"New Kid on the Block"

Part 1 - "The Expected and the Unexpected"

	It was a late August afternoon that portended the end 
of summer and the start of Fall. For the last week Jeremy 
Rosen was busy helping his family move into their new home. 
The Rosens had just moved to the town of Stubenville upon 
his father's job transfer. Jeremy was so busy helping with 
boxes and putting things away that he had no time to become 
acquainted with his new friends and schoolmates.
	On this particular afternoon, seeing how hard Jeremy 
had worked, his mother Abby, suggested that he go outside 
and explore the neighborhood and perhaps visit the nearby 
playground and athletic field. Jeremy, who was ten years old 
and entering the fifth grade, was quite eager for this 
opportunity. After being ordered about by his mother, 
father, and 16-year old sister, Cindy, he needed the break.
	Upon leaving his new Bay Street home, Jeremy headed 
directly to the town's recreation fields where he hoped to 
meet some new kids. Arriving at the facility, he quickly 
viewed five boys who he was sure were about his age. Jeremy 
was a very personable and outgoing youngster who had no 
trouble making new friends. These five kids were on a grassy 
field tossing a football among themselves in anticipation of 
Fall. Without hesitation Jeremy approached the kids and 
quickly introduced himself.
	 As is always to case, these five fellows knew that 
Jeremy was the new kid on the block. At different times in 
the past week they saw the flurry of activity at the Rosen 
household and knew they would have a new friend in Jeremy. 
The boys quickly introduced themselves to Jeremy, and they 
all sat on the grassy field to talk. Jeremy spoke of his 
former town and school while the others told him about his 
new school, which would be opening in a few short weeks. As 
the lazy summer afternoon wore on, the talk turned to other 
subjects which included sports, television, video games, 
computers and Internet stuff.
	While they were seated and talking, Jeremy could see a 
boy in a wheelchair on the running track at the far end of 
the athletic/recreation area. From his vantage point Jeremy 
thought that this kid was about his age, and was surprised 
that he hadn't joined the group. Although Jeremy had no 
direct experiences with handicapped children, Jeremy was 
sure that this kid had to be just like everyone else.
	As time went by Jeremy's curiosity about this kid 
continued to mount, until finally Jeremy asked, "Who's the 
kid in the wheelchair over on the running track?" To his 
surprise his question was met with slightly muffled derisive 
laughter from among his new friends.
	"That's 'Stinker Man'", responded Dennis Hopkins.
	"Don't you mean 'Poopy Pants'?", snickered Frank 
Cardelli.
	"No," said Cal Smith. "You know who that is. That's 
'Diaper Butt'."
	At this point Jeremy couldn't understand why they had 
such mean names for someone in a wheelchair.
	Finally, Bill Freedland answered, "That Michael 
Stingling. He's our age and he's in our classroom at school. 
He's very smart, actually the class brain and teacher's pet, 
but he has to wear diapers all the time."
	"Diapers? How come?" asked Jeremy.
	The boys giggled again as Jeremy asked this question. 
The boys really didn't know the exact reason but they were 
of two opinions on this matter.
	"I think that he can't get out of his wheelchair to use 
the toilet," offered Cal Smith.
	"That's only part of it," said Dennis Hopkins. "I think 
he's too lazy to tell anyone when he needs to go to the 
bathroom. I overheard my mother talking to Michael's mother 
one day at a school function. I heard Mrs. Stingling say 
that she can't get Michael to take an interest in managing 
his own bathroom needs. In school, the teacher has to remind 
Michael to go see the school nurse during recess to have his 
diapers changed..."  "Anyhow," interrupted Frank Cardelli, 
"all I know is that he smells bad most of the time and we 
don't like being near him. All of us have stories about him, 
if you want to hear them."
	"Well...gee...I'm not sure...," said Jeremy. "This 
sounds awful personal...I don't know if we should be talking 
about this...I mean...you know, we wouldn't like it if it 
was one of us...you know?"
	 "Just one story. Pete Spangler has a good one. Go 
ahead, Pete, tell the museum story," said Bill Freeland.
	 Pete Spangler had been sitting there quietly since 
this topic came up, although he did partake of the laughter 
when Michael was first mentioned.
	"Oh...I don't know...I think Jeremy's right. We 
shouldn't be talking about this. Besides, the museum thing 
is a little unpleasant and a little embarrassing for 
Michael. We shouldn't be talking about his private 
business..."
	"I'll tell it, if you won't," volunteered Dennis 
Hopkins.
	"No, it's my story," said Pete, "and I'll tell it, but 
I think we should drop it after this." All of the boys who 
knew the story laughed knowingly as Pete got ready to tell 
it.
	"There isn't very much to the story," Pete began. "Last 
spring we went on a class trip to the science museum, 
Whenever we go on a trip, Mrs. Stingling has to come with 
Michael so she can take him to the bathroom, and take care 
of his diapers. Well, anyhow, it was early afternoon and I 
needed to use the bathroom. I went looking for a men's room 
and when I went in, I saw Michael being changed. That's 
all."
