonathan's
face as well. "If you two haven't had enough diapers, I'll change you into
dry ones and you can wear them all day if you like."
"Hey that would be cool, then
Jonathan can sit on the couch with me to watch TV. How about it Jonathan?"
Jonathan decided that it would be OK as
long as no one else saw them besides his foster parents, and both boys scuttled
back up the stairs. When they got there, Jonathan's foster father was lugging a
low bureau with a large top into his room. He looked over at Jonathan and
smiled: "your changing table young man, we used this for Tommy too when he
was here, but didn't know if we would need it for you or not. It’s a lot more
convenient because it has room for all your diapers and baby pants in the
drawers, and there is a shelf for baby oil and powder. You can also hang your
diaper pail on the side and it has a place for washcloths. You'll really like
it."
Tommy smiled at the memory - he'd liked
being changed on it. Some how it seemed more authentic to be on a real changing
table than lying on a low bed. "I claim first on the changing table."
Chapter 3
School Again!
Monday morning came. Tommy was awakened
by his foster parents, who came in and gently shook his shoulder. When he
rolled over, they smiled down at the boy, and his foster mother leaned over and
gave him a kiss. "You have a big day today young man. It's your third week
in 4th grade and you want to be there on time."
"But I thought Mr. Miller said I'd
be put back to third grade today!" Jonathan replied.
"That's yet to be seen, you know
that your foster mother called Mr. Miller, and he agreed to hold off. We're all
having a conference with Mr. Miller today after school, and we'll discuss what
comes next. Your foster mother and I don't think that your going back another
grade is a very good idea."
"Me neither! I don't want to go back
with those little kids at all. It'd be awful. I'll do better, I promise!"
"We know you'll try your best dear,”
his foster mother said. She'd pulled the covers off him while they were
talking, and pulled off his pajama bottoms exposing his diapered bottom.
"Hand me the changing mat dear." As Curley handed it to her she slid
it under Jonathans upraised bottom, and then pulled off his plastic pants, and
unpinned his diapers. "You are such a little rainmaker." and she ran
her fingers up his tummy. Jonathan squealed and squirmed. "OK, now up and
at-em tiger. Go comb your teeth and brush your hair and your foster father will
get your clothes out for you."
"You mean brush my teeth and comb my
hair," Jonathan giggled."
"Well now you certainly can't claim
that you didn't understand what I want you to do - now scoot!"
Jonathan ran off to the bathroom while
Curley pulled out a dry pair of training pants, some levis, and a knit shirt
with a big green grinning crocodile on it. It had Florida Leprechaun in bright red letters above it, and a shamrock
hanging from its mouth. Jonathan really liked the shirt when he came back.
After dressing him, Mr. Curley hoisted him on his back and gave him a piggyback
ride down the stairs and into the kitchen.
"Don't you two roughouse unless
Jonathan's diapered. Otherwise both of you are going to get all wet, and
Curley's a lot harder to change than you are Jonathan."
"Aww that's not fair."
"Say, it might be fun to have you
change me dear. Hey Jonathan wanta have a tickle fight." Jonathan giggled.
"That's enough, both of you. Eat
your breakfast.
When Jonathan arrived back in class that
morning, Mrs.Hanlin was not pleased. While she'd been willing to go along with
the experiment initially, Jonathan's continuous wetting was more of a
disruption than she'd bargained for. More importantly, the boy had sat in the
back of the room sullenly for two weeks now. None of his written work was
legible, and he had yet to answer a question correctly in class. She didn't
really have it in for Jonathan, but had been looking forward to her classroom
returning to normal. "Good morning Jonathan," I hadn't expected to
see you back here this morning, and I rearranged the desks this weekend. Why
don't you take the one by the door. Suzy, you move your stuff over to the desk
next to the aquarium. Yes, I know it’s always been your desk, but it may only
be for a while."
Jonathan's heart sank. The desk by the
door was in the front row. He'd be clearly visible all the time to the entire
class. He waited for a very cross-looking Susan Brown to move her things across
the room, and then sat self-consciously down. He sat there immobile for the
entire morning, raising his hand only twice to go to the bathroom. Just before
lunch he was staring at the clock waiting for the little hand to reach 12 so he
could escape."
"Jonathan!"
"Oh. Yes Mrs. Hanlin."
"I asked you what was 7 time
9."
Jonathan looked at her with a blank
stare.
"Don't you know?"
"45?"
The class giggled.
"Jonathan, stand up and face the
class." Jonathan stood and turned slowly around. He didn't feel too good
all of a sudden. The kids were all whispering and giggling. "Jonathan, I
want you to say your times tables now - starting with one times one and go all
the way up to ten times ten." Jonathan felt his ears ringing; the whole
world seemed to be staring at him. "Jonathan! Don't you even know your
times tables? How can you be in 4th grade if you don't know that! You belong
down in the third grade!"
The entire class shrieked with laughter.
Jonathan had wet his pants standing in front of the entire class. "Baby
baby baby. Baby baby baby. Baby baby baby." They entire class was
chanting. Mrs. Hanlin first looked disgusted. Then it slowly came over her what
she had just done to this poor little boy. "Class be quiet."
"Baby baby baby"
"I said be quiet. Now!"
At that moment the bell rang, and the
kids streamed out leaving Jonathan standing in a puddle, tears streaming down
his face. After the last kid had left the room, Mrs. Hanlin went slowly over to
Jonathan and put her hand on his shoulder. He shrugged it off. She sat down on
the desk next to him and waited quietly as the boy sobbed. She watched his
little shoulders heave up and down. After a while she reached out, placed her
hand on his tear stained little cheek, and turned his face gently towards her.
"Jonathan, I don't think I've ever
done a meaner thing in my life, and I'm sorry. Your wetting has been a terrible
disruption here in class, and I'm afraid I lost my patience with you. You never
answer my questions, and you just sulk in the back of the room. You haven't
handed in any passing work the whole time you've been here, and you don't seem
to even try. But none of that excuses me. I hope you will forgive me."
The little boy bolted from the room.
Jonathan ran down the hallway and out the
back door. He wanted to go home, and had every intention of going the two miles
to his house on foot. He'd never go back to that school. Never! He hated
everybody there.
Mrs. Hanlin ran from her classroom. The
boy was nowhere to be seen. Laden with remorse she went down sadly to Mr.
Millers office for help.
Outside the school, Jonathan was climbing
over the high chain link fence that went round the back yard. The kids weren't
allowed back there, and there were dumpsters and garbage cans stacked to one
side, a loading dock, and a narrow alleyway between two buildings leading back
to the front of the school.
"Leave me alone you bully!"
It was a girl’s voice, shaking with anger
and a note of fear in it. He stopped climbing.
"Give it here sweetheart or your
pretty little dress is gonna get all mussed up."
It was Joe Kelly's voice. He heard a
scuffle and the nasty laughter of a couple of other boys. There was a ripping
noise and a short muffled shriek. He jumped down from the fence and ran across
the yard into the alleyway. There ahead of him were three boys. One of them was
holding his hand over a girls mouth, one was yanking at a small purse clutched
tightly in her hand, and another was pummeling her. The girl was putting up a
brave struggle but went suddenly still when the boy dropped his hold on the
purse and produce a nasty looking knife.
"I told you you'd get all messed up
if you didn't pay up sweet heart, and now you’re going to get cut just a little
to teach you a lesson." Jonathan gave a shout. Joe Kelly turned and looked
at the onrushing boy. "Oh its baby pants wetter. The whole school is
laughing at you after you pissed your pants in Mrs. Hanlin’s class."
Jonathan skidded to a stop in front of
him. Jonathan was a very street wise ten year old, and from a much tougher district
than Joe Kelly operated in. Knives were nothing new to him. The girl stopped
struggling and looked at the two boys facing each other as she was held by
Kelly's two sniggering cronies.
"I see that you've switched to
picking on girls now. Boys to much for you Kelly!"
"Well well, all that from a little
piss pants. Well why don't you go piss in them somewhere else little boy. This
is where the big boys play and you might get your little widdle bottom spanked
by this big bad boy."
"I may be a piss pants, but this
little piss pants is going to beat the living crap out of you."
Kelly glared and started to advance.
"Oh! Jonathan exclaimed and dropping
open his mouth turned his head sharply glancing up the alley behind Joe Kelly.
Kelly, catching Jonathan's unexpected movement, glanced back quickly over his
shoulder in the direction he thought Jonathan was looking. He turned his head
back just in time to receive a karate kick square in the mouth. Blood spurted
from his cut lips and he gave a cry. Jonathan, as he came down, slapped Joe
Kelly's wrist so that the hand holding the knife went past him, and drove his
knee for the second time in a week directly into the dazed boys crotch. As
Kelly fell to the ground, Jonathan did a knee drop directly into his solar plexus.
Kelly gasped and rolled on the ground struggling for breath. Jonathan kicked
the knife lying on the ground across the alley and turned to the other two boys
who had let go of the girl and were rushing at him. The quick witted girl,
reached out and tripped the rearmost who put an arm out and skidded in the
gravel. He gave a scream of pain as the skin on both hands peeled off on the
pavement. The other, Jonathan side stepped, caught off balance and using his
own momentum, slammed him headfirst into the wall of the alleyway knocking him
dizzy and putting him out of the combat. He walked over, picked up the knife,
drove the blade between two bricks and snapped the blade, throwing the stump
contemptuously on the ground next to Joe Kelly, who wouldn't be able to move
for another 15 minutes, but would live, painfully, for at least another week.
"Thanks a lot Jonathan."
"Huh! You know me?"
"We're both in Mrs Hanlin’s class
together silly."
"Oh!" He said reddening with
embarrassment as the events of the morning came back to him.
"How'd you ever learn to fight like
that."
"The school I went to had a Karate
class for kids. You aren't supposed to use it except for sport. But when you
live on the streets there's no such thing as fair. So I got to practice it a
lot."
"I guess it's good you know it, but
it scares me a bit. You know, I didn't laugh at you with the other kids in
class. I know it’s not your fault you wet your pants. Besides, she grinned,
I've always thought you were kind of cute. And now you'll just have to get used
to being my hero," she smiled. "Lets get back to class, I don't think
that those guys will want to bother anyone else today." She said glancing
at the moaning forms behind them.
As they walked back to class together -
the last place he'd expected to go back to that day - she kept up a steady
stream of conversation, drawing him out. She lived two blocks from him. Her
name was Sarah, and she thought that she really ought to be in fifth grade
since her birthday was right on the line, and besides she was the smartest kid
in class. She wanted to play little league this year, and was he really living
with coach Curley. She wanted to be on his team, it was the best. As they
walked back, she steered them through the side door and down the hall by the
nurse’s office.
"Maybe you ought to stop by here
before we go back to class. I'll wait here."
Jonathan turned bright red. "Oh go
on," she said, "you're not bad looking in wet pants, but I'm sure
you're more comfortable in dry ones," giving him a little shove.
"Well Jonathan, how did little Sarah
get her hooks into you. Better watch out for her young man, she'll hog tie you
and hang you in her closet," the nurse greeted him as he was propelled by
Sarah through the door. Sarah stuck her tongue out at Marylin Jackoby, and then
grinned. Marylin laughed and said "Just wait till we get home young lady,
I'm going to glue that tongue to the garage door, and then open it." OK
mom, but you'll have to get dad to fix it first - which will take at least a
week and I'll miss my dentist appointment - Oh dear, I'll be so upset."
"You go wait outside and give
Jonathan a little privacy."
"OK mom. By the way Jonathan just
stopped Joe Kelly and a couple of his thugs from mugging me in the yard. Joe
had a knife, but Jonathan took it away from him and accidently broke it before
giving it back."
The girl scooted out the door. Nurse
Jackoby looked down at Jonathan thoughtfully. Her daughter, though very
unconventional, never lied, and for her to admit that someone had had to bail
her out of a situation was an almost unheard of occurrence. The torn dress also
had not gone unnoticed. Despite the tone of the delivery, the message was
clear: "I was in big trouble mom, and he helped me out." Jonathan had
just acquired a major new ally at Brookline Elementary.
"There must be more to you young man
than a lot of people think, my daughter doesn't select her friends lightly, and
it looks like she's taken a considerable liking to you. It also seems that I
have you to thank for helping her out of a very bad situation. Now lets get you
fixed up and back to class."
Sarah and Jonathan arrived back at class
together just as the bell rang. Mrs. Hanlin was considerably relieved to see
Jonathan return to class, and noted with some surprise that he and her star, if
somewhat burdensome, pupil had obviously made some connection. That at least
was a good sign. She made a point of letting Jonathan sit quietly through the
class for the rest of the afternoon. When the bell rang, she asked Jonathan to
wait a moment. After children had rushed from the room, she saw that Sarah was
waiting for Jonathan by the door. "I just want you to know Jonathan, that
if you want I'm going to give you a chance here, but you are going to have to
meet me half way. I'm looking forward to meeting with your foster parents this
afternoon, and I'm hoping that we can work out something to help you out."
Jonathan nodded his head. "I am
trying Mrs. Hanlin."
Mrs. Hanlin didn't press the point and
said he could go. She was glad at least that Jonathan had found a friend,
though this was hardly a boy that she'd thought Sarah Jackoby would have picked
as a companion.
Sarah sat with Jonathan on the bus and
got off with him at his stop. The trip was a long one due to an accident, and
by the time they left the bus together he was wet again. Sarah didn't say a
thing. Jonathan was to find out that he had acquired the most loyal of friends.
She walked with him to his house, and introduced herself to Jonathan's foster
mother, who invited her in. Kate smiled. "I'm happy to see that Jonathan's
acquired a new friend. I'm afraid a lot of kids wouldn't want to be seen with
him because of his problem."
"That's OK, I know it’s not his
fault. My mom's a nurse, and she explained all about Jonathan to me. I think
he's pretty terrific, you should have seen him take care of that bully Joe
Kelly today when he tried to take my purse. Besides, Jonathan's prreettty
cute,” she grinned wickedly at the blushing boy.
"Well cute or not, we better get
some clean clothes on you young man. You wait here Sarah, and Jonathan will be
right down. If you want to stay and play, you call your mother and tell her
you’re here, though in an hour I'm dropping Jonathan off at my sister-in-laws
because I have to go to a conference at his school."
"Could he come over to my house to
play instead?"
"Well, that's up to Jonathan, you
know he might need a change over there."
"That's OK, my mom's the school
nurse, and she's changed Jonathan a whole bunch already."
So it was quickly arranged, and an hour
latter Jonathan was on his way over to Sarah's house with a bag of extra
clothes clutched in his arms. Arriving there, he was greeted by Mrs. Jackoby
who sat them both down in her kitchen for a full explanation of the day’s
event. Jonathan was a bit reluctant to talk, having come from a world where
there was a code of silence among children towards adults, but Sarah had no
such qualms. She viewed adults, particularly her mom as friends and allies, not
the enemy, and elaborated for her mother in detail what had happened. Her
mothers expression was very serious, and after the conversation ended, she
called both the principal and the police. "I think that its time that
something was done about Joe Kelly, and soon. He won't be in school tomorrow or
for a long while either - if ever - I'm going to see to that. What do you two
plan to do this afternoon? Why don't you head out into the yard and practice up
for little league."
Sarah was an excellent baseball player,
having starred in Pony and Minor League, and she had to hold back a bit as
Jonathan seemed to fumble the ball quite a bit. After a while she grew tired of
the game and suggested that they go inside and play in her room. On their way
up the stairs they heard her mother call out: "If you're going to play
inside, Jonathan will have to stay off the furniture in case he wets."
Jonathan reddened visibly: "Lets go
back outside." Sarah, however, had other ideas, and he reluctantly
followed her into her room. Fortunately, there was only a throw rug on the
floor and they pushed that aside and got out Sarah's incredible collection of
Leggo. Jonathan liked Leggo, but had never had a set of his own, and became
easily absorbed in fitting the pieces together. He worked away for a while and
produced a remarkable Leggo dragon for a fascinated Sarah, who had abandoned
her own project to watch. "That's really neat! I've never seen that one
before; did you learn how to make that from someone elses set? I've never seen
a dragon leggo before."
Jonathan was surprised at her enthusiasm.
He liked what he had made, but didn't think it out of the ordinary. "Nah!
I just made it up. I like to do that, don't you make up things like this."
"Sure, but I've never made anything
that good before. Oh - by the way, don't you think you better get mom to help
you change?"
Jonathan looked down in surprise. He was
sitting in a puddle. He'd been concentrating so hard, he'd just plain forgot to
go to the bathroom. A look of deep shame came over him and he stuttered out
that he was sorry.
"Stop that Jonathan. We both know
you can't help it, and if you're going to always be apologizing and feeling
rotten, I'm not going to want to play with you. Besides, you don't have to wet
everything all the time anyway. Why don't you do something to protect yourself?
It would sure make life a lot easier for everyone."
"I don't think I'd have very many
friends if I wore diapers and baby pants all the time. There aren't very many
kids who want to be seen playing with a baby."
"Well, there may not be, but I'll
bet there are more who'll play with a kid in diapers, than will play with a boy
who is always soaking wet. How can you wrestle with other boys, and do all the
things guys are supposed to do if you wet yourself every time you get excited or
concentrate on something and forget to go to the bathroom? Hey, if you were
wearing diapers right now, I wouldn't have a puddle to clean up on my floor and
my mother wouldn't have to change you, and you wouldn't always have to haul
around a sack of wet clothes. The least you could do is wear some plastic pants
over those trainers my mother says you wear all the time - oops!" She
clapped her hand over her mouth and looked guiltily at Jonathan. "I wasn’t
supposed to let you know that mother had told me that."
"Jonathan stared at her angrily -
she isn’t supposed to tell anyone!"
"What do you expect - we live
together, and she and dad were talking about you at the dinner table. She talks
about her work at home just like anyone else. She'd be really mad at me if she
knew I'd blabbed. You won't tell will you? She thought it was kinda mean what
they did to you, regardless of how you'd behaved. She said she was going to try
and be nice to you, just because of it. Dad wanted to know all about how you
were treated and she told him about your trainers - she thinks that its stupid,
that you should wear diapers like any kid that wets his pants. She said that
the trainers look good, but without plastic pants, they're really pretty
useless. I'm really curious though, I think they sound kinda cute - I'd like to
see what they look like - mom says they look just like the ones little boy
toddlers wear."
Jonathan was very reluctant about this
suggestion. "Oh they're all wet and smelly now, you wouldn't really want
to see them."
"That doesn't bother me, Mom says
people make too much out of this sort of thing; urine is just salt and water,
it’s just the way your body cleans itself. You get it on your hands - you wash
them. Every mother does when she takes care of her babies, and it really isn't
any different for boys and adults too. She's changed lots of diapers, including
kids older than you."
"Not at school."
"Sure, as long as I've already
blabbed, I might as well fill you in. You don't think you're the only boy in
diapers at Washington elementary - theres 900 kids in the school, and there are
a lot kids who still wet their pants cause they haven't grown out of it. There
are a whole bunch of first graders who still wear them, and there are always a
few in second grade every year. I know cause taking care of their diapers is
one of mother's jobs. She has a regular group of kids troop in just before the
end of recess each day.
"I'll bet there aren't any other ten
year olds."
"Not always, but Mom has a couple of
older kids every year who are handicapped and need them. You've seen that kid
in sixth grade that uses the special wheel chair, and there's another fourth
grader who wears leg braces. Mom says they're real good sports too. Hey - at
least you don't have to use crutches or anything. Both of them are pretty neat
guys, everybody likes them, and they have lots of friends."
"No kidding!" it made him feel
better to know he wasn't the only one in this predicament. He was glad Sarah
had blabbed, and it was a relief that he didn't have to explain everything, or
hide anything either. She knew all about him and she still wanted him for a
friend. That was neat - he really liked it, and she was a lot of fun too.
"Hey now that I've filled you in why
don't you let me see your trainers, I really want to see what they look like. I
won't tell anyone. Besides, its only fair - you made a puddle on my floor and
I'm going to have to clean it up."
"Oh OK,” Jonathan said very
reluctantly, and glanced over at the door. Sarah ran over and shut it softly.
He looked at her and she stood there waiting expectantly, a look of keen
interest on her young face. He reached down and undid his belt buckle,
unbuttoned the front of his pants and pulled down the zipper. He could see
Sarah lean forward as he slowly slid his pants part way down, then he pulled
them back up.
"Hey! that's not fair, you said
you'd really show them to me. You gotta take your pants off!"
Jonathan sighed, took his shoes off, and
stripped off his pants, and when Sarah pointed out that his shirt hung down
over the trainers he took it off too, and stood there naked except for the
trainers in front of her. Remembering Tommy's little performance, he decided he
might as well put a brave face on the situation so he spun slowly around, pushing
his hips out a little and struck a pose. "Goo-goo!" he said, and put
on a silly smile for her.
Sarah looked at the Jonathan with
appreciation. The trainers were soaking wet and stuck to his skin. They were
cut just like boy's underwear with a fly and everything, but you could see that
they were a lot thicker. She reached over and pulled back the waist band on the
side a little bit.
"Hey!" said Jonathan nervously.
"I just want to see how they're made
silly, I'm not going to pull your pants off. Its neat the way your mother lined
them with terry cloth - I bet they'd work pretty good if you wore plastic pants
with them - at least for light wetting. Mother says you really flood your pants
though, but at least they'd work a lot better. You know they remind me of the stay-dry panties my mother had me wear
until I stopped wetting during the day in school."
"You used to wet your pants in
school too!"
"Sure, right through to the end of
first grade. Nobody really knew cause we didn't have gym class, and mother always
changed me at lunch." She laughed, "Maybe that's why I'm so
interested in your underwear." She really liked the way he looked. The wet
trainers outlined his cute fanny beautifully on his trim little body, and he
was a well-built boy. She really liked his smile. He shivered and bent over and
picked up his shirt, which he pulled on. Just then they heard a click, the door
swung open and there was Mrs. Jackoby.
"What are you two up to she said
looking at them sternly."
"Hi mom, we were playing Leggo and Jonathan
wet his pants so I made him take them off. I told him he had to wipe up the
puddle off my floor with them. Besides I thought he would be more comfortable
without his wet pants on - he's still got his trainers on." Both children
looked at her with guilty expressions.
Mrs. Jackoby could see from the evidence
that her daughter’s explanation was at least half correct. She also figured
that Jonathan was very unlikely to have initiated this little strip tease - and
she'd noted at the dinner table the other night that Sarah had had a rather
keen interest in the subject of her classmate’s underwear. "Sarah, I think
that you are getting a little old to be playing doctor." She gave her
daughter an its alright this time, but
you'd better not do it again look. "Come on Jonathan lets get you
fixed up with some dry pants, your parents will be here any minute now.
That night at dinner, the conversation
had been all about Jonathan Allen. Mr. Jackoby was extremely angry about the
incident at school, and was much impressed by his daughters accounting of
Jonathan's actions. After their daughter went to bed, his wife told him about
the incident in the bedroom. "Poor Jonathan, he looked really sheepish
when I came in. Only our daughter could have talked him into taking his pants
off. I'm not surprised though, from the way she was so fascinated about his
wetting problem at dinner the other day. I think our daughter sees Jonathan as
her first nursing opportunity and boyfriend wrapped up into one. She likes him
because he's strong and can protect her and because his special problem means
that she can mother him at the same time. I don't think she'd go for a boy she
could dominate too easily, but I know she likes to think she’s in control a
good deal of the time."
Mr. Jackoby laughed too, "I agree!
Poor Jonathan, he's not going to know what hit him. But you better keep the lid
on Sarah's interest in advanced doctor games."
"You know dear, there's a lot more
to Jonathan than meets the eye. I've read his entire file, and he frightened me
at first, but I've got to admit, since they operated on him he's been like a
new boy. It probably has a lot to do with the Curley's, but he's had a radical
change in his behavior. I have the feeling that he needs an enormous amount of
reassurance, and that it will be some time before he copes with or sees the
world like a normal little boy, but now that they have his aggressive behavior
under control, it seems as though we can deal with the root underlying
emotional traumas much more easily. Originally, looking at his file, you
wouldn't have thought there was any chance at all in his growing up to be a
happy productive individual. But what they have done has left him in a position
of having to rely on others, and through that he's relearning trust. I do hope
that they can do something to help him succeed in school or in sports, as it is
clear that the next step will be to build his sense of self-esteem. Mrs Hanlin
wants to put him back to third grade. I think that would be devastating to him
right now, the whole treatment he's received has been one blow after another to
what little ego he has. You know, he did something interesting today: he made a
model dragon with Sarah's Leggos that is incredible. I've never seen a kid do
anything that creative with them before. Sarah's put it up on her shelf to keep
she likes it so much. I think that kid may not be as dumb as his records
suggest."
