BRUCE

My mom went to bed early tonight and I stayed up to watch a late night movie. The house was quiet when I went I got ready for bed. I had pushed closed my bedroom door but did not shut it, it stood open only a few inches. I worked as quietly as I could but the plastic backing of the disposable diaper made some noise as I unfolded it and when I put it on. I stood up and turned to find my mom standing in the doorway staring at me. The only thing I had on was the diaper. I froze and time seem to freeze, My mom looking at me and me looking it her. I am not a bed wetter, and have no medical need to wear diapers, and as far I know she had no idea that I even had diapers in the house. I thought, say something but what do I say.

“I think we need to have a talk in the morning.” My mom finally said.

“Yea.” Was all I could say as I started for one of the tapes to undo it.

“You put that diaper on for a reason, no sense in taking it off, we will talk about it in the morning. Goodnight.” My mom said.

“Goodnight” I said softly.

I did not sleep much tonight, I laid wake thinking of what questions my mom would ask and the answers I would give to her. I also was thinking how stupid I must have looked just standing there in my diaper and how long had she been standing at the door.

The smell of breakfast cooking is what I awoke to. I had not used the diaper so I took it off and hid it under my bed. I then went to the bathroom and did my morning thing. After that I went to breakfast in my PJs.

“I see my sleepyhead is a wake.” My mom said.

“Yea, I’m awake.”

“Did you sleep well?”

“Not really.”

“Sorry to hear that. Did you wet your diaper?”

“No.”

“Bruce, why were you wearing a diaper to bed?” My mom asked in a calm voice like all fourteen year old boys wear diapers and its no big deal.

“Because.”

“Because, does not cut it. I want an honest answer from you, Bruce.”

I had read on different web sites ways of telling your parents about your wish to wear diapers and some of the questions that might be asked. The one thing that the different web sites stated was to tell the truth and be honest with what you would like from your parents, be it understand or all the way to caring for you like a baby. Ok, she asked for an honest answer and I gave her one I thought.

“I like to wear diapers, mom. I have been wearing them to bed over the last two months and that is the only time I wear them. I am not a bed wetter. I know that I can not go back and relive my early childhood, but I can try to hold on to it by wearing diapers. I am sorry, if you are disappointed with me. I ask for your understanding, and I know this is a shock to you.”

“You are correct, that this is a shock to me. I was not expecting the answer you gave me, I expected something very different.”

“You thought I was bed wetter, right?”

“Yes, and that is way I was not upset last night, disappointed that you did not tell me tho.”

“So by telling the truth I am in trouble, and if I lied I would not be in trouble.” I barked. I could see that my mom was getting mad and upset with me.

“Drop the attitude, Bruce. You are in enough trouble now as it is, don’t add to it. Do you understand me!” My mom stated in a very stern voice.

“Yes.”

“Why in the world would you want to wear a diaper any ways? There must be something wrong with you!”

I waited a few moments before speaking. I could see that this was not going to go well so I took a deep breath and tried to calm myself, I have to keep my cool. None of the web sites said that it easy telling your parents, but they did say that you have to control your feelings and do it by your rules. Well, so much for my rules, now if I just keep my feeling in check. I could tell my mom was waiting and I could see her understanding level was dropping fast.

“First off, nothing is wrong with me. If I did wet my bed would wearing a diaper be wrong? No, why because as the ads in your magazines and the ads on TV promote it. OK so I don’t wet my bed, and maybe it is odd to want to wear a diaper, but I like wearing them. It offers a level of freedom, and at the same time gives me a secure feeling. Like I said, I know I can not go back to my early childhood, when you loved me. Maybe …” I was cut off by my mom.

“Honey, I love you, I always have and I always will love you. You are my son. Maybe I don’t show it because I embarrassed you when I do, but I still love you. You don’t need a diaper as a substitute for my love.” My mom said as she took me into her arm and hugged me.

“Let’s have breakfast first, then we will talk again about your diapers. OK sweetie?”

“OK.”