	"C'mon Pete," said Dennis, "tell the whole story."
	"Okay, but it's not very nice. When I went into the 
men's lavatory, there was a strong odor of doo-doo. Michael 
was out of his wheelchair, standing up in front of, and 
holding on to a sink. His trousers were lowered to the 
floor, and his rubber panties were pulled down over the 
metal things he wears on both of his legs, leg braces I 
think. There was a wet diaper on the floor, I caught a 
glimpse of it and it didn't appear to be dirty. I went to 
the urinal and did my business and I tried not to pay any 
attention to Michael and his mother. But the odor of poop 
seemed very strong, like someone went to the bathroom and 
didn't flush. When I finished I looked in one of the stalls 
and saw a wad of dirty toilet paper in the commode. So I 
figured I was right about someone not flushing..."
	"Yeah, but it was grosser than that," snickered Cal. 
"Tell Jeremy what really happened."
	"Okay, " said Pete. "I was going to finish the story. 
As I left the bathroom and walked past Michael and his 
mother, who by now was putting a new diaper on him, my 
attention was somehow directed to the bathroom floor. Again 
I saw his wet diaper on the floor, like next to him and off 
to the side. But on the floor, almost directly behind him, 
there were two large poops, like you would see in the toilet 
after you go. Then I quickly left the bathroom."
	Jeremy really didn't like this story and saw nothing 
funny about it. Hoping that this was the end of it, Dennis 
said, "Tell him the end of it, Pete."
	"That's it," said Pete, now a little annoyed with 
himself for having retold this for what seem the twentieth 
time.
	"No it isn't. I'll tell the rest," said Dennis. "Just 
before getting on the bus to return home, Pete overheard a 
conversation between Mrs. Stingling and our fourth grade 
teacher, Miss Skougar. Mrs. Stingling told her that after 
taking Michael to the bathroom she had to go looking for a 
janitor to mop up part of the bathroom floor because Michael 
had a bowel movement while his diaper was being changed. 
Isn't that disgusting...I mean he's right there in the 
bathroom and he couldn't tell his mother that he needed to 
use the toilet ?"
	By this time Jeremy knew that he had heard enough, but 
couldn't help asking, "What did the teacher say?"
	"Nothing. She had a frown on her face, almost a look of 
annoyance with Michael's mother for telling her what 
happened, but she didn't say anything," said Pete.
	"Well," said Dennis Hopkins, "don't be surprised if his 
mother calls your mother. She's always trying to get someone 
to be Michael's friend. I'll tell ya, you might visit with 
him once or twice, but you won't want to be around him after 
you get a good whiff of him. And wait til school starts and 
you see the way he stinks up the classroom and the school 
bus."
	By this time much of the afternoon had passed and the 
boys knew that the dinner hour was rapidly approaching. The 
boys disbursed to go home, and on his way home Jeremy 
thought about Michael and Michael's situation. Jeremy was 
easily toilet trained, and as the youngest of two children, 
had never been exposed to diapers or bathroom accidents in 
children. Although he had seen some of his younger cousins 
and neighborhood children in diapers, he had never given 
these matters much thought. While he could imagine the 
unpleasantness of being in a wet or dirty diaper, he wasn't 
sure that this was a reason to shun the fellow. So, while it 
seemed that learning of someone like Michael was unexpected, 
he also thought that maybe being friends with him wouldn't 
be so bad.
	Meanwhile, Michael had long since departed the running 
track and wheeled himself home. When he saw the boys 
laughing and occasionally looking his way, he instinctively 
knew that they were talking about him and his inability to 
control his bathroom functions. By now, Michael had come to 
expect this, thinking that another chance for a new 
friendship had just been ruined.

Part 2 - "Thoughts and Afterthoughts"

	When Jeremy arrived at home, his parents and sister 
were preparing to sit down for dinner. Quickly, he ran 
upstairs, got cleaned-up for dinner, and hastily returned to 
the dinner table. Dinner was always a family event in the 
Rosen household. Larry Rosen, Jeremy's father, was always 
eager to talk about everyone's day.
	For the Rosen women, wife Abby and daughter Cindy, it 
was just another day of trying to get settled into their new 
home. The moving-in job was nearly completed, but there were 
still additional odds and ends to be performed. After Abby 
and Cindy described their day, it was Jeremy's turn.
	Jeremy talked about meeting five new kids down at the 
athletic fields. Jeremy didn't have much to say about these 
fellows individually, as they were only engaged in small 
talk about the things of which pre-adolescent boys speak.
	"There was also a boy in a wheelchair," Jeremy offered. 
"I think they said his name is Michael Stingling, and he 
goes to my school. He's going into the fifth grade and they 
say he's very smart. One kid called him the teacher's pet."
	"That's interesting," said Jeremy's father. "Did he 
come over to join the rest of your group?"
	"No," said Jeremy. "He kept to himself on the running 
track, sort of racing in his wheelchair."