The conference at Jonathan's school had
not gone as well as they'd hoped. At least they had convinced the vice-principal
and Jonathan's teacher not to put him back another grade. Kate had forcefully
made the point that with only six weeks left in the school year, it would have
little positive effect, and could create an incredibly disruptive situation.
Jonathan's behavior, though moody and uncooperative at school, was at least
not, other than his wetting, interfering with the functioning of the class.
They pointed out that there would only be a minimal difference at best between
moving him back a grade this late in the year and simply holding him back next
year academically, but that there would be a giant difference in the effect it
would have on his self-esteem. It would also leave open the possibility of his
moving on with his class should his academic performance improve.
Mrs. Hanlin was not sanguine about his
chances. "I think that Jonathan has basic skills problems. He seems to
have great trouble reading, and he appears to guess at most of the words when
called on to read in class. His writing is virtually illegible and knowledge of
mathematical principles seems entirely lacking short of simple addition and
subtraction. He should be given an IQ test as soon as possible, as it is
entirely likely that he needs to be in a special
needs class.
Kate was surprised at this last
suggestion: "You know, I taught school for a while, and I worked with
special needs children. I know one when I see one, and if anything, I think
that Jonathan may be more intelligent than most children his age, not less. I
think we should make an effort to get him some extra help. He's made friends
with one of his classmates - Sarah Jackoby, maybe she can help him along with
his schoolwork. Most importantly though, I think that once he has fully
accepted his wetting, and is reconciled to the measures that have to be taken
to control it, and we can get him on an even emotional keel, he will be ready
to move on to other tasks. For now I think that it is best to offer him help
and encouragement, and not make a big deal out of his schoolwork. He's got more
than enough to deal with just on his emotional problems. I think we should be
delighted by his obvious progress in this area, and not concerned with a lack
of progress in other areas. We've done enough to tear him down, now we have to
help him rebuild. If he has to stay back a year - so be it, but lets at least
give him six weeks to prove whether that's really necessary."
Mr. Miller and Mrs Hanlin had agreed to
the sense of this but were concerned about the disruption his wetting in class
was creating. The Curley's said they would encourage Jonathan to deal with his
wetting problem in a more direct way - but had asked for more time to do this.
They were very concerned about how they were going to approach this problem
since a large part of the whole plan was to let Jonathan decide how and how far
he would go back to childish clothes and behavior patterns and thus accept his
need to regress a bit. They had been pleased at how fast he had adjusted to
letting them choose his clothing and dress him routinely. His accepting diapers
at night had gone very smoothly, and his developing interest in childish
clothing and role-playing was clearly being fanned by his friendship with
Tommy. But moving him to wearing diapers or plastic pants to school was a giant
step, and they preferred that he arrive at this decision himself. They could
make this solution as obvious as possible, but they were very reluctant to
force it upon him as it would interfere with the very important aspect of his
treatment that he feel that he was allowing himself to be treated as a younger
kid because he needed to be.
On the way home from the Jackobys,
Jonathan told his foster parents all about what Sarah had told him about the
other kids in school that wore diapers. "So I'm not the biggest, or at
least the only baby there - when it comes to wetting," he added quickly.
Jonathan's keen interest in these kids was a good sign, both the Curley's
thought. He continued to talk about Sarah and her mother all the way home. Both
foster parents were greatly relieved that the budding friendship had clearly
cemented itself.
"You ought to invite her over to
play, Jonathan, it sounds like you're getting to be good friends," Mr.
Curley interjected.
"Yeh! And she says she doesn't mind
my wetting or anything. Her mother told her all about me, even my trainers. I
was real mad at first, but when I thought about it, it was kinda neat that she
knows all about me and she's still willing to have me for a friend."
"It may not have occurred to you
Jonathan, but you are a pretty likeable young man when you behave yourself. Now
that you're not bullying anyone, or trying to shake them down - yes we know all
about your former little racket - no one at school has any real reason not to
like you. We're not surprised at all that a smart girl like Sarah Jackoby has
taken a shine to you."
"Yeh. She's the smartest kid in
class. She doesn't even have to try and she gets great grades. Some kids have
all the luck. I could never get good grades - I wish I was smart."
"Why Jonathan, what a silly thing
for you to say, of course your smart - you just need to try harder."
For some reason, Kate's last statement
was like a trigger to Jonathan. He went hysterical. "You guys just don't know. I'm stupid! I can't
do anything! I'll never do anything! I'll always be stupid. . I've quit trying
and I'm not going to! It doesn't do anygood. I try hard and they all laugh at
me! I don't Care! I don't care! You can't make me care!" He was
sobbing hysterically as they pulled into the driveway. Curley carried him up to
his bedroom telling him gently that that wasn't true; he was a smart little
boy, that he could do anything if he tried hard enough. And that no one would
laugh at him for trying. Curley was wrong.
After an hour Kate went up and sat on the
bed with the boy. "If you're through we'd like you to come down and have
some dinner with us." She patted him gently on his back as he lay there
silently on his stomach. He heaved a sigh and rolled over and let her hug him.
"You guys are still wrong." He said. There was no further response to
her quiet denial, so Kate let it drop. "Would you like to get diapered up
before dinner?" He nodded his little head, and she had him stretch out on
the bed while she pulled his pants off, which were soaking wet after his
outburst. When he was diapered, she brought out the zippered sleepers.
"Don't you think these would be nice on a chilly night like tonight?"
He again nodded and she had him stand up and step into them. She zipped up the
front, and stood back thinking how cute he was in those sleepers, just like a
toddler. She smiled and held out her hand and they went down the stairs
together to dinner.
School the rest of the week passed much
as the previous week, with the exception that Jonathan was now sitting in the front
row. He did try harder, Mrs Hanlin could see that. He obviously paid more
attention, and he did better in the oral spelling quizzes, but in written work,
his handwriting and answers remained illegible. He was careful about his
wetting, but couldn't avoid the accidents that often followed being called on
in class for answers he didn't have - Mrs. Hanlin was trying to be careful, but
didn't want to never call on him. Gym class remained a major source of
continuing humiliation. Each day he got more tired of the accidents. By
Thursday night, he felt desperate.
His foster parents had treated him to a
trip to McDonalds. While waiting in line, another boy had pushed him, claiming,
unfairly that he'd cut. Jonathan had started to respond angrily and had wet his
pants. The other boy had laughed at him and everyone in the restaurant had seen
him standing there in a puddle. Kate had taken him out to the car while Curley
had stayed and gotten their order to take out. On the way home Jonathan had sat
and cried quietly in the back seat. "I'm so sick of wetting all the time.
Can't you make it stop? I don't want to wet anymore. I'll be good I promise.
Please!" It wasn't an angry tone just a sad one, and both the Curley's sat
there feeling guilty, knowing that they were in part, responsible for
Jonathan's condition. They both knew, however, that miserable as he was about
his wetting, that he was now, in sum, a much happier boy than he'd been in a
long time. They both hoped with all their hearts that it all worked out well.
They both were determined to never give up on the little boy they'd come to
love so quickly.
At home, they sat around the kitchen
table discussing Jonathan's problem and eating big Mac's, and chocolate cake.
It was pointed out that, short of growing older, there was no cure for his
wetting. "You know Jonathan, if it weren't for your wetting you wouldn't
be here. The fact is if we hadn't been willing to take you in, it's unlikely
that the State would have given you this treatment. So in part it’s our fault."
Curley looked at Jonathan a bit remorsefully, "Having had you for almost a
month now, we have really come to love you, and we at least would be sorry if
we hadn't had the opportunity to have you as our little bedwetter."
Jonathan digested this revelation for a
few minutes then looked at them both and said, "I've never had anyone to
love me before. I guess if I had to choose between being dry, and being with
you. Being wets better. It still isn't much fun to be wet all the time though.
You know, Sarah thinks I should wear diapers and plastic pants to school. So
does her mother. Maybe I ought to wear plastic pants over my trainers. That way
I wouldn't wet all over the place. I suppose that it would be really a lot
nicer to have dry pants all the time. I wouldn't always have to get changed
right away, and I wouldn't get embarrassed so much. Besides there are some
other kids my age who have to wear diapers to school anyway."
"That sounds like a pretty good
idea, Jonathan, and we ought to try it. Why does Sarah think you need diapers
instead of training pants?" Kate answered.
"Her mother told her I was a real
heavy wetter and that my training pants wouldn't really work that well even
with plastic pants."
"Hmm - then why not wear diapers
instead?"
"If I wore diapers, everyone would
know I was a baby."
"Why would they think that, and what
would be so awful if they did anyway?" Kate interjected, seeing where
Curley was leading Jonathan, and deciding to give him a little backup.
"You know why! Only babies wet their
pants all the time."
"Well you do wet your pants all the
time - don't you."
"I know," he said glumly, and
hung his head, "I guess I am a real baby."
"There's nothing wrong with that
Jonathan," Curley said, "a kid who knows he's a baby is a lot better
off than one who doesn't when he really is. We all are babies in one way or the
other; some of us have a hard time controlling our tempers, some people steal
from others because they don't care what other people think or feel - that’s
real baby behavior, others just want to lie around and not do anything. The
point is its important to know just where you're still a baby and accept it.
Then you can allow yourself to get the help you need and really grow up. You
know you really enjoyed playing at being a toddler boy with Tommy yesterday -
didn't you?"
Jonathan blushed a bit and said
sheepishly: "Yeh."
"Why do you think that was?"
"I'm not sure, but Tommy said his
counselor told him that it was because he needed to be a little boy some of the
time because his mother tried to make him grow up too fast."
"Do you think that could be true for
you too?"
"But I don't have a mother like
Tommy - a real one that is."
"Tommy's mother treated him pretty
bad you know - bad enough that he was taken away for a whole year and lived
with us. Not as badly as your mother treated you, but it was similar in some
ways. Your mother was mentally ill. Unfortunately she didn't recover enough to
come back to you. The result was pretty much the same - you didn't get to be a
baby very long, and all that time that you normally would have had a lot of
help learning to grow up, you didn't get any. Don't you think that maybe being
a little boy some of the time wouldn't be a bad thing for you too?"
"I guess so, but what if I want to be
a big boy?"
"Jonathan - you are a baby in many
ways, but believe me, you are a very big boy. Only a big boy would risk getting
hurt to help someone else like you did for Sarah. That was really brave of you
and everyone thinks so. Which would you rather be, a kid who people think is a
terrific person even if he does wear diapers, or a kid who doesn't wear diapers
and no one thinks much of cause he never helps anyone else."
"How about a kid who doesn't wear
diapers and who people think is terrific?" Jonathan grinned.
Curley reached over and ruffled his hair,
"I don't think that's one of your options, what do you think?"
"The problem is everyone will laugh
at me!"
"So laugh with them. The only reason
people tease others is to get a reaction. What most people want is a negative
reaction, your losing your temper or feeling bad about yourself. If you don't
give them that satisfaction, they soon give up. Better if you laugh with them,
the positive reaction makes them look bad if they persist, and everyone thinks
that you are a good sport. People like people like that. If they tell you
you’re a baby - fine laugh and say that’s right! What are they going to say
next? Once its out of the way, most people will move on to finding out what
else there is to you. Give it a try - wearing diapers is really no worse than
wetting your pants all the time anyway."
"What about gym class? We have to
change and they'll all see me without any pants."
"The other thing that draws peoples
attention Jonathan, is curiosity. Letting them see your diapers out in the open
will satisfy that - if you ran around in nothing but diapers for a week,
everyone would take them for granted. Keep them carefully covered all the time
and half the kids in school would be trying to get a peek at them. I can
guarantee you that within a week a bunch of kids would organize a pantsing
party for you anyway. So do it yourself. Volunteer to satisfy their curiosity
yourself. You'll be surprised at the reaction, and the whole issue will be out
of the way."
Friday morning Jonathan's foster parents
dropped him in front of the school. He was wearing diapers and plastic pants
under a pair of fleece sweat pants and a sweatshirt. He had a diaper bag with
three extra changes in it to give to the school nurse. His heart was pounding
furiously. Exactly what he should wear, how thick the diapers should be, should
he try to make them inconspicuous under his clothing, should they be really
obvious - all that had been discussed backwards and forwards. In the end it was
decided that the diapers should be thick enough to handle his wetting for the
morning and afternoon class periods, with only a change at lunchtime and one
just before gym class, because that's what he needed, and that they shouldn't
try to hide them or try to make them overly conspicuous. People would find out
anyway, though he shouldn't go out of his way to make it obvious that he was
wearing them, people would think that strange, he should adopt the attitude
that he didn't have anything to hide either. Thus, the fact that he was wearing
diapers under the sweat pants was reasonably clear to anyone who bothered to
look, but not obtrusively so.
At the moment, however, he felt like he
were standing stark naked in an auditorium filled with screaming girls as the kids
streamed by him. Sarah came running up; "Come on we'll be late for
class." She stopped and looked down at his crotch. "Well! It’s about
time. Good for you. Lets go."
No one else noticed his diapers as they
headed to the classroom; all the kids and teachers were in far too much of a
hurry. When he arrived, however, most of the kids were already seated and
looked up at him as he entered the room. Mrs. Hanlin heard the sudden
whispering and giggles and looked up to see the children nudging each other and
pointing at Jonathan.
"Well Jonathan," she said in a
firm voice. The room fell quiet at once, everyone waiting to hear her comment.
"I'm glad to see that you've decided to deal with your problem in a
sensible manner. You are to be congratulated. I know that wearing diapers to
school is really tough on a big boy like you. I wonder how many of the rest of
the kids in this class would be brave enough to do it if they had to. But I
think that everyone knows from the way you handled Joe Kelly that there isn't a
braver kid in this school. For those of you children who don't know it, Joe
Kelly was expelled from school yesterday and is being held at the Juvenile
Detention Center. He and two cronies tried to attack Sarah Jackoby several
weeks ago - with a knife. Jonathan here single handedly stopped them and took
the knife away. I think we all owe him a big thank you."
Half the kids in the class had been
bullied by Joe Kelly or lost their lunch money to him at one time or another.
There was no more laughter directed at him that day in the room, and a lot of
the kids came up to him and thanked later at recess. Nonetheless he was more
than aware that he was the object of intense scrutiny. It was clear that his
classmates were all fascinated by an otherwise normal boy who had to wear
diapers. From time to time he could hear whispers behind him. At one point he
heard giggling behind him, and reaching in back he realized that the sweatshirt
had ridden up the back of the chair exposing the top of his plastic pants and
diapers. He pulled his shirt down, and resisted the urge to sink into the
earth.
Mrs. Hanlin left him alone for the rest
of the day, and he had a great deal of time to mull over what she had said to
the whole class. Not just the part about taking care of Joe Kelly either. It
made him feel really good. He was in a pretty good mood therefore by the time
he stopped by for a diaper change at Mrs. Jackoby's office.
"Goodness!" She exclaimed when
he came through the door, diaper bag over his shoulders, "I see that I
have one more boy to diaper. Terry Smith will be terribly pleased to have some
company his own age at this session." She motioned over to the corner of
the room where three boys, two obviously only about 6 and one older boy were
seated. All, when he took the time to look, were diapered as well. The older
boy had a pair of crutches leaning against the wall next to him.
"Hi," Terry said in a friendly voice, "Welcome to the wet set.
No secrets here anyway - aren't you the new boy that fixed Joe Kelly? Man he was
the only kid who ever tried to trip me. These crutches make a pretty good club
though," he grinned, "he never tried that again!"
As they were talking, Mrs. Jackoby went
over and picked up one of the six year olds and hoisted him onto her examining
table which had a plastic cover on it. "Well Timmy, how are you doing
today?" She efficiently unbuckled his trousers and stripped them down
exposing a pair of Gerber toddler extra-large plastic pants over his thick
diapers. She pulled the pants off and unpinned the diapers, placing them in a
small plastic bag. Next she took a wash cloth and wiped down his whole diaper
area, squirted baby magic on her hands from an economy size bottle sitting on
the examining table, and rubbed it on his fanny, crotch, tummy, and the top of
his legs. She then reached under the table and pulled out a bag marked Timmy from which she took a prefolded
flannel diaper which was pinned on the boy, who was talking non-stop all the
way through the operation. After pulling his plastic pants back up, she patted
him on his well padded rear, and handed him his pants: "you're old enough
to put your own pants on Timmy, scoot down and let someone else have their
turn."
Why do adults always do that! Jonathan
thought to himself. Every time I get changed - I get a pat on my fanny. You
know, I think they like the feel of a diapered bottom. Maybe they're a little
bit jealous! He giggled to himself.
The little boy looked up at him with a
suddenly cross expression on his small face: "What's so funny - you wear
diapers too!"
Marylin looked at Jonathan with a cross
expression on her face.
"Of course I do, silly, I'm just as
much a baby as you are, I wasn't laughing at you; I just had a funny thought -
that's all."
"Sure you did!" the little
fellow said starting to pout.
"No seriously. OK. Did you ever
notice that every time you get your diapers changed, whoever does it gives you
a pat on the bottom?"
"Yeh?"
"How about you?" He said
turning to Terry.
"Yeh - your right - I've been
getting my diapers patted for 10 years I guess." He chuckled.
"Do you ever wonder why adults do
that? Well I figure that they like the feel of a diapered bottom. I think
they're a little bit jealous that we get to wear them and they can't!"
All 4 kids in the room turned to look up
at Mrs. Jackoby, who reddened a little bit. "OK," She laughed:
"you got us! - Actually you may be right. I think everyone is a little bit
jealous of all the love and attention babies get, and how cute they look. We
adults just don't like to put it that way. Maybe we're even a little jealous of
big kids who still get to wear diapers." She looked down at the grinning
little kid she'd just finished diapering and gave him another firm swat his
derriere: "Now I get my little bit of fun."
Timmy jumped down, and everyone laughed
together.
After Jonathan and Terry had their turn
on the table, all four boys headed off together, the younger ones eagerly
asking about how he fixed Joe Kelly. Jonathan, found that he was a little bit
embarrassed by their obvious hero worship. It certainly was a change from the
way the little kids used to think about him at his old school. Both boys wanted
Jonathan to walk with them to their lunchroom, and it slowly dawned on him that
they wanted to be seen with him in front of their friends. For both of them,
being seen with an older kid who also wore diapers, and who also just happened
to be the school hero of the hour was a big lift. So he walked with them into
their cafeteria, and let them introduce him to a couple of friends before he
and Terry Smith headed out to their own lunchroom.
"They're pretty good kids, but its a
real relief to have someone my own age in the wet set." Terry smiled.
"You know it’s hard sometimes to have to wear diapers all the time."
"Don't you ever enjoy it - even a
little. I think I do some times."
"Not very much, I've always had to
wear diapers, and always will. I'd like a lot to be like other kids. Do you
actually enjoy it?"
"Well," Jonathan said,
"Sometimes I do, I guess its because my mother used to beat me up all the
time and wouldn't give me any food. I kinda missed out on being a little kid.
Now I live with the Curley's, and they think that its OK for me to be a little
guy some of the time. I didn't always wet, but I got in a lot of trouble all
the time and the doctors decided if I wet my pants every time I tried to do
anything bad, then I'd stop. I guess they were right, but I also can't help
wetting all the time very much. They did say that I would probably grow out of
it though. Me and my friend Tommy, he wears diapers too, we sometimes play at
being little kids just for the fun of it. But I don't feel very good about it
right now, not today, not in school, and I'm really terrified about gym class
this afternoon."
"Boy that's quite a story. My
parents never beat me up, much less wouldn't give me any food. That's rough.
But you should be glad you get to go to gym class at all." Terry sighed,
"I'd be glad to run around in just my diapers in front of the entire
school - if I could."
"Oh - I'm sorry!"
"Hey man - nothing to be sorry
about, its not your fault, everyone's got problems. The worlds not fair. Its
what you do with what you've got that counts. I'm a pretty wicked arm wrestler
- what do you want to bet I can't beat you?" Terry grinned wickedly.
"You’re on!" Jonathan was
pretty proud of how strong he was for his size, and thought that he could take
the crippled kid pretty easily. The two of them found a picnic table on the
playground and seated themselves, Terry leaning his crutches against the table.
He should have known something was up when he realized that a small crowd of
kids quickly gathered around them - and they all looked like they knew
something he didn't. He and Terry counted to three. Jonathan decided to get
this over with right away; he didn't want to humiliate his new friend. He gave
a mighty heave. Nothing happened. Terry smiled at him lifting an eyebrow as if
to say "when do we start?" He heaved again, straining. Terry's arm
just stayed there, and then slowly and steadily he pushed Jonathan's arm flat
on the table without visible effort. Jonathan gasped in amazement. His arm
ached. "Man! What’s the trick?" The kids around him laughed.
"Terry's the strongest kid in the school," one little boy said. Jonathan
looked at Terry in surprise. "Hey man, like I said, its what you do with
what you have. I lift weights at home." Jonathan was impressed. He also
noticed that he'd soaked his diapers again.
After lunch recess Mrs. Hanlin started
the math lesson, which was an introductory block on fractions. It was the
class’s first introduction of the subject, and was entirely new material. Mrs.
Hanlin had always found the subject frustratingly difficult to communicate to 9
year olds. For starters, she asked if anyone in the class knew what a fraction
was. To her surprise Jonathan's hand shot up - she looked around, he was the
only kid in the room with his hand raised. "OK - Jonathan do you know what
a fraction is?"
Jonathan was so excited he stood straight
up next to his desk to answer - he knew the answer, that morning his foster
father had started to drill him on his times tables on the way to school.
Instead of a rote lesson, Curley had tried to teach him some tricks to figure
out the sums as he went along. "Six times six is 36, subtract one six and
you have 30 or five sixes. Each time you reduce it by a fraction."
Jonathan had asked him to explain what a fraction was. He repeated that answer
now: "A fraction is when you have a part of a whole. Like if I had a whole
pie and cut it into four pieces then I'd have 4 quarters. If I kept two of them
for myself, then I'd have a half a pie to eat. You show a fraction by writing
the number of pieces you have of the whole at the top and the number in the
whole on the bottom. So if I kept 2 pieces for myself out of four, I'd have two
fourths or 1/2."
Mrs. Hanlin was flabbergasted.
"That's exactly right, Jonathan, it sounds like you could teach the lesson
to the class instead of me - you certainly seem to be the expert."
Jonathan sat down beaming.
Accordingly, Jonathan was in a great mood
as he headed to gym class from his change at the nurses office. He liked the
wet diapers, but it felt better to get dry ones on. He carried a new pair of
gym shorts with him, a little larger than the old ones. He was definitely
apprehensive about what would take place in the locker room when he changed,
but was going to charge ahead.
The locker room was located beneath the
gym. The entire fourth grade had PT together, about 150 kids in all, and the
locker room was a beehive of activity with 70-80 little boys all stripping and
changing into gym shorts, tennis shoes and T-shirts. Jonathan headed straight
for his locker across the bare concrete floor, weaving his way between the
benches and the piles of little boy clothes strewn around the room. As he moved
across the big room, he couldn't help but notice a lot of curious glances in
his direction. By the time he was standing in front of it, he could see that
most of the kids in the room had stopped talking and that there was a lot of
whispering, nudging and pointing in his direction. He swallowed hard. He could
feel his heart thumping away. He looked around. Several times he heard the
whispered word "diapers!" He shrugged, smiled sheepishly, and pulled
off his sweatshirt. Then, with something of a wicked glint in his eye, he
paused and waited, if this was going to be a show he might as well make the
most of it. Finally, the boy next to him said, "Hey, aren't you going to
get ready for gym?"