We ate breakfast and my mom talked about the plans she had for the day, it was pretty much the same plan as last Saturday and the Saturday before that. We finished breakfast and my mom cleared the breakfast dishes from the table and poured her self a second cup of coffee. She asked if I wanted any more juice, I did not. She sat back down and it was time to talk.

She asked questions, pointed questions and I answered them. She also asked some leading questions and I answered them too. She also asked questions a lot of different subjects. Which I answered. Some were embarrassing to answer. I tried to be open and honest with each answer, hoping that she would understand. She kept asking if I had wet my bed, and each time the answer was the same, no. Mom did ask where I had hidden my diapers and what I had done with the diapers when I did use them. I told her under my bed was where the diapers were hidden as for the used one well they too went under my bed until after school when I could throw them in the trash can. She also asked me what I wanted from her. I told her what ever she was comfortable with would be fine by me. We sat that the kitchen table talking for over two hours before I was dismissed to take my shower and get dressed. I guess it went OK, mom had not asked or ordered me to throw out my diapers out.

Mom added an extra stop this Saturday, Wally World, I asked why and she said that she was looking for a mattress cover. That was fine by me, I wanted to check out a new CD. Mom stated that I had to come with her because she was not going to spent time looking for me, what a bummer. We walked into to Wally World and head straight for the bedding section.

“Bruce, help me look for mattress covers.”

“They’re right there.” I pointed to the end of the row.

“OK, we need one for a twin bed that is waterproof.”

“Waterproof?”

“Yes, waterproof. You are not going to urine soak your mattress and have your room smell of stale urine.”

“But I don’t wet my bed, I told you that.” I said in a whisper.

“You asked me to understand what you want to do and for me to do what I felt comfortable with, correct?”

“Yes.”

“I want to protect the bed you are sleeping in, do you understand my want.”

“Yes.”

My mom picked up a waterproof mattress cover and we headed to the check out line.

When we got home from shopping mom had me strip my bed down to the mattress. She came in to my room and checked the mattress for any signs that I had wet my bed. Finding none, the new waterproof mattress cover was put on and my bed remade. I thought that was the end of it as the rest of the day and evening went as normal. Expect that mom did spend over an hour on the computer, she said it was for work. We had dinner and watched TV.

At eleven o’clock P.M. I switched to channel eight to watch Mad TV as I have done for the last six months.

“Bruce, its time you got ready for bed.”

“Oh, mom. I want to watch this.”

“Bruce, I said its time. Now move it. You can watch you show after you are in your PJs.”

My mom had that look that said do it or you will be very sorry you didn’t. So I got up and headed for my bed room.

“Bruce, stop by the bathroom first.”

That was an odd request coming from my mom but I did it any ways. After the bathroom I walked into my bed room to find my diaper from last night on my bed and my mom waiting for me.

“Get undressed, or do you want me to it?”

I froze not sure what to do for a moment.

“Ah, I can do it, you don’t need to stay.”

“I am sure you can, as I know from last night, but thing are different now. You want to be a little boy and wear diapers, then mommy has to put them on for you. That is what you told me, right.”

“Yea, but you know, its embarrassing.”

“So you don’t want to wear diapers then.”

“No, it’s ...”

“Bruce, I diapered you for the first four and a half years of your life. I know what you look like down their now get undressed, or come over here and I will do it.”

“I know what I said, about doing things to your comfort level, I just did not expect this so soon that all.”

“Well you were open and honest with me with what you wanted, and you felt that I don’t love and care for you enough and that you want to go back in time to when I did. Well the clock has moved back in time for you, you are now my little boy.” She said as she came to me and started to undo the buttons on my shirt.

“I know you love me you made that point clear this morning. I just don’t expect you to be so willing this early on that’s all.”

By now my shirt was unbuttoned and by belt was undone.

“Its too late now to have second thoughts.”

“Do you think …” My pants and underwear were pulled down.

“Lift your foot, sweetie.” I did as was asked.

“Now the other foot, please.”

I was now standing in front of my mother in my birth suit, embarrassed and yet excited. She turned me around and had me flat on back on the bed. It took her two tries to get the diaper at the right spot on my body and to tape the sides shut.