	 "Hmm, I wonder why he didn't join with the rest of his 
friends?" mused Abbey. "I mean if they all know each other, 
you'd think he'd come over to be introduced. Maybe you'll 
get to meet him once school begins,"
	"I don't know," muttered Jeremy. "They didn't say a 
whole lot about him and he wasn't there for very long."
	Jeremy was now anxious to drop this topic. He wasn't 
about ready to discuss the diaper-talk he had heard at the 
dinner table. However, Cindy could tell from Jeremy's tone 
of voice and facial expression that Jeremy was holding 
something back. Cindy made a mental note to pursue this with 
Jeremy later.
	Mr. Rosen was in a good mood and as dinner came to an 
end, he said, "Your mother and I'll give you a treat 
tonight. We'll do the dishes tonight. You can enjoy the rest 
of this beautiful summer evening. In another week or two 
you'll both be doing homework again."
	After putting their own dishes in the sink, Cindy and 
Jeremy headed out to the front porch. Jeremy wanted to look 
at the computer magazine his father brought home from work. 
Cindy was right behind him, anxious to hear the whole story 
about the kid in the wheelchair.
	After getting settled on the porch, Cindy said, "So 
little brother what's the rest of the scoop on this 
handicapped kid you saw?"
	Jeremy hated to be called "Little brother," as this had 
always been Cindy's way of asserting her self-assumed 
superiority over him. Nevertheless, he just drew a deep 
breath, and let it pass.
	"Nothing," mumbled Jeremy, as he began thumbing through 
his father's magazine.
	"I don't know," continued Cindy. "You sure seemed 
anxious to drop this after bringing it up. I agree with Mom. 
It's odd that he didn't join you and your new friends, 
especially since they go to school together, and he's 
supposed to be so smart."
	"I don't know...it just wasn't a big deal to me. Maybe 
he's just shy, or maybe he has a hard time meeting new 
kids...", Jeremy trailed off, again eager to drop this 
subject.
	"And they didn't say anything else about him?" 
persisted Cindy.
	"No!" Jeremy snapped. "Will you give it a rest, Cindy!"
	"Okay, okay, I'll drop it. But I know you, Little 
Brother, and there's more to this and it must be pretty 
unusual since you won't talk about it. This kid sounds like 
an outcast to me and there must be a reason for it."
	Jeremy just ignored her, and with that Cindy departed 
the porch to take a walk.
	Jeremy read on the porch until darkness fell and his 
eyes had gotten too tired to read. By this time everyone 
else was in the living room watching television and Jeremy 
decided that it was his bedtime. After getting washed and 
dressed for bed, Jeremy flopped on the bed and quickly 
turned-off his bedside lamp. It was a warm but pleasant 
night with a nice breeze blowing through his open window. As 
he drifted off to sleep, he began thinking about Michael.
	Jeremy was very bright and very logical, and as he 
mulled over what he had heard, it occurred to him that maybe 
none of this made any sense. After all, Jeremy thought, why 
would he need to wear diapers if he simply needed help 
getting out of his wheelchair to go to the bathroom.; if he 
could stand up to have his diaper changed, he could stand up 
to use the toilet. Being too lazy to tell anyone he needed 
to go made even less sense. No one would endure the 
embarrassment of wetting or messing their pants if they 
didn't have to. If we was smart enough to be the class 
brain, surely he was smart enough to get help to use the 
bathroom. No, Jeremy was sure they made up this "diaper 
thing" and that it probably wasn't true. But, why would Pete 
Spangler say he saw Michael being changed and pooping on the 
floor. Surely, it would take a vivid imagination to make 
that up. As all of these thoughts whirled in Jeremy's sleepy 
head, Jeremy realized that he was quite fascinated by all of 
this, and that he wanted to get to the bottom of it. Maybe 
Michael's mother will call my mother, maybe I could be his 
friend, at least for a little while...
	Michael's bedtime had also arrived, too. As Mrs 
Stingling got Michael ready for bed, Michael told her about 
seeing Jeremy.
	"I think there's a new kid in the neighborhood and I 
think he's my age," said Michael.
	"Oh?" said Mrs. Stingling as she got Michael out of his 
wheelchair and onto the his bed. "What makes you think he's 
about your age?"
	"I saw him at the play field and he was talking to 
Dennis, Frank, Cal and those guys."
	By this time Mrs. Stingling had removed the jogging 
pants Michael had been wearing and she began undoing the 
velcro straps which fastened his leg braces around his legs. 
As she untied his shoes and prepared to remove his 
orthopedic hardware, she couldn't help but imagine what 
transpired between this new boy and this group."
	"Did you go over and join them?" she asked.
	"No. I think they saw me wheeling about, and they were 
talking about me...so I didn't go over to where they were," 
he said.
	Her worst suspicions about these kids were being 
realized. "You can tell me more in a minute, let me get some 
things from the bathroom." With that, she went into the 
bathroom to get some wipes, a pair of diapers, and a change 
of plastic pants. At this point she was sure she could 
imagine all of the terrible things they said about her son, 
including the nicknames that had gotten back to both of 
them.