"Oh - sure." He sat down on the
bench and took off one tennis shoe and dropped it on the floor. Plop! He waited
some more. Finally the boy said: "C'mon we gotta get going were going to
be late." Jonathan looked at the fully dressed boy with an expression of then what're you waiting for? And
grinned at the impatient kid. He took
off his next shoe. Plop! Finally he stood up, looked the boy straight in the
eye and said: "Boy, you really want to see what I've got on don't
you?" The boy reddened, Jonathan laughed and pulled down his sweatpants
and stood there in his diapers and plastic pants in front of 75 gaping boys.
Pandemonium reigned in the locker room,
one kid said in a loud voice "Hey look at the baby!” "Goo-goo."
Jonathan shouted in his direction. "Wanta wrestle with baby?" Every
boy in the room knew that the last three kids to pick a fight with Jonathan had
had a trip to the hospital, and this kid got suddenly quiet. Jonathan gave
everyone in the room a grin, and said "So hey - you do what you gotta do.
At least nobody else here has to worry about being the biggest baby in class -
I've got that position all to myself." A number of the kids laughed with
him.
"Hey!
Everybody out, you're late. What's going on here. Hubba hubba!". It
was Mr Connor the head gym teacher. Instantly every kid in the room grabbed
whatever they didn't have on and headed for the door. Jonathan hurriedly pulled
on his gym shorts and T-shirt. As he was lacing his shoes, Mr. Connor arrived
in front of him. "Jonathan, what's taking you so long today? Oh! I see.
Well, I guess there won't be any more puddles on the gym floor from now
on." He stood there and waited for Jonathan to finish lacing up his shoes
and as Jonathan headed for the door, he gave Jonathans padded rump a firm swat.
"Go on now boy, I'm right behind you."
"Boy!", Jonathan thought to
himself, "Adults sure like to do that." Mr. Connor did not see the
appraising look that Jonathan cast is his direction as he ran across the gym
floor to join the long line of waiting kids. As he skidded into the line next to
Sarah, she smiled at him, and he returned the greeting with a somewhat sheepish
grin. He could see various heads poking out of the line of kids looking in his
direction. Glancing down at his white gym shorts he could see that the diaper
bulge was quite evident beneath the elastic waistband of his shorts. He also
realized that if he bent over, that his diapers would be clearly visible at the
leg openings to everyone. Not surprisingly he felt remarkably self-conscious.
Mr. Connor pulled 4 kids out of the line and told them to choose teams for
four-corner capture the flag. This game, a rather poorly constrained form of
anarchy, was a great favorite and the kids waited eagerly to be chosen.
Jonathan, who had quite naturally figured that he would be last to be chosen
cause nobody would want to have a diaper boy on their team, was dumbfounded to
be among the first 20 or 30 kids picked. Notoriety evidently had its
advantages. Between the diapers and Joe Kelly, every kid in school knew who he
was he guessed. He also guessed that Curley had been right, his initial
cheerful acceptance and openness about his diapers had made a good impression
on his classmates. I guess the trick is if I can accept being a diaper boy,
it’s a lot easier for them to do so as well.
Moving around trying to tag the other
children, and while sneaking across the line to try and grab another team’s
flag, Jonathan found that he couldn't help but waddle slightly as he ran, even
when he ran. This was noticeable enough to bring some laughter from the other
kids, but he laughed with them, so it didn't turn into anything serious. The
extra thickness of the diapers was definitely an encumbrance, and he resolved
that in the future he would get Mrs. Jackoby to only put a single diaper on him
for gym class, rather than the two he normally wore. Folded, this would only
give him two layers of protection, and he might leak a bit if he got to
excited, but it would be better than waddling around while trying to compete.
Like any other boy his age, he liked to win, and to perform as well or better
than the other kids. Besides, he noted wryly, it wasn't only adults who tried
to pat his diapered butt. He couldn't help but notice that the other children
seemed to coincidently tag him there far more often than other sections of his
body.
In the locker room after gym period,
Jonathan dressed while the other boys headed off to shower. While he was lacing
his sneakers, one naked little kid came up and sat next to him. "You
really wear diapers all the time." He said in a wistful tone. "Gee -
what do they feel like?" There was an excited tone in his voice.
"Actually," Jonathan replied,
"they feel kinda of warm and comfy - particularly on cold rainy
nights."
"How about when they're wet?"
"Then they feel kinda warm, wet and
comfy," he replied with a smile.
"You like them?" the boy said
in a very quiet voice.
"They
aren't so bad, sometimes they're even fun - you can sure get a lot of attention
out of your parents with them."
"W-would you mind if I-I touched
them?" the boy said, glancing around nervously to see if anyone was
watching.
"Sure go ahead." The boy stood
up and stuck out his hand very tentatively, placing it, like he was touching a
hot potato, against the side of Jonathans sweat pants. "Oh-wow!" he
sighed. Jonathan suddenly realized that the kid's little penis had a terrific
boner, and was standing straight out from his smooth naked little body. "I
gotta go," the boy suddenly said, and darted off. Just before he
disappeared towards the showers, he stopped, and with a wishful look on his
face said "Th-thanks!" turned a bright red, and fled.
Jonathan gave Sarah a Technicolor
rendition of his adult diapered fanny patting theory and she giggled
hysterically: "Truth is Jonathan, I've wanted to pat your diapered fanny
all day!" This led to her trying to do just that as they left the bus.
First Sarah chased Jonathan around the house and then Jonathan chased her. Kate
watched them highly amused both by Sarah's obvious interest in Jonathan's
diapers, and greatly cheered by Jonathan's obvious good spirits. The end result
of all the roughhousing and tickle fighting was that Sarah had to wait in the
kitchen, while Jonathan's soaked diapers, which had leaked onto the back of his
sweatpants, were changed upstairs by Kate.
At dinner that night Jonathan regaled the
family with story's of his remarkable first day in diapers at school. "Boy
- I think that kid was actually jealous." Do you think that there are a
lot of kids who would secretly like to wear diapers?"
"I'm not sure how many there are,
but some do, I had a kid on my little league team two years ago, Joey
Caruthers, and a friend of his Timmy Bryant, who I know used to do it all the
time at home. Joey had a bedwetting problem, but his friend Timmy didn't - at
least not at summer camp. I was there for a week as part of the police
departments program on delinquency and sexual abuse prevention, and I checked
with his counselor out of curiosity. I once ran into both boys at Joey's house
playing in the backyard. Joey had forgotten that I was coming to pick him up
for an extra team practice. They were having a grand time when I came round the
side of the house: They were running around in incredibly thick diapers, one
wearing shortalls and the other a onesie. They were happy as clams until they
realized I was standing there. They were the most embarrassed pair of kids I've
ever seen. It seems that they both liked, and their parents let them, wear baby
clothes. Timmy confessed that he'd liked diapers as long as he could remember, and
that he stopped wearing them for only about a year just after he was six. Joey
said that he had to wear them anyway for his bedwetting, and that he guessed
that he'd just learned to like them. I told the boys that it was OK, that I
thought they both looked pretty cute in their outfits, and that I wouldn't tell
a soul. Joey was pretty sheepish every time I'd look at him cross-eyed during
baseball practice for a long time after that. Every year I give each kid that
graduates from my team a special present. Joey got an extra package from me
just to open at home, it had a T-shirt in it with Champion Little Slugger
printed on it and a picture of a toddler in enormous diapers holding a baseball
bat emblazoned on the front. Somewhere I also found a pair of baseball motif
diaper pins to go with it. I got a real cute thank you note from him, and he
has kept in touch from time to time over the last two years. Maybe you'll get
to meet him sometime. As far as I know both those kids still like to play in
diapers and baby clothes, and they're at least 13 or 14 now. I also know that a
lot of adults like to wear baby diapers and clothes too. There's a club for
adult babies in California that advertises in men’s magazines from time to time
that has close to a thousand members."
"You know I thought I was crazy for
a while, but maybe it’s not so unusual for a kid to like diapers after all.
Besides," and giving his foster parents a wicked little grin, "I've
got a great new theory - you know the way you guys always pat my fanny after
you diaper me. Well, you always do it to Tommy too. Not only that, Mrs. Jackoby
did it to every kid she diapered in school today - I watched, and Mr. Connor my
gym teacher did too. I kinda figure that all you guys like the feel of kids’
diapered fannies and maybe you are a little bit jealous when we get to wear
them."
"And how many people have you told
this little theory too." Curley said amused.
"I told it to Sarah's mom, and she
said it was at least partly true!, and when I told it to Sarah, she said she'd
wanted to pat my diapered butt all day too - and chased me round the house to
do it."
"Jonathan, I can't speak for every
adult in the world, but your theory holds more than a little water. I'm sure
you realize by now that both Kate and I like to see kids in diapers and we like
diapering them. In part, it's because we miss little Billy, but the truth is I
know from personal experience of at least one kid who tried on a diaper or two
when he was growing up - me. I haven't done it since I got married - we always
seem to have a few diapered kids around, and I think I get more fun out of
taking care of them. But once in a while - yeah - I'm a little jealous."
Saturday morning, Tommy arrived to spend
the night. The two boys immediately headed up to Jonathan's room to exchange
notes. Jonathan filled him in on all that had happened the day before, and the
two boys had a fine time giggling over Jonathan's adult diapered fanny patting
theory. They discussed the incident with the other boy in the locker room at
great length. "Boy! I would have loved to watch that kid when he touched
your diapers. It really turned him on didn't it. Wanta bet he plays baby at
home? He probably uses bath towels before his bath and then wipes up the floor
with them afterwards to hide that he wet them before stuffing them in the
laundry hamper."
"I'll bet a bath towel would feel
pretty much like a diaper, but it wouldn't be as much fun as having real
plastic baby pants on." Jonathan replied.
"He could use that plastic that the laundry
comes in from the dry cleaners, or he could cut holes in the corners of white
garbage bags - they'd kinda work for plastic pants." Tommy said
enthusiastically.
Jonathan began to have a sneaking
suspicion about Tommy, "Sounds to me like maybe you tried that once."
Tommy blushed a little, "Yeh - I did
before I came to live with the Curleys. Mrs. Curley told me that I didn't
really have to wear diapers if I didn't want to but that they'd really make me
more comfortable. I said Oh - OK, like it was maybe the worst thing in the
world. Truth was the first night I was so excited I couldn't sleep. Real baby
pants and diapers with real baby diaper pins. I loved it!"
"You mean you always wanted to wear
diapers and baby pants? Do you wet your bed on purpose?"
"No, actually I was pretty unhappy
about it when it started happening, and mom got real angry with me. She scared
me sometimes. I guess that's why I had to go away for a while; she and I were
always fighting about it. Now it’s real different, there isn't all that extra
laundry, and she seems to really like diapering me and babying me when I want
it. I was a little shy at first; I mean how does a guy tell his mother that he
wants to wear baby clothes. Now she makes em for me when she has time. She
shows me the Sears catalogue or one of those kids fashion magazines with
clothes for toddlers in it, and I point out what I like. If she likes it too,
then she sews them up for me."
"You got other baby clothes than
those sleepers Mrs. Curley made you." Jonathan was surprised and realized
that he was a bit excited. He wanted to see them.
"Yeh - I even brought some with me,
wanna see em?"
"I guess so." Tommy ran over
and opened his suitcase. He reached in and pulled out his sleepers, and then
moved a huge pile of diapers onto the bed. There were three or four neatly
folded pieces of clothing beneath. He pulled out the first one and held it up.
It was an exact copy of a little kid’s onesie, complete with snaps at the
crotch. "Oh - wow!" Jonathan breathed. Tommy chuckled, "Now you
sound like that little kid at the gym!" Jonathan giggled, "Yeh! I
guess I'd like to see you wear that too."
"Really. You really would?"
OK." Before Jonathan could stop him he'd run down the stairs to fetch
Kate. She came up the stairs, holding an eager Tommy by the hand and brought
him into Jonathan's room. "I suppose I'd better get you in diapers first,
that onesie wouldn't look very authentic otherwise." Kate looked over at
Jonathan, and was pleased to see that though clearly a little shy about her
knowing that he'd wanted to see Tommy in his onesie, he was obviously very
interested. She hoisted Tommy up on the changing table, and quickly stripped
him of his pants and shirt, oiled him and pinned him up into three bulky
diapers followed by plastic pants. She had him sit up while she pulled onesie
down over his head and then lay back and lift up his fanny and spread his legs
apart. Reaching under, as Jonathan carefully watched, she pulled the front and
back bibs together and did up the snaps between as Tommy's spread his legs
apart. Tommy was smiling happily and giggling as she hefted him up and set him
on the floor.
Tommy looked at Jonathan, "Goo-goo
me little boy. You like my baby onesie?" Jonathan looked him over; the
onesie was made out of a Healthtex fabric with little penguins all over it. It
really looked cute. The way it showed off the diapers bulging on Tommy's
bottom, with his bare legs poking out from the neatly covered plastic pants
made him look just like a little toddler boy. "Yeah - it is really neat.
You look just like a little kid."
It was apparent to both Kate and to Tommy
that he was dying to try the onesie on himself. "I have another one in my
suitcase just like this one, but with teddy bears on it." Tommy looked at
Jonathan, who blushed a bright red. Kate looked down at him, "Welll?"
He blushed even more furiously, but gave a barely perceptible little nod. She
smiled and picked him up and placed him on the changing table too, while Tommy
ran over and got the other onesie out of the suitcase. He ran back and stood
next to Kate watching eagerly while she worked on Jonathan. "I guess that
you’re probably ready for a change anyway," she said stripping off his
clothes. She reached under the leg band and felt his diapers. "I guess you
could go a little bit longer before a change?" Jonathan looked
disappointed. "Oh - all right, I guess you're wet enough." and she
pulled the plastic pants down his legs, leaving them on his ankles. "The
nice thing about a onesie is how easy it makes a diaper change." She then
unpinned his damp diapers and put them in the plastic sack that hung at the
side of the changing table. As she washed and oiled him, she couldn't help but
admire his smooth creamy skin and how pretty his naked little crotch and fanny
looked. She liked to imagine it all covered with diapers and what it must feel
like as he wet them. She was sure that he enjoyed it now - (just like Curley
did, when she wasn't around - she'd noticed the extra diapers in the hamper
from time to time, but had kept mum, not wanting to hurt the pride of the big
Irish cop). She smiled down at Jonathan, and he smiled back as she rubbed the
oil in between his legs and around his cute little fanny. Then she placed three
diapers under his rear, and pulled them up between his legs. She noted that now
he always gave a quiet little sigh, and that his body seemed to relax when she
did this. Jonathan was coming to depend on his diapers, and clearly felt
uncomfortable without them. She pinned him up tightly and slid the plastic
pants back up his legs. Sitting him up she took the second onesie from Tommy
and pulled it down over his head. He immediately lay back, spread his legs and
lifted his fanny up slightly as she pulled the two bibs together between his
legs. Jonathan felt a small wave of pleasure spread through his body as she did
the snaps up. Picking him up, she set him down next to Tommy, "My but I
don't remember when I've seen two prettier little boys," she exclaimed.
Jonathan blushed madly, while Tommy giggled some more. "You two can go
play now, but stay in the yard, or in the house. Lunch will be ready in a
while.
Jonathan had thought only to try the
onesie on; that he was now clearly expected to spend the rest of the day in it
discomfited him more than a little. It was one thing wearing diapers under your
shorts, entirely another parading around in baby clothes like a toddler. “What
if somebody sees me?" he said plaintively.”
"Whose gonna see us besides your
foster parents, and they already know about it. Besides its fun to dress this
way, and you'll really like it, onesies are really comfortable and its a lot
easier to get your diapers changed!" Tommy's enthusiasm overwhelmed
Jonathan's weak objections, so he agreed to wear it for a while - at least.
Jonathan waddled a little bit from the
thick diapers. He toddled over to Tommy's suitcase and looked at the other
clothes. "Hey! These are real baby stuff." He held up a blue diaper
cover with little lambs running all over it. It was plastic lined with elastic
at the waist and leg holes. Next to it was a pair of shortalls made of light
brown corduroy with button tabs at the sides above the waist. He held them up.
"Those are my favorites!" Tommy
exclaimed. They look really cute, and I can get away with wearing them places.
People look at me in a funny way, but they always treat me like I'm a little
kid whose big for his age. I always pretend I'm six, and mom goes along with
it. She explains that I need the diapers because rapid growth creates special
physical problems for young boys." Both Tommy and Jonathan were a bit
small for ten year olds, and could probably have passed for large seven year olds if dressed with care. But six was
stretching it. Jonathan wondered how many people were really fooled, and what
they actually thought of the diapered boy.
Uncomfortable with the idea of running
around the backyard where a neighbor or passerby might possibly see them,
Jonathan elected to play upstairs that morning. As the day wore on, Jonathan
had to admit that the onesie really was both as comfortable and as practical as
advertised. Tommy never tired of pointing out how well it displayed his
diapers, and emphasized the slight waddle they created when he walked. Most of
the morning they played with a set of blocks and some toy soldiers on the floor
of Jonathan's room and in the wide upstairs hallway. They were both
disappointed that the day had turned windy and blustery, and looked gloomily
out the hall windows from the window seat below. Shortly after noontime, his
foster mother called the pair down to lunch. As they entered the room, his
foster father looked up from his paper and smiled at the two boys. "Well,
here come two little drops of sunshine on a gloomy day. You kids having
fun?" He looked meaningfully at Jonathan in his onesie, who immediately
reddened.
"You let that boy be Curley.
Jonathan, ever since your foster father found out how red you can turn, he
takes wicked delight in kidding you just to see blush. Come sit at the table,
its such a nasty day outside, I've made you both big mugs of hot chocolate to
go with your soup and sandwich." Curley didn't look a bit remorseful, and
grinned his best Irish grin at his wife, and then said, well if I can't tease
ya, the best I can do is please ya. There's a new Disney movie at the Cinema
VI, and a day like today was made to go to matinees on. How’d you two
desperadoes like to rustle up some pants and hitch a ride with me to the
movin-pitures?"
As anticipated, the suggestion was met by
wholehearted applause. After lunch both boys were bundled upstairs where they
were changed into less bulky diapers and dressed in elastic waisted pants over
the onesies. The effect was clearly childish. Tommy was clearly excited to be
going to the movies, this way, Jonathan felt considerably more reserved about
it, but since he had to wear the diapers anyway, he might as well go along with
it. "Anyway," Tommy was explaining, "a lot of kids our age like
to think they’re too old to go to the Little
Mermaid, and mostly younger kids will be there. We probably won't see
anybody our age. Jonathan wasn't so sure, Tommy was in the fifth grade, but he
hung out with a younger set at school, and he heard a lot of the fourth grade
already talking about this movie. "Oh well," he thought, looking in
the bathroom mirror at his reflection, "they all know I wear baby diapers
anyway, and I don't look all that different from the way I'm usually dressed
for school." For some reason, he hadn't noticed the snaps up the crotch.
Arriving at the theatre, the boys and
Curley followed the stream of kids up the stairs and joined the line. A number
of the kids in the line immediately noticed the diapered duo and immediately
started pointing and whispering. There was considerable giggling. Jonathan was
relieved to see that most were younger kids, and none of them from his school.
Getting their tickets, they headed for the refreshment counter, where in the
press of kids, no one could even see their trousers, and got big giant cokes
and popcorn from one of the girls at the counter. "Cute T-shirts you have
on." she smiled at Jonathan, "you borrow them from your little
brothers?" Jonathan winced and blushed a bit, but then smiled right back.
"You don't know the half of it!" He quipped, giving Tommy the
giggles. He wondered what she'd have said if she knew that these T-shirts
snapped at the bottom. For some reason the thought gave him a little shiver of
unexpected pleasure.
The movie was terrific, and both boys
came out bubbling with excitement. "That Sebastian was incredible! Snap!
Snap! Did you see the way he cut that rope and dropped the boom on that chef
who wanted to cook him!" Tommy immediately started snap-snapping
pretending his hands were Sebastian the crab’s claws. "I'm a gonna pinch
your butt man!" The boys ran around laughing and giggling among the swarm
of kids pouring from the movie. Curley was highly amused by their good spirits.
Arriving home just before dinner he lead
the boys upstairs for a change. "I'm first! " Jonathan ran over to
the changing table and waited expectantly for his foster father to pull the
pants off. Instead he was hoisted into the air and onto the table.
"Heave-ho, me hearty and off they go. Spread your yards and we'll jibe
your sails!" Jonathan gave Curley a confused look: "You want me to
spread my legs to take my pants off?" "Just to unsnap them,” Curley
grinned at Jonathan's slack jawed look of amazement as he rapidly undid the
snaps along the legs and pulled the trousers open and up his waist and then
undid the onesie. "I swear boy! I didn't know a kid could blush down to
his toes. You didn't know these pants had a snap crotch?"
Tommy giggled. Jonathan looked at him
with an accusing glare. Tommy tried to look innocent - but failed miserably.
"You looked really cute from behind. You didn't notice because only the
kids in back of you could see that you had snaps up the legs of your trousers.
You should have seen their expressions! Jonathan looked truly mortified.
"That's not fair! I'm going to bean you!" He jumped off the table and
chased the laughing Tommy down the stairs with his open trousers hanging down
over his diapers and plastic pants. Curley couldn't help smiling at how cute
the kid looked. He could hear Tommy going ouch! ouch! at the bottom of the
stairs, and looked over the hall banister to see Jonathan straddled on top of
the squirming boy snap-snapping! him using his fingers to imitate Sebastian's
pinchers. "OK! OK! I'm sorry. I apologize! I should have told you!"
Tommy squealed, laughing and choking and coughing. Jonathan relented - a bit -
and proceeded to tickle his friend a bit. "Hey stop it I'll wet my
pants!" He giggled. A statement that made Jonathan collapse in giggles as
well. Tommy immediately leapt on him and reversed positions. Madly attacking
his friend under his arms. By the time Curley got them back upstairs, they had
soaked through their diapers, and had leaked onto their trousers and onesies.
"Next time I'm going to get you two fire hydrants, junior size
cokes!" Curley groused half seriously.
Monday morning again, School, Jonathan
groaned. Rain was beating against the window and he could hear his foster
parents getting up. Any minute now they'd be in to roll him out. He buried his
head under the covers and snuggled down into the center of the warm patch at
the center. "Maybe if I close my eyes and open them again it won't really
be Monday morning." The weekend had been fun, playing with Tommy and his
foster father. Sometimes he almost felt like he had real parents. He felt snug.
Though his diapers were wet, they were warm and reassuring, and comfy under his
sleeper. He heard footsteps in the room
"I'm not here! Go way! I'll call the SPCC for cruelty to
innocent young children!" Curley heard the disembodied voice of his foster
son issuing from the lump in the middle of the bed. "I'm not here
either!" he replied, "I'm actually sleeping in the next room. Instead
I'm a green bugged eyed kiddy whomper. Grrowwwllll!" So saying he reached
over and hugged the little form under the blankets. "And I'm a gonna wompa
alla over you!" So saying he thrust his hands under the blankets and poked
around the squirming form until he found a few ribs, which he then tickled
madly. The form erupted squealing in laughter, and the two of them rolled
around on the bed. "Don't blame me if my diapers leak all over the place -
I can't help it." Jonathan said as he lost control and flooded his diapers
anew. Curley laughed, "then we'll wrap you in diapers to your chin tonight
and put you to bed in a plastic tarp. Then I can tickle you all I want!"
he proceeded to run his hands up and down the squealing boys sides all over
again. "Up and at-em!"
"Oh-OK. I guess you chased all my
grumps away."
"And a good thing too. Grumps! I
hate getting grumps in my eggs in the morning." The boy giggled again,
getting out of bed and standing up for Curley to unzip the sleepers and take
him to the shower.
Arriving early at school, it was obvious
from the many curious looks he got that news of his diaper debut had spread
throughout the entire school over the weekend. Following Curley's advice, he
just smiled when people looked at him and pretended nothing was happening. He
was getting used to being the focus of attention, and was slowly realizing that
he had more control over what people thought of him than he'd ever realized. It
was all in how he responded. As he walked down the corridor he ran into Terry
Smith heading for his homeroom. He admired how fast Terry could move on his
crutches and hurried to catch up to him. "Hey Terry! How's it going."
Terry glanced back and saw Jonathan, turned and waited for Jonathan to catch
up. "You made quite a scene out of gym class I hear. I heard you really
put down some kid who was trying to make fun of you. That took guts to undress
in front of 70 kids wearing diapers."