“And, yes I still know how to put a diaper on you.” My mom said with some pride. “Now sit up so I can put your PJ top on.” I did as asked.

When my mom was done we went back out to the family room and mom sat down on the couch and had me lay down on the couch with my head on her lap to watch the TV. With one hand she patted my diapered bottom and with her other resting on my head. It felt so good, so safe, so right, a little embarrassing, and I was so tired that I went to sleep right there.

I woke to my mom shaking my shoulder. It took me a minute to figure out that I was in my room and in my bed and that it was light outside.

“What time is it?” I asked, think it had to be early.

“It’s ten o’clock in the morning.”

I looked at my alarm clock its red face was shining 10:00. I rolled over and heard the rustling sound of my disposable diaper as I moved. I stopped.

“Do you need your diaper changed Bruce?

“No. What?.” I asked as if yesterday had not happened.

With that the top bed sheets were pulled back, and mom then helped me out of bed. I did not want to move but I had too. I started for the bathroom when mom asked me where I going.

“The bathroom, OK?” I asked, trying to use my hands to cover my diaper.

“Little boys with diapers on go potty in their diapers and then mommies change their diapers.”

The fog my mind was in was lifting very fast now and I could feel the warmth of my face as my blood raced to my face for that glowing red blush of embarrassment.

“Bruce, you have no need to be embarrassed. You said that you wanted to wear diapers and that you had and were going to continue to wear diapers. That is fine by me that you want to wear diapers, you also stated that I was to do for you what I felt comfortable with. You now you can wear and use your diapers full time, and I will be changing your diapers.”

“Full time! But I don’t want to wear diapers to school. Please don’t make wear them to school, please.” I begged her.

My mom said in a tone that suggested it might be too late. “If you are a very good boy today and don’t put up a fuss, I will let you go to school tomorrow in big boy underwear.” With that she took my hand and headed for the kitchen.

During breakfast I relaxed and let my bladder empty into my diaper. I could feel the warmth of my pee around my balls and my bottom and even on my legs. ‘Oh shit, my diaper is leaking and I just wet my chair mom is going to kill me.’ I thought.

“Ah mom, I think I have a problem!” I said as I stood up to look at my chair for the damage done.

“What’s wrong?”

“I think my diaper is starting to leak.” I could feel a few drops of my warm pee working its way down on the inside of my right leg.

Mom got up from the table a took my hand and took me to the bathroom and she then had me stand in the bath tub and took off my soaked and over full wet diaper. Mom then took a fresh washcloth and wet it down with hot water from the sink and then wiped my diaper area with it. As she wiped my balls I started to get an erection, she then move to my penis and there was not stopping the full blown erection that I got, it was very embarrassing for me but it did not stop mom. After mom was done wiping me clean I was taken back to my room and re-diapered, then set back to the kitchen to finish my breakfast.

After breakfast mom dressed me in a pair of long pants and a some what nice shirt, socks and even put on my shoes before we headed out. We went to drug store with a medical supplies that was at the strip mall. We walked in to the store.

“Hello. How may I help you?” Asked the woman with a name tag reading Bev S. LPN.

“Hello. I am looking for some diapers that will fit my son that are better than what he has on now.”

“What brand does he have on now?” Asked Bev.

“A generic store brand.”

“And the problem you are have with them is the fit, is that correct.”

“Fit is only part of the problem, capacity is the other. My son is wearing one of the diapers now if you want to see it.”

“NO that’s OK. Hummm, the pull-up type should fit him fine. It should fit like underwear if you got the right size for him. The capacity problem might be because it is a generic and can not hold more than one wetting.”

“He did not want the pull-on kind, he went with a disposable diaper.”

“OH!” Stated Bev. “So, the diaper is for overnight use then. Please follow me.”

We walked over the incontinence supplies, as Bev explained the rating system, the higher the number in the drop the more capacity the diaper had. She showed us a few different diapers that were out on display and explained the different points of each diaper. I was interested in what Bev was saying but I was acting if I was not. Mom asked me which one I wanted, I picked the best one that they had. Bev agreed that was a good selection if I was a heavy wetter (wetting the diaper more than twice in the same night). The diaper one level down would be as good as the one I had selected if I was a moderate wetter. Mom went with that diaper, and mom ruled. Mom then asked Bev to select diapers for daytime use based on the one selected for nighttime use.