	As she entered the bedroom, she asked, "So why do you 
think you were being talked about?"  "They were laughing 
among themselves, and they kept looking over towards me...it 
was like they were making fun of me...I could tell by the 
way they were laughing..."
	Mrs. Stingling had removed Michael's rubber pants and 
had begun to unpin his diapers, which contained a small 
bowel movement. She felt very sorry hearing this from her 
son. She didn't think she would ever adjust to the shunning 
and teasing he had to endure, nevertheless, she thought that 
this might be another good time to talk about these matters 
with him.
	"Did you know you had a BM?" she asked.
	"I know it now," he said as the odor had wafted about 
his room.
	"No, I mean did you know it when I began changing 
you?," she said a little sternly.
	"I'm not sure," he said. "Maybe I did smell something," 
he said a little disingenuously, hoping that she'd drop this 
subject, but knowing that she wouldn't.
	 "Hmm...well I knew it the minute I pulled your pants 
down...that's why I brought these wipes back with me." As 
she began cleaning him up, she continued, "You know, 
Michael, it breaks my heart that you have to cope with this 
problem, and that you're teased and shunned by other kids. 
But, as I've said before, you have to learn to help 
yourself..."
	Michael knew what was coming, as he had heard it all 
before from his mother and grandmother, especially since 
starting school...
	"First and foremost, you have to tell me, or grandma, 
or your teacher, or Miss Rodgers when you've had a bowel 
movement. I know that you can't feel it or control it, but 
there's nothing wrong with your nose. The minute you smell 
it, tell one of us that you need to be changed..."
	"But I was in a chat room on the Internet talking to 
another kid, and..."
	"...I don't care. You need to get into the habit of 
telling someone when you need to go to the bathroom.
	 Likewise when you're wet and you can smell it, tell 
us. Don't wait till everyone within 30 feet knows you've 
gone to the bathroom in your pants. When all of us know we 
need to use the bathroom, we go; nobody has the luxury of 
putting it off indefinitely, and you're no exception. You're 
not going to have any friends until you do a better job 
keeping your private business a secret..."
	By this time Mrs. Stingling had finished changing 
Michael and getting him into his pj's. Gathering up the used 
wipes, his rubber pants, and soiled diapers, she wished him 
a good night. "Michael, I love you very much, you're all I 
have, and I only want what's best for you."
	Michael now lay in his darkened room, drifting off to 
sleep. He was very content to have others look after his 
bathroom needs, and so what if others didn't like the way he 
smelled, it wasn't his fault that he was completely 
incontinent, people would just have to accept him the way he 
was.
	As Mrs. Stingling rinsed out Michael's dirty diaper in 
the commode, and got ready to wash out his rubber pants, she 
thought about the new boy in the neighborhood. She thought, 
"Maybe I'll try again to get a new friend for Michael. 
Perhaps this boy will be different, a little more 
understanding, a little more tolerant...tomorrow I'll go 
looking for him."

Part 3 - "The Visit"

	The next morning dawned as the beginning of yet another 
beautiful late summer day. Michael had been awake 
daydreaming about the end of summer and the start of the new 
school term. Although he enjoyed his summer and the many 
outings he had with his grandparents, he was looking forward 
to the start of school. Michael was an excellent student who 
loved school right from the start. In spite of his social 
problems he managed well in school. Actually, although the 
boys were tough on him, the girls at school were much nicer 
to him, although they could keep their distance too at those 
times when Michael was noticeably wet or soiled.
	Michael's mother came into the bedroom to get their day 
started. Mrs. Stingling was employed as a paralegal, but had 
taken this week off from work to do those back to school 
things with Michael.
	"Are you awake?" she asked as she entered his bedroom 
with a change of diapers from the bathroom.
	"Yeah, I've been awake for awhile. I was going to get 
in my wheelchair and get on the computer for a while, but 
then I decided to stay put till you came to change me," he 
said.
	"Okay. Well you can play on the computer while I make 
breakfast. When you're done with breakfast I'll get you in 
the tub so you can take a bath. Afterwards, you're on your 
own for a while, I have some errands I want to run. In fact, 
when I'm running the water you can sit on the toilet for a 
few minutes and we'll see if you can have a bowel movement. 
You've been going at midmorning the last few days, except 
for that mess you had last night."
	"Do I have to?" he asked, clearly annoyed.
	"Yes. I'm going to be gone for several hours and I 
don't want you sitting here in dirty diapers, if you don't 
have to."
	By this time she had changed his diapers. As usual he 
was soaking wet first thing in the morning, and the smell of 
his urine began to permeate the bedroom. After checking his 
bed clothes to make sure they had stayed dry, she sprayed 
his room with a little air freshener and disposed of his wet 
diapers in the diaper pail in their bathroom. Michael had 
pulled his pj bottoms back up over his rubber pants and had 
transferred himself into his wheelchair and was now at the 
pc. 