Jonathan grinned, "I figured if I
told them: alright guys I'm am the
biggest baby here, it'd take the steam right out of their sails. It seemed
to work pretty well. I get a lot of odd looks, but I'm alive aren't I, and hey!
I wasn't the last kid chosen to play on a team for a change."
Terry laughed, "My dad'd say you got
moxie kid! I think that's supposed to mean real balls. Anyway you certainly
don't have anything to hide anymore." Involuntarily both boys glanced down
at the slightly visible bulges in their trousers, and then shrugged. As they
walked along Sarah came up and joined them. "Hey! Need your diapers patted
Jonathan!" All three laughed, and a number of kids turned wondering what
the inside joke was. "See ya at recess." Terry called as he swung
into his classroom."
It was a mixed week for Jonathan, he
seemed all of a sudden to have a few friends. Real friends. Strangely enough,
under the leadership of Terry, the wet set really was a kind of club. The 4
younger members, two had been absent on Friday, looked up to and got
considerable support from the older boys. Jonathan discovered that he really
liked helping the little guys out. Mikey, Timothy and Billy were in the first
grade, while Jason was in second. The older of the three felt real self
conscious, and would have felt totally without a friend if it weren't for Terry
and Jonathan. The other boy, Arnold, was in sixth grade and had to use a
special wheel chair. He really didn't consider himself to be part of the group,
as he was older and all. He was always a bit condescending to the younger kids,
and Terry made a career out of ribbing him when he had to show up for the noon
session at the nurse’s office. Jonathan was not at all loath to join in. Arnold
usually found another time to come. But the other six boys always made a point
of it to walk to the lunch room together, and stop in with the little guys for
a moment. To the younger kids both Terry and Jonathan were real heros. Terry
cause he could out arm-wrestle any kid in school, and Jonathan who had fixed Joe
Kelly. Jonathan eventually realized that he was unconsciously mimicking a lot
of what Terry did and said. I guess I'm not totally immune to a little hero
worship myself he had to admit to himself sheepishly. Terry had been kidding
him about his imitating him. They were the best of friends.
Academically, on the other hand, school
was a very mixed bag. He was struggling. It had been a long time since he'd
actually tried, but now he wanted to please his foster parents, and he had to
admit his friends, Terry and Sarah, seemed to place a lot of emphasis on doing
well in school. When he'd tried his who
cares routine, they'd both given him a real dressing down and a cold
shoulder for a few days. He could do reasonably well in oral quizzes, but
invariably crashed when it came to written work and reading. How come he always
did so badly? He tried as hard as any kid. He really didn't think he was that
dumb when he was around other kids outside of class. But he guessed he must be.
Mrs. Hanlin could see that he was trying, and could see the frustration in his
eyes. In some ways it was worse now that he was trying, since by doing so he
was in effect proving that he really couldn't do it. She guessed that this was
why he had angry outbursts from time to time in class. Though she was normally
strict all the time, she gave him a bit more leeway than usual, reasoning that
after the terrible humiliation she'd given him in class, she owed him a little.
Besides there were only about 3 more weeks in the school term.
In gym class, he noticed that there were
always a few boys who inadvertently just happened to be around when he was
dressing. They were friendly enough, but were real shy of being seen with him.
Once or twice he saw the boy who'd felt his diapers the first day looking at
him from a distance, and he always smiled back. The kid’s name he eventually
found out was Tobin Wheeler, who it was rumored used to wet his bed a lot. His
parents had evidently sent him off to overnight camp one year for a few weeks,
though it was supposed to be a secret, it had been common knowledge among the
boys that his cabin was for bedwetters. Jonathan kinda felt sorry for him. He
was pretty sure that the kid was fascinated by diapers, but had no one to talk
to about it. I'll bet that's real scary, he thought to himself. To grow up
feeling real weird and having no one you can share it with. He was pleased to
find that he still wasn't chosen last, even after the novelty of the diapers
had worn off a bit after a couple of weeks.
After school, Sarah usually got off the
bus with him and would play at his house until her mother came home. Sometimes
she'd stay over for dinner. Some days she would help Jonathan with his math
homework, she'd quietly given up trying to help him on reading, he just couldn't
seem to get things right and she found herself getting angry at him.
"You're so stupid!" she'd blurted out in frustration one afternoon.
Jonathan had gotten so angry it had scared her a bit, and had given her the
cold shoulder for a week. Boys could be so frustrating she thought. She really
liked Jonathan, and she had to admit to herself, she really liked seeing him in
his diapers. She was pretty careful about that. Jonathan wore them all the
time, so it was normal for her to be around at changing time. She had on
several occasions gone upstairs while he was being changed and had
"inadvertently" glanced in his bedroom as she passed by on the way to
the bathroom. She'd stay there for a while, and then flush the toilet and head
downstairs again. She kept remembering how cute he'd looked in his wet training
pants. But there was a lot more to Jonathan than that. She really liked the way
he took on the younger members of the "wet set" at school. Normally,
you'd expect any boy in his position to try and disassociate himself from
younger kids who wet their pants. He seemed to have a special sympathy for
younger kids who needed help. Sometimes she thought that he was a different
person around them than around his peers, where he maintained a strictly so what attitude except with his closest
friends, Terry, Tommy, and herself.
As the weeks passed by, it became
increasingly obvious to all, including himself that he was failing. This wasn't
like his old school at all, he thought, they kept kids back all the time here.
There was even a boy his age already in third grade. He was terrified of
staying back. It'd been bad enough to be put in fourth grade in the first
place. He thanked God he wasn't at his old school, where all the kids already
knew him.
The first of May came, a time when young
men's fancy turns to baseball - and their fathers. Tommy had spent Friday night
at the Curley’s and Sarah had showed up early Saturday morning so that they
could all go together to the tryouts. Both Jonathan and Tommy had been mortified
when she'd walked in early at breakfast. They were both still in their
sleepers. She had looked at them with great amusement, "My those are
cute!" She grinned, "You guys better run upstairs and change, I don't
think you wanna go to tryouts in those things." Sarah, like Curley, had
developed a real taste for seeing Jonathan blush. She'd never know a kid could
turn so red, and she couldn't resist teasing. He'd given her a look that'd kill
and had stomped off with Tommy up the stairs. It had added greatly to the
comical effect of the two dressed as toddlers. They couldn't quite stomp off
properly in footed sleepers and thick night diapers. She'd enjoyed the sight,
having never seen either in such thick padding before. When they'd returned,
she'd been properly remorseful, and had promised it'd be a secret. “What were
friends for anyway? Besides, they were kinda cute, and now that she knew they
wouldn't have to hide when she came over.” The two boys, chagrined, found no
alternative but to accept this, and eventually they were all talking madly
about the tryouts that morning.
Curley drove them down to the high school
gymnasium where the tryouts were being held. Each boy or girl stood at the far
end of the giant double basketball court sized gym and fielded 4 flies and 4
grounders, and then went to a batting pen where the coaches looked at their
swing. The place was a study in controlled pandemonium. Tommy had opted out of
diapers for the morning, so Jonathan was the one lone boy in the place. Most of
the other kids were far too nervous to bother much, though he did hear a few
sniggers from kids he didn't recognize. There were about 300 kids in all. Many
would go to the minor leagues to play an extra year; you had to be ten to even
try out. Most of those would get drafted the next year and the remainder, by
quiet agreement would be parceled out to the majors for their last year of
little league when they were twelve. Every 10 year old’s dream was to make it
to the majors his first year of eligibility. There were two leagues, each with
12 major league teams of 15 kids each. While minor league teams were always
named after professional baseball clubs, each major league team was named after
its sponsor, often a men’s service club or a fast food restaurant. Two were named
after funeral homes, and the boys on those teams always hated the inevitable
jokes.
Curley was the coach of Burger King in
the National League, and he waved goodbye to the kids as they entered the gym
and headed off to join the other coaches from the league. They eyed the group
from the American League who had taken up their regular spot on the opposite
side of the gym. Besides competing against each other, the best teams from each
league would have a final playoff for the championship. In addition the two
leagues competed in an all star series as well, which decided what kids and
coaches competed in the national little league world series. There were several
levels of rivalry here; most did not involve the kids.
Each year Curley had to find 7 to 8 new kids
to replace last years graduates, and the few kids who had to quit for one
reason or another. The core of the team was always the remaining regulars at
the beginning of the season. But in order to do well, particularly in the
playoffs, by which time the new kids would be fully integrated into the team,
you had to pick wisely in the draft. You needed to find the outstanding 10 year
olds with an eye to the future, since then you would have a steady player for
at least two years, when they were 11 and 12. These were always the first to
go, and a lot of coaches spent considerable time scouting the minor leagues the
previous season for likely prospects. Each team was expected to take at least 1
twelve year old, and sometimes two. Thus, it was important to try and grab the
best 10 year olds and then go for the best 11's right away. Making a bad pick
at the 10 year old level could stick your team with a real handicap, since
returning boys, once drafted, were guaranteed their positions until they
graduated after their twelfth birthday.
Jonathan went and registered with his
friends and they each got a number that was pinned to their back by a mother.
He was only wearing a single diaper, and was planning to head for the bathroom
right after and right before his turn, so it wasn't particularly obvious what
he had on. Nonetheless, the mother who pinned on the number gave his pants a
curious look, which, as always made him blush. He went over and sat on a bench
and watched the other kids catch. Some of them were pretty good. As his turn
approached he hurried off to the John, but found an interminable line. He
waited frustrated at the crowd of kids ahead of him. None of them seemed as
scared as him, and they were laughing and joking, punching each other in the
arm. A few curious glances were made in the direction of his trousers and he
heard two kids whispering nearby. He decided to leave; it was almost his turn
anyway. Coming back out into the gym, he saw Sarah make a diving catch on a
miss-hit ball that actually had a couple of coaches clapping. She made everyone
of the balls hit out to her. Tommy followed, and though he dropped a fly, and
bobbled a grounder, he did pretty well too.
"Number 148! Number 148!" It
took him a moment to realize that that was his number. He stumbled out shyly
onto the gym floor to be waved to the back of the gym by an impatient coach. He
waited expectantly, his glove poised. He heard the bat crack; the ball went up
in the lights. He didn't even see it come down. He heard laughter from the kids
along the walls as he ran around looking for the ball. In all he managed to
catch one fly on a lucky bounce, and he stopped one of the grounders only by
standing in its way and then bobbling it. He left the floor miserably, and only
when he heard a kid snigger "Look that kid even wet his pants," did
he realize the full extent of the whole miserable disaster, he hadn't even feel
himself wet, and the single diaper had not been enough as the frightened kid
had totally lost control. Not even looking at his friends he walked out to the
car and sat in it by himself for an hour.
Curley had had a bad feeling about this
from the beginning. He would have preferred keeping Jonathan out of the tryouts
altogether, having practiced with him over the last month and a half. He knew
instinctively that to do so could easily have been just as big a disaster. The
bad performance was sad, but Jonathan would take a while to get over the total
humiliation of the whole situation. Worse, the pants wetting had marked him.
Normally a coach could squeeze in a kid who played badly without it being
noticed by the other kids, since they usually were too scared themselves at the
tryouts to notice who else did badly or well. Naturally those who didn’t get
chosen would resent any kid who really hadn’t earned a place. Otherwise he
could have slipped Jonathan onto his team, and hoped for the best. After the
last kid had batted, he wasn't surprised that Jonathan didn't show up, he and
the other 23 head coaches met in the school auditorium for the draft. He had
eighth pick, it hadn't been a good year for Burger King the year before, and
managed to snag Sarah. She was an outstanding fielder and was good with a bat.
He knew that by age 12 many of the boys would have caught up with her in
stamina, but for this year she would play as well as any 11 year old and most
12'vs and give him a considerable edge. He then went for three boys who looked
like they had good pitching arms, and a boy he'd marked as a potential catcher.
The two most important positions on any little league team - catcher and
pitcher. You had to find several of the latter, and at least one of the former
to even begin to compete. He knew that this year he'd get two twelve year olds
out of the lottery, so that left him with one additional choice. He picked
Tommy.
Sarah and Tommy were waiting for him
outside the auditorium. They looked at him expectantly. "Did we make it?
Did we make it?" He nodded. "Which teams?".
"Look kids, I've got a real problem
with Jonathan, if I tell you, you will have to keep it a secret until I can
break the news to him at home."
"He did pretty bad - didn't
he," Tommy looked up at Curley, a lot of the enthusiasm-drained
momentarily from his face. "Yeah! Tommy he did," Curley replied
tousling the mop of hair on his head. "I appreciate your concern. If he
hadn't wet his pants, I could have chosen him too, but there isn't a kid there
who won't remember how bad he did in the tryouts after he wet his pants. I
could exercise a coaches prerogative and draft him as my foster son, but it
would be pretty unfair to a lot of kids, and their parents would make a real
scene." Sarah reflected on this a bit, and then caught a nuance of what
Curley had said: "You drafted both of us!" Curley smiled and nodded.
The two kids were ecstatic.
When they reached the car, to Curley's
relief Jonathan was sitting glumly in the back. They all got in, the two other
children doing their best to hide their own good feelings. All the way home not
a word was spoken.
"You drafted Tommy and you didn't
draft me!" Jonathan exploded. "Now I have to play in the minors with
all the little kids!" Curley argued with him and tried to explain.
Jonathan wasn't listening to reason. In fact, he wasn't listening at all. He
sat there rigid, tears rolling down his face with an angry defiant glare. He
ran upstairs and slammed the door.
Two weeks later, the Curleys got a call
from Mr. Miller at school. He wanted them to come in for an urgent conference.
They speculated that the reason was Jonathan's continuing weak performance in
school, and looked forward to the meeting grimly. It hadn't been a good two
weeks for Tommy. He'd been testy with his friends, and had been distant to both
Sarah and Tommy, appearing to make out that somehow it was their fault that
they and not he was in the majors. They had gotten several concerned letters
from his teacher about his lack of progress in school. They were not prepared
for what Mr. Miller had to tell them when they arrived at his office.
Mr. Miller and Curley were old acquaintances,
having worked together through the police departments cooperative volunteer
anti-drug and sex abuse programs over many years. "Curley, I am afraid I
don't have very good news for you. There have been a rash of thefts in school
lately. We've had a terrible time tracking down the culprit. Last week a boy
brought a brand new Walkman to school that he'd gotten for his birthday.
Somebody jimmied his locker and got it out within a few hours. That limited the
suspects to a pretty small group. The only kids who could have done it would
have to have been absent from class at the right time. Jonathan was on one of
his innumerable trips to the bathroom at the time. Worse, several kids saw him
with a Walkman that afternoon. Does Jonathan have a Walkman of his own?"
The Curleys exchanged worried looks and shook their heads slowly. "I'll
search his room this afternoon and get back to you."
When Jonathan got home that afternoon
from school, he and Sarah walked in the house together to be met by both his
foster parents. Jonathan was surprised to see his foster father home at this
time of day, he usually worked until six. "Hi! . . ." he started to
say.
"Sarah, something has come up, and
we need to discuss it with Jonathan in private. We'd appreciate it if you could
run home. We're sorry to have to ruin your afternoon."
Jonathan realized that both his foster
parents had very serious and troubled expressions. "Uh-oh!" he
thought to himself. His worst fears were confirmed as soon as Sarah had left,
when his foster father produced the Walkman he'd lifted from some kid's locker
the week before. He looked at them both: they were obviously going to give him
a real talking too. "So you found it. Yeh I took it. So what. He shouldn't
have brought it and shown it off around school if he didn't want some one to
take it. What's the big deal?" He adopted his best so what? attitude. Neither of the Curleys were the slightest bit
prepared for his response, while he demonstrated this attitude about schoolwork
to his classmates all the time; they had ever seen him take this attitude
before. They were stunned and appalled. Curley felt his blood pressure steam up
to a boil. Careful! He thought to himself - lets think this one through. He
looked at the defiant boy. "Jonathan, I don't steal. Anything. I think too
much of myself to do that. I guess you didn't have as high an opinion of
yourself as we did. That makes us both incredibly sad." Jonathan could see
that his foster mother was about to say something, but Curley laid his hand on
her arm before she did. "Right now I feel so badly about what you have
done, I really don't want to even see you for a while. You are to spend the
rest of the day in your room. This isn't a punishment, it’s just that the rest
of the members of this family feel pretty miserable right now and we want to be
alone. We'll discuss why you did this, and what we're going to do about this
before you go to bed. Now, head up stairs please."
Jonathan had been prepared for a lot of
shouting and yelling, or maybe even getting beaten. But the calm quiet deeply
sad tone of his foster father's voice frightened him far more, and he headed up
to his room. From his room he could hear the Curleys talking in the kitchen
together, and though his foster father raised his voice above its accustomed
tone a few times, he couldn't make out the conversation. They were real upset.
He realized after a while that he needed to be changed real bad. His plastic
pants were leaking all over his bed. He got up and looked out the doorway down
the hall. "Hey! I'm leaking, I need to be changed." To his surprise,
no one came up the stairs. "Hey!" He cried again. "Oh-well, I
don't need them anyway!" He headed over to his changing table and got out
a couple of fresh diapers and a clean pair of plastic pants. He looked around
the room for a place to lie down, but in the end decided he'd rather lie on the
clean table than the dirty floor. He pulled his pants down, and took off his
plastic pants. He had a little trouble with the pins and poked himself when one
of them sprang open. "Shit!" he exclaimed angrily. He climbed up on
the table and lay back. It felt strange up there by himself, Curley or his
foster mother had always been there before tickling and hugging him. He
realized that he'd really come to like his diaper changes. He looked around for
his diapers, and had to sit up and pick them up off the end of the table. He
opened them up, realizing that he didn't know how to fold them. They were way
too big, he realized, unless they were folded properly. He tried several
different ways but couldn't get them quite right, trying to put on his
makeshift diapers he got tangled up, they bulged wrong and hung loosely,
sliding down his legs when he tried to get off the table. He got up off the
table and lay them flat, decided to just fold them in half and then take the
top part and fold it partway back on itself. "That's what they call a
soaker, I think." He got back up on the table, lay back, and tried to pin
the makeshift diapers on himself. They seemed to be too thick at the sides for
the pins. He jammed them in anyway and promptly drove one into his thumb. He
swore again. He got up off the table. The diapers didn't feel right, and the
pins popped open again and the diapers fell to the floor. At the same time his
bladder let go and he started peeing. He'd been holding it for quite a while
and couldn't stop. The urine went all over the place; he grabbed at the diapers
and held them between his legs. "Wouldn't somebody please come and help
me!" he yelled. There was no response. "Please!" He called in a
more subdued tone.
He gradually realized that he hadn't felt
this alone since he'd left the JDC. He went over and sat on the bed. "They
don't really care about me anyway!" He sat there. Several hours passed and
no one came up the stairs. He didn't feel very good, he realized, and wondered
why.
At about 7:30 his foster parents came
back into his room. Jonathan was lying on his bed, and he looked at them
defiantly. Curley could see that his face was streaked with dried tears. He was
sitting on a half folded bunch of obviously wet diapers, naked except for his
shirt on his bed. He'd pulled off the corner of the linens and placed the
diapers on top of the plastic sheet. He looked at them, "I couldn't get
them on." Curley ignored the boy’s statement.
"First we'd like to know why'd you
do this Jonathan?" he said quietly. Both of them sat there waiting for a
response.
At first Jonathan just sat there
silently. They waited and eventually the boy blurted out: "Why should you
care anyway? You don't really love me. I'm not going to stay here forever
anyway. You probably want to get rid of me." Curley and Kate just looked
at him curiously. "Besides, I tried real hard, I really did, and they just
laughed at me!"
"Who laughed at you Jonathan - was
it about your diapers?" Kate asked in a concerned voice.
"No!!
He shrieked at the top of his lungs. "It's
because they think I'm so stupid! They all do. Everyone one does. They laugh at me all the time cause I
fail every test and cause I can't read in class. It’s not fair. I tried hard.
Why should I care about any of them?"
"Did Sarah laugh?" Kate asked.
"No - not her." He said in a
sulky voice. But everyone else did.
"'Does Terry laugh at you?, - or
Tommy, or Billy or Jason or Timothy?"
"Nooo. But they don't matter,
they're really not in my class anyway."
"Don't you think their opinion of
you matters more than all the rest of those kids put together?" Curley
responded. Jonathan didn't say anything. "What do you think all your
friends will think of you when they hear that you’re a thief?"
"I don't care what anyone
thinks?"
"What about us? Don't you care what
we think about you?" Kate asked softly.
"Why should I? You guys don't really
care about me. I'm not your real son or nothing. Its not like you love me or
anything. I'm not going to be here forever. They'll take me away like they did
last time or something. You guys'll probably get rid of me eventually anyway.
So why shouldn't I do what I feel like? Its none of your business anyway."
"Jonathan, you don't really believe
all that do you?" Kate’s voice was trembling.
"Why shouldn't I. If you guys really
loved me Curley would have chosen me instead of Tommy for his team. You guys
really like Tommy."
"That's not fair Jonathan, I would
have chosen you if I could have. But your tryout went so badly, I couldn't
without every kid in town resenting it."
"You
could too! That's a lie! All the kids told me! Coach’s prerogative. Any
coach can have his son on his team if he wants to. If you'd wanted me I'd be on
the team."
"Jonathan, there are a lot of things
that you can do in life if you want to. But the real question is would it be
fair to the other kids - or to you. There are coaches who put their sons on
their teams the first year they can, even though they can't play at all. All
the other kids resent it, and they wind up hurting the teams performance all
year. Is that fair. Maybe they can do it - but is it fair. More important
nobody is very nice to those kids around the field. Don't you think that what
your friends think of you is important? Do you really want everyone to go
around saying he's only on the team just because he’s the coaches son?" In
the heat of the discussion, Jonathan realized that Curley had called him his son by mistake. "Yes, I would
like to be on the team just because I was your son. But I'm not - am I?"
The boy said in a very quiet, very sad, little voice. "So I might as well
leave here and get it over with."
Curley and Kate looked at each other.
They were just beginning to understand the problem. "Jonathan we love you.
We don't want you to leave. We want you to stay here, and we want to do
everything we can to help you. A lot of what you say just isn't true. Some of
it's pretty unfair to yourself and to others. You'll just have to keep plugging
on your schoolwork. We're sure you will eventually catch up. You may get set
back for a while, but if you keep trying - you’ll succeed in the end. I know
that you don't really believe all this now, but we hope you will someday. For
now we have to decide what you are going to do about this theft - and the
others you are suspected of, and what your punishment will be. Kate and I have
talked about this for the last three hours and we have decided that first,
tomorrow morning we are going over to the boy's house from whom you stole the
Walkman, and you'll return it and apologize. You will also have to do extra
work around the house to pay for the damage to the locker. In addition, you are
grounded for the immediate future. You are to stay in this house, and not to
leave it without permission. We are deeply ashamed of you. You have acted like
a baby; only babies steal because they don't know any better. They don't know
what it feels like to have somebody take what is yours away and they don't care.
Just like you say you don't care. Accordingly for the weekend you are going to
be treated just like a baby. You will have no say in what you're going to do,
and you will be told where you can sit and when you can move. You may only
speak when you are told to. The only toys you'll get will be the ones little
kids play with. Is that clear! On Monday we'll discuss what happens next. You
won't be going to school because Mr. Miller has put you under indefinite
suspension. That, I'm afraid, means it’s very unlikely that you will be able to
move ahead with your classmates this year. We're sorry about that - but maybe
if you work hard over the summer and next year, you will be able to catch
up."
"Alright dear it's time to get you
ready for bed, I called Tommy's mother and she brought over some extra clothing
for you." As she was talking Curley left the room and went downstairs to
bring up the bundle that Mrs. Coughlin had brought over. She lifted the near
naked boy up and carried him over to the changing table. Jonathan lay back
wondering what was going to happen to him. Mrs. Curley was very gentle; she
showed a lot of concern. Jonathan thought maybe he'd been a little unfair. He
noticed that she'd been crying and that made him feel not so good inside.