“Not that is any of my business, but why do you not want to use a pull-on kind during the day?” Bev asked.

“Bruce, tell the nice lady why you want diapers.” My mom said.

“Ahh, because, do I have too, mom?” I asked.

“Yes, or you know what tomorrow brings!” My mom stated in a tone not to fool around with.

“Really, I do not need to know your reason.” Bev said.

“Bruce, now.” My mom said.

I paused, I did not know what to say to her.

“One … Two.” Mom said.

“I want to” my face was turning red with embarrassment and I was starting to stutter “we… wea…wear di… di… diapers.”

“And” my mom said.

I could see my chances of not wearing a diaper to school tomorrow going down the drain and tears started to form in my eyes. I just could not tell a stranger that I want to wear diapers and have mommy care for like a baby. It was bad enough confessing wanting diapers to this stranger.

“Crying is not going to help you.” Mom said

“I don’t want to tell her.” I said.

“Fine, you don’t have to. You will be going to school tomorrow wearing a diaper like it or not. You can cry all you want, I am not changing my mind Bruce. You wanted to wear diapers and be treated like a baby just remember that.”

“From the sound it, you will need a diaper for an active person with a fair capacity level for daytime use. Go to Wal-MartÓ or K-MartÓ and buy some DependsÓ, they are a lot cheaper than what we charge for them here and they should work fine during the day for him.” Bev said.

Bev was being very nice and had not acted shocked by what had been said. Maybe she had run in to others that liked diapers and wanted to be babied, or maybe she thought I was just nuts. I don’t know and I hope not to see her again.

My nighttime diapers cost twenty-five dollars for eighteen diapers vs. fourteen dollars for the twenty-two Depends diapers, that I would be wearing during the days starting when we got home.

The rest of the day went by too fast. Mom changed my diapers when needed. She was nice and motherly when she changed me. After dinner, that mom feed me, was bath time. This was the first bath that I could remember mom giving me. She washed me from head to toe and then let me play in tub for a while, I almost forgot that mom was in the bathroom with me. After my bath and I was dried off I was taken to my bedroom and my night time diaper was put on me. For a disposable diaper, it was like no others that I had ever had worn. It was thicker than the other diapers and had a different fit and feel too. I was tucked into bed by eight o’clock.

“It’s too early for me to go to bed.”

“Babies in this house are in bed by eight. I will check your diaper before I go to bed. Goodnight my baby boy, you have a big day tomorrow.”

“But…”

“No buts, if you get out of this bed before tomorrow morning and I find out about it.” Said mom, with a look that say do it and you will wish that you had not done it. Mom walked out of my room closing the bedroom door.

Before falling off the sleep, I let my warm pee fill the diaper, and as the pee entered the diaper, it grew in size around my penis as it soaked it up.

Monday morning mom woke me up for school, and took off my diaper before sending me to the bathroom to get my shower. When I came out of the bathroom mom was waiting in my bedroom with my school clothes all laid out for me, she held up a diaper in one hand and my big boy underwear in her other hand.

“Which one do want to wear today?”

“My underwear.”

“Give me one good reason why.”

“Am not sure any reason I give you would fill your meaning of good. I told you the truth the other day and answered your question with the truth. Since then, you have embarrassed me about my want of wearing diapers. I know I told to do what ever you were comfortable with, I too have a comfort level and going to school in a diaper is not in that level. I am sorry that I told you the truth, if I knew that this is how I was going to be treated I would have never told you in a hundred years.” As I snatched the underwear from my mom’s hand.

“I sorry, I had read on one of the web sites of a boy being treated this way and thought that is what you wanted too, but you did not know how to tell me.”

“After two hours of talking, you read something on a web site and think that is what I want. I told you what I wanted: to be loved, not to be embarrassed by it. I know I am fourteen years old and not fourteen months old and diapers should not be part of my life but they are. PLEASE just leave me alone.”

More to come…