	As Mrs. Stingling fixed breakfast, she thought of her 
hoped-for encounter with Jeremy's mother. As she did on 
several other occasions, she planned to fully explain 
Michael's disability and suggest that the boys might get 
together for lunch. She did this in the past and always with 
what was becoming a predictable outcome. Parents were always 
eager for their kids to meet Michael, and they always got 
along fine until Michael had an unpleasant accident...and 
then no one wanted anything more to do with him. If only he 
would tell me when he knows he needs to be changed...she 
thought.
	After breakfast Michael headed into the bathroom to get 
washed. Mrs. Stingling got Michael ready for his bath, and, 
as threatened, sat him on the toilet as the tub filled. 
Although his bladder voided uncontrollably as he sat there, 
he hadn't pooped by time his mother lifted him from the 
toilet and placed him in the tub. "Oh well," Mrs. Stingling 
thought, "yet another messy diaper to look forward to later 
on."
	When Michael was done bathing and dried off, his mother 
got him back in his wheelchair and tossed a towel over his 
lap. Michael wheeled into his bedroom and slid back into bed 
and waited for his mother to come in and diaper him. Mrs. 
Stingling was right there and after taking care of him, he 
finished dressing himself.
	"Mom?" he asked, after his mother took care of his 
personal need.
	"What, honey?" she replied.
	 "Can I go without my leg braces today. I think I'll be 
more comfortable...," he said.
	 "Well you shouldn't, in fact you need to start 
practicing your walking with your crutches, you know what 
Dr. Moore said..."
	 "I know..but I just want to..."
	 "Okay, just today...but we need to get down to work. 
I'd like to get you out of that wheelchair by the time you 
become 11 (I'd also like to get you out of diapers by 
yesterday she thought). Listen, I'm going out for a while. 
If you need anything call grandma or grandpa, they're both 
home today. Also, if you need to be changed , one of them 
will come to take care of that too."
	"Right," said Michael, somewhat unenthusiastically.
	With that Mrs. Stingling left the house hoping to find 
the Rosen's new home. It dawned on her that the Hassinger 
home in the next block of Bay Street had been up for sale, 
and perhaps that's where the new kid lived. As she walked 
down the street she was pleased to see Larry and Abby Rosen 
working on the shrubbery in front of their new home.
	 Mrs. Stingling approached them, holding out her hand. 
"Hi, I'm Linda Stingling, welcome to the neighborhood..."
	 "Thank you, I'm Abby Rosen, and this is my husband 
Larry," Abby said.
	 "Howdy, Linda," said Larry, as he put down his spade 
and extended his hand to her. "We've been here for about 10 
days and there's still plenty of work to do..."
	"I can imagine," said Linda Stingling. "Tell me, do you 
have any children?"
	"Yes, we have a son and a daughter. Cindy's the oldest, 
sixteen, and Jeremy just turned ten and he's starting the 
fifth grade. Cindy's going to be a senior, she's an 
"advanced placement" kid, and she'll be graduating a year 
early," Larry said proudly.
	"That's very good. I guess we have something in common. 
I have a son who's almost 11 and he's also starting the 
fifth grade.  Actually he's very bright, but he's a little 
behind for his age. You see, he's disabled and he missed a 
year of school because of hospitalizations. But he does very 
well," offered Linda. "His name is Michael."
	"Oh, I think Jeremy saw him the other day at the 
playground. Does your son use a wheelchair?" asked Abby.
	"Yes, and he frequents the playground often. He likes 
to race in his wheelchair on the track there," said Linda.
	"Why don't the two of you go inside and have coffee and 
Danish and get better acquainted," suggested Larry. "It 
seems like the two of you will have much in common."
	 The two women liked that idea, especially since the 
sun had gotten quite warm, but not unpleasant. The two 
ladies retreated to Abby's still not quite settled kitchen.
	"Don't mind the way the kitchen appears, I'm still 
moving things around," apologized Abby.
	"Think nothing of it, it all takes time I know,' 
replied Linda.
	"I hope you don't mind," started Abby, "but Jeremy 
mentioned your son at dinner last night and Larry and I were 
a little surprised the lad didn't interact with Jeremy and 
the other boys at the playground the other day and..." Abby 
trailed off.
	"Well, I'm not surprised, and in fact I was hoping we 
could talk about that, if you don't mind," said Linda 
Stingling, a little timidly.
	"Sure," said Abby.
	"Well Michael was born with a birth defect known as 
spina bifida, sometimes called "open spine." When he was 
developing, prior to birth, his spinal cord didn't close at 
a certain point, and so he's paralyzed from his waist, 
down..."
	"I see," interjected Abby.
	"So, he wears leg braces and uses a wheelchair, 
although we really think he can learn to walk with crutches. 
And he's....ah...well...he's completely incontinent....he 
has no sensory awareness of, or control over, his bowel and 
bladder functions.  And so, ah....well...he needs to wear 
diapers, and so, this has created some social acceptance 
problems for him.."
	"Oh,' said Abby a little uncomfortably.