"I don't think you're going to like the next two days very much Jonathan,
but I do want you to realize that we do love you very very much." She
kissed him on the forehead, and took a towlette and wiped his tear streaked
cheeks. She gave him a hug. When Curley came in Jonathan looked at the bundle
with both fear, and strangely, some anticipation. His stepfather handed his
stepmother a washrag and she proceeded to wash him head to toe. She then
proceeded to oil him up carefully with a bottle of baby magic instead of the
usual baby oil. "I think this smells much nicer than plain old baby
oil." she said. After she'd pulled on his plastic pants, his stepfather
handed her Tommy's snap-waisted sleeper. Jonathan looked at it, "That's
not so bad." he thought. He'd actually felt a little jealous of Tommy when
he wore it, and all the extra special attention Tommy seemed to get.
After he was dressed for bed, his father
picked him up and carried him over to the freshly made bed, pulled back the
covers and put him inside. "Under no circumstances are you to get out of
this bed. If we find you out of it at anytime without permission we will tie
you back in it." Jonathan knew his foster father wasn't kidding. Curley
never said anything he didn't mean. He suddenly realized that he was hungry,
and he started to say "No dinner?” but Curley put his finger to his lips.
"Jonathan, you are not to open your mouth unless we tell you to. Otherwise
we will put one of these in it and tie it there." He held up a pacifier
that Tommy's mother had dropped off with the clothes. "Your foster mother
is bringing you your dinner now. Jonathan looked up to see his mother coming in
the room. She was carrying a baby bottle filled with milk! "That's for
babies!" As he was speaking Curley stuck the pacifier in his mouth.
"Don't take it out when we put it there unless you want to wear it tied
there. Do you understand? Tommy nodded his head. He hated the thing. He looked
over at his foster mother, and at the bottle she had with considerable
distaste.
Kate sprinkled some of the milk on her
arm. "Seems the right temperature to me." She smiled at Jonathan.
"You better drink up because this is all you're getting tonight. His
foster father took the pacifier back out of his mouth and Kate stuck the nipple
of the bottle in. "Drink it all down, and we'll let you out of bed in the
morning to play a while before breakfast." They sat there and waited.
Resignedly he began to suck on the nipple. Kate placed his hands on the bottle,
"you may hold your bottle Jonathan." They left the room and turned
off the lights.
Jonathan lay there a while drinking the
milk. He hated the bottle. He felt really stupid drinking out of it. After a
while the bottle fell from the exhausted boys hands as he drifted off to sleep.
In the morning the bird was singing at
the window as his foster mother came in. She was singing a little lullaby. He
stretched sleepily and yawned as she came over to him. "How's my little
baby today?" She smiled and gave him a kiss.
"Are you really going to treat me
like a baby all weekend?"
In answer she simply picked up his
pacifier and put it to his lips. He groaned and took it in his mouth. Stupid
thing - he had a feeling he was going to grow to really hate it! He was picked
up and taken over to the table to be changed. She patted him on the fanny a few
times while oiling him - and gave him the usual hugs. He felt a little better.
Even if he were going to be treated like a little baby, at least he wouldn't
have to try and change his own diapers! Jonathan sighed a little bit and
relaxed a bit. Kate noticed the boy's tense body relax and she tickled him just
a bit. He giggled. She smiled down "This doesn't have to be all bad you
know." He nodded, the pacifier still in his mouth that he understood. She
reached down under the table and brought out one of Tommy's onesies. He held up
his arms while she pulled it on. He didn't mind this too much either, as he
kinda liked onesies - even if they were a bit infantile for his taste. He
always liked the feeling when she snapped him up at the crotch. She hoisted him
off the table and took his hand and walked with him down to the breakfast
table.
They'd found a highchair somewhere. He
didn't really fit in it but they managed to get him in it and pull him up to
the table. He definitely didn't like the bib. A bowl of mush was put next to
him, and he looked around for a spoon. His foster father laughed "Oh-no!
Babies get fed." Kate picked up a small spoon off the sink and sat down
next to him, "open up." The whole idea humiliated him, the reality
was worse. Every so often Kate would deliberately miss with the spoon and soon
his face and bib were covered by cereal. "I can see Jonathan's really
getting into the part." Curley observed amiably.
After breakfast, he was taken back
upstairs to his room to be changed again. "Time out for a while."
Curley said. "Its time to go over to the Boudreaux's and return the tape
recorder. This will be your only break this weekend and we expect you to
behave. We want you to take this as seriously young man." They changed him
into light day diapers, which were barely noticeable under the plain elastic
waisted trousers and neat striped polo shirt he was given to wear. The drive to
the Boudreaux's took only about ten minutes. It was a neat ranch house on a
quiet street. Jonathan could see that Curley was clearly embarrassed as they
walked up to the front door. His foster mother stayed in the car. When they
knocked the door opened immediately, Peter Boudreaux and his father George
stepped out and looked hostilely at Jonathan. Curley handed him the Walkman.
"Here!" Jonathan said,
"I'm sorry I stole your old Walkman." The boy snatched it from him
and scowled. "You just say that cause you got caught. I hope someone
steals your stuff from you so you can see how it feels like. I never did
anything to you!"
Curley looked at Jonathan. "Yeah!
You’re right. I am only giving it back cause I got caught. If it's any
satisfaction to you they expelled me from school and I'm grounded forever. You
guys shouldn't laugh at me all the time in school!"
"Well you act pretty stupid all the
time. Just cause you have to wear diapers doesn't mean that you’re
special!"
"Anyway, I guess I am really sorry.
I never laughed at you, and you don't always get everything right either."
Mr. Boudreaux was listening to the
conversation between the two boys intently. "Peter, I think that it's time
for you to accept Jonathan's apology."
"Alright!" Peter said to
Jonathan.
"OK, Peter run into the house, I
want to talk to Sergeant Curley alone. Peter disappeared and Curley motioned
Jonathan back to the car where he went and sat behind his foster mother in the
car. He could see Curley and Mr. Boudreaux talking on the front step while he
waited. After a while his foster father came back to the car looking worried.
"Mr. Boudreaux said that he was going to press charges against Jonathan.
We talked a while and he said he'd think it over at least." He shook his
head worriedly as they drove away.
When they reached the Curley's house, it
was back upstairs for a change for Jonathan. He was doubled diapered, just like
at night, and to his horror, Tommy's stupid diaper cover with elastic at the
legs and waist was put over his diaper with a matching little top with round
collar trimmed in the baby blue to match the cover. He got to wear white socks
on top of that. The diaper cover was real baby stuff, with little white lambs
all over it. It pooched out all over.
After being dressed, he was taken down to
the backyard to play on a blanket since it was a beautiful late spring day.
"I called your baseball coach and said that you were grounded for the day
Jonathan. Of course you could go watch as you are." Jonathan shook his
head furiously.
"Hello Arthur." Jonathan looked
up to see the gray haired old lady next door leaning over the fence looking at
him. He blushed furiously. "My doesn't Jonathan look nice today. Is he
going to be playing out here long. I'm sure my grandchildren would love to come
over and play with him when they come by this afternoon. They're from out of town,
and will be here only for the weekend. Caitlin loves babies. Anyway I brought
down a toy for Jonathan." She handed a baby doll dressed in a diaper over
the fence to Curley who took it and handed it to Jonathan. Jonathan was really
disgusted, put it down like it would burn him, and moved to the furthest corner
of the blanket away from the wretched thing. Both Curley and Mrs. Lyons
chuckled at the boy's look of horror. "It won't bite Jonathan - all babies
love their dollies you know.” Jonathan snorted around the pacifier that Curley
had earlier put into his mouth. He desperately hoped that he'd be inside before
the old ladies grandchildren got there.
Mrs. Lyons thought that Jonathan was a
cute boy, and she'd listen attentively that morning when Kate had come over and
explained the whole situation. "We want to make it absolutely plain that
such behavior is out of the question. He's been beaten all his life. We are
only beginning to understand why he did it, and this is not a solution to the
problem. The punishment is only to make it very clear to him what we think of
stealing. We want to make sure that he never forgets this weekend. We think
he's a good boy, and we love him a lot. He really got us thinking last night -
the world can look pretty miserable from a child’s shoes, and its really not
surprising that Jonathan wants to get back at it once in a while. We think that
he's afraid we'll abandoned him because he's not our son, and underlying the
stealing was the feeling that if he got caught, then he'd only be getting the
separation over with sooner - perhaps before he could be even more hurt by
it."
Mrs. Lyons thought the punishment highly
unusual, but agreed that a kid in Jonathan's position, called for unusual
measures. "Besides," she laughed, "I really did enjoy Tommy and
his baby fantasies. He was such a nice boy; he made me feel like a grandmother
all over again. You must have hated giving him back to his mother."
Mrs. Lyons grandchildren, all 4 of them,
did arrive that morning, and played in the backyard next door until Jonathan
was taken in to be fed lunch. It was mortifying for Jonathan. Particularly,
when the little girl Caitlin came over and wanted to play dollies with him. She
was only about 3 and kept giggling about the big baby boy. Mr. Curley made him
play with her - surprisingly; he did so in fairly good grace. Mrs. Lyons could
see that he hated the "dollies", and realized, impressed, that
Jonathan was just being nice to the little girl. "That boy has a real
gentle streak to him!" she thought approvingly. Jonathan felt incredibly
babyish playing with her, and winced whenever one of the older children would
stick his or her head over the fence to comment. The other kids thought the
whole thing wildly amusing. "Thank God they don't live here!" Jonathan
thought.
For Jonathan, the low point came that
afternoon. Mrs. Curley drove him out to a shopping mall some distance from
Brookline. He was dressed in Tommy's light chocolate corduroy rompers. The legs
were real short, and his plastic pants and diapers bulged out under the elastic
at the back and were plainly visible through the leg holes every time Kate made
him sit down. Which she did on a bench in the mall outside a Toys R Us. The
worst was the leather harness. Where she'd gotten it (Sarah Jackoby) Jonathan
didn't know, but he saw several toddlers wearing virtually identical devices.
He had to walk down the crowded central corridor of the mall in front of his
foster mother. A lot of kids snickered and stared at the big baby. One little
boy, about 3, toddled up to him where they were standing in front of a fountain
and wanted to share his teddy bear. Jonathan wished he could sink into the
pavement. With the harness on he couldn't even run away. The whole performance
lasted at least a lifetime as far as Jonathan was concerned. He was given a box
of pampers to carry back to the car from Toys R Us. The extra large kind that
really would fit him - it said fits up to
a 28-inch waist right on the box. Several people stopped to ask why he was
dressed the way he was, but were mollified by Kate who said that he was
seriously retarded and hyperactive so that they had no choice about the diapers
and harness.
He was desperately relieved when they got
home. He turned down Curley's offer of a trip to the movies. He was back in bed
at six. - It was still broad daylight, and waited, bored out of his mind until
he finally fell asleep at nine.
The next morning, when Kate got him up,
he looked at her with a note of urgency. "What is it Jonathan? She asked.
"I gotta go number two."
"So?"
"So can I go to the bathroom."
"If you can wait till Monday
Jonathan, but this weekend you're a baby."
"But I gotta go - bad."
The urgency grew as he was changed for
the morning and taken downstairs for breakfast. He was sitting in his onesie
with a bib on when Sarah walked in. "Hi Mrs. Curley, how's baby Jonathan
today?" She looked at Jonathan with a smug expression. Jonathan didn't
like the way she was acting, but at the moment he had more urgent problems.
"Why don't you finish feeding Jonathan for me Sarah, I've got to get the
dishes washed up.”
"I'd be pleased to”, she said taking
the spoon and globbing cold cereal on it. "Open up Jonathan." She
managed to miss putting half of it in his mouth, with the result that a big
globbet ran down his chin and onto his bid. "Babies sure are messy! Baby
Jonathan looks awfully red in the face Mrs. Curley."
"Oh babies often do that just before
they mess their diapers Sarah. In a few minutes he will be fine."
Jonathan couldn't believe his ears - this
wasn't happening. Tears ran down his face. Sarah laughed, "he looks real
funny."
He couldn't hold it and he felt his bowel
movement forced out and into his diapers. The warm soft mass wouldn't stop
coming, and it squeezed up the back between his cheeks, and down into his
crotch, coming to rest warmly against the back of his testicles. He turned even
a deeper shade of red. Sarah looked at him "Oh-my! I think you're right
Mrs. Curley, he pooped his pants." Jonathan wanted to strangle her.
"We'd better get him up for a
change? Don't you think Sarah?"
Kate
came round the table and pulled the highchair away, wiping spilt cereal off his
face with his bib.
Sarah followed them all the way into
Jonathan's bedroom. She was secretly thrilled. She'd been dying to see Jonathan
changed, and this might be her only chance. Besides, she thought, it’s his own
fault and serves him right. She stood there watching with keen interest through
the whole affair, Kate explaining all about how you changed babies as she took
Jonathan's diaper and wiped him off, folding the mess into it and carrying it
into the bathroom where she rinsed it in the toilet. Returning she finished
cleaning Jonathan’s rectum, with his legs pulled back over his head and his
behind fully exposed to Sarah's view. After oiling Jonathan, she placed fresh
diapers under him, carefully instructing Sarah on how they were folded, and let
Sarah pin him up. Jonathan was near to dying of humiliation.
When Kate was done, she put the red-faced
boy down on the carpet in his room. "Would you watch baby for me Sarah
while I go put his dirty things in the laundry?" Sarah nodded, and Kate
picked up Jonathans clothes and headed down the stairs.
After she'd left Jonathan exploded at
her. "That was real mean of you. I wouldn't have done that to you. I never
want to see you again - I hate you."
"That's too bad Jonathan. Besides it
all your own fault. I wanted to watch, so I did, and it’s probably the last
time I'll get to see you anyway!"
Jonathan was startled by the anger in her
voice. "What do you mean?"
"My mother won't let me play with
you anymore. She said she didn't want her daughter playing with a thief. She
let me come over to say goodbye. Damn you! I liked you so much! Why'd you have
to go and let everybody down? It's not like you have nobody that cares about
you. How do you think all those little boys who looked up to you so much in the
wet set are going to feel when they find out their hero's a thief. What do you
think Terry's going to say. You think he wants to go around with a thief? But
most of all how could you do it to Mr. and Mrs. Curley? How do you think Mr.
Curley feels? He's a policeman; he supposed to protect everyone from crooks.
Now he's got a foster son who’s a thief. How do you think that makes him feel
down where he works?"
"Why should I care about them
anyway? I'm not their son. I bet they don't even really love me. The state just
pays them money to keep me."
"Jonathan you idiot! Don't you know
why the Curleys are so upset? How can you be so stupid? They're scared that the
court will take you away from them now. They love you. Don't you
understand." She slapped him. He stood there stunned as she ran from the
room crying.
When Mrs. Curley came back, there was a
very quiet little boy sitting on the rug. As she came in he got up and ran over
to her and hugged her about the waist. She could see tears running down his
face. She picked him up and carried him over to the bed and sat down with him
on her lap and rocked him back and forth for an hour.
That evening, Jonathan was brought down
to dinner and was seated in his usual chair. The conversation was quiet and
subdued and no one talked much. Mr. Curley carried him upstairs to bed.
"What would you like to wear to bed tonight young fella - sleepers or
superman?"
"C-could I wear the sleepers again,
I feel kinda bad."
"Sure," Curly said, giving
Jonathan a hug as he hefted the boy up onto the table to be changed.
Curley sat with Jonathan for over an hour
reading from A Boy and his Horse the
fourth book in Narnia series. His foster mother sat with them as Curley read on
in his big gentle voice. Eventually, the boy drifted off to sleep.
During breakfast the next morning, his
foster parents seemed worried. Jonathan had woken up in the middle of the night
after a nightmare in which he was already back in the JDC and his real mother
was beating him while the counselors watched and cheered. No one talked very
much, until right at the end.
"Jonathan," Curley began,
"Mr. Struthers, your probation officer is coming over to talk to you. He
wants to know how you feel about staying here, and he wants to talk to you
about what’s been going on at school. As you are a ward of the court, he is
effectively your guardian. Its up to him whether you stay here or go somewhere
else. We want what is best for you, and he is not your enemy, so please be
polite and tell him everything he asks as truthfully as you can. And what ever
happens, make us proud of you."
Jonathan's heart sank. They were going to
take him away.
Officer Struthers was coming at 9:00 AM
and Jonathan waited in his room. He wondered if he should pack his things.
There wasn't a lot that was really his. Curley had given him his son's old
baseball mitt. He went over to his drawer and took it out and put it next to
him as he sat on the bed. Fingering it as he waited, tears running down his
little face. He bitterly regretted stealing the Walkman, and he wished, he
really wished he could do something right to make the Curleys proud of him. If
only he weren't so stupid. He was going to miss Sarah and Tommy and the whole
wet set too. They wouldn't be there when he got back to his old school. A car
drove up to the front of the house, and he heard the door open and then slam
shut. Footsteps up the walk, and voices at the door. Finally, he heard someone
climbing the stairs and a knock on his door.
"Can I come in young master
Jonathan?" "Y-yes sir." Jonathan responded in a quiet voice. Mr.
Struthers entered the room, and taking a chair sat down opposite him.
"Well I hear things haven't been going too well for you lately here. Why
don't you tell me your version of events.” Jonathan blinked back tears.
"I-I stole some stuff from school, and I guess I-I'm pretty dumb there
too. Maybe I should try to w-work harder." He kept choking back tears.
After a while he told Mark Struthers about the baseball tryouts, and how he'd
thought that meant Mr. Curley didn't really want him cause all the other kids
told him that coaches kids didn't even have to try out cause their fathers
automatically put them on the team. M-Mr. Struthers p-please let me stay here.
I don't want to go anywhere else. I promise I'll n-n-never do anything bad ever
again. P-please. I-I'll try harder at school and everything."
He heard Mr. Struthers talking to the Curleys
downstairs for a while and then drive off. After a while the Curleys came
upstairs and knocked on his bedroom door. They came in and sat down next to
him. Jonathan could see that his foster mother's eyes were wet. The boy looked
up at the two of them questioningly. "A-am I going to h-have to
leave."
"That's up to you Jonathan."
Curley looked at him with a smile; Mr. Struthers is willing, if you want him
to, to ask the court to look favorably on a petition of adoption from us for
you. How about it, do you think maybe you'd like to call us Mom and Dad?"
Jonathan stared at them in astonishment. "Y-you mean it! I thought they
were going to take me away? Can I really call you Dad?"
"You sure can son."
As Mark Struthers drove off he was
shaking his head in bemusement. He was relieved that the Boudreauxs had
withdrawn the charges against Jonathan. The guy was all right. Having heard the
exchange between the two boys, he had grilled his own son and a few of his
friends; it had been clear that a group of them had been giving Jonathan a
pretty systematic hazing, and that the stealing had been partly in retaliation.
Jonathan had been pretty selective in his victims. As a consequence, Peter had
lost the Walkman again for a while, until he learned a little more compassion.
Struthers had called the school and explained the full situation to Mr. Miller.
They had agreed that a one-week suspension would be more appropriate than an
indefinite. "So like it or not, Jonathan's back in school in a week. I
hope his new parents don't let him take it as a vacation. It's astounding. Who
would have ever think that boy and the vicious brat of three months ago were
the same person. He's like an entirely new boy." Struthers was convinced
that Jonathan had really changed - Jonathan had found a real family, and that
was pretty rare in this day and age. He hadn't expected the boy to stay
completely out of trouble in the best of circumstances, and hadn't been at all
surprised by his performance in school or his petty thefts. But the underlying
change in the boy's demeanor and attitude was incredible. In dealing with that
kid for 4 years he hadn't once seen him show any emotion at all. If the kid
hadn't been so rotten he could almost have been autistic as far as feelings
were concerned. The Curleys and their rather strange treatment had clearly
cracked the kid’s shell wide open. They've a long row to hoe, he thought, but
in the end they’re going to get a pretty good plant. As he turned into the
court house parking lot, he was still thinking of the Curleys bizarre approach
to reformation of young incorrigibles."
The, now, one week suspension flew by for
Jonathan. His mother worked him to
death, but he didn't mind, and arriving at school the following Monday morning,
he had promptly walked into Mr. Millers office and handed him a fistful of
grubby ones and fives to pay for the damaged locker. "I earned it all
myself, Sir, it's the first money I ever made." He proudly said. Even Mr.
Miller was amazed at his attitude, until Jonathan went on: "My father says
a man always pays his debts."
"Your father Jonathan?" Mr.
Miller knew that Jonathan hadn't seen his father in at least 5 years. "My
new dad, Sir, I'm being adopted by the Curleys!" the boy was bursting.
"Jonathan! That's wonderful.
Congratulations! You'll be the envy of half the kids in school; every boy in
little league wants Curley as a coach and you get him as a father. Pretty good
deal if you ask me."
The news of Jonathan's adoption spread
rapidly. Coming on the heels of a number of kids being disciplined for hazing,
Jonathan's friends were willing to conditionally accept him back. Nurse Jackoby
was somewhat more skeptical and Sarah remained interdicted, at least after
school, but she greeted Jonathan back to the changing table with her usual
warmth and cheer. Terry read him the riot act. But Terry often did that, and,
Jonathan thought wryly, was often right. So things went back to an even if not
particularly high, level for Jonathan at school.
The week passed swiftly for Jonathan. He
found that though he was not playing with the Majors, most of the kids in the
minors were still his age. It wasn't a terribly serious league, and despite his
admittedly abominable fielding and batting, there was a place for him there.
Despite his continuous bobbles, the coach discovered that Jonathan had a
remarkable throwing arm for a boy of 10. Thus, Jonathan found himself pitching
on odd days and backing up the other outfielders for long throws to home. Minor
league ball is more like a comedy of errors than serious baseball. Thus, his
continuous striking out at bat was nothing really exceptional. He would have
been an exceptional pitcher if he could have caught the ball, very good even
for the majors, though he could be a little wild. He enjoyed it immensely,
particularly as his parents came to every game. In the minors, the boys weren't
issued real uniforms, only a team shirt and a hat. Thus, Jonathan opted for
fairly loose trousers, and wore his shirt hanging out to avoid undue attention
to his diapers. Most of the kids knew he wore them anyway, but at this level
razing other players was discouraged, and most of the kids were to busy trying
to pick up fundamentals to really be very competitive. Once in a while he got
kidded, cause the diapers sometimes showed, but his good-natured acceptance of
the teasing endeared him to his teammates more than anything else. The season
was progressing pretty smoothly then, for Jonathan, and he'd made a number of
new friends. Once he saw Tobin Wheeler hanging around the backstop when he was
batting. He knew his diapers bulged unavoidably when he batted cause he had to
push his hips out like the coach said. It seemed that inevitably, he'd get a
pat on his padded butt every time he got instruction - which given his poor
record, was fairly often. He always smiled at the coach when he did it. Coach
Greenley always wondered about why Jonathan gave him that odd look.
On a Saturday afternoon they were playing
the Cubs down on the elementary school field (the minor league teams rarely got
to use the elaborate little league field). Jonathan was pitching at the very
end of a long game, and though winning didn't mean all that much, they were
ahead by 1 run at the bottom of the sixth and last inning. It was down to the
last batter, and Jonathan had gotten two strikes and 4 balls on him (it takes 6
balls for a walk in the minors). Curley, sitting on the lawn behind the Cubs
bench couldn't help but notice that one of the fathers who didn't attend very
often was getting pretty excited and a little out of control and had started
yelling comments down at the other teams batters. Just as he was about to tell
the guy to clam up, the boy at bat took a swak at one of Jonathan's pitches,
catching on the bottom edge. The ball popped up into the air in an easy pop fly
straight, it would appear, into the pitchers upraised glove: except that
Jonathan's glove was in the wrong place and the ball dropped to the ground
right at his feet, allowing a boy on third to run home and tie the game.
"Sheeit! The man exclaimed. How
could anybody miss that fly. Why doesn't someone give that stupid kid
glasses?"
"Glasses?" Curley thought - a
sinking feeling in his stomach. He wondered why it hadn't occurred to him
before, or to anyone else for that matter.
After the game Curley drove Jonathan and
a couple of his friends down to McDonalds for burger and a coke to celebrate
the tie. As they were driving up, he pointed to a sign in the window of the
restaurant that advertised a special in great large red letters. "Jonathan,
what’s the special?" He asked casually.
"Two big macs for a dollar."
Jonathan said promptly, "with the special coupon."
"Oh - who told you."
"It says so on the sign Dad."
Jonathan said baffled.
"So it does, so it does,” Curley
started to get a sick feeling about all the trouble Jonathan had been having in
school. That evening he found the coupon in the mail. Casually he handed it to
Jonathan - "what's this coupon for son?"
Jonathan sat and stared at it a while.
"I'm not sure, I think it’s from McDonalds." The coupon repeated
almost word for word the sign in the window that afternoon.
"Jonathan, when was the last time
your eyes were tested?" Kate, cooking at the stove suddenly straightened
and turned around to look at Jonathan.
"I don't know." the boy
replied.
The doctor’s office was located down at a
small office building. He welcomed Jonathan in and listened to his parents
explain about Jonathan's problems in school and apparent lack of hand-eye
co-ordination. Jonathan felt distinctly uncomfortable listening to this
catalogue of his failings. The doctor looked down at the diapered boy, and said
"Maybe we can find out what's the matter with you Jonathan, and led him
into his examining room. He patted the seat on a big padded chair "Hop up here,
and we'll check out those peepers of yours." He first asked Jonathan to
read letters off a wall chart. Jonathan had no trouble making out the letters
down to near the bottom line. The doctor went "Hmpf!" But didn't say
anything else. He swung a big black thing in front of Jonathan and flipped
through lenses to see if any made things on the wall clearer and found only a
marginal difference. "Hmpf!" he went again. "Well, Jonathan your
vision seems pretty normal so far. Hmm, hmm. Wait a minute. Here look at my
finger". He held it right in front of Jonathan's nose. "What do you
see?" "A finger?" Jonathan replied helpfully. "Do you see
one or two fingers?" "Two of course, you always do when you look at
them that close." "Alright, fair enough, now I want you to try and squeeze
your eyes together and tell me when you can make it one finger." Jonathan
was able to do so only when the doctor pulled his finger back about 3 feet from
Jonathan's nose. "I'll be darned!" The doctor said quietly. He pulled
down another arrangement of lenses and played with the black machine some more
and repeated the tests. Then he peeled back Jonathan's eyelids and asked him to
follow a light. He was looking at the muscles surrounding the eyes.
"Jonathan has a very unusual vision
problem, but fortunately easily surgically correctible. The muscles that
control his close focusing are too big. That is they can't constrict enough to
focus at close distances, and he always sees double if he tries to look at
objects within a few feet. It's no wonder he drops balls and can't read. This
should have been picked up years ago. Unfortunately, routine school eye tests
almost never find it, and if his mother had never arranged for a private, more
thorough eye examination it would explain how he's gotten so far without it
being detected. I'm calling Doctor Barton, and I think we can set up an
appointment down at the Children’s Surgery Clinic for this week.
Jonathan looked at the Doctor, with
sudden hope in his eyes, "Does that mean I'll be able to learn to read like
the other kids?" According to your father Jonathan, and from what you read
off the wall charts, you already can. You just can't read anything close up,
and we're going to fix that up. You'll be in the hospital for about 4 days, and
a week later you'll be back in school better'n new."
Thus, it was that a on thursday of that
week Jonathan found himself undressing in a small children’s ward at the local
hospital. One of the nurses gave him a green gown to wear, and waited patiently
for him to change. Jonathan blushed a little bit, but as she made no move to
leave, he finally took off his shirt and pulled down his trousers. "You'll
have to help me with my diapers," he blushed. "It's amazing!" he
thought to himself, "how I feel more naked in diapers than if really had
no clothes on."
No, that's all right Jonathan; I think we
better leave them on. Otherwise you’re likely to get that gown all wet when we
you're put to sleep for surgery. Don't feel bad, we diaper a lot of kids after
we put them out, because they often loose control under sedation. We take the
diapers off before they wake up - so they usually never know. All the doctors
and nurses around here are used to seeing kids your age in them." Jonathan
wasn't at all sure this was true, and thought that maybe she was just trying to
make him feel better.
She had him get up on a sort of table on
wheels. She called it a gurney, and a man came in a green gown a bit like his
own. "Hello Jonathan, I'm Dr. Aspinwall, I'm going to give you a shot to
put you to sleep, and when you wake up, it'll be all over. Dr. Thompson over
here is going to operate on you. Now try to remember that when you wake up
you'll have bandages on your eyes so you won't be able to see. You're going to
have to wear them for about 4 days and then we'll take them off. You won't be
allowed to read or watch TV for a while, but you can listen to the radio. Your
mother is right here too, and she'll be with you when you wake up. You ready?
OK. Now you're going to feel this needle a bit, it'll kinda burn at first, but
it won't last long. Think you can be a brave boy? Lets see ---. Now I want you
to count to ten Jonathan."
"1, 2, 3, 4, - 5, -." Jonathan
felt very groggy. He tried to look around, but couldn't see anything. He tried
to move his arms, but the effort seemed too much. He was scared, where is
everybody - where was he? Then he felt a voice and a reassuring touch on his
shoulder. "Hello there Jonathan. How are you feeling? It's all over and
Dr. Thompson said everything went just fine. You relax now and in a bit we'll
take you back to your room. Your mother's right here." He felt her
unmistakable touch on his shoulder and relaxed. She stayed there, and he could
feel her holding his hand. After a bit he could feel the motion of the cart as
the wheeled him out of the room, down a corridor and into another room. He felt
groggy and dizzy, and called out, his voice faint and weak to his ears when he
momentarily lost contact with his mother. "Its alright dear I'm right
here, they're moving you into bed. "OK now, altogether, 1-2-3, and he felt
several sets of hands lift him and slide him onto a bed." Another voice
said, "He's a wetter, lets get him changed now. He could feel his gown
being pulled up, the air cold against his skin. He heard tapes being pulled and
felt a tugging at his waist, and realized that he was now wearing a disposable
rather than his own diapers. It felt strange. He wanted his own diapers. He
whimpered a little bit, as he tried to move on his own, but somebody put a
gentle hand on him and held him down. "Just lie quiet Jonathan, and we'll
get you all fixed up. He could feel them lift him up, and then a dry diaper
being slid under him and being taped up. "There we go. All cozy and
secure." Then they pulled the covers over him. He realized he'd just been
changed in front of a whole crowd of people and blushed inside. He wondered if
they all thought he was a big baby. He reached out for his mother’s hand.
"Mommy?"
"I'm here dear." Her reassuring
touch. Comforted, the small boy drifted off to sleep. His mother stayed there
for about an hour, sitting next to his bed, until the nurses came and checked
him over. "He looks just fine, Mrs. Curley, the effects of anesthesia have
completely worn off, and his pulse is normal. We'll be checking him every hour.
Why don't you go home and get some sleep. He's not likely to wake up for quite
a while. Children always sleep a long time after anesthesia, and he will want
to see you first thing in the morning. Mr. Curley is here too, and he's ready
to take you home. We'll take good care of Jonathan."
In the morning, it took Jonathan a little
bit of time to realize that he was awake, and that it was daytime with his eyes
completely covered. He gradually remembered what had occurred and he heard
voices around him. Nurses moving back and forth. The sound of carts going down
the hall. The clanging of breakfast trays. Children's voices. Some in his own
room. "Mommy?" There was no answer. He wondered where she was.
Probably at home. He heard footsteps near his bed, and stirred. "Good
morning Jonathan, how are we feeling today?" He could feel a hand pick up
his arm. "She's taking my pulse." he realized. She put his arm down.
"Your mother will be here soon, she said she'd be back first thing this
morning." Your mother, just
hearing the nurse say that made him feel good. "Your father’s already been
here, but you were sound asleep so he didn't disturb you. He's off at work, but
said he'd be back at noon."
"Now lets get you fixed up young
man. He could feel her pull the sheets back. Diaper time again, he thought to
himself. He wondered how many people were watching. The voices of the other
children in the room, he could count two, suddenly stilled. They're watching,
he thought. The nurse peeled the tapes off, and with long practice he lifted
his fanny and she pulled the wet diaper out from underneath him and slid
another in its place. "That's a good boy Jonathan, I can see your pretty
experienced at this." He heard a boy giggle a little across the room. He
bravely smiled back, again wondering how many people were watching this. She
patted his shoulder and then he could feel her rubbing baby magic between his
legs and over his genitals, and then the diaper was taped in place and his gown
pulled back down. "Would you like to sit up Jonathan?" He nodded and
was surprised when she pushed a button and the back of the bed lifted up.
"There we go, now I'm going to take your hand and show you where some
things are. That's a call button. If you need me, just push the button and I'll
be in right away. Now over here is your Walkman radio with your earphones -
your father left it for you. "Walkman? I don't have a Walkman.,” he
thought. Then he realized that Curley must have given it to him as a surprise.
The nurse showed him how to turn it on and how to adjust the stations. Now,
before I go, the boy over to your right is Jason, he broke his leg yesterday
and we had to put a pin in it, and over on the other side of the room is Bobby,
he's had some surgery to fix his stomach. Bobby's seven and Jason is ten, same
age as you. Now I've got to go.
A few minutes later he heard her talking
to Bobby. "Time for a change Bobby."
"Aww I don't wanna wear these
things. I don't hafta at home."
"What does your mother do to stop
you wetting the bed then?"
"She doesn't do anything - just
changes the sheets."
"Judging from your performance here,
that must be a lot of work. Maybe she'll decide that diapers might be better
for both of you - they'll keep you warm and dry at night and save her a lot of
work."
"But only babies wear diapers! And
everybody see me. If ya hafta can't you take me somewhere else?"
"Jonathan over there certainly isn't
a baby, and he's certainly a better sport than you are. I'm afraid we can't
move you any more than absolutely necessary for a while, dear. As for everybody
seeing you, well you seem to enjoy watching Jonathan get changed - now it’s
your turn." Jonathan realized that he was thoroughly enjoying the boy's
discomfort - not to mention his introduction to diapers. When the nurse came
back to check on him - she could feel her fingers slide under at the leg
opening of his diapers - he asked her: "Is this a special room just for
bedwetters?" He heard her chuckle, "The tides flow here every night
Jonathan, and a lot during the day as well - so you don't have to feel
alone." Jonathan sighed in relief.
His mother was soon in to see him, and
was relieved to see that he was feeling much better. She sat and talked to him
for an hour before leaving, promising to be back later. His dad came in at
noon, and talked with him about baseball and school. As he was leaving he said,
"Your friends want to come visit you too, is it alright?" The next
day Terry, Sarah and Tommy all came to see him. It made him feel pretty good.
Sarah was full of news. Her mother had finally relented and she was allowed to
play over at his house again. Terry wanted to know if he wanted to sleep over
when he got out of the hospital. Jonathan was very pleased to accept - he'd
never done that before.
By Saturday Jonathan was full of pep, he
couldn't wait till Monday morning when they'd take the bandages off and he
could go home. When Monday finally arrived he was dying with anticipation. He
wondered whether he'd be able to read like they said, and what everybody would say
when he got back to school. Most of all, he was tired of being in bed. He was
scheduled to have his bandages removed at 1:00. At about 11 he heard a gurney
being wheeled into the room and a boy being lifted into the bed across from
his. Evidently he had been operated on and was just coming too. From the way
the nurses were acting he knew it was minor surgery and that the boy had not
been heavily sedated. Strangely, they tied him down. There seemed to be nobody
staying with him. "I wonder where his parents are. It frightened him to
think about what it was like when you didn't have any.
After a while, he could hear the boy
coming too. He clearly wasn't very groggy. Jonathan wondered what operation
he'd had. Must not have been very much, he thought. The boy started to swear
and pull at his bonds. "Let me the fuck up! What did you guys do to me
anyway! You bastards! ---." There was something familiar about the voice.
All of a sudden the sounds of struggling stopped abruptly. “Oh-shit!” He heard,
“Nooo---.” Jonathan thought he could detect a familiar tang to the air. He
reached over and pushed his call button. "Joe Kelly's gonna need a change
pretty quick!" He grinned to himself.
"Hi Joe."
Chapter 4
Jonathan could hardly wait to get back to
school, and when Monday came he was nearly jumping up and down with excitement.
Arriving in class, he took his seat in the front row. When Mrs. Hanlin came in
she welcomed him back and started the day's lesson. When reading period came
around, she asked who would like to start first. Jonathan's hand shot up. As he
stood there reading aloud from the now crystal clear text, he could sense the
other kids astonishment. Mrs Hanlin felt great chagrin, not only had she failed
to pick up his physical problem with reading - but after all the times he had
been put down - he could actually read. Evidently, he must have learned from
reading signs. Though he stammered a bit, and was hesitant at points, it was
truly amazing. He must be a very bright youngster she realized.
Jonathan was elated when he received his
report card. He had a C in math. Most other subjects were marked Incomplete, with an annotation that due
to physical disability, no grade would be entered for the year. That meant he
had a C average. "Jonathan, you get to move ahead with the class. But
remember, you've got a lot of catching up to do, so you're going to have to
work hard." Mrs. Hanlin had congratulated him, and said she was sorry that
he hadn't been treated better.
The bad news was, at least for Jonathan,
was that Sarah had gotten the extra promotion she'd craved. He'd congratulated
her and said that he was real pleased for her, but it was unmistakable that he
was upset. This bothered her a bit. "I-I guess I'm going to miss you a
whole lot - now that you’re going into sixth grade you probably won't have much
time for a fifth grader."
"Don't count on it Jonathan."
He had rather mixed emotions when she'd leaned over and
kissed him right on the mouth. She'd laughed at his shocked expression,
"If I don't have time to hang around you anymore, I wouldn't be able to
pat your cute little diapered butt anymore!" That had precipitated
considerable rough housing. While Sarah was a bit young to be entering sixth
grade, she was also a bit old for fifth, and in certain ways, not just
academically, was clearly a bit ahead of Jonathan.
By the end of school, there was only
about two weeks of the regular little league season left. Jonathan wished it
could last longer. All of a sudden he found himself the star of his team. In
fact, there was considerable grumbling from parents on the other teams. His
pitching accuracy was amazing for a ten year old. He didn't drop flys anymore,
and he was starting to connect regularly with the ball at bat. On Saturday
morning he was running around with the other members of the Cubs at the
elementary school field, waiting for the rest of the kids to arrive for a game.
They were tossing the ball back and forth, and boasting about how they were
going to demolish the Yankees. Since Jonathan had returned to the team they had
abruptly started to climb in the rankings. Burger King had a practice, so his
dad wasn't there, but he was surprised to see Burt Phillips, the assistant
Burger King Coach talking at the edge of the field to Mr. Samuels the Cub
Coach.
"Hey Jonathan! Front and center over
here." All the kids looked up. "You've been drafted by Burger
King."
"Drafted?" Jonathan looked at
the boy next to him. "What does that mean?"
"It means we're gonna lose you.
Didn't you know that we're the Burger King farm club? If they loose a kid, they
get to choose whomever they want from their farm club to finish out the season.
Your lucky, they're in second place this year. Hey! Your dad coaches Burger
King, doesn't he? He's lucky to have a son like you who plays so well. He'd get
first chance to have you anyway causa of that I guess." Jonathan suddenly
realized that his dad had been right not to put him on the team just because he
could. Now everybody knew he was going up cause he deserved it!"
It was a bit of a come down when he'd
arrived at the field. His father had given him a big grin, and he'd answered in
kind. Sarah and Tommy had run up and congratulated him. But he felt a stranger.
Burger King was one of the best teams in the league, and he suddenly realized that
he wasn't a star anymore. The term rookie had new meaning to him. He was
clearly expected to defer to the regulars while sitting on the bench, and on
the field had to prove himself anew. He did all right fielding, but when it
came to batting, he'd never had to face an older kid pitching. Tommy Clements
was one of the best in the league, and Jonathan managed only to fan air. He
retired feeling disgraced, but Mr. Phillips had given him a pat (on the fanny),
and said that he'd do better when he got used to major league pitching - he'd
mostly only be in the minimum two innings required for every player by the
league anyway. Chagrined, he was still thrilled to be in the majors - and
playing for his Dad!
The following Friday was the last day of
class. The whole school had a field day, and all the kids competed in running,
high jump, hurdles and sack races for half the day. There were even arm
wrestling contests, and Terry got blue ribbons, not only for their class, but
for beating the best kid in fifth grade too. He nearly beat the kid in sixth
grade as well. Jonathan got a white ribbon for third place in the boys and
girls three-legged race with Sarah. By the end of the day, the children all met
in the school auditorium for a brief farewell to the sixth graders who were
graduating to junior high school. Nurse Jackoby had ice cream bars as a
surprise for the entire wet set. She looked at them fondly, "I can't
exactly say hope to see you next year, can
I? But it’s been a good year, and you have all done well. Every one of you has
passed, she smiled at Jonathan, and Terry made the honor roll. Maybe one or two
of you won't need me next year - lets hope. But in any case, you're all my
special kids, and I hope that you stop by for frequent visits.”
Saturday afternoon was Jonathan’s first
game in the majors. He'd been looking forward too it all week. His new uniform
was hanging in the closet and he'd oiled his glove all week, working the
leather. He'd even wrapped a baseball in it and slept on it to get the pocket
'just right'. After lunch, he went upstairs with his father to get ready. After
Curley had changed his diapers, he pulled on the baseball pants. He'd never
worn a uniform before and he thought the short legs a bit odd. Unlike the real
major league uniforms these had elastic around the waist, but with the bright
blue shirt with gold trim and Burger King emblazoned on the back in letters of
the same color, he felt quite professional. He ran eagerly into the bathroom to
see what he looked like. To his dismay, the elastic around the waist and the
sharp taper of the trousers, which were designed to fit tightly around the
mid-calf, made his diapers bulge out. In fact, the general effect was not too
unlike that when he wore his superman flannel ski pajamas. He looked like a
toddler in a dress up baseball outfit!
Curley heard the groan from the bathroom.
Looking in the bathroom, he saw the distraught boy staring glumly at the
mirror. "Hmm. It won't be so bad if you pull your shirt tales out Jonathan
and let them hang down over your waist, a lot of the kids do anyway." He
walked over and helped him. "See, now it’s not so bad!"
"Its terrible!" Jonathan
moaned, “I look like a little kid." Curley had to admit that even with the
shirtails down it was plain to see that the kid was diapered. He also had to
admit that Jonathan did look quite a bit like a toddler dressed up in a toy
uniform. Secretly, he thought it looked really cute, but suppressed his grin
for Jonathan's benefit. "Its not how you look, Jonathan, its how you play."
He tried to be as convincing as possible."
When they got to the field, he felt like
everyone was staring at the boy in diapers. Worse, Tommy's little cousin Luke
was there and dressed up in a baseball outfit. The little three-year ran
straight over to him - "Thee - thee, I look just like Jonathan!" He
lisped. It was true and Jonathan could see a lot of barely suppressed smiles.
He was mortified when the boy kept following him around, and insisted on having
his picture taken with the older kid by Tommy's mother. Curley thought it was
pretty funny, and asked if he could have a copy. Jonathan wanted to kill Sarah
when she piped in and asked for one too. He glared at her, but she just
grinned, "You do look pretty cute Jonathan!"
Down on the field, he felt really
conspicuous. He was grateful that he was playing out in right field, far from
the stands. He ran out with the other kids on the team for warm-ups and tossed
a ball back and forth and caught pop flys from Curley. After they were all
called back in he headed for the dugout, but as he passed the other team
heading out for their warm-up, the kids started pointing to him and sniggering:
"Ha! Look at the baby - we're playing Baby Burger King - and there's their
baby boy." He didn't think it was very funny, and he could see that it
bothered his teammates. Two boys he sat down next to discreetly moved away from
him. Fortunately Sarah and Tommy took their place so he didn't feel so bad. The
game didn't go very well, the team kept getting razed by the Walters & Scranton Attorneys team:
"Baby-baby Burger King. Baby-baby Burger King!" And the flustered
Burger King players went 3 innings without a score, giving up three runs. This
was an important game and meant a lot, Walters and Scranton was in first place
and Burger King was one game behind. Jonathan could see that the opposing coach
was actually encouraging the razing, sometimes even leading the chant. He could
see his Dad looked disgusted. He felt awful.
Curley was strongly tempted to throttle
Lou Harrison. This had gotten out of hand. "The bastard," he thought,
"doesn't he give a damn about anything besides winning?" His glare
was answered by a smug look from the third base coach’s square where Lou was
urging on his runners. The fourth inning finally ended, again with no score for
Burger King, and Curley had to send in Jonathan for his innings. Curley had
hoped that they'd been on the boards by now. By luck of the rotation, Jonathan
was first at bat. He was terrified. He just stood there looking scared.
"Hey kid! Don't wet your
pants!" He couldn't believe that the other coach had said that. He glanced
back at his father - Curley looked like he was going to come across the field
from where he stood by third base. "Ball one!" He suddenly realized
that the pitcher had already thrown. He hadn't even seen it. He tried to pay
attention. "Baby - baby - baby. Baby’s going to wet his pants." They
chanted from the outfield. "Not going to - already has." - he thought
glumly. By now the terrified boy had already soaked his diapers. "Ball
two!" "Man! He thought, I gotta concentrate. He took a wild swing.
"Stree-rike one!" He groaned. "Ball three!" He prayed for a
walk. "Take your base." He sighed with relief, and headed out to first,
tossing the bat to the side, where the next batter retrieved it. Standing on
first, the boy there tried to distract him, commenting on his diapers.
Jonathan, however, had started to settle down and ignored him.
"Boy! Mr. Phillips, that was sure
lucky - they walked Jonathan, he would have been an easy out for sure. Mr.
Phillips chuckled, "Not surprising actually, their pitcher kept looking at
Jonathan's diapers instead of his strike zone. That's a help, but a walk won't
get us home here, we gotta get a run. Hop up; you’re next in the warm-up box. Tommy
strode out to the practice circle. He could see that the runner ahead of him
had also gotten a walk. Trying to pitch to a kid in diapers had really rattled
the 11 year old pitcher." He suddenly realized. "Hey!" He
shouted to Georgie Harrison, standing on the pitching mound, "If you can't
even strike out a baby, you're going to get creamed by me!" His teammates
caught on and started razing the pitcher. Lou Harrison yelled, "Shut up
and play ball!" from the opposing dugout. He looked angry, Tommy was pleased
to see. "Take your base!" He could see that it was working, Georgie
was really rattled, and now the bases were loaded - no outs. He strode up to
the plate. Firmed his feet in the turf, and grinned at Georgie - who glared
back. Wop! He nailed the ball and it sailed out. Curley motioned an eager Joey
to hold back on base. "Wait, it’s going to be caught. As soon as it hits
his glove - you tag up and then run for home." Out by the fence the ball
flew into the fielder’s mitt. Jonathan headed for home - his bench was cheering
as he slid in followed by the kid from second. The score was 2 to 3. He felt a
whole lot better as he headed back to the bench. His teammates grinned at him
"not bad for a bunch of babies - boy is that pitcher rattled," one of
the kids gloated. He finally felt like he belonged.
They got one more run and went into the
sixth and final inning with the game tied up 3-3. In the top of the sixth
Walters & Scranton got one run to go ahead. As luck would have it Jonathan
was last up to bat, with 2 outs and one boy on base. His teammates groaned.
They knew coach Curley never used pinch hitters, and besides Jonathan had to
play two full innings. Jonathan wasn't at all sure he wanted to go out to the
plate.
"Jonathan, tuck in your shirt."
"But Mr. Phillips! That'll really
make me look like a baby. Why?"
"Because,” Mr. Phillips grinned,
"that kid on the pitching mound will see nothing else - the more you look
like a baby - the more its going to rattle him. You'll get a walk or a candy
pitch for sure. Just keep cool and watch the ball. You'll do just fine."
Jonathan tucked his shirt in and headed
out to the plate. "Pretty cute baby pants!" The catcher sniggered.
The plate umpire told the kid to shut up or he'd be out. Jonathan realized that
the adults were rooting for him around the field. Lou Harrison hadn't caught
on, and kept making loud remarks about Jonathan's baby pants. Georgie Harrison
threw a wild pitch, and the runner on first made it to second. Rattled he threw
two more balls in succession. His father yelled at him to get control of
himself. He paused and carefully took aim and threw a gentle controlled pitch
right across the plate - he figured that pants wetter couldn't hit the ball
anyway. Swack! He stared in dismay as the ball sailed out over his head and the
outfield fence.