	"Most of the time the others don't like to socialize 
with him because of his odors, even though we try to get him 
changed frequently. And, of course, when he's had a 
noticeable accident, he gets teased and shunned. I must say 
he can be his own worst enemy at times because he often 
knows after the fact that he needs to be changed, but he 
doesn't tell me, or his teacher in school. The school nurse, 
Miss Rodgers, attends to his diaper changes in school. 
Actually, he's at an age where he should be attending to his 
own diapering, but he won't even tell us that he needs to be 
changed, so there's no way he's going to change himself...." 
said Linda.
	"Yes, I see," said Abby, now hoping to get off this 
subject.
	"He's really a good kid," continued Linda, "And this 
isn't his fault. I sometimes think that he's being punished 
for my sin. I was single when I got pregnant with Michael. 
Michael's father was going to marry me, but we had pre-natal 
testing done, and the test showed the Michael was going to 
have this birth defect, and his father wanted no part of a 
defective baby, so he got a job elsewhere and moved on. I 
never knew there were such kids with these kinds of 
problems, so this has been an amazing experience for me. I 
mean everybody's kid can walk, except for those kids you see 
on posters or telethons. And every kid gets toilet trained 
by the time they're three or four; I mean, I never thought 
I'd be changing diapers on an almost eleven year old 
kid...you know, he's already showing signs of the onset of 
puberty...he's getting pubic hair...and..you know...."
	By this time Abby Rosen was beginning to feel some 
sympathy towards Linda Stingling's plight.
	"Well, if I can ever help you..." Abby began.
	 "I got a lot of help from my parents. They live 
nearby. In fact, I'd be in utter poverty without them. They 
paid my tuition for paralegal training and I got a good job 
with the biggest law firm in town, and my boss is wonderful 
too. But as far as Michael is concerned, I very thankful for 
my father. He does everything for him. He's a retired 
engineer and he built Michael's p.c., which he just loves. 
Also, he takes Michael to museums and Cubs games and he just 
great about attending to Michael, even in public restrooms 
where there's almost no privacy. I'm sorry, I know I'm 
rambling, on and on.... Anyhow, I was wondering if maybe 
Jeremy could come by for lunch and meet Michael and..."
	"Well...yes...sure...why not. They'd probably have much 
in common and they're going to be classmates. Actually, 
Jeremy's a very good student too, and loves computers and 
the Internet, and all that stuff that I don't understand; 
he's also a Cubs fan too. Should I explain Michael's 
condition to Jeremy, first," Abby asked.
	"No.  I want to see if I can get Michael to pay more 
attention to his bathroom needs. Maybe, Jeremy will be the 
catalyst for this. Let's not inform him, and let's see how 
this works out," said Linda.
	"Okay. That's your decision. How about the beginning of 
next week, say the Tuesday after Labor Day, perhaps noonish 
or one o'clock?" suggested Abby.
	 "Great!" said Linda. "This will be good."
	Cindy Rosen had been standing in the dining room, 
behind the kitchen doorway and had overheard almost all of 
the conversation. "So, no wonder this kid in the wheelchair 
is an outcast. I wouldn't want to be around anyone in smelly 
diapers, especially a big kid; it's bad enough when I baby 
sit I have to change a baby. I can imagine what it's like 
for a big kid. Gee, what if Jeremy wore diapers; yuck, it's 
bad enough when he finishes sitting on the pot. Hmm, I 
wonder if Jeremy knows what's going on with this kid...maybe 
that's why he didn't say much at dinner last night...I'm 
going to find out," she thought. 

Part 4

	Soon after Linda Stingling left the Rosen household, 
Larry came into the kitchen where Abby was cleaning-up after 
their lunch and conversation.
	"So how did you and our new neighbor hit it off?" asked 
Larry, in his typically affable way.
	"I don't know," said Abby, "I may have agreed to 
something that I shouldn't have, or at least not without 
talking to Jeremy first."
	"Why do you say that? What could you have done that's 
now so regrettable?" wondered Larry.
	"Well, it's kind of hard for me to talk about this. 
Remember at dinner last night when Jeremy was talking about 
Linda's son, and it seemed to us that it was strange that he 
didn't interact with Jeremy and those other boys?" reminded 
Abby.
	"Sure, I also call that we commented further on it to 
each other while we were doing the dishes," said Larry.
	"Well, there is a reason for this. I'm a little 
uncomfortable talking about this, so try to bear with me, 
"started Abby.
	"Sure, go on, you know we can discuss anything between 
us," Larry said, reassuringly.
	"I'm not sure I completely understand all of this. 
Linda Stingling talked quickly, and in sort of a jumbled 
way, like she was embarrassed. Anyway, Michael has a birth 
defect, I think she said spinal bifida, or maybe it was 
spina bifida, and he's paralyzed from the waist down," Abby 
continued.
	"I see," Larry interjected.
	"And he has another difficulty which is possibly more 
problematic for him. Apparently, he cannot be toilet trained 
because he has no bowel or bladder control, and so, he wears 
diapers, and ..." Abby trailed off.
	"Yes, I can see where this could be a big problem," 
interjected Larry again.