"I'll bet Jonathan's the first kid
to ever run the bases in soggy diapers," Tommy exulted in the car on the
way home. Jonathan blushed and grinned, "Well its lucky the game ended
when it did - I'm starting to leak!" "Oh-no you don't Jonathan - not
all over my car!" Curley tossed him a towel from the front seat. "You
should have seen Lou Harrison's face when that ball went over the fence. He was
screaming at Georgie when we left. Too bad. What a rotten coach. That, boys, is
how a real baby behaves."
School was out. When you're ten going on
11, that means lazy summer days with little to do, summer camp, or worse luck
summer school. Jonathan was not thrilled to hear that that he would be
attending the latter. Not one bit. Two months out the 12 short weeks of
vacation. His summer was ruined. He kicked at the lawn where he was sitting
having lunch with his parents. "Boy! some fun this summer gonna be!"
Curley just smiled: "I don't blame
you one little bit, but you've got a lot of catching up to do - or do you fancy
another year in fourth grade. All your grades were incompletes except for one,
and if you don't show that you can measure up in fifth - poof! Just like magic
you'll be a fourth grader again with all those little nine year olds, my soon
to be 11 son. Jonathan scowled and stuffed another mouthful of tuna salad
sandwich into his mouth. "Besides, look on the bright side, much to my
not-so-good friend Lou Harrison's dismay we tied for first place in the regular
season. Now we can battle it out in the play-offs. That's sure to make your
summer exciting - and who knows - maybe even the ten-year-old all-stars for
you. The latter Jonathan seriously doubted, but it was a nice thought, and he
really was looking forward to the play-offs. His mitt was all oiled and ready
for tomorrow’s game.
Tommy looked up; hey wanna go swimming
this afternoon. Jonathan thought about getting changed in the municipal
swimming pool locker room. "Nah!" "Oh you just don't want to
hafta change in front of a bunch of strange kids." "Well, I'll go if
you wear diapers too." That seemed to cool Tommy's jets a bit. The two
boy's looked glum - "What should we do dad?"
"How about an extra day of summer
school if you’re so bored?" His father cheerfully volunteered. "Very
funny Dad." "Well then, how about we launch the skiff down at the
lake, I finished it last night while you guys were asleep."
"Yeah!" The two boys cheered
simultaneously. "And we could take some fishing rods." Jonathan
added. "And we could go swimming!" Tommy piped in. So father and
son(s) headed off together with the boat tied precariously on top of the car to
a large lake about 30 minutes outside of Brookline.
They had a great afternoon. Improbably,
the caught a mess of bass, and both boys stripped down to diapers and had a
long swim. Jonathan allowed as how his needed a rinse anyway. In the water the
diapers felt real strange. "Not even I've gotten my diapers this wet
before!" He yelled to his friend. The two boys laughed cheerfully as the
water poured out of their sodden padding as they climbed out of the water.
"Boy are these heavy." They ran around in the sun on the beach of a
small cove where Curley had drawn up the boat, and drank sodas in the sun. Both
were a fair shade of pink by the time Curley had them put their shorts back
over their still sodden diapers. When they got back to the pier, both boys had
half moons of wet stain on the back of their shorts where the leg openings of
the plastic pants had leaked. Several older boys hanging around the dock made
caustic comments, but both Jonathan and Tommy were in too good spirits to be
embarrassed, and instead just laughed and said "You like em? We got an
extra couple of sets in the car, and we'll let you have the ones we got on."
The worst offender blushed a bit at this unexpected reply, but seeing Curley
coming up behind the boys decided to head off. By the time they'd gotten home,
both boys shorts, between the lake and the soda pop, were as soaked as the
diapers underneath. It was evident that neither of them minded one bit.
Dinner was fried fish. Tommy and Jonathan
got to stay up late, roasting marshmallows over the barbecue and telling ghost
stories. "Being able to really wet your pants at the scary parts really
added something,” Jonathan thought to himself. Curley wound up carrying both
upstairs to bed. In the morning both boys slept late.
A week later, with the round of playoff
games nearly complete, Burger King and Walters & Scranton were again tied
for first place. Tied in the best out of three series at the end, both teams
were nearly exhausted. Due to the rule that no kid could pitch more than six
innings in a week, Burger King had run out of pitchers, having played six tough
games in a week. Walters & Scranton was slightly better off, the tougher
teams in their playoff round having unexpectedly folded in two games too much
poorer teams. Georgie Harrison, their star pitcher still had two innings of
pitching left, and they had a full four innings of pitching left in two of
their backup pitchers.
Curley knew that Burger King's back was
to the wall, and from the way the other coaches were talking, so did they.
Conversation around the refreshment stand that morning, while the minor leagues
finished off their playoff, had not concerned itself very much with who was
going to finish up the winner this season, but more about who was likely to be
tough next season. Mentally he ran through his list of outfielders and basemen
trying to figure out just who might be able to pitch. He looked at his son -
Jonathan had an excellent arm for a ten year old, he was doing really well in
the minors - but pitching in the majors was an entirely different matter. If it
had been earlier in the season when he'd started, he would have had him pitch
the occasional inning just for this eventuality. It was the way he started all
his pitchers - unfortunately even Sarah who did an OK job of relief, was down
to three innings. That left him with no one else with an arm at all.
The game went improbably well. After 3
innings, they were actually ahead 1-0. Sarah had done remarkably well, and had
had some lucky outs. At the bottom of the 4th he sent in Mike, a 12 year old
playing his first and only year in the majors. The boy was strong - he just
prayed that he could get it over the plate. By the bottom of the 5th they were
down 1-4. When Mike hit a batter, he called over to Jonathan "Son get in
the Bull Pen and warm up with Tommy." It was only 5 minutes latter, after
Mike had nailed his second batter that a thoroughly stupefied Jonathan found
himself heading out to the pitchers mound. "They're gonna murder me for
sure!" He thought. "They've got some of the best batters in the
league, and Dad says just get it over the
plate. Boy!" He stood on the mound and looked at the first batter. The
boy grinned at him and took a few mean swipes at the plate. "That kids
staring at me like I'm the main course on his dinner menu." Just then he
heard Lou Harrison in the Walters & Scranton bullpen yell out "Hey!
They're gonna have Baby pitch. Baby Curley's gonna pitch." His team took
up the chant. "Hmm,” Jonathan said to himself. The razing for some reason
banished the butterflies from his stomach. He'd heard it before. He took a slow
wind up and aimed the ball for the catchers mitt. It sailed lazily through the
strike zone. Swap! The ball hit the ground near Jonathan's feet, bounced into
the air and went by the second baseman. Fortunately the middle fielder snagged
it and threw it hard to the plate, holding the lead runner on third. "Baby's
gonna pitch." He heard from the other dugout again. "That's getting
kinda boring," he said to himself looking down at the extra long tail of
his baseball shirt. He'd insisted that his Dad get him an extra large after his
first game. That made him think about how his diapers had really rattled the
Burger King pitcher that time. Nobody could see them now. He grinned. Set the
ball on the ground and slowly tucked the tails of the shirt into the elastic
waistband of his baseball pants. The batter was staring at the pitching mound.
"Yep! They bulge nicely, even out and down between my legs a bit." He
smiled at the batter, who was looking dumbfounded at the thick diapers on the
pitcher, and threw a pitch across the plate into the catcher’s glove. "Strike
one!"
After Jonathan retired the third batter
in a row, Burt Phillips was stunned: "How come we didn't know he could
pitch?" Curley who had instantly caught on to his son's little maneuver
chuckled: "He can't really, not at this level. He's got accuracy all
right, that's why he's getting strikes, but there isn't much speed there. Not
yet anyway. Their problem is they're to busy looking at his diapers to pay
attention to the ball.
The next two innings were good ones for
Burger King. Not only did Mike redeem himself by hitting his first and only
home run in Little League - bases loaded of course, but by the time Jonathan
retired his sixth straight batter in a row, he'd actually gained enough
confidence to find that he could put a little speed on the ball. He might have
actually struck out that last batter fairly.
Chapter
5
When Tobin Wheeler walked into his first
day of summer school, who should be seated in the desk next to him but Jonathan
Curley. The kid from Mrs. Hanlin's room who had to wear diapers all the time.
Tobin's heart pounded. He knew he was going to have a difficult time sitting by
Jonathan all summer. If people noticed him looking at his neighbor all the
time, everyone would think he was queer or something. He stared, fascinated, at
Jonathan's pants and wondered what it felt like to wear diapers all the time.
Real ones! Jonathan had let him feel them once through his plastic pants. He'd
been too scared to ever talk to him again, though he still lay awake at night
thinking about the way the plastic had felt over the wet diapers beneath. He
dreamed about being old enough to have his own apartment. Then he'd get real
diapers his size and wear them all the time in secret. Tobin knew just where he
could get them too - he'd seen them advertised in the Sears Catalogue. Also,
maybe he'd make a trip to another town and actually go into a medical supply
store and get some plastic pants. He'd seen them in Morgan's Medical Supply
last year when his mother and he had returned the crutches after he'd gotten
out of his cast when he broke his leg. He'd wanted to hang around, but couldn't
find any excuse, so had followed his mother promptly out of the store. The lady
at the other counter had seen him staring enthralled at the display while his
mother returned the crutches, and had given him a very knowing look. His heart
had nearly stopped. He was terrified that she had guessed his secret. He could
hear her telling everyone "Why that little boy wants to wear
diapers!"
He'd avoided going near that store ever
since, and when his mother had driven there to pick up a new steam kettle, he'd
stayed in the car and waited - just in case that lady was still there. So Tobin
had had to rely on folded up towels, and makeshift combinations of plastic from
old dry cleaning bags. Once he'd bought some gripper snaps at the 5&10, and
had used an old shower curtain to try and manufacture plastic pants. His
excitement making them was so great his hands had shook, but the results didn't
work at all, and he'd buried them in the backyard. Once, overnight at a
friend’s house, he'd snuck one of his friends little brothers diapers and wore
it stuffed under his underwear all night. He'd been both so excited, as well as
terrified that his friend would find out, or that his mother would notice it
was missing, that he hadn't slept a wink.
Jonathan couldn't help but notice over
the next week Tobin's constant infatuation and many guilty glances towards his
diapers. He was really curious about the kid. He seemed nice. Thus, he was
pleased that Tobin gradually got over (or used to) his nervousness about being
around Jonathan. As Tobin gradually realized that his careful avoidance of the
boy sitting next to him was attracting more attention than actually talking to
him or going out to recess with him occasionally, he gradually warmed up.
Eventually Jonathan asked him if he'd like to come over and play, and maybe
spend the night since his friend Tommy was out of town visiting his
grandparents.
Tobin wanted to accept so bad that he
thought he was going to wet his pants right there, but he was so scared, that
at first he refused, but when Jonathan pressed "Hey you bothered about
spending the night at my house cause I wear diapers?" He didn't want to
admit that either, and had finally accepted. When the day came he was intensely
excited. He was going to spend the night at home with a boy who not only wet
his bed every night, but also wore diapers all the time. He couldn't wait to
see what Jonathan looked like in his pajamas. Tobin lay awake half the night
before he was to go over, imagining what Jonathan looked like when he went to
bed, and fantasizing about seeing him getting changed. In all his fantasies
somehow he always wound up taking Jonathan's place. He even thought about
telling Jonathan's mother that he still wet the bed in hopes that she would
insist that he too be diapered for the night. The thought made him shudder with
anticipation, though he knew he'd never get up the courage to do it.
His worst fear was that Jonathan's mother
might talk about it to his, and boy would he be in for it then. He remembered
still the time his mother had caught him when he was seven playing with an old
pair of diapers from the dustbin. He'd pinned them on with a couple of small
safety pins from his mother's sewing kit - they didn't work very well - and had
wet the diaper. Because he didn't have plastic pants he was doing this little
experiment in the bathtub, and there was a little trail of pee running from
between his legs onto the white enamel of the bathtub from where it made a
little yellow stream to the drain. He'd tried sitting in it once or twice to
soak it back up cause he wanted it all to be in his diaper, but it just ran
back down his legs or dripped from the diaper back into the bathtub. When his
mother walked in on him, she'd been extremely angry, she'd yanked the diaper
off him and given him a hard spanking right on his wet butt. It hurt like hell.
Then she'd given him a long lecture about what a disgusting thing it was he'd
done, winding up telling him that only babies wore diapers - not boys - and
that if she ever caught him doing it again he'd get a belt spanking. All the
old diapers that had been set aside for cleaning rags had gone into the trash
that same day.
He didn't know why he liked diapers, or
why he wanted to wet them, or even sometimes mess in them (he only whispered
this even in his thoughts) but the compulsion was intense and undeniable. Every
time he saw a toddler in diapers, the 11-year-old boy got a boner.
So when Friday afternoon Jonathan's mother
picked them both up from school for the weekend, he was nearly beside himself
with anticipation and fear. On arriving at Jonathan's house, the first thing to
happen was Jonathan's mother asking her son if he needed a change. Tobin hung
back when the two of them headed upstairs; he was dying to follow them, but
figured he'd hardly be welcome at this little soiree.
"Tobin, you might as well bring your
bag on up to Jonathan's room and settle in while I change him. No point in your
just hanging around downstairs."
"Err - ah - OK." Tobin,
surprised, eagerly headed up to Jonathan's room carrying his overnight bag.
Jonathan and his mother, whom Jonathan had fully briefed on his suspicions
about Tobin, exchange smiles at Tobin's obvious confusion and guilty look. They
both waited until Tobin entered, and then, as the wide-eyed boy gaped at the
changing table, with its pile of neatly folded diapers and plastic pants on the
shelf beneath, proceeded to explain it's function in detail. Tobin was riveted.
He couldn't have moved from the spot by the changing table where they'd
maneuvered him if the house had burned down. He watched with intense interest
as Jonathan's pants were pulled down, and the plastic baby pants were stripped
off.
"Here, Tobin, would you hold these
for me while I get Jonathan's wet dipes off." Kate handed the plastic
pants, smelling faintly of Jonathan's urine to the dumbfounded boy. She smiled
as he took them from her like they were the crown jewels. His face flushed with
excitement as he looked at them and his fingers moved lovingly over them
feeling their texture. "From the way he's looking at Jonathan's baby
pants," she thought to herself, "Its a miracle he hasn't passed out.
Jonathan sure got his number right." As she unpinned Jonathan, washed and
oiled him, and finally pinned him back up, Tobin stared in unconcealed
fascination.
In his wildest fantasies Tobin had never
imagined that he would actually get to see a kid his own age being diapered,
much less get to hold a pair of real plastic pants his own size that were going
to be put on the boy right in front of him! Jonathan's mother, highly amused,
had to actually tug at the plastic pants to get the dazed boy to release his
grip. When Jonathan was back down from the table, he looked at his mother:
"Its real hot today Mom, would it be OK if I just wore diapers and plastic
pants." Tobin almost did pass out.
Tobin was even more startled when they
were playing in the backyard, and the old lady next door greeted Jonathan as
though he were wearing nothing at all unusual. She and Jonathan had chatted
briefly, Jonathan completely unfazed at being see by his neighbor wearing
nothing but diapers and plastic pants. Jonathan, for his part was thoroughly
enjoying himself, and made a point of hamming up his diapers, poking out his
fanny and walking around to the front of the house and in the front door. Every
kid and adult on the street already knew he had to wear diapers, and had seen
him in them, so he wasn't in the slightest bothered about being seen wearing
them in his parents yard. Tobin's reaction was one of dumbstruck amazement. He
acted as though he was being dragged out in diapers in front of the world.
Jonathan figured that Tobin didn't even know that there were other kids just
like him, and that he wasn't alone. In his situation, Jonathan could understand
that in Tobin's shoes he would probably have died before doing anything that
would let anybody know he was interested in diapers.
Jonathan figured it was time to let his
new friend in on the secret. He and his parents had discussed how they should
do this in detail. Arriving back up in his room, Jonathan suggested that they
play with the new Leggo set that he'd been given for his birthday the week
before. In pulling it out of the closet, he sort of accidentally also pulled
down a diaper cover that he'd placed there for that specific purpose earlier.
It was made like a little pair of Levi shorts from dark blue denim cloth, with
a big cross-stitched pocket at the back; but with elastic around the waist and
leg holes and a plastic lining. He picked them up and handed them casually to
Tobin to put back on the shelf, while he opened the Leggo box.
"Th-these are baby pants! You don't
really wear these do you?" Jonathan looked at him with a look of total innocence:
"Sure." He reached over and took them back from the dazed boy, bent
over and stepping into the leg openings, he pulled them up over his plastic
pants and diapers. Jonathan stood there in a little denim diaper cover would
have charmed the socks off any diaper boy's heart. For Tobin, it was
overwhelming. Jonathan enjoyed the stunned expression on his friends face; he
could also see the obvious reaction in his friend’s shorts as well. "I
think they make me look like a real little kid - don't you? Actually I don't
wear these all that often, I'm not really into baby clothes nearly as much as
Tommy is. His mother gave them to me along with some Leggo for my birthday -
she thinks that every kid that likes diapers also likes baby clothes as much as
Tommy does."
"Y-you mean that there are other
kids who like to wear diapers too!" Tobin hadn't meant to add that
"too' - he realized belatedly. "Sure! Me and Tommy, - and my Dad too
a bit when he was a little boy. Dad's told me all about a club in California
just for people who like to wear diapers. Most of them don't even need
to."
"Geee!" Tobin face showed a
cascade of emotions - principle among them overwhelming relief. He also looked
totally flustered. "You know, I ah - never told anybody this before, but
ah - well you know." He turned beet red. "Yeah! I do - ever since
that day in the gym - remember?" Jonathan replied straightforwardly. Tobin
had hoped that Jonathan would of thought he was just curious, - he hadn't
counted on that boner. "My mother knows too - and she won't tell anyone -
that's a promise." Jonathan was sure his friend was going to keel over he
look so stunned by these revelations. "She even said it was alright with
her if you'd like to wear them to bed tonight."
Tobin was overwhelmed. Jonathan was
startled to see tears running down his face. "She - you won't really tell
anybody." All of a sudden the greatest fear of the boy's life had been
exposed. He was scared. At the same time he felt an incredible weight lift
almost physically from his body. Overwhelmed, he actually broke down and cried.
Jonathan's mother, hearing Tobin from the stairs where she was carrying up a
load of laundry, hurried into the room, a look of deep concern on her face. She
reached out and took Tobin in her arms, and as the boy sobbed, she patted him
gently on the back. "What did you do?" She looked sharply at
Jonathan, "nothing." he shrugged, I just told him about all us kids
who like to wear diapers, and that we'd figured out that he wanted to too. I
told him we wouldn't tell anyone."
"I-I'm sorry," the boy in her
arms gasped out, "I've been so scared and everything. Y-y-you really
w-won't tell on me? My mother said she'd kill me if she ever caught me in
diapers again. She caught me once playing with them when I was little and I got
punished real bad." Kate looked down at the gasping terrified boy.
"This is a lot more than we bargained for," she thought to herself.
She'd never realized how terrible a secret like this could be for a child.
"It's alright dear, now you have a place you can go where everyone knows,
and its safe. We can talk all about it, and we won't breathe a word to anyone.
Besides, everyone around here likes you, you’re a good boy, and we hope you'll
like us."
Gradually Tobin calmed down, and as he
did so, he began to feel really excited. They'd really let him wear diapers
here! He thought. "Jonathan said that I could wear diapers to bed if I
wanted to?" "Of course you can dear, I think you'll look really cute
in them, and I bet they'd feel really good too! We know you don't wet the bed
ordinarily, but it would be perfectly alright if they just happened to get wet
overnight. In fact, I think Jonathan would be disappointed if they weren't: he
always appreciates a little company in the morning. Actually, you don't have to
wait until this evening, if you want, I can diaper you right now. You'd really
like that, wouldn't you?"
Tobin's nod was almost imperceptible, but
the next thing he knew he was lifted gently up onto the same changing table
where he'd seen Jonathan only an hour before, and his shorts were being pulled
down. It was like he was floating in a dream. He would never forget how
wonderful it felt the first time after all those years of waiting. When he was
lifted back down to the ground, he looked up at her shyly, "Th-thanks Mrs.
Curley."
"As long as we're on such intimate
terms, why don't you just call me Aunt Kate, like Tommy does when he's
here."
"O-OK Aunt Kate." the boy
finally smiled, and his whole face seemed to open up, infused with joy.
"Why don't you go with Jonathan and
look at yourself in the bathroom mirror?" she said.
"He and Jonathan ran across the
hall, and he stood in wonderment looking at himself. He turned sideways. He
turned backwards. He bent over and looked at his reflection through his legs.
He loved the way he looked. "They were real! He was really wearing
diapers! Baby diapers! And real baby pants!" "Neat! Aren't they”?
Jonathan said. Even he was impressed by how happy his friend was.
"Not neat - wonderful!" the boy
said turning backwards and forwards to look at his reflection. "I could
stand here forever," he thought. He looked at the way the diapers bunched
and hung down between his legs, and felt a little shudder of pleasure go
through him as he squeezed his legs together and felt their thickness in his
crotch.
"You can wet them anytime you
like." Jonathan said.
"He looked in the mirror, at first a
little shy - he'd never thought about doing this in front of other people. He
always figured that it would be in secret. He didn't want to wait." Both
boys's watched intently as the dark stain appeared under the boys cloudy white
plastic pants. Tobin could feel the wet wonderful warmth of it as it spread out
in front and then was drawn down into his crotch between his legs. He gave an
enormous sigh of pure pleasure.
"C'mon, lets show mother!"
"S-show your m-mother?"
"C'mon silly, she'll be pleased to
see that you've wet them already. Besides you won't have to take them off for
quite a while anyway cause babies and toddlers are really wet most of the time.
Nobody changes kids diapers until they’re really wet."
Somehow, Tobin found himself standing in
front of Mrs. Curley. She looked down at his diapers and smiled at him gently,
"that’s nice Tobin, I'm glad you were brave enough to wet them so soon and
show me. They feel nice that way don't they?" Tobin nodded shyly.
"Well whenever you feel like a change - or if you begin to leak, you come
to me or Mr. Curley when he's here and we'll give you a nice dry pair. Besides,
we always enjoy seeing a boy in wet diapers." Somehow, he realized, he'd
come home, he felt like this was the way he belonged. He thought he'd never
been so happy in his entire life.
When Curley arrived home his enthusiastic
son at the door greeted him and, he was pleased to see, a second diapered boy
tagging along behind somewhat timidly. "Well! How's my little pants wetter
today. I see you've got a friend!" He smiled at Tobin, hoisted Jonathan up
for a hug, patted his wet little bottom, and set him down. Come over here and
let me see you, I've heard a lot about you young Tobin." Tobin sheepishly
went and stood in front of Mr. Curley, intensely feeling the Jonathan's
father's gaze go over his nearly naked body and linger on his thickly diapered
bottom. "From the way those are hanging, I'd say you were one wet little
hombre! I'll bet those feel good - don't they?" The boy nodded his head.
"I would also say that both you cowboys are starting to leak a bit. What's
been going on around here - a wetting contest"?
Jonathan giggled. That was exactly what
they'd been doing. They'd trooped into the kitchen 3 or 4 times for glasses of
milk, and had each gone and drunk directly from the tap at the bathroom sink
equally as many times. They'd decided they'd see who could get the wettest
before Jonathan's Dad came home. Kate had been greatly amused by the whole
performance and the rather ineffective innocent looks the boys tried to put on
whenever they'd headed towards bathroom or kitchen. She'd called a halt to the
milk part of the routine once she caught on to what they were up to, but saw no
particular harm in their continuing their game via the kitchen and bathroom
faucet.
The two boys slogged upstairs, their
soaking diapers squishing between their legs as they walked, and Curley kidding
them all the way. After he'd been "outfitted in new duds" Tobin
decided that Jonathan had a really neat dad. Curley had changed them both
standing in the bathtub.
By the end of the summer Tobin was a
regular visitor to the Curley household, and frequently stayed the night.
Tommy's mother was working late as a waitress Friday and Saturday nights and
the Curley's were charmed to have him as a regular resident on the weekends as
well. At first, Tobin would take the guest bedroom, but since he'd rather be
with the other boys, he eventually moved onto Jonathan's floor in a sleeping
bag. After a while, he would just share the upper bunk with Tommy. It seemed
convenient, and neither boy seemed to mind. Curley often joked how he couldn't
see how they could fit all those diapers into one small bunk bed
"Jonathan, you better hope they don't spring a leak up there. You could
wind up getting washed down the hall."
As it turned out, Tobin had an affection
for baby clothes that rivaled Tommy's. Since Tobin's mother knew nothing about
this whole affair, he shared Tommy's baby wear at first, but eventually Kate
made him a few outfits and onesies of his own. Jonathan was less interested in
baby things than his two friends, but would wear his snap-waisted footed sleeper.
Generally, he saw himself as an older kid who had to wear diapers. As he grew
older he would come to have a fantasy where he was the age he first came to the
Curley's - maybe a year or two younger, who was dressed as a little boy cause
he needed diapers.
By Christmas of that year, the school
moved him up to the sixth grade. His progress had astounded the teachers. More
and more they came to recognize him as one of their brightest pupils. Jonathan
had been elated. As it turned out, he greatly missed his friend Sarah in class,
and a few strings were pulled so that he could be in the same room. Sarah for
her part never stopped coming over after school to play. As time went on she
and Jonathan, except for normal spats between adolescents, developed a deep
friendship. It became a standard joke between the two families that you always
got two for the price of one. It wasn't at all unusual to see Sarah playing
catch in the Curley's backyard with three boys in diapers and plastic pants.
She still loved to see them dressed that way, and by that time they'd become
entirely accustomed to her being around when they played baby.
Curley and Kate found that they developed
quite an affection for little Tobin. He was always small for his age, and in
many ways reminded them more of little Billy than either Tommy or Jonathan.
Jonathan was rapidly growing into an independent young man, full of
self-confidence, with a growing circle of friends. Not only didn't Tobin have
as large a circle of friends, it didn't extend much beyond Sarah, Tommy and
Jonathan, but he seemed to need more attention from the two of them. It was not
unusual, when Tommy wasn't around for Tobin to hang around Curley, while
Jonathan and Sarah were charging off by themselves somewhere.
"You know Curley, I'm concerned
about Tobin. I don't think it's normal for a boy of 12 to want to hang around
with adults so much. He always seems so happy to get over here, but he seems
sad and moody a lot of the time. He spends so much time over here; I'm amazed
that his parents don't object. I'm also surprised that Jonathan or Tommy have
never been invited to his house."
Their puzzlement was short-lived. Curley
was called down to assist in an arrest at the shopping mall a mile from their
house. A boy had thrown rocks through 3 huge plate-glass windows. When he
pulled up in his patrol car, there was little Tobin sitting motionless in the
back of the arresting officers car. Curley was stunned. He asked the other
officer to let him take the boy to the station. On the way he knew better than
to chew the boy out. Tobin's attitude was strange - one of resignation, almost
relief. Moreover, the arresting officer had been baffled as well. "He just
walked up and threw rocks at the windows in front of a group of passerby's. When
I got here he was just standing in front of the store waiting. It looks like he
wanted to be arrested."
"Tobin, do you want to tell me why
you broke those windows." Curley asked. It took some time for Curley, and
eventually the social worker to piece together what was going on. Tobin's
father had taken off when he was 8. Up until then he'd had a pretty normal
childhood, but afterward, as her only child, the boy became the focus of his
mother's attention. He was her golden child. Shortly after he first came to the
Curley's, however, her mother started dating Mark Brass, the manager, it turned
out, of the store that Tobin had vandalized. After a short courtship, Tobin's
mother had remarried. Tobin's life underwent a rather abrupt turn. While Mark
now became the focus of his mother's life, displacing him, Mark showed
absolutely no interest in Tobin. Rejecting an early advanced on Tobin's part,
he had bluntly told Tobin: "I'm not your father, we're totally unrelated,
we just live in the same house, and I don't want you to call me Dad or Father
ever. I'm not, and I'm not going to be." Worse, Mark made it clear to
Tobin's mother that he didn't want the boy around when he was home. "I
don't like that kid hanging around staring at me. He gets on my nerves."
Strangely, his mother reacted by following suite. Tobin was told that, except
at dinnertime, he could stay in his room, or he could be outside. Otherwise
everything in the house was off-limits besides the extra bathroom. When the new
baby came, Tobin was told to stay out of its room. Both parents fussed over the
baby interminably. Endless pictures; the family Christmas card with the baby
and his parents didn't include Tobin; visits to relatives with the baby and
Tobin left behind; his birthday came and passed - no one even remarked on it.
Tobin had become an unwelcome border in his own home.
Tobin was desperate. He couldn't bring
himself to tell anyone what was occurring - he really didn't quite understand
what was happening to him anyway. "It's pretty simple," the court
psychiatrist had said, "the boy was in an intolerable situation, and the
misery was so intense that he couldn't bear it anymore. When he broke those
windows, he was simply asking for somebody to get him out of it. Breaking the
windows of his so-called stepfather's store simply guaranteed that he wouldn't
be going back to his old home. The fact that the miserable bastard would have
to pay the $3500 for them was just a plus."
Tobin's stepfather made it clear, that,
far from asking for leniency from the court for Tobin, his parents wanted him
to be prosecuted to the full. The stepfather also wasted no time in telling
Tobin that he wasn't coming back home. The mother went along with Mark, with
astoundingly little concern as far as the social worker was concerned. "A
totally dysfunctional parent - children are simply toys you play with, and when
you get bored, or it gets broke, or you don't want it anymore, you toss it
away. If I had my way, I'd get the other child out of the house too. That's why
she married Brass in the first place - they're two peas in a pod. Mark wanted
nothing to do with Tobin because he was some other man's toy - not his."
Mark Brass got his way. Tobin was given
the works. To Mark's chagrin, however, he found that Judge Moore had chosen a
rarely used option of a rather heavy fine, instead of a sentence to Juvenile
Detention - in addition to restitution to the store - which he levied against
the parents. The court had hardly been impressed by the parents behavior, and
rightly figured the punishment belonged where the blame was. Not only the
parents refusing to accept any compromises on Tobin's behalf, but Mark's egging
the store owners into demanding prosecution of a young juvenile first offender
had bothered even the prosecutor. In fact, Tobin's conviction was a
technicality, both prosecutor and the court appointed defense attorney
basically putting the parents on trial instead - they had walked out toward the
end. The judge, sympathetically - but gravely, assured the boy that if he stayed
out of any more trouble for the next three years his record would be expunged.
The state taking Tobin was simply a
formality, completed shortly after the trial. Since Tobin was a ward of the
court, on probation - but technically only living at the JDC before foster
placement, he was allowed to visit the Curley's whenever they invited him. At
Jonathan's suggestion, who'd been horror struck by the whole affair - it
touched some very deep old wounds, the arrangement became permanent. "And
after all, Tobin's only 11 so he'd be my younger brother."
"Hold it right there young man, just
who do you think gets to adopt him anyway? You or us? Weeell fight'cha for
him!" He said grinning at Tobin who'd been sitting on the edge of his seat
throughout Jonathan's entire rendition (The whole proposal had been a
conspiracy planned between them). "How about we all adopt him then?"
Jonathan grinned back. "OK. Tobin,” Curly said with a grand air,
"consider yourself adopted."
Kate was a good sport about the extra
laundry. Actually the diapers started to tail off. The effects of Jonathan's
treatment were slowly healing after all, and he had an increasing degree of
control during the daytime. He even found himself sleeping through the night to
wake up dry in the morning. Though he'd often lie in bed and wet them anyway,
during the day he tended to keep his pants dry just to keep the rash down. When
he moved on to Junior high that year, he went back to the training pants
abandoned earlier - with the addition of plastic pants. He was getting older,
and more self conscious about strange adults seeing him naked, and while
getting changed by Sarah's mother at elementary school had been OK, he'd hadn't
wanted to be changed or seen naked by some new lady. Diapers at night, however,
lasted for a considerable time, even after he really was dry most of the time.
The changing table eventually moved into Tobin’s room, but a few diapers
remained in his bottom bureau drawer for those "special times". Right
up till he headed off for college, if there was a lot of stress at school, on
the playing field, or if adolescence just got him down, he'd spend a night, or
a day, or a weekend running around the house in diapers.
Tobin moved into his own room at the
Curley's, and Tommy opted to stay there when he spent the night on weekends.
Both wore diapers to bed every night by choice, a decision that they saw as
permanent. Their wardrobe of baby clothes expanded, as did their interest, if
that was possible, on through through puberty. The two boys spent hours playing
together in their baby outfits. They particularly liked playing around with
baby toys in the bathtub together. Sarah and Jonathan took to referring to his
room as the baby clubhouse, due to the rather unusual decor for a 14 year old,
and the odd clothing that was always left around. Kate despaired of every
getting that boy to keep his room neat. Tobin remained an average student,
though Tommy did a little better.
By the time Tobin turned 14, both Kate
and Curley began to notice that Tobin and Tommy were becoming more and more
inseparable. "The two of them are just like Jonathan and Sarah," Kate
wryly observed one day. The casual remark suddenly had them both looking at
each other. "You know Kate, both those boys fathers deserted them, and
both had domineering mothers for quite a while. Maybe we aren't seeing the
obvious?" It had bothered Curley when he'd found the two fourteen year
olds sharing the shower one night. "Aren't you two a little old to be
bathing together?"
From the day the two boys had laid eyes
on each other they'd been mutually fascinated. Tobin thought Tommy was the
neatest, and Tommy had thought his somewhat smaller friend the cutest kid he'd
ever seen. Tobin had always had an appreciative audience at his diaper changes
in Tommy. Boys that age are not interested in girls at all, but are generally
interested in each other. Neither boy had seen much different in the way they
looked at each other from the way their friends acted. It was only now that
they were beginning to realize that their interests weren't quite the same as
their friends anymore. "I don't know why all those guys can talk about
anymore are those dumb girls. Hey did you check out the Bryan Moore - he's
quite a hunk." Somehow they'd begun to realize that the other kids
wouldn't be interested, but since they were so close, it never occurred to them
not to talk the way they felt to each other.
Neither wanted to think of himself as
different from the rest of the guys, and they tended to think of themselves as
"just not ready for girls yet." Hadn't that been what Tommy's
grandfather had said to them last year anyway. The diaper games they played
became increasingly affectionate, and Tommy would often come down to the lower
bunk in the mornings for a tickle fight, which often turned into them rubbing
themselves through their diapers against the mattress side by side. Eventually
the game proved to be more exciting if they did it against each other’s diapers
instead of the mattress. Changing each other was a new game they also enjoyed.
They justified it on the grounds that they didn't want to bother Kate, but the
amount of time spent with the bottle of baby oil was considerably more than
required. The boys discovered that it was just nice to lie in bed together, and
Tommy would often climb down in the middle of the night. Thus, it was that Kate
found them sound asleep with their arms around each other one morning. She
tiptoed out.
"Curley, I don't think we should
just ignore Tommy and Tobin anymore." Curley sighed, "I know, but I've
had a little bit of trouble accepting it, and now I'm trying to figure out how
to deal with it. I guess what you saw this morning kinda eliminates any doubts.
Boy! My old man would have had a stroke. What do you think we ought to tell
Jonathan."
"I think that he should know the
truth - but we better find out what that is before we tell him anything."
Thus, it was that about a month latter
Curley had a chat with his youngest son. They were driving up to a baseball
tournament together that Jonathan's freshman baseball team was playing in New
Hampshire. It was a three-hour drive, Jonathan had gone up in the team bus, and
there was plenty of time for a long quiet talk about the world.
"You really like Tommy a lot, don't
you son?"
"Sure. He's my best friend."
"You know Tobin, my best friend is
your mother?" He smiled. "When we're together, it just feels right.
You know I just love lying there in bed with her - not doing anything - just
lying there. You ever feel that way about Tommy."
"Yeah. Sometimes. I guess so? Why?
Shouldn't I feel that way about him?" Tobin was suddenly growing
suspicious. He had a funny cold feeling in his stomach that something was wrong
with him.
"No, actually Tobin I think it's
pretty natural for you to feel that way about Tommy."
"Oh." The boy said obviously
relieved.
"Have you noticed how Jonathan and
Sarah have been acting lately?"
"Yeah! Kinda goofy. They are always
sneaking off and hugging and kissing each other."
"Sorta reminds me of you and Tommy a
bit - whata ya think?"
"Well - sorta I suppose."
"You known Sarah's really Jonathan's
girlfriend now so that's pretty natural too. Seems to me just like you and
Tommy."
"Tommy can't be my girlfriend -
that's silly."
"Not really - lots of boys have
boyfriends just like lots of boys have girl friends."
"Is that really true Dad? - Isn’t
that - I mean aren't guys like that ah - " Tobin was suddenly realizing
where this conversation was going, and he looked extremely worried and was
obviously getting upset.
"Well, some people do call boys and
men like that names, but generally we refer to them as gay. People only do that
cause they're different. But really different isn't bad - it's just different.
And there are just as many nice gay people as there are straight people."
"What if I'm gay - would that be
bad?"
"Tobin I love you, your mother loves
you and Jonathan loves you. Just as you are. It doesn't matter to us whether
you're gay or your straight. For that matter we really love Tommy too, he's
more or less been our foster son for 5 years now. Whether you're really gay or
straight is something that you can't fully know for many years. It isn't very
simple actually; a lot of people, including many gays tend to stereotype
themselves as totally gay or totally straight. In truth, most people can have
sexual feelings and attachments to members of both sexes. For the majority of
people, these feelings are strongest towards members of the opposite sex. This
is reasonable because that’s where kids come from and our species survives. At
the same time, however, it is not unusual for a straight to have deep affection
for another guy, and this sometimes becomes a relationship that extends far
beyond simple friendship. In some cases a largely straight man or boy may find
that he is strongly attracted to a specific individual of the same sex. He may
even live a gay lifestyle for a while. I would think the reverse is probably
true for many gays as well. Most boys go through a period of homoeroticism when
they grow up, usually just before and during puberty. In more relaxed cultures
it's perfectly normal for boys to be seen holding hands or even kissing. For
many, if not most boys, their first sexual experience is with another boy, this
may be no more than beating off together or it can go as far as making love
like a man and a woman. Truth is, my best friend and I did a lot of
experimenting together when we were 12 and 13. It was fun and we both found it
exciting, but as we grew older we simply got more interested in girls."
"You did?"
"Sure. You’re the only one I've ever
told though. I thought I should share it with you so you'd know that I
understand your feelings about Tommy. Your mother and I have discussed this
whole thing quite a bit. We feel that you and Tommy have a lot in common: and just
like we approve of Sarah and Jonathan's relationship, we approve of yours too.
So Tommy is welcome anytime, and he can still spend the night in your
room."
But there are things I want you to
remember, the first is that you should not stereotype yourself as an
individual. Always be open to new possibilities in life. It is entirely
possible that your relationship with Tommy may last a lifetime, on the other
hand, as you get older it may turn to friendship instead and you will find a
relationship with another man or woman. Don't be down on yourself because
you're different. Except yourself as you are - not as others tell you you
should be. Just remember that the most important thing in life - is to have
someone to share it with, and if that's another guy - so be it."
Curley noticed that Tobin was starting to
get a little bored with the lecturing at this point. It was time to add the
extra kicker. "How would you like to take Karate?" Tobin's interested
perked right up: "Wow! You serious?" "Sure am, your mother and I
thought we'd give you and Tommy lesson's for late birthday presents."
Tobin and Tommy, who'd avoided team
sports like the plague, took to karate like fish to water. Everybody in the
house got a little tired of karate this and karate that. When Halloween
arrived, the two boys announced that they were going to go trick or treating
for UNICEF instead of candy that year cause they were getting too old for
regular trick'r treat. This made the Curley's wonder if the two boys were
loosing their baby interests. They needn't have worried. "Hah!" Tobin
shouted, striking his best karate pose. "Eee-Ya!" Yelled Tommy,
dancing around doing a series of hand movements and kicks. The boys were
dressed as Mutant Teenage Ninja Turtles - more or less - with plastic masks and
torsos, headbands and various strange eastern karate weapons. The effect on the
two 14 year olds could not be fully appreciated without, however, noting the
kelly green died diapers and plastic pants. "Mutant Baby Ninja
Turtles!" Jonathan squawked laughing uncontrollably. "Wrong again! -
Round eye!" The two boys responded, pointing to their pink headbands
"We're Gay Mutant Baby Ninja Turtles." They had a great time parading
around the neighborhood. The parents thought they were hysterical, and a lot of
little kids kept asking: "Are those REAL
diapers?"
One weekend, shortly after Jonathan's 15th
birthday,
Sarah was over and the two of them were upstairs in his room. Jonathan was in
diapers when Sarah arrived. They were petting on the bed, an occupation that
had started the year before. Both the Curleys and the Jackobys had made a point
over the years of providing them with a steady stream of reliable information
on their sexuality - in small doses, and never made much of a deal out of it.
When it had become obvious that the two were getting to be a whole lot more
than friends, both parents had sat them down and had laid down the law. They
could have their privacy - so long as intercourse remained off limits. Anything
else was their concern, though they were expected to be discrete. Both children
had readily agreed. Sarah had discovered that they were both aroused by the
mention of Jonathan's diapers, and they had taken to appearing on Jonathan,
when his parents weren't around, whenever she came over. Today was a little
different in that he actually hadn't expected her - he'd just been in the mood
for diapers.
"My goodness!" Sarah exclaimed
sliding her hand down the front of Jonathan's diapers, "aren't we wet
today!" Jonathan looked embarrassed. "Maybe mommy ought to change her
little boy?" Jonathan looked startled; his mother rarely did that for him
anymore, now that he really didn't need them. In fact, it had been quite a
while. He didn't have much time to agree or disagree because Sarah was already
unbuckling his trousers - she at least had no intention of "letting her
little boy stay in those wet diapers." "My! Jonathan's little thing
is poking way up in the air." She teased. "I think mommy can make it
feel nice and good - we don't want little Jonathan to get any diaper rash do
we?" She rubbed baby oil on him, enjoying the feel of his strong member in
her hand, and then moved down and oiled his balls. Tickling him a little bit
between the legs, she had him roll over so she could do his fanny - adding a
back rub in for good measure, and then poured extra oil all over his
"little pink hole” and rubbing it in. By the time she'd pulled the diapers
between his legs, Jonathan was squirming with pleasure, and after he was
diapered up she put her hand back down and gave him release into the flannel.
"Soo convenient, mommy can wait to clean up her little boy while her
little boy makes mommy feel good."
Jonathan smiled sweetly, "Maybe
mommy wants to be Jonathan's little girl for a little while?" Sarah looked
even more startled than Jonathan. Jonathan's hand was already stroking her
between the legs, but to her surprise the implicit suggestion made waves of
pleasure surge through her at his touch. Jonathan noted the change and grinned
at his blushing girlfriend. "Goodness, what do you know! After all these
years! I thought you just liked to look at little boys in diapers - I didn't
know you were jealous too!" Neither had Sarah. Jonathan's performance
rivaled Sarah's, and spent, the two of them had lain there in each others arms
for over an hour when he suddenly noticed a rather guilty look on her face.
"Hmm!" he looked her in the eye, "My little girl doesn't need a
change does she?" Sarah blushed again, "I always did wonder what it
felt like." The changing routine was just as fun the second time.
After that diapers became a standard part
of their routine. Sarah never wore them much other than when they were on, and
eventually, in bed together. One such afternoon they were both lying naked on
Sarah's bed. Her parents had gone for the weekend with the other children and
she was home alone. She was gently stroking Jonathan's member and teasing him.
"My what a hairy big pole for such a little little boy. It sure was a lot
smoother the first time I saw it." Jonathan did blush at that particular
memory. "That was really rotten of you - you know - it was really
humiliating having you there when mom cleaned me up." She grinned, "I
know. But I wouldn't have missed it for the world. Besides, it was the only time
I ever got to see you when you were really a little boy. You looked really cute
with your smooth little peter. I thought it looked very nice, and it still
turns me on just to think about it. You don't look very much like a little boy
now - I'm afraid."
"Yeh. I know." He smiled
wistfully, "sometimes I kinda wish all that fur had never grown, I
sometimes imagine what it would be like to be that way again. For that matter,
I never got to see you that way at all - not very fair."
"You really want to see me
smooth?"
"I guess I would. Besides I bet it'd
make diapering you a whole lot more fun."
Sarah grinned wickedly, jumped up and
left the room, to return a few minutes later holding a pair of electric
clippers in her hand. "They're really for clipping our dog, but I'm sure they'll
work just fine on us."
"Us?"
"Us." she said pushing him back
on the bed, "you get to see me - I get to see you. Fair and square baby
buddy boy of mine."
Jonathan didn't look to sure about this,
and felt a little panic. "I wonder how long it'll take to grow back?"
He thought to himself. He didn't have much choice since Sarah had quickly
plugged in the clippers while she straddled him. She grinned as his penis shot
up into the air as the fur started to fly. Afterwards she spent a long time oiling
him. He returned the favor. "Now you really look like a little boy!"
She smiled as she diapered him up a little later. She kinda liked the way she
looked too. Jonathan never did get to find out exactly "how long it would
take to grow back." In fact, he started to wear trainers again - it was
pretty chilly down there in the winter with the fur gone.
The last time Jonathan's mother changed
him was shortly thereafter. "Sarah's idea or yours?" She smiled
gently. "Well kinda both of ours. I did her too. It kinda reminds us of
what we were like when we were little."
"I think it looks nice," she
smiled. "Seems to me though that from here on out Sarah's taking over the
diaper changes for you kid." she gave him an extra little squeeze where a
mother isn't supposed to, and pulled the diapers up between his legs. It gave
Jonathan a start. "I'm going to miss my little boy, but he's kinda turning
into a big guy now."
Sarah and Jonathan got married after
college. Both went to Harvard, and afterwards into pediatric medicine at Tufts.
It was said that they seemed to always have a special feeling for kids. Tobin
and Tommy moved in together permanently when they both went off to U. Mass
together. Tobin finished a degree in library science while Tommy managed to
complete a law degree at B.U. They "officially" moved in together
during law school, while Tobin got a job working in B.U.'s library. The Curleys
threw them a housewarming and bought them a new couch and dining room table.
They'd done the same for Sarah and Jonathan the year before.
When Tobin and Tommy had headed off for U
Mass, the big house on Spring Street seemed very empty. Curley and Kate kind of
rattled around in it. They missed the constant commotion of boys running in and
out. It had been 9 years since little Jonathan had come into their lives.
Kate was sitting in the kitchen when
Curley answered the phone.
"Mark Struthers! Well how are you?
Haven't heard from you in ages. Jonathan? Yep he and Sarah just started their
second year at Harvard. Tobin's over at U. Mass now. Yes. Everythings great.
Yes. Proud as punch. Kinda rattles around here now. OK - take care - bye."
"What was all that about
Curley?"
"I'm not sure, just said he was
checking in."
Six weeks later Kate was standing by the
front porch as Curley escorted a little boy through the door in wet pants, a
defiant and confused look on his face.
THE
END
List of
Characters
Adults
Mrs. Coughlin - Tommy's mother,
single parent, formerly emotionally abusive mother.
Arthur Curley - his foster father
Kate Curley - Jonathan's foster
mother
Marylin Jackoby - Sarah's mother
- the school nurse
Joseph Miller - Vice principal of
Brookline elementary
Burt Phillips - Burger King
assistant coach
Mark Struthers - juvenile
probation officer
Lou Harrison - coach of Walters
& Scranton Little League Team
Children
Jonathan Allen - our hero, and a
thoroughly rotten kid at the start of this tale
Tommy Coughlin - young diaper
fetishist & former foster son of the Curley’s
Mikey, Timothy & Billy - 1st & Jason 2cnd graders in
the wet set
Sarah Jackoby- spunky girl and
whizz at baseball.
Joe Kelly - another rotten kid
Terry Smith 4th grader in wet
set. Wears leg braces
Tobin Wheeler, 4th grade
repressed diaper fetishist.