	"...and I guess for the obvious reasons, he's shunned 
and humiliated by the other kids, and I guess he's very 
isolated socially. He's a very good student in school and is 
really into personal computers, and...," said Abby.
	"But what does this have to do with Jeremy?" 
interrupted Larry.
	"....Well, Linda essentially wants a friend for 
Michael, and she wanted to know if Jeremy could stop by 
before school begins to meet Michael. It sounds like they'll 
both be in the same classroom in school," said Abby.
	"And what did you say about Jeremy visiting with her 
son?" Larry asked.
	"I said yes, and they're supposed to get together next 
Tuesday, after Labor Day, just before the start of school. 
But now I'm starting to have second thoughts..." said Abby.
	"Because...?" said Larry.
	"Because Jeremy's only human too, and I don't know if 
we can expect him to be friends to someone he might not be 
comfortable being around. I mean, you know, what if Michael 
has an accident and messes himself while they're together, 
and suppose there's an unpleasant odor. Can we expect Jeremy 
to just sit there, and do the super human, by just ignoring 
it. You know what goes on now between Cindy and Jeremy when 
one of them leaves their "signature" in the bathroom... I 
don't know. I don't want Jeremy to tease or humiliate this 
boy, I do want him to be compassionate, but, I don't expect 
him to endure something that could be quite unpleasant..." 
Abby explained.
	"Well, I'm sure by this time, Michael asks to be 
changed the minute he realizes he's had an accident, or 
maybe he takes care of it on his own, after all, he's what, 
ten or eleven, and he probably wants to take care of his 
private business, you know? So maybe it's not as bad as 
you're imagining it to be," offered Larry.
	"That's not the impression I got from Linda. For 
starters he apparently doesn't change his own diapers; she 
and her parents do it when they're with him and the school 
nurse takes care of him in school. What's worse, if I 
understood her correctly, he's very unconcerned about his 
bathroom needs and apparently doesn't communicate the need 
to be changed. It seems like everybody has to be responsible 
but him. Linda works full-time as a paralegal. So if Jeremy 
and Michael are alone and he has an accident, well you see 
my point..." Abby said.
	"I do, so what are you going to do?"
	"Well, I don't want to renege on my promise. So, I'll 
just ask Jeremy to go visit Michael. But, if there's a 
problem and Jeremy doesn't want to socialize with him, I 
don't think I can force the issue," Abby said. "I plan to 
ask him during dinner tonight."
	"And are you going to explain this aspect of his 
handicap, to him?" inquired Larry.
	"No. Linda wants to use the start of this friendship as 
a vehicle for getting Michael to better deal with these 
issues and I agreed to go along. However, I wouldn't be 
surprised if Jeremy's already aware of this since he talked 
with those other kids at the playground the other day."
	"Well, you may be right about that. We'll just have to 
see how this works out." concluded Larry.
	Larry and Abby both thought that this topic had been 
exhausted. Larry wanted to return to his yard work and Abby 
had errands to run before starting dinner later that 
afternoon. The Rosens became quickly preoccupied with their 
afternoon tasks and didn't give any more thought to Linda 
Stingling's visit. However, Abby's thoughts returned to it 
as she began to prepare dinner.
	As the dinner meal began Cindy Rosen and her father 
were both apprehensive to see how this topic would be 
handled by Mrs. Rosen. Of course, neither Mr. nor Mrs. Rosen 
had any awareness of Cindy's knowledge of Linda Stingling's 
visit. After much small talk around the dinner table, Abby 
Rosen, a little apprehensively said, "Oh Jeremy, we had a 
visit today by Mrs. Stingling, she's the mother of the boy 
in the wheelchair you saw yesterday..."
	"Oh," said Jeremy, not expressing much interest.
	"Apparently," Mrs. Rosen continued, "he's about your 
age, maybe a little older, and he's going to be a classmate 
of yours when school starts."
	"Yeah," said Jeremy, "the other boys told me that 
yesterday..." Jeremy hadn't given his playground encounter 
much thought, although it seemed that his memories of his 
conversation were quickly returning.
	"You and Michael have much in common," interjected Mr. 
Rosen. "Michael's a big Chubbies fan like you and he's into 
computers, and he's a very good student."
	"Hmm," said Jeremy, trying not to express much 
interest.
	"Jeremy, Michael's in a wheelchair because he has a 
birth defect and he's paralyzed below his waist. But other 
than that he's very normal and...well.. his mother would 
like the two of you to become friends and she thought maybe 
you could have lunch with him next Tuesday...", Abby's voice 
trailed off.
	"That's a great idea," said Larry. "I'm sure they'll 
hit it off just great."
	It occurred to Jeremy that this is exactly what the 
boys said would happen. Jeremy was a little surprised that 
everything was happen so fast, too.
	"Gee, I don't know," said Jeremy, "Well...I mean...I 
suppose....I guess it couldn't hurt to visit him 
once...I..."
	Cindy sat there quietly observing the conversation. 
Jeremy was usually very outgoing and not shy about meeting 
new people, adults and kids alike. It immediately occurred 
to her that Jeremy probably knew what she knew, and she was 
going to find out.
	"Good!," exclaimed Abby. "I'll call Linda back tomorrow 
and let her know you'll join Michael for lunch."
	"Mom, Dad, " interrupted Cindy. "I was wondering if we 
could get another break from the dishes tonight. I heard 
there's a nifty ice cream parlor near the mall. I wanted to 
take Jeremy for some ice cream."
	"What's this?" chuckled Larry. "A new found love 
between brother and sister? Are you treating Jeremy, or am I 
going to pay for this outing?"
	"No, " said Cindy. "I'll pay. It's another nice night 
and I wanted to check this place out."
	"Well," said Abby, "I guess it's OK, but I don't want 
you guys to forget how to do the dishes, it took me too long 
to get you two trained."
	Jeremy was completely confused. Since when did Cindy 
ever want to take him anywhere. But for ice cream, Jeremy 
wasn't going to look a gift horse in the mouth. Cindy and 
Jeremy had pretty much finished eating and dutifully took 
their plates and utensils to the kitchen sink.
	"What gives Cindy," asked Jeremy as he put his 
dinnerware in the sink and ran some water. "Nothing, can't I 
treat my brother to some ice cream. Look, I need to hit the 
bathroom, I'll meet you on the porch in a few, OK?" said 
Cindy.
	"Fine," said Jeremy as he headed towards the front 
porch. At this moment Jeremy had a vague feeling of 
uneasiness. In the back of his mind he wasn't sure if he 
really wanted to visit this kid in the wheelchair who was 
supposed to wear diapers. And why did Cindy want to take him 
for ice cream. What gives, he thought.
	As he pondered these thoughts Cindy returned carrying 
her sweater. "Ready to go, little brother," she asked with a 
bit of teasing in her voice.
	"Not if this is about picking on me," Jeremy said with 
some annoyance.
	"This isn't about anything," said Cindy. "I thought we 
could visit this ice cream place. I promise not to talk the 
whole time."
	With that they venture off and want turned out to be a 
circuitous walk of over a mile in the approaching darkness. 
After a time Cindy asked, "So what do you know about this 
crippled kid?"
	"Not much, only what Mom and Dad said tonight..." 
Jeremy ventured.
	"I thought those other kids talked about him the other 
day at the playground...." she wondered.
	"No...not really..." Jeremy said a little reluctantly, 
recalling the diaper talk that he was not going to share 
with his sister.
	"Oh," said Cindy. With that they walked another block 
in silence.
	"You know," Cindy said finally, "it's a shame he can't 
walk and needs to stay in that wheelchair. It must be pretty 
tough..."
	"I suppose...," responded Jeremy
	"I wonder how he goes to the bathroom," she inquired, 
almost as though she was thinking aloud.
	"What?" asked Jeremy, incredulously. "Why would you 
think of that?"
	"Well, if he can't walk and if he can't get out of his 
wheelchair, I wonder how he handles it. Maybe somebody has 
to help him or maybe he wears diapers ?" she suggested 
quizzically.
	"Diapers ! Why would you say that? Big kids don't wear 
diapers unless they're retarded or something. Why did you 
even bring this up?" he asked with a combination of surprise 
and curiosity.
	"I don't know. I think I saw a disabled girl on TV on a 
telethon once and she was on crutches and they had her walk 
across the stage and it looked there might have been diapers 
under her dress...her dress stuck out over her back side and 
I think her father told the host she was incontinent, and 
... "
	"Incontinent? What's that? " asked Jeremy.
	"It means you can't control when you have to go to the 
bathroom...like older people get that way. My friend Suszy's 
grandmother was like that and she wore those diapers that 
you see on TV...Suszy's mother had to take care of her and 
everything..."
	"Oh," said Jeremy in a voice that clearly indicated his 
desire to drop this subject
	"Well, I was just wondering about this new kid, and 
..." said Cindy.
	"I'm sure he goes to the bathroom just like everybody 
else, and I'm sure he doesn't wear diapers, so let's drop 
this, OK" said Jeremy somewhat scoldingly.
	"That's what you think. Boy are you in for a surprise 
the first time you smell his wet and messy diapers." Cindy 
thought to herself.
	By this time they had made their way back home, ice 
cream eaten, both ready to hit the hay. After exchanging 
good nights with everyone Jeremy quickly went to his 
bedroom. He wasted no time in getting himself ready for bed 
and even he was surprised by how quickly he had completed 
his bedtime preparations and found himself in bed.
	As he lay there he found himself again thinking about 
Michael, his impending visit, and Cindy's expressed 
curiosity. How did Cindy know about his diapers? Did one of 
her new girlfriends tell her? And why didn't Mom mention it 
at dinner? Maybe this boy's mother never mentioned it. At 
this point he found himself getting drowsier and he began 
think about being in diapers. I wonder what it's like to wet 
or mess yourself. I wonder what his mother says to him while 
she's changing him, and what it looks and smells like. As he 
drifted off to sleep he realized that he was more curious 
about this than he realized, and that his private body part 
was getting large and firm while he pondered these